BY DOMINICK ALBANO
BRI NGIN G YOUR FAM ILY OF PA R IS H ES TOGET HE R Every family has at least a little bit of dysfunction. As soon as you read that, you probably thought of that one family member who just can’t seem to get along with the rest, or that one topic you never mention at the family Christmas party.
2. FORGIVE
That’s alright. Healthy human relationships necessarily include a little conflict; a little dysfunction. But there are ways we can foster healthy, loving relationships within our families, and ways we can make them worse. Our new Families of Parishes will have the same growing pains. Just as we help our human families thrive or add to the dysfunction, there are ways to help our Families of Parishes become better together and there are actions to avoid.
Forgiveness isn’t easy. We can’t cover forgiveness in depth here, but there is one act that helps: find something to love about the person you need to forgive. Think about it. It’s easier to forgive your child than that bully in high school. Why? Because you love your child.
Three acts you can do to help your Family of Parishes thrive: 1. ALWAYS ASSUME THE BEST
Assuming the best about people is a Christian virtue. Assuming good intentions makes life better. For example, when someone cuts you off in traffic, you can assume that person is an unsafe jerk, feel a little road rage and be annoyed for the next few hours, or assume he or she either didn’t see you or has an emergency, then pray for their safety and continue your day with no lasting effects. That’s the power of assuming the best. Assume the best about your new Family of Parishes. Give them the benefit of the doubt. Believe in the good. This is a critical element of healthy relationships and will help your Family of Parishes thrive in the upcoming months! 8 | THE C ATHOLIC TELE GRAPH
Past wounds poison future relationships – plain and simple. If you can’t forgive, you can’t heal, and if you can’t heal, you can’t be healthy.
If you struggle to forgive a parish in your new Family of Parishes, find something to love about it. In fact, find something to love about each parish in your new Family of Parishes. Maybe it’s the beauty of their building, the strength of their school, or a wonderful event they host. 3. BE KIND, NOT NICE
What’s the difference between being kind and being nice? Being kind is for the good of the other person, being nice is for yourself. Kindness requires a greater love for the other. We can be “nice” for selfish motivations. It’s kind to subtly inform a person about the broccoli stuck in their teeth. It’s “nice” to ignore it and not say anything because that might be awkward, for them and for you, but it doesn’t save them from further embarrassment. Be kind to your new Family of Parishes.
