February 2013

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RM MAGAZINE ISSUE 18

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Sue Bell founded Essex children’s charity ‘Kids Inspire’ in 2007. It is a community based organisation that aims to support vulnerable and disadvantaged young people and their families. Kids Inspire supports young people in Essex, so that they can feel valued and achieve their potential through therapy, counselling and mentoring. Our families can explore, understand and communicate their feelings. In turn this builds self-esteem, increases attainment and attendance at school and enables young people and their families to make positive choices. This process takes time and patience, but Kids Inspire is committed to turning lives around. Kids Inspire are proud to announce that they have been selected as the winners of the Mid Essex Business Award for Excellent Customer Service in the medium–sized business category. We are supported by the patronage of Anya Hindmarch (international fashion designer). We are also the chosen charity for Rathbone Perception Media, Essex County Cricket Club, Baker labels, Subway (Chelmsford branches) and The County Hotel for 2012. We have continued to receive amazing support from local businesses, such as STV Building Services, E2V, Britvic and M&G, who have supported us through donations and amazing activities over the past year.

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NEW YEAR, NEW CHALLENGE, SIGN UP NOW! 8/9 June 2013 Nightrider™ - an exciting 100km moonlit cycle ride past London’s iconic landmarks. A one day charity ride with a difference...it’s at night! While the capital sleeps, over £2 million will be raised in 1 night for hundreds of good causes. A unique London charity event. Set off from either Crystal Palace or Alexandra Palace and follow a 100km circular route past over fifty of London’s most famous landmarks. Encounter Tower Bridge, a deserted City of London, Canary Wharf, Hampstead Heath, London Zoo, Piccadilly Circus, British Museum, London Eye, Houses of Parliament, Trafalgar Square, Royal Albert Hall, Battersea Power Station and more.... Please sign up at www.kidsinspire.org.uk

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N E X T. C O . U K


From the

Editor Unsurprisingly, it snowed during January and everyone on Facebook suddenly became temporary employees of the Met Office. Rather surprisingly, the country didn’t come to a complete standstill. Possibly because everyone decided to update their Facebook status rather than venturing out onto the roads. Who knows? Before you get too engrossed in this month’s issue of RM, you will notice the magazine now has a fresher, cleaner feel to it. We thought that this was the perfect look for all of our fabulous Essex readers, so we hope you like it! In this month’s issue, producer Jonathan Sothcott talks about his eventful career, his new film ‘The Fall of The Essex Boys’ and the very obvious answer to a very obvious question. You’ll have to read it to find out what I’m talking about! You may have noticed that you’ve been seeing an increasing amount of mentions for RM Rewards throughout the magazine and across Essex; the continuing growth and its rapid success has been absolutely amazing, and the Rewards team are adding new rewards literally every day. We’re all really excited about what we’re going to see from RM Rewards in the very near future. Lastly, I know it’s only one day, but Valentines can definitely have a mention. There. Happy reading.

Tony Wittridge Editorial Director

Front cover image courtesy of PRshots/Kaliko Published by RM Magazine Ltd. Please note that while the publishers take care to be accurate, no liability will be accepted under any circumstance should any of the contents of this magazine be incorrect. All rights reserved. Reproduction of whole or in part without permission of the publisher is strictly prohibited. RM Magazine Ltd, 3-11 Grenfell Avenue, Hornchurch, Essex, RM12 4DN


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Meet the contributors

Art Editor Jade Warrington jade@rmmagazine.co.uk Media Sales Manager Rob Wittridge rob@rmmagazine.co.uk RM Rewards Maria Rackley maria@rmrewards.co.uk Staff Writers Leanne Tattoo Amber Sudbury Administration Brooke Warrington brooke@rmmagazine.co.uk

Rae Delanie Passfield Elizabeth Martinez Liz is currently studying BA(Hons) in Fashion Promotion at University, as well as being a designer here at RM. “This month the magazine has had a make over, we hope you like it just as much as we do!”

Rae is a student journalist based in Romford, giving you the details on all the latest on up-coming musicians. In this month’s Unsigned, Rae questions Essex indie rockers Held by Horses for the truth about being an unsigned band.

Leanne Tattoo Leanne currently works in a buying team for a high street fashion retailer. Feel the love this Valentine’s day with our heart themed style fashion goodies featured for this month.

Other Contributors: Jas Sagoo, Leddra Chapman and Hayley Baldwin

Angelo Mitakos Sophie Barnes

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Sophie is studying at the University of Greenwich in a Journalism and Public Relations course. She also wants to travel the world!

Angelo attends UCA, where Charlotte Long he is studying for a Fashion Promotion degree. Currently studying at South Essex College for a career in Informing young males the design industry. around the Essex area with the hottest looks and trends This month, Charlotte shows available on the highstreet. you the essential desktop gadgetry to get you through those long days at work!


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Contents 10

24 10

exclusive interview

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Jonathan Sothcott on his new movie release ‘The Fall of the Essex Boys’.

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FASHION

WELLBEING Read how your hair can speak volumes about your health and get the perfect seductive eyes for your special valentine.

HOMES & INTERIORS Our homes and interiors sponsor Roomes Furniture, showcasing the latest trends.

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Check out all the latest trends for Valentine’s Day.

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LIFESTYLE Read our mouth-watering American blueberry pancake recipe just in time for Shrove Tuesday, plus the review of Volkswagen’s newest Golf.

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ENTERTAINMENT Unsigned band Held by Horses, speak to RM in an exclusive interview, is Jimmy Carr’s gagging order in your area?

regulars 14

Women’s Fashion

16

Men’s Fashion

19

Get the Look

29

Ask Dr. Jas

30

Homes & Interiors

44

Car Review

48

Horoscopes

54

RM Loves

58

Gadget Guide


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Exclusive Interview

T T O C H T O S N JONATHA 10 | rmmagazine.co.uk


exclusive interview

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ead of programming for The Horror Channel at 24 and aspiring Bond producer, Jonathan Sothcott is one of the British film industries brightest stars, and after the success of ‘Rise of The Foot Soldiers’, Jonathan began the highly anticipated follow up, ‘The Fall of The Essex Boys’...

soon sussed out. From my point of view, I run my production company Richwater Films, the way I would any other business - I make a high quality product at as low a price as possible in order to sell it for the highest amount. There are also a wide range of tax breaks available, and I don’t mean dodgy tax evasion outfits, in order to encourage legitimate investors to support

... the distorted view that the film industry is a gold plated 24 hour Hollywood party...

Finding funding for indie films is quite a difficult task; how do you overcome this? Raising money for independent films is difficult, but not impossible, and once you have a track record it certainly becomes a little easier. I produced a film last year called The Rise & Fall of a White Collar Hooligan which was a big hit on DVD over the Summer and since then I’ve had people chasing me to invest because people want to be associated with success. The problem with film investment is, of course, that there are a lot of sharks in the pool. Because it isn’t a ‘bricks and mortar’ business - your finished product doesn’t have a fixed value the way that say, hoovers or cars do, which makes it easier for chancers and crooks to blind people with science and then have it away on their toes with the investors’ hard earned cash. The one good thing is that the industry doesn’t tolerate these people for long, its a very small community in which everybody knows everybody, so bad apples are

the creative industries. When I’m raising money to make a film, I take investments anywhere from £1,000 to £150,000 and endeavour to keep the investors as involved as possible - they get regular reports, invitations to special screenings etc. If you communicate with people, they realise that you’re looking after their investment and hopefully a bond of trust is built that continues from film to film with repeat business. You are an Ambassador for UK copyright awareness organisation, The Industry Trust, how did this come to be? Sometime back I had a random email asking if I could put The Industry Trust in touch with an actor I knew about a poster campaign. I did this 11


and before I knew it I’d sorted out another dozen of these posters in which celebrities pick their ‘Moment Worth Paying For’ - their favourite movie moment that they think is worth buying the film for legally, rather than downloading illegally. Piracy is a huge problem in my business and to be honest I don’t even like the term ‘pirates’ as it has a swashbuckling Erol Flynn connotation - let’s call them what they are, which is thieves.

Whether its The Krays, The Essex Boys or Jack The Ripper, we all want an invite into the criminal mind. These films are a lot of fun to make too, you work with people so much that it becomes like an extended family and I’m proud to count Danny Dyer, Nick Nevern and Craig Fairbrass, Billy Murray and Martin Kemp amongst my close friends having worked with them all so many times.

You wouldn’t steal a DVD of The Dark Knight Rises from Tesco, but by ripping it off a Bit Torrent site you’re doing exactly the same thing I understand that to a lot of people that feels like a victimless crime (going back to what I said about the film business not being a bricks and mortar one) but I assure you that it isn’t. There’s also the distorted view that the film industry is a gold plated 24 hour Hollywood party and it isn’t - its a struggling, underfunded business in which every single sale counts.

I actually love comedy, its my favourite genre of film, but I think for British comedy films to work they need real money spent on them and that glossy sheen that only comes with a high budget. That’s why they pay Hugh Grant the big bucks, he fills cinemas around the world. I have dabbled in it before but wasn’t successful, so for now at least, I’ll be sticking to the gangster stuff.

You landed the role of head of programming at The Horror Channel and you’re movies consist of horror-ish qualities (blood, violence, murder), is this a genre that you intend to stick with, or will we see a future romcom from yourself? I love horror movies, especially the old Hammer films and 80s stuff like Fright Night and The Lost Boys but I’m actually pretty squeamish. I’ve made a lot of horror movies, some good (Stalker, directed by Martin Kemp, Airborne, Devil’s Playground) and some awful (Strippers Vs Werewolves!!!) but to be honest I find the true crime/gangster/urban films more rewarding we’re all fascinated by dark characters and the world they inhabit, aren’t we? 12 | rmmagazine.co.uk

We’ve heard that you have an extremely large DVD collection. If you had time to save just 5 of your DVD’s, which ones would you save? I’ve just moved house, from West London to the Sussex Coast and putting all my DVDs into boxes really made me realise just how out of hand my DVD collection has got - nearly 2000! I have so many 80s action films, I love all that cheesy stuff and those big characters like Charles Bronson and Steven Seagal. But if I had to pick 5, I guess I’d go with…. 1. Jaws My favourite film of all time, 40 odd years on its still the perfect blend of thrills and drama. I fell in love with this movie when I was 3 and must have seen it at least once a year since! It made me terrified of sharks and love the seaside!


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2. Rocky I’m a big Stallone fan and love all the Rocky films and I can never decide which is my favourite between this, Rocky 3 and Rocky 4… but let’s stick with the classics and save the original! 3. OHMSS I’m obsessed with James Bond films, I love them all and though Roger Moore is my favourite Bond, this one is the perfect mix of great story, great soundtrack, beautiful girls and stunning locations. Lazenby makes a great 007 for one film but I’m glad he called it a day. He gives great swagger in this and apparently he could really have a fight (he knocked out Oliver Reed). 4. The Dark Knight Rises Christopher Nolan’s Batman trilogy is just amazing but for me this was the pinnacle, an epic in every sense of the word it absolutely blew me away. 5. The Long Good Friday I love British gangster films, from Get Carter to The Business, but if I had to pick one it’d be this one - Hoskins is iconic and that soundtrack is just so cool.

If I told you I’d have to kill you! Seriously though, the truth behind those murders will never be made public... If you could have produced any film in history, which one would you choose and why? A Bond film, any of them really - I am a Bond nut so would love the creative process but on top of that its the only real ‘safe bet’ in the film business - even the handful that didn’t perform well at the box office like License To Kill and The Man with the Golden Gun were blockbusters by anyone else’s standards. I believe something like 60% of the world’s population has seen a 007 film. However, they are the sole property of the Broccoli family so I can’t see that happening anytime soon. As such, I have to say I’d love to make a Dracula movie, he’s such a fascinating character. I’d not mind if it was period or modern, so long as he was scary like Christopher Lee, none of that sparkling Twilight shmultz, I just don’t buy it. Rise of the Foot Soldiers is the steady and gruesome rise of one of the most infamous criminal gangs in Essex. How true to the real story is it? If I told you I’d have to kill you! Seriously though, the truth behind those murders will never be made public. Footsoldier is a great crime movie,

brilliantly directed by Julian Gilbey with some stellar performances from Kierston Wareing, Billy Murray and, especially, Craig Fairbrass who was terrifyingly brilliant as Pat Tate. Footsoldier was based on the book Muscle, the autobiography of Carlton Leach, who I have met on a number of occasions and who has never been less than charming to me. So really Footsoldier is a film about Carlton Leach, the last 40 minutes of which bring the Essex Boys gang and their downfall into his story. What can we expect to see in Fall of the Essex Boys? The Fall of the Essex Boys, which I co-wrote the story for as well as produced, is the fourth film to feature the Rettendon Range Rover murders. As such it was crucial to find a new take on the story. I appreciate that there’s a lot of interest but it was important to me not to be seen flogging a dead horse. So the writer, Stephen Reynolds, and I came up with the idea of making it a police conspiracy thriller - we never really see the old bill in these films, but with all the urban myths about their involvement in this case, it seemed to make sense to make this the focus of our story. We’ve kept in everything audiences would expect - the pizza shop attack, the rave scene, the Amsterdam jaunts and all that but it was crucial to thread those within a fresh story. I think we succeeded. The story has always been fascinating to me - I remember the news reports of the murders - and of course the Leah Betts case - when I was at school, and funnily enough my father grew up in Rettendon. I know the guys who made Footsoldier and went to the premiere of that and so had a little bit of insight. So if you like, I’m a fan of these films, and when taking the project on set out not to short change myself, let alone any other viewers. I’m really proud of the cast I got together too - Nick Nevern, Robert Cavanah, Kate Magowan, Ewan Ross, Kierston Wareing and many more, they’re all fantastic in the movie. I really hope the audience feel there’s room for one more movie on this topic and give us a chance, and ultimately, that they like it. And finally, what’s been the best questions you’ve ever been asked in an interview? I made a really lame horror comedy called Strippers Vs Werewolves (sorry if you’ve seen it, no you cant have your money back) a few years ago and when I was doing the press I was constantly asked “what first attracted you to this project?” - if ever an answer was obvious from a title, it was that one!

The ‘Fall of the Essex Boys’ will be in selected cinemas from 8th February 2013 and released on DVD and BluRay on 18th February 2013. 13


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YOU FEEL The Love...

It’s that time of the year again and, whether you’re all loved up, happily settled down or still looking for your Mr Right, Valentine’s day is always a hot topic in February. Rather than waiting for a mystery gift from a secret admirer, why not treat yourself to one of our fab fashion buys decorated with cute hearts, all in the name of love!

1. BALCONY bra & knickers £17 & £8 Marks and Spencer

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2. AMETHYST HEART STUD EARRINGS £9 Martine Wester 3. STUDDED HEART CLUTCH £20 A Wear 4. FEaRNE COTTON HEART JUMPER £29 www.very.co.uk 5. heart wellies £9 ShoeZone 6. Heart Print Mid COURTS £23 Dorothy Perkins 7. radley TOTE £10 For The British Heart Foundation 8. Heart & Horse Tee £11.99 Internacionale 9. Heart pRINT dRESS £79 Phase Eight 10. HEART PRINT SKATER SKIRT £18 River Island 14 | rmmagazine.co.uk

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If you are feeling charitable, this versatile tote shopper from Radley isn’t only stylish but it includes a donation to the British Heart Foundation.

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Valentine’s Day,

The ESSEX Way....

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Fancy treating that special someone this Valentine’s Day? RM have searched the streets of Essex to bring you the best buys that won’t leave him feeling hard done by! Ensure love is in air, not disappointment!

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Make sure that your partner is not only looking good but smelling good! ‘Legend’ is the new fragrance by Mont Blanc available online and instore at The Perfume Shop for £36.50

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1. Sekonda watch £25 at Argos

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2. Russian doll tee £14 River Island 3. padded gilet £55 Republic 4. acid wash shirt £34 Topman 5. Folton River umbrella £20 House of Fraser 6. legend by mont blanc £36.50 The Perfume Shop 7. Loafers £165 Russell & Bromley 8. turtle neck jumper £75 French Connection 9. Cufflinks £19.50 M&S 10. wallet £45 Ted Baker 17


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Bikram Yoga Essex


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One fifth of the most successful British girl band ever, married to a footballing legend and with a fashion career that includes her own line and rubbing shoulders with some of the hottest people in the business, this month we show you how to get Mrs Beckham’s sort after look.

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1. Unisex Lambretta Cielo Mesh £90 www.watchshop.co.uk 2. Black Leather IPad Case £39 House of Fraser 3. Skinny Belt £8 ASOS 4. Paulomi Fringed Skull Blouse £11.50 www.missguided.co.uk

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5. Delight 2012 Black Patent BOOTS £79.20 www.alternative-footwear.co.uk 6. BURBERRY SUNGLASSES £187 www.sunglasshut.com 19


MAKE

UP Seductive Look... 1 Perfect style for Valentines Day

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It’s a NEWYear, want to win a NEWYou? To win 5 sets of make-up products featured in RM Beauty every month go to www.RMmagazine.co.uk

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Apply chosen foundation we have used Max Factor colour Adapt 45 Warm Almond. Conceal under the eyes and any areas that you wish, we have used NYX Concealer in a Jar in light, also prime eyelids with W7 Prime Magic Eye.

2. Apply NYX ES11 Iced Mocha into the crease of the eye, blend it with NYX Root Beer. 3. Darken the previous eyeshadow with NYX ES42 Grey and blend together. 4. Line the top lid with Barry M Liquid Liner in Black and apply Barry M Black Kohl pencil in the water line. 5. Under the water line apply NYX ES73 Red Head eye shadow and then apply Barry M Kohl pencil in red on top this. 6. Apply Gold Glitter Dust with eyelash glue in the inner corners of the eye and apply NYX lashes 122 Mod Squad. 7. Apply NYX PB14 Blusher in Spice and Barry M 147 Lipstick with Barry M Lip Gloss on top of the lipstick. 20 | rmmagazine.co.uk

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1. Barry M Liquid Liner 2. Barry M Lipstick 3. Max Factor Foundation 4. NYX Triple Eyeshadow Set 5. Barry M Gold Glitter Dust 6. W7 Prime Magic Primer 7. Barry M Lipgloss 8. NYX Lashes

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HAIR

UP Twisted side pony.. Perfect style for Valentines Day

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It’s a NEWYear, want to win a NEWYou? To win a GHD hairdryer featured in RM Beauty every month go to www.RMmagazine.co.uk

1. Section the hair into a halo section and pin the top up. 2. Pull hair to one side, twist and pin as you work from left to right. 3. Take down halo section, working horizontal backcomb one inch wide. 4. Follow this technique using horizontal sections to the front of the head. 5. Smooth backcomb with cushion brush, spray and pin to side.

Products 1. GHD hairspray 2. GHD hairdryer 3. Cushion brush 22 | rmmagazine.co.uk


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Bad Hair Year? Poor nutrition, hormone imbalances and high stress levels; your hair speaks volumes about your health. Are you making a statement with your hair, or is your hair making a statement about you?

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ong, lavish locks are the crowning glory of the Victoria Secrets Angels and L’Oreal faces such as Cheryl Cole. For some, it acts a s a security blanket, but for most, hair is what feathers are to peacocks, or what sunglasses are to Karl Lagerfeld; either way we need it. However, “Over 50% of men and women will experience thinning hair at some point in their lives” says Belgravia, the UK hair loss clinic. We may be ‘worth it’, but it doesn’t mean we have it. “Hair is an amazing barometer of our health,” says Iain Sallis the only hospital-based trichologist in the UK. There are vast and various reasons for lifeless hair ranging from simple diet adjustments, to complex medical reasons, to uncontrollable causes like genetics. The damage isn’t usually visible until a wider parting or a leaner ponytail is noticed, which causes women’s confidence to vanish even quicker. “There is no doubt that hair loss, hair fall and hair thinning (not necessarily the same) remain the number one anxiety-causing problem,” writes UK trichologist Philip Kingsley in his book The Hair Bible: A Complete Guide to Health and Care. But sometimes we’re bringing this upon ourselves. Lack of protein and vitamins, smoking, and being underweight are common causes of bad hair health. “Are you eating enough protein?” my hairdresser asks. No, I’m not. “Do you have a lot of protein in your diet?” enquires the shop assistant in Holland & Barrett when I ask about vitamins for the hair. There’s a pattern emerging here. “To be honest, eating more protein will have a much better effect than any supplements,” she advises. Since packing my body with meat and fish, more hairs have decided to stay with me.

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owever, we cannot always control the causes of poor hair condition. Thyroid disorders, illnesses, medication and genetic hair loss are other factors that can lead to distressed tresses. And incase the baby weight and stretch marks weren’t enough, pregnancy and child birth can also loosen locks. But the prize for the most thinned barnets, should go to stress. Alopecia is a demon that steals chunks of hair and can refuse to give it back. There are different forms, but with Alopecia Areata, stress is the most common culprit. “There have been a number of reports on individual cases where clearly defined sudden stress events have preceded Alopecia Areata”, explains Belgravia. Symptoms include large amounts of head and body hair falling out, creating bald patches and even scarring. This is something TV presenter Gail Porter knows chillingly well, but she’s not alone. “I started losing the hair on my eyebrows,” says Paula Brewin, who has been suffering from alopecia for two years. “The doctor tested my blood for an underactive thyroid, but put it down to stress when it came back clear. He said there was nothing they could do.” As her stress increased, her hair decreased. “I started pencilling in my 24 | rmmagazine.co.uk

brows, but I was conscious that I’d accidentally rub them off.” She lifts up her fringe to reveal cosmetically enhanced eyebrows and a shiny patch on her hairline where the follicles have been permanently stripped, “thankfully it has stopped coming out, but it has thinned.” It might seem bizarre to say Brewin is lucky, but at least she’s kept her head hair and lashes, giving hope to those who have been diagnosed. “If you think you have alopecia, go to your doctor and be more pushy. I wish I was.” A less cruel but more common form of hair loss is telogen effluvium. Stick with me, it’s simple. Hair has two phases: growing and resting. “If there is a “shock to the system” such as childbirth, stress, or illness “as many as 70% of the scalp hairs can be precipitated into a resting state” explains the NHS. This almost reverses the growing-resting ratio. About two months after the ‘shock’, the new hairs start to come through, pushing out the resting ones. So in this case, hair fall is a sign of hair growth.

The NHS say telogen effluvium is “self-correcting” but “gentle handling of the hair…and any type of scalp massage are important.” When it comes to putting the life back into our locks, Kinglsey says a common problem is that “many people read about changing their eating habits and taking all the right pills, but get fed up with it if they don’t see results quickly – and stop”. Thickening up a head of hair takes time; it’s like reprogramming your body. “I assure you that perseverance will pay off. That means patience – do it and you will see” advises Kingsley. There are also hundreds of products on the market that claim to plump up your tresses, but it won’t matter what you put on your head, if the problem is in your head.

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allis is creating an army to combat hair problems by working with Habia, the government-approved standards-setting for hairdressing training. Together they’re “working out a brand new course that hairdressers can come on and find out more about the hair and scalp.” As Brewin knows, Sallis believes there is a lack of help identifying hair issues. “Doctors are not particularly interested, as hair loss alone will never lead to death, and hairdressers usually only know the things that the product manufacturers tell them to sell their ‘miracle product.’”


wellbeing

This programme will run from March and ensure clients are receiving the correct advice and can be referred to specialists, making a trip to the hairdressers more beneficial than ever.

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ew developments are also being teased out. “The future will see a lot of new medications,” reveals Sallis, one being Bimataprost, an ingredient found to fuel eyelash growth, which is currently being tested on scalp hair. Such developments will alleviate problems like hair loss and turning gray, along with “hair cloning, which means we will be able to manipulate stem cells to correct hair loss problems!” The future of hair looks full-bodied, but don’t worry if your locks are far from lustrous, at this time of year everyone wears a hat anyway.

Sallis’ Top 5 Tips for Healthy Hair 1. Eat the right foods. Don’t exclude any food types and eat plenty of protein. 2. Don’t over process your hair. Avoid bleaching and perms – any type of chemical service will harm the hair. 3. Only use straighteners once a week at the most and make sure they’re below 180˚c. Be careful of the permanent straightening systems too, they can damage the hair if done incorrectly! 4. Use good hair products: shampoo, conditioner and a regular hair masque. The majority of the look and feel of your hair will rely on them. 5. U.V light is the single most natural damaging substance to hair. Use products that contain a U.V filter and wear a hat in strong sun light If you’re worried about your hair, visit www.nhs.uk for more information.

written by hayley baldwin

www.fashioninsideher.wordpress.com/2012/11/15/bad-hair-year/ Image courtesy of PRshots/Apricot 25


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There are two ways to get your teeth into better shape and so give you more confidence in your day to day life. One way is to have porcelain veneers or cosmetic bonding or you could have braces. With porcelain veneers or cosmetic bonding we can close gaps and reshape teeth and gums to give a perfect smile.

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This could be done in just one to three visits. If you are happy with your teeth shape you could opt for an invisible brace to correct ant crooked or spaced teeth.

I can give you the “perfect smile”

You will feel so much more confident after the treatment; nearly everyone we treat at Perfect Smile Spa wish they had come to us years ago!!

AT PERFECT SMILE SPA we can give you the confidence of a fabulous new smile at a price you will be able to afford!

I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me my perfect smile and younger complexion.

I can give you the “perfect smile” - Natalie AT PERFECT SMILE SPA we can give you the confidence of a fabulous new smile at a price you will be able to afford!

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Duresta Range Duresta offer an extensive range of internationally sourced luxurious fabrics for their high quality and handmade sofa ranges. Each piece of fabric is individually hand cut and expertly sewn, coupled with a separate valance applied by hand slipstitching. Using Classic English Style whilst catering for changing tastes, the Duresta range is a fine example of subtle refinement.

@roomesfurniture 30 | rmmagazine.co.uk

/roomesfurniture


homes & interiors

Hornblower Range

Waldolf Range

Southsea Range

Trafalgar Range

The makers of Duresta have retained the lifelong skills of dedicated craftsmen, and have built a solid reputation for the company and Duresta’s experienced and specialist crafters have been with the company for over 30 years. The tailored fabrics are individually hand cut, arm pleats are individually handcrafted with expertly finished deep buttoning and separate valances applied by hand slipstitching. 31


TO

BU

Y

On The Market Brentwood ÂŁ420,000

5 bedroom semi-detached house Within the St. Martins School catchment area, offering five double bedrooms with en-suite to master and two further bathrooms. This deceptively spacious home offers a kitchen of 19ft x 13ft and a lounge of 30ft in length. The property is modernised to a good standard throughout and has off street parking for several cars, detached garage and garden backing onto agricultural land which provides stunning rear views.

To view this property or request more details, contact Hetheringtons, Shenfield 218 Hutton Road, Shenfield, Brentwood, Essex, CM15 8NR 0843 313 0722

32 | rmmagazine.co.uk


BU

Y

homes & interiors

Hornchurch £410,000

TO

4 bedroom semi-detached house Semi-detached, heavily extended and in an amazing show home condition. You really must visit this fantastic family home which has been recently extended and completely refurbished throughout to appreciate the accommodation and quality it has to offer. On arrival at this super family abode you’ll realise from the outset that it has a vast amount of space on offer, perfect for an already large family or one that is currently expanding.

TO

BU

Y

To view this property or request more details, contact Douglas Allen, 133A High Street, Hornchurch, Essex, RM11 1TX 0843 313 5241

Ramsey £300,000

2 bedroom detached house

An impressive detached chalet style residence occupying a mature plot approaching half an acre with delightful countryside views. This fine home has been refurbished by the current owners, offering a tastefully decorated interior with high quality kitchen, shower and bathroom fitments along with oil fired central heating, garage and off road parking for a number of vehicles.

To view this property or request more details, contact Fenn Wright, 146 High Street Colchester CO1 1PW 0843 313 6651

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Station Road, Upminster, Essex RM14 2UB 34 | rmmagazine.co.uk


TO

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homes & interiors

Hornchurch ÂŁ950pcm

2 bedroom terraced house 2 bedroom mid terrace house, located in Hornchurch. Internally the property offers fitted kitchen with appliances, Modern bathroom with shower over bath and double bedrooms. Externally the property offers detached garage, driveway and a 50ft rear garden.

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To view this property or request more details, contact Dixsons (R) Estates, 188 High Street, Hornchurch, RM12 6QP 0843 315 0559

Romford ÂŁ850pcm

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Situated within a short walk of the shops and train station at Romford, this modern 2 bed 2 bath apartment with secure gated residents parking is a must see for any tenant looking for good quality accommodation.

To view this property or request more details, contact Stoneshaw Estates, 271 Heathway, Dagenham, RM9 5AQ 020 3324 7500

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VALENTINES

3.

GIFTS

For Her...

1.

Every girl loves being spoilt and expects to be just that on Valentine’s Day. Struggling on what to get that special lady? Look no further as RM has come to the rescue with a gift guide to impress, making sure you lads get it right this year! That’s right no tacky teddies and flowers for a fiver.

4. 1. PANDORA CHARM £30 Pandora 2. LOUBOUTINS £635 www.christianlouboutin.com 3. MISS DIOR PERFUME £46 www.boots.com 4. DIOR ADDICT LIPSTICK £24 www.boots.com 5. MODELS OWN MAKE UP BRUSH SET £10 www.boots.com 6. ALPHABET TRUFFLES £19.99 www.thorntons.com 7. ME TO YOU FIGURE £16.50 www.metoyouonline.com 8. WAHANDA SPA&BEAUTY VOUCHER £25 www.wahanda.com 9. BLOSSOM FLORIST 12 rED rOSES £32.99 www.blossom-florists.co.uk 10. Blossom Florist gift sets From £32.99 www.blossom-florists.co.uk 36 | rmmagazine.co.uk

2.


lifestyle

5.

7.

9.

8.

Spa days are always a great gift for your partner. Buy her a Wahanda voucher so she can choose what spa or beauty treatment, where and when. There are 307 participating venues in Essex!

6. 10.

37


Dresses, Heels &

Lingerie

RED HOT

If you’re lucky enough to have a partner who will treat you to an evening out this Valentine’s night why not spoil yourself and give that all important confidence boost. No matter your taste, RM has it covered with these gorgeous dresses, heels and that all important lingerie for afters...

1. Kelly Brook bra & Thong £12.99 & £5.99 New Look 2. Cut out body con £28.99 www.missguided.co.uk 3. Pom pom peeptoe heels £23 www.missguided.co.uk 4. Ted Baker Bra & Briefs £22.50 & £10.50 Debenhams 5. Flapper dress £99.99 Mango at www.asos.com 6. Premium collection Sandals £78 Topshop 7. Ted Baker Bra & Brief £30 & £15 House Of Fraser 8. Rose print maxi £20 www.boohoo.com 9. Nude heels £30 Next 10. Sequin push up bra & tHONG £14.99 & £5.99 H&M 11. Peplum dRESS £60 Lipsy 12. Multi glitter heels £36 www.boohoo.com 13. Balconette bra AND SHORTS £12.99 & £6.99 H&M 14. Contrast dress £27.99 www.missguided.co.uk 15. Platform ankle boots £47.50 New Look 38 | rmmagazine.co.uk

1.

FASHIONISTA

4.

2.

5.

HOT BUY

3.

6.


lifestyle

Colourful & comfy

7.

LBD TWIST

GLITZ & GLAM

10.

13.

11. 8.

14.

12.

9.

15. This peplum by Lipsy with a mesh panel on the back is a silhouette which is here to stay, no surprise considering it looks amazing on any shape. Match with these multi glitter peeptoe heels with Louboutin inspired red soles. Keep some glitz under wraps with this dark blue push up bra and thong. 39


VALENTINES

GIFTS

For Him...

3. 2.

With the shops traditionally crammed with presents for us lucky girls, it’s down to us to rack our brains and think of the perfect gift that he will love. Still unsure what to get? Then here are some ideas to start you off.

1.

4.

40 | rmmagazine.co.uk


lifestyle

5.

8.

9. 6.

1. GHETTOBLASTER BAG £44.99 www.truffleshuffle.co.uk

7.

If he likes speed he will love this! Choose from a Lamborghini, Ferrari, Audi R8 and Aston Martin to race around the track. He will also get to experience a high speed ride in the hands of a professional. The nearest participating venue is Brands Hatch, Kent.

2. YSL L’HOMME £34 www.boots.com 3. FOOTBALL SHIRT £23 www.JJBsports.com 4. T-shirt folder £14.99 www.prezzybox.com 5. PHOTO PANEL £9.99 www.boots.com 6. JACK DANIEL’S GIFT SET £22 www.buyagift.co.uk 7. SUPERCAR DRIVING EXPERIENCE £199 www.virginexperiencedays.co.uk 8. RUGBY TICKETS £27.25 www.ticketmaster.co.uk 9. ICE WATCH £71.25 www.ice-watch.com 41


The Good, the Bad and the OMG’s!

Chris curley, 30, single...still

Amy Lockley, 17

Charlotte & Paul, together 5 years

I had been speaking to this guy John for a few months that I met online. We decided that we were going to meet for a drink on the coming Friday. After enjoying a few wines with my colleagues I set off to meet him. Whilst he found a table I headed to the bar, returning with two beers and took a seat. TO MY SURPRISE THE STOOL WASN’T THERE!! I fell back and in the momentum rolled into the table behind knocking their beers all over my face! I jumped to my feet and quickly pulled the stool to the table sat down muttering OMG I am so embarrassed. John pushed the 2 beers in my direction and said lets do this another time and walked out!

Every year my dad sends me a bunch of roses. Last year my boyfriend and my dad had a competition who could get me the best bunch. My dad will always win!

Every year Paul forgets to get me a valentines card, so last year I designed him a joke card on moon pig reading – ‘Worlds worst boyfriend’ to come home to a candle light dinner cooked and some flowers. I couldn’t have felt any worse!

Becca Longmire, 28

Jade & John – Together 1 year

Lawrence, 24

My friend set me up on a double date, with her and her boyfriend. Me and this guy started awkwardly chatting, he had garlic breath which was the first biggest turn off, then all of a sudden his secret girlfriend stormed into the restaurant and hit him round the head with a bunch of flowers and chucked the basket of bread in my face.

Last valentine’s day John took me to see ‘The Lion king’ and asked me to be his girlfriend in the interval, we had a nice romantic KFC afterwards.

Last Valentine ’s Day my parents were away, so I invited my girlfriend over for a meal and I wanted to pull out all the stops. I sent my little sister to stay round her friend’s house so that we had the house to ourselves. About eight o’clock the dinner was ready and I heard my girlfriend scream from the dining room. My little sister’s hamster had escaped! My girlfriend and I spent 2 hours trying to find and catch it! The night was ruined.

42 | rmmagazine.co.uk


lifestyle

T

. . . e n i t n e l a V r u o From y

he first legend, and perhaps the best known, began in Rome when the Emperor, Claudius II, was involved in many bloody and unpopular campaigns. “Claudius the Cruel” as he was called, was having a difficult time getting soldiers to join his military leagues and he believed that the reason for this was because the Roman men did not want to leave their loved ones or families. So he cancelled all marriages and engagements in Rome!

The good Saint Valentine, a Roman priest in Rome 269 A.D. together with his friend Saint Marius, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine’s actions were discovered, he was sentenced to be beaten to death with clubs and have his head cut off. Nice. But while in prison, it is believed that Valentine fell in love with a young girl, speculated to have been the jailor’s daughter. She visited him during his confinement and before his death on the 14th day of February, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter which he signed...

“From your Valentine” In 496 A.D., Pope Gelasius set aside February 14 to honor St. Valentine.

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The Continental GT 44 | rmmagazine.co.uk

BENTLEY


lifestyle

B

entley’s new open-top performance flagship model - and the world’s fastest four-seat convertible - made its international debut on 14th January at the North American International Auto Show, Detroit. The new GT Speed Convertible combines the sensory pleasures of roof-down luxury touring with the shattering performance of a 625 PS (616 bhp) twin-turbocharged 6.0 litre W12, while delivering a fifteen per cent improvement in fuel efficiency. The close-ratio eight-speed transmission, uprated and lowered suspension and retuned steering provide exhilarating acceleration and sharp, communicative handling without detriment to the renowned ride comfort of Bentley’s Continental convertible. Permanent all-wheel drive ensures optimum traction and power delivery whatever the road conditions. Taking its place at the pinnacle of the Bentley Continental range, the new GT Speed Convertible has a top speed of 202 mph (325 km/h) and in true Bentley style, no compromises have been made in craftsmanship, luxury or refinement to deliver this unrivalled performance. Subtle sporting design cues include exclusive 21-inch alloy wheels, dark-tint grilles and ‘rifled’ exhaust tail pipes. Inside its handcrafted cabin, the GT Speed convertible features the Mulliner Driving Specification as standard, blending contemporary luxury with a distinctly sporting character. Powertrain: 12 cylinders, 625 PS (616 bhp) and 8 gears The Continental GT Speed convertible shares its powertrain specification with its Bentley stablemate the GT Speed coupé. The 625 PS (616 bhp) twin-turbocharged, 48-valve, W12 engine powers the new convertible to 60 mph in 4.1 seconds (0-100 km/h in 4.4 s.) and onto a top speed of 202 mph (325 km/h). Nought to 100 mph (160 km/h) is despatched in only 9.7 seconds. Peak torque – an impressive 800 Nm (590 lb.ft) – is reached at just 2000 revs/min and maintains that level through to 5000 revs/ min for effortless, refined performance at all times.

The latest ME17 engine management system, capable of performing 180 million individual calculations per second, provides enhanced turbocharger control and torque management, enhancing driveability. In common with all W12-engined models, the GT Speed convertible features an energy recuperation system. Together with a close-ratio, quick-shifting eight-speed transmission, this has resulted in a 15 per cent improvement in fuel economy and CO2 emissions compared with the first generation Speed, with a commensurate increase in tank range.

T

he new GT Speed Convertible’s powertrain is even more tractable than its Speed predecessor, and just as fuel-efficient as the new W12 Continental GT. Switching the gear selector to ‘Sport’ mode however demonstrates the dual personality of the new GT Speed convertible, delivering a sharper throttle response, gear-shifting at higher engine speeds and faster ‘block shifting’ (e.g 8th direct to 4th gear) for instantly accessible acceleration. The enhanced performance is accentuated by a glorious baritone snarl from the free-breathing exhaust, a thrilling soundtrack to the magnificent powerhouse under the bonnet.

...no compromises have been made in craftsmanship, luxury or refinement to deliver this unrivalled performance Exterior – the darker side of Bentley design From outside, the Continental GT Speed convertible is distinguished by a matrix radiator grille and bumper air intakes in a dark-tint chrome finish. The 21” Speed alloy wheels are unique to this model, and are available in silver or an optional dark tint. Large, elliptical exhaust tailpipes feature a rifled interior, while a further, subtle design touch is revealed when the bonnet is opened – the black inlet manifold is unique to the Continental Speed models. As with the GT Speed coupé, the winged ‘B’ badge which crowns the radiator shell is set upon a black enamel background.

45


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The front wings of the GT Speed Convertible are created in superformed aluminium, their seamless form and crisply-defined body creases creating an impression of tension and muscularity. The 10 mm lower suspension and unique 21” wheels accentuate the wide, low and poised stance. Despite the supercar performance, additional spoilers are unnecessary – the gentle lip on the double-horseshoe bootlid generates all the downforce the GT Speed Convertible needs, even at over 200 mph (325 km/h). Interior: sumptuous, exclusive luxury and advanced technology Inside, exclusive treadplates featuring the ‘Speed’ legend welcome you to a four-seat cabin that features the hand-craftsmanship of the Mulliner Driving Specification, with its distinctive diamond-quilted hide upholstery. For the Continental GT Speed models Bentley offers an exclusive Dark Tint Aluminium ‘engine spin’ finish, inspired by the dashboards of the Le Mans winning Bentleys of the 1920s. Its understated shade is the perfect complement to the exterior’s dark tint chrome radiator and bumper grilles. Other optional finishes include the full range of fine wood veneers and a satin-finish Carbon Fibre option for fascia and centre console. The infotainment system features Bentley’s latest software upgrades, which vary from region to region but include refinements such as point of interest mapping, optional

46 | rmmagazine.co.uk

satellite landscape imagery, live traffic data and, where the infrastructure supports it, digital radio. The system features 15 Gigabytes of available music space, as well as the facility to play music via an iPod, MP3 player, the car’s own six-disc CD changer or SD card.

F

lat panel Balanced Mode Radiator (BMR) speakers, which combine the functions of separate tweeter and midrange speakers in one unit, direct the sound with accuracy and provide greater clarity across the audible spectrum. Alternatively, the audiophile Naim for Bentley system, incorporating custom-built speakers and eight individual Digital Sound Processing modes, is available as an option. As a thoughtful touch, the audio balance settings automatically alter when the roof is lowered to compensate for the change in listening environment. The result of Bentleys approach to this flagship model is an exhilarating combination of performance and practicality; a Bentley that can tackle a sun-drenched boulevard, snowy alpine pass or ‘Brentwood High Street’ on a Friday evening with equal aplomb. To find out more go online www.bentleymotors.com or visit your local dealer.


heading

The Golf Reborn V

T

his month, RM Magazine were invited down to the recently refurbished Volkswagen Romford to celebrate the launch of the new Volkswagen Golf Mk 7. It’s hard to believe the Volkswagen Golf was first launched in 1974, back when ‘The Waltons’ were on TV, Carl Douglas had a number 1 hit with ‘Kung Fu Fighting’ and Kate Moss was a new born baby. Like Kate Moss though, the Volkswagen Golf is still in high demand and looking better than ever. Packed with gadgets and gizmos guaranteed to make your driving experience easier, safer and ultimately more enjoyable.

(

)

( 6.8 )

( 4.6 ); extra urban 62.8

olkswagen Romford mentioned that they had a treat for us, and oh boy, they did not disappoint. We walked in to the 13 car showroom and we were amazed to see a pristine example of each model released over the years, it gave us and fellow customers a real insight into the evolution of this much loved car. Next month you can read our full review of the new Mk7 Golf, but if you can’t wait that long, we highly recommend that you head down to Volkswagen Romford and get a closer look or visit www.volkswagen-romford.co.uk or call 01708 330540.

for details. Official fuel consumption in mpg ( 4.5 ) – 85.6 ( 3.3 ); combined 53.3 ( 5.3 ) – 74.3 ( 3.8 ). CO 2

Das Auto. 47


Horoscopes m

Aquarius

(January 21st - February 19th)

Money will be going out as quickly as it comes in throughout early February. There are so many attractive clothes and accessories in stores, you simply won’t be able to resist. The good news is, you’ve never looked better. Finding love will be as easy as crooking your finger in the direction of your intended victim. An authority figure will try to destroy your confidence around the 10th. Turn a deaf ear to their criticisms, or it will be difficult to realise your potential. Valentine’s Day will be a lavish affair, with your amour taking you to a five star restaurant. You’ll also be given a beautiful gift of jewellery or art. If you’re single, you will meet someone special when you’re out and about maybe at a dance club, cinema or theatre. The two of you are deeply attracted to each other, but will have difficulty letting down your defences, especially as February turns to March.

Pisces

Aries

Gemini

(March 21st - April 20th)

(May 22nd - June 21st)

You’ll have to be the assertive one with friends or loved ones around the 4th. Indeed friendship could turn to romance if you make the first move in early February. Good news from a loved one, neighbour, or in-law arrives around the middle of the month tempting you to relax any strict cash controls, but this will not be the time to either lend or borrow money. Arrange a romantic rendezvous with your amour on Valentine’s Day and if you’re thinking of campaigning for changes at work, in your neighbourhood or even nationally wait until the second half of the month when financial support from a surprising source will come your way. An old lover will get back in touch on or around the 18th, but don’t give them any encouragement. The 21st is perfect for all kinds of intuitive or creative pastimes and projects. Don’t sign any important papers or make any formal agreements as March hoves into sight or you will quickly discover you’ve made a commitment you can’t keep or put someone else in a very difficult position.

You’ll make a big splash at the beginning of February, provided you dress for success. Take this opportunity to add some attractive pieces to your wardrobe. Go ahead and spend a little more than usual for added impact. Don’t be discouraged if an educational or cultural organisation turns down your application near the 10th. You’ll have a better opportunity to expand your horizons, without the strictures of a stuffy institution. Valentine’s Day lifts your spirits, thanks to an extravagant gift from a lover. It will give you great pleasure to show off this bauble. The final days of the month will get stressful, thanks to a conflict between your personal and public lives. Your family doesn’t understand just how many obligations you have. You can’t just drop them on a whim; people are counting on you. Don’t let a relative lay a heavy guilt trip on you. You don’t deserve it.

Taurus

Cancer

(February 20th - March 20th)

(April 21st - May 21st)

(June 22nd - July 23rd)

You’ll be a lot more aggressive in the early days of February. You’re tired of letting rivals overshadow you. Take this opportunity to enter a contest, audition for a show, or go on a job interview. The powers that be will be impressed by your enthusiasm and initiative. Don’t let your inner critic deter you from applying to schools in the days surrounding the 10th. It’s time to develop your raw talent. Valentine’s Day enhances your sex appeal, putting you in the driver’s seat for the entire holiday. Take this opportunity to wrap your lover around your little finger. A beautiful gift, candlelit dinner, spa treatment your wish is their command on this magical day! Resist the pressure to sign a contract on or around the 25th. You can get better terms if you advocate for your interests. It will take a week or two to get what you want, but you will prevail if you refuse to be intimidated.

The opening days of February find you making friends with a lot of creative types. Don’t be surprised if you’re inspired to play music, write some poetry, or make some handcrafts as a result of their influence. Too often, you suppress your artistic impulses in favour of more practical demands. While your dutiful attitude is admirable, it has also caused you a great deal of sadness. You can’t be happy unless you’re making something beautiful. A career opportunity arrives on the 10th, creating some tension between you and a business or romantic partner. Reassure your friend this position won’t undermine your relationship. If you’re single, you may be inspired to steer a friendship into romantic waters on Valentine’s Day. The two of you share so many interests, it’s only natural you fall in love. If you already have a lover, join forces to realise a cherished dream. Together, you will accomplish great things. A fun trip won’t go according to plan at the end of the month; be as flexible as possible.

You’ll be in hot pursuit of romance as February gets started. Don’t let the object of your affection slip through your fingers. If you’re already in a relationship, play the part of an ardent admirer. You’ll get an enthusiastic response from your amour. It might even feel like the two of you are falling in love all over again. The 10th warns against spending beyond your means; pay cash whenever it’s possible. Running up big credit card bills will cause tremendous regret later on. Valentine’s Day will especially lovely this year, ending with a passionate bedroom encounter. If you’re single, you could meet someone special through a blind date. Let a friend set you up with a mutual acquaintance. You won’t be sorry. A rejection letter will arrive near the 25th, but don’t despair. This obstacle will force you to take a direction you wouldn’t have otherwise considered. When one door closes, another opens. It’s the unwritten law of the Universe.

48 | rmmagazine.co.uk


lifestyle

It's the New Year! Find out what Russell Grant has instore for you...!

Leo

(July 24th - August 23rd)

Libra

(September 24th - October 23rd)

An intimate relationship heats up in the beginning of The beginning of February is perfect for launching a February. You’ll be able to shake off your inhibitions fitness regimen. Swimming, dancing, and skating can with your lover, making for some fabulous bedroom keep you trim. You prefer exercise that has an element encounters. If you’re single, you will meet someone of artistry to it. You’re not the type who enjoys plodding special at a dance club, photography exhibit, or poetry away on a treadmill for hours on end. Romance reading. Keep your eyes open for a dreamy artist. and finance do not mix around the 11th. Don’t feel Don’t get pressured into signing a contract in the days pressured to buy a lover an expensive gift you can’t surrounding the 10th. A binding agreement seems afford. Valentine’s Day favours a quiet evening with attractive now, while you need security, but you’ll the object of your affection. Prepare a lavish meal for come to bitterly regret its restrictions later. Be sure your amour in the comfort of your own home. It will to wear something provocative on Valentine’s Day to be easier to get intimate in comfortable surroundings. whet your lover’s appetite. If given a choice, opt for an The final days of February bring an embarrassing intimate dinner instead of a lavish outing. The two of you will want some privacy. Money will be scarce at the secret to light. Try not to judge a colleague too harshly. You never know what you would do if the tables were end of the month, particularly if you keep indulging in creature comforts. Downsizing your lifestyle will be a turned. Still, now you know your their true colours, it is valuable exercise in restraint. best to keep a healthy distance.

Virgo

Scorpio

Sagittarius

(November 23rd - December 21st) The first days of February are perfect for launching a home improvement program. Take this opportunity to create a tranquil retreat. A relaxing boudoir, entertainment room, bathroom, or studio will increase the value of the place. It will also prompt you to spend more time at home. The days surrounding the 10th warn against buying into the worst case scenario. Your inner critic is trying to protect you from taking a risk. Unfortunately, you need to do something entirely out of character if you’re going to move forward. You may experience a temporary financial setback as a result. Still, that’s better than falling victim to fear. Take a test, apply for a job, or move to a new neighbourhood. You’ll have to make a choice between your private and public lives at the end of February. At this juncture, you can’t afford to disappoint an authority figure. Err on the side of professional responsibilities, even if this upsets your family.

Capricorn

(August 24th - September 23rd)

(October 24th - November 22nd)

(December 22nd - January 20th)

Take the lead in a business or romantic partnership in the early days of February. You have very definite ideas about how a team project should be executed. Waiting for your partner to take the initiative will just waste valuable time. Fortunately, you have both the experience and tact to make this endeavour successful. Turn a deaf ear to a colleague who tries to undermine your confidence. Valentine’s Day will be one of the most exciting days of the year. A passionate declaration of love marks a turning point in your relationship. Don’t let a close friend deter you from making a personal transformation at the end of the month. You need to make a change, even if it’s inconvenient for the people you love. Launch a fitness regimen, get a makeover, or break a bad habit. A happier, healthier you will emerge as February turns to March. Get ready for your close up!

February gets off to an exciting start, when you enter an exciting competition. Your chances for winning are strong. Even if you don’t take first place, your performance will get favourable attention. It will be gratifying to develop a fan base after working in obscurity for so long. The 10th warns against getting in an argument with a stubborn relative. The two of you have entirely different approaches to life. Trying to convert each other will be an exercise in futility. You either have to agree to disagree or cut ties altogether. Valentine’s Day offers a welcome change to let off steam. Your amour will send you a sexy message that makes your pulse pound. If you’re single, you will meet someone special in a classroom, book club, or discussion group. Resist the urge to back out of a social engagement at the end of the month. Friendship takes precedence over romance as February turns to March.

February gets underway with several opportunities to travel, write, and study. If you see a class that interests you, sign up immediately. Spots will go fast. You will make several friends among your fellow pupils, at least one of which will play an important part in your romantic life. Resist the urge to change your look around the 10th, or you will regret it. This is not a good time to cut or colour your hair, and plastic surgery is out of the question. Instead of transforming your outward appearance, focus on making internal changes. Stop beating yourself up for a career disappointment that was out of your control. Replace self defeating thoughts with personal affirmations. Your sex appeal will be red hot on Valentine’s Day; you’ll be able to wrap your amour right around your little finger.

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Recipe Of The Month Courtesy of BBC Good Food

Pancake Day 12st February Have a special Pancake Day breakfast by indulging in some light and fluffy US style pancakes, whilst taking advantage of the berry season and pouring a glass of fruity goodness to go with it.

American Blueberry Pancakes

108 calories - preparation time, 35 mins, makes 10

1. Mix together the flour, baking powder and a pinch of salt in a large bowl. 2. Beat the egg with the milk, make a well in the centre of the dry ingredients and whisk in the milk to make a thick smooth batter. Beat in the melted butter, and gently stir in half the blueberries. 3. Heat a teaspoon of oil or small knob of butter in a large non-stick frying pan. Drop a large tablespoonful of the batter per pancake into the pan to make pancakes about 7.5cm across. 4. Make three or four pancakes at a time. Cook for about 3 minutes over a medium heat until small bubbles appear on the surface of each pancake, then turn and cook another 2-3 minutes until golden. 5. Cover with kitchen paper to keep warm while you use up the rest of the batter. Serve with golden syrup and the rest of the blueberries.

Ingredients

200g self-raising flour 1 tsp baking powder 1 egg 300ml milk knob butter 150g pack blueberries sunflower oil or a little butter for cooking golden or maple syrup

50 | rmmagazine.co.uk


lifestyle

Breakfast Smoothie

123 calories - preparation time 5 mins, easy

1. Slice the banana into your blender or food processor and add the berries of your choice. Whizz until smooth. 2. With the blades whirring, pour in juice or water to make the consistency you like. Toss a few extra fruits on top, drizzle with honey and serve.

TRY Instead of banana, use melon or a slightly over-ripe mango or to make an extra-creamy smoothie add a pot of low-fat natural yogurt.

Ingredients

1 small ripe banana 140g blackberries, blueberries, raspberries or strawberries (or use a mix), plus extra to serve Apple juice or mineral water, (optional) Runny honey, to serve

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Top 10 Tips to keep you in shape this Spring

Written by Amber Sudbury

Christmas is well and truly over and there’s no escaping that the excuses for not cracking on with your new fitness regime are starting to wear thin. Simply starting can sometimes be the toughest obstacle to overcome, so if you’re unsure as to what to do first, we’ve got 10 simple tips to help you get the ball rolling. Set an achievable target Whether it’s a certain dress size, inches or body fat, set a target for what you hope to achieve. Be sure to make a note of your weight and measurements before you begin so that you can see the difference that you’re achieving. Sometimes it seems as though nothing is changing, when in actual fact you may have lost an inch and just not realised! Be realistic Don’t expect to lose 2 stone in a month, it’s unrealistic and unhealthy. Set a target that you know that you can achieve, you’ll feel great when you reach it quickly, and you can always set another! Enjoy it! If the thought of running makes you want to suddenly clean the fridge, then don’t do it, you’ll only start to dread going for a run. Instead, think about the activities that you already enjoy doing and see how you can incorporate them into a workout. Eat well Exercise coupled with the wrong diet will only put a strain on your body. Choose foods that will compliment your exercise regime. For instance, if you’re lifting weights at the gym and therefore building muscle, eat more protein. Whereas, if you’re starting a Zumba class which is more cardio, eat more carbs. Make a start If you’re serious about getting into shape, then just do it! Don’t wait for Monday; start today! If you’ve decided that you want to change, then start straight away; you may change your mind tomorrow.

52 | rmmagazine.co.uk

Cheat a little Don’t suddenly ban chocolate from your diet; it’ll only make you want it more! Set a rule so that you have a chance to indulge. You could say that for one day of the week you can eat whatever you want, or treat yourself to one little naughty treat every day. Stay motivated If you’ve seen a gorgeous dress that you absolutely love in your favourite clothing shop, use it as an incentive to help you get into shape, and once you’ve reached the target that you’ve set for yourself, you can buy the dress and hopefully in a smaller size! Involve others It can be hard getting into shape when you’re doing it alone, so get a buddy or group of people together. You can egg each other on and support one another and you’ll not want to let the other person down. Drink plenty of water Keeping hydrated is paramount if you have chosen to exercise. Also, sometimes we mistake thirst for hunger and we will eat when we actually don’t need to. Here’s a tip; if your mouth feels dry, then you are dehydrated, so drink some water! Think fit! Our mind is such an amazing thing that it cannot tell the different between what is right in front of us and what is in our mind. Get rid of any ‘fat thoughts’ and stop thinking about your wobbly bits. Start everyday with an affirmation. One of my favourite quotes of all time is by a very great man called Napoleon Hill. He says, ‘Whatever the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve’, so start believing and achieving!


Noth in Pay u g to Marc ntil h 20 13

30 MINUTE WORK-OUT IS ALL IT TAKES! It all worked-out for us at The National Fitness Awards! Winners of 'Ladies Only Gym of The Year.'

First Floor, 1-5 High Street, Market Place, Romford, Essex, RM1 1JU tel: 01708 749444

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Loves

Nordstrom Hair Chalk Saturate your hair in vibrant colour. The lightweight chalk applies easily and washes out in seconds with shampoo. Just gently apply to hair and set with hairspray! Genius!

Feel-Good Signs From Another Time Add a bit of winsome character to your walls with 13pumpkin’s range of hand-painted, vintage-style signs. Ryan and Marrianne Williams have pooled their passions for typography and décor to bring you these wordy creations, purposely distressed to look as if they’ve been plucked from a sweet small town somewhere. www.fab.com

54 | rmmagazine.co.uk

With hair chalk you can draw-on coloured streaks or dip-dyed ends for a fun afternoon look or a stylish night-out. Easy to use and perfect for those spontaneous moments, hair chalking is a commitmentfree way to add splashes of colour to your hair. www.shop.nordstrom.com


entertainment

SHOT GLASS ROULETTE

Jan Constantine Romany Make-Up Bag

circus of horrors at queens theatre

If you’re having a party and feel like giving a different ‘spin’ on the evening then why not try the Shot Glass Roulette Drinking Game. Based around a roulette wheel you simply spin the centre, add the ball, and drink from the numbered shot glass it lands on.

This unusual and beautiful bag can be used for makeup or even as a small clutch bag. The front is cream faux leather with the word Love on one corner in red with a large embossed brown faux leather flap.

First seen on our screens in 2011, the Circus of Horrors are back with a bang!

Each glass corresponds with two or three different numbers, so hard drinkers can keep refilling for a longer, more interesting game. www.argos.co.uk

The back of the bag is in cream with the word Love and the Romany heart in red. One end of the bag is tied with red Love ribbon and it can be fastened with a zip. An unusual bag to store special things! www.notonthehighstreet.com

On Sunday 13th January, they came to ‘Hornychurch” Queens Theatre with a new vampire vaudeville spectacular, featuring bizarre dare-devil circus acts, nudity and hilarious hospitality. Pin pointing a favourite moment from the show is a tough one; there were so many to choose from. From scaring the hell out of the audience by climbing over the seats from the back of the auditorium, to being in total awe watching the aerial silk dancers, you’ll also witness Hannibal Hellmurtos ‘floating ribs’ and be completely amazed by the skeleton street dancing! A must see show next time it’s in town. www.circusofhorrors.co.uk

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Unsigned:

Held by Horses Written by Rae Delanie Passfield

The Band Harriet Reynolds 20, Vocals Kyle Ginn 19, Guitar Will Smith 19, Guitar Liam Paylor 19, Bass Scott Dillon 18, Drums contact facebook.com/heldbyhorses Twitter @heldbyhorses www.heldbyhorses.co.uk 56 | rmmagazine.co.uk

The female fronted rockers have left Essex behind to take on the London music scene. This month they give us the lowdown on what it takes to be a fledgling band; what’s good,what’s tough and why it’s all worth it. In the Beginning Kyle: We started the band purely for our love of music, we had no worries about being unsigned. It all started out as a bit of fun, but it’s got us a lot further than we ever imagined. Harriet: It was our dream to be in a band, no matter how big or small. We wanted to do it and work hard on it simply to make music that makes people happy. Getting Heard Harriet: It’s tough to get heard, but social networking really helped. Twitter has definitely boosted our fanbase, even with the odd fan in America! Will: We have had PR campaigns on the new EP, and given out our music for free at gigs. That way we can keep people interested and listening to us...everyone loves free stuff! So Far Kyle: There are always ups and downs, but it’s the way you fight back when the going gets tough that really makes a band stronger. We support each other and have a huge passion for what we’re doing. Will: Money is a massive issue when you’re unsigned. Most of the time you don’t get paid for gigs and travel is expensive. It’s difficult, but worth it in the end. Liam: So far we have released two EP’s. Our most recent, In History, was recorded by Dan Lancaster (Lower Than Atlantis, Don Broco) and have played alongside bands such as Mallory Knox and Mystery Jets.

Essex Vs London Will: We decided to base ourselves in London, because four of us were going to Uni there. Kyle: In my opinion though, Essex is better for audiences because we can always guarantee there will be people there to see us. We played sold out show in Harlow that definitely gave us faith in the Essex music scene. Today Scott: Interest from small labels has encouraged all of us to put more into our song writing. We can definitely say that 2013 will be the year we bring out our best music yet. Liam: The future will be a positive one. We are dedicated, I know we will make this band something that people cannot ignore. We all have the same dream, to make a stamp on the scene, and with the support from our fans and management, I am sure we will do just that. Coming Up Held by Horses have a busy year ahead. New material is set for release in the coming months and a gig supporting ACODA on the 28th February, at The Peel in Kingston is confirmed. The band also have coheadlining tours lined up for spring and summer. EP In History is available to download now.


entertainment

Serve your Beauty

with some Heart!

Fai Bassett! This amazing fan had my lyrics tattooed on her LEG! I thought this deserved a huge shout out! What a legend! The lyrics are the first chorus line in ‘I Got Rhythm- a song I haven’t even put online yet… that’s a hardcore Leddy, right there! January blues are over, but it was still a pretty packed month! My charity single ‘Beauty with Heart’ for Teenage Cancer Trust in association with the Body Shop is out NOW! You can download this via www.fairsharemusic.com It has had a lot of celeb support including tweets of the music video (filmed in Weald Park, Essex) from Ant and Dec to Graham Coxon of Blur :) It is for such an amazing cause and it is an honour to be working with TCT this year. Bring on the Royal Albert Hall shows! I’m currently on the road with my band touring around the UK and performing songs from my new upcoming release, ‘The Crowds and Cocktails EP’, as well as some fan fav’s and tunes from my debut album. Singer/Songwriter Lee Broderick is touring with me at the moment and opening for me on each show. Check him out online, he is going to drop onto the UK scene very soon! I dragged him down from Liverpool for the best part of a month before we set off on tour- he needed to learn how to party the Essex way ;) so of course, we followed the yellow brick road into Romford haha!

Valentines Day I can’t help it… I’m a big soppy idiot around Valentines Day, I hope everyone has a nice dayincluding any singletons! If you are single, it’s time to get together with a mate and watch slasher films, or listen to heavy metal whilst, blaming commercialism for the entire day. My best friend Marisa and I did that one year... it works. haha 57


entertainment

TO P F I VE OFF I C E G AD G E T S

12 - Written by Charlotte Long -

BANANA STRESS RELIEVER MenKind, £4.99

Work stressing you out? Is your boss being a total jobs worth. Well what better way to mellow yourself out than a stress ball, but in banana form! The amount of times here at RM have squeezed bananas in stressful situations is ridiculous, and the outcome is frankly quite messy. The office floors of RM are no longer covered in squished banana remains thanks to this fruity stress reliever. Don’t go bananas, get squeezing.

I’M A TWAT

MenKind, £4.99

To be honest, it’s the little things in life that make us smile. And what better way to cheer yourself up than planting this mug in the work canteen and then seeing an unsuspecting co-worker innocently drinking their tea, not knowing that they are calling themselves a twat. It’s comedy gold at its finest (and even more enjoyable if it’s your boss). You’d be a mug not to buy this!

OSTRICH PILLOW

www.studiobananathings.com, £65.00

If you like to have little snoozes at work then this is the perfect gadget for you! It may look a tad silly, but who cares when you’re sleeping?! If you need an excuse to tell your boss that napping on the job is quite beneficial, then here’s a fun fact for you: Studies show that having a 30 minute power nap can increase your productivity by 30%! Those researchers must have been dreaming… 58 | rmmagazine.co.uk

BACK MASSAGER

34

5

MenKind, £11.99

What?! I can get a back massage whilst at work I hear you cry! Yes madness I know, but your dream could be a reality with this Lumbar Back Massager. Simply add 2x D batteries and lean back on this pillow to get rid of all of your tension, knots and aches that could be stopping you from working to your fullest potential. Genius!

JELLYFISH TANK Red5, £17.95

Want an office pet but don’t want the hassle of doing its dirty work, like cleaning, feeding or walking?! Then look no further. This mini jellyfish tank requires zero maintenance, yup you heard that correctly. Just add 3 x AA batteries and your pet is ready to go!


advertorial

Nadifi 100% Genuine Argan Oil RM Magazine were recently introduced to NADIFI Argan Oil, have you used it yet? Nadifi (Arabic for clean) Argan Oil combines the benefits of all the natural oils put together! It’s said to be a wonderful natural remedy for hair growth, strength, softness and luster and is brilliant for maintaining a healthy skin and hair. SKIN

Lightweight and easily absorbing oil is rich in natural gamma tocopherols (vitamin E) biological anti-oxidant and neutralizer for free radicals. It has 80% of fatty acids effective for healing scars and stretch marks tissue and as a protection against UV light. High level of Vitamin A helps to improve skin and hair elasticity.

mainly accompanies oily skin the Argan oil gives more control over this process of acne formation. It also reduces redness and inflammation caused by acne.

HAIR

Argan oil can change the look and feel of your hair. It restores elasticity, eliminates dryness and repairs damaged, dull-looking and chemical treated hair, prevent split ends.

Natural anti-aging and anti-wrinkle remedy.

High levels of antioxidants help to reduce signs of aging and prevent skin from dehydration.

Improves skin softness and elasticity.

The antioxidants prevent breakdown of two main skin proteins – elastin and collagen - responsible to keep stretch marks under control.

A “must” remedy to prevent formation of pregnancy or weight loss stretch marks.

Reduces visibility of existing scars, lessens their discoloration.

• •

Due to anti-inflammatory, anti-microbial and healing properties make Psoriasis, • Eczema, Acne and other skin diseases more tolerable. Protects skin from sun exposure, stress and pollution; repairs damaged skin cells and protein structures, effectively ceases skin irritation.

Argan oil is used to heal abrasions, wounds, and all kinds of burns, including sunburns. It protects skin from dryness and soothes itchiness.

It is suitable for all skin types and can hugely improve skin conditions. The oil does not contain cholesterol and leaves no residue.

Argan Oil regulates the work of sebum glands and acts as a neutralizer for over production of body oil. With its use the skin does not look or feel oily. As acne

Argan oil allows hydrating hair and protecting scalp from dandruff. It reduces scalp dryness and itchiness, keeps the scalp healthy, prevents hair loss and increases hair growth.

Protects frizzy hair against damage from heat appliances (blow dryers, flat irons, etc)

The oil easily penetrates into the hair shaft, restores hair shine and liveliness; promotes hair growth. Rub a small amount of Argan oil into the dry, damaged hair. For dandruff, dry scalp and hair loss, massage oil into the roots. Leave it for as long as you want, the oil does not give the hair a greasy look. For soft, silky and glossy hair repeat the procedure twice a week or more.

NAILS

Argan oil helps to keep nails strong and healthy, strengthens brittle nails. To strengthen weak or brittle nails, mix Argan oil and Lemon juice in equal parts and soak your nails with cuticles for 10 minutes. A small amount of Argan oil rubbed into your hands before bedtime will make your hands soft and younger looking.

Argan Oil is not just for women, it’s for men too! •

Argan Oil is great for moisturising the skin and can be used before shaving to help open your pores, it can also be used after shaving as a balm.

Quote ‘RM Rewards’ for the discounted price of

£10.99 (usually £12.99)

Plus for every bottle sold £1 will be donated to the SENSE charity! To find out more go to www.facebook.com/Nadifiarganoil or follow us www.twitter.com/Nadifi_arganoil or call Neil or Eylem on 07542 133175 59


entertainment

What’s On at the Queens Theatre? A shattering secret changes family life forever in this hilarious heartfelt comedy. On the morning of her son’s wedding, doting mother Betty is hiding in the attic to escape her unappreciative husband and the reality of an empty nest. Surrounded by happy memories and mementos, Betty relives her youth and a passionate love affair with a man she might have married.

Women in Business Over the past couple of months I have encouraged you to believe in yourself. Now I would like to introduce you to Maria Hayllar, owner of Heavenly Beauty Salon, winner of Best New Business at Havering Business Awards 2012. Maria’s success came at the end of a long hard journey that began in 2005 when her husband became ill and unable to work. Not wanting to go on benefits, Maria enrolled at Havering College, a mum and older student. It was hard work. Unable to find employment, she offered her services free to build her reputation. When she came to see me in October 2010, Maria had an area in a hair salon performing a range of beauty treatments. It soon became apparent she needed more space; however, this wasn’t available in her current location. Was this the time for Maria to start up her own business? It was a big decision but one that totally changed her life. After our meeting I arranged for her to meet with our business advisors who helped her write a business plan and guided her through the process of applying for a loan. I helped her in the process of renting premises and with the help of friends and family, Heavenly was born! The rest, as they say, is history. Now in her second year of trading and looking to purchase another property, Maria cannot believe how life has changed. Never in her wildest dreams did she think this would happen but I always believed in her spirit and passion.

If you enjoyed Calendar Girls or Shirley Valentine, you’ll love this poignant comedy by the writer of hit TV shows Fat Friends, Band of Gold, Coronation Street and more. £16 - £24.50 or £15 with a jump the Q Season Saver

FEBRUARY

1 Feb- 23 Feb A Passionate Woman 3 Feb Jimmy Jones 10 Feb SSAFA 18 Feb The Counterfeit Stones 24 Feb Future Faces 25 Feb Puppetry of the Penis 27 Feb Voice of the Heart

MARCH

1 Mar Tenors Unlimited 2 Mar Supersonic 70s Show 3 Mar Memories of the Musicals 5 Mar Davide Giovannai 6 Mar Queens Quiz Night 7 Mar Comedy Club 8 Mar - 30 March They’re Playing our Song 10 Mar Des O’Connor 18 - 19 Mar Drifters 25 Mar Los Endos 29 Mar Forever in Blue Jeans 31 Mar Best Friends Forever

APRIL

1 Apr - 2 Apr Moscow Ballet Coppelia 3 Apr Faryl Smith 4 Apr Hansel & Gretel 7 Apr The Crucible 10 - 12 Apr Hewitt PA 13 Apr The Commitments 14 Apr Best Comedy Songs 15 Apr SoundQube 16 Apr A Twist of Folk 17 Apr Fat Chance 18 Apr Comedy Club 19 Apr - 18 May Run for Your Wife 28 Apr Brentwood School Big Band 29 Apr Barry Cryer

MAY

19 Apr - 18 May Run for Your Wife 5 May First Feat 12 May London Swing Orchestra 13 May Barb Jungr

Is it your turn now? Think about it! Women in Business- 13th February 2013 FREE EVENT Yvonne Bendall 01708 432871

60 | rmmagazine.co.uk

For more info visit: www.queens-theatre.co.uk


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entertainment

Out of Area

Stuck for what to do this Valentines? Aim high and go dizzy with love, all be it very slowly, on the EDF London Eye. Sip champagne and take your time, this is the perfect opportunity to stare lovingly into your beautiful and dreamy, city of London.

Valentine’s Champagne and Canapés Experience THE EDF ENERGY LONDON EYE Take in the breathtaking views of London from 135 meters as you and your loved one enjoy a glass of Pommery Brut Royal Champagne and a selection of delicious canapés served by your host. The Champagne and Canapés Experiences includes: Priority boarding, 30 minutes on the London Eye, one glass of Pommery Brut Royal Champagne per person, a selection of canapés, including some Valentine’s additions – parmesan hearts, chocolate-dipped strawberries and pink champagne jelly. Times: 14th February at 18.00pm, 18.30pm, 19.00pm and 19.30pm, 15th and 16th February at 18.30pm Tickets from £54 www.visitlondon.com

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63


What’s on

12 February 2013 Cliffs Pavilion, Southend-on-Sea

6 february 2013 England v Brasil Football Match Five-times FIFA World Cup winners Brazil will kick-off The Football Association’s 150th anniversary year when they visit Wembley Stadium on Wednesday 6 February 2013. Club England Managing Director Adrian Bevington said, “We’re delighted Brazil will kick-off The FA’s 150th anniversary celebrations at Wembley. “2013 is a landmark year for The FA and an exciting England fixture programme in addition to Wembley hosting the UEFA Champions League Final will form a key part of the celebrations. As the most successful footballing nation with great players and supporters, it will be fantastic to launch this important year in English football’s history against such outstanding opponents as Brazil.” Tickets on sale now at www.thefa.com/tickets 64 | rmmagazine.co.uk

Brand new show, brand new jokes, same old Jimmy. “Gagging Order” promises to be a hilarious night out…let’s see shall we. The show will be packed with one-liners, stories and jokes. Some clever, some rude and a few totally unacceptable. Everybody’s welcome. Just leave your conscience, sense of common decency and moral compass at home and come on out for a laugh. Jimmy has sold over a million DVDs and hosted countless TV shows but live comedy is what he does best, come and see for yourself. Contains adult humour. Get your tickets now at www.southendtheatres.org.uk


entertainment

16 february 2013 Heart’s Wedding Show 2013

14 february 2013 Love, actually

23 february 2013 The J’s Hospice Bollywood Night

The UK’s longest-established regional wedding event returns to Essex this February.

To celebrate Valentines’ day and our fourth year of opening we will be exploring love throughout the ages, from literature to the silver screen, and from dance to poetry in a packed programme of events and activities for all ages, including craft activities for children. Full details will be available from our website. So whether you’d like to try new dance moves, watch a romantic movie, hear readings from famous 19th century novels or seal your love with our anniversary plaque workshop then come along and let us sweep you off your feet!

The highly popular Bollywood Night is returning to Chelmar Valley High School in aid of J’s Hospice. The night running between 19:30 and 23:00 will see traditional Indian music and dancing, an auction and raffle and the opportunity to receive Henna Tattooing.

Heart’s Wedding Show takes place at the Brentwood Centre, Doddinghurst Road, Brentwood, Essex CM15 9NN, on Saturday 16th and Sunday 17th February, 10am until 4pm on both days. Combining over a hundred exhibitors under one roof, the Heart Wedding Show offers everything the bride to be needs for their big day. For more information on the Heart Wedding Show, call Jane Ellis on 01245 524 519 or email jane.ellis@thisisglobal.com

Valentines Mansion & Gardens, Emerson Road, Ilford Essex IG1 4XA

There will be a mixture of beer, wine and soft drinks on offer with the £25 ticket fee including a 3 course meal + sides with tables seating up to 8 people. Be sure to get your hand on tickets quickly for a fantastic evening. For more info and tickets contact Denise Whiffin on 01245 475052.

www.wherecanwego.com

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entertainment

onth... m is th e c ffi o M R e th d n s, usually Things we’ve heard arou speak vacate our mouth lly ua us n’t uld wo we t and words tha that these deser ve to

ghtly We think brains decide to melt sli rating roar of laughter. ne ge r tea d an d lou Every now and then our a or us. Sharing is caring. dscape of bemused faces have a laugh, all be it at resulting in either a lan n ca e els e on ery ev st, very lea be shared so that, at the

..incontinence pads are in isle 5... This is Ed Sheeran with the horn... and this is Ed Sheeran without the horn!

I can sneeze through both!

I did that once with a disco ball!

It had a boob shelf and a bum shelf!

He looks like he needs one! 81x81=166.. ...obviously!

66 | rmmagazine.co.uk


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