The Story Matters
Calendar p.14 This Sunday is Fall For the Arts at the Arsht. Bring the kids to have fun in the Craft Corner making musical instruments from found objects.
Vol. XXV No. 34
September 9, 2010
Visit us at sunpostweekly.com
Grove Bed Race Mania SEE PAGE 10
BOULEVARD BLUES Street Repairs Wreak Havoc on Biscayne Boulevard Businesses Bottom Line MAYHEM P.4
PROFILE P. 6
POLITICS P. 8
CALENDAR P.14
FILM P. 18
411 P.20
GO! P. 23
SEX P.24
SEE PAGE 12
FASHION P. 26
EXECUTIVE EDITOR Kim Stark kim@sunpostweekly.com SOCIETY EDITOR Jeannette Stark jeannette@sunpostweekly.com
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Tropical Mayhem BITS AND PIECES OF MIAMI LIFE
Miami through my iphone
These pieces are so fabulous. Beautiful reclaimed Brazilian, organic wood is transformed into one-of-akind, hand-crafted conversation pieces for the home. We especially dig the naturally unique coffee table. A reclaimed slab of Tamburiuva wood paired with a transparent plexi glass base. It looks like the wood is floating. A natural piece of art. $3,800. These large planters are a fascinating mosaic of salvaged wood pieces. The largest planter is 47” high and the smallest comes in at 32” in height. Very substantial, very green and very right now. $990 $1,250. Currently marked down at Avant Gallery, 3850 N. Miami Ave., Miami. or online at avantgallery.com
Reclaimed Brazilian
FOREIGN TRADITIONS by Ines Hegedus-Garcia - miamism.com - ines@miamism.com You cannot visit Miami without eating at a Brazilian steakhouse at least once, unless of course you are a vegetarian. And if you’re like my family, with ravenous teenage boys, you will visit very often. They are all-you-can-eat restaurants with all kinds of cuts of meat, Brazilian side dishes and gourmet salad bars. This photo was taken at Fogo de Chao in South Beach, one of our all-time faves - awesome service, food and don’t skip on their signature papaya cream dessert with black currant liqueur, YUM.
12-12-12 MURAL PROJECT
Gerry Stecca, a Bakehouse Art Complex artist, is competing to win the PEPSI REFRESH IDEA grant for the month of September. Pepsi is giving away millions of dollars in the form of grants to individuals to help them accomplish great things. The grants are decided by the general public voting. The most votes wins for the month. Stecca’s 50K idea is called The 1212-12 Mural Project. He would like to create 12 murals in 12 months in 12 underprivileged schools in Miami Dade County. To support this effort you can go online to: refresheverything.com/121212muralsproject and vote or text: 102364 to 73774. Love it! STECCA’S MURAL ON THE OUTSIDE WALL OF THE VAGABOND.
Page 4 • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • SunPost Weekly • www.sunpostweekly.com
L ’Shanah Tovah to our Jewish Readers
May the New Year Bring Fulfillment, Happiness, Peace and Prosperity
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WE WISH OUR FRIENDS A HAPPY AND HEALTHY NEW YEAR
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Can He Say That? COLUMN
Shhh! Don’t Wake the Dead! They Need Their Sleep By Charles Branham-Bailey Those damn killjoys are at it again. Drat! The City of Miami wants to construct a skateboard park on a parcel of land next door to the historic 113year-old Miami Cemetery, final resting place to a host of city pioneers and founders, like Julia Tuttle and Dr. James Jackson, father of Jackson Memorial Hospital. A benevolent idea – give the kids a skateboard park! give them a place to burn off that adolescent energy and get them off those couches and away from those sedentary-lifestyle-inviting Xboxes – so who could oppose? A gaggle of contrarian old farts, that’s who. Descendants of those buried there. Local preservationists. Congregants of nearby Temple Israel. “If your family buried you there, they buried you there peacefully,” complained descendant Dorothy Graham, as reported in the Aug. 22 Miami Herald. “And they meant for you to stay there peacefully.” Stay there peacefully. Gosh, I sure hope the dead don’t decide to get up one night en masse and seek out eternal sanctuary elsewhere all because of some damn rowdy pack of skateboardin’ kids spoiling their “peaceful” sleep. A sudden parade of walking dead has the potential to cause quite a disturbing commotion. All hell could break loose. (And not just what’s coming out of the ground at the cemetery!) Overtown residents flooding 911 call lines. Some fainting, some fleeing, some loading up shotguns. Squad cars and TV news vans converging on the scene. Pandemonium City! Night of the Walking Dead! YIKES! Which brings us to the question (actually two): Why should the dead “rest in peace?” How – in their current state – would they even KNOW they weren’t resting in peace, much less CARE if they weren’t, if they weren’t? And some more questions: Six feet under ain’t “peaceful” enough for ya? Exactly how much dirt needs to separate the dead from all the sounds and noises from up above so that they may be ensured their “rest”? How much space do the dead require, pray tell, for the so-called “peace” that you pea-brained knuckleheads believe they need? A city block? The length of a football stadium? Half a county? Dig a hole six feet down, drop yourselves in it, and fill it in. How much above-ground noise do you reckon you’d hear down there? Surrounding that or any other cemetery with a highdecibel airport on one side, a sports stadium with roaring, cheering fans on another, a Metallica concert on a third, and a noisy construction site with ear-busting jackhammers and bulldozers on the fourth STILL would not wake the dead. They’re dead. They’re gone.
Page 8 • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • SunPost Weekly • www.sunpostweekly.com
And did you old farts and fartesses never consider that maybe those lying there in Miami Cemetery might actually prefer – yes, prefer – some young-bloods in the neighborhood? (“It’s really too sedate and quiet here among us dead.”) Might prefer some excitement? (“Too many of us codgers lying here, taking dirt naps. Sure! Send some young whipper-snappers over with their noise to entertain us! Some of us ain’t been entertained since Rudy Vallée and talking pictures came out.”) Did any of you actually amble over to Julia Tuttle’s headstone and ask Miami’s founding mother for her opinion on this whole affair? Maybe Ms. Tuttle might like a little company from the teenage T-shirt-and-jeans set with the slip-slidin’ hot wheels under their feet. Sadly, it’s come to this: The groundbreaking on any skateboard park for the site may be held up by silly people with stupid superstitions and notions about the dead: “The dead are still with us” (No, they aren’t). Or hovering over us like Marley’s ghost – or Casper’s. Or trying to communicate with us via seances and Ouija boards. Or – and how I so detest this ridiculous phrase – that they need to “rest in peace”. They don’t need ANYTHING. They’re GONE. This is a world for the living. Who cares about what the dead might think? They’re gone. GONE! If they could, they’d likely implore us to get on with life and forget what we might think they might want. Some people just can’t stand the thought of young people having fun, enjoying life. These are mostly old farts too physically worn down, or too dyspeptic and irritable, or enslaved by religious or cultural stupidity, to enjoy the fun they seek to stamp out or deprive others of. But one need not be of a certain chronological age to be among the Society of Old Farts. Twenty- and thirtysomethings can just as easily be members, too. It’s not a state of age so much as a state of mind (albeit a calcified, hardened one) – 17 state attorneys general (shockingly, our own Bill McCollum was NOT among them) ganged up and pressured Craigslist.com last week to take down its adult services section, concerned that the ads were promoting prostitution, degradation of women, human trafficking, and god-only-knows-what-else-from-a-Pandora’s-box-ofsocietal-ills they tried blaming on the popular website. What two (or more) consenting adults wish to harmlessly engage in among themselves should be only their business and no one else’s, not even government’s. When will sanctimonious shits like these ever accept that? Old farts. People who don’t want same-sex marriage, for whatever reason, be it out of religious bigotry or outright ho-
mophobia. Old farts. People who feel the urge to disinfect our airwaves, our movies, our internet, our music, our art, our electronic and print media – everything – of any scintilla of what they uniquely consider obscene, blasphemous, unholy, you name it. Old farts. Often when I stop by my post office at Washington and 13th in Miami Beach, I’m greeted by a flock of teenage boys on their skateboards outside the entrance, doing stunts off the steps and ramps in front, in flagrant violation of posted signs that forbid skateboarding. When America’s kids are embarrassingly becoming fat, fatter, and the fattest in the world, thanks to sedentary lifestyles and unhealthy eating habits, we should be encouraging – hell, mandating – they get out and get some exercise. Ride that skateboard! Mount that surfboard! Don those rollerblades! Ride that bike! Rip those damn signs down – “NO this. NO that.” – and instead erect signs promoting “DO this. DO that. We WANT you to do it. Not only do we WANT you to, we’ll even give you incentives, we’ll give you rewards, we’ll give you $, we’ll give you prizes!” “We’ll BUILD you skateboard parks!” Old farts (he writes, shaking his head). Crotchety, crabby, cranky ol’ curmudgeons with their Depends underpants all in a crinkle over the prospect of skateboarders waking the dead. Please, you grumpy gripers, go stir up trouble elsewhere, over some other matter. Like the early bird special. Or the price of Metamucil. Or perhaps just grab a skateboard, join in, and pop a few wheelies with the whipper-snappers. Show ‘em age is nothing but a number, and a trivial one at that. Hey, now there’s an idea! Have fun while you still can.
A FINAL SHOUT-OUT TO JACK HORKHEIMER It came as sad news to learn of the passing weeks ago of Jack Horkheimer, Miami Museum of Science and Space Transit Planetarium’s longtime director, better known to one and all as public television’s “Star Gazer,” our affable TV guide to the universe, the night sky, and all the awe-inducing elements of it. I recall catching some of his weekly broadcasts – which were beamed from Miami to stations all over the country – as early as the 80’s. His brief astronomy lesson, served up with his folksy, cornball humor and chirpy voice, was the last thing that aired on my local public television station, right before the station signed off at midnight. He was one of my first introductions to people and things South Floridian, years before I ever moved here. At the end of each program, he implored us to “keep looking up”. Thanks to Jack, lots of us now know a lot more about our ever-fascinating universe whenever we look up at it. See what you dead people out at Miami Cemetery are missing out on? For shame. If you weren’t six feet under, covered up by all that dirt, you, too, would be able to enjoy the view of the night sky. I’m tempted to come out with a shovel and start digging you all up, but then the noise from the digging would only disturb your peaceful rest. And soil the Depends of a lot of old farts.
Politics COLUMN
Shoulda Been Elected By Jeffrey Bradley Budget decisions are kinda like querulous in-laws; hard to take, but affecting you only about once a year. So the proposed parking revenue bond on the upcoming Commission Meeting Agenda that places the City in debt for $70 million for the next 30 years would be like having your mother-in-law with access to your credit card coming and charging everything in advance. The administration played elected officials like a Stradivarius when they lead ‘em to believe that the Parking Department constituted a closed Enterprise Fund, where any and all income was restricted in use. Turns out that’s not exactly true, thanks to Gabrielle Redfern. Candidate for commissioner just last year, this indefatigable individual spent months questioning, investigating and prodding to identify recent excess revenue in the parking department. Because of her efforts, your tax increase this year was reduced by 2/10 of a mill, saving the average homeowner around 60 bucks in taxes. To secure enough votes for this budget fix—there was a $4 million unfunded hole—parking rates for non-residents will increase over the next two years in selected areas. How is it that someone outside City Hall had to point out this salient financial fact? Seems like the classic case of not being able to see the forest OR the trees. This is the same bond proposal we referred to in our July 15 article Putting ‘The Breaks’ On Parking. The trip-wire then was a never-before used ordinance requiring notice and two public hearings concerning the true costs of projects to be funded by debt. It just so happens that Parking raises $30 million a year without hardly trying, so it behooves examining finances there more closely. There’s more from the using-a-sledgehammer-toswat-a-fly department: the City has absolutely no transportation master plan but naturally has one for parking. But the Purdy Avenue garage proposed to be funded with this debt is not in that plan, and contributes zero to its goals. What this garage DOES do is address a lack of 30 parking spaces at peak-hour with a twenty-five million dollar structure. Who would be idiot enough to put signature to that egregious nonsense? Worse, the City—using borrowed money, mind you—wants to pay for the construction of this garage when it doesn’t even own the land to set it upon. Long story short: the lawyers got hold of the deal, complicated it, and persuaded the City to purchase “air rights” in order to erect it. Now, we don’t know about you, but if we went to a concert and the band played “air guitars” we’d be awfully angry. Do you see where we’re going with this? Can you sense the outrage? Understand: this is a garage where the City plans on renting spaces to itself for parking 60 cars—and still lose money the first five years! What’s the point? Even if this 458-space garage comes in at the $20 million budget level the cost will be over $40,000.00 a space—including those ludicrous air-rights acquisition costs! C’mon; do
they take us for not having opposable thumbs? How can ANYONE in their right mind square that when we’re fretting over funding school liaisons in the police department for a measly $185,000.00 a year? Whoever’s willing to live with building parking that costs more than twice the price of your average car, well, bring ‘em on. Borrowing $70 million without addressing the core issues of congestion and the lack of mass transit is unconsciousable and something we’ll fight tooth and nail. Remember that twenty million dollars of this new debt goes to refinance the last round of bonds already taken out on future revenue to build more parking. This happened in 1997; in the 13 years since, the City has managed to pay back just one million of that principal $21 million issue. Has the City taken a page from the Obama playbook on debt spending? What shortsighted political recklessness does this portend? We expect better from our administration and elected officials. Sure, refinancing $20,000,000 of debt will save some money now; but if we had paid off that loan, we’d already have saved the money. (No doubt the City will understand the first part of that but not the second; whenever City Hall pays more instead of less it always seems ready to break its arm patting itself on the back, with a gusty heave of relief for having got off cheaply. We wonder again how it is they don’t get what the rest of us do so easily.) The City doesn’t even need to borrow the money now. The contract to build the Purdy Avenue garage provides the City until December 15, 2011 to finagle a funding stream plan for construction. Why not spend the time taking a hard look at the Parking Department, and maximizing all its revenue? And examining the projects done recently with these funds to see if some might be drawn away for more appropriate and pressing accounts. And finally, paying for new garage construction-costs with cash the parking department produces by being more efficient—and trying, for once, to include better parking zones, congestion-pricing and workable options for getting around town instead of under-utilized parking places that cost the City money. Accomplishing this, tho’, means the City seizing control of its own transportation destiny, something it seems ill-prepared and ill-equipped to do. But that’s what comes of having Commissioners Pothole and Wardheel in charge instead of leaders. Look here. There are already more than 16,000 public metered or garage parking spaces on Miami Beach. That’s more parking spots here than hotel rooms (14,000), and even more than there are yellow taxicabs in all of New York City (13,000)! If administration-types or elected officials still think we need MORE parking— instead of utilizing what we’ve got by integrating it with viable public transportation—then they ought to step aside and let Ms Redfern run the show. After all, she just showed them how to save the residents $6,000,000.00! www.sunpostweekly.com • SunPost Weekly • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • Page 9
BED RACE
MANIA
Photography by Photo by MagicalPhotos.com / Mitchell Zachs Grand Avenue and Commodore Plaza replaced cars with beds and welcomed visitors, residents and fans of bed racing to the streets of Coconut Grove. The Great Grove Bed Race was a huge success this past Sunday with over 35,000 people attending. Sunday’s events started with a packed Family Pajama Party on Virginia Street, featuring music, storytelling and an interactive obstacle course from Inferno’s Challenge. The attention turned down the block at 1 p.m. as a 27 member Flanagan High School marching band led the Pit Row Parade of decorated beds. Finally, the main event, a green flag waived as Grand Marshal Tony Kanaan, Indy 500 professional racer, called out “ladies and gentleman, tie your shoelaces and prepare those beds” and with his “ready, set, go” the 2010 races launched down the 1/8th-mile track on Grand Avenue, Coconut Grove. “A total of $20,000 was raised this year for local charities and our top beneficiaries the University of Miami Sleep Program and Alonzo Mourning Charities,” says Event Producer for the Grove Merchant Group, Daisy Lewis. “Not only did we meet our fundraising goal but we also managed to more than double our crowd attendance from 2009. This is a huge milestone for an event that’s only in its second year” adds Lewis. Thirty-two teams participated in this year’s bed race and while teams came all the way from Palm Beach and the Florida Keys, there must be something in the Grove Village water as champions in each division were homegrown. Sandbar and Grill’s female life guards brought bay watch beauty and speed to the track winning the women's division, while the Grove 5-0 patrolled the finish line in style as corporate division winners. Mixing it up this year, the women joined University of Miami champs to take first in the coed division, showing Title 9 does work...women are equal! Finally the fastest of the fast, The Grove Spot team stayed fueled up with their "Breakfast in Bed" and took the ultimate trophy winning the Men's division.
News
Boulevard Blues Street Repairs Wreak Havoc on Biscayne Boulevard Businesses Bottom Line By Josh Malina
A US-1 renovation project has hurt sales of businesses alongside Biscayne Blvd in the City of Miami, say storeowners. The roadway reconstruction project, which spans twenty blocks from NE 15th Street to NE 35th Terrace, will replace drainage systems and update curb ramps to meet national disability standards. Despite the project’s benefits, however, some business owners are not happy. Adam Meltzer, owner of The Daily Creative Food (US1 & NE 20th), said his restaurant sales are down fifteen to eighteen percent, which he attributes to frequent road closures. Neighboring business managers echo Meltzer’s complaints. “When you have to go through the
nightmare of streets being closed and park two blocks down, you find some place else to go,” said manager Alex Morales of Salad Creations (US1 and 19th St) which has also seen a decrease in sales. The Florida Department of Transportation, which is responsible for the project, acknowledges local business owners’ concerns. “The department
is trying to minimize overall impacts to the community as much as possible,” said Heather Leslie, a FDOT information officer. FDOT has directed project contractors to work in stages “to be able to reopen work zones as soon as possible,” and offers contractors an incentive for completing the project early—up to $1,000,000 if finished 100 days ahead of schedule—and a pay cut if they must work beyond the original contract time. The project represents the final piece of a larger reconstruction effort, the US1 corridor improvement program, which is scheduled to finish by August 2011. For some business owners, that date cannot come soon enough. “I have a lot of people that
don’t come anymore,” said Pascal André of Franck Provost salon (US1 and 20th St). André reports a twenty percent reduction in sales, as well as problems scheduling clients because they arrive late to their appointments. To mitigate the effects of the construction on local businesses, FDOT has increased roadside sig-
Page 12 • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • SunPost Weekly • www.sunpostweekly.com
nage to advertise the names of businesses affected by the construction. FDOT also sends emails to business owners advising them of planned street closures, although some businesses report that they do not receive these e-mails. This also effects the traffic flow all the way down Biscayne on both sides. With the continuoes lane changes and detours it slows traffic all the way from the Port of Miami to the 41st Street causeway to Miami Beach. Evenings are even more trouble with some sections of Biscayne closed down all together. Some customers interviewed for this story reported annoyance at construction, but did not consider it prohibitively inconvenient, especially if they arrived by foot. While others are staying away until
the work is finished. “It is such a hassle to drive down Biscayne, so I totally avoid that area at all costs. I take back roads if I need too. As far as shopping, I would love to stop, but parking is just to much of a hassle.” said Jackie Torres. Last Friday (Sept. 3rd), contractors broke a water main on US1 and NE 25th Street, sending a “precautionary boil water order” into effect, according to the Miami-Dade Water and Sewer Department. That ban has since been lifted. Beside drainage system updates, the project is set to improve curbs and gutters, upgrade lighting, traffic and pedestrian signs, and install new landscaping and irrigation.
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THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATRONAGE
Calendar WHAT TO DO IN MIAMI THIS WEEK
JENNY MCCARTHY
Page 14 • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • SunPost Weekly • www.sunpostweekly.com
his new book and sign copies. 8pm. Free. Books & Books, 265 Aragon Ave, Coral Gables. For info: booksandbooks.com.
September 10 FILM Cine! Catch the premiere of four Chilean films during Cine, the Chilean Film Festival. A full week dedicated to Chilean filmmaking, celebrating the bicentennial anniversary of the independence of Chile. Opening film is a comedy, The Gift. Also playing is Teresa, A Stop Away From (A Un Metro de Tí) and Red Eyes (Ojos Rojos). Part of the proceeds will be donated to the disaster relief effort to help the victims of the earthquake that affected Chile. $5-$6. Tower Theater, 1508 SW 8th St; Miami. For info: cine-festival.com
September 11 ART Wanderlust
September 9
Wanderlust, a solo exhibition by Kanako Sasaki opens this Saturday at the Dina Mitrani Gallery in Wynwood. In her photographic series Wanderlust, Sasaki explores an imaginative world influenced by traditional Japanese novels, Ukiyo-e paintings and childhood memories. Within her surreal and eccentric settings, Sasaki’s characters, usually herself, evoke ideas of isolation, escape and uninhibited freedom. Opening reception 7pm. Runs through October 30. Dina Mitrani Gallery, 2620 NW 2nd Ave, Miami. For info: dinamitranigallery.com or 786. 486. 7248.
MUSIC Fiesta Argentina International Thursdays arrive at Jazid with Fiesta Argentina. Experience a Live Tribute to the best of Rock Argentino by MiamiAlterLatino.com, Fue Pol and music by RomanSound, Soda Stereo, Pericos, Enanitos Verdes, Fabulosos Cadillacs, La Bersuit, Karamelo Santo, Los Cafres, La Renga, Gustavo Cerati, Los Piojos, Sumo, Andres Calamaro and Cumbia Villera. Jazid, 1342 Washington Ave; Miami Beach. For info: jazid.net
September 11 ART Great Masters Small Works
September 9
On exhibit at Gary Nadar is a gathering of small-format masterpieces from a diverse group of outstanding Latin American, Modern and Contemporary artists whose work reflects the interaction of innovative ideas, structure complexity, and connotation of scale in art: Pablo Atchugarry, Fernando Botero, Claudio Bravo, Cundo Bermudez, Agustin Cardenas, Mario Carreño, Marc Chagall, Salvador Dali, Walter Goldfarb, Eugenio Granell, Martin Kippenberger, Wifredo Lam, Julio Larraz, Enrique Martinez Celaya, Joan Miro, Yoshitomo Nara, Matta, Henry Matisse, Guillermo Muñoz Vera, Pablo Picasso, Pierre Auguste Renoir, Frank Stella, Francisco Toledo, Joaquin Torres-Garcia, Sofia Vari, among others. Reception 7-10pm. Free. Gary Nader Fine Art, 62 NE 27th Street, Miami. For info: garynader.com
COMEDY Steve Byrne In just a few short years, Steve Byrne has risen through the ranks of the comedy world to become one of the industry’s most innovative and sought-after performers. With his high-energy, physical style of comedy, Byrne has evolved into an extremely versatile entertainer that delivers on a day-to-day basis. Hailing from Pittsburgh, PA, Steve Byrne was born to a Korean mother and an Irish father, which continues to provide him with an inordinate wealth of comedic material. 8:30pm. $15. Miami Improv, 3390 Mary St, Coconut Grove. For info: improv.com
ABOVE: CESAR BARROSO, BIRDS IN FLIGHT AT THE BAKEHOUSE. LEFT: SOPHIA VARI ATHENS, GREECE B.1940 BLACK BIRD, 2001 AT GARY NADER FINE ART.
September 10 ART BAC Season Opening Join the 60+ artists of the Bakehouse Art Complex when they open their studios to the public. Live music from Peter Betan and an open wine bar. Free. 7pm. BAC: 561 NW 32nd Street Miami. For info: 305.576.2828 or bacfl.org.
September 10 BOOKS Jeff Lindsay America’s most-read, most-watched, and most beloved serial killer—Dexter Morgan—is back with Dexter is Delicious. After selling more than one million copies and inspiring the wildly popular Showtime series and top-rated crime drama on pay-cable television, New York Times bestselling author Jeff Lindsay returns with his most hilarious, macabre, and purely entertaining novel yet. The Miami author will read from
SAVE THE DATE: MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2010
SHAKIRA SHOW OFF YOUR WAKA WAKA DANCE WHEN SEXY SONGSTRESS SHAKIRA HITS MIAMI FOR A ONE-NIGHT, HAIR RAISING SHOW, MONDAY, SEP 27. SHAKIRA'S WORLD TOUR, WHICH BEGAN ON SEPTEMBER 15TH IN MONTREAL, HAS BEEN ROCKING STAGES ALL OVER THE U.S. TO SUPPORT THE RELEASE OF HER NEW ALBUM, SALE EL SOL/THE SUN COMES OUT, WHICH RELEASES ON OCTOBER 19TH. THE ALBUM WILL FEATURE SHAKIRA'S RECORD-BREAKING GLOBAL HIT "WAKA WAKA (THIS TIME FOR AFRICA)", AS WELL AS A NEW SINGLE "LOCA". RECORDED IN THE DOMINICAN REPUBLIC, “LOCA” IS SHAKIRA’S INTERPRETATION OF DOMINICAN ARTIST EL CATA’S SONG “LOCA CON SU TIGUERE". $13.90- $167.85. 8PM. AMERICAN AIRLINES ARENA, MIAMI. FOR INFO: LIVENATION.COM www.sunpostweekly.com • SunPost Weekly • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • Page 15
Calendar WHAT TO DO IN MIAMI THIS WEEK
STEVE BYRNE
September 11
September 14
ART Elusive Landscape
BOOKS Jenny McCarthy
Multiple hand-crafted 16mm films depicting the forms and colors of natural landscapes will be projected directly onto the foliage for Elusive Landscape, a live art installation from Miami artist Dinorah de Jesús Rodríguez. Elusive Landscape promotes environmental awareness and connects the city’s diverse audiences and neighborhoods by engaging everyday people with an experience that is sensorial, magical, celebratory and rooted in nature, and by presenting similar events across the city so that it becomes a shared, unifying experience. Music will be provided by composer and sound designer Ricardo Lastre. 9pm. Free. Miami Beach Botanical Garden, at 2000 Convention Center Drive in Miami Beach. For info: mbgarden.org
September 12
In Jenny McCarthy’s fourth book, Love, Lust, and Faking It, McCarthy turns the lights on for a funny, noholds-barred look at the essence of relationships: love and sex. McCarthy talks about finding first love and dealing with heartbreak; the importance of playing doctor and other nice and naughty fantasies; becoming a Playboy Miss October; why women are master manipulators and so much more. Tickets are required for this event and are available at all Books & Books locations. Purchase the book to receive one ticket to this evening of cocktails and candid conversation with Jenny McCarthy. Cash bar opens at 6pm. Epic Hotel, 270 Biscayne Blvd. Way, Miami. For info: booksandbooks.com.
FESTIVAL Fall For the Arts
September 14
100 non-profit arts and community service organizations will be a part of Fall For the Arts, an event that showcases the best of Miami’s arts organizations and community service agencies. Performances throughout the day on two stages; gourmet food vendors, curated by the Burger Beast; on-site workshops and seminars; and family-friendly activities. Coinciding with the festival, a starstudded selection of more than 50 shows will be on sale for the very first time, and available for purchase. Latino funk band Ozomatli will headline. 12pm. Free. Arsht Center, 1300 Biscayne Blvd; Miami. For info: arshtcenter.org
September 12
SOCIAL Speed Dating Meet someone special at a Speed Dating Event for Single Professionals. PreDating is a fun, no pressure way for busy professionals to meet. Recent research shows that the chemistry between two people occurs within the first few minutes of meeting. With Pre-Dating you go on many dates in one evening. You can quickly determine who you would truly like to hear from again. It’s fun and convenient. 7pm. All Single Professionals, Ages 24-34, $29. Blue Martini, 900 South Miami Ave, Miami. For info: pre-dating.com
FOR KIDS
MUSIC Chopin’s 200th Celebrate the 200th anniversary of the birth of Frederick Chopin with a magical evening of music, food and drink to help talented but underprivileged children. The Sobe Arts concert will feature renowned concert pianist Robert Chumbley, in performances of Nocturnes, polonaises, Preludes, Ballads and other Chopin masterpieces. Special appearance by SoBe Arts scholarship student, Angel Perez. Seating is very limited. $50. 5pm. Steinway Gallery, 4104 Ponce de Leon Blvd., Coral Gables. For info: 305-6749220 or sobearts.org
ABOVE: ELUSIVE LANDSCAPE. MIDDLE: OZOMATLI AT FALL FOR THE ARTS. RIGHT: JEFF LINDSAY’S NEW BOOK DEXTER IS DELICIOUS.
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Sunday, September 12 Fall For the Arts Festival, Kiddie Style PART OF THE FUN-FILLED FALL FOR THE ARTS DAY IS A WHOLE SLEW OF KIDDIE ACTIVITIES. FAMILY-FRIENDLY FUN HAS BEEN BOOKED, INCLUDING FOLKLORIC DANCE AND MUSIC FROM PERU EXPRESION AND PARTICIPATORY BREAK-DANCING LED BY THE FLIPSIDE KINGS. FAMILY-FRIENDLY ACTIVITIES FOR CHILDREN AND FAMILIES WILL INCLUDE ALL-DAY MOVEMENT AND ACTING WORKSHOPS, FACE-PAINTING AND, IN CELEBRATION OF THE SEPTEMBER 16 OPENING OF PANDEMONIUM: THE LOST AND FOUND ORCHESTRA – A SPECIAL CRAFT CORNER WHERE KIDS WILL BE ABLE TO MAKE THEIR OWN “LOST AND FOUND” INSTRUMENTS! FREE. 12PM. ARSHT CENTER, 1300 BISCAYNE BLVD; MIAMI. FOR INFO: ARSHTCENTER.ORG
www.sunpostweekly.com • SunPost Weekly • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • Page 17
Social
Cinema REVIEW
Festival Misses By Ruben Rosario (ruben@sunpostweekly.com) Cinephiles consider the start of the Toronto Film Festival in early September as the kickoff for the fall movie season, and it’s around this time awards-hungry indie labels and studio specialty divisions begin releasing prestige titles that gained international fame making the rounds at packed screenings in cities like Berlin, Venice and Park City. In some cases, though, the films in question fail to live up to the hype outside the buzz-building world that turned them into word-of-mouth hits. This weekend, two festival favorites finally seeing their South Florida debut exemplify what I like to call dashed expectations. Take, for instance, the winner of the Golden Lion at last year’s Venice Film Festival. Lebanon takes an unblinking look at that Middle Eastern conflict in June 1982 from the point of view of four Israeli soldiers carrying out a mission their commander assured them would be a cakewalk. The film starts with a lovely shot of a sunflower field in full bloom; the rest of the film takes place in the cramped confines of the tank where our young protagonists will have their loss of innocence. Director Samuel Maoz wants the viewer to feel the claustrophobia and paranoia his characters experience, but I felt trapped for a very different reason: These snot-nosed brats would not quit whining. The gunman has passive aggressive tendencies. The driver has a hissy fit when his dials don’t respond. And when the enemy begins firing at them, one of them starts crying like a little girl. All that’s missing from the scene would have been him asking for his mother—oops, I spoke too soon. “I want my mo-mmeeeee,” he whimpers. It doesn’t help matters that Maoz displays all the subtlety of a sledgehammer. Passing through a debris-strewn street, the soldiers spot a dying donkey. Cue to a closeup of the animal’s eyes…there’s tears in them! When their superiors store a dead soldier in the tank, one of the soldiers helps put him inside. Then he looks down at his hands; they’re covered in blood. The blood…it’s in his haaaands! Oh, the humanity! This is territory that was much better navigated by filmmaker Ari Folman in his Oscar-nominated animation/nonfiction hybrid Waltz with Bashir. In that film he was able to convey the rudderless chaos of the Lebanese War. The self-importance in Lebanon just makes it call attention to itself. It should have been renamed Arabs Are Shooting at Me…WAAAAAAHHH!! Check back with me when you’ve matured, Mr. Maoz. You big crybaby. On paper, Animal Kingdom seems like a knockout, a gritty portrait of a family whose bread and butter involves robbing banks, dealing drugs, and just being all-around scumbags. The Australian crime thriller has a ton of accolades under its belt, more recently taking Sundance by storm earlier this
year. (The film picked up the Grand Jury Prize in the festival’s World Cinema section.) So why did it feel like an unending snoozefest to me? Blame newcomer James Frecheville, whose voiceover narration saturates the beginning of the film and is then abruptly dropped by writer-director David Michôd, who makes his feature debut. Frecheville sleepwalks through the role of Joshua (nicknamed J), a sullen, disaffected teen who becomes reacquainted with his shady relatives after his junkie mother dies from a heroin overdose. There’s Uncle Craig (Sullivan Stapleton, looking like Paul Walker gone to seed), the drug dealer who’s the family’s biggest breadwinner. His idea of fun? Giving his nephew a gun to go scare off some thugs who entered a staring contest with him while they sit in traffic. There’s Uncle Pope (Ben Mendelsohn), the oldest, an armed robber hiding from the police. If he looks at you funny, be very afraid. There’s Barry (The Waiting City’s Joel Edgerton, quite appealing), Pope’s associate and an honorary family member, who plans to get out of the business by investing in stocks. By far the film’s most interesting character is J’s grandmother Smurf (Jacki Weaver, channeling Karen Black on a bender), the queen bee whose warmth masks a cold-blooded survival instinct. Expect her name to be bandied about come Oscar season. Michôd, who co-wrote the clever 2007 short Spider, walks down those mean streets many gifted directors have explored in better films. His is a Darwinian world of crooks who are bad to the bone and policemen who are even more morally bankrupt, but Animal Kingdom just lies there, even with the welcome appearance of Guy Pearce, who sports a Ned Flanders mustache as one of the only police officers with an ounce of integrity. As the body count rose, I found my personal investment waning. “It’s just a bad situation for everyone,” Smurf observes. No kidding, Grandma. The antidote for these letdowns? A blast of Mexploitation from Robert Rodriguez, of course. A feature-length version of the first fake trailer in Grindhouse, Machete is bloody fun and, best of all, gives leatherLEBANON faced character actor Danny Trejo, usually stuck playing bad guys, his own movie. As a former Mexican Federale left for dead after being betrayed by his own partner, Machete becomes the unlikely hero of the current immigra-
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ALL OF THE CONTESTANTS AWAIT THE RESULTS OF THE COMPETITION. MACHETE
tion debate after he’s hired to bump off the rightwing senator (Robert De Niro, having a ball with his Texan drawl) who’s lobbying for the construction of an electrified border fence. More double crosses ensue (please don’t ask how he escapes from a hospital…okay, it involves using human intestines like a rope), and he finds himself teaming up with a US marshal (Jessica Alba, finally playing a Latina) and the leader of an underground revolutionary army posing as a taco stand vendor (Michelle Rodriguez, doing some grade-A ass kicking). This is exactly the movie The Expendables should have been, and Rodriguez, who made a big splash in Toronto back in 1992 with El Mariachi, finds gruesomely inventive uses for all kinds of sharp objects (nope, I don’t think I’ve seen a corkscrew used quite that way). I wish the movie, which Rodriguez co-directed with longtime editing assistant Ethan Maniquis, had maintained the momentum of the first forty-five minutes, though. The midsection is flabby, and the climactic showdown is, let’s face it, a bit of a mess. But how can you resist a movie that has Robert De Niro using a taxicab as a getaway vehicle? Or that features Lindsay Lohan packing heat while wearing a nun’s habit? Machete ain’t perfect, but the inspired cheap thrills it serves up put a goofy grin on my face. And these days, that’s surprisingly hard to find. Animal Kingdom and Lebanon are now showing at Regal South Beach Cinemas; for more information go to fandango.com. Machete is currently in wide release. Since it was shot in high definition, my advice would be to seek out the theaters that are screening it on digital projection.
Hard Rock Hosts Talent Show By Marguerite Gil Hard Rock Café Hosts 2nd Annual “Talent Show-Down” Seven of Miami’s best kept talents, entertained crowds at the Hard Rock in Bayside recently and… trust this jaded arts writer…it was an awesome display of amazing talent. Business organizations introduced local singers to over 400 “Arts” guests who enjoyed yummy treats, beverages and an evening of great voices that are blooming, right here in South Florida. Singers included: Mike Colucci who sang “Wonderwall” by Oasis; Quintin Davis, hit the high notes with “a Change is Gonna Come” by Sam Cook while Patrick Harris crooned to the tune of “Anything But Mine” by Kenny Chesney. After a pause and some moments of stage presence by Yaffa Mizrachi, event Co-coordinator, the show continued with a rendition of Tamia’s “Stranger in my House” sung by Jei was followed by Paula Abdul’s “Straight Up” interpreted by Stephanie Llamas. Boy wonder (who in my opinion will give Justin Bieber a run for his money), Nick NICK MERICO Merico, amazed the crowd with “Faithfully” by Journey. Lastly Paula Zuleta wowed everyone with her voice and dancing performance. There was also a great rendition of “Respect” by Natalia Sulca who is the 2009 Talent Show-Down Winner and who is sight impaired. Nick Merico won the competition. He’s 14-years-old, American Heritage School student whose recent accomplishments include grand prize winner of the South Florida Fair “Starz of the Future” Teen Singing competition, grand prize winner of the American Idol Experience at Hollywood Studios in Orlando, and grand prize winner of America TeVE, channel 41 singing competition in Miami. Hey America…Miami’s Got TALENT!
Art
a
ROBERT PLANT
COLUMN
Workscape... Works By Marguerite Gil
WorkScape is a woman owned business that focuses on the community and the environment. WorkScape also provides designs, ergonomic advancements and environmental benefits in Office Furniture, Modular Walls, Floors, Electrical Solutions and an array of other services that will make your work area pleasurable and comfortable. They offer an unparalleled design spectrum that will guide you through finding the right office systems which include seating, files and storage, tables and desks, wood case goods, textiles and accessories. Many of their products are composed of recyclable goods and materials that are conscientious of the ecosystem. Now all of this is serious stuff. But professional women also know how to party and recently they asked Designers and Architects in South Florida to “Design Martini Glasses” Martini Glasses are my specialty. The proof is that I was the first-prize winner of this most ingeniously designed competition. As a writer and an artist, I say Bravo to myself (and my Martini Glass) and to the other competitors. As a person who enjoys adult beverages I think, “Why aren’t there more creative places organizing fun competitions like the one WorkScape organized?” Cheers to the outstanding women who create delicious reasons to party. Works for me!
Music Kings Of Leon – Major Success From Day One By Alan Sculley Is there such a thing as too much popularity? As the Kings Of Leon’s 2008 CD, “Only by the Night” was taking off in the United States, singer Caleb Followill was thinking he was going to get the answer. And he wouldn’t like what he saw. “For the most part, I was scared to death when we got off the road, I thought we wouldn’t be able to go anywhere without people recognizing us and stuff,” Caleb Followill said in a recent teleconference interview. “But somehow, some way, we’ve seemed to manage to get under the radar just enough to where we just made another album and people don’t really even realize it. “So I don’t think that the things that we were scared about have necessarily come to pass just yet,” he said. That, of course, could change once the band’s next CD, “Come Around Sundown,” comes out on Oct. 19. Recording was finished by the time Kings Of Leon went on tour this summer. And the band members were hearing from some advisors that they shouldn’t play the new songs this summer, and save them instead for after the CD was released. But Jared Followill, who was on the teleconference call with his brother, Caleb, said he doubted Kings Of Leon would be able to heed that advice. “Whenever we write a song, we like to play it,” he said. “But now that we’ve had the success of the last album, people want there to be this mystery about what’s coming next. But I hate to burst their bubble, I’m pretty sure we’ll be playing a lot of stuff on the road. “I mean, we want to enjoy the concert as much as everyone else, and for us to go out there and play “Molly’s Chambers” and “Sex on Fire” and stuff like that, that we played so many times, that is not going to get us as excited as seeing their faces when we debut a new song,” Jared Followill said. The Followill brothers stayed somewhat vague when it came to describing the music on the next CD. They did, however, address one description that had made news just two days earlier, after bassist Nathan Followill, in a teleconference interview to promote the bands show at June’s Bonnaroo festival, used the word “beachy” to describe some of the new songs. That wasn’t exactly the kind of sound that would be expected from a band known for gritty Southern-tinged
rock, such a Kings Of Leon, but Caleb Followill sought to put things in perspective, needling his brother a little bit in the process. “Sorry, the person that said that was Nathan and we haven’t even let him hear the album yet, so he has no idea,” the singer quipped. “No, there are definitely times when it’s very tropical and beachy, but there is always that dark chord in there that makes it Kings of Leon.” He then elaborated further on the new CD. “This album, we have fiddle on this album and we have lap steel on this album, trumpet, and all kinds of stuff,” Caleb Followill said. “We are really trying to make these songs live up to what it is that we want them to be, so there are a lot of elements that you may have never heard on Kings of Leon. But there are also a lot of elements that were on the early Kings of Leon demos. “I mean from day one, these are things that we’ve been kind of doing, but we’ve always held back a little bit,” he said. “And you know, I’m going for it vocally, we are all going for it. We will see what people think, but we are very proud of it.” Many observers feel the Kings Of Leon’s sound has grown by leaps and bounds on the two most recent CDs – shifting beyond the rather straight-ahead Southern rooted rock of the band’s acclaimed first CD, “Youth & Young Manhood,” to embrace a more spacious, more epic and ambitious range of music – especially on the 2007 CD, “Because of the Times” and on “Only by the Night.” The critical acclaim never translated to big sales in the states until “Only by the Night” ” became a breakthrough hit behind chart-topping singles like “Sex On Fire” “Use Somebody” and “Notion.” It was a different story in the United Kingdom and Europe, where Kings Of Leon had major success from day one. Caleb Followill still struggles to explain why fans in England and Europe connected with Kings Of Leon so much sooner than those in America. “Jesus, that’s kind of tough,” he said. “We’re still scratching our head over that and I think, initially, it was the UK that really jumped on the hype of the new rock and roll revolution or whatever, with the Strokes and the White Stripes. And so they were kind of looking for any other band that was out there. We just happened to be one that they attached themselves to.”
www.sunpostweekly.com • SunPost Weekly • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • Page 19
The 411
W Hotel South Beach Belkys Nerey and Jose Ortiz
COLUMN
Season’s Best 2010 - Part ll By Mary Jo Almeida-Shore maryjoshore@sunpostweekly.com
This week we continue our guide to the best Miami has to offer in the words of some of the city’s top tastemakers. If you missed Season’s Bests 2010 Part I- be sure to read the story at Sunpostweekly.com. Check back next week for even more great recommendations.
Moderate/inexpensive Restaurant “T-Mex (formerly San Loco) – has the best tacos anytime day or night. Eva Longoria turned me on to it and it’s always a late night stop.”
Daytime Leisure Activity Bar 721
LOREN RIDINGER, SENIOR VICE PRESIDENT, MARKET AMERICA Nightclub/lounge/bar “LIV- I love LIV because it’s gorgeous and the music is great. Of course Dave Grutman is such a fabulous host and makes it even more fun…especially when he lets me DJ.”
Hotel “The W hotel is sexy, they have a great pool and I love to lunch there as well. The whole place is gorgeous and the people are always beautiful there. Of course my favorite thing about it is Mr. Chow, which I love, and is one of the most beautiful restaurants anywhere.”
My favorite stores include the Webster, Oxygen, Curve, Intermix and Dash Miami. Dash has great finds, plus I love supporting my friends Kim, Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian and they really take the time to put things in the store that they really love. I love going to lunch on the weekends at Carpaccio. I think it’s a long time fave of many and the food is delicious- and you can run into everyone at one place. Of course on the weekends I love to just hang out with my friends on Utopia 3. That is always the best and the most peaceful for me. I love Miami Beach because of the water and the people, and with Utopia 3, I get to enjoy both.”
JOSE ORTIZ, EDITOR, OCEAN DRIVE MAGAZINE Nightclub/lounge/bar
Expensive Restaurant “STK- The bone in rib eye is to die for and the music and ambiance are amazing. You don’t have to go anywhere else; it’s like having dinner and going to a club all in one. I love that- it’s just smart! I also love the new Forge Restaurant. Shareef has been one of my best friends for years and just makes every experience there the best, from start to finish. I love the lobster peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, they are unique and yummy. Casa Tua is intimate and serves great food and I love eating in the club upstairs. Miki is a great friend and we love going there.”
“La Fee Verte, is my favorite new space. I’m involved because I think it’s a unique, wonderland of pleasure and entertainment that I couldn’t resist and neither will you. I’m also a fan of Coco De Ville and Bardot.”
Hotel: “Whether for dinner, lounging or raging at The Wall, it doesn’t get any better than the W Hotel.”
Expensive Restaurant: “The Forge is simply delicious and BLT is to die for.”
Elaine Lancaster
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Erin Newberg interviews Matt Hein
Moderate/inexpensive Restaurant “Burger & Beer Joint has it all and is surprisingly a great date spot.”
DJ Soul at LIV
Amy Zakarin
ton South Beach (hands down). Ask for Sean to serve you. He’s the best. I also love to stay close to home on the weekend since my week has most likely been hyper social.”
Expensive Restaurant
Daytime Leisure Activity “Standard- love hanging out by the pool and cocktailing with friends.”
in the facility, from amazing dining at Solea, to great garden areas for chill time. There’s also a huge glam pool and it’s right on the beach!”
Elaine’s Honorable Mentions:
Solea
Best Mani/Pedi: Nails 111
Moderate/inexpensive Restaurant
BELKYS NEREY, WSVN-7 NEWS ANCHOR Best hair style and color: Nightclub/lounge/bar
ORIBE
“721 - Simply put it’s just an easy hang out. No attitude, no list, no drama, no overpriced drinks.”
Best Botox and facials:
“Off the beaten path in Wynwood, I like Fratelli Lyon and Joey’s (amazing octopus). Also for a great light lunch, I say go to Go Go- a fantastic fast operation where you won’t damage your wallet or your figure!”
Dr. Julio Gallo at The Miami Institute at the Four Seasons
Hotel: “ONE Bal Harbour — so chic and laid back. The perfect place for some peace and quiet but still sexy!”
Best Dentist:
Expensive Restaurant:
HADLEY HENRIETTE, MANAGING EDITOR, 944 MAGAZINE MIAMI
“Scarpetta - who knew spaghetti, could taste so good? And you can’t beat the view if you eat outside.”
Dr. Julio Hernandez
Daytime Leisure activity “Of course, my perfect day includes food and shopping! Love the 5th street area- Barneys and Intermix always have good sales. A fashionista with 4 closets like me needs to find a way to not go bankrupt and look fab! I LOVE the Alchemist on Lincoln Road, and when it comes to a good vintage find, I ALWAYS recommend Wynwood’s Angels Vintage Boutique (north of Fratelli Lyon) has incredible selections from every era.”
Moderate/inexpensive Restaurant
“The W South Beach is the coolest new hotel, if I didn’t live here, I’d stay there.”
AMY ZAKARIN, PRESIDENT/OWNER ZAKARIN PUBLIC RELATIONS
“Sugarcane - the menu offers something for everybody. The service is always great and the people watching never disappoints.”
Expensive Restaurant
Hotel
Daytime Leisure Activity
“Hakkasan blows me away, but there are a LOT of really good, really pricey places in this town.”
“En Avance is the best for shopping. Karen Quinones, the owner, has great taste and always keeps it fresh.”
“Tempo Miami is a new hotel located in the heart of downtown’s sophisticated culture of business, art and style savvy. It’s like being in a New York hotel, but with the most unbelievable views of Miami from all directions. “
Moderate/inexpensive Restaurant
Hotel
“I love Indomania and Mai Tardi - they’re both good deals.”
ELAINE LANCASTER, INTERNATIONAL SOCIALITE
“Nobu has the best sushi in town.”
Daytime Leisure activity “I’m always by my pool on weekends, putzing in the garden.”
Nightclub/lounge/bar SET, Rose Bar at Delano
ERIN NEWBERG, SOCIALITE, TV PERSONALITY
Hotel The Setai, Ritz Carlton South Beach, Four Seasons on Brickell Avenue
Nightclub/lounge/bar
Joe’s Stone Crab, Smith & Wollensky, Soyka at the 55th Street Station has good food, good service and fantastic iced tea
“Although I’m not into the whole drinking scene, I always LOVE a good night out here and there! When it comes to nightclubs, I vote for Wall at the W hotel. They play great music on Friday nights and there’s always a blasting AC, which keeps a good Jewish girl from sweating in public! When it comes to lounges, I love Casa Tua upstairs. It is very intimate, with great art and a very classy local and international crowd. For a bar scene, the Room, south of 5th, is very cozy; a very eclectic and eccentric choice for the low key night!”
Daytime Leisure Activity
Hotel
“I love poolside weekends at the Standard, the best brunch is at the Ritz Carl-
“The W has the BEST ART, is so gorgeous, spacious, and has endless options
Expensive Restaurant Prime 112, Hakkasan, Mr. Chow
Moderate/inexpensive Restaurant
Expensive Restaurant
Moderate/inexpensive Restaurant “Panorama at Sonesta Coconut Grove is a surprising and delicious spot for Peruvian fare. It’s located on the 8th floor of the hotel, so it feels like you’re floating amid Sailboat Bay, which always is so perfectly populated by boats. It creates an inviting atmosphere and scene. There are tables along the pool’s glass terrace, amazing for lunch or sunset dinner. Panorama has THE best ceviche, salads, fish, wine, etc.”
Daytime Leisure activity “I love going to The Standard for lunch when the weather is nice for amazing organic food, and I can take my dogs. Any place that welcomes dogs is top of my list. Sonesta Coconut Grove is equally terrific for a relaxing lunch, then a movie at the new Paragon Theater or shopping at the organic market on Saturdays.”
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411
Opening of the Bombay Sapphire Lounge at the Adrienne Arsht Center Austin Cohen & Aaron Glickman
John Richard, President & CEO, Adrienne Arsht Center, with Sanford and Dolores Ziff at the Bombay Sapphire Lounge opening
Jillian Sanz at the party for Bombay Sapphire Lounge
Susie and Walid Wahab at the Adrienne Arsht Center party
Marvin Ross Friedman, Adrianne Bon Haes, Woody and Judy Weiser
John Richard and Chair-Elect Mike Eidson celebrate the opening
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Paige Dygert, Debra Von Habsburg, Terri Doud
Adrienne Arsht Center Board Member Adriana Sabino & guest
GO! UPCOMING SOCIAL EVENTS
Lots of Stuff to Do By Maryanne Salvat and Mary jo Almeida-Shore maryannsalvat@aol.com
ARTS & CRAFTS SERIES AT BUCK15: ROUND 2 South Beach’s favorite hidden bar continues its local art contest this September with sneakers sponsored by Puma. Locals are encouraged to pick up a white Puma sneaker and decorate it any way they wish. Artists have until the 13th of September to hand in their sneakers that will be displayed on the walls of Buck15 along with voting cards throughout the month. Buck15 patrons will have up until the 28th of September to vote for their favorite piece. The winners will be announced that Tuesday evening at 11:30 p.m. First place winner will be awarded a $75 gift certificate to La Epoca Department Store located at 200 East Flagler Street in Downtown; second place winner will receive a $75 bar comp at Buck15 to be used by October 28; third place winner will receive a $25 Miss Yip gift certificate. To participate, contact Cesar@Buck15.net or buck15.net.
SEPTEMBER IS OVARIAN CANCER AWARENESS MONTH The Melanie Finley Ovarian Cancer Foundation (MFOCF) is hosting an inaugural awareness week September 13 17th, sponsored by 123 Lumpsum, featuring a variety of social events to celebrate survivors while raising awareness and donations to fight the disease. On Monday, September 13th, from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. enjoy complimentary martinis and makeovers in addition to a 10% discount on all beauty products with a portion of proceeds benefitting MFOCF. The event is free and open to the public at GBS, The Beauty Store 31 N. Federal Highway in Ft. Lauderdale. On Tuesday, September 14th, from 6 to 8 p.m., wine and dine at a private east Fort Lauderdale residence with live entertainment for $20 per person with proceeds benefitting MFOCF. There will be a presentation by Dr. Steven Poliakoff M.D., M.B.A., Finley’s doctor and the founder and CEO of South Florida Gynecologic Oncology Associates, Inc. and Executive Medical Director of The Women’s Cancer Research Foundation. For additional information, contact: info@mfocf.com or jen@wasie.org. On Wednesday, September 15th, from 6:00 to 7:45 p.m. celebrate National Yoga Month and Ovarian Cancer Month at Ayama Yoga in Aventura with a 90-minute Vinyasa class. A $10 donation will be made to the MFOCF for every student in attendance. Students of all levels are encouraged to participate and experience the many benefits of yoga including improved health, posture, strength, balance and flexibility. The cost of the class is $18. Complimentary refreshments provided by Honest Tea will be available after class. Ayama Yoga Center is located at2624 N.E. 188th St., North Miami Beach. Free parking is available.
Allison Weiss Brady and Jill Viner along with De Beers will be hosting an exclusive preview of the new De Beers Talisman Collection. Guests are invited to an evening of shopping, diamonds, and champagne, benefiting Gene Spotlight. To RSVP go to FNOBalHarbourShops@debeers.com or 305.867.7100 Miami socialites Dana Shear and Vivianne Kurzweil along with VH1’s NBA Housewives Evelyn Lozado and lifestyle editor Jacquelynn Powers will host Trina Turk’s fashion celebration. Customers are invited to enjoy cupcakes and champagne, and enter for the chance to win exclusive raffle prizes and to purchase the official Fashion’s Night Out tshirt and tank – to benefit the NYC AIDS Fund. RSVP: TrinaTurk@taraink.com.
Village of Merrick Park Village of Merrick Park will host an official Fashion’s Night Out event that will take place throughout the center as well as in participating retailers. Event components will include a Fashion’s Night Out Lounge which will feature cool music, light bites provided by SAWA Restaurant & Lounge, informal modeling and a sneak peak of Fall 2010 trends as well as many other exciting initiatives. Guests will enjoy complimentary cocktails provided by Belvedere Vodka & Atlantico Rum, as well as a coffee station provided by CafÊ Bustelo. Patrons will be able to capture their Fashion’s Night Out experience by receiving a complimentary professional picture with any purchase of $25 or more from any retailer throughout the center. Fashion’s Night Out participants will include Neiman Marcus, Nordstrom, Diane von Furstenberg, Jimmy Choo and Etro. For more information visit www.villageofmerrickpark.com/events/fashions-night-out
Saks Fifth Avenue Dadeland Saks Fifth Avenue Dadeland has invited four charities (American Red Cross, Baptist Hospital Foundation, Big Brothers Big Sisters, and Humane Society of Greater Miami) to participate in a night of shopping that will benefit these charities and give back to the community. As part of the promotion to celebrate fashion, Saks Dadeland is giving a Monique Lhuillier evening gown informal modeling presentation to showcase this fall season’s beautiful dresses. The evening will begin on the ground floor with a Rock Out and Make Up event, which will feature tips and tricks to looking like a rock star. Enjoy a sampling of fall must-haves that promise to be cult favorites. The Spa at Mandarin Oriental, Miami will be offering five-minute neck massages and raffling off a gift certificate to The Spa. The event will be accompanied by a champagne reception provided by Moet & Chandon and Morton’s The Steakhouse will be serving light hors d’oeuvres throughout the informal fashion presentation on the second floor. The event will also have dueling Dj’s and a book signing by Margarita Zingg, author of Glamour para Llevar. Miami Magazine is Saks Dadeland’s media partner for this event. Shop with your MasterCardŽ card the evening of September 10th and receive an exclusive Fashion’s Night Out rock ‘n’ roll playlist. For further information, visit the the Saks Fifth Avenue Dadeland Facebook page for an updated event schedule.
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On Thursday, September 16th, from 6:30 to 9 p.m., enjoy a fashion fundraising soiree at Lilac And Lilies new boutique across from the Galleria Mall. Twenty percent of proceeds from sales will benefit MFOCF. Shop star-studded styles including Nicole Richie’s House of Harlow 1960 jewelry collection, Trina Turk, J Brand denim, Black Halo, Alex & Ani accessories and MM Couture. The event is free and open to the public. Lilac & Lilies, 2541 East Sunrise Boulevard, Ft. Lauderdale. On Friday, September 17th, head to SHO Nightclub from 8:00 to 10 p.m., make a $30 donation to the MFOCF, and enjoy 2 complimentary cocktails and appetizers and then dance the night away at Ft. Lauderdale’s premier, upscale nightclub. SHO Nightclub is located at 15 West Las Olas Boulevard in Ft. Lauderdale.
MERCADITO MIDTOWN In honor of the 200 years of Mexico’s independence from Spanish rule, and 100 years of its revolution that began in 1910, Mercadito Midtown celebrates “El Grito de La Independencia� with authentic Mexican cuisine by Chef Patricio Sandoval in a lively, festive ambiance. In addition to the restaurant’s a la carte menu, holiday offerings will include succulent cochinita tacos ($16), made with achiote marinated pork belly, sour orange, pickled onions, and chiles en nogada ($22); a traditional Mexican specialty dish featuring stuffed poblano, pork, beef, dried fruit, spices, walnut sauce and pomegranate seeds, that will be available on the menu during the entire month of September. Mexican Independence Day festivities get underway at 5:00 p.m. on Wednesday, September 15. A live Mariachi band will perform from 9 to 11 p.m. Guests will be able to order their favorite Mercadito cocktails, created by the Tippling Bros., at the bar indoors or at a special outdoor bar. Mercadito Midtown is located at 3252 NE 1st Avenue, in Miami’s Midtown Neighborhood. Valet and municipal parking is available. Reservations are suggested at (786) 3690430; mercaditorestaurants.com.
FASHION’S NIGHT OUT: SEPTEMBER 10 FROM 7 TO 10 P.M. Bal Harbour Emmy Award winning journalist Maria Celeste Arraras, actress and model Paola Turbay and Miami philanthropist and socialite Kelly Gold will host Chloe’s in-store shopping and fundraising event benefitting Rally for Kids, a non-profit organization providing critical funds for care, treatment and research for children suffering with cancer. Guests will enjoy live beats, champagne by Louis Roederer and hors d’oeuvres while perusing Chloe’s Autumn/Winter 2010 ready-to-wear collection. RSVP: chloe@taraink.com or 305.864.3434 x 300.
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www.sunpostweekly.com • SunPost Weekly • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • Page 23
Sex COLUMN
Measurements Matter By Dr. Sonjia Kenya
Sonjia@drsonjia.com
ARE YOU SATISFIED WITH YOUR SIZE? Yep, I’m referring to the main male organ, but that’s not all we’re talking about. As an equal opportunist, it wouldn’t be fair to focus solely on heterosexual men. So today’s discussion will also explore feelings about the size of a woman’s special spot. And since straight sex isn’t the norm for many Miamians, we’ll analyze the impact of size on anal intercourse. Bet you can’t wait to open up this can of worms. First things first – what did the people say? I did not find one person in Miami who thinks size does NOT matter. Many agreed that size wasn’t everything, and certainly not the most important aspect of good sex. However, every single person indicated that the size of the sex organ was a serious influence on sexual satisfaction. A 46 year old female love coach (yes, we all hang out together) living in Brickell said, “I used to think size doesn’t matter until I was with someone who was so small I couldn’t even feel him inside me. I think he had a micropenis.” Or perhaps she had an extra-large vagina? Either way, men and women in Miami claim the micropenis is much more common than you think. A micropenis is exactly what it sounds like, a penis that is microscopically small. To be scientific, it is about 2.5 standard deviations smaller than the average penis and in most cases, works normally in terms of reproductive functions. This week, I spoke to three gay men and two heterosexual women who indicated they slept with a man who had a micropenis. I was so surprised because my social surveys are based on small convenience samples of whomever I happen to come across. Before moving to Miami, I never met one person who had experience with a micropenis and now I know five! One handsome interior decorator even called himself a mini-penis magnet, and complained of dating three different men with teeny, tiny, toys. So, what does a guy with a super small soldier
do? Until the late 1970s, many with a micropenis underwent gender reassignment. Yes, you understood correctly. They were injected with hormones and socialized as females. As you assumed, this was not a smashing success. Some grew up confused about their sexual identity and a few fellows ended up killing themselves long after everyone assumed they’d adjusted appropriately as females. Eventually the medical community recognized that gender identity isn’t easily altered and hormone therapy became the next course of action. Nowadays, testosterone treatment is often administered to help a micopenis grow. This usually does boost growth but not enough to develop into a normal sized penis (which by the way is not as big as you think, but we’ll get to that later). Penile enlargement surgery is the next most popular option for the little guy that doesn’t grow big enough to prevent suicide in his master. A spectrum of lengthening and widening surgeries are available for those with a micropenis and anyone else who isn’t satisfied with their natural size. From fat grafts to inflatable implants, most of the procedures involve at least two surgeries because after the penis is altered, pubic liposuction is recommended to makes the results look more noticeable. And of course you want everyone to notice your new look. Speaking of which, it’s important to realize that the head of the penis doesn’t change size during surgery. So your new look may reflect a wider or longer penis but the head will stay exactly the same size. For optimal results, stretching exercises are advised after the procedure and of course complications may occur. Loss of sensation, inability to achieve or sustain an erection, and uncontrollable hard-ons are common after surgery. Men looking for a non-surgical way to expand their options have found limited success using penis pumps and stretching exercises. Pumps are easily available and basically act as a suction cup around the penis. Although many advertise that pumps enlarge the organ, researchers are still not convinced
Page 24 • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • SunPost Weekly • www.sunpostweekly.com
that it works wonders. Pumps are also pretty useful for male masturbation, so at least it’s not a total waste of cash if it doesn’t dramatically increase size. Stretching is another alternative to enlarge the penis. Studies published in the International Journal of Impotence Research and the British Journal of Urology found that attaching an extender device on the penis to exert a constant traction significantly lengthened and widened penis size among men who were dissatisfied with their natural size. Like all exercise, a person must perform regularly to get results and the most significant changes were seen in those who stretched their mini-man most often. I promised to stay balanced and have already talked too much about the male organ. So, the subject is switching to the size of the sweet space shared by wonderful women. Do the measurements of a lady’s opening impact a man’s opinion of her? Absolutely. Each heterosexual male I asked used their own special phrase to tell me that tight is right. A 35 year old computer whiz who’s in love with his lady said, “I don’t want to get lost in there.” Echoing the same sentiment, a hot 43 year old lawyer said, “It’s not the most important thing, but it does matter. You wouldn’t buy a suit if it was too big. You would get the size that fit.” What impacts a woman’s size? Wear, tear, and lack of exercise. Excessive expanding caused by childbirth, exceptional erogenous activities, and aging muscles combined with inadequate exercise lead to a loose lady. Fortunately, women are made of strong stuff and we can tighten the muscles naturally through Kegel exercises.* However, some women remain unsatisfied with the size of their vagina and shell out cash for surgery. Laser vaginal rejuvenation (LVR) is the most common plastic surgery procedure for the female genitals. It decreases the dimensions of the vagina and most women have the surgery to improve friction and sexual satisfaction. Although it’s an outpatient procedure that takes a couple of hours, the healing process takes about six weeks to complete. Constipation, limited mobility, and absolutely no sex should be expected during the recovery phase. Sounds like the side effects almost defeat the purpose of surgery. Not only are you unable to have sex, but you’re also stiff and full of crap. Who’s going to enjoy your new vagina now? As you might have expected, among those who prefer anal intercourse, size was described similarly to that of a vagina. Bigger is definitely not better. Kegel exercises offer a natural way to tighten the toosh, but those with a loose butt and lots of loot may choose to stitch it up with surgery. Before going
under the knife, be sure to learn about the side effects because nobody wants to hear constipation complaints from a tight ass. I’m hoping a dose of reality boosts everyone’s confidence about their size. There’s no average size of a vagina because women are flexible and accommodating. When aroused, the vagina will elongate and the cervix will move out of the way to create more room. Men are not as unique. Researchers from the University of California found the average erect male penis is just 5.3 inches long. Almost 70% of men measured between 4.6 and 6 inches long. Just over 13% were between 6.1-6.8 inches long and only 2.5% of men were under 3.7 inches long. Less than 3% of men were over 6.9 inches. Remember this the next time a guys brags about his size. Does he actually think he’s bigger than 97% of other males? Regardless of size, all men should remember that orgasms are not created equally. Many women prefer oral stimulation over penis penetration because they’re more likely to climax from cunnilingus. Naturally lubricated, the tongue is one of the body’s strongest muscles and also has great aim. This is very important since the clitoris is most sexually stimulating body part on most women and ignored by the penis during intercourse. So what’s the bottom line? Rather than worry about increasing size, guys who really want to win women over should strengthen their oral skills between her thighs. *To learn more about Kegels, read my column, “ A Woman’s Workout” posted July 8, 2010 on the Sun Post website: sunpostweekly.com
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Style FASHION
Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week Spring/Summer 2011 Bye-Bye Bryant Park, Hello Lincoln Center By Jennifer Fragoso (jennifer@sunpostweekly.com)
Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week is back. From September 9 through 16, the Spring 2011 Collections will be presented at a new address. Previously held under tents erected in Bryant Park this mega watt fashion extravaganza will now be held in Lincoln Center. Boasting a red carpet for the well-heeled buyers editors and stylists making the pilgrimage across town to the show’s new digs. Fashion Week began in the United States during the height of World War II in 1943 as a way to draw attention to our domestic fashion industry. Created for a somewhat captive audience of buyers and fashion editors, unable to travel during the war, the shows were mainly housed in design studios, hotels and venues scattered around town. That is until 1994 when the tents came up in Bryant Park. The midtown landmark made a perfect location considering many showrooms and ateliers were located in the neighborhood. Cut to this glorious day in September where we find Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week on the move to its new home amidst the creative and artistic landmark known as Lincoln Center. While the tents synonymous with the previous location will be utilized there will be increased occupancy and new enhancements like a barcode system called Fashion GPS that will streamline the check in procedures at the doors to individual shows. The SunPost will be joining the few, the proud and the uber fashionable this season with pen in hand and pad at the ready to recount every flair, flounce and floral print that hits the runways. From standing room at the Project Runway show to Badgley Mischka and Nicole Miller we will be there teetering in our stilettos to provide you with vivid coverage of this semi-annual event. Look out New York The SunPost is in town!
LEFT: PROJECT RUNWAY’S CHRISTIAN SIRIANO. ABOVE LEFT: MARC JACOBS. ABOVE RIGHT: CALVIN KLEIN. BELOW: CORTEZAR ESTEBAN. BELOW RIGHT: BAGDLEY MISHKA.
BRYANT PARK TENTS
Page 26 • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • SunPost Weekly • www.sunpostweekly.com
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GENERAL REQUIREMENTS: Computer Proficiency in relevant software AGE: 18 years and above EXPERIENCE: Not less than a year in a similar position EDUCATIONAL QUALIFICATION: Some Colledge / BSC in a related discipline Marketing Manager: In addition to general requirements, candidates must be a holder of an MBA. Have ability to work on a spread sheets Production & Operations Manager: In addition to general requirements, minimum of 2 years experience in an art and galleries firm Admin / Account officer: See general requirement Marketing Executive: See general requirement Stores Officer: See general requirement Secretary/Personal Assistant to CEO: See general requirement. Some accounting and admin background with ability to create spread sheet is a requirement Applicant should within 2 weeks of this publication, forward application letters and resume indicating post applied for to : shauncarter16@rocketmail.com
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OPEN FOR BIDS THE HAPPY KIDS CHILDCARE, INC. INVITES FOOD SERVICE VENDORS TO SUBMIT SEALED BIDS FOR PROVIDING FOOD SERVICE FOR ITS TWO DAY CARE CENTERS. SPECIFICATIONS AND PROPOSALS MAY BE OBTAINED AT THE ADDRESS BELOW ON SEPTEMBER 9TH, 2010 FROM 8.00 AM UNTIL 4.00 PM. SEALED BIDS WILL BE RECEIVED BY HAPPY KIDS CHILDCARE, INC. LOCATED AT 7118 BYRON AVENUE MIAMI BEACH, FLORIDA 33141 UNTIL TUESDAY SEPTEMBER 28TH, 2010 AT 10.30 AM. BIDS WILL BE OPENED ON SEPTEMBER 29TH, 2010 AT 10.00 AM WITH AWARD TO BE MADE ON OR ABOUT SEPTEMBER 29TH, 2010 AT 1.30 PM. THE AWARD IS MADE PENDING APPROVAL BY THE FLORIDA DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH, BUREAU OF CHILD NUTRITION PROGRAMS.
www.sunpostweekly.com • SunPost Weekly • Thursday, September 9, 2010 • Page 27
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