THE ANCHORThurs., July 4, 1963
Tells Parents· Prepare Older Children _for Baby's Arrival
Urges Amnesty For Prisoners
By Fr. Walter w. Imbiorski Dear Father: , I am -expecting my second child in four months. Is there anything I can do to help Julie, who is three, adjust to the new baby. In some families I have seen the older child take a real dislike to Boasting or talking too the new baby and, in one in him. much, or just being too sweet stance, even try to do the about him may cover up for baby physical harm. How angry feelings which she thinks her parents will disapprove. can I avoid this? It is pretty typical for young Pam L. Dear Pam, First of all, stop worrying about It. People have been bringing home second babies for tens of thousands of years. I am lIUre tha~ your good common aense will carry you through without ~rrin!._ litUe Julie'll psyche.·. ,;:.. As _we know, even the very young child has sensitivities and can be deeply affected by the things which go on in the family circle. So, some time spent in preparing Julie for her new brother or sister will be well invested. Practical Points Remember Julie has been the center of all your love and at tention for three years. Now she Is going to be asked to share the .potlight. One wit has said, with some truth, that the coming of a ·new baby is about as shocking to the older child as a husband's announcement to his spouse that he is bringing home a second wife to share the household. Here are some practical points to consider until the new babr,s place is comfortable established in the family. If Julie is to be ~ved from her crib or her room, make the change now "because she UI getting bigger" and not because "'the new baby needs it." Help Bab,. Leam When you tell Julie about the baby, don't paint unrealistic pie tures about a playmate. Make lure she knows that the new born infant will be very tiny. Tell her that it will be quite il while before he can walk ·or talk or do the things she does. By your own enthusiasm let her know that it will be fun to watch and help the baby learn things. . Try such a simple thing 'as having someone else carry the . baby into the house when you return from the hospital IJO that you al'e free for a welcoming hug. Letting Julie hold the baby for a few moments, sitting In a big safe chair with a watch ful adult nearby; can .break the ice. Later try suggesting to visi tors that they "speak to Julie first" and let her show them the baby. If the older child nags for at tention, becomes especially or nery or irritating, begins to act like a baby himself or goes back to bed-wetting, these are signs that he is unsure of his parents' love or care. Extra attention, . more "grown up" privileges, more time with Mommy ot" Daddy, a toy, or a trip to the park, or just so m e warm cuddling can be very l'eassuring and will probably handle the • ituation. Develop Understandinc Resentment may be concealed under behavior that looks just like its opposite. "Julie loves to baby" may mean that she is only hovering anxiously over
children to resent, as well as love, the new baby until they figure out just how he fits into their lives AND until they realize he is not a rival but a friend. Feelings of resentment al'e better expressed than buried. Talking about them can help clear the air. Even somewhat older, school age !=hildren may show some resentment and "gripe" about the extra trouble or work the new baby causes. A story or two about the time when HE Walt small and received the same care can coax him to sense a feeling of closeness and can start him to develop under standing the baby. Groundwork for Parents sometimes concen trate on sparing the older child, only to find later that the younger one has felt neglected. Your parental vocation requires the balance of a tightrope walker, without his tenseness plus the imaginative insight of an artist and always wisdom and understanding. Too much pro tection for either the older child or the ba'by postpones the time when both come to accept each other. Parents can best. lay the groundwork for future affec tion and family- loyalty among their children by welcoming the new baby while continuing to cherish and enjoy the older children as warmly as before.
Lo,..It,.
9
MySTERY.EAKER? FiJin':maker Alfred Hitchcock kisses ring of Archbishop Joseph T. McGucken of San Francisco at University of Santa Clara where mystery-film maker gave commencement address.
Madonna Plan in Africa C!'inks Memorialize Mary Hannan Mahoney, Former Women's Council President SHINYANGA (NC)-The hus band of a past president of the National Council of Catholic Women in the U. S. has arrived here to visit six living memorials to his wife., . Dr. Robert Mahoney, of Hart ford, Conn., whose wife, Mary, served as NCCW president for two years will visit five Mary Hannan Mahoney Memorial mo ther-child clinics in this African diocese and attend the dedica tion of a sixth. These memorials are part of more than 100 NCCW Madonna Plan hospital facilities for moth ers and children throughout the
world.
Under the Madonna Plan, af filiates of the NCCW furnish fi nancial assistance. to mother baby health centers which pro vide medical, health and nutri. tion care for mothers. The plan was initiated in 1957 during Mrs. Mahoney's presidency and though her encouragement. The clinics in Tanganyika, and a hospital which vrill be built in the future, were dedicated to Mrs. Mahoney's memory by Bis hop Edward A. McGurkin, M.M., of Shinyanga, who is a native of Hartford. Dr. Mahoney is associate su perintendent of schools in Hart ford.
CAMBRA! (NC) ..,.... Archbish. op Emile Guerry of Cambrai has called for an amnesty for Frenchmen still in jail for poli tical crimes committed during the war in Algeria. "Amnesty covers the moral and human aspects of order, the only aspects we take up here, in keeping with our spiritual and social mission," the Archbishop said in his archdiocese's offi cial bulletin. "Amnesty should be first of all an act of national reconcili ation. "Frenchmen are divided on the interpretation of the ex tremely com pie x historical events which culminated 'hi'the independence of Algeria. "Division among sons of the same country is always an evil, especially when it provokes or m a i n t a ins resentment and hatred. An amnesty should be the occasion for a powerful movement of mutual under standing, active solidarity and national reconciliation."
Assign Lay Volunteers To Colorado Places DUBUQUE (NC) - Eighteen lay volunteers have been as signed to Catholic missions in the western United States in ceremonies at Clarke College here in Iowa. Archbishop James J. Byrne of Dubuque conferred the mission crosses on the volunteers. Five will spend a year in Catholic schools and parishes in Colorado and 13 will serve in Colorado towns this Summer. Most of the volunteers are stu dents from Loras and· Clarke colleges in Dubuque and Mount Mercy in Cedar Rapi<k.
Perfect
'Our Pope; Too,' Says . Protestant Paper .
for
OTTAWA (NC) -The head line read: "John 'Our Pope' Too." The story under it said: "It was fantastic, really, the way we came to regard him as belong ing to us. Once when he reCeiVed a delegation of Jewish people he met them with the words 'I am Joseph, your brother,' That" the way he affected most of US." The tribute to Pope John XXIII was paid in the Observer, pubU cation of the United Church ·of· Canada and the story was writ ten by Rev. Dr. A. C. Forrest, the editor. It was typical of scores of other tributes paid to the late Pope by secular and non Catholic publications throughou& Canada. .
Picnics
and
Barbecues
Takes Final Advice VATICAN CITY (N:C) Faithful to the final advice 01. Pope John, his private secret tary, Msgr. Loris Capovilla, h. flown to Venice for a visit with his mother. On June I, as tM Pope lay dying, he told the monsignor: "When all this • over, don't forget to go 'see your mother."
GEORGE M. MONTLE
Plumbing - Heating
Academy Student Wins College Scholarship WEST HARTFORD (NC) Marlene Basnight, 17, junior at Mount st. Joseph Academy here, is one of 10 high school students who won $6,000 college scholar ships in a national essay contest. The winners, who come from eight states and Rabat, Morocco, wrote on the topic, "My Most Unforgettable Teacher." Miss Basnight's subject was Sister Catherine Mary of the acadetn7 faculty. _ ' More than 25,000 entries were received in the contest, the G-J: College Bowl television Pl"Osram, the sponsor announced.
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