Volume 110, Issue 3

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The Spectator The Stuyvesant High School Newspaper

“The Pulse of the Student Body”

OPINIONS

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Insidious Image

“It” Did Not Deliver

Opinions writer Aya Alryyes delivers a message to Brandy Melville and establishes that “No, One Size Does Not Fit All.”

Arts & Entertainment writer Gavin McGinley reviews “It’s” disappointing sequel in “The Failure of ‘It Chapter 2’”. see page 17

see page 9

Volume 110 No. 3

Wednesday, October 16, 2019

From Classroom to Climate Strike

stuyspec.com

Zoe Oppenheimer / The Spectator

Kris Connor, Getty Images / Courtesy HBO

“The Feelings and the Fear”: A 9/11 Story at Stuyvesant

By NICOLE BUREK, CATHERINE DELL’OLIO, JESSICA JIANG, SHREYA PAUL and JAVED JOKHAI “We deserve a safe future. And we demand a safe future. Is that really too much to ask?” 16-year-old Swedish activist Greta Thunberg said during her speech at the New York City Climate Strike on September 20. “This is the biggest climate strike ever in history, and we all should be so proud of ourselves because we have done this together.” Thunberg spoke to a crowd of 315,000 students, most of whom had walked out of their schools earlier that day. The students, including an estimated

500 from Stuyvesant, gathered at Foley Square. Students walking out carried handmade signs with slogans such as “Do It For Her,” referring to Mother Earth, and chanted, “Hey hey, ho ho; climate change has got to go!” The turnout itself was a victory for the strike’s organizers, who expected less than five percent of that. “We told the NYPD to expect 10,000 people,” said senior Grace Goldstein, who helped plan the march citywide. The march ended in Battery Park, where the strike continued with a rally featuring musical guests and speakers from around the world. “The speakers [at the rally] were incredible, and I absolutely loved that we ended with indigenous

speakers who taught us a song because they are underrepresented in this fight, even though they were fighting it long before the rest of us realized it was a problem,” said senior Cecilia Bachana, who worked on the art committee for the strike, in an e-mail interview. The climate strike, which was part of a larger global movement with about six million people participating worldwide, stemmed from Thunberg’s protests about climate change outside her country’s parliament on Fridays. The strike occurred the day before the United Nations (UN) Climate Summit to demonstrate public support for action against climate change. continued on page 5

By MADDY ANDERSEN and ERIN LEE “My saddest memory from that day is when we were all walking down the West Side Highway and seeing one of my students, a boy named Chaz, looking back,” Assistant Principal of English Eric Grossman said. “There was just something about the way he was that caught my attention. I asked him, ‘Hey, are you all right? What’s going on?’ And he said, ‘My dad works in the north tower.’” Stuyvesant students were blocks away from the Twin Towers, the site of the terrorist attack that would dev-

astate the city and alter their lives, on September 11, 2001. Eighteen years later, eight of these alumni reflected on the events of September 11 in the HBO documentary, “In the Shadow of the Towers: Stuyvesant High on 9/11.” “In the Shadow of the Towers” is one of three new HBO documentaries focused on the events of September 11. The film is comprised of interviews with Taresh Batra (’05), Liz O’Callahan (’02), Catherine Choy (’04), Ilya Feldsherov (’02), Mohammad Haque (’02), Himanshu Suri (’03), Michael Vogel (’02), and Carlos Williams (’05). The majority of interviewees were involved in the 2001

winter drama “With Their Eyes,” which was created by Stuyvesant students in response to the tragedy and shared the stories of the Stuyvesant community during September 11. English teacher Annie Thoms, who was integral in the creation of the play, also served a large role in the development of the HBO documentary. The documentaries were directed by Amy Schatz, who primarily creates children’s shows about difficult topics. “HBO approached me because they had been in conversation with the September 11 Tribute Museum about the fact that there didn’t continued on page 2

On “AP Physics I is a Sham”: New AP Physics Course Faces Controversy In a decision announced last June, the administration has made Advanced Placement (AP) Physics I mandatory for all juniors. This decision, however, has been met with backlash, especially from physics teachers. “Forcing [students] to take an AP Physics class with less time than we gave last year for regular physics is just cruel,” said a physics teacher who wished to remain anonymous. Physics teacher Ulugbek Akhmedov strongly agreed with this teacher, saying, “I think the administration in this school are cowards, and they are playing games with students’ futures.” The single-period AP replaces the 1.5-period Honors Physics course from previous years. Physics lab is held during a separate period, and is taught by physics teachers Eugene Majewski or Neil Wang. The teachers for Honors Physics—Daisy Sharaf, Eugene Majewski, John Avallone, Neil Wang, Rebecca Gorla, Thomas Miner, Thomas Strasser, Ulugbek Akhmedov, and Wai Lam—all now

Anaïs Delfau/ The Spectator

By LUCY BAO, GRACE CANTARELLA, SUBYETA CHOWDHURY and JULIE WEINER

teach AP Physics I. Prior to the change, 68 students were able to take AP Physics I and 68 students were able to take AP Physics II. With the recent change, 850 students now take AP Physics I and 102 students can

take AP Physics II. The administration believes that the change is in the best interests of the students. The Honors Physics course last year encompassed all of the AP Physics I curriculum and

some of the AP Physics II curriculum. “Students were doing a lot of intense [AP-level] work but were not getting validation for it,” Principal Eric Contreras said. According to Assistant Principal

of Chemistry, Physics, and Technology Scott Thomas, when teaching Honors Physics, teachers were often unable to cover all of the material. Changing the class to only teach AP Physics I would shorten the curriculum, making it easier to teach in a school year. This change was implemented with the intention of expanding the number of courses available to students. “I started seeing a trend, which was that, had Stuyvesant students attended their local high schools, they would actually have had more access to AP classes than they have at Stuyvesant,” Contreras said. He also noticed that courses at Stuyvesant had redundancies that were eliminated at other high schools. “The College Board allows local districts to collapse a state mandated course with an AP course. We had already been doing that in the history classes,” Contreras said. The new course helps eliminate such redundancies in the physics department. Lack of interest in AP Physics courses, specifically from female students, was also taken into account when making this decision. continued on page 3


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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

News NEWSBEAT One hundred and twenty Stuyvesant seniors in the Class of 2020 were named National Merit Semifinalists. At a local Speech and Debate competition, senior Christian Bae and junior Rae Jeong placed first and third, repsectively, in Congressional Debate, and junior Reilly Amera placed third in Varsity Oral Interpretation. History teacher Michael Waxman is celebrating the birth of his son, who was born on October 1.

WORLDBEAT Typhoon Hagibis, the biggest storm Japan has seen in decades, slammed into the country early on October 13 and forced many residents to evacuate.

President Donald Trump shocked American allies by acquiescing to a Turkish incursion in northern Syria by pulling back American troops.

The Pacific Gas and Electric Company cut off power to much of Northern California in hopes of reducing wildfire risk.

History teacher Dr. Lisa Greenwald is speaking at the American Library in Paris, France on October 16 about her book, “Daughters of 1968.”

Four people were killed in a shooting at an illegal gambling location in Crown Heights, Brooklyn on October 12.

On October 12, Stuyvesant Model United Nations ran the second iteration of miniMUNC, their local novice conference. Hosted by Directors-General, seniors Alma Thaler and Julian Bedolis, and aided by Secretaries-General, seniors Ahmed Sultan, Joseph Yusufov and Max Goldstein, the conference welcomed over a hundred and fifty delegates from schools throughout New York City.

The Supreme Court is hearing cases about whether employers can fire gay employees because of their sexual orientation or transgender employees because of their gender identities. The 1964 Civil Rights Act bars discrimination in employment “because of sex,” and while fired employees argue that this phrase is intended to protect them, employers say the law was never meant to cover gay or transgender employees.

“The Feelings and the Fear”: A 9/11 Story at Stuyvesant seem to be much out there for kids about September 11. Since I make children’s shows, they thought that making a children’s show about September 11 could be a great thing and fill a need,” Schatz said. Schatz started by interviewing kids to find out what questions young children had about September 11. “The way that I start all of my children’s shows is that I talk with kids. Some of the questions kids had were, ‘Exactly what happened?’ or ‘Why did it happen?’ or ‘Why would someone do that?’ My goal was to try to answer some of those questions for kids,” she said. “Once I had their questions in hand, I went out to try to come up with what the show could be. That led me to the play that Ms. Thoms had created with some students from Stuyvesant in 2001 and 2002 called ‘With Their Eyes.’ I read it, and I thought it would be really interesting to learn more about the play, and that it might be an interesting thing for kids to hear about.” “With Their Eyes” is based on the work of actor and playwright Anna Deavere Smith and is structured as an interview-based monologue. In the winter of 2001, Thoms, along with a student director and two student producers, cast 10 students to help them create and perform “With Their Eyes.” Thoms and the 13 students created a list of members of the Stuyvesant community—students, teachers, faculty—whom they wanted to interview about their experience during and after September 11. “The actors went and did the interviews on their own, and then when they had the interviews, they transcribed portions of the interviews very carefully, word for word, pause for pause, line by line, and cut them way down. They did some editing, shifting around. Some of the interviews were half an hour long, and they wound up being monologues that were two to five minutes,” Thoms said. Students transcribed the interviews into “poem-monologues,” which they then performed and presented during the winter drama. In the early stages of creating “In the Shadow of the Towers,” Schatz interviewed the eight alumni, most of whom were involved in “With Their Eyes” as actors, interviewees, or producers. She intended to incorporate their interviews and information about “With Their Eyes” into her film for children. “When I interviewed these eight alumni, it wasn’t intended to be a film about Stuyvesant. It was really about ‘What can you tell me about day, it seemed like it was a whole new film, solely about

their experiences and what they went through.” Schatz realized there was a larger story within the interviews, one about students’ experiences during September 11. “The stories were very powerful and very vivid. The memories of the day were so visual; these students had remembered the sights and the smells, the feelings and the fear. It seemed a little bit too intense for a younger audience,” she said. Schatz then decided to create three separate films: one for elementary age kids called “What Happened on September 11?,” one about the making of “With Their Eyes,” and one in which Stuyvesant alumni re-

coming about. And then it just grew into Amy wanting to really bring the documentary she had made here for our viewing.” Several of the alumni who appear in the documentary came to the screening and were able to share their thoughts on the documentary, “With Their Eyes,” and their September 11 experience during a panel moderated by junior Reilly Amera. Despite creating “With Their Eyes” almost two decades ago, the alumni involved regard the play as an incredibly important part of their high school experiences and their lives as a whole. “I don’t think I explored 9/11 in my own mind outside

“The people who created things around September 11 had a better opportunity to process what had happened than people who did not,” he said. “[We had] a real opportunity to think about and process what [had] happened and how we [...] thought it was appropriate to memorialize it, and I think that was [...] incredibly meaningful.” Thoms agreed as well. “I’m an English teacher, and I love stories. I think there is great good in reading and writing and creating art and interacting with art that allows for an empathetic link,” she said. “In the days and weeks and months afterward, for me, being able to teach and work with students to create something

count their memories of the day. This last film is now “In the Shadow of the Towers.” Members of the Stuyvesant community were able to watch the documentary through an early screening hosted at Stuyvesant on September 10. This was coordinated primarily by HBO Publicity/Media Producer Manager Asheba Edghill and Director of Family Engagement Dina Ingram, with support from the Alumni Association. “In about May, Annie Thoms had told me about the work she had been doing with HBO on ‘With Their Eyes,’ and she and Amy Schatz wanted to bring it here to the [Stuyvesant] community,” Ingram said. “[Thoms] put me in contact with Amy Schatz at HBO, and that’s how it first started

of the ‘With Their Eyes’ group. [...] I don’t think I commemorated 9/11 with anyone but people in my homeroom or people in ‘With Their Eyes,’ and maybe a teacher or two,” said Williams, who performed a monologue in “With Their Eyes.” Williams found that, to his dismay, his connection to September 11 prompted questions and inquiries from many people, especially in college. “You don’t want to have to tell [the story] over and over—it’s not a great experience to have and you don’t want to relive it every five seconds,” he said. “Having the play and being able to tell a large group of people at a time about the play really saved me from having to relive [my personal experience] over and over again.” Vogel, who produced “With Their Eyes,” echoed similar ideas.

was incredibly helpful, because what were you going to do? Sit at home and cry?” While “With Their Eyes” was a way for students to process the attack immediately afterward, the HBO documentary served as a means for the interviewees to reflect on their experiences two decades later. “What you get from the documentary is this reflection of what [had] happened, and these critical events jump out and stick out of the memory for people who were there that day,” Vogel said. The alumni noted other fundamental differences between the documentary and the play. “The documentary does a very good job of telling a story, and telling an important story, and telling a story that I hope can allow the current school population and maybe a broader audience to per-

Kris Connor, Getty Images / Courtesy HBO

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ceive what that story was like and how people were affected on a human level on September 11,” Vogel said. “But I think there is a meaningful difference between what the documentary had to capture and what it had available to it, and what we were able to capture doing ‘With Their Eyes’ and the resources that were available to us.” Though the alumni do not hold the documentary with the same level of personal significance as the play, they have been touched by the feedback they have received regarding the film. “The fact that people identified with the story means a lot to me,” said Haque, a subject of a monologue in “With Their Eyes.” “Response to the interviews and the documentary has been overwhelmingly positive and really supportive, and as a result of that, I feel like I made the right decision by being involved in it and sharing something that’s pretty vulnerable and difficult to talk about.” Many interviewees emphasized the idea that the documentary shed light on one specific aspect of the attack, and is not a fully comprehensive view of September 11 or the Stuyvesant experience of September 11. “It’s 30 minutes, right—you can’t tell the story of the whole school in 30 minutes. You could tell a story of what happened,” Vogel said. Williams also believes that this documentary is not a complete depiction of the school’s experience with the attack. “I don’t think it’s the full story of Stuyvesant; I think it’s a conversation starter,” he said. “There needs to be more told, a lot more told, about what the school went through on that day.” For Lila Nordstrom (’02), one such missing element is the health issue that has plagued survivors, including Stuyvesant students, in the aftermath of the attack. Stuyvesant was one of the first schools in the area to open its doors again shortly after the event, which unknowingly exposed students to the debris and fumes in the disaster area. In response to the lack of medical attention given to survivors, Nordstrom developed StuyHealth in 2006. StuyHealth is an advocacy group for young adults affected by the events and aftermath of September 11 and provides health resources and information for qualified survivors and responders. “We do work to help people find out about the health programs and compensation programs that are available to them,” Nordstrom said. “[We] also do the best we can to make sure that the needs of young adults are represented in conversations about how these services should be coordinated and with services people in the community need.” continued on page 3


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

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News “The Feelings and the Fear”: A 9/11 Story at Stuyvesant

continued from page 2

Nordstrom expressed her frustration with the lack of acknowledgement of health issues as part of the September 11 story. “I don’t fault my classmates for not bringing it up because none of them were at the time of their interviews having health consequences,” she said. “But the filmmakers were given an opportunity not only to discuss that topic with me but with other people and they chose not to include even passing mention of it, which was incredibly frustrating considering how long we’ve been engaged in this work and how much of a struggle it’s been to convince people that this is a part of the story.” Nordstrom also believes the health aspect is intensely personal, as Choy, one of the eight alumni in the documentary, passed away before the film was released due to gastric cancer linked to September 11. “To me, a part of this story, of the film is that [Choy] gets on camera and talks about her experience of 9/11,” Nordstrom said. “The end of that story is that she dies of an illness that was linked to that time. The end of the story is about the health consequences, and [the filmmakers] sort of don’t follow through on that promise.” The documentary is dedicated to Choy, whose time at Stuyvesant is remembered dearly by members of

the community. “She really was just a totally great person and kid, and incredibly warm and positive,” Grossman said. Additionally, he attributes his reaction to the film to his personal connections with the people interviewed and the event itself. “I found it very affecting,” Grossman said. “But I know that a big piece of that is because I was here on 9/11 and I knew those students and Cathy Choy [...] was a sophomore in my class that year and was in my room when the planes hit.” Grossman’s experience watching the documentary was shaped by his familiarity with the students who appeared in it. “It was 18 years ago, but I remember most of those faces and a lot of those names, and they’re still active for me,” he said. “The fact that those students are now full-fledged adults, not just grown, but well into their 30s—I don’t feel like it’s been that long.” The interviewees recognize the significance of having a documentary like this about September 11. “It changed the world. And I think ‘With Their Eyes’ does a good job of capturing, and I think the documentary does a good job of capturing, in some ways, how the world changed in that moment,” Vogel said. One particular aspect that Schatz captured was the shift in political cli-

mate after September 11 and how it mirrors that of today. “It seemed clear to me that one of [Schatz’s] hopes was to draw a line between the reaction to Muslims and brown people in the wake of 9/11 and the political

American, as a New Yorker. There is this confusion in your mind about how people can take what you hold so close and so dear to you and twist it and manipulate it into something so hateful.”

“The stories were very powerful and very vivid. The memories of the day were so visual; these students had remembered the sights and the smells, the feelings and the fear.” —Amy Schatz, director of “In the Shadows of the Towers” climate today, and that feels valid and important to me,” Grossman said. Haque, a Muslim-American, grappled with his identity amid the persisting racial issues following September 11. “Especially when the news [was] really talking about how the perpetrators of this heinous act claim to be Muslims and claim to carry out the act in the name of the religion, it [created] a lot of identity issues,” he said. “I was born and raised in Queens, grew up as a Queens kid, went to school in the city. I really identified as not only Muslim, but also as

In addition to his identity issues, Haque also struggled with day-today life after the attack. “There were specific instances, and non-specific instances as well, just the way that people reacted toward you or looked toward you. Your identity is on your face, and that’s what people see first. They see a Muslim person or a brown person, and that’s the first idea they have of you, and they come up with preconceived notions and ideas that are then projected onto you,” he said. “It’s really difficult to be happy and functioning when you are worried

about what people think and how people are going to see you.” On a smaller, more Stuyvesant-focused scale, the alumni hope the documentary can educate the Stuyvesant population about their own community. “I think [it] would benefit current and future students to learn about the place that they’re standing. There’s some history there,” Williams said. “So much of history class [...] is like 50 years ago in Selma or in 1776 with Washington crossing the Delaware, and you’re so detached from it.” Thoms built upon this notion. “It was a pivotal moment in our national history. In terms of students at [Stuyvesant], it’s a pivotal moment in national history and in the history of our community,” she said. “Having some sense of what those individual experiences were like is incredibly important in order to have a better sense of our community’s small part in history.” Those involved in the documentary hope it sheds new light on the perspectives of Stuyvesant students during September 11. “There’s no small story when it comes to something like September 11,” Haque said. “Maybe stories that were never really exposed or told before—the documentary maybe, potentially brought some of those to life.”

On “AP Physics I is a Sham”: New AP Physics Course Faces Controversy continued from page 1

Additionally, limited numbers of spots in the senior AP Physics C course meant that many students applying to college as engineering majors were put at a disadvantage. “Currently, [the graduating class] has very few kids with AP Physics, and from those very few kids, the vast majority were boys. I thought that there needed to be something that allows for universal experience that gives everyone, male and female, [...] access to an AP Physics course,” Contreras said. “Having a foundational experience that’s validated by colleges at least allows all students, male and female, to enter the university space by having a building block that is transactional for colleges.” Contreras also mentioned how taking an AP Physics I course in high school can prove to be a financial benefit for many students. “When we talk about schools charging upwards of $1000 of credit, even three credits are significant money. It’s real money and a substance of savings for families. It also allows students in college who come in with AP Physics, even with a non-science major, [to] be credited as [fulfilling] the science requirement. It allows you to not take another class. It opens up room not just in high school, but also in college later on,” Contreras said. Finally, the shift to an AP course means that the curriculum has become standardized. The previous Honors Physics course was not taught based on one shared curriculum. What was taught varied between teachers, as some teachers taught in more depth than others. All in all, the administration sees the change as a positive one. “I think that as we move forward, all new ways of doing something have tradeoffs and also take some time. It may not lead to an outcome that’s ideal, but it’s worth trying especially because AP [Physics] I requires Algebra, and every junior enters that space with that prerequisite knowledge,” Conteras said. While the administration believes this configuration is in the best interests of the students, many physics teachers disagree greatly with the changes. Most teachers declined requests for an interview or have asked to stay off the record. Teachers were informed of the change on June 24, two school days before school ended on June 26. “We have a fundamental disagreement with the administration on how they implemented this. There was no planning, and the way they have done this is totally unprofessional,” said a physics teacher, who has asked to remain anonymous and shall be referred to as Teacher A. “It is against all research in physics education research. It is against best practices. It is against the recommendation of the American Association of Physics Teachers. It is against all current knowledge in the field, and they still did it. It’s really a terrible idea to do this as a mandatory class.” Every

physics teacher who was interviewed revealed that neither themselves nor their students were consulted about the change. Contreras acknowledges this and wishes that the implementation of mandatory AP Physics I had been smoother. “I don’t disagree that we could have had more time [to] consult. That’s true. I will own that. I am driven by the need of what students need now,” he said. “In hindsight, there’s always the approach of trying to give more time to prepare. That is something that I could have done better.” Contreras also said that an e-mail was sent out last spring to all physics teachers regarding a training class by

“We have a fundamental disagreement with the administration on how they implemented this. There was no planning, and the way they have done this is totally unprofessional.” —Anonymous physics teacher the College Board about teaching AP Physics I, and another e-mail was sent out with information about another professional training day in November. The administration has also offered to fund these courses so teachers will not have to pay for them. “I’m not mandating it because I don’t believe in forcing people to go to training they don’t want to, and I will continue to offer it,” Contreras said. Additionally, teachers are worried that with the class time reduced from 7.5 class periods per week to just five, “understanding will be much more shallow [and] expectations [will be] lowered,” Akhmedov said. “If [physics teachers] were consulted, they would’ve said that five periods a week is not sufficiently enough time for AP [Physics] I.” Another anonymous physics teacher, who shall be referred to as Teacher B, agrees, saying, “AP Physics I is more conceptual than Regents, and it really helps to have more time to do longer problems and be able to reflect on what you’re doing. Students don’t have the same problem-solving time that they would in a regular class.” In addition, many physics teachers expressed concern over the workload being pushed onto students. “The workload is going up, the speed is going up, and the homework is going up from half an hour to an hour. I know that the administrators are telling us that it will be easier, but I just don’t see how this is reducing student workload if we have to do more topics at a more difficult level in less time with more homework,” Teacher A said.

The teacher continued, saying, “[The students] have no choice. Whether you want it or not, you are in AP Physics. That’s not what’s happening at other schools. [Bronx Science and Brooklyn Tech] have the option of either taking AP Physics or Regents physics.” To this, Contreras has thought about reintroducing a non-AP option. “In future years, I would consider a non-AP option, but the non-AP option has to be an all-Regents option. It can’t be cloaked as a college textbook, college work without getting the benefit of having the designation of an AP credit that can be of transactional and real, meaningful financial value,” he said. But despite the administration’s claims of college-related benefits due to taking AP Physics I, many physics teachers do not believe the course will count for college credit. “In principle, if [students] do well on the AP exam, there are some colleges that will accept it for credit, but specifically the AP [Physics] I exam isn’t generally accepted for college credit at most [selective] colleges,” Teacher B said. Though there are colleges that will accept AP Physics I, Stuyvesant students may not even qualify for this college credit. This is because most of the physics teachers are not certified to teach AP Physics. Students will also only complete the Regents physics labs, not the required AP labs. Moreover, students will not satisfy the AP credit requirement that AP Physics I labs must be 25 percent of instructional time. Akhmedov said, “I would title [the article] ‘AP [Physics] I is a Sham,’ because it is.” While students are required to take the Physics Regents in order to qualify for the Stuyvesant-endorsed diploma, they are not required to take the AP Physics I exam for the diploma. Because of the switch to AP Physics I, teachers had to cut many topics that are covered in the Regents curriculum. As a result, many teachers are worried about their students’ ability to perform well on the Physics Regents exam this year, which may jeopardize their Stuyvesant diploma. When teachers confronted the administration about this issue, they felt that Thomas showed a lack of concern for the students by saying, “students are on their own.” “[He] said, ‘They can get a review book and study on their own. They’re on their own for the Regents exam,’” Teacher B said. “I don’t think [that this should be] the approach for something that is part of the Stuyvesant diploma.” Contreras believes there was a misunderstanding, explaining that some Regents topics will be covered through labs. Additionally, the AP exam will take place in early May, and the Regents exam will take place in late June. The administration suggests that the Regents topics not covered in the AP Physics I course can be taught in between that period of time. “There are ways that we can problem-solve

to give our students what’s in the best interest for them, and that requires a level of flexibility and openness and a willingness to roll up our sleeves and figure things out together,” Contreras said. Another aspect of the change includes the separation of instructional periods and lab periods. According to the administration, this decision was made to help expand the opportunities for students to take more classes and electives. “One of the advantages of making universal courses is that it allows for complete programming flexibility because you can put it anywhere in the day,” Contreras said. This change also enables students to have a free period on the days they do not have lab. Furthermore, the absence of shared, consistent labs in the previous structure led to inconsistent experiences by students. The separation of labs, which are now taught by only two teachers, creates consistency by ensuring that all students are taught the same labs in the same manner. “However, I do understand that this is something to consider for next year. To do that work, we have to agree that there has to be consistency in the lab experience, and that is going to require some work,” Contreras said. “I think it’s possible to get there and [have] teachers teach the class and the lab, and have the shared experience,

“Having a foundational experience that’s validated by colleges at least allows all students, male and female, to enter the university space by having a building block that is transactional for colleges.” —Eric Contreras, Principal but sometimes you have to step away from what you’re doing to re-enter that space and create that consistency. I’m not opposed to doing that.” Majewski and Wang, the two lab teachers, have to keep track of 424 lab manuals per week in addition to teaching, which Wang feels can be demanding. Still, Wang has informally expressed his support for this reform and believes that it is for the best of the school. However, many of the other physics teachers do not share Wang’s support for this change to physics labs. “[Wang and Majewski] have 500 students, and you see them every fourth day. They will never know who you are. You are a number in their gradebook. That’s ridiculous. We [have] created a system where students are anonymous numbers that

have to swipe in,” Teacher A said. It is also hard to fully complete labs in only a single period. “I just think that’s an appalling idea. You just cannot finish a thoughtful lab in one period,” Teacher A said. Akhmedov believes that the lab and class experience will be disconnected, since the lab and class periods are now separate. “I don’t know how [Wang and Majewski] grade so many labs and how they have time to look over each lab, but since labs are taken away from most teachers, I don’t know what they do in the lab,” he said. “It’s really hard to make connections between the experiences they have in lab and the concepts they learn in class.” Adding on, Teacher A said, “The American Association of Physics Teachers specifically warns against doing what we just did—splitting the lab off.” A student who wishes to remain anonymous had similar sentiments to Akhmedov regarding lab. “I feel like it doesn’t make sense [to separate lab and regular class time] because the labs don’t correspond with the lessons that we learn in class,” the student said. “The labs expect you to know things you may not have learned, depending on the teacher you have for regular physics class time.” Teachers have also mentioned that Contreras has refused to communicate about further changes to the course. “The principal is trying to hide behind his assistant principal, and he is not taking responsibility for the mess he has created,” Akhmedov said. However, Contreras emphasized how he was open to new ideas and conversation regarding the changes. “This decision is not a perfect decision; no decision is. It’s one that I’m willing to think about [in regards to] how it can be made better and allow for more time with more input,” he said. “I do acknowledge that, and I think that there’s always room for allowing for more conversation, and I think that’s something I can do more of. But I also know that our students need what they need now.” While the administration hopes the new course will be able to diminish the gender imbalance in AP Physics courses, as well as prepare students for college, teachers are worried about students’ performance in this higher college-level course and wish students had an alternate option. Contreras, however, believes that change has to start on some premise, and corrections can be made from there. “Let’s try it in good faith. Let’s tweak it and make corrections for next year. Let’s do what’s best for children because that’s what our mandate is. It can’t start from the premise that, ‘This is terrible, and we shouldn’t do AP [Physics] I. AP [Physics] I is a terrible course, and the College Board is not good.’ If we start from that premise, then we don’t move pass that impasse,” he said.


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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

News Administration Addresses Cafeteria Challenges By EMMA DONNELLY, JAMES LEE, MADELYN MAO and THEO SCHIMINOVICH

In a school with more than 3000 students, rules must be implemented to keep all the students safe. Responding to safety concerns regarding overcrowding in the cafeteria, the administration has been enforcing policies like the no-headphones rule, and is requiring students to swipe their IDs to enter the lunchroom. However, these policies have sparked outrage among many students, who are put off by the long lines for the cafeteria and question the purported benefits. One of the newly enforced policies is that students must swipe in at the scanners in front of the cafeteria upon entering. According to Assistant Principal of Security, Health, and Physical Education Brian Moran, this was implemented due to student complaints regarding the cafeteria. “We were getting a lot of students [who] were complaining that there’s no room anywhere to sit, so we want to make sure that the students [who] are there are supposed to be there, that they have lunch,” Moran said. “It’s mostly [for] capacity reasons, to make sure students that are there can be comfortable, sit down, eat their lunch, and not have to stand up [or] eat on a bench.” The scanning of ID cards was also implemented to prevent students from cutting classes and going to the cafeteria. “We have found in the past that students cut in there and stay in there for multiple periods, and it’s kind of a place where kids can sometimes just hide out. So we want to make sure [that] who’s in there is supposed to be in there,” Moran said.

In addition, the school has been enforcing its no-headphones policy more heavily in the cafeteria. This change was made to make policy more consistent throughout the building, and to eliminate the confusion regarding where headphones can be used. Moran stressed that students must be more cognizant of when and where they decide to use their electronics given their increased freedom with the updated cell phone policy. “It is important to remember that we created the cell phone [policy] through the SLT [School Leadership Team], meaning students, parents, [and] teachers all had input and it was overwhelmingly supported,” Moran said. “So we gave you guys some extra freedoms, and with that comes more responsibilities.” While many of these policy changes appear to be new, these plans have been in the works for years. The scanning is a continuation of past years’ policy; previously, scanning students into the lunchroom was standard protocol, but was halted temporarily as the scanning machines were being repaired and new parts needed to be ordered. “There are no new policies that are being implemented in the cafeteria. We are going to begin scanning, like we’ve done in the past; we are bringing that back, where students will have to scan into the [cafeteria] during their frees or lunch period,” Moran said. Despite the administration’s intention to make the cafeteria a safer and more welcoming environment, some students have expressed their dissatisfaction with the new changes. Junior Theadora Williams has spent her lunch periods protesting against the changes in the cafeteria. “The new scanning protocol [...] doesn’t do anything, it just slows everyone down,” she said.

Williams also added that scanning in IDs would not reduce cafeteria issues, and suggested improvements that the administration could implement instead. “[The administration] is forcing the students to use the cafeteria because they keep on trying to stop kids from eating outside,” she said. As an alternative, she suggested that the school increase the number of tables and chairs in order to combat overcrowding. Senior and SLT Representative Nina Jennings recognizes the student and safety concerns regarding the scanners in the cafeteria. “The scanners being added has, according to many students, slowed down

the SLT to reach an agreement in which students and the administration are both satisfied. “We have to understand these policies were instituted for administrative reasons, but we hope that we can find a way to make these policies more suitable for student happiness,” Jennings said. “We have opened conversation with the administration about the headphone and scanners issues in the cafeteria, and several members of the administration have begun seeking solutions.” While the school is attempting to address consistency in their policy and overcrowding, the administration has long seen issues regarding maintenance and cleanliness of

“We have found in the past that students cut in there and stay in there for multiple periods, and it’s kind of a place where kids can sometimes just hide out. So we want to make sure [that] who’s in there is supposed to be there.” —Brian Moran, Assistant Principal of Security, Health, and Physi-

cal Education the process [of getting] into the cafeteria during popular lunch periods, and the wait often crowds the entrance and nearby stairwell. Not only is this an issue of inconvenience, [but] it also becomes a safety hazard when many students are crowding areas like the stairwell and hallway during passing,” Jennings said in an e-mail interview. The Student Union is working with the administration through

the cafeteria. “We are the biggest high school in Manhattan and [...] we do not do a good job cleaning up in the cafeteria. There are always food trays left behind, and if they wind up in the garbage they don’t get recycled,” Moran said. To combat this, administration is enforcing cleanup protocols in the cafeteria and extending enforcement beyond that of previous years. “If you remember last

year, the principal and myself and the APs, every period, would be in the cafeteria reminding students to pick up after themselves,” Moran said. “We have school aids and deans and other staff members that are assigned to the [cafeteria] doing their best. But it is a lot of students and it is five periods a day. It is very busy in there so if students don’t take personal responsibility, it gets very messy and obviously the recycling thing will not be as successful.” Moran emphasized the responsibilities students have in the cafeteria. “I absolutely think that every student should be responsible for cleaning up after themselves,” Moran said. “The Environmental Club, which does a tremendous job with [biology teacher Marissa] Maggio, has been overwhelmed because of the fact that other students aren’t chipping in and doing their part. So I think they can only do so much; every student has to participate.” Members of the Environmental Club say that the increased enforcement is making a difference in the cafeteria. “I think having lunch monitors reminding students to recycle has had the biggest impact as students can no longer turn a blind eye and simply walk away from their trash; they are literally told face to face to throw their waste away,” the cabinet members of the Environmental Club said in an email interview. All the changes being implemented in the cafeteria have been made to create a safer and more eco-friendly atmosphere for students to use during their frees and lunch period. However, in order for these changes to be effective, both students and faculty members must equally contribute toward improving the cafeteria.

Matt Melucci / The Spectator

From Classroom to Climate Strike

Zoe Oppenheimer / The Spectator

Hiruni Kumari / The Spectator

“I do think everyone should try to do what they can, try to take the thing you felt at the rally and the vision of the future and how it could end up going—try to apply it to your daily life as much as possible.” —Grace Goldstein, senior


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

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Matt Melucci / The Spectator

Zoe Oppenheimer / The Spectator

News

Matt Melucci / The Spectator

Hiruni Kumari / The Spectator

From Classroom to Climate Strike continued from page 1 Besides speaking during the rally in Battery Park, Thunberg spoke at the UN conference as well. Stuyvesant’s participation in the event was organized by students who are passionate about climate change. “I think [climate change is] the most important issue of our time. I need to try to do as much as possible to work toward a solution,” said senior Alex Nobert, who was one of Stuyvesant’s organizers. “Activism makes me feel like I’m doing more.” For Goldstein, the protest was necessary to change the attitude surrounding climate change. “Change has always happened through protest. Protests build awareness. Protests build empathy and compassion. They create networks of people who can work together in the future,” she said. Many students felt the presence of this network during the strike, noting that the strike fostered a sense of solidarity. “I felt a sense of togetherness that I loved. People of all ages marched and shouted with us. It

was mostly teenagers, but countless adults and even young children joined in,” Bachana said. However, the strike did not create the same sense of unity among all Stuyvesant students. An anonymous student who attended the march explained their disappointment with Stuyvesant’s response to the event. “The Stuyvesant community was overall indifferent to the march. I could tell whether or not some of the staff supported [...] the students walking out, and it was quite easy to see that some of my teachers didn’t approve of either the climate change protest or [of] cutting class to fight for our beliefs,” they said in an e-mail interview. Another student, who also wished to remain anonymous, believes that the protest is altogether ineffective. “I don’t believe that a bunch of teenagers blocking traffic is going to make much of a difference,” they said. Despite the backlash, students are still proud of the walkout and what it symbolized. “Our strike did not aim to change everything right

[a]way; in fact, multiple speakers and organizers both at the event and behind the scenes repeated that this is only the beginning,” Bachana said. “The goal of this strike was to make it clear to the world that we will no longer stand idly by and watch those with power destroy our lives and our homes, and I think it did that.” In the days leading up to the strike, the Department of Education (DOE) announced its decision to excuse all absences from class as long as students had notes signed by their parents allowing them to leave. Goldstein expressed mixed feelings about the amnesty granted by the DOE. While Goldstein considers the excused absences a victory, knowing that “at other schools, it really, really helped the turnout, [...] in [Stuyvesant’s] case, it backfired a little bit because the administration’s policy became ‘we won’t physically let you leave the building unless you have a note saying so signed by a parent,’” she said. Goldstein thinks that instead of treating the walkout as a student-led protest, the administration “treat[ed]

it like a field trip where you need a permission slip or [they] won’t let you leave at all,” she said. Bachana is also ambivalent. “Many students think that it kills

“I think [climate change is] the most important issue of our time. I need to try to do as much as possible to work toward a solution.” —Alex Nobert, senior the point of the strike, which was to defy ‘what we were supposed to do,’” she said. On the other hand, she is grateful that no students were penalized for the strike and thinks the amnesty was a way for the DOE to extend a silent hand of support to the cause, sending a powerful message to the national government.

It remains to be seen where the momentum from the strike will go, but students are excited about continuing to fight for climate change. “I certainly think there will be more strikes planned,” Nobert said. “Getting people to be involved in specific local policy is important.” “I look forward to being able to help out even more in the coming months and the coming strikes,” Bachana said. Though the march is seen as undeniably significant by the organizers, they also emphasize that changing small things in your everyday routine is incredibly important. “Everyone can’t be a politician [and] everyone can’t be a climate scientist, but everyone should still be contributing to this,” Goldstein said. “I do think everyone should try to do what they can, try to take the thing you felt at the rally and the vision of the future and how it could end up going—try to apply it to your daily life as much as possible.”


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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Features The Notes on Stuyvesant’s Musicians By SOPHIA LIN and SUSANNAH AHN

Shreyantan Chanda / The Spectator

Cosmo Coen

Aidan Ng

Senior Cosmo Coen has been playing music for 14 years. Directing music in theater productions and performing for Stuyvesant Outlet Showcase, Coen is an absolute music prodigy. According to Coen, music has been in his life for as long as he can remember. He fell in love with music when his teacher at the time gave him his first challenging piece. “I was around seven or eight, and I couldn’t stop talking about it on the way home,” Coen said. A woman on the street overheard and introduced Coen to his current music teacher. “I then switched [teachers] and I was so so so so so happy,” he said. “And that’s when I realized that this is what I want to do.” Coen’s current teacher also encouraged Coen to apply for the well-known Manhattan School of Music. This year will be his ninth and final year attending. Coen’s musical activities often overlap with his academics, and that has become one of the biggest obstacles in his musical career. “Balancing time is so hard, and you constantly have to remind yourself [of] what you’re working for. You just get so caught up in the workload and forget that you actually have to practice to get anywhere. But it’s really all worth it,” he explained. In the future, Coen plans on majoring in music to some capacity in college. To aspiring musicians, he advised, “Persevere. Always. And if you don’t love it with all of your heart, why bother?”

Joshua Kim Like many other Asian-Americans, junior Joshua Kim was enrolled in piano lessons at a young age. As time passed, he wanted to try something new, so he decided to switch to the clarinet. His love for music led him to learn how to play various instruments on his own. In addition to the piano that he has played for eight years and the clarinet for four, Kim knows how to play the electric guitar, bass guitar, and drums. Kim has been a member of the SophFrosh SING! band for two years, as a clarinetist in 2018, and as a director and conductor in 2019. Though he really enjoyed the experience of directing SING! band, he admits that it was not easy. “People with different musical backgrounds, styles, and skills are coming together to [form] one piece, one harmony,” he explained. The challenge is more of figuring out how to deliver musical expression rather than the technical aspects of music. In addition to SING!, Kim is also a member of the All-City Honors Band, Stuyvesant Theater Community Band, and a chamber group. Kim is interested in composing his own music, but school and other extracurricular activities take up the majority of his time. Though he is a busy junior, he always finds time to practice music. “I stay up late. Depending on the homework, [I sleep] around 2 [a.m.],” Kim said. “I spend like an hour after school practicing.”

“As a musician, you need to love yourself.” —Cosmo Coen, senior

Cecilia Bachana

Alisha Heng Junior Alisha Heng is both a musician and a young composer. Her musical career started with the piano. She switched to the clarinet four years ago, after falling in love with its sound. Heng has written a piano concerto, as well as other pieces of original music, which she shares on Soundcloud. Her first original piece took six months to finish; Heng has high standards for her music, as she explains that she does not consider a piece to be 100 percent complete until she feels that it is perfect. Her experience with music has not always been so smooth sailing. “I experienced two really terrible periods of burnout last school year, which really pushed and terrified me because I had never experienced that before. It occurred to me in relatively close periods of time and I was scared that I wouldn’t be able to enjoy music again, but it worked out thanks to the support I received from a few people,” she said. In the future, Heng hopes to study in a conservatory, but for now, she just wants to enjoy music. “I just want to see where life takes me,” she said.

“My songs stem from my thoughts and feelings, and it’s all very sincere.” –Cecilia Bachana, senior

“As a musician, I think it’s important to branch out to different things because you don’t know what you love before you start doing it.” —Aidan Ng, junior

Coco Fang / The Spectator

Senior Cecilia Bachana has always been surrounded by music. Bachana started playing piano at the age of five; as the years went by, her love for music grew deeper as she learned the bass guitar and more rock/alternative music. In eighth grade, Bachana began to write her first songs. “I wrote the lyrics to my first song in five minutes while I was overwhelmed by emotions regarding something that had been happening with a friend. There was no going back,” Bachana recalled. The roots of her songs are her experiences and emotions. She describes the outside world, from newspaper headlines to conversations with a stranger, as her inspiration. “My songs stem from my thoughts and feelings, and it’s all very sincere,” she said. Bachana also experiences the frustrations that come with comparison. “I constantly compare my progress, my music, and my choices to other people, even those of my musician friends,” she said. “The hardest thing for me is to remind myself that everyone’s path is different, that one songwriter friend might be getting really popular […] another seems to be doing photo shoots and selling actual albums on iTunes already […] but that as long as I’m working hard and I want it as badly as I do, following that desire and that passion any way it takes me is totally valid.” Bachana emphasizes that her path does not necessarily need to follow a strict model. “What’s important is that I’m taking the route that works for me and is natural for me,” she said. Bachana admits that balancing her school and music schedules are difficult. “I barely balance them. Last year I never really practiced,” she noted. “But this year, I’m aiming to commit to [music] more, so I have a schedule for my music Instagram that forces me to make time for writing.”

Junior Aidan Ng realized his interest in music when he was three years old, after discovering the melodies he could play on the piano. Ng’s music repertoire began to take shape after creating his first original music piece in the fifth grade. His inspirations for composing are “usually just a feeling or mood,” he said. As or his music preferences, “I don’t really have a favorite music piece, partly because there’s so much good stuff out there and depending on how you’re feeling one day, what song you want to listen to will change,” Ng commented. When it comes to genres, Ng prefers pieces with “soft piano music with voice or electronic dance music, because I can really appreciate the amount of work that gets put into making those pieces,” he said. In the eighth grade, Ng decided to start a YouTube channel. Though he admitted that it initially was a way to share music with friends, the channel eventually became Ng’s platform for his musical career. He found it easier to “develop connections and [his] identity as a composer,” he said. One of his biggest challenges as a musician and composer is balancing his studies with his passion for music. “Schoolwork is just so much sometimes, and in order to remedy that, I try to be a part of as [many] musicrelated activities in Stuy[vesant] as possible to kind of force [myself] to get exposed to music constantly in my life,” Ng explained. “In the end, I think it’s just the same way you’d balance schoolwork and any other extracurricular—you just have to manage your time.” While Ng acknowledges his diminishing amounts of free time, his love for music lives on. “I have a lot less time to make music now, but I still try to work on something every month or so, especially on long weekends or days where I just have a lot less homework,” he said. Ng advises aspiring musicians to reach out of their comfort zones. “You never know where your music will lead you, and staying open to possibilities has helped me find my identity as a composer,” he stated. “As a musician, I think it’s important to branch out to different things because you don’t know what you love before you start loving it.”


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

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Features The Unconventional Side of the Employment Spectrum By ELLEN PEHLIVANIAN and JULIE WEINER

While many of our parents push us to become doctors, lawyers, and engineers, many adults end up working professionally in a wide range of different fields. We spoke with a few students whose parents have interesting and unconventional jobs that made an impact on these students’ childhoods.

Cosmo Coen beria, which was really tough, he did New Guinea.” In these countries during wartime, Robert Coen interviewed military rebels, child soldiers, and other groups involved in combat in villages. He grew up in Africa, which might explain his close connection to the continent. Though Robert Coen works primarily with UNICEF, he also writes as a freelance journalist. Journalism has given him a platform to make a meaningful impact on underprivileged children. “He goes to villages and interviews underserved children and talks about schools being built there, or if they don’t have proper

Sophomore Naya Mukul’s mother, Mitra Kalita, is the Senior Vice President of CNN Digital. She oversees the news, opinions, and programming departments. Before working at CNN, Kalita served as president of the South Asian Journalist Association and attended many news conferences around the world. “We’ve been international, Belize and Mexico, and we go to India a lot because [relatives] live there,” Naya Mukul said. “We also [travel] around the country, most recently Atlanta.” When traveling, Kalita speaks at panels to share her experience with digital strategy. She shares her knowledge on how to gain traffic in start-ups or businesses, and how to maintain an online presence. She also discusses diversity in the workplace and sheds light on issues faced by women of color. Before coming to Stuyvesant, Naya Mukul found herself traveling more often

with her family. “Now, I just can’t because it’s a lot to even just miss one day of school,” Naya Mukul explained. “For example, my mom is going to Brazil pretty soon with my dad, but since we have school I can’t go.” Naya Mukul’s father, Nitin Mukul, is a mixed media artist who specializes in painting, graphic design, and video installations. He specializes in painting but creates videos of his artwork as well. “Whenever he has an exhibition in a gallery, he does video installations [showing] his process,” Naya Mukul explained. One of her father’s projects was painting ice and recording how it melted over time. Nitin Mukul previously had a studio in Long Island City, but after the building closed, he began working from home. “His easels, canvas, and everything are there. There’s a room on the top floor where he can work, and it has a lot of light,” she described. “He does a lot of animation and graphic design, so he also has a computer available for him, and it’s most convenient for him to work from home.” Naya Mukul described her father’s art style as being realistic. He creates graphics and animations for FOX News on television, as well as for The Wall Street Journal’s Snapchat. “His most recent project is a promo for this book called ‘People Like Us,’” Naya Mukul shared. “It’s about immigrants and the voting process.” His work in graphic design aims to promote businesses by giving them an image or a voice.

the schools, building the water supplies,” Cosmo Coen explained. “A lot of what my dad does is highlight the problems there [in third world countries] and raise awareness.” He has also worked on videos that show UNICEF’s impact over time. “He went to Mali once and talked about a big malnutrition problem, and five years later he came back and talked about things that UNICEF had been doing to combat that malnutrition.” Robert Coen’s videos are intended to show legislators and other countries what UNICEF is and explain its purpose, thereby encouraging others to open their doors

to the organization.

“It’s pretty common to not want to do the same thing as your parents do. You don’t want to grow up in the shadow of your parents necessarily. I could never imagine myself doing the same thing [my father] does, but I do think that I have been really lucky to get a unique perspective on how media works.” —Hugo Smith, junior

Hugo Smith Junior Hugo Smith’s father, Ben Smith, works in the media as the Editor-in-Chief of Buzzfeed. He is responsible for all of their news operations; he works on articles and oversees the live shows and videos published by the company. Hugo Smith cleared misconceptions about Buzzfeed: “I think what a lot of people don’t understand about Buzzfeed is, they do do real news. They do a lot of cat videos [...] and quizzes and such, but they do have real journalists, and they have journalists that won Pulitzers.” As a college student, Ben Smith became interested in the news and media sector and decided to use journalism to improve his ability to speak and socialize. “He was introverted growing up, and decided he wanted to get over that,” Hugo Smith elaborated. “He found the best way to [do] that was by talking to people and strangers, and that’s a lot of what journalism is.” After graduating from college, Ben Smith moved to Indianapolis to write for The Indianapolis Star, then moved to Latvia to write for The Baltic Times and Wall Street Journal Europe, before coming back

to the United States in the early 2000s. Shortly after returning, he wrote for various New York-based publications, including the New York Sun and the New York Observer. After a brief stint at Politico, Buzzfeed hired him as Editorin-Chief. In terms of Hugo Smith’s own experience with his father’s job, he reflected, “I don’t think it’s really affected my social life. Most people don’t really know or care what your parents do. When [my father] published the [Steele dossier] two years ago, that was interesting, and having conversations with my friends about that was interesting because I had a unique perspective on it.” Hugo Smith’s family has adapted to Ben Smith’s demanding and time-consuming job. “He really does his best to be around, which can be tough, because the news really doesn’t stop,” Hugo Smith said. “When he gets home from work, his job isn’t over. And he’s on his phone all the time; he lives on Twitter from what I can tell. When I can’t get through to him, I’ll just tweet at him, and he’ll respond.” Ben Smith also travels fair-

Zoe Oppenheimer / The Spectator

Matt Melucci / The Spectator

Naya Mukul

water access,” Cosmo Coen said. On the other side of the world, “He did a story in Guatemala of this girl who came to the United States with her father and then got deported. Her father is still in America but she was deported,” Cosmo Coen said. “He also went to Asia and Indonesia—again, for the children.” In addition to working as a journalist for the organization, Robert Coen creates promotional and informational videos about UNICEF’s missions. “A lot of it is to showcase the stuff that UNICEF is doing, because UNICEF are the people that are building

Matt Melucci / The Spectator

Senior Cosmo Coen’s father, Robert Coen, is a journalist who has previously worked with Cable News Network (CNN) and the British Broadcasting Corporation and now works with the United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF), an organization dedicated to protecting the rights of all children and making sure their basic needs are met. He traveled to over 66 countries and covered international war stories while working with CNN in the 1980s and 1990s. “In the nineties, he did a lot of the African independence wars,” Cosmo Coen said. “He covered Mozambique, he did Li-

ly frequently, though perhaps not as much as in the past. “He tries really hard to spend time with us, and I really appreciate it. I feel really lucky that I get to spend as much time with him as I do, even though I understand he’s really busy,” Hugo Smith said. At this point, Hugo Smith does not plan to pursue journalism. “I think it’s pretty common to not want to do the same thing as your parents do,” he said. “You don’t want to grow up in the shadow of your parents necessarily. I could never imagine myself doing the same thing he does, but I do think that I have been really lucky to get a unique perspective on how media works.”

“He’s gone to Central America. He did a story in Guatemala of this girl who came to the United States with her father and then got deported. Her father is still in America but she was deported, and that was a story that he did.” —Cosmo Coen, senior


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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Editorials Two Sides to Stuy Eighth graders from all around New York City, walking through Stuyvesant’s doors into its annual Open House event, are greeted with the jovial melodies of performances by the school band and by enthusiastic Big Sibs who introduce them to various areas of the institution. The night concludes with Principal Eric Contreras’s welcome speech in the Murray Khan Theater, where he introduces the rich academic and extracurricular life available to the student body. But the night’s presentations do not include Stuyvesant’s supposedly nonexistent school spirit and the hours of studying that prospective students often hear about. A more accurate presentation of Stuyvesant lies between these two extremes. It is partly the image presented at the Open House, where everything is sugar, spice, and everything nice, and it is partly a scene straight out of AMC’s “The Walking Dead.” Every year, prospective students ask questions about both sides of the spectrum. However, it is crucial to recognize that the imagined Stuyvesant experience varies for each student, carved by a unique set of decisions and mentalities.

Do Stuyvesant students really go to sleep at 2:00 a.m. every day? No, it’s actually 4:00 a.m. Usually, if you don’t procrastinate you should be able to get a good night’s sleep. How much homework do you get a night? Nine to ten hours.

How long your homework takes depends on your course load and your time management skills. If you have too many AP classes and you procrastinate, it very well might take you nine hours. However, if you understand your limitations and don’t get distracted, it should be more manageable.

How likely is it that I will have a 95 average? It’s not easy to get a 95 average, though it is possible. It is better to set realistic goals for yourself in terms of doing well in school, as well as doing the things you It doesn’t matter what the likelihood is. You have enjoy. Do a little bit every day to reach those goals. to have a 95 or you’re a failure.

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The questions asked at the Open House are fairly straightforward, but prospective students may receive very different responses depending on to whom they are talking. The cliché answer, “It’s hard, but it’s manageable” underplays the fact that being a Stuyvesant student requires much more effort than being a middle school student did. However, the “Stuy or Die” mentality morphs into an unhealthy mixture of competition, mistrust, stress, and even loathing, as some of New York City’s best students are left in the same environment to fight for the best grades. Or at least that’s how we come off to those outside our school. These traits exist at Stuyvesant, but they are not its defining characteristics. Not everyone will have a 95 average here, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth working toward. While asking about the likeliness of getting a good grade or what the teachers are like brings a certain assurance, prospective students should be reminded to ask themselves, “Will this be a meaningful experience for me?” While the course load will be heavy, often to the detriment of one’s sleep, there are so many aspects of Stuyvesant that complement these sides. It will be difficult not to find friends, supportive clubs, and classes that appeal to one’s interests, even niche ones. The Open House is important for students who are on the fence about coming to Stuyvesant. They already know about Stuyvesant’s reputation for harboring a cutthroat environment. Instead of listening to cliché, surface-level comments, we encourage prospective students to enter with an open state of mind and understand that the Stuyvesant experience is less about the influences it will cast on them than about what they make of it as an individual.

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Kerry Garfinkel for clarity and length. © 2019 The Spectator All rights reserved by the creators. *Managing Board **Editor-in-Training

Every teacher at Stuyvesant is qualified to teach here, and they put a lot of effort into their teaching. Do your best in class and be engaged and you will realize that Stuyvesant teachers are some of the best.

How are the students? Some students can be very goal-oriented, which is tough to deal with. So don’t. Look for other people. Other than that, Stuyvesant has the nicest, most talented, and caring people you will ever meet. Find a group of They’re really mean and only care about their friends that will push you to be your best while giving grades. you the necessary support.

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Tiffany Cao Amy Halder Irene Hao** Haley Huh** Brian Zhang

How are the teachers?

They are not good. They don’t give high grades.

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Omar Ali Abdulla Elkhadrawy Victor Kuang Olly Stewart

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Rebecca Collins Michael Hu Andrea Huang** Jade Lo

Dead Art


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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Opinions No, One Size Does Not Fit All By AYA ALRYYES

every picture, I’d believe you. Their body types are identical: flat stomachs, long and thin legs, wide hips, and small breasts. This is further reinforced by its Instagram page,

country, and you’ll see dozens of girls sporting its dresses, jewelry, skirts, and more. However, its impact reaches beyond what girls want on their bodies; it influences how girls want their bodies to look. From its products to its advertisements, Brandy Melville sends the message that to be accepted, you have to be skinny. A quick glance at its website reveals that all its models look exactly the same. If you were to tell me that Brandy Melville uses one model for

which features girls who look the same and have the aforementioned body type; many even look thin to the point of emaciation. It is not inherently wrong for a clothing brand to cater to one body type. Several brands, like Lane Bryant, which targets plus-size women, do this. What makes Brandy Melville’s extremely exclusionary advertising a problem is its “one size fits all” policy. “One size,” in this case, does not “fit all,” or even most. Brandy Melville’s sole size is the equivalence of

Sunjung Bok / The Spectator

I struggle with body image and insecurity. How I look is seldom far from my mind; I’m almost always thinking about whether my thighs look big in a certain pair of shorts or if my stomach looks flat in a certain dress. I am far from alone in this. Fifty-three percent of 13-yearold girls feel “unhappy with their bodies,” and this number balloons to 78 percent by the time they’re 17. The biggest culprit of this epidemic is the media, which advertises a certain universally accepted beauty standard for women. Anyone who does not fit that standard should buy this eye cream to fix those pesky wrinkles or these slimming tights to smooth those disgusting fat rolls. This standard, though, is unattainable. The “perfect woman” in the glossy magazines isn’t real; she was created with makeup and airbrushing. Thankfully, the problem is getting better. Many brands have realized that they need to update their practices to reflect the increasingly bodypositive world. The clothing retailer Aerie, for example, started the campaign #AerieREAL, in which it announced it would no longer retouch its models. Several others, like Loft and Anthropologie, have introduced a wider range of sizes in their stores, sending a message of inclusivity. Sadly, one brand has not taken part in this: the wildly popular and influential Brandy Melville.

Brandy Melville is a brand serving adolescent girls and young women, and its impact on teen fashion is undeniable: simply walk around Stuyvesant or any other high school in the

a size 0-2 or waist size 25. For reference, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) suggests that the average waist size for a teenage girl is about 32.6. Claiming that a size 0 “fits all” means that if you are not size 0, you are not welcome in this store. If you are not size 0, you are abnormal; you are not part of the acceptable “all.” This has significant implications for teenage girls. Being given the message that you are considerably overweight even if you are healthy can lower self-esteem and lead to body dysmorphia, a disorder in which you see yourself as having flaws that are imperceptible to others. This isn’t just speculation. Being a teenage girl myself, I can attest to the damaging nature of Brandy Melville’s one size fits all policy. The first and last time I set foot in the store, I was there with my cousin. I had heard about its discriminatory policy and had seen its Instagram page, and I knew it wouldn’t be good for me to go because of my issues with body image and insecurity. But I obliged my cousin, who loved to shop there, and went against my better judgment. As soon as I set foot inside the store, I felt a sort of disconnect between myself and everyone else there. I am of a healthy and average weight for my age group, but I felt absolutely gargantuan looking at all the skinny girls. It felt like some kind of club that I wasn’t good enough to be in. Still, I found some

clothes I liked and went to the dressing room, where I soon discovered that there was no way the clothes I had picked out could fit over my body without literally bursting at the seams. To be told that you are atypically overweight for not being able to fit into a size 0 is absurd, but at the time, all I could think about was what a disgusting freak I was for not being able to fit into clothes designed for everyone to be able to wear. I left the store in tears, and I didn’t eat anything for the rest of the day. Brandy Melville isn’t the only or the first brand to have a one size fits all policy. The difference is that other stores have clothes that genuinely fit all, like pants with elastic or drawstrings, while Brandy Melville’s clothes do not differ at all from regular sized clothes. Essentially, Brandy Melville designs a product, only produces a size 0 version, and claims it fits all. The only products that have sizes are their pants, and even those only come in Small and Medium. Though this is little in terms of inclusivity, it suggests that Brandy Melville, like any other brand, is at least capable of carrying multiple sizes. It should, of course, be expanded to a much wider range, to represent the wide range of body types. There is no one average size for a teenage girl, and claiming that a size 0 “fits all” is damaging to girls’ mental health and body image. It’s time for Brandy Melville to recognize that.

LinkedIn to Espionage: The Growing Chinese Threat By JUSTIN MURDOCK

Rivalry between the East and West is nothing new, but the last several decades have seen increasing conflict between China on the one hand and the U.S. and its allies on the other. In its bid to restore itself to its ancient glory as the “Middle Kingdom” of Asia and perhaps one day of the world, China has relentlessly sought to improve its technological prowess. In many cases, China has been accused of stealing Western technology by misappropriating trade secrets in business relationships, violating copyright and other intellectual property rights, and hacking into corporate and military networks to swipe anything that could help China catch up or gain an advantage. Now it seems that China is borrowing a page from Russia’s playbook by exploiting social media invented in the U.S. In the same way that Russia used Twitter and other social media platforms to stir up political passions and influence the 2016 presidential race, China is using social media in an attempt to recruit spies to boost its espionage efforts. Just as the U.S. cannot afford to turn a blind eye to Russian manipulation of its electoral process, it cannot ignore China’s efforts to carry out espionage through social media. The government and the private sector must work together in order to effectively counter this threat. Evidence suggests that Chinese agents are increasingly turning to social media, such as LinkedIn, as hunting grounds for new intelligence assets are piling up. For example, White

House official and diplomat Brett Bruen, who worked in the Obama administration, was befriended on LinkedIn by an individual purporting to be Donna Alexander from the California Institute of Technology, who supposedly had connections to other White House officials—many of whom were involved with the U.S. government’s foreign policy infrastructure. “Donna” proceeded to offer to fly him to China for a “well-paid” opportunity, but he decided to decline the offer. The offer

istry official, faced recruitment efforts on LinkedIn from a user under the alias of Grace Woo in 2011. After a series of exchanges, in which “Grace” learned that Parello-Plesner was going to visit Beijing soon, she suggested that he stop by Hangzhou to meet with the DRHR, a headhunting company that she supposedly worked for; they agreed on meeting in the St. Regis Hotel. When Parello-Plesner arrived in China, he was guided by a young man from the DRHR to a conference room where three mid-

French individuals through LinkedIn, according to German and French intelligence, which shows a rising threat, to say the least. While LinkedIn has a policy of shutting down accounts used to deceive other LinkedIn users, LinkedIn cannot shut down all such accounts by itself; in many cases, someone has to alert LinkedIn of the problem. The problem Chinese exploitation of LinkedIn or other social media poses is one of social engineering—not an issue of hacking; all of the cy-

The right balance needs to be struck so that governments and companies achieve their goals without unduly restricting civil liberties or giving the spies too much leeway. immediately set off a sea of alerts: first, the profile picture was of actress Sarah Roemer, and second, a spokeswoman from the Institute had no such record of a “Donna Alexander.” If the situation wasn’t handled as carefully as it had been, Bruen could have ended up leaking confidential, crucial information about the U.S. government, which could have led to cybernetic onslaughts, especially during the ongoing U.S.-China trade war. While the U.S. has been the prime target of such fake social media efforts by China, China has also gone after the Western allies of the U.S. using similar methods. Jonas ParelloPlesner, a Danish Foreign Min-

dle-aged men—and no Grace Woo—greeted him. Immediately, he saw a red flag: the men claimed to have come from a government research organization but did not have any business cards. The men then promised ParelloPlesner that if he’d work with them, they’d fund his research and provide him “really great access to the Chinese system.” Parello-Plesner concluded that they were Chinese intelligence officials and reported the incident to Danish officials. Apparently, this scheme was only the tip of the iceberg: the DRHR and a few other companies have implemented efforts to contact approximately 10,000 German and 4,000

bersecurity technology in the world wouldn’t make any real difference. The key to solving the problem is to bring as many human resources as possible to counter the threat. There needs to be greater concerted efforts between the government and private sector; they must use all of the resources at their disposal to shut down these illegitimate efforts. This means that government intelligence agencies, government entities, privately-owned companies whose employees may be the target of Chinese spies, and social media companies need to come together to share whatever information they have so that fake accounts used by Chinese spies are shut

down expeditiously. Organizations like the DRHR should not be allowed free rein, and once a few suspicious incidents have been identified, the offending account should be shut down immediately. Perhaps Chinese spies can engage in a game of whack-a-mole by setting up new organizations and accounts as soon as an old one is identified, but concerted, sustained efforts in sharing information by all of the targets should make responding to such games easier. The right balance needs to be struck so that the governments and companies can achieve their goals without unduly restricting civil liberties or giving the spies too much leeway. With this balance in mind, the communication between governments and companies is crucial in order to curtail misuse of social media platforms for espionage. The practical implication of this is that the government should share what it knows with companies so they can take action, but not to the point where it might compromise its methods and sources to gather intelligence. Conversely, social media companies should encourage users who have been the targets of espionage to share what they know with the government. However, sharing information with the government should be voluntary to preserve privacy and civil liberties. This way, social media can be used how it was intended to without benefiting the spies or fostering Big Brother.


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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Opinions

Emma Donnelly / The Spectator

What Failure Teaches You That Success Can’t

By CLAIRE SHIN It all started at the end of freshman year. It was the last day of school, and I vividly remember sitting in Japanese teacher Chie Helinski’s homeroom, my foot nervously bouncing up and down, while I tried in vain to not think about report cards. The room was buzzing, and everyone was talking about their grades, but since my last name starts with an S, I knew the excruciating wait for my transcript would be longer than that

By LAMIA HAQUE

It’s true that some people will be blessed with easy teachers and that others will have to self-study physics from their own textbooks. I sometimes wanted to scream with rage, knowing that if I’d only gotten a different teacher, half the effort would have rewarded me with double the points. I boiled with self-pity, often asking myself, “Why me?” The truth is, there is no why; or as we Gen Z-ers like to say: “It be like that.” As Cheryl Strayed so rightfully wrote in the advice column The Rumpus, you don’t have a right to the cards you believe you should have been dealt, but you do have an obligation to play the hell out of the ones you’ve been holding. I wish I had a perfectly apt epiphany, encapsulated in a single, inspirational moment, to conclude this narrative. But I don’t. I only came to the single, most important realization of my sophomore year after I fell so short of my expectations that I was on the verge of giving up, and no individual occasion could realistically capture the slow destruction of my willpower. I doubted myself. I stopped thinking rationally and listened to the very emotionally-based voice in my mind that constantly whispered, “What’s the point if you’re just going to do badly regardless of whether you study or not?” “You could save yourself so much heartbreak if you just let go.” I almost did. I had to reconsider how much I wanted a good GPA, and I realized that I wanted it a lot. I wanted it so much that I had to cross “giving up” out of my options list. I had to stop listening to my wounded self-esteem and make logical choices. If I was doing poorly on my Spanish tests because my current study habits were ineffective, then I would have to change my study routine again and again until I was satisfied with the results. I had no alternative but to accept the inevitability of the mis-

A Climate Conflict in the Golden State

tional policies on climate change. As of now, 13 other states have followed California’s tailpipe greenhouse gas standards, including New York, New Jersey, Connecticut, Massachusetts, and Pennsylvania. Any proposed or actual loosening of California’s standards will have environmental impacts far beyond the borders of the state itself—indeed, the effects would be felt on a national scale. The Trump administration invoked a two-part automobile emissions rule with the first section revoking California’s waiver under the Clean Air Act. The second section, however, has not yet been decided. It will involve setting future fuel efficiency standards for emissions starting in 2025. The administration wants this rule to go into effect in order to “create more jobs,” “improve highway safety,” produce “far less expensive and safer cars,” and put together “environmentally friendly cars.” Much like Trump’s other claims, these are unwarranted and highly unlikely to succeed. The federal government has no reasonable explanation for how this new rule will create more jobs or improve highway safety, but what’s clear is that it will make cars less safe and more expensive and will have countless negative effects on the environment. Under the Obama administration, California’s rule was created to build vehicles that achieve an average fuel economy of 54.5 miles per gallon by 2025, which would cut over six billion

tons of carbon dioxide pollution. Considering the fact that tailpipe pollution is the United States’ largest source of planet-warming greenhouse gas emissions, this rule would largely mitigate effects of climate change. Each gallon of gasoline would also last for a much longer distance, which translates to less money spent on

polluted atmosphere. According to the Environmental Protection Agency, the United States’ fuel consumption would increase by about half a million barrels per day. By keeping California from controlling its own gas pollution, the federal government also sets a precedent for its involvement in

gasoline. The SAFE Vehicles Rule, however, would accomplish the exact opposite of many of these positive effects. It will lower the requirement for average fuel economy to 37 miles per gallon, leading to higher rates of carbon pollution and an increase in gas prices. There are over 35 million vehicles in California alone, and combined with the vehicles in the other 13 states that follow California’s waiver, millions of automobiles will require more gasoline and will release tons of tailgate pollution into an already

state governments’ affairs. In the United States, the federal, state, and local governments have their own (sometimes overlapping) powers, but each level has its own defined jurisdiction. By removing California’s waiver on emission standards, the federal government will be taking power away from California’s state legislature and its governor. Groups of Republicans have supported Trump on this issue without thinking about how it would affect states’ rights and upset the balance between the different levels of government. This would prevent

Susannah Ahn / The Spectator

On Wednesday, September 18, 2019, President Donald Trump sent out a tweet stating that his administration would be pursuing the Safer Affordable Fuel-Efficient Vehicles Rule (SAFE Vehicles Rule) with the goal of “revoking California’s Federal Waiver on emissions” on September 18, 2019. The SAFE Vehicles Rule would amend fuel economy, tailpipe emissions for cars and light trucks in the state, and establish new standards for model years 2021 through 2026, drastically affecting California’s current emission policies. California’s federal waiver began in 1970 with the Clean Air Act, which granted California the right to set its own rules on climate-warming automobile emissions, or tailpipe emissions. The Golden State already had clean air legislation, making its strict standards on emissions the next step to halting climate change. California’s standards are far stricter than federal standards and are an important aspect of the state’s environmental policy. The state is more stringent on hydrocarbon and nitrogen oxide (NOx) emissions, and its cars’ gasoline has less sulfur, benzene, and hydrocarbons than most gasoline in the United States. There is also a number of motor vehicle emission classifications in California, most of which mandate zero evaporative emissions, which occur when fuel evaporates while a car is idle. These standards have influenced national and interna-

of most other kids in my homeroom. When Ms. Helinski finally called out my name, I got up, swallowed nervously, and walked over to her desk, all the while actively keeping a straight face as I cracked open the folded paper and took a small peek. To my surprise, my average was exceedingly higher than I’d expected. “Dr. Barrow blessed my grade!” I practically yelled to a friend who sat beside me. “Dang,” he laughed. “Wish she blessed me.”

When I went home that day, I was ecstatic. I couldn’t help but be reminded of the warnings of almost every upperclassman I’d met so far—that at Stuyvesant, most kids fell flat on their faces, their grades plummeting from middle school. But I’d gone and received a grade higher than I ever predicted. I thought for a second that maybe, just maybe, I was smart. Come sophomore year, I had to deal with a whole new set of expectations for myself. In my mind, I had succeeded the year before, and everyone said that this year would be a breeze, so I had no reason not to do well. I truly believed that I was smart. I believed that I was capable of doing well in my classes despite their difficulty because I’d pull through somehow. It had happened last year, and I was sure it would happen again. I lacked a plan. I thought that even if I didn’t work hard, some high school fairy would come and bless my grade, as some teachers did for me during my freshman year. As the school year progressed, I started to panic. I felt hopelessly lost in computer science. I was completely unused to my chemistry teacher’s lecturing style. Spanish tests turned from simple memorization to difficult writing questions that forced me to think. When testing season came by, I was hammered by loss after loss. I broke a few laughably tragic records when it came to academic assessments: lowest test score ever, lowest quiz score ever. With each low grade, I pushed myself further and further down an abyss of despair. I had no idea how to pull myself out of it; I was repeating the same study routine that succeeded in my freshman year, but now, I was getting obliterated by difficult test questions. I blamed it on “hard teachers.” I blamed the programming office. I blamed the workload. I blamed everyone but myself.

takes I would make along the way. I will proudly tell the world that I got a 77 on my first CS test or that I once carried a chemistry quiz bearing the mark 1/3 home in my bright blue folder-for-everything. Because what the world doesn’t know is that I got both assessments dropped, and after working like a machine into the AM’s, practicing Python scripts and balancing equations, I pulled my final grades up further than I ever could have hoped. Society is filled with half-baked truths, and there is a larger story to everything, known or not. I had to endure the judgmental glances of those who once believed I was a “scholar,” but it is impossible to escape judgment based on these fragments of reality, so do yourself a favor and let the haters hate. Instead of letting them affect you, focus on your own faults and fix them the only way you know how: by seeking help, working harder, and changing your habits. No “high school fairy” will do that for you. If I could go back in time to sophomore year program changes, I wouldn’t, despite the possibility of my grade becoming significantly higher. I didn’t see it then, but failing over and over and over again has helped me realize—as cliché as it sounds—the value of hard work. It humbled me and showed me how resilient, intelligent, and diligent many Stuyvesant students are. It taught me that success will only come to you if you really truly want it—in Stuyvesant and the real world. It showed me that everyone else at Stuyvesant was in the same boat as I was; my case wasn’t special, and I was actually relatively lucky with the teachers I had. It forced me to re-think my work ethic and virtually eliminate procrastination from my life through sheer selfmotivation and willpower. Now that’s something that perfect grades can’t give you.

states from contributing money and effort to the movement to combat climate change, arguably one of the biggest international issues today. In terms of future implications, the decision on California’s emission standards can move to the Supreme Court, which can permanently keep states from regulating greenhouse gas pollution from vehicles. With one national standard for greenhouse gas pollution, urban states with significantly more vehicles will be emitting far more carbon dioxide pollution. The outcome will also split the United States automobile market, with some states adhering to stricter pollution standards than others. States with vehicles supporting only 37 miles per gallon would experience a period of lower profits, hurting local economies in a substantial way. It will be especially difficult for automakers, who oversee the building of these new vehicles, to keep up with interstate differences in environmental regulations when trying to market to as many consumers as possible. In a world where climate change strikes are orchestrated across the globe, it is quite unusual for the United States, one of the most powerful countries in the world, to further worsen the effects of climate change. Not only will the SAFE Vehicles Rule have negative environmental impacts on the entire nation, but it will also damage the legitimacy and stature of the United States federal government.


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

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Opinions By JOSHUA GINDIS In his farewell address, President George Washington demonstrated hope that political parties would never form in the newly established United States of America. In Federalist Papers No. 9 and 10, Alexander Hamilton and James Madison wrote of the dangers of political factions. The founding fathers never intended for American politics to be defined by partisanship and ideology. And yet today, the two-party system of Democrats and Republicans is practically mandated by law. It was Hamilton and Madison— the very men who had advocated so adamantly against political factionalism—who headed the first true American political organizations: the Federalists and the Anti-Federalists. The fundamental difference between these parties was their stance on states’ rights. The former advocated for a powerful central government, and the latter for self-governance on the state level. That was centuries ago; today, the parties and the issues that define American politics are different, but the basic division of gov-

Crashing the Party

ernance into two camps remains. The apparent advantage of a party system is that it allows likeminded people to collaborate to achieve common goals. However, this assumes that each party is united by one cohesive dogma. This could not be further from the truth; within the parties, there are so many dramatic ideological differences that this point is moot. For instance, the Democratic Party suffers from the extreme division of its moderate and progressive constituents. Progressivism has become a staple of the Democratic Party. As the party moves further left with no end in sight, moderate Democrats are left behind in the dust, feeling ostracized within their own party. Furthermore, the ideals of modern liberalism are often conflated with the ideals of the Democratic Party, much as conservatism is often conflated with Republicanism. The fact of the matter is, conservative Democrats and liberal Republicans do exist. At their very cores, the two parties rather resemble the Anti-Federalist and Federalist parties; each is defined by its stance on states’ rights.

Though conservative and liberal ideas tend to overlap significantly with their respective parties, these words lack the precision necessary to describe an individual’s entire ideology in depth. Another drawback of the party system is that uninformed or apathetic voters may cast their ballot in favor of the party with which they are affiliated without even understanding what their candidate stands for. Voters often lack understanding of what exactly it is that their parties represent, let alone a candidate’s personal set of beliefs. In order to truly understand what a politician’s agenda consists of, voters must educate themselves on individual candidates rather than make generalizations based on party affiliations. Not only this, but the support for the two-party model inherent in the American system also renders independent voters (who, according to a Gallup poll, outnumber both their Democratic and Republican counterparts) unlikely to vote for their preferred candidate. It is unfortunate, but many regard voting independent as throwing away one’s vote.

From Detention to Detention Center: America’s School-to-Prison Pipeline

By RAE SEONG JEONG

One out of every four African American boys born today can expect to go to prison in his lifetime. Black children are five times as likely to be incarcerated as white youth, and the overall racial disparity between black and white students in custody has increased by 22 percent since 2001. One of the starkest narratives of the American education system is the gradual transition from detention in school years to detention centers in adulthood. Unfortunately, this school-toprison pipeline narrative is as prevalent as it is discouraging; for tens of thousands of school districts in the United States, educational disenfranchisement is an institutionalized norm. And it stems from the way public schools are funded. Nationally, school funding is sourced overwhelmingly from the local property tax, which is a real estate-based tax that generates revenue from land value. Thus, the wealthiest districts with the highest property values ultimately generate the most revenue for school funding. It explains why school districts that serve large populations of poor students have historically received the short end of the stick in terms of school resources, like qualified teachers, advanced courses, and guidance counselors. This trend has grown to an unprecedented scale; in fact, in more than

white school districts are significantly better funded. In fact, in 2016, overwhelmingly white school districts received $23 billion more in funding than their nonwhite counterparts despite serving roughly the same number of students. Unsurprisingly, these funding disparities have a profound effect on academic proficiency. Nationally, on one end, the majority of the wealthiest districts have at least a 95 percent graduation rate, while on the other end, only two of the 10 poorest districts have graduation rates higher than 75 percent. In some states, literacy rates have even been found to differ between these districts by up to 32 percent. Unfortunately, when students are less academically proficient, incarceration rates rise. Schools that serve disproportionately high populations of academically unsuccessful students take more punitive and in most cases, violent disciplinary action; in such schools, juvenile incarceration rates have tripled. In addition, those incarcerated students are 41 percent more likely to be incarcerated again by adulthood. Here, the school-to-prison pipeline finally becomes clear: a systematic educational discrepancy directly leads to disproportionate black populations in prison. It becomes clear that stratified wealth disparities across the country fuel an equally inconsistent criminal justice system. It becomes clear that it isn’t the

One of the starkest narratives of the American education system is the gradual transition from detention in school years to detention centers in adulthood. half of the states, the poorest school districts don’t receive adequate funding to address their students’ needs. In Illinois, for example, the poorest districts received 22 percent less in state and local funding than the wealthiest. But this shortchanger of educational financing seems to exclusively target black students. That’s because communities in predominantly white areas tend to be wealthier; school districts’ funding depends on the value of the local property and the ability of residents to pay higher taxes, and so predominantly

students to blame—it’s the lackluster educational policy that disenfranchises students before they can even begin to read that should be held responsible. However, existing efforts have consistently failed to solve the problem. In New York City, local legislators enacted a new “Fair Student Funding” formula back in 2007 as a way to send more money to schools with the neediest students. Its primary provision dictates that schools receive extra money for students who are poor, struggling academically, disabled, or learning English. But another

provision effectively does the opposite: the formula also rewards certain selective schools like Stuyvesant High School or the Bronx High School of Science under the premise that high-achieving students need extra attention to reach their full potential. More than a dozen elite high schools get about $1000 extra per student through the formula. Overall, since 2012, these schools have garnered over $100 million more in revenue than other schools. But it’s well known that these schools tend to enroll relatively small shares of black and Hispanic students; in fact, just this year, Stuyvesant High School had a record low of a mere seven black students enrolled in their freshman class out of 895 seats. Elite schools like Stuyvesant High School or the Bronx High School of Science are no exception to the longstanding propagation of racial disparity. States like Indiana and Michigan, on the other hand, have taken steps to reform education funding. The solution lies in more state-level oversight: while states have yet to completely eliminate the use of property taxes for revenue, some have reduced their reliance on them. In Indiana and Michigan, the state governments took on substantially larger roles in distributing the property tax revenue to schools, shifting local district oversight to that of the state. This means that the state sets the tax rates, ceilings, or floors for local school districts. As a result, the distribution of funding across districts, regardless of wealth or demographic, became relatively more equitable. The U.S. federal government should follow suit; by mandating state-level oversight across the country in districts like Texas’s San Perlita, where the median household income is less than a third of the national average, or New York City’s elite Stuyvesant High School, where only one percent of its freshman class is black. Only then can education begin to go hand in hand with equity. But any movement to enact change in the system ends with the national spotlight. It ends with students, teachers, and legislators alike understanding that the racial disparities in education, our criminal justice system, and society as a whole has its roots in institutionalized funding discrepancies. It ends when the pen trumps the penitentiary.

American elections are based around a model of “first past the post” politics—essentially, a winner-take-all system. Independent voters, who are far more sparsely located throughout the country than either Republicans or Democrats, stand little chance of winning any elections, which only serves to further perpetuate the idea that voting Independent is a lost cause. Possibly the greatest weakness of any party system is the inherent tribalism it inspires. Rather than assembling like-minded people and encouraging cooperation, parties facilitate the development of a sense of belonging within one’s party, and therefore, a disdain for the opposition. Rather than bringing together the people of our country in both their agreements and quarrels, the two-party system promotes a sense of “self ” against “other,” from which no average citizen benefits. Unfortunately, attempting moderation in politics, though laudable, often leads to more conflict than collaboration. Senator Joe Manchin should have received commendation for attempting to work with Re-

publican lawmakers to achieve their common goals. Instead, he was met with backlash. Senator Susan Collins should have been praised for her willingness to vote with Democrats rather than blindly supporting her party. Instead, she was shunned by Democrats and Republicans alike. Were the two-party system done away with, voters would no longer be able to lean on the crutch that is party affiliation when choosing a candidate to support. Furthermore, seats of office in the federal government would no longer be virtually unattainable to independent candidates. Though political unions and organizations will inevitably arise in some shape or form, abolishing parties would diminish factionalism significantly. So long as political parties oppose one another, they will only grow more polarized. So as long as political parties exist, the political climate in America will remain hostile and unproductive. If we hope to come together as a country rather than cater to parties that do not represent the people, we must abolish the two-party system which presently dominates our government.

Will the Saudi Strikes Lead to Another Endless War? By MATTHEW QIU Two weeks ago, cruise missiles struck one of Saudi Arabia’s most productive crude oil facilities, rendering the location inoperable and dealing a blow to the country’s dominant oil industry. Though Houthi rebels in neighboring Yemen took full responsibility for the attack, the technological and strategic sophistication of the strike raised international concerns that one of the kingdom’s neighbors, Iran, was actually responsible for the attack. Tensions between Iran and Saudi Arabia—strained ever since the former’s Islamic Revolution in 1979 ushered in an aggressively expansionist and religious government—have now reached a boiling point, drawing the attention of other major powers. Though Iran has denied involvement and the Houthi rebels, who rely on Iranian support in their prolonged struggle against the Saudi-backed Yemeni government, have claimed responsibility, both the U.S. and Saudi Arabia have pointed fingers at Iran for the attack. This incident has followed a chain of recent escalatory actions in the region, such as the shooting down of an unmanned U.S. drone and several seizures of oil tankers in the Persian Gulf. The alleged role of the Houthi rebels in the attack is part of a larger picture regarding power struggles in the region, specifically concerning the Yemen War. The Houthi rebels and pro-Hadi forces are backed by Iran and Saudi Arabia, respectively. The situation in Yemen is viewed as an extension of the Saudi-Iran proxy conflict and has drawn international ire for the civilian casualties and humanitarian crisis the civil war has created; thousands of civilians have been cut off from critical infrastructure and services like clean water, electricity, health care, and food. This source of friction is compounded by the continued U.S. military presence in the region. They have provided logistical support to Saudi-backed forces in addition to continuing arms sales to Saudi Arabia that directly fund the Yemen war. Furthermore, the withdrawal from the Iran nuclear deal—an Obama-era agreement which removed sanctions on the beleaguered country in exchange for a halt to its nuclear program—did no favors for stability in the region. Now with the announcement of a deployment of U.S. troops to Saudi Arabia in response to the oil facility drone attacks, the U.S. finds itself on the verge of being drawn back into the Middle East once more. The characterization of the deployment as “defensive” in nature is reminiscent of the deployment of U.S. troops to Saudi Arabia during the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait in 1990, an action which led to the First Gulf War. The situation risks a repeat of history with U.S. intervention and subsequent desta-

bilization in the Middle East. It also puts another question on the table, specifically about the U.S.’s unwavering commitment to Saudi Arabia even in the face of events such as the assassination of Jamal Khashoggi and the continuation of the Yemen war. U.S. arms sales to Saudi Arabia have been vital in maintaining Saudi Arabia’s ability to continue its violation of international law. The Senate has already passed a resolution to block new arms sales to Saudi Arabia, sponsored by Democratic senator Bob Menendez. But even though the resolution cut across partisan lines— which was also co-sponsored by Republican senators Lindsey Graham and Rand Paul—it was unfortunately not enough to override Trump’s veto. Nevertheless, the U.S. should take concrete steps to re-evaluate its commitment to Saudi Arabia and seek to resolve the Yemen war before civilian deaths and suffering increase even more. The renegotiation of the U.S.-Saudi alliance should entail clear conditions upon which the two must agree on before continuing their cooperation. The U.S. and Saudi Arabia may have concluded that the true perpetrator of the drone strikes was Iran, but the evidence has not conclusively proved the exact location of the launch site. There’s little incentive for Iran to so overtly sabotage Saudi’s oil fields, considering their desire to avoid a damaging military conflict. This moment proves a decisive point in the U.S.’s foreign policy regarding the Middle East. Its presence as a supposed stabilizing force must be called into question, and the U.S. should renegotiate with Iran on diplomatic terms instead of its current hardline antagonistic attitude that has imposed sanction after sanction on Iran. Inter-state cooperation is in the interest of all involved parties, and returning to the negotiation table with Iran and reforming our alliance with Saudi Arabia are starting point issues. America’s role in prolonging and worsening the effects of the war in Yemen must also be addressed. The U.S. currently employs end-use monitoring in all of its arms sales to foreign governments as a means of overseeing the use of these weapons post-sale and ensuring that they are not employed in a way that could be characterized as a dangerous misuse or a threat to U.S. security. The expansion of this oversight of weapons that cause humanitarian crises like that of the Yemen War would be an important step in ensuring that U.S. weapons are not used to perpetuate such conflicts of terrible violence. Furthermore, conditioning our arms sales to other nations could create the checks needed to regulate the use of U.S.-sold arms and prevent future instances of humanitarian disasters like the situation in Yemen. These steps pave the way for more sweeping possibilities of change in the region.


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Page 12

Opinions Free Speech Only Goes So Far: The Banning of Omar and Tlaib Was Justified By MAYA DUNAYER

The Israeli government has recently gone under fire for preventing two American congress members, Rashida Tlaib and Ilhan Omar, from entering Israel on a congressional trip. The controversy began with Tlaib’s organization of a “Trip to Palestine” that did not include meetings with any Israeli representatives, making the trip seem very one sided and very focused on a Palestinianoriented agenda rather than one of understanding the precarious situation in Israel. The two representatives were originally granted approval to enter Israel, but the approval was later rescinded after President Trump tweeted that allowing the two representatives to enter the country would “show great weakness.” Tlaib later requested to enter the country on a humanitarian basis, as she wanted to visit her ninety year old grandmother in the West Bank. After being granted this liberty, Tlaib stated that she would not be visiting the country after all, because “visiting my grandmother under these oppressive conditions stands against everything I believe in – fighting against racism, oppression & injustice.” Though some believe that the two representatives should be allowed into the country, it is unfair to expect Israel to allow people who are dangerous to the well-being of the state into the country. The two representatives are known supporters of BDS, an organization that threatens the Israeli government. The movement, whose acronym stands for Boycott, Divestment, and Sanctions, claims that it will continue to engage in various forms of boycotts, including academic, business, and cultural boycotts, until Israel meets what the campaign considers to be its obligations under international law. This, to BDS, means that Israel must withdraw from all territories it occupied during the Six Day War, remove the barrier separating the West Bank and the rest of Israel, give Arab-Palestinian citizens more rights, and allow Palestinian refugees to return to their pre-1948 properties. BDS also considers Israel to be an apartheid state similar to South Africa from 1948 to 1991, and claims to be equivalent to the South African

freedom fighters. Though BDS does have its Jewish supporters, the movement has a history of anti-Semitism and anti-Zionism. Ilhan Omar and Rashida Tlaib both currently serve in the US House of Representatives. Omar represents Minnesota’s 5th congressional district, while Tlaib represents Michigan’s 13th. Both representatives have a history of offensive remarks that seem to

As the issue of BDS boycotts grew greater, the Israeli government passed the Law for Prevention of Damage to State of Israel through Boycott in 2011. Passed by the Israeli Knesset, the law states that any individual or organization who publicly calls for an academic, economic, or cultural boycott against any person or entity affiliated with the State of Israel or against any institute or

Though the two do have free speech rights, free speech only goes far, and when a serious danger to the Israeli economy, academic institutions, and culture is at stake, the State of Israel has every right to protect itself. target Jews, though both claim that they were not intentionally anti-Semitic. For example, Tlaib criticized Senators Marco Rubio and Jim Risch for proposing proIsrael legislation by saying that Rubio and Risch “forgot what country they represent.” Though Rubio and Risch are not Jewish, many Jewish groups took offense at Tlaib’s statement, particularly the Anti-Defamation League, which stated that, “though the legislation discussed is sponsored by four non-Jewish Senators, any charge of dual loyalty has special sensitivity and resonance for Jews, particularly in an environment of rising anti-Semitism.” This idea of dual loyalty suggests that Jews are more loyal to their religion than to whatever country they reside in; it has been used to scapegoat Jews and pit them against their countries of residence. Omar’s anti-Semitic remarks are a bit less ambigious. In 2012, Omar came under fire for a tweet that read, “Israel has hypnotized the world, may Allah awaken the people and help them see the evil doings of Israel,” a seeming reference to the anti-Semitic trope of the Jew as “the hypnotic conspirator,” in the words of the New York Times’s Bari Weiss. Aside from these instances, both representatives are also critical of the Israeli government, and are strong supporters of the BDS movement.

region under the control of the Israeli government can be sued by anyone who claims he or she would have been damaged by the proposed boycott. The law also allows for Israeli authorities to deny benefits, including but not limited to tax exemptions and participation in government contracts, to any individual or organization that publicizes or obliges to participation in a boycott. The law is currently still in place, save for a clause that allowed compensation payments to be imposed even if no damages were proven; this clause was unanimously struck down by the Supreme Court of Israel in 2015. Because the law stands and would take effect in the event of a BDS protest in Israel, the Israeli government’s move to ban Rashida Tlaib and Ilhan Omar from entering the country makes sense, as the government only wanted to protect itself from the imminent BDS protests that Tlaib and Omar would have been a part of. Though the two representatives and their supporters claim that the two were simply planning to observe and understand the political climate of Israel, it is clear that this is not the case, as shown by their affiliation with Miftah, a viciously anti-Semitic group. Miftah has a long history of posting anti-Semitic content on their website, which they explain

Breaking Trump’s Monopoly on Immigration Policy

By AARON VISSER

There is a reason that Donald Trump is our president: the abject failure of the Democratic party to truly embrace the significance of immigration policy as a campaign issue. Immigration is one of the three most important issues to Americans according to a Gallup poll, along with healthcare and the economy. Hillary Clinton let Donald Trump consolidate a monopoly over immigration’s media presence and reporting in 2016; her campaign essentially let Trump dictate the path that the issue took in the minds of the American people and failed to establish an original platform on immigration other than “the opposite of what Trump wants.” It was a failure of communication, responsibility, and plain old politics, and it ultimately led to Clinton’s loss in the general election. But it seems that the Democratic candidates of the 2020 election will make the same mistake again. They have hardly mentioned the subject in the debates; instead, they have criticized Trump’s policies as racist and promised healthcare to undocumented immigrants (a position already being used in attack ads across national programming). Republicans constantly and falsely accuse Democrats of supporting an

open border in the Southern states, and yet the many “progressive” candidates have done next to nothing to dispel this accusation. If Democrats can’t address the question of immigration, President Trump will, without a doubt, win a second presidential term. To begin with, Democrats should heavily emphasize the countless benefits that immigration provides for the United States. Immigrants can do the jobs that many Americans don’t want to do—like picking fruits and working in slaughterhouses—forming the bedrock of the nation’s economy. They boost population growth in a country with a stagnating birth rate (a phenomenon shared by many Western or Westernized countries) and add their unique and diverse cultures to the famed American melting pot. It’s clear that America relies on immigrants, but an equally important point is that immigrants rely on America. This country’s infrastructure, technology, and overall quality of life are a tremendous improvement for the millions of migrants from Central and South America who flee instability, gang violence, and a never-ending cycle of poverty. Though the two-way benefits of immigration are obvious, 80 percent of Americans believe we should be able to vet those who wish to enter

our country and want secure borders. The Democratic candidates haven’t gotten the memo. Over half the candidates currently running have said they would eliminate penalties for border crossings. In addition, all of them promised amnesty to immigrants who weren’t criminals. This is hugely unpopular with Americans: 77 percent think illegal immigration is a critical problem, and 83 percent believe America should tighten its border security. These developments all point to a popular perception that Democrats would rather pander to a relative minority of radical progressives than their more moderate base, which numbers in the tens of millions across the country. The party can end that impression with just a few simple steps. They must recognize that a nation has the right to control its borders to a certain extent. They must recognize that illegal immigration isn’t a rising tide which lifts all boats and that it has the real ability to suppress wages among the very constituents who are struggling most in the economy. Democrats must show a certain level of commitment to back up those statements. They should actively seek to talk about the problem. If Democrats could do that, they will break Trump’s monopoly on his winning issue.

away as merely attacks on Israel rather than attacks on the Jewish people. The first clear instance of anti-Semitism on the Miftah website was when the group promoted the age-old conspiracy theory of blood libel by accusing “the Jews [of using] the blood of Christians in the Jewish Passover.” After outraged cries from both pro and anti Israel groups, the group claimed the accusations were part of a “smear campaign” against Israel. The next incident of anti-Semitism on the site came when the group published an American Neo-Nazi Party treatise titled “Who Rules America: The Alien Grip on Our News and Entertainment Media Must Be Broken.” This piece, which was originally written by National Vanguard (a white nationalist group based in Charlottesville) charges extreme Jewish control over the media and states that eradicating all the Jews is the only way to free the nation from that “poison.” The group has also celebrated multiple anti-Semitic and anti-Israel terrorists. In 2011, a Miftah contributor, in an article titled “Let Us Honor Our Own,” described Dalal Al Mughrabi as “a Palestinian fighter who was killed during a military operation against Israel in 1978” and as a “national hero to the Palestinian people.” Dalal Al Mughrabi was responsible for the murder of 38 Israelis, including 13 children, in an attack known as the 1978 Coastal Massacre. Miftah also described suicide bomber Wafa Idrees as “the beginning of a string of Palestinian women dedicated to sacrificing their lives for the cause.” It is clear that the group with which Tlaib and Omar were going to be touring Israel is much more than simply a supporter of Palestine; it is a sadistically anti-Semitic group with no respect for the Jewish people whatsoever. Despite having a clear alliance with an anti-Semitic group, Rashida Tlaib was given the opportunity to visit her grandmother in the West Bank after she wrote a letter to the Israeli government requesting a humanitarian visit. The Israeli government told Tlaib that she could visit her grandmother as long as she “committed to accept all the demands of Israel to respect the restrictions imposed on her in the visit, and she also promised not to advance boycotts against Israel during

her visit.” Tlaib later announced that she would not be visiting her grandmother because, “visiting my grandmother under these oppressive conditions meant to humiliate me would break my grandmother’s heart.” This justifiably led many, including myself, to believe that Tlaib only requested the visit in order to attack the Israeli government further. One of the biggest parts of the controversy is that Netanyahu’s decision to originally allow the two representatives into the country seems to have changed solely based on Trump’s tweet. The tweet read, “It would show great weakness if Israel allowed Rep. Omar and Rep.Tlaib to visit. They hate Israel & all Jewish people, & there is nothing that can be said or done to change their minds. Minnesota and Michigan will have a hard time putting them back in office. They are a disgrace!” Though I do not agree with the way that the President worded his tweet, there is a grain of truth present in the statement. Based on their alliance with BDS and Miftah, as well as comments the two have previously made, it is clear that the two accept antiSemitism and the idea that Israel should not exist. Though “hate” is a strong word, it is clear that the two have these sentiments to some degree. But their political views are not the true problem here. Israel is not barring these representatives because they are pro-Palestine, or because they have spoken out against Israel. Israel is barring these representatives because of the high risk that a boycott will ensue after they enter the country. There is simply no other explanation for why the two would ally themselves with such a viciously anti-Semitic group on a diplomatic trip, or why Tlaib would request a humanitarian visit and then abruptly cancel the visit. The entire situation is simply a ruse, a way for the two to push forward their BDS agenda and stir up controversy against the Israeli government. Though the two do have free speech rights, free speech only goes far, and when a serious danger to the Israeli economy, academic institutions, and culture is at stake, the State of Israel has every right to protect itself.

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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Page 13

Science By ARTHUR LIANG

In September, Michigan became the first state to ban the sale of flavored e-cigarettes, both online and in-store. Earlier this year, San Francisco passed a ban on the distribution and sale of e-cigarettes. Massachusetts and California are also pushing similar policies. New York Governor Andrew Cuomo is likewise calling for emergency regulations to outlaw flavored e-cigarette sales. Former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, after giving $1 billion to fight against tobacco, has since revealed a new $160 million project targeted against e-cigarettes. Even the Trump administration has announced its plans to remove all flavored e-cigs and nicotine pods from the market. Vaping, the inhaling and exhaling of vapor produced by an e-cigarette, is a hot practice amongst teens. According to The New England Journal of Medicine,

Vaping: A National Epidemic

one in four 12th graders reported vaping in the 30 days prior to its survey. Immediate action against this highly addictive practice is a necessary step that gives hope to all the public health officials,

sale of e-cigarettes would kill the $2.6 billion industry and wipe out 20,000 vape shops nationwide. They also emphasize how smokers can utilize e-cigarettes to slowly quit smoking. Without e-cig-

president, insists that keeping just one or two flavors in stores defeats the whole purpose; instead, people will just gravitate toward those flavors to satiate their nicotine addiction. Wimmer plans to

Currently, we don’t know much about the effects of these chemical concoctions. All we know is that they’re linked to severe respiratory problems. And yet, an increasing number of teens are exposing themselves to them. parents, and educators who have felt powerless in keeping students away from ecigs outside of school. The appropriate extent of such bans is still being debated. The vaping industry and its supporters assert that the flow of e-cigarettes into the market is crucial. They argue that banning the

arettes, the jump to quitting would considerably lengthen, resulting in many resorting back to cigarettes. Nonetheless, the American Lung Association has criticized Governor Cuomo for not taking the opportunity to instate a blanket ban on all e-cigarettes. Harold Wimmer, the association’s

solicit New York’s state legislature to issue a broader ban, an important step in combating vaping’s prevalence in schools throughout the state. On the scientific front, the many chemicals involved in different e-cigarettes make it difficult to pinpoint a single culprit. Some patients vape T.H.C, the psychoactive

component of marijuana, while others use substances high in vitamin E acetate. To discover the true culprit, a systematic approach is being advocated to test and ban all products that have any oil at all. Currently, we don’t know much about the effects of these chemical concoctions. All we know is that they’re linked to severe respiratory problems. And yet, an increasing number of teens are exposing themselves to them. Vaping has become increasingly normalized for teenagers, and the nature of peer pressure accentuates this, increasing addiction. Addictions and habits at such a sensitive age are hard to conquer once established. Not only may teenagers grow up continuing to vape, but they may also seek “higher pleasures,” namely cigarettes and drugs, as their tolerance for e-cigarettes builds. It’s clear that vaping is a problem of national concern andso it should be treated as such.

Science, Politics, and Prestige: A New Age of International Space Exploration clearly contagious; around second for a rendezvous with and atmospheric patterns. It the world, countries like Ja- Ryugu, a carbonaceous aster- champions practical space pan and India are jumping oid thought able to fill in the exploration, looking to the The Sea of Tranquility on the space exploration gaps in our understanding stars above for hints about lies still against a backdrop bandwagon for the sake of of the interactions of water, how to improve lives on blacker than night, a color- science, politics, or just plain minerals, and organic mat- Earth below. Its philosophy less paradiseborn from vol- prestige. ter in the solar system. After has launched it to the vancanic eruptions and asteroid Sixteen years ago, the successfully firing a tantalum guard of drug discovery, strikes. Its ancient, innocent osteoporosis treatment, and surface, devoid of water, is aging research in space; furdecorated by basaltic rocks it has solidified JaAmerica’s achievement has stood thermore, of iron and titanium. It feels pan’s position as one of the frozen in time, but the date is most advanced Asian the test of time: no country has three July 20, 1969, 3:16 p.m. powers in space. Sixty seconds later, an The Indian Space Reeagle-emblazoned vehicle since sent a manned mission as far search Organization (ISRO), painted red, white, and blue squeezed by ambitious deadaway from Earth. swoops down from above, lines and ulterior political exhausted after a 240,000motives, has had a far rockier mile journey from Earth. A journey. Chandrayaan-2, a nine-rung ladder spills from Japanese Aerospace Ex- bullet into Ryugu’s surface to multi-purpose mission conits mouth, and a man clad in ploration Agency (JAXA) collect deeper, purer debris, sisting of a lunar orbiter, a white space suit makes his claimed a long list of space Hayabusa2 is ready to make lander, and rover, was India’s careful descent. exploration firsts with the its more than three-billion- long-awaited chance to boost Fifty years later, the fact 2003 debut of the spacecraft mile journey back to Earth in its international prestige that astronauts Neil Arm- Hayabusa. Despite numer- December 2020. and amplify the nationalistic strong and Buzz Aldrin ous engine malfunctions, Japan’s space exploration tide already sweeping across walked on the Moon after communication failures, and strategy is unique in a field the country by landing on successfully landing the Ea- botched landing attempts, it overrun by big promises the moon. The orbiter was gle module on its surface is became the first Earth-based and even bigger budgets. It equipped with state-of-thestill as amazing as the vast ex- vehicle to rendezvous with makes for slow but steady art technology, including a panse of space itself. Ameri- an asteroid and safely re- progress, foregoing spec- terrain mapping camera, a ca’s achievement has stood turn a sample of its rock to tacular human missions to solar X-ray monitor, and an the test of time: no country Earth. Classed as clumps of Mars or the Moon to con- infrared spectrometer, to has since sent a manned mis- rock and metal traveling too centrate on easier targets like analyze water abundance on sion as far away from Earth. quickly to coalesce into plan- asteroids, Venus, or Mercury. the surface. Launching at a But that does not mean ets, asteroids offer a glimpse that no one has tried. As into the chemical reactions, much as it is a year to debate periods of heating, and presand celebrate, 2019 is also a ence of water throughout As much as it was a year to debate year to contemplate man’s the billion-year history of future among the stars. The our solar system. and celebrate, 2019 was also a year era of government-funded, After a small step with cash-guzzling rockets like Hayabusa, JAXA was ready to contemplate man’s future the enormous Saturn V has for a giant leap with Hayagiven way to a new age of busa2 in 2014. Weighing less privatized space travel, led by than a ton, it relies on two companies like SpaceX (un- solar panels, one ion engine, der Elon Musk), Blue Origin and a xenon propellant for Even working with a budget strikingly low budget, Chan(under Jeff Bezos’ Amazon), constant, low-power thrust less than a tenth of NASA’s, drayaan-2 seemed destined and Virgin Galactic (under over long distances. In July JAXA has launched satel- to welcome India to the elite billionaire Richard Branson). 2019, it descended at a tanta- lites to gather data on Earth’s club of countries that have The adventurous mood is lizing seven centimeters per volcanic activity, water cycle, successfully landed probes By KRISTOFF MISQUITTA

on the Moon, which currently includes the United States, the Soviet Union, and China. Moreover, its landing site was plotted at 375 miles away from the Moon’s south pole, the farthest any country had ever attempted to land from the celestial body’s equator. The dreams and ambitions behind the launch were shattered when ISRO lost contact with Vikram, the Chandrayaan-2 lander, just 1.3 miles above the Moon’s surface on September 6, 2019. Its location remains uncertain, but its fate is assured: its instruments are frozen solid in the subzero temperatures of the lunar night, which lasts for 14 days. Still, the orbiter continues to circle faithfully around the Moon, relaying data about the surface and exosphere composition. In the mere half-century since Apollo 11, mankind has made unprecedented progress in space exploration, sending Curiosity to Mars and Chang’e 4 to the Moon. However, while it may seem that we are rapidly advancing, in the grand scheme, space has changed very little. The Moon remains a desolate wasteland, waiting to be colonized. Ice on Mars may well lie beneath the planet’s reddish surface, waiting to be discovered. Asteroids zoom in and out of reach, waiting to be mined for their metals. So far, space exploration has largely been a game played by just two or three countries. Perhaps a few new contenders and some healthy competition are what our spacefaring species need.


Page 14

The Spectator ● October 13, 2019

Science Reconstructing the Denisovan Anatomy

University of Jerusalem has mains unanswered. between genetically modified become the first to successThe reconstruction of and unmodified material. Before the unearthing of fully extrapolate and recon- the skeletal structure of the In this case, however, such ancient ancestral remains in struct a model of what the female to which the pinky genomic patterns among a remote Siberian cave, sci- first prehistoric relatives of finger belonged took years species in the comparative entists believed that only two study were used to find retaxonomic groups existed— gions that were methylated Neanderthals and Homo This allowed the Some modern-day Melanesians differently. sapiens. But 11 years ago in research team to distinguish 2008, two major discoveries contain Denisovan-specific nucleo- which genes result in certain were made that ultimately anatomical features based on challenged such ideas. A mohuman illnesses in which the tide sequences in their lar and a pinky finger were same genes lose their funcfound in a cave in Russian tion. The patterns helped genome. Siberia, allowing researchers them understand what feato expand upon the nowtures were distinctly Denisodefunct theory. While the humans may have looked of tireless work and multiple van, and around 56 of these molar tooth and pinky fin- like. This reconstruction is cycles of trial and error. The features played an immense ger are around 160,000 and the result of almost a decade researchers took DNA ex- role in reconstructing their 80,000 years old, respec- of puzzling over Denisovan tracted from the finger, two anatomy. tively, scientists were able facial features, yet it only Neanderthals, chimpanzees, The DNA methylation to sequence DNA from the gives a glimpse as to how one and modern humans to use technique was key in deterfossils. What they discovered such Denisovan individual in a comparative study and mining the differences bepointed to the existence of appeared. While data may be learn more about Denisovan tween Denisovans and Nean entirely new group of hu- extrapolated to better under- anatomy. The differences anderthals, but the physical mans: the Denisovans. The stand what other beings livDNA provided valuable de- ing during this time looked tails regarding Denisovans, like, researchers may need to such as their intermingling unearth new pieces of fossil The Denisovan molar and pinky and interbreeding with the for further sequencing. Just a first humans. They are now few years ago, the mere exisfinger were found in a remote known to have lived in Asia, tence of the Denisovan taxa theory proven true when it onomic group separate from Russian cave in Siberia. was found that modern-day Neanderthals was something Melanesians contain Den- unexpected. Though only isovan-specific nucleotide DNA evidence was available sequences in their genomes. from the fossils, the techno- among methylation patterns anatomical reconstruction Due to the lack of in- logical developments lead- in the DNA samples were remained to be completformation concerning what ing to the reconstruction are amplified to separate unre- ed. The Denisovan fossils Denisovan lifestyles con- extremely important. This is lated anatomical features by showed that their molars sisted of and what exactly because the work furthers a technique known as DNA were largely unlike those in separated Denisovans ana- the question of what allowed methylation mapping. Meth- Neanderthals, and that their tomically from Neanderthals humans to survive out of the ylation mapping is most jawbones protruded but had and Homo sapiens, scientists array of hominins (not to be commonly used to detect no apparent chin. The pinky have continued to explore confused with hominids) genetic differences between finger was similar to that of anatomical differences. A re- that spread through ancient sample cells, usually in dis- modern humans, indicating a search team at the Hebrew lands, a question that re- eased and healthy tissue, or common ancestor, while Ne-

anderthals had evolved distinctive fingers. Experiments on the genomic information as well as extensive remodeling of the known attributes of Denisovans were what allowed scientists to come to such conclusions. By using the data extracted from just a few Denisovan bones, a 3D sculpture of the Denisovan figure was created. However, there are still great limitations to what has been discovered regarding Denisovans. The collected evidence is not enough to determine what an entire taxonomic group may have looked like, and the reconstruction made is susceptible to massive changes if more information is ever unearthed. While the reconstruction may show what one specific individual may have looked like, the entire Denisovan category cannot be generalized as having the same characteristics as just one being. The reconstruction, however, is an important step toward accurately and completely mapping the human ancestry. The techniques used by the researchers may prove helpful to others attempting to reconstruct or picture organisms that have not presented much scientific data. One day, there may be a gallery of reconstructed ancient faces illustrating past relatives that scientists cannot reproduce today.

Dead Art

Shirley Tan / The Spectator

By KIMYA FIROOZAN

We all need a lazy Sunday...


Page 15

The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Arts and Entertainment Emma Donnelly / The Spectator

Culture

Podcasts for Dummies

By MIRANDA LEPRI

food

Cheap Ass Lunch #2: Tasty Chicken and Variety at Cuisine K

By MATTHEW WAGMAN

Directions: On Greenwich Street between Barclay and Murray. Head one block down from the bridge, turn right, and go for around two and a half blocks past Whole Foods.

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“The Truth” This podcast describes itself as “movies for your ears,” and I think that’s pretty accurate. It’s a series of one-shot stories, done with voice actors, though they have a few extended ones (“The Body Genius” is one of my favorites), each one different from and independent of the previous ones, so you can start listening anywhere. The sound design of this podcast is incredibly detailed; you can hear the sounds of traffic and muted conversations as the main character walks to work, or drinks being poured during a bar scene. It’s almost as if you closed your eyes during a movie. For anybody looking for the podcast equivalent of “Black Mirror” or “The Twilight Zone,” this is a

Serena Chan / The Spectator

Choosing a food cart is a nobrainer for most people—they know what they want, how much it will set them back, and how fast it will take for the steaming plates of meat, rice, and vegetables to come through the window. And yes, this is quite a great thing, considering how even Dunkin’ Donuts charges $5 for a small sandwich. But what about paying just $1 more for a decent raise in quality and price? Cuisine K is a standard little metal-sided cart on the block down from Whole Foods, with a bright yellow sign adorned with spidery lettering sitting atop a crowded kitchen full of all their options. The sides display their nine options for mains, with convenient photographs for those who don’t know a thing about Korean food. While the prices go up to $10 for the calbee and beef dishes, the obvious choices are the $6 ones. For an extra dollar on chicken or lamb over rice, you have the option of spicy, barbecue, or teriyaki chicken, and much better choices of accompaniments. The real standout of this cart isn’t the options or new flavors, but the bases. There are choices of standard white rice that can be cooked to a firm and hearty brown for no extra cost, glutinous and soft rice noodles, or shredded lettuce in a light carrot ginger-y dressing with a fluorescent orange hue. The only problem is that you can only choose two of these bases—a

harder decision than you’d think. Atop these filling bases sits your choice of one of three options of meat (sorry vegetarians, you’ll have to make some sort of deal to get kimchi over rice, but I’m not sure how that will turn out). The teriyaki is probably the best, with WHOLE pieces of nicely-browned chicken loosely chopped in a slightly sweet and tangy but understated sauce. The barbecue chicken is also pretty good, with a mellow yet delicious flavor and little bits of carrot interspersed in the shredded mixture. The spicy chicken is also quite good; it’s very flavorful but also reasonably spicy and a bit heavy. If you have a thicker wallet, the firm barbecue porkchop is in whole pieces like the chicken teriyaki and does a similarly great job in bringing the meat’s natural flavor forward for an extra $2. With a free soda or water for students and probably more than enough food to fill you up, this is certainly a good deal. While the vendor is a bit hard of hearing and the cart is another block over, it’s close to the benches of Asphalt Green and provides many more choices than other carts in the area.

In an age where TV and movies are more accessible than ever, podcasts are, surprisingly, spiking in popularity. Listening is in this year, especially among high schoolers, which brings up the question: what makes podcasts special? Why do people choose to listen to audio-only entertainment when they have visual options so readily available? In my opinion, podcasts have an advantage over TV and movies in the same way that books do: they allow the listener to visualize and construct the world of the story themself. Instead of being told what the characters or the setting looks like, a listener can choose for themself. But not all podcasts are like audio-only movies. Many of the most popular podcasts are more akin to investigative journalism. These types of podcasts can explore a wide range of topics, from true crime to technology, but they’re distinctly immersive. They offer something truly unique in that the listener is almost a part of a casual conversation between hosts and uncovers information at the same pace. Instead of information being presented at face value, visual or otherwise, podcasts motivate us as listeners to take an active role in the media we consume, which is all the more valuable in a world where we’re increasingly less inclined to assume everything we read is true. Entertainment that demands something more from its audience may prove to be the perfect antidote to the ubiquity of digital media in our daily lives. It’s becoming easier and easier to let hours slip away, staring at a screen. For students especially, the presentation of TV and movies as being easy to consume is really harmful. We think that we can put Netflix on while we work or quiet our thoughts by bingeing “The Office” when we’re stressed. Podcasts don’t always offer the same easy escapism as movies or television, but that’s often a good thing. If you don’t listen to podcasts already, I can’t recommend them enough. There are tons available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and online, perfect for a morning commute, and if you don’t know where to begin, here are some of my recommendations.

must-listen. “Reply All” This podcast deals mainly with technology, and it’s often investigative. The three hosts will take a topic, sometimes from listeners, sometimes from their lives, and investigate it thoroughly. They’ve done episodes on call centers in India and Foxconn, and they do segments dissecting tweets that reference Internet phenomenons. It’s engaging, funny, and not

of “The Onion,” which specifically works well as a spoof radio show. It doesn’t follow a story format, and you can start from any episode. It’s bizarre, funny, and very creative, so if you’re looking for something different, this is for you. “Flash Forward” This is a great podcast for anyone who’s interested in science. It takes something currently being debated or developed, like animal testing, and

In an age where TV and movies are more accessible than ever, podcasts are surprisingly spiking in popularity.

too serious, perfect for anybody who likes mini-mysteries and is looking for a laugh. “The Daily” This is The New York Times’ daily news podcast, and it’s perfect for anybody who wants to stay up to date on current events but doesn’t have the time to sift through a ton of articles. You can listen to this on your commute or during a free; it’s a quick and engaging way to stay informed. “Welcome to Night Vale” This podcast is probably not for everyone. It’s formatted as a radio station presenting current events on its town, Night Vale, but the goings-on are… interesting to say the least. It perfectly capitalizes on its format, making the program uniquely appealing as a podcast; it presents the odd as ordinary, kind of like a creepier, non-political version

imagines a future where animal testing is banned. It has ministory intros with voice actors, a clip of life in that future, and interviews with different experts to try to piece together what that world would look like. “Serial” There are a lot of podcasts of a similar vein (“Radiolab” is another great one), but Serial is kind of the poster child for true crime podcasts. The series went viral exploring the case against Adnan Syed, who was convicted of the murder of his girlfriend, Hae Min Lee. The series is perhaps most interesting in that it didn’t set out with a destination: the listener knew no better than those making the podcast about how it would end. If you’re looking to get into true crime podcasts, this is the perfect place to start.


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Page 16

Arts and Entertainment Thinkpiece By JAVED JOKHAI

signs of stopping as the global temperature rises 1.4 degrees Fahrenheit annually. The longterm effects of climate change include coastal flooding, heat waves, and intense precipitation. Studies from the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America theorize that if greenhouse gas emissions continue on their current trajectory, crop yields could fall 35 percent by 2100. As much as some would love to wash their hands of guilt by claiming these statistics are just caused by natural vari-

is not progressive in their opinions on climate change and climate justice. Some see the strike as too weak to make an impact and therefore a waste of time because of it being co-opted by the government. These “antistrikers” see the New York public school system allowing students to strike as long as they provide a permission slip as an act of nullifying the strike’s impact. Comparisons to the National School Walkout Against Gun Violence were often made. I can understand this frustration as I,

Matt Melucci / The Spectator

The Global Climate Strike was not simply a protest. It was, in my opinion, the greatest example of democracy I have ever had the privilege of participating in. Those who have promised to uphold this system to the best of their abilities have, for the most part, heard what was said. However, there is a difference between being heard and being listened to. It was easy to hear us. I heard the cries of distant chants and felt the ground shake ever so slightly with the heavy steps of the 315,000 climate strikers at Fulton Square before I even left Chambers Street. The difficulty is the message being listened to—our warning heeded. It only takes a louder volume to overcome an ear hard of hearing, but to overcome an ear purposely plugged requires persistence. Luckily, the activists have that in spades. The message of the six million protesters worldwide is clear: Our planet will endure, but our extinction is promised unless we change. It’s simply up to the elected officials to listen and then act. The original purpose of the Global Climate Strike was to draw politicians’ attention to the public’s demand for climate justice, though this was lost upon many, including myself, until arriving at the march. Not to mention, the original purpose of the march was muddled with the various agendas of different marchers. It was meant to be a day for the citizens of the 150 different countries that participated to tell their governments that they are, as the NYC protesters put it, “embarrassments.” Yet despite the overwhelming turnout, the response by the United Nations (U.N.) at the 2019 Climate Summit the next day was more than lackluster. It was downright shameful. Hundreds of youth activists chose to spend the Saturday at the U.N.’s New York headquarters in hopes of speaking to powerful adults who could enact the “real change” that skeptics believe protesting cannot achieve. What happened instead was hours of waiting due to poor organization and adult-led workshops intended to teach media-literacy to teenagers. Whether or not the U.N. will ever recognize the irony of this, we may never know. Nonetheless, it would not be a stretch to say that the politicians and their rudimentary seminars were condescending toward very capable teenagers. Though hard to admit, our representatives have made it abundantly clear the cries of millions fell more or less on deaf ears at a time when change is no longer a matter of preference but necessity. It is no overstatement that we are the final generation that can end climate change before the catastrophic consequences of our collective actions fall upon us. Studies from NASA, NOAA, the Japan Meteorological Agency, and the U.K.’s Met Office Hadley Centre all come to the same conclusion: the Earth has been rapidly warming in the past few decades, with no

The Global Climate Strike Refuses To Be Heard But Not Heeded

ability, the facts sing a different tune. The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change states that there’s more than a 95 percent probability that our activities over the last half century have caused this warming. Despite the overwhelming facts, change has not occurred on its own. In fact, the situation becomes more dire. President Donald J. Trump has cut funding from the Greenhouse Gas Reporting Program, as well as millions of dollars from other EPA programs. Overall, the officials we have elected into office are twiddling their thumbs as we hurdle into the bright future they promised us but in the sense that the world is on fire. In this regard, the skeptics are right. The Global Climate Strike did not have the tangible results we aimed for. However, I refuse to believe that the contrarians have an answer to the issues at hand. The arguments I heard while engaging with my peers who were not in support of the march centered around civil disobedience, patriotism, and practicality. Contrary to my original thoughts, being against the Global Climate Strike does not necessarily mean that one

too, was against the gun violence walkout because it was coopted by the D.O.E. The comparison falls flat, though, when considering who was in opposition to the protest. The gun violence walkout was intended to be a protest against poor gun legislation. Therefore, when the cause became controlled by the school system, it lost its bite. The Global Climate Strike is not between students and the school system but between the activists trying to protect the Earth and those who sit idly by as our planet is exploited. There is something powerful to be said about the largest public school district in the nation allowing their students to miss a day of education to participate in a battle worth fighting for. Henry David Thoreau, the political thinker who coined the term “civil disobedience,” despised, more than anything, political passivity. We, the morally inclined public, are obligated to resist when our representatives veer away from the path best for humanity and the Earth. If one wishes to complain, complain with us on the streets about the problem at our doorstep, as opposed to complaining about

us attempting to help solve the problem for you. Only one option can instigate change. Be that as it may, there are those anti-strikers that disagree simply by principle. These people find that the march is inherently unpatriotic, a sentiment I understand. It would be a lie to say that I was less than uncomfortable as small factions of the march began chanting maliciously about America as a whole. As someone who finds a great deal of pride in being an American despite the country’s many flaws, I can certainly understand why the Global Climate Strike can be seen as antiAmerican. In response to these sentiments, however, patriotism is not blindly following America’s administration. It is the civic duty of an American citizen to think on their own accord every day in order to improve America. We wish not to have no American government but to have a better American government. By following elected officials for no reason other than their government status does a disservice to one’s country. For those who argue about the “practicality” of the march, bear in mind that a day spent protesting is not some fun hangout with friends. The youth are often berated for pretending to be grown up but do not actually enjoy having to make the change the adults should have done by themselves. We do this not for the sake of being selfrighteous but because it simply must be done, and we can no longer trust the adults in the room to do so. We must all face the reality that, as NYC’s Global Strike Director and senior Grace Goldstein put it, “Nothing has ever been changed by sitting at home. Participation is not simply important but is the sole driving force of revolution.” President Trump may sarcastically refer to the heroes that lead the movement against mass extinction as “very happy young girl[s] looking forward to a bright and wonderful future” as much as he pleases. This movement is too powerful to acknowledge snide remarks from grown men. Wherever we are not received, we shall shake the dust off our feet as a protest against them. I believe that I speak for The Spectator when I say that the cost of negligence is too great. Admittedly, I have hidden my true feelings through bravura. I am afraid. I write this piece from a deep fear that I will leave Stuyvesant and later regret never speaking up on a day where the only thing we can do is regret. The politicians can afford to be condescending to the youth activists and be negligent of the catastrophe hovering above our heads because it will not be their future. It will be my future and it will be yours. Whether or not you are of the mindset that the Global Climate Strike was effective or not, we must all be wary of the change that is happening. My only wish is to wake up one morning and look back to see that we were capable of changing with it.

playlist

IT’S 3:00 A.M. AND I HAVE THREE TESTS TODAY By THE ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT DEPARTMENT WHEN YOU CAN’T FALL ASLEEP, THIS IS WHAT YOU LISTEN TO.

Don’t Overthink Things Andy Hull & Robert McDowell Folk Cinnamon Girl Lana Del Rey Pop Paint It, Black The Rolling Stones Rock Take What You Want Post Malone, Ozzy Osbourne, & Travis Scott Rock / Hip-hop Day 1 HONNE Alternative Pop Slow Dancing in the Dark Joji R&B High Hopes Panic! At The Disco Pop A Nervous Tic Motion of the Head to the Left Andrew Bird Folk Lovely Billie Eilish ft. Khalid Pop SUPERPOSITION Daniel Caesar ft. John Mayer R&B Mystery of Love Sufjan Stevens Indie Folk Agony Beach Fossils Chill Rock Hot Girl Bummer blackbear Hip-hop Truce Twenty One Pilots Soul Pop Don’t Dream It’s Over Crowded House Alt Rock


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Page 17

Arts and Entertainment III’rd Time’s the Charm

Music By MORRIS RASKIN The Lumineers do not pull any punches with their third album, delivering what might be their most raw and honest album yet. Split up into three parts, it tells the tragic story of frontman Wesley Schultz’s extended family that covers the lives of characters Gloria, Jimmy, and Junior Sparks. The album opens with Gloria’s story, a tale about a mother whose alcoholism and depression lead her down a path of darkness from which she can never recover. The second and third portions follow Jimmy (Gloria’s son) and his son Junior as they navigate the complicated relationship between an addict father and his struggling son. While the album was released through three mini-EPs, the album itself is incredibly consistent in terms of tone, lyrical content, and overall sound. Using only a few acoustic instruments, the band sifts through seemingly limitless possibilities of musical combinations, and each song has its own unique spin on their traditional, folk sound. Piano-heavy songs like “Donna” and “April”

Film By GAVIN MCGINLEY “It Chapter 2” is a hard sequel to make. Whether it’s the cosmic, trippy, and highly R-rated conclusion of the original novel by Stephen King, or the goofy giant spider person taking center stage in the second half of the 1990 miniseries, there’s a clear trend that while the first part of “It” may be memorable and iconic, the second part almost always ends up being confusing and convoluted. I hoped that, with such a great first installment, this newer version of “It” (2017) would be able to break this pattern. Sadly, it does not. While “It 2” is by no means a bad movie, it fails in almost every way to live up to its excellent predecessor, as well as being unable to really work as horror. The sequel starts off 27 years after the first film, with our group of protagonists, the self-proclaimed “Losers Club,” returning to their hometown of Derry, Maine. Now adults, the Losers have all moved on with their lives and have forgotten the events of the first chapter of their story because of Derry’s strange mystical properties. The only exception to this is Mike, played by Isaiah Mustafa, who has stayed in Derry and investigated Pennywise for his entire adult life. When children start disappearing again, Mike reassembles the Losers Club to fight and kill Pennywise one final time. The movie undoubtedly starts strong. The reunion of these long lost friends is a genuinely touching moment, largely due to the excellent cast. Much like the first “It,” which was able to carefully walk the line between horror movie and teen summer comedy with its well written and likable characters, “It 2”’s ensemble features talented actors, brilliantly casted to be almost indistinguishable from their younger versions (who are still present in the form

are contemplative and slow, while songs like “Gloria” and “It Wasn’t Easy to be Happy for You” use fast-paced acoustic guitars to drive the album forward. This contrast helps to further portray the ups and downs in the life of the family with regards to their drug problems, marital issues, death, and more. The album is a refreshing diversion from most new music today, straying far from the skidding high hats, thumping bass, and high-energy hip-hop and pop music of late. Sticking to their roots is what got The Lumineers this far, and they don’t appear to be giving that up anytime soon. While the Lumineers shine with this formula for the most part, at times it can become a bit too predictable and boring. When this happens, the Lumineers use their lyricism to keep things fresh. Fresh is a good word to describe this album because at its core, it’s different from the rest of the band’s other projects, or at least more different than usual. When compared to The Lumineers’ previous efforts, “III” is both very similar and strikingly unique. Unlike their self-titled

album and “Cleopatra,” “III” doesn’t really have any singles that will get stuck in your head for weeks. While the melodies are still good, this album is more focused on heavy-hitting storytelling than creating catchy tunes. The vocals of the band also sound rawer than usual on the album, which can be a good or bad thing, depending on your tastes. While it sounds more emotional and intimate at times, the lead vocals are occasionally flat, which can take you out of the listening experience. For the most part, however, all the band members play their parts well. Lyric and story-wise, this album is nearly unparalleled by anything I’ve ever heard. The lyrics are depressing, heavy, and thought-provoking while maintaining an enjoyable rhyme and flow that relate to the storyline in an interesting way. In the first song of the album, The Lumineers sing “you couldn’t sober up to hold a baby.” The band croons lines like these throughout the album, adding weight and depth to the already deeply saddening narrative. As the story progresses, the connections

between the characters deepen and the situation they are in becomes more real. Each character in the album is trying to escape their fate in one way or another, but the ways they go about it are what fleshes out the characters’ morals and motives. Gloria runs away from her family when trouble hits and abandons her son when times get hard. Jimmy escapes his reality through drugs, alcohol, and sex, and when it all catches up to him, there ends up being no way out. There is a flicker of hope in Jimmy’s son Junior, who ends up leaving the family at the end of the narrative, forging his own path for the future. Will he escape the cycle of drugs and abuse, or will he fall back in line? One of the things that adds to the richness of the story the most are the visuals. For this project, each song on the album has a unique video that tells the interconnected story. This over 45-minute long “film” details the lives of the three protagonists and gives us an even deeper insight into the lyrics and the overarching storyline of the album. The Lumineers made the most of their small budget, produc-

ing a film that is skillfully made and packed with symbolism and hidden messages that lurk just beneath the surface. Standout videos like “Donna,” “Jimmy Sparks,” and “Leader of the Landslide” capture your attention and wrench your heart without any big special effects or editing tricks. The interactions between the characters in the videos are enough to keep you engaged and on the edge of your seat throughout the production. Overall, the Lumineers have crafted a body of work that is powerful, vulnerable, and raw. “III” differs in many ways from the previous works of the band while still staying true to their folk roots. “III” is far from a perfect album, but it is the quintessential Lumineers and is as close as we will probably get to their truest forms as artists. It feels like this was the album they’ve been waiting to make, and now that they’ve made it, it’ll be interesting to see where they go next. Overall Score: 7.75/10 Best Songs: “Donna,” “Jimmy Sparks,” “My Cell”

The Failure of “It Chapter 2” of a large number of flashbacks). Two standouts are Bill Hader, as Richie, and James Ransone, as Eddie, with this duo providing most of the much-needed comic relief throughout the film’s 169minute runtime. Of course, Bill Skarsgård also returns as the iconic Pennywise, maintaining his terrifyingness despite being underutilized in far less-effective special effects. However, once one looks past the charm of the protagonists and the first scene, it seems as though “It 2” doesn’t really have much more to offer. After the first few scenes where all of our characters reunite, the movie quickly devolves into a long sequence of not-veryscary horror scenes. The film is quick to come up with a reason to separate the Losers Club, breaking apart the group to make room for scenes meant to scare. However, in doing this, the movie loses many chances for the character interactions that form most of its more memorable and enjoyable parts. This is only made worse by the fact that the pacing skids to a halt in the second act. At almost three hours, “It 2” seems bloated and quickly starts to feel repetitive, as the script tries to shoehorn as many “horror” scenes as possible before its action movie finale. Most of the horror scenes in Chapter 2 play out exactly the same. A character is alone and Pennywise attacks, only for them to escape completely unhurt and generally

unaffected. The entire core of this film consists of an hour of what feels like the same set piece played on loop, making the whole movie feel stretched out, as well as really boring at times. Despite this, “It 2” does have some good ideas. Its frequent use of the characters’ experiences as children to shape their fears in adulthood, whether it be Bill’s guilt over his brother’s death in “It” part one or Beverly still coping with her abusive father, is clever and connects halves of the “It” saga in both theme and substance. This kind of writing is well done, and truly makes the

Daniel Berlinsky / The Spectator

characters feel real, despite being sadly overshadowed by the film’s many structural issues. Finally, we come to the most egregious failure of “It 2”: it just isn’t very scary. This isn’t to say that the more a horror movie scares you the better it is, but when half of a film exists exclusively to terrify, one would hope that it could deliver to some measure. There are many factors that contribute to this lack of horror. It certainly doesn’t help the film that “It” insists on using CGI and weird monsters in most scenes instead of Bill Skarsgård’s infinitely more horrifying clown. But many other reasons are beyond the filmmakers’ control. It’s not their fault that the main characters are now adults instead of children; that’s just how “It” was written. Still, it’s a lot less frightening to see Pennywise trying to trick fully grown men and women. Not only did the physical size difference between Skarsgård and the younger actors make him more intimidating,

but the adult Losers Club also seems far too competent at outwitting the clown for audiences to ever really fear for them. It’s also not the filmmakers’ fault that most audiences have already seen so much of Pennywise to the point where the repetitive nature of the scares in this movie definitely makes him feel more trivial. The film makes Pennywise feel more like a nuisance to the characters as they travel around Derry doing whatever menial chore the plot has cooked up. The audience is left wondering: “Well he couldn’t kill them before; why would he be able to now?” Compared to the first movie, where Pennywise seemed like a real and ever-looming threat who could snatch any of the protagonists at any time, “It Chapter 2” paints the clown as more of a monster to be slain. Without the mystery or fear, all that’s left in Pennywise is a villain with vague weakness and seemingly infinite cosmic powers who can’t kill a small group of very normal heroes because they can outrun him when he shows up to eat them. Even in the spirit of action movies, Pennywise turns into a massive computer-generated monstrosity for the final confrontation. There is a running joke throughout the film that Bill Denbrough, one of the Losers and the protagonist of this story, is a writer unable to write a good ending, likely in reference to Stephen King’s own poorly done endings in many of his own books, including “It.” While “It Chapter 2” manages to avoid the dreamlike and confusing endings common in King’s novels, it still falls flat, especially when compared to its outstanding previous installment. Despite a talented cast and great character writing, we end up with a shockingly average movie that fails by any metrics of the horror genre.


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Page 18

Arts and Entertainment Film

By JACQUELINE THOM In a long string of space movies, “Ad Astra” is by far the most underwhelming. It’s the second movie starring Brad Pitt this year, just three months since the release of “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood” (2019). Pitt is Roy McBride, a rigid astronaut who presents like a soldier and sets out on a personal vendetta to find his father Clifford McBride (Tommy Lee Jones). The junior McBride lives under the shadow of his deceased father, who is deemed a hero for his advances in space travel, but Roy seems neither prideful nor angered by this. It’s a trait that he seems to carry with him throughout the movie. There are only a few sparse moments when McBride truly expresses himself and even when he does, you’re left questioning the truth of the few screams that McBride allows himself to emit. It’s clear that director James Gray wrote the entirety of this film with Pitt in mind. The two have been friends for two decades and wanted a better role for Pitt where he was no longer the gel-haired, good-looking, talkative, sometimes gum-chewing, often gun-wielding type. And it’s true that Pitt is better off when he’s brooding. His legacy has far preceded him, always giving onlookers the impression that Pitt is a man of mythical ability even though he’s been starring in fewer movies and prefers to keep to himself. That’s exactly why I’m not immediately denouncing this movie as disappointing. The film has its faults, whether it be in its obsession with lens flares and Pitt’s dusty blue eyes, or its startling failure to reference “2001: A Space Odyssey” (1968) but there’s a lot to be commended. “Ad Astra” focuses on McBride’s stoicism and his refusal to become attached for fear of losing his head. Roy McBride represents logic and serves as a vessel for viewers’ own dissatisfaction with the trivialities of human emotion. At one point, McBride’s military superior quips, “Is it true that your heart rate has never gone above 80?” McBride smoothly replies, “Not yet, sir.” It’s this coolness, this habitual refusal to quaver, even later in times

Ad Astra: A Philosophical Space Sleeper Hit

of near-death, that is so enticing. How could a man of McBride’s status, so marked with achievement, remain so detached? Even when he is alert, McBride is distant. His resting heart rate is 47, and in all his psychological examinations, he reports with a near monotone on his readiness for work, how he slept, how he feels. All of it seems like some dream where the colors are vivid and echoing music interrupts the oblivion of space.

matter how steadfast in his refusal Roy is. Unfortunately, it ends too soon, with our protagonist abruptly returning to his reserved ways once he decides to set out to retrieve his father. In this world so far removed from the confines of Earth, where traveling to Mars is trivial, and Saturn even less so, we are alone. Much like Stanley Kubrick’s last work of art, “2001: A Space Odyssey,” “Ad Astra” asks us to confront what it means to

trality, but the answer he finds is that it is impossible to remain unseeing when someone dies, to be calm when you are left to fend for yourself, to refuse oneself the innate need for human connection. It is because of these questions that makes Gray successful in creating a big-budget film that trades the typical action-packed sequences for an examination of emotions and relationships. Despite this, some bits of the film are odd when given further

McBride has gone so far into the depths of loneliness and dissatisfaction to reach perfect neutrality, but the answer he finds is that it is impossible to remain unseeing when someone dies, to be calm when you are left to fend for yourself, to refuse oneself the innate need for human connection.

In bits and pieces, we find out that McBride has distanced himself from his wife in an effort to perform better at his job as an astronaut. McBride’s father is hailed as a hero, but Roy loathes him for his cruelty in leaving mother and son behind to do exactly what Roy does himself: remove himself from all emotional attachments in the pursuit of the advancement of humanity. When Roy finds out the truth—that his father killed his crew members to prevent them from cutting a fruitless mission short—the younger McBride finally breaks from his neutrality. He quickly falls into what could be called disrepair for someone as machine-like as he is. In the vivid reds and greens that characterize the film, McBride collapses into himself. Somehow he is angry for not believing the cruelty he saw in his father. What he learns is also a long-coming confirmation that father and son are indeed of the same ilk, no

be human. Who are we without emotion and connection? How far can we go before enough is enough? Does trying to advance the human race justify hurting those closest to us? At first, these questions aren’t obvious, and neither are their answers. Gray instead lets the action manifest through the inner turmoil of his character. In the few moments when McBride loses his stability and acts close to maniacal while on the journey to find his father, viewers are confronted with images of a person in extreme pain. McBride talks to himself, his eyes flicker every which way in anguish, he floats corpse-like in the wide maw of his spacecraft, contemplating how he’s gotten to this point. The juxtaposition of such images makes this seem like some terrible reaction of the brain to a neglectful owner. McBride has gone so far into the depths of loneliness and dissatisfaction to reach perfect neu-

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consideration. Without Gray’s philosophical ruminations and Pitt’s excellence in being mysterious, it’s questionable whether “Ad Astra” would be anything more than a visually-pleasing look at the possibilities of space travel. Gray unrealistically warps the laws of gravity to his liking. Religion is referenced twice in the film though it doesn’t play a larger role. McBride is so sturdy in his coolness that when he does break into sweating and babbling, it’s hard to believe it’s more than a dream sequence that lasts way too short. The movie feels long but by the time it ends, it’s not long enough. It’s surprising how well Gray brings his ideas onto the screen, though. He and cinematographer Hoyte van Hoytema [Dunkirk (2017), Interstellar (2014), Her (2014)] utilize a series of primary colors, close-ups of Pitt, and spiraling shots of space to convey McBride’s unsaid contemplations

and his realizations of life. Narration is present, much more at the beginning of the film than the end, and the sparingness of it eases viewers into the life of Roy McBride, who is best summarized by his half-order, halfplea, “Please don’t touch me.” Like with many movies that try to be new and experimental, this is one that requires thought beyond just a simple watch. Unlike other sci-fi space films like “Gravity” (2013) and “Interstellar,” there’s less action and more observation involved. It’s not exactly something that can work for everyone, which might explain the movie’s limited release—it’ll be in New York City theaters for less than a month, and two people keep alternately snoring during the movie. It’s hard to describe what it feels like watching this film. It doesn’t qualify as either bad or good, and sometimes seems mediocre, other times eye-opening. What little action there is in the movie is muted, being almost unimportant when McBride brushes off another person’s death and escapes unscathed. Throughout, you can’t help but hear the sound of your own breathing as you wait, thinking but for what? It might just be wishful thinking that Gray has a reason for making this piece as quiet and composed as it is. The centerpiece is Nils Frahm’s “Says,” which acts as McBride’s theme, a quiet series of synthetic beats and disconnected piano that evolves into a roaring echo that surrounds the senses. At the same time that this is a cruising, meditative piece, there is an element of nuanced storytelling involved that brings to mind the connections between father and child. It’s not an obvious theme, but maybe viewers are okay with just another Brad Pitt film that’s meant to give us a look into the actor’s personality. “Ad Astra” is not at all satisfying when watching it, but becomes more so with time and contemplation. Revel in its blaring colors and attention to detail, because that’s the most excitement you’re going to get besides the camera’s infatuation with Pitt’s face.


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Page 19

Humor These articles are works of fiction. All quotes are libel and slander. By AARON WANG and KELLY YIP With the end of September, a majority of Stuyvesant students have resorted back to their abnormal, screwed-up sleeping habits. Sleep deprivation is spreading faster than the use of metal straws, and its effects have been much more prevalent. Students left and right have been passing out on their desks, on the benches, and are sprawled across the ground in the hallways. An urgent staff meeting was held last Friday in which many teachers described their agitation with the sleep-deprivation epidemic plaguing the school. Coffee is often viewed as the go-to remedy for sleepdeprivation, and an average Stuyvesant student’s blood already consists of 92 percent coffee. Caffeine is detrimental to the fragile, developing bodies of adolescents, especially since they’re already unhealthy as is. Thankfully, to solve this problem, Principal Eric Contreras has come up with an

The Revolutionary “Sleep Talk” Program ingenious solution by partnering up with the Student Union to introduce a new program: Sleep Talk! This revolutionary program employs volunteers of all levels, from amateurs to professionally-trained counselors, to motivate students to persevere through even the most monotonous of classes. Sleep Talk workers will follow students throughout the day to provide assistance. Experiences will certainly differ depending on the tier of the program that you apply for. For a standard-tier package, a Sleep Talk volunteer, a student who is likely to be just as sleep-deprived as you, will attend your classes during their free periods to provide assistance. Just as you begin nodding off to sleep, they’ll give you a slap on the back of your head before the teacher or anyone else notices. However, more often than not, they’ll probably fall asleep before you do, and you’ll have to wake them up to remind them

to wake you up. After all, they’re also an ARISTA tutor, a Writing Center editor, and a community service volunteer, and could really care less about you. All they really need are those service hours to go on that juicy college resumé. A premium-tier package provides a better experience and a professional Sleep Talk counselor at a mere cost of $10 per period. Instead of a harsh slap on the back of your head, which is probably detrimental to the few brain cells you have left, you are able to request gentle head rubs or soothing caresses that will gingerly bring you back into the reality of your history class. For an additional $5, Sleep Talkers will whisper phrases of encouragement such as “don’t let those sleep paralysis demons bomb your already helpless average, honey” and “if you don’t wake up, you’ll bring dishonor to your family, and your reputation in this classroom will be forever tarnished.” This package ensures that if you do doze off acci-

dentally, you can always count on someone to wake you up and leave you even more refreshed than before. The last package available is the deluxe-tier package, which provides the ultimate, revolutionary Sleep Talk experience. You will be provided with a professional Sleep Talk coach who will follow you through every period of your school day and provide after-school training sessions for the mere cost of $2000 a month! Sleep Talk coaches will use a variety of mental exercises to mentally abus— er, strengthen—students so that they’ll no longer feel tired during the school day. However, in the off chance that you do fall asleep, your coach will be there to screech in your ear and tell you to “drop and give them 20.” Not only will you be awake, but you’ll also be super healthy! The adrenaline rush and embarrassment you get will fuel you through the rest of mathematics class without faltering one bit. In addition, to ensure that you

remain vigilant throughout your classes, coaches will abruptly throw pens, pencils, textbooks, or chairs at random intervals. This promptly wakes the student as they are forced to react… if not, the pain will wake them up all the same. It’s a win-win! The deluxe-tier package trains their clients to effectively harness their sixth sense to stay awake during class and become a better Naruto Runner as an added bonus. The Spectator fully endorses the innovative Sleep Talk program, and we encourage all students to take advantage of this wonderful offer. It is well worth its cheap cost and will be a valuable asset to your performance at Stuyvesant. On the other hand, if you seek to make a better Stuyvesant experience for your fellow peers, we highly recommend that you apply to Sleep Talk. It’s an amazing experience that you and your peers (and your college apps) will benefit from!

Inspirational - These Four Stuyvesant Teachers Owe Their Lives to Cereal Mascots By OLIVER STEWART As the old adage goes, all Stuyvesant teachers have two things in common—they teach at Stuyvesant, and they have undergone a near-death experience from which they were rescued at the last minute by the advertising mascot for a popular breakfast cereal. We asked several teachers to tell their stories. Vincent Miller, Physical Education teacher Mr. Miller is a well-known figure at Stuyvesant, having taught physical education for many years as well as coached some of Stuyvesant’s most successful sports teams. What many students may not know about him, however, is that as a young man he was saved from being hit by a car by popular cereal mascot triplets Snap, Crackle, and Pop. “I was crossing the street,” he said, stroking his chin as he recalled the moment. “And suddenly a car came around the corner out of nowhere toward me. I was frozen. Luckily, Snap,

Crackle, and Pop were there to save me. They managed to stop the car in its tracks with their superhuman Krispie powers.” Mr. Miller went on to describe the three brothers as “really great, cool guys,” saying that they even gave the driver a stern talking-to about safe driving afterward. Lisa Greenwald, Social Studies teacher Before Dr. Greenwald decided to pursue a career in history, she played semi-professional lacrosse in Hartford, Connecticut. As center defensive end for the Hartford Hailstorm, she battled valiantly for the tri-state championship. One game, however, her heroic defending almost ended badly for the regional MVP, as an opponent’s misdirected shot ricocheted off the goalpost and back at Dr. Greenwald’s head. “I don’t know what would have happened if it wasn’t for Cap’n Crunch. I don’t want to think about the possibilities,” she chuckles slightly, shaking her head. Ironically, contrary to his popular slogan, it seems

the Cap’n actually saved Dr. Greenwald from being CrunchA-Tized. “He caught the ball one-handedly about four inches before it hit me. An amazing feat of physical prowess from a guy who’s most famous for selling sugar-laden grain products.” As well as being a veritable superathlete, Cap’n Crunch is apparently also a great conversationalist. “We still meet up sometimes for coffee,” Dr. Greenwald said. “Did you know that he’s making a limited-edition Halloween cereal?” Debbie Goldberg, Mathematics teacher Ms. Goldberg’s encounter with fate and grains actually occurred on her first day of teaching at Stuyvesant. Originally, that first day was going to be spent teaching health. Going in, she said, “I was a little self-conscious that I’d be the only teacher who had never been rescued by a cereal promotional character.” Her anxiety over this fact was undue, however. As she exited the Chambers Street ACE station, a

loose piling from a nearby scaffold came thundering down. At that point, Ms. Goldberg said, “My life was flashing before my eyes. I thought it was curtains for sure.” Just before the metal beam dealt the final blow, however, Larry the Quaker from the Quaker Oats box managed to intervene, bundling Ms. Goldberg out of harm’s way. “I don’t remember anything after that super clearly,” she said. “But one thing I do remember is him saying something like, ‘Prithee, tell me what discipline thou intends to teach at Stuyvesant High School.’ When I told him health, he seemed disappointed, and he convinced me to become a math teacher instead. I’m so glad he did. Otherwise, I never would have discovered my passion for differentiation.” I’m sure Ms. Goldberg’s students will agree that her sudden career change was good for them, too. David Hanna, Social Studies teacher The summer after he graduated from college, Mr. Hanna

and a couple of friends decided to take a sailing trip down the east coast of the United States, starting in Bangor, Maine, and ending in Miami. Around Cape Cod, their trip hit a snag. “We felt a jolt,” Mr. Hanna recalled, “and we knew something serious had happened. I rushed below decks, and I could immediately tell that we were taking on dangerous amounts of water.” They signalled for help and started to bail, but the boat was sinking lower and lower in the water. “Just as we were getting desperate, Sam the Toucan appeared on the horizon. You know, Sam? From Froot Loops? One by one, he lifted us off the boat with his beak and flew us to shore, several miles away,” he said. The encounter had two main consequences: one, it left Mr. Hanna with a lasting respect for Froot Loops, and two, Sam the Toucan became the first coast guard toucan in the continental United States.

The Climate Strike Calamity By VERONIKA KOWALSKI Thousands of students from across the globe joined forces on Friday, September 20, in a valiant attempt to #savetheworld. This march was organized by Swedish climate activist Greta Thunberg (16), as a global school strike. Thunberg had to travel to the United Nations from Sweden in order to deliver her speech. She opted to

come to New York via a zeroemission yacht rather than by plane, which required a 15-day journey. At the strike, protesters donned posters with crafty slogans such as “There Is No Planet B” and “We’re missing our lessons so we can teach you one.” In preparation, senior Grace Goldstein relayed the event to her posse at Stuyvesant High School. “Let’s storm City Hall, they can’t stop all of us,” her

Facebook post read. More than half of the school marked itself as “going.” Two hundred students walked out of the building at 11 a.m., the start of fifth period. Each one of them wholeheartedly believed in the cause. Junior Oliver Stewart spoke to The Spectator on the day of the strike. “I made such a sacrifice to be here today,” he said. “Trust me, I would much rather have sat through my seventh-

period physics lecture. But instead, I showed up here today, for the greater good of mankind.” The Spectator also met up with protesters at Wok Wok over a bowl of pho at noon. “Wait, my absence is excused, right?” senior Tim Chen asked, slurping his fried rice in chicken broth. “I’m so glad this thing is happening on a school day.” At the end of the day, police and janitorial staff were

stuck picking up hundreds of posters littered on the ground, which attests to who the real heroes of the day were. Additionally, members of the staff who manned Thunberg’s fancy boat flew themselves back to their homeland, effectively leaving her stranded. “I don’t know how I’m going to get back,” the activist admitted. If only we all had our own personal zerocarbon yachts, so we could take after her virtuous example.


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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Humor By HELENA WILLIAMS

Stuyvesant Capital Plan, 2019-2029 Current Debt: $50,000 (due to another robotics lab renovation) How To Obtain Funding: • Start selling coffee in Stuyvesant for $10 directly after the swipe machines, and offer extra espresso shots for $5 apiece. Expected to earn ~$100,000 per day, $80,000 of which will come from the junior and first-term senior student body. • Stop providing the Humor department with bribe money. Seriously, they’ve burned up $100,000 of our budget by now, but it was worth it to get “The Five Dollar Album,” a fantastic work of art that can be found on SoundCloud at https:// soundcloud.com/humor-102597642/?. Expected to earn $10,000 per published issue of The Spectator. • Bring back K.F.T. Though, at first, it’ll cost at least $50,000,000 for that piece of Tribeca real estate, the profits will be “yuge.” The freshmen haven’t even been indoctrinated yet and probably don’t know what K.F.T. stands for (since the nonStuy ones are but phony replicas!). Honestly, the profit from this will be infinite. Initiatives: 1. Robotics Lab Renovation, Again, Because They’re Soooooooo Special and Wonderful Everyone knows about how we’re upgrading the robotics lab right now. What they don’t know is that the next stage of the plan is to demolish all classrooms on the third floor located beneath the robotics lab and build a second wing of the lab, devoted entirely to programming, because the poor robotics children no longer have a space to do their software engineering in. After all, the original room they were working in was completely demolished by an unfortunate robotics lab renova-

tion, when the engineering lab next door was extended into their area. What a hardship for these bright-minded students. The new wing will have its own staircase and elevator just for getting to the fourth-floor section of the robotics lab, and all of the best computers in the school will immediately be relocated to this area. 2. Printing For Everyone The current emergency print station situation is intolerable. And while the News department made it public that we intend to put a second station on the seventh floor, we’re actually expanding this project to have a print station on every floor. Paper costs and redundancies be damned, we’ve got to ensure that there’s never any line for printing. So, we’ve decided to demolish the current teacher offices on each floor and replace them with printing lounges where students can go to print their giant projects. Each printing lounge will feature seven computers (two running Windows 10, two running MacOS, two running Linux, and one on Windows 95 because the first initiative used up all of our good computers), comfortable couches, and more overpriced vending machines. We’ll also be building an elevator shaft just for this area, along with a *fancy* spiral escalator! As for the teachers, they’ll be handled in the next step. 3. Floor Expansion and Staircase Improvements Look, hasn’t it ever ticked you off that the floors get smaller the further up you go in Stuyvesant? Like, if they’d built them all in the same size as the first floor, we’d have enough room to build literally anything. So let’s do that. First, all staircases will be extended to the 10th floor (including the gym staircase, the most lonely and unused staircase at Stuyvesant), which will allow students to spend even more time sweating and grumbling in incredibly packed staircases. Once the actual expansion is done, however, we’ll be building the new teacher offices in the extra floor space. However, that still leaves a lot of room, so we’ll be putting in several new spaces. These include: A lake on floors six to seven, with a simulated current and several different biome spaces. This is primarily for the biology department and the Stuy Coral Reef club but also for the stuy.edu homepage, since the photo of the pool isn’t clouty enough. A second auditorium on the eighth floor exclusively for those sexy new chorus risers. Can you believe it? There’s no giant, inexplicable bulge on the second level of steps, and the back rail won’t fall out when you fall asleep on top of it! Whether it can house the 150+ members of the Women’s Choir all at once remains to be seen. Another extension of the robotics lab on the fifth floor, because now the marketing

department feels left out! How will they write their awards essays without an entire new lab? Woe is them, their old space was demolished by a robotics lab renovation. 4. Escalator Replacement Look, the escalator system has gotten really bad, so we thought up a solution. All of the down escalators will be torn out and replaced with slides. Students will place their backpacks in a slide off to the side (think Costco shopping cart escalators) and then go down the main one. Instead of spending ~20 seconds to go down the escalators, it’ll only take two seconds! The up escalators will be replaced by rope ladders, which will enable Stuy students to build upper body strength as they wrestle with a 20-pound backpack, and we’ll add in an eight-to-10 escalator—sorry, ladder-slide area—during this procedure. 5. New Floors Stuyvesant doesn’t have enough space to teach as many awesome subjects as it could teach. We need to add another 10 floors, in order to a) flex on Brooklyn Tech’s massive building that houses the apartment of one of their old principals, b) accommodate several new departments, and c) incorporate some of the other things we’ve had in mind. Here’s the official floor roster: 11th Floor: Aquatic Athletics department - Literal 11th-floor pool. ‘Nuff said, ya won’t be able to joke about it for much longer. 12th Floor: Computer Science department - Since the CS department is currently stuck between three floors, just consolidate them into one floor with all kinds of cool, high-tech CS gear. Literally just throw all the money at this floor and see what sticks. Sure, their stuff won’t be as cool as the robotics kids’ stuff, but hey! It’ll make do! 13th Floor: Botany department - Just make it a greenhouse and be done with it. 14th Floor: Earth Science department - It’s absolutely ridiculous that we don’t have an earth science department! What, the biology department teaches AP Environmental Science? That’s unacceptable. This and Regents Earth Science will be the only two classes taught on this floor. What do you mean Earth Science is useless in Stuy? 15th-19th Floors: See step eight. 20th Floor: Astronomy department - Two words: big telescope. A massive one. It might not be at all useful because of the skyscrapers surrounding Stuyvesant, but it’ll make the school look cooler. The addition of a rocket launchpad should also boost enrollment in Akhmedov’s Astronomy class, because he’ll actually be able to take students to space every semester. And hey, the astrology department could probably set up shop here too!

Katherine Lwin / The Spectator

Hello, Spectator readers! We of the Humor department have some wonderful news. Through our advanced eavesdropping tactics such as holding a glass against the Student Union door and listening on the other end, we’ve managed to get information that even the News department couldn’t obtain: a concrete list of the planned renovations coming to Stuyvesant in the next 10 years! What is attached below is copied directly from a handout that we obtained by shouting “THEY LET SPIDERMAN BACK IN THE M.C.U.” and using the ensuing confusion to steal a copy.

Stuyvesant Capital Program, 2019-2029

6. Subway Link Everyone keeps on claiming that the subways are delaying them. However, instead of pushing the school start time back, or something equally sensible, we’ve done some serious collusion with the MTA by selling some upgraded escalator tech, and the Chambers Street station has been included in the MTA’s expansion plans! We’ve demolished city regulations and plumbing systems alike in order to set this up, and when the station is complete, students should have access to all of the trains in Manhattan. That’s right, we’ve extended the 7 train even further downtown along with the L train, made all of the orange lines duck over to the West Side for only one stop (because they can’t get slower than they already are), and even extended the Q train yet again! We’re hoping it’ll take fewer than 100 years this time. 7. StuyPassport The ID cards are getting old. They’re crappy, plastic, easy to lose, and the pictures on them don’t immortalize the ugliness of the freshmen as well as they could, because they’re so low-quality, tiny, and hopeful. So instead, we’ll be issuing the new StuyPassports! Without a StuyPassport, you can’t enter Stuyvesant unless you are touring Stuyvesant or have a StuyVisa or a StuyGreenCard. In order to obtain any of these, you’ll have to go through a complex and laborious semi-legal process involving forms I-310 through I-694, interviews with several random SU officials, and a system that makes the threecard monte look like a paragon of fairness and justice. The differences between them will be in extremely fine print at the bottom of some of those hundreds of forms, and encoded with a pigpen cypher. They will serve as valid identification throughout Stuyvesant. And, of course, they will have an ugly freshman photo on the front in full color and high quality, tinted either a glaring white or an equally glaring yellow.

8.The Robotics Lab Again, Yes Seriously, Because Who Cares Anymore Once we’ve fended off the mobs of angry parents without their proper identification, we’re also going to expand the robotics lab onto the second floor, just to ensure that those jank robots can have enough space. After all, the robotics team is more important than literally any other club or pub at Stuyvesant. So, the entire second floor will be covered in the strange green-gray material they call “the practice carpet.” Feeling the Pulse yet? 9. Dormitories For Students Do students even need to have lives outside of Stuyvesant? Nope! By moving all Stuy students into floors 15-19, we can almost entirely eliminate contact with the distracting, non-sleep-deprived world beyond the Tribeca Bridge. Alas, until the botany department can successfully grow enough food for 4,000+ people in a single greenhouse, the food resources of the normies will be required. Still, every other aspect of Stuyvesant life will take place within 345 Chambers Street. 10. Building A Wall Finally, in order to secure academic excellence, Stuyvesant will declare independence from the state of New York and become a city-state. In order to pass the checkpoints (located at the Tribeca Bridge and the subway station and the former CAASS scanners), prospective students must score high enough on the SHSCSAT (Stuyvesant High School City-State Admissions Test), a test that definitely isn’t a blatant copy of the SHSAT. This will ensure that our students never have to interact with the normies outside. There won’t be any time for such frivolous pursuits as “TikTok,” which we believe is burning up valuable procrastination time and isn’t all that funny in the first place. 11. The Finale At some point, we’ll just demolish all of the stuff we’ve just sunk money into and replace them all with more robotics lab space. Why not?


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Page 21

Humor By JONATHAN XU A senior recently contacted The Spectator about how he ended up passing out fruit in the cafeteria for all 10 periods of the day. On the third day of school, he received student contracts for his parents to sign from every single one of his classes: AP Calculus ABC, AP Music Lunch, AP Dean’s Lunch, AP Drafting, AP Juulry Design, AP Shoestring Theory, AP Underwater Basket Weaving, and AP Regeneron. All of these were due the next day. So, after going home and spending an entire night finishing his college apps and waking up and spending his entire commute finishing even more college apps, how many contracts

Contract Killer or the Killer Contract?

did our beloved senior end up getting signed? Zero. Nada. Zilch. He walked all the way up to the 11th-floor pool, sat in his favorite spot in his AP Underwater Basket Weaving class, taught by the infamous Michael Phelps, and almost drowned when his jaw hit the floor upon realizing he hadn’t gotten any of his contracts signed! He whipped out his favorite click pen and tried forging his mom’s signature, but the ink kept leaking into the water and irritating his neighbors’ noses to the point of making them sneeze. Ah… ah… achoo! He knew this wasn’t going to work, so he asked to use the bathroom. He snuck his folder into his swim trunks, made it there in record time, and was barely

The Land of the Free By RUOXIN CAI The year-that-must-notbe-named; the shame of every senior; the year whose artifacts are permanently engraved on the cards of identification we carry: Freshman year. No one wants to think about it. Especially not me, a sophomore. (Seniors and juniors, look! I’m one of you now! You can stop bullying me now!) Especially since we’re almost as cool as the upperclassmen. Sure, we do SING! with the freshmen, but we all know that us sophomores carry it. And besides, sophomores are practically upperclassmen (10 is in the double digits; therefore, we are upperclassmen). Let’s make a sophomore SING! petition. If it were up to me, I’d use the reality stone to erase all existence of my freshman year. Thanos, the lucky little brat, has never had to go through such a mortifying period of history. You all know how it was: the horrors of being awkward with your teachers, never knowing if you’re acting too cool or too much like a nerd. The fear of joining clubs and talking to people who could help you because obviously you think, I can do it all on my own! (spoiler: you can’t). The painfully heavy backpacks coupled with the 10-story school bring you into

a new and unexplored world: a new pit of hell to enjoy. The agony of having to look up and bitterly reminisce about how, back in your eighth grade days, you could look down upon all the sixth graders. The miseries were endless. But as a sophomore, that’s all behind me! I can be both cool and a good student! I don’t have to grasp for self-deprecating jokes every half-minute in a conversation to prove that I have fully integrated into Stuyvesant. I can look down my nose at anyone shorter than me! I can claim to be an upperclassman and watch as the freshies’ eyes grow wide with awe (actually that’s a lie; I haven’t actually talked to any freshmen, but I’m sure that they would be impressed with my long list of achievements during my long stay at Stuy, which include being in The Spectator and not much else, tbh)! I can claim superiority and a greater workload than any freshie out there. And even better, my mind has been freed of the insidious urge to wear my gym outfit 24/7. I have been enlightened about the benefits of other articles of clothing such as jeans and T-shirts that (shockingly!) aren’t the Stuyvesant gym shirts. As a sophomore, Dobby is a free elf from the chains of freshman year!

able to dodge a cloud of noxious JUUL smoke. Whew! After successfully completing all of his contracts, he went back to class, and life went back to normal until the very next day, when his AP Dean’s Lunch teacher, Ms. Josina Dunkel, pulled him into the hallway and told him to go to Mr. Brian Moran’s office. The door was open, but the lights were off, and there was not a single speck of light to be found. He sat in a nearby chair, and a spotlight suddenly blinded him! He could make out Moran’s silhouette as it slid a paper toward him. “We got a pretty big alumni donation this year, so instead of fixing the escalators, we sank a couple million dollars into the Sham Scram 9000.” He fed the

paper through a slot, and the machine’s lights lit up like the eyes of a freshman hunter who had just seen a lost freshie. “Cool,” the senior said. “Does it work for academic dishonesty?” “No.” “Awesome! That means… er… fuhgedaboutit!” Moran raised an eyebrow before taking the paper back, sitting down, leaning in, and Tposing to show his dominance. “You, sir, have forged your mom’s signature. Do you see this section over here?” He pointed to a line of white text in 8-point Comic Sans that read: “Forging a parent’s signature will result in having to spend 10 periods a day, every day, passing out fruit in the cafeteria for the

rest of your life.” And so it came to be that our senior became a cafeteria worker, without any pay, free lunch, workers’ compensation, or even waivers for his SAT IIs. When asked about it, he said he hated it. “My first day, I tried reminding this big footballplayer-type dude that he needed an apple. He sucker-punched me so hard that I got a black eye with a color that somehow looked more appealing than any of the fruit I was offering. Don’t forge your parents’ signatures, kid.” I’m going to take that advice to heart. But first, I need to forge my mom’s signature on a couple of checks with a lot of zeros.

THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE.

By CHRISABELLA JAVIER

In one of the many glass cubes located around Stuyvesant’s walls, there was one specific thing that, at first, wouldn’t really stand out. It was located on the bleachers of the pool and contained a simple wooden cube with writing that said, “THE CUBE.” Last weekend, it was broken by one of the custodians trying to clean it. By the time Monday came around, a couple of confused freshmen came to the pool to find the custodian bowing down and saying, “THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE.” Whether it was the memetic power of THE CUBE or just the natural response of the tiny little freshmen, they began to follow the custodian’s chant. When the bell rang for second period, they fought over who would get to keep THE CUBE. The winner of the fight was the one junior in the freshman swim class—Helena Williams. She was elated that she would be able to spread the word of THE CUBE. But as she entered the crowded hallways, she found herself mobbed by her peers, now captivated by THE CUBE. The rest of the week, students were infatuated with the idea of THE CUBE. People were willing to die for THE CUBE. People were willing to kill for THE CUBE. Not even the threats of teachers saying they would fail their students if they didn’t bring

THE CUBE to them could stop people from claiming THE CUBE for themselves. And so THE CUBE WARS began. There was mass destruction throughout Stuy, nearly spilling out into Battery Park City. At one point, the Student Union claimed THE CUBE and used its power to create an army to enforce its rule, but the army was quickly entranced by THE CUBE and turned against their leaders. One of the many science and technology groups in Stuy made a nuclear bomb to destroy anyone who tried to take THE CUBE from them, but we, the righteous and honorable Humor department, stopped them by beating them up until they stopped moving. We then searched their bags for THE CUBE, and I got my hands on it for just a minute. It was beautiful. It was amazing. My mind was instantly filled by the endless possibilities of THE CUBE. I could change the world with THE CUBE. Nothing could stop me if I had THE CUBE. Then, my editor Olly Stewart tried to take it from me. Olly, if you’re reading this, “forget” you. None of us knew where THE CUBE came from, but rumors spread about its origins. Some said it formed from the hopes and dreams of Stuy students. Some said it was something stolen from Moran’s secret stash. And others said it was created by a secret Stuyvesant cabal of magic, made

to harness an ancient and powerful energy. The war was finally broken up sometime on Friday by none other than Eric Contreras himself, rumored CUBE creator and arguably the only person who could handle THE CUBE’S power without instantly being corrupted. He was able to contain it in its original position, but shortly after, a bunch of shadowy figures entered the school. It seemed that the rumor of THE CUBE’S power had escaped Stuy. The mysterious figures proceeded to round up the rest of the school. They are going to wipe everyone’s memory of THE CUBE. They will erase THE CUBE from the world’s consciousness. They will burn THE CUBE. They will destroy THE CUBE. They are looking for THE CUBE right now. But I found it first. I’m going to break the glass. I’m going to save THE CUBE. I can see it now. The glass is broken. THE CUBE is beautiful. THE CUBE is power. THE CUBE is endless. THE CUBE is perfection. I can save THE CUBE. They’re here now. I need to save THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUBE. THE CUB—————— Huh. That’s weird. When did I write this article?

Crackdown on Swapped Lockers to Crack Students’ Backs By VERONIKA KOWALSKI Several Stuyvesant students have had their lockers taken from them. Here at the Humor department, we strive our best to debunk myths and present to you the facts. So here’s what actually happened with the Great Locker Crackdown. It’s no surprise that teachers know that all the hanky-panky that goes on, from the corruption in the Student Union, to the best paper-sharing techniques of desperate test-takers, can be found on Facebook. So if my AP Underwater Basket Weaving teacher sees “Stuy Basket Weavers” under “sug-

gested groups,” you bet he’s going to join in on the fun. (But we all know it was some bitter freshman who ratted us all out. You didn’t hear that from me, though.) Let’s ignore the fact that “Buying & Selling Lockers @ Stuy” has existed ever since juniors have been begging for more AP classes. Let’s not take into account that this system has never caused any problems before, administrative or otherwise. Let’s also sidestep our knowledge of seniors’ lack of assigned P.E. storage. Some administrators took it upon themselves to open up a schoolwide game of Whack-a-Mole. Just let that sink in for a mo-

ment. Fast-forward to when an unsuspecting junior tried to open her locker, but unbeknownst to her, Dean Frederick Mussorgsky had cunningly replaced the padlock with an identical one in order to catch her in the act. Instead of having the convenient access to a locker near her Spanish classroom, the junior was now late to Spanish, because she couldn’t access her textbook! The deans had won. The junior’s devious ploy to make life easier for herself had been foiled. She had no choice but to approach Assistant Principal of Security, Health, and P.E. Brian Moran, effectively turning herself in for her hei-

nous crimes. In return, she had her lunch privileges indefinitely revoked, was sentenced to 40 hours of library service, and suffered a fate worse than cafeteria food: Freshman Backpack Syndrome. Freshman Backpack Syndrome (FBS) is a malady that typically affects humans of the first-year high school student status, and can typically bleed into the first few months of the second year, until the individual acquires proper lockerusing technique. Students were unable to plan the location of their storage room ahead of time. Some were assigned to an obscure area by the 11th-floor pool, and so they used their

independence and self-sufficiency, cultivated by none other than Peter Stuyvesant himself, to accommodate themselves. Apparently, these attributes are only encouraged tongue-incheek here at Stuyvesant. Under the new locker-swapper-hating regime, students who are unable to leap tall buildings in a single bound are forced to carry pungent gym uniforms (including smelly sneakers), hefty language manuals, math notebooks, dissected pig carcasses, severed toes, and that draft that was supposed to be reviewed at the Writing Center. And to all the freshmen out there: I’m sorry. Your FBS is now chronic.


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The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Humor Dear My VSCO-haters... By LIAM KRONMAN and ERICA SUGIMURA

By JAKE LIN and IVAN WANG Whoever decided to make teenagers go through show and tell every single day under the pretense that it helps refresh their memory must’ve been high. If you’ve been to kindergarten, you would know the PTSD that follows a stressful day of showing people things. Minutes gifts are always either a hit or miss, both of which are very awkward. With each teacher in the English department having different standards for minutes, it’s always a breath of fresh toxic gas air every year to see what you’ll have to go through from then on. Of course, each student has his or her own style of presenting, from the awkward silences to the five-minutes-before-class creations; the world of minutes is vast. Today, in order to help you along your journey, we bring you our top five minutes ideas. The Five Minutes Before Class This is a classic and simple gift for the typical attentive class, a surefire way to make them go to sleep. All you have to do is Wikipedia something about your book. Now you can say, “Did you know that Holden Caulfield’s middle name is Morrisey? Now you know!” With that, you can be sure that you have given your classmates very

ni” by Nas and “Ransom” by A Boogie, I decided to throw away all my PINK sweatshirts and sweatpants. I changed my Insta from private to public and set my business label to “Just for Fun” ‘cause I’m just for fun. I took a little bit (only $8000) out of my Vanguard trust fund and Uber Blacked to Urban Outfitters to buy some XL black T-shirts with yellow smiley faces on them and a few other shirts with these big, red Kylie Jenner-looking (omg, I love her) lips and tongues sticking out. I’ve been thinking about getting more because I’m really not sure if they’ll look cute with my biker shorts, even though the shirts are, like, so long that people will probably think I don’t even have pants on. I am so upset. My Amazon Prime only let me get three pink hydroflasksksksksks, two environmentally-sustainable baby blue Kanken b a ck p a ck s,

Cadence Li / The Spectator

14 shell necklaces and anklets, and 50 shades of scrunchies. I barely even have hair, but I still like to keep a couple on each arm as jewelry. I have to replace my Lokai bracelets, friendship bracelets, and Silly Bandz with the scrunchies, and I’m still not sure if I have enough to cover both of my forearms completely. I even had to steal seven pairs of my father’s Birkenstocks. Ug(gs)h, they don’t even have that, like, really, really beachy smell. Now I’m really upset, like Drake upset. But do you know what’s even more terrible? Fricking plastic straws. That’s right, every day 40,000 species of turtles go extinct every half an hour just because of, like, dumb, uncultured spinachturds throwing away their plastic straws, not knowing that the cute turtles mistake it for, like, food and eat it. Ugh, we really need to save the turtles. Cuz of this, whenever my personal chef makes me boba, I always make sure to bring two big metal straws: one for sipping and one for Snapchat. I need to let my friends know I’m environmentally friendly like that. But right now, I really feel like there is, like, a really terrible stigma toward us VSCO people. Just because we only write in calligraphy with Mildliner highlighters and won’t stop saying “anna oop, anna oop, anna oop, anna oop, anna oop,

Minutes Ideas to Try at Home

important information they really needed to know. Armed with your gift, your classmates will finally be able to understand the complexity of “The Catcher in the Rye”! An alternative of the Five Minutes Before Class is the famous “eye-opening” (figuratively and literally) and popular stick figure art. Avant-garde art depicts a new side of you and can further explain the sublimity of the books that you are reading. An avant-garde picture of a dog can explain what goes on in the mind of Christopher from “The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time”! Though this book is short, your Five Minutes Before Class can clearly depict this story in a picture. (Don’t try this!) The last alternative is the famous poetry for the class. This type of gift may include haikus. This is usually an amazing gift as it gives the class some extra literature you pulled off the Internet to enjoy! To utilize this strategy, simply Google “Hubris Poem” and now you have a free minutes gift for “Julius Caesar” and half of the other books you read.

The Artist This gift is a classic, for both artistic and lazy students. With this style of minutes, you have two options: you can either actually put in effort and create something that looks good so it can go in the teacher’s personal

art gallery, or you can just bullfeces it and create something lazy. From our (my) personal experience—when I used two

The Food Plug Honestly, I am still not sure if the people giving out the food actually make it. People

Whoever decided to make teenagers go through show and tell every single day under the pretense that it helps refresh their memory must’ve been high. hours to create some *koff koff* art—I highly recommend this minutes idea. Either way, the class still has to clap as your work gets passed around and eventually collected by the teacher for them to look at for a few seconds before they get on with their class. Definitely go with this route if you’re a good artist (or not, it doesn’t really matter). Something everybody must enjoy is the “I am a very bad drawer” excuse as they proceed to present us with the best avant-two-second-drawingstickman-garde drawings. We fully support all artists no matter the skill as we (I) have committed these sins.

often just show up with cookies or cake with no tie whatsoever to the book, and everyone’s happier. It’s free food and an easy minutes gift, provided you aren’t the one making the food. Minutes that were supposed to take under three minutes suddenly take five. However, as much as I think food gifts are very unfair to those who do not know how to cook or have a Cooking Mama, I fully approve of it. The sugar helps people like us (me) survive the rest of the day, and we (I) will always look forward to the extra sugar. If you decide to use this method, always make sure it has no nuts (and that a parent is home).

Emily Chen / The Spectator

Hi, my name is Bellamy (my friends call me Liz or Lizzy for short), and I am a VSCO girl. “What’s VSCO?” you ask. It is just the best app everrr!!! I use it to lay out all my pictures in this aesthetic theme using filters and editing tools. I think my favorite filters are B3 and G6 cuz they make me look like I have sun-kissed skin. Let me take you through my process. Honestly, it’s so simple. It takes me only an hour to get my desired picture. It never changes because I have this, like, lavish, dreamy periwinkle theme that apparently Ariana Grande has too. I bet she viewed my Insta feed and had the inspo to steal it. Anyway, the first step is to find the perfect picture. This takes up most of the editing time because I take about 100 to 150 pictures, and I have to scroll through all of them on my iPhone 11 Pro. My daddy pre-ordered it for me, but when I opened the box, it was this ugly red color. I don’t even understand why he didn’t get me the purple one, because then it would literally match my periwinkle theme. I yelled at him, “Why red??!!!!” and he had, like, the audacity to give me some BS answer about wanting to help fight AIDS or something as if, like, contributing to AIDS is more important than my phone color. Also, did he not realize that there’s an iPhone 11 Pro Max?! He literally makes 10 figures, and he wasn’t willing to pay just $399

more. Whatever, tho, because my daddy apologized and said he would get it for me. When I don’t take pictures with my iPhone 11 (ew), I take all my pictures with the Fujifilm Instax Mini 8 film cameras that I got for my birthday. I barely have, like, all of the Fuji film cameras. Haha, but, like, I don’t even think I’m that rich though, lol. Anyway, you need to check out my VSCO feed. The link is in my Insta bio, obviously. Don’t forget to follow me there, too. But, like, don’t expect a follow back because I really gotta break past my 1000:1 followers to following ratio, sorry, but I post these super inspirational pastel-colored Tumblr quotes and sunset pics! Anyway, this past June, I finally turned 13, but I was forced into spending all of summer break at my four-story beach house in the Hamptons. Ugh. This summer was still a little special, though: my parents took off parental restrictions on my App Store. I could finally switch from Musical.ly to TikTok. No more lip-syncing to songs that I’d have to stop singing along to when a bad word came on and all my friends calling me a cat. Joining TikTok was almost like my second bat mitzvah. After just one week of filming myself hitting the woah to “Pani-

anna oop, anna oop, anna oop” doesn’t mean we’re any lower than anyone else. In fact, it’s just our lifestyle. Haters can keep hating, but they’re my motivators. Like, I’m sorry you can’t afford to buy a $70 thermos and an $80 backpack that you can’t even fit folders in— not to mention if you lose your bag, it’s hard to find because half the school owns one. It’s honestly not even expensive! Instead of going out for lunch at Whole Foods and spending $35, stay indoors for just two days, and you’ll have your money to twin with me! I love who I am, and even though I might not have enough checkered Vans slip-ons, clumpy mascara, spray-painted penny boards, fairy lights over my headboard, mini trampolines, and Mario Badescu Facial Spray, it doesn’t mean that I’m not someone of substance.

The Book Plug “I read this in fifth grade and so should you!” —Ryan Wang (permission was received without using violence) The Essay (with an awkward silence) Hey, sisters! This afternoon, I’m here to give yesterday afternoon’s minutes that recaps what went on during yesterday afternoon’s class. The day before today, we had a discussion about what we had read the night before until we discussed again with our partners about the same section of the book. We then had a short read-aloud where we read the passage that we had just discussed very slowly as we cycled through every student in the class… (the rest of the minutes is on repeat). And this rambles on for a whole five minutes. This really helps you remember what happened the day before, as you probably completely forgot about everything after you slept. Do you disagree with our picks or think we left anything out of our top five list? If so, please DM us on Messenger with your feedback! If you like our list, make sure you like and subscr—I mean, tell that to our editors! *We’re so sorry about this article. Please don’t lower our grades, English department :)?


The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

Page 23

Sports Boys’ Cross Country

A Solid Start for the Greyducks

By PRESLEY HERNANDEZ The Stuyvesant boys’ cross country team, the Greyducks, had its first meet at the Xavier Invitational on September 22. The athletes were split into three divisions: freshman, sophomore, and varsity. Expectations were high for all three packs, and the freshmen were super excited to compete in their first high school meet. Unfortunately, the freshman team was ineligible to score because it only had four people instead of the required five. However, they did gain valuable experience, exemplified by how senior and co-captain Wentao Lin said: “They experienced the pain

from running the hills.” The sophomore team had the highest expectations, as it sent two varsity runners to the meet. “Not only did they meet expectations, they crushed it,” Lin said. The highest performing sophomores placed first, seventh, and 27th in the 2.5mile run. Sophomore Atticus Bacon, who took home the gold, is one of the top runners for the Greyducks. “He was our top runner last year, as well as this year,” Lin said. He proved he is the Greyducks’ best runner, finishing first place with a time of 13:51.10, 50 seconds faster than the runner who placed second. He by far performed the best for the Greyducks at the Xavier

Invitational. Sophomore Lucas Lee, another top runner from last season, also put together a strong performance, finishing seventh in the race with a time of 15:04.10. Both sophomores outperformed the varsity team, and the sophomore team as a whole placed fifth in their race. Speaking of the varsity team, it still has room to improve. The top three finishers for the varsity team were Lin, who finished 18th (15:23.0), senior Alex Li, who finished 34th (15:58.1), and senior Jackson Zou, who finished 37th (16:00.0). Compared to the sophomore team, the varsity team fell short of expectations, after having dealt with setbacks. Many seniors were injured, and

Coach Carl Disarno didn’t expect most of varsity to be at 100 percent due to the intense workouts they had had during the week. Even though the Greyducks didn’t do particularly well at their first meet, it’s only the beginning of the season, and they still have a long way to go. The next big meet for the Greyducks will be Mayor’s Cup, where everyone who is active on the PSAL roster will be running. The varsity team lineup has not been finalized, as it’s still being determined based on how each runner did at the first meet and will be finalized by the Mayor’s Cup. The Greyducks’ performance at their first meet has

not deterred them from having high hopes for the upcoming meet. Some boys have set high expectations for themselves, including Lin, who aims to break 15 minutes in the 4000-meter race. The ultimate goal for the Greyducks this season will be to qualify for States, which requires the team to finish top four at “City’s.” “It’s hard, but I’d say it’s doable for us,” Lin said. The Greyducks’ top five varsity runners will need to run sub-18 minutes in the 5000-meter race in order to have a likely chance of qualifying for States. However, they have confidence and high hopes in themselves, which is very important in making this goal possible.

Fantasy Football

Has Your Fantasy Football Team Left You Fulfilled or Frustrated? Depends on Your Picks continued from page 24 number one fantasy wide receiver is a no-name player being thrown passes by a no-name quarterback. That being said, it is the D.J. Chark show in Jacksonville as he has emerged as Minshew’s favorite target. Though regression is probable, he is still a terrific WR2 play in many formats. T.J. Hockenson; Tight end, Lions; As Matthew Stafford continues to turn back the clock and perform at an elite level, he has raised the play of those around him. Hockenson saw many targets week one, and he may become a buy-low candidate right now given his recent recession,

meaning you can get him for a cheap price. The Lions are going to use their first round pick like the star he is, much to the delight of many fantasy owners. Frank Gore; Running back, Bills; One of the most underrated running backs of all time, 36-year-old Gore is still showing us what he can do. Now that Gore has been given the starting running back position, his ceiling has increased immensely. Frank Gore continuously puts his talent on display as shown by his number of yards he gets per touch, proving he is a truly effective player. Talent + Opportunity = Fantasy gold. Add this player,

now. While there are many players who have seen their stock rise, there are also many players who should be traded for more value at other positions: Joe Mixon; Running back, Bengals; It’s not entirely his fault for underperforming, as he doesn’t get the ball very often and runs behind a crappy offensive line. However, it’s looking more and more likely that he will not perform up to standards this year. If you have Mixon, find a trade partner while you can. Devonta Freeman; Running Back, Falcons; The fact of the matter is that fantasy football is a

numbers game, and Freeman has not put up the necessary numbers a fantasy owner needs out of a running back. There are no signs for improvement, only the possibility of losing more touches to his backup running backs. Stefon Diggs; Wide receiver, Vikings; Diggs is a great talent; nobody can deny that, but he has not been given the opportunity to succeed in the new-look run based Vikings offense. He’s coming off a great week four, so look to sell high. Damien Williams; Running Back, Chiefs; After the emergence of several other Kansas city running backs, Damien Wil-

liams may see a demotion in the depth chart. As of right now, he is still the starter, so you may be able to trade him for a solid player, but in the next few weeks, we may be speaking of Williams as a possible bust-of-the-year candidate. As the football season continues, the emotional fantasy roller coaster will get even crazier as owners will be left scratching their heads and jumping for joy just minutes later. Get ready for another year of extraordinary fun and potential weekend-ruining days. Good luck to all, and may the best (or luckiest) player win.

Athlete Of The Issue

Can’t Touche Dis Fencer—An Interview with Tazman Libson By AKI YAMAGUCHI

Tazman Libson Height: 6’1” Eye color: Brown Hair color: Dark Blond Birthday: 3/13/2002 1. When did you start fencing? I started fencing 10 years ago. I went to a fencing summer camp and kept with it. 2. What are your goals for this season? I think we can win playoffs this year. It’s going to be a lot of work, but I believe we have it in us.

do more conditioning (myself included). It’s hard to balance both fencing and conditioning. 5. Do you fence outside of school? Definitely. I compete semioften in solo tournaments. I actually have two tournaments this weekend. During the week, I’ll miss one practice to go to a fencing club up on 28th Street. During the off-season, I’ll fence two to three times a week. I’m hoping to get that number up to four to five this year.

4. Any challenges the team faces? Not enough fencing time. Unfortunately the dance studio can only have three strips, so not everyone can get enough fencing time. We also need to

7. How do you deal with schoolwork and fencing; any tips? I try to get as much work as possible done at school. Otherwise it just cuts into my sleep schedule.

9. Proudest memory so far? Regarding the team, it has to be just a couple of weeks ago [when] two other members placed top six—Micheal Russo in fourth and Alex Lin in sixth. They both came into the team with no fencing experience. To see how far they’ve come in such a short time was great [...]. Favorite food: Omelettes, preferably with hot sauce. Favorite drink: Sparkling water. I drink about one to three liters a day. Motto to live by: There’s always more optimization to be done. Fun fact: I’m actually from Northern California. I moved here in 2014.

Matt Melucci / The Spectator

3. Is there anything you want to work on for your own skills? Yes, for me it’s endurance. By the end of a three-hour tournament, I get really tired.

6. What is your respective position and what does that entail? I’m a co-captain with Alex Lin. I generally lead each practice through our conditioning, footwork, drills, and fencing. I also give private lessons to members of the team.

8. Favorite or funniest memory? Not one particular memory but one of my favorite things in fencing is foot touches. Getting that perfectly timed touch, there’s really nothing quite like it.


Page 24

The Spectator ● October 16, 2019

THE SPECTATOR SPORTS CALENDAR

New York Giants

The Duke of New York

By KRISH GUPTA

Commissioner Roger Goodell stepped onto the stage to the usual boos, but the crowd went silent and inhaled sharply as he began to read from the envelope that would transform a troubled franchise’s luck: “With the sixth pick in the 2019 NFL draft, the New York Giants select…Daniel Jones, quarterback—Duke University.” The Giants fans in attendance were shocked, with hands on their heads. The Giants’ watch party in Metlife stadium erupted into boos. Ohio State’s star quarterback Dwayne Haskins was still on the board, as were quality defenders like linebacker Josh Allen. Yet the Giants selected a quarterback no one had going so early on their draft boards. But a few months later during the preseason, Jones won the hearts of Giants fans with his unexpected maturity and versatility in the quarterback position. Going into the regular season, there were already shouts from fans to start Jones immediately, but Coach Pat Shurmur said the team would stick with veteran Eli Manning to kick off the season. After a sound loss to the Dallas Cowboys in Week One, the Giants continued to underwhelm the Big Blue faithful in a Week Two matchup against the Buffalo Bills. A play that summed up the game: Manning backed out of the pocket, launching a last-ditch effort at a touchdown downfield. The pigskin sailed 10 yards past the nearest Giants receiver, and a Bills defender dived to make the simplest interception of his life as the clock wound down. Eli flashed his signature expressionless shrug, ignorant to the fact that the throw may have been the last of his 16year career. That Week Two matchup dropped the Giants to 0-2, a seemingly lost season, putting pressure on the front office and players alike.

Two days later, the Giants announced that Jones would start Week Three against the Buccaneers, quickly ushering in a new era for the Giants. Manning provided words of support for Jones, and the football world eagerly awaited the debut of the Duke product. That Sunday, Jones didn’t disappoint in his debut, leading a rousing Giants comeback in Tampa to top the home team 32-31, giving the Giants their first win of the season. “Danny Dimes” proved worthy of his nickname, forming an electric connection with tight end Evan Engram and wideout Sterling Shepard and throwing them a touchdown each, including a 75-yard catch-and-run to Engram for his first NFL passing score. His presence clearly energized the team, and the receivers were all eager to catch passes from the rookie. Jones kept his cool and looked comfortable and mature in a hostile environment, while Mike Evans and crew kept the pressure on the other side of the ball, killing the Giants’ secondary. Jones showed his athleticism as well, rushing for two scores, including the tying seven-yard touchdown on fourth down leading to an Aldrick Rosas game-winning extra point. Saquon Barkley left the game with an injury after an ineffective rushing game of just 10 yards on eight carries, and the Giants were down by as much as 18 points, but Jones carried his team back into the game. It sounded like a home game for the Giants with the house shaking after another missed field goal by the Buccaneers’ kicker Matt Gay and the clock striking 0:00, sealing the win for Big Blue. Many analysts peg Jones as a Manning clone—produced by the same coach—but they forget about one crucial aspect of Jones’s game: his legs. In key moments, Jones showed his dual-threat capability, rushing

for a total of 28 yards on four carries with two touchdowns, a modern mobile quarterback that Giants fans haven’t seen ever. As Giants fans move on to a new era under Jones, it’s important to look back on Manning’s long career. His legacy will forever be cemented as the clutch Tom Brady-slayer, beating the GOAT not once, but twice in the Super Bowl, including once to deny the Patriots of a perfect season. Two of his throws led to the greatest catches of all time, by David Tyree and Odell Beckham Jr. And lastly, possibly most importantly, he won the hearts of fans of the league through everything from his Dunkin’ Donuts commercials to his Walter Payton Man of the Year awards to his famous gamewinning drives. Today, many view Manning as a washed-up veteran. Yet, there are few better suited than him to lead the Giants to a last-minute drive in the Super Bowl. Now, as he gracefully passes the torch to Jones, never forget the lasting contributions Manning made to the Giants franchise and the league. With Manning now mentoring the young quarterback and calling plays on the sideline, if Jones were to turn out even half as successful as Eli, the future is bright. Going into Week Four against a weak Redskins team, the Giants are supercharged with optimism for not only this season but also the seasons to come with Jones under center. The hype is real; two New Yorkers are even trying to trademark the “Danny Dimes” nickname. Jones showed his brilliance, and Manning will likely soon retire a Hall of Fame career knowing his franchise is in great hands. Giants fans are loving it—jersey sales for Jones are up 500 percent. All of a sudden, it is great to be a Giants fan, all because of one kid from a predominantly basketball school: Danny Dimes.

October

19

11:00 AM

19

Boys’ Varsity Football Stuyvesant Peglegs at Alfred E. Smith Alfred E. Smith HS Field

21

10:00 AM Girls’ Varsity Soccer Stuyvesant Mimbas at Nest+M Forest Hills HS Field

4:00 PM

Boys Varsity Soccer Stuyvesant Pegelgs at Beacon High School Randall’s Island Field 70

WRAPUP Stuyvesant Sports •

Jessica Kwok, Agatha Edwards, Susan Zheng, Ester Suleymanov, Liza Reizis, Nour Kastoun, and Caroline Ji placed second overall in the varsity race at the PSAL Group Run on September 28. Freshman Bella Stenhouse placed first in the freshman race. Stuyvesant boys’ varsity soccer team clinches a playoff berth.

Professional Sports • • •

Zion Williamson impresses in NBA pre-season, averaging 23.7 points per game and a 71 percent field goal percentage. Patriots and 49ers remain the only undefeated teams in the NFL. Isreal Adesanya unifies the UFC Middleweight Championship Belt with a knockout win over Robert Whittaker.

Fantasy Football

Has Your Fantasy Football Team Left You Fulfilled or Frustrated? Depends on Your Picks By BENJAMIN HAMEL Only about a month ago, everyone in the entire fantasy football world was reading their last articles about potential sleepers and busts before their upcoming drafts. A lot has changed since then in both the NFL landscape and the fantasy football scene; experts have landed some bold predictions but whiffed on most of them. As the first few weeks of the regular season come to a close, there are many issues to talk about that will have a huge impact on the rest of the season.

For starters, many so-called breakout stars and high-end talents have been busts thus far. Juju Smith-Schuster, who was predicted by many to be a top three fantasy wide receiver, is currently sitting outside the top 30. That doesn’t even come close to the disappointment that Deandre Hopkins and Davante Adams fantasy owners are experiencing, as they likely spent mid-first round picks on these underwhelming elite talents. The receiver position always sees a degree of inconsistency, but this year is far worse than past ones.

To make matters worse, the injury plague has started to affect various stars as well, driving fantasy owners as well as head coaches nuts. The consensus number one fantasy draft pick, Saquon Barkley, is out for two months with a broken ankle, and the highest scoring wide receiver from a season ago, Tyreek Hill, is out for about another six weeks with a right arm injury. After talking about all the negatives, there are, as always, positives to make of them. Now that Hill is out, Chiefs receivers Mecole Hardman and Demarcus Robinson have made a name

for themselves, performing at an above average WR2 level. In any league—in any format—these two players are must adds and can propel your great, or crappy, fantasy team to glory. Other must add players in your leagues include: Marquise Brown; Wide receiver, Ravens; After having a monster week one to propel him to fantasy relevance, Brown seemed to level out in the next two weeks. That being said, he has maintained a consistent target share on deep passes that led to big plays and touchdowns— both ideal fantasy plays.

Darren Waller; Tight end, Raiders; As Derek Carr has limited options in Oakland, he seems to have found his new favorite target in Waller. Coming off of a 13 reception week, Waller has put up top five tight end numbers, all without any touchdowns! When Waller starts to find the end zone, we may be talking about him as a legit top three tight end and a must-start every week regardless of matchups. D.J. Chark; Wide Receiver, Jaguars; Believe it or not, the continued on page 23


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