Four Challenges to Buying a House When You’re on the Spectrum

Even as a published author, I still hadn’t achieved what my brothers had

BY RON SANDISON

Autism has made life a challenge for me. Only 3% of people with autism are gainfully employed, 85% of autistic individuals with a college degree are either unemployed or underemployed, and our average life expectancy is 54 years old.

Every milestone in life took me longer than my brothers and peers. I graduated from high school at 20, was 35 years old before I had a long-term relationship, 36 when I moved out of my parents’ home, 37 when I got married, and 41 when I became a father and my first book was published. I just purchased my first home at age 49.

Reaching my goals, like buying a house and publishing books, required two things: a great support team and self-efficacy. My support team consists of my wife, parents, and older brothers Steve and Chuck. They help me make wise decisions and take healthy risks. Self-efficacy has empowered me to have the confidence to accomplish my goals.

I bought my first home in November of 2024 and paid twothirds of the price in cash, making the mortgage low. My dad had a protestant work ethic: “If a man will not work, he shall not eat”

(2 Thess. 3:10). I learned life skills through employment and my dad taught me to save money to purchase a house. At age 12, I had my first job cutting our acre lawn with a push mower. I had my first job outside the house at age 14 bussing tables at a Bill Knapp’s restaurant.

Employment from an early age helped me gain skills like budgeting and saving money, dealing with angry customers, and making friends with coworkers. My dad had 3 money rules: First, 10% goes to God or charity, the next 10% goes to my saving account, and the final 80% I could spend on what I want. There was twist on the 80%. If I desired a pair of expensive jeans like Levi’s or stylish shoes like Air Jordans, I had to first go to Kmart and write down the price of the off-brand jeans or go to Payless and write down the price of a comparable brand of shoes. After I wrote down the prices, I’d subtract the price of the brand name item from the off-brand. My dad would then give me the amount for the off-brand and say, “You could have saved money if you would’ve bought the Kmart brand of jeans or the Payless shoes.”

This encouraged me to save money by buying off-band items, or buying clothes when they are out of season or on sale. The lessons I learned from my dad and my support team empowered me to overcome the challenges of buying a home.

For me to buy a house I had to save for thirty years and have gainful employment. My early employment in restaurants and telemarketing prepared me for my career in the mental health field and as a national author and speaker.

As Anita Lesko, a nurse anesthetist and author who is on the autism spectrum, shared: The job market is highly competitive for everyone, even neurotypicals. For those on the autism spectrum, it’s far more difficult. But it’s up to parents to get your kids out there doing various jobs at an early age. Start them at home doing chores…Having autism and working a career-type job is like going to a foreign country, not speaking their language, and trying to survive. To this day, all these years later, I still feel like a foreigner in a strange land. Yet I’ve built enough experience and “learned the language” enough to have a successful career. I know without a doubt in my mind that I would never have made it as an anesthetist if I hadn’t had all my previous jobs.

Without employment, savings, and living within your financial means, you will have difficulty affording a house in this market. For a $240,000 house, the property taxes are about $3,000 and you will spend about $2,500 to $3,000 on annual home repairs and maintenance.

The second challenge of home buying is the hidden costs. These include a home inspection, closing costs, down payment, and if the house is in a homeowners association (HOA), monthly HOA fees. We on the spectrum often fail to consider the hidden costs. The average down payment on a house varies depending on a number of factors, including the type of loan, the state of the housing market, and the home’s price. In 2023, the average down payment for a first time homeowner was 8%. Our home inspection was $400 and closing costs about $6,000 dollars. We pay an HOA fee of $378 a month.

Your support team can help you consider the amount you will need to save to buy a house and the value of the house you’re planning to purchase. When buying a home make a list of the different costs.

The third challenge is your credit score. The higher your credit score the lower the interest rate on your mortgage. You’ll typically need a credit score of 620 to finance a home purchase. I had never had a credit card so I had zero credit history but plenty of money in the bank. We overcame this challenge by purchasing the home in my wife’s name--her credit score was almost 800. You’ll need to get a credit card to establish a credit history; make sure each month to pay off your balance so you don’t incur interest and debt. The average credit card interest rate in America is 24.43% so use your credit card with discretion.

My final challenge was navigating the hidden rules of buying a house — this requires a professional, experienced, and honest real estate agent who will act as your advocate. In November of 2023, I almost purchased a home with major foundation issues. The real estate agent had used a friend of his to do the inspection, and told me there were no disclosures. Five minutes after I dropped off the $5,000 earnest money, he texted me stating there was a disclosure--the home had foundation issues. [i] His dishonesty cost me $500. I immediately called the seller’s agent and got my earnest money back.

My support team helped me get an honest real estate agent to represent me. She helped me research and hire a reliable home inspector, confirmed there were no disclosures, and negotiated a lower purchase price. You can find a good agent by asking friends, family members, or coworkers who recently bought a home to recommend an agent. Most important when buying a home, check that there are no disclosures.

Proverbs 24:27 says, “Put your outdoor work in order and get your fields ready; after that, build your house.” When buying a home you need to be financially secure and learn skills for regular home maintenance and repairs such as changing the furnace filter and removing leaves and debris from gutters. A home requires a ton of work and money set aside for unexpected repairs. My brother Steve gave me great advice, “Before you move into your new home have the carpet and vents professionally cleaned to prevent allergies.” Now that we’ve overcome our challenges my family and I are enjoying our new home and I am learning skills for home repairs and maintenance. My support team’s insight and encouragement helped make the process of buying a home smoother. Best of all I have an office for my library of 5,000 books, a place to write my articles and books, and my daughter Makayla has a “Bluey” bedroom.

[i] An earnest money deposit is a sum of money paid by a buyer to a seller to show their commitment to purchasing a property.