I said so

SOCIETY LIFE: What’s one of your earliest memories you have of your Mom? GRACIE VEGA: Her goal was to always instill education in us. She said, “No one can take your education away from you.” She also didn’t believe in punishment. Instead, she had us work on multiplication tables so we could excel in math or write sentences to work on our grammar.

SL: What is something you thought about Motherhood that was totally wrong? GV: Growing up, there were subjects we didn’t talk about with my mom. Now as a mom, my son and I have open communication. There is no judgment and I want him to feel like he can always have an open dialogue with me.

SL: What’s something you always wanted to do but didn’t... and why didn’t you? GV: Go on a mission trip with my son—time just hasn’t allowed us to go yet.

SL: Was there something your Mom did when you were a kid that you swore you’d never do as a parent? GV: I grew up with five siblings and being the middle child, I was constantly compared to my other two sisters. This created a sense of competition that at times could be unhealthy and caused me to lose my identity. I wish she had embraced our unique qualities to strengthen our relationships.

SL: What did you think you wanted to be when you grew up? GV: I’ve always dreamed of helping people. My goal was to own a boutique that didn’t just sell nice clothes, but could be a place where people had a transformative experience—inside and out. I wanted to help others see their potential by helping them with their inner and outer appearance. In my dream, it was more than a boutique, it was a place where people could go to build their confidence.

SL: How have your notions of what it means to be a Mom changed over your lifetime? GV: When I lost my husband, I had to learn to assume the role of both parents which completely changed my perspective of what it means to be a mom. Now that my son is an adult, it’s about establishing a healthy friendship with him. I don’t want either of us to see any subject as taboo or fear being judged by each other. I want to create an environment where no subject is off the table with my son.

SL: What’s the best family vacation you’ve ever taken? GV: One year, my husband and I decided to take our son out of school early before break, but we wanted him to still have an educational experience, so we decided to take him to the Mayan Ruins in Cancun. This forced our family to get out of our comfort zone and visit places we normally would not go. We learned so much and Abrahim presented the project to his class when he returned to school. It was very educational and memorable.

SL: Is there a moment or event that radically changed the way you saw Motherhood? GV: The moment I lost my husband. We relied on him so much. He participated in school events, meetings and sports practices. I had to learn quickly to balance work and motherhood in a way that I had never experienced—and it forced me to make it work.

SL: When did you know you were ready to have kids? GV: I was 32 years old when I became a mom. As a couple we wanted to enjoy our time together, just the two of us, before we became parents. My husband was opening his restaurant and I was pursuing my career. We wanted to be sure we were ready financially and had stability to be able to devote our time to a newborn.

SL: What’s your favorite photo of your family or kids? GV: My sister-in-law captured a spontaneous moment where my husband and I are kissing our son—one on each cheek. His smile was priceless and so was the moment. I treasure that picture.

SL: What was the first year of motherhood like for you? GV: It was an adjustment, but the most beautiful time. I cherished every day!

SL: What do you want or wish most for your kids? GV: I want him to pursue his passions and fulfill his dreams. Education is big for me. The best gift I could give him is to guide him to the best education possible.