Publisher’s Message

Underoos and World Peace

Seriously, can there possibly be anything better than Underoos? When I was a kid they were all the rage, and I am happy to report that they are making a comeback. My three-year-old son, Harrison, has recently discovered what I have known most of my life: Underoos have secret powers. Since discovering this fact for himself, he pretty much wears nothing else. And, which Underoos you choose to wear says a lot about who you are (I’m surprised that a pop-psychology book was never written, “My Underoos, My Identity”). Harrison has chosen Spider-Man and loves to climb and jump off of just about everything in the house. Plus, he has learned how to shoot webs from his wrists (he makes an “L” shape sticking out his thumb and forefinger). But, most of all, he is busy looking after the safety of our neighbors. The interesting thing about Underoos is that there really are no bad guy Underoos. To clarify, from the Star Wars collection they have Darth Vader, but we all know he became a good guy after he finally took off his mask. And there was Boba Fett, who was a bounty hunter, but he was just so amazingly cool that the Underoos executives had no choice but to make an exception. In this season of politics and elections and propositions, I would like to propose mandatory adult Underoos for everyone. That’s right. And I want to be The Flash. Can you imagine how the world would change if we all wore Underoos? I mean, you cannot help but step up your game when you are a superhero under your street clothes. The world would be a better place as millions of Wonder Women and Supermen strode off to work each day answering to the higher calling of their Fruit of the Looms. We would be constantly looking out for each other and ethical decisions would be a snap. Imagine if Jeffrey Skilling at Enron had been wearing Green Lantern Underoos under his custom Italian suit? Obviously there have been some people who have been wearing theirs already. The guy who safely landed his commercial jet in the Hudson River comes to mind—rumor has it he was sporting Captain America ‘roos. Clearly, we, as a community, have some big issues ahead of us including one brewing in the waters off of Diablo Canyon [see “Seismic Testing” on page 44] as well as Proposition 37, which is bound to have an effect, one way or another locally [see “GMOs” on page 38], but I am completely confident (well, at least as confident as I can be because, as of this writing I have not yet received my government-issued Underoos) that, if we can call on our best selves, even if it means squeezing into colorful, old school “tighty-whities,” it will mean good things for all of us. I would like to take this opportunity to give a shout out to all of the people who had a hand in producing this issue of SLO LIFE Magazine. And, to our advertisers, thank you for making it all possible. Live the SLO Life!