KIDS Coping with Stress in WV

This

INTRODUCTION FOR PARENTS & CAREGIVERS

This booklet was originally developed in response to the COVID-19 pandemic. The pandemic left us with a greater awareness of the impact of stress and the importance of mental health. This booklet has been updated to focus on the effects of stress and healthy ways of managing mental health and wellness.

Current research shows that children are more stressed than they have ever been. Many factors play into the increase in stress amongst children including; academic pressure, social media and fewer outlets for stress relief. The good news is, with help, children can learn about effective ways to deal with stress.

The intention of this booklet is to help children better understand their feelings and build a coping toolkit. This booklet is meant to serve as a quick, practical guide for children ages 4 to 10. For children older than 10, there is a “Coping with Stress in West Virginia” and there is also a “Teens Coping with Stress in West Virginia”. This booklet provides age appropriate activities and information for children to learn about their own emotions and reactions as they navigate challenging situations. Throughout the booklet, there is information for caregivers about how to assist a child as they complete the activities contained in this booklet. It is hoped that this booklet can be personalized as needed.

LEARNING ABOUT STRESS

Have you ever felt stressed? Stress is normal and it happens to everyone. Sometimes stress can be good. Stress can give you energy to do important things, like homework or sports practice. However, too much stress is not good. It can happen when you feel worried or scared about something. Stress can affect your mind and your body. When you are stressed your body can feel extra wiggly, you can have big feelings, and your mind can have a lot of thoughts running through it.

There are lots of things you can do to feel better when you are stressed. This booklet will teach you about different ways to cope with stress. These tools will help you learn how to calm your mind and body.

Think about any questions you have about stress and ask an adult to answer them.

NOTE TO PARENTS & CAREGIVERS

Sometimes our children ask hard questions! If you’re not sure how to answer a question that your child has, know that it is okay. Let your child know that you are not sure of the answer but you will do your best to find out. The most important part of this activity is to remind our children that they have a safe person to whom they can ask hard questions.

WHAT DO ALL THESE WORDS MEAN?

Anxiety: Feeling worried or nervous often.

• Example: Feeling nervous every morning when you wake up for school.

Behavioral: The way we act.

• Example: Temper tantrum, following directions.

Coping skill: An activity that you can do to handle uncomfortable feelings and feel less stress.

• Example: Taking a deep breath when you start to feel frustrated.

Covid-19: An illness that can make some people very sick and is easily spread from person to person.

Emotional: Our feelings and mood (these can be comfortable or uncomfortable).

• Example: Love, excitement, mad, sad, happy, scared.

Mental: Our thoughts.

• Example: Reading, solving a math problem, making a decision.

Pandemic: When an illness or disease that makes people sick

spreads quickly throughout the country or world.

• Example: Covid-19 pandemic

Physical: Our body and the way it reacts to something (this can be comfortable or uncomfortable).

• Example: Mosquito bite (itchy), bubble bath (warm).

Self-esteem: How you think and feel about yourself.

• Example: Self-esteem can be high or low. If we have high self-esteem, we mostly feel good about ourselves. Sometimes when we have low self-esteem, it is hard for us to feel good about ourselves.

Stress: What you feel when you are worried or uncomfortable with something or someone.

• Example: Feeling nervous for an exam.

YOUR REACTIONS TO STRESS

It is normal to experience a lot of reactions in response to stress, including physical, mental, emotional, and behavioral reactions. Which of the following have you experienced over the past year in response to a stressful situation?

NOTE TO ADULTS AND CAREGIVERS: Please seek help if you or your child experience ANY reactions that interfere with daily functioning. If you need immediate assistance, call 911.

Physical Reactions

YES NO

Stomachache

Headaches

Shivering, shaking, or having a hard time sitting still

Fast Heartbeat

Sweaty Hands

Change in breathing (too fast)

Having a hard time falling asleep

Having bad dreams

Feelings in Our Body

Have you ever felt your feelings in your body? Sometimes our feelings show up in our bodies and that is called “the mind body connection”. If we’re sad we might have a headache or when we’re nervous we might have butterflies in our stomachs. Did you know, our bodies can help us to figure out how we feel?

Do you ever feel worried in your body? Circle what happens to you when you are feeling worried.

Butterflies in Stomach Fast Heartbeat

Tense Shoulders

Headache Tears

Sweaty Hands

Shaking Knees

Gingerbread Feelings

Now you can color your own! Where are your feelings in your body? You can use the color chart below or create your own.

Mad = Happy = Worried = Excited = Sad = Silly = Loved = Scared = Tired = Calm =

NOTE TO ADULTS AND CAREGIVERS: This activity can help you initiate conversation about feelings with your child. When your child has completed the activity, say “tell me about it”. As your child explains how they experience anxiety in their body, let them know the ways in which you experience similar physical symptoms. This helps normalize a child’s emotional experience and builds their comfort level in talking about feelings.

JUST BREATHE

Did you know that sometimes just breathing can be the best thing we can do to make our worries smaller? When we are feeling nervous our heart beats faster and we can sometimes breathe harder and more quickly. We can calm down our mind and our body by taking slow deep breaths. You can even have fun with it and use your imagination!

Try these activities to learn how to do deep breathing and see which ones are your favorites! Do you feel different after doing them?

Dragon Breath

Breathe in with your arms straight up to the sky. As you breathe out, open your mouth wide, stick your tongue out, and ROAR like a dragon while throwing your arms forward. Repeat!

Bumble Bee Breath

Close your eyes and cover your ears. Inhale through your nose and quietly hum as you exhale. You will feel vibrations in your head. Do you feel calmer?

JUST BREATHE

Straw Breath

Make your tongue into a “straw” shape by curling both sides up. Deeply inhale through your tongue straw, slurping up whatever cold drink you’d like to imagine. Close your mouth and exhale through your nose.

Deep Breath

Imagine that you have a flower in front of you. Take a big, strong smell of that flower and hold your breath. Then breathe out fully through your mouth.

NOTE TO ADULTS AND CAREGIVERS: Deep breathing has a physical effect on our bodies that helps to transition from “fight, flight or freeze” mode to a calmer mode. Help coach your child in this exercise. If possible, help your child take a deep breath in a way that causes their belly to get bigger. This type of breathing will help expand your child’s lungs and get more oxygen into their bloodstream. The more your child is able to practice this skill in a calm, safe setting, the more available it will be to them when they are feeling anxious.

My Mental Reactions

YES NO

Being forgetful

Having trouble thinking and concentrating

Having scary or confusing thoughts

Not wanting to hang out with friends

Having a hard time making decisions

DOODLE SPACE

Mindfulness

Mindfulness is something that can help us when our mental reactions become too big. Mindfulness means to become aware or to be very present in the moment. When you are fully paying attention to the present moment, it is hard to worry or feel sad. It is important to remember that feelings don’t last forever, they change just like the weather. Using mindfulness can help a feeling pass more quickly.

You can do this activity inside or outside. If the weather is nice, go outside for a change of scenery!

Mindfulness is focusing all of your attention on the here and now. As you notice each of the things below, see if you can focus on all of them at the same time for one minute! Time yourself!

Notice what you see

Notice what you smell

Notice what you hear

Notice what you can touch

Notice what you taste

NOTE TO ADULTS AND CAREGIVERS: Another way to do this activity is to give children a paper bag to collect these items. After they have collected each of them, ask them to tell you about them. For items children can not collect, encourage them to take pictures. When the activity is over children can keep their paper bag full of items and pictures so they can use them to practice mindfulness later.

My Emotional Reactions

YES NO

Feeling nervous or worried

Feeling scared

Feeling sad

Feeling mad or grumpy

Feeling lonely

Not feeling very much or anything at all

DOODLE SPACE

Feelings

How big are your feelings? Have you ever felt big sad? Sometimes we feel just a little bit of a feeling and sometimes we feel a whole lot of a feeling. This is normal! Sometimes you may even have two big feelings at the same time! Maybe one day you felt big happy because you got to play with your friend but you also felt a little bit sad because you couldn’t go to the park. This is called mixed feelings. Our feelings can get big and small throughout the day. It’s good to notice how you are feeling so that you can deal with your feelings.

NOTE TO ADULTS AND CAREGIVERS: If your child shares that they are experiencing a difficult feeling don’t be alarmed. Remember that we are all uncomfortable sometimes, and it is important to learn how to deal with those feelings. The best thing to do is to be empathic. Tell your child that you know it can be hard to feel sad (or mad, or worried) but that it’s okay and you are there for them whenever they want to talk about it. Don’t make your child talk about uncomfortable feelings if they don’t want to. The important part is they know that they can talk to you when needed. Sometimes anger can be a mask for sadness. If you are noticing that your child is sad often, it may be helpful to reach out to a mental health professional for support.

How Are You Feeling Right Now?

Look at the thermometers and color in how much of each feeling you are experiencing. If you are experiencing none of the feeling, do not color the thermometer in at all.

All feelings are normal!

Look at the chart and pick which color goes with each feeling. Color the heart with your feelings. When you are done, you will have a heart map!

FEELING COLOR

Mad Happy

Worried Sad Excited

Calm Scared

Loved

Behavioral Reactions

YES NO

Acting more hyper than usual

Eating more junk food

Trying to avoid school work or chores more than usual

Being mean to other people

Sleeping too much or too little

Having trouble following directions

Having meltdowns

DOODLE SPACE

Yoga

NOTE TO ADULTS AND CAREGIVERS: Yoga is not just for adults! In fact, it can give children very important life skills that can help them succeed in the world and can have a positive impact on a child’s overall well-being. Yoga includes both physical poses as well as breathing exercises. A few of the benefits are listed below!

Increases body awareness and mindfulness

Improves emotional regulation and reduces anxiety

Enhances concentration and memory

Helps develop strength and flexibility

Boosts self-esteem and confidence

Helps you learn to let go and have fun!

Sometimes when we are stressed, our minds act like monkeys!

Jumping around from one thought to the next. But, we have the power to slow our thoughts back down! We can do this in many ways, including moving our body and focusing our thoughts. Try out the activity on the next page and see if you feel calmer afterwards.

Try to pose like each picture to the right and say each sentence 4 times before moving into the next pose. You can either say the words out loud or silently. Try saying them in your head, then whispering them, then saying them in your

I am brave.

I am strong.

I am kind.

I am smart.

I am calm.

Yoga Games!

Now, let’s play some yoga games! Sometimes moving our bodies can help us relax and let go of some of our worries.

Tear out the next few pages and cut out each square to make your very own yoga card deck! Then try out the games below or get creative with games of your own!

MEMORY: The first person draws a card from the deck and does that yoga pose (example: cow pose). The second person draws a card from the deck and then has to do the previous pose plus the one they drew (example: cow pose, frog pose). The next person repeats this process (example: cow pose, frog pose, camel pose). Play until someone forgets the sequence!

DICE GAME: Draw a card from the deck and roll a dice. Whatever number the dice lands on is how many breaths the player has to hold the pose. (example: hold flamingo pose for 4 whole breaths!)

CHARADES: Each player takes a turn at drawing a card. The player acts out the pose on their selected card, and then the other players have to guess the name of the yoga pose. Repeat until everyone gets at least one turn.

BUTTERFLY POSE

COW POSE

DOWN DOG POSE

TURTLE POSE

LION POSE FROG POSE

CAT POSE

CAMEL POSE

SNAKE POSE GIRAFFE POSE

MONKEY POSE FLAMINGO POSE

WHAT CAN YOU DO?

One of the things that makes stress so hard is that it feels like you don’t have control. Now you know that there are a lot of things you can do to help when you feel stressed.

Sleep

One of the most important things you can do to deal with stress is to get good sleep! Sleep helps your body calm down. When you get good sleep you are usually in a better mood the next day and it is easier to focus at school.

Do fun things with friends and family

Sometimes when you are stressed you may not feel like hanging out with your friends and family. It turns out that spending time having fun with the people you care about usually helps you to feel better.

Talk to someone who cares

Everyone needs someone to talk to! When your stress and worries get big, sometimes it helps to talk it out with someone you trust. Friends, parents and teachers are often good people to talk to about stress.

Make a plan

Stress comes and goes and is a normal part of life. You can’t avoid stress but you can make a plan for it. If you have a plan for stress, you are more likely to use your coping strategies the next time you feel stressed!

MY COPING TOOLKIT

Use this page to make a plan for the next time you are feeling stressed.

People I can talk to: (for example: your parents, a favorite teacher):

Fun things I like to do to get my mind off stress (for example: play outside, do puzzles):

Coping strategies I like to use when I am stressed (for example: deep breathing, yoga):

Word Search

Find the following words in the puzzle.

Words are hidden and .

Ask Questions

Think about any questions you still have about stress and ask an adult to answer them.

You have done a great job working on this booklet! We hope you have learned some new skills that will help you deal with uncomfortable feelings. Even though stress challenges us all, remember that there are things we can do to deal with it. Keep this booklet in your room or your backpack so you can look at it when you need a little extra help to deal with stress. Remember...

...you are STRONG, you are BRAVE, you can cope with STRESS!

DOODLE SPACE

RESOURCES FOR ADULTS & CAREGIVERS

RESOURCES

Help & Hope WV

www.HelpandHopeWV.org

This website is an educational and resource-rich website that includes links to many of the resources listed below.

RESOURCES WITH LIVE HELPLINES

HELP4WV

https://www.help4wv.com/ 1-844-HELP4WV (1-844-435-7498)

Provides immediate help for those struggling with addiction or mental health issues. HELP4WV features 24-hour access to call, text, and chat. It also has a searchable on-line resource directory.

988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline

988lifeline.org

Call, text, or chat 988

Provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.

We can all help prevent suicide.

RESOURCES FOR ADULTS & CAREGIVERS

The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.

DOODLE SPACE

Special thanks to the writers and consultants of this booklet!

Megan C. Phillips, MSW, Licensed Clinical Social Worker - writer

Katarina Candee, BMDS, Registered Yoga Teacher, 200 hours (RYT 200) - writer

Wyatt Phillips and Hannah Phillips - kid reviewers

Martha Minter, MSW, Licensed Clinical Social Worker - writer

For further reading, please see:

Levine, P. and Kline, M. (2007). Trauma Through a Child’s Eyes: Awakening the Ordinary Miracle of Healing. North Atlantic Books, Berkeley, CA.

Levine, P. and Kline, M. (2008). Trauma-Proofing Your Kids: A Parents’ Guide for Instilling Confidence, Joy and Resilience. North Atlantic Books, Berkeley, CA.