UNEMPLOYMENT & YOUR RELATIONSHIP
KEEPING IT HEALTHY IN UNCERTAIN TIMES LORI NASH, M.A, LMFT, COUNSELOR AT SWINOMISH
You lose more than just a paycheck when, suddenly, you’re unemployed. Of course, being let go or furloughed during this Coronavirus outbreak is not your fault, but it can still take a toll on your emotional wellbeing and your relationship. Here are six tips to keep your feelings and your relationship feeling solid while the rest of the world seems shaky.
1) MAINTAIN STRUCTURE IN YOUR LIFE
Work gives you a feeling of purpose in life. It also brings a sense of accomplishment and self-esteem. This is why it’s important that you maintain structure in your days. Watching television or playing video games in your sweats for hours might be okay for a day or two, but in the long run, this behavior will make you feel depressed and without purpose. So, set goals for yourself! Get up and go to bed at about the same time as you would if you were still working. Do home projects together that you’ve been putting off. Use your mind by reading, doing crossword puzzles, learning something new that’s always intrigued you. Use your body; go for a walk, find a fun exercise or yoga video on YouTube and do it with your partner in your yard or living room. This will help give you a sense of control.
2) MAINTAIN COMMUNICATION WITH YOUR PARTNER
3) WORK TOGETHER TO SET FINANCIAL GOALS, AND COME UP WITH A BUDGET This can be tricky, as you both might have different ideas how your money should be spent. Listen to each other’s perspectives with respect, so the conversation doesn’t spiral down into a fight. For fun, make a list of things you can do together that don’t cost any money.
4) MAKE IT A HABIT TO EXPRESS GRATITUDE TO EACH OTHER EVERY DAY Thank each other for the compromises and sacrifices you’re both making right now. Express your love daily, and tell each other one thing you appreciated about them that day. This simple exercise can make a huge positive impact on your relationship.
5) GET OUT OF THE HOUSE TOGETHER OFTEN WHILE PRACTICING SOCIAL DISTANCING WITH OTHERS Go for walks, play catch or Frisbee, have a picnic, enjoy the beauty of nature. It’s no surprise that some doctors prescribe time in nature to improve their patients’ health!
6) COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS TOGETHER
For some, it’s natural to withdraw during stressful times, but more than ever, this is a time to maintain your Number a sheet of paper from 1-100, and over a week’s time, complete a list of 100 things you are grateful for. connection You’ll be surprised how this simple exercise can shift your perspective. Set aside some uninterrupted time each day to connect (put away phones, computers, and tablets). Take turns This pandemic is scary, unpredictable, and there are a lot talking and listening and get everything out on the table of unknowns; but we’ll get through it. Things will return for discussion. to a “new normal” that you and your partner can work Both of you will experience different feelings during a together to create for yourselves and your family. time of unemployment, and it’s not either of your jobs to fix each other’s feelings. Your jobs are to listen, accept what your partner has to say, and attempt to understand where she/he is coming from. Coronavirus Information & Resource Guide 15
