Skirt September 2013

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free

september Augusta, Aiken & Columbia

E sca p e

th e

o rd i n a r y.

Are you true to you or do you hew to what others think of you? In the Land of Me, let independence be your key. Want a tattoo? Wear it proudly. It’s been a respectable tradition for thousands of years. High tops at 70? Game on! Dress

from the inside out, not from fashion magazines. Nobody remembers a copy cat. That gap between your two front teeth? It’s adorable, not a dental disaster.

Just ask Lauren Hutton. Don’t give away your power to politicians, preachers or potential lovers. Be as brave as you can, but don’t apologize for being shy or a lover of solitude. Not everyone needs the spotlight, but everyone can shed light. Your mistakes? They’re just rough drafts of the story of your life. Every day is the chance to write a new chapter in the Book of You, to discover your shadow, your self, the sweet spots of your soul. Cover copy by Nikki Hardin, art by Jackie Besteman

“Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.” Oscar Wilde




about skirt!

Publisher Nikki Hardin publisher@skirt.com National Art Director Caitilin McPhillips caitilin.mcphillips@skirt.com

2013

sept

National Editor Margaret Pilarski margaret.pilarski@skirt.com Market Manager (Augusta/Aiken/Columbia) Kate Cooper Metts kate.metts@skirt.com Contributing Editor Columbia Jenny Maxwell jennymaxwell@mindspring.com Contributing Editor Augusta/ Aiken Gracie Shepherd gracie.shepherd@skirt.com

skirt! is all about women... their work, play, families, creativity, style, health and wealth, bodies and souls. skirt! is an attitude...spirited, independent, outspoken,

Sales Executive Columbia/Aiken/North Augusta Libby Salvador libby.salvador@skirt.com Sales Executives Augusta Doressa Hawes doressa.hawes@augustamagazine.com Elizabeth Jones Sisson elizabeth.sisson@augustamagazine.com Maidi McMurtrie Thompson maidi.thompson@augustamagazine.com

serious, playful and irreverent, sometimes controversial, always passionate. sheMAIL skirt! 127-A 7th Street Augusta, GA 30901 Sales: 706.823.3702 Sales Toll-Free: 800.622.6358 FAX: 706.823.6061

The Land of Me Issue

www.skirt.com

Essays

Mary Porter Vann mary.vann@augustamagazine.com

On the Page, On Stage

Lauren Hopkins Karcz............................................................. 11 Graphic Designer

It’s a Boy! Tiny Tatoos

Michael Rushbrook Cher Wheeler Meaghan Pafford Photography Molly Harrell Sara Caldwell

Debra Larson............................................................................... 13 Women make more than 80% of all purchasing decisions.

Stacy Appel.................................................................................... 14 Go Me! Taking the Plunge

skirt.com skirt! is published monthly and distributed free throughout the greater Augusta/ Aiken/Columbia area. skirt! reserves the right to refuse to sell space for any advertisement the staff deems inappropriate for the publication. Unsolicited manuscripts must be accompanied by a self-addressed, stamped envelope. Letters to the editor are welcome, but may be edited due to space limitations. Press releases must be received by the 1st of the month for the following month’s issue. All content of this magazine, including without limitation the design, advertisements, art, photos and editorial content, as well as the selection, coordination and arrangement thereof, is Copyright © 2010, Morris Publishing Group, LLC. All Rights Reserved. No portion of this magazine may be copied or reprinted without the express written permission of the publisher. SKIRT!® is a registered trademark of Morris Publishing Group, LLC.

The First Big Break

Emily Rogan................................................................................... 32 Women spend almost 2 of every 3 healthcare dollars.

Features Women control 2/3 of the nation’s disposable income.

Women influence 80% of all car sales.

Letter from the Publisher.......................................................... 6

Letter from the Editor................................................................ 6

He’s So Original........................................................................... 26

Meet.................................................................................................... 24

Skirt of the Month..................................................................... 29

XOXOnikki.................................................................................... 34 4  september

2013 www.skirt.com


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2013

sept

The UniTed SkirTS of AmericA

The United Skirts of America was founded on the blood, sweat and estrogen of our

The Land of Me Issue

foremothers, who

All my life I’ve had two first names: the one I’ve used since birth (Nikki) and my legal

won us the freedom to

one (Lloyd). And to make it even more complicated, my middle name is Nickson, so

choose...to break The

Nikki is not even my “real” name. I used to think it was just an ongoing pain in the neck

Rules, to wear combat

because all the official documents you need to navigate the world and its bureaucracy—

boots or high heels, to

birth certificate, passport, bank account, social security card, driver’s license, mortgage,

run for office or run a Jackie Besteman

Jackie was raised in South Africa and Holland and settled in Toronto with her family after high school.

from The foUnder And nATionAl ediTor

marathon, to form our own rock groups instead of being groupies, to shatter Glass Ceilings

etc.—are all in my legal name. And of course when I need to deal with any of the associated entities, I’m always asked to put my husband on the line. It has caused me lifelong confusion, but I’ve never once considered legally changing my name to Nikki because I consider Lloyd to be my secret identity. And how many people get to have that? I’ve always felt as if there’s another life attached to that name that I never got to live. Lloyd would be a novelist or movie director, unafraid of water, willing to jump into

and Glass Slippers, to

the world without a lifejacket. She would travel the world with just a backpack, but it

Ontario College of Art and

shoot hoops instead

would always have a little black dress in case of emergencies. She would know how to

Design, she started making

of settling for hoop

ride a horse and drive a stick shift. She wouldn’t care what other people thought of her,

her colourful illustrations

skirts. The ones who

worry about the future or regret her past. I’ll always be Nikki out in the world, but I

for many publications and

came before us made

could use a few lessons from Lloyd.

has been doing so for over

it possible for our

20 years. Going digital 10

daughters to dream

After graduating from

years ago and recently learning Illustrator has opened up new doors and her style has evolved into what she calls “Urban Whimsy. ” In the

Nikki

nikki.hardin@skirt.com

bigger, to have the chance to grow up to be President and turn the Oval Office into the Ovary Office. In

last few years she has

the United Skirts of

started making patterns.

America, every day is

She is currently making

Independence Day!

from The ediTor

I’ve always thought receiving undivided attention is one of life’s great luxuries. This may be because I grew up in a noisy family with four children, where getting one-on-one time with a parent was treasured. I also credit my awesome piano teacher, Eugene Mauney, for nurturing this idea. As a goofy middle schooler, I thrived on private lessons where hard work earned me not a gold star but a turkey feather drawn in my music book. One day, Mr. Mauney assured me, I’d reach the lofty goal of having enough to make a turkey feather hat.

maps for vogue.com and has

Today, I do some one-on-one coaching for presentations and public speaking, and I have

also created Floria Earth

an idea of why Mr. Mauney had so much zest for his work. It’s great fun to help people

Girl. jackiebesteman.com

spot talents and do their best, rewarding to hear someone speak honestly about a problem, then be part of the solution. The women we profile this month help others, one-on-one. They’re making the luxury of undivided attention possible for someone else. But I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that they feel pretty darned enriched by the experience, too.

Jenny

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jennymaxwell@mindspring.com


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Illustration by The Pretty Paperie. theprettypaperie.com


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Photo by Jessica V Photography

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Season Schedule 2013-2014 Sawyer Brown

B. J. Thomas

Brenda Lee

Delbert McClinton Travis Tritt

Charlie Daniels Air Supply

Martyn McCoo & Billy Davis Jr.

Willie Nelson

Jerry Butler

Michael Bolton September 9/8 John, Janet and Jazz 9/12-15 South Carolina Elvis Festival 9/20 Exile 9/21 Air Supply 9/22 Jerry Butler October 10/2 David Osborne 10/4 Marilyn McCoo & Billy Davis Jr. 10/6 The Hitmen 10/10 The Grascals 10/13 Brenda Lee 10/15 An Evening with Mark Russell 10/18 Porgy and Bess A Concert Version 10/19 Robbert Earl Keen 10/20 Chris Mann In Concert 10/22 Willie Nelson 10/25 Sawyer Brown 10/26 Cowboy Movies 10/29 Chanticleer November 11/2 Menopause TheMusical 11/3 Oyster Roast, NOH Guild 11/7 Edwin McCain 11/8 B. J. Thomas 11/9 The Gibson Brothers 11/15 Phil Vasser 11/17 Jim Brickman The Love Tour 11/19 Ring of Fire December 12/3 The Charlie Daniels Band 12/5 Tony Kenny’s Christmastime in Ireland

12/6 12/7 12/8 12/12 12/13 12/17 12/20 12/31

Jingle All The Way 208th Army Band of Concord, NC Palmetto Mastersingers Artie Shaw Orchestra State Capella of Russia Branson Christmas Style Eddie Money New Year’s Eve Celebration

January 1/5 Dailey and Vincent 1/12 Godspell The Musical 1/17 Swingin’Medallions 1/18 Bo Bice 1/20 The Lennon Sisters 1/23 Smoky Joe’s Café 1/24 Hotel California-Tribute to the Eagles 1/29 1/30

Elixir of Love - Opera Travis Tritt

February 2/8 Richard Smith 2/9 Glenn Miller Orchestra 2/12 Krasnoyarsk Nat. Dance Co. of Siberia 2/14 2/15 2/16 2/22 2/25 2/28

Marina Lomazov Arlo Guthrie The Lettermen James Gregory - Comedy Man of La Mancha Delbert McClinton

March 3/2 Annie Sellick and the Hot Club of Nashville 3/3 Ozark Jubilee 3/4 Church Basement Ladies, A Mighty Fortress

3/6 3/8 3/9 3/11 3/15 3/16 3/19 3/20 3/22 3/23 3/24 3/25 3/28 3/29 3/30

Michael Bolton The Oak Ridge Boys Frankie Avalon Dublin’s Irish Cabaret Cowboy Movies Roslyn Kind Don’t Stop Believing, Journey Tribute Direct from Ireland - Celtic Nights Georgette Jones and Band The Kingston Trio A Variety of Great Music Steep Canyon Rangers A Far Cry Up Yonder, Comedy Guy Lombardo’s Royal Canadians

April 4/7 4/10 4/22 4/25 4/26 4/27 4/30

Golden Dragon Acrobats An Evening of Duo Piano Music Newberry College Opera Scenes Charlie Thomas’Drifters James Best - Comedy Doug and Bunny Williams C. B. Smith Show of Pigeon Forge

May 5/1 5/4 5/8 5/9 5/10 5/17

SC Storytelling Network The Raleigh Ringers Cinderella, Russian National Ballet Pawel Checinski – Pianist “Whispering”Bill Anderson Rick Alviti

June 6/14 Hen Party - Comedy 6/20-22 Kiss Me Kate - NCP

28  september www.skirt.com 1201 McKibben2013  Street Newberry, South Carolina Box Office: (803)276-6264 www.newberryoperahouse.com


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Skirt of the Month

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“You suck the fun out of everything.” Emily Rogan

Jump, Emily, just jump!” My brother Josh and my friends were screaming down below. I stood on a wooden platform, 15 feet above a pond of 38-degree water. I’d already had a taste of that icy water in the obstacle before, “The Ball Shrinker,” where I slowly inched my way across a fire hose submerged and stretched underwater, holding onto a rope above my head, with at least 20 other people swaying and struggling to keep their balance at the same time. I was really cold, my heart was racing, and there was no way, no way, I was going back in again. Except I had to. This was Tough Mudder, New England—not Wimpy Mudder. My team was waiting for me to finish this obstacle, “Walk the Plank,” so we could move on to the next. I’d already wasted precious minutes stalling. I turned to the young woman next to me, easily 20 years my junior and said, “Look, I’m twice your age. If I jump, will you?” She agreed and with one giant inhalation, I leaped. (She actually climbed down instead.) My body sliced through the arctic water. For a panicked moment, I thought that my heart had actually stopped. Then I couldn’t feel my legs. My head surfaced, and I started swimming with my frozen limbs as fast as I could to the edge. I scrambled up the slanted wooden ramp and joined my team as we ran through the trail. Thank god the sun was shining, because my feet were numb and felt like heavy bricks. I couldn’t stop shivering. What was I doing, the day before Mother’s Day, in Mount Snow, Vermont, running 10 miles up and down 13,000 feet of elevation, complete with 29 military-style obstacles?

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I am a runner. Training for a half or full marathon involves hard work but not much risk. Skydiving, bungee jumping, scaling Mount Everest—not on my bucket list. Not even close. I’m a 46-year-old mother of two, whose most recent brush with death was riding the Rip Ride Rockit at Universal Studios theme park. I’ve reluctantly climbed mountains and canyons in Utah and ridden horses up narrow paths in the middle of nowhere in Wyoming until my derrière was covered with saddle sores. But really, my idea of a good time is dinner out with my husband and a nice bottle of Barolo. Yet for Tough Mudder, I had to willingly sign a death waiver. That’s right—a death waiver. The average age of participants is 29; just 20% of the entrants are women. Still, there I was, alongside my 50-year-old brother and two 40-something friends, geared up and ready to go. It started innocently enough. A few months after my brother and I ran the Philadelphia Marathon, I found a fun, obstacle-style 5K for us to try and e-mailed him the link. “That’s for weenies!” he fired back, and sent me to the Tough Mudder site. How bad could it be? I asked myself. They probably hype it up and make it seem worse than it really is. Not knowing exactly how to prepare, I ramped up my strength training and started running hills and trails more frequently. I was still coasting from my marathon experience months before and feeling a little invincible. Dangerous? Nah, I wasn’t worried. The danger factor kicked in when we were on our bellies, crawling through two horizontal drainpipes partially filled with water, rocks and mud. In the “Boa Constrictor,” there was a person directly in front of you and one right behind. And there was just enough water to make you feel like you could


Taking The Plunge

drown. Not for the faint-hearted or claustrophobic, you could only move as fast as the person ahead. As I tried to stay calm, a memory of myself as a fearless little girl in pigtails and Chuck Taylors came flooding in. The youngest of three and the only daughter, I was a true tomboy, the first girl in my grade to wear Levi jeans instead of dresses to school. I had my share of scrapes on the playground and wasn’t afraid to stand up to the bullies who threatened my friends or me. I preferred playing with boys over girls, running hard and fast in the woods behind our house, wrestling on our front lawns. I played in mud on rainy days. I loved bugs. I was tough. Moments later, I emerged from the pipe intact and ready to move on. When we arrived at “Funky Monkey,” a monkey bars obstacle, I was exhausted. We had to pull ourselves across the bars that went up and down over yet another body of freezing water. Some of the rungs were greased to make a fall inevitable. My brother made it almost to the end when he lost his grip and fell in. Our friends both dropped after several rungs. I stood at the beginning, trying to muster the courage to go across. Some people were walking around; others climbed on top. Finally I went, hand over hand, rung after rung. At some point, I realized that I was more than halfway done and felt surprisingly strong. I was aware of cheering and clapping in the background, but didn’t realize it was for me. I kept going, my eyes focused ahead, and suddenly, I was on solid ground. People were shouting for me and giving me high fives. This wasn’t the first time I’d accomplished something challenging and potentially scary. I spent my junior year of college in Seville, Spain. To completely immerse myself in the language and culture, I bought a round-trip bus ticket to the Pueblos Blancos, several small villages deep in Andalucia’s hills, where no one, no one, spoke English. For four days I traveled alone from village to village, speaking only Spanish, eating, drinking and dancing through the nights with the townspeople. This was 1985. There were no cell phones then, no Internet. My mother had no idea where I was or how to get in touch with me. I could have simply disappeared. But I wasn’t afraid for one moment. In fact, I felt pure, unadulterated joy during those days of solitude and immersion. Not unlike the way I felt when my feet touched ground after the Funky Monkey. How did I lose sight of that adventurous girl? When I became a mother, I experienced the kind of anxiety and fear that only other mothers can understand. Suddenly, cars barreled down on us at every turn, strangers lurked to steal my babies from their strollers as they slept, lead paint and other toxins threatened to render them brain damaged. In my attempts to maintain a sense of order and keep my children safe, I became rigid, controlling and well, not very fun to be around. I worried about having that extra glass of wine, of speaking too loudly in public, of drawing attention to myself. I worried about everything. As my children grew, I realized they noticed these qualities about me and I didn’t like it. “Mom is so serious; she never laughs at anything.” “Mom’s too afraid—she won’t try that!” In fact, a friend dubbed me “the fun sponge” because as my son once said, “You suck the fun out of everything.” And then came Tough Mudder. Five hours of pain, fear, laughter, tears, constant icy wetness, and maybe worst of all, the unknown. We scrambled under barbed wire, scaled a man-made glacier, climbed rope walls, boosted each other over wood walls and ran up curved, slippery walls. We trudged up and down hills with logs on our shoulders. We waded through garbage dumpsters filled with ice cubes and dyed water and pits of vinegar and maple syrup. We got blasted with torrents of frigid water from a fire hose while running “The Gauntlet” uphill. We ran through live electrical wires. And always, everywhere, there was all that mud. We didn’t skip a single obstacle. Not one. I’m not foolish enough to believe that this experience will stop me from worrying. Nor do I have any lofty goals to climb Kilimanjaro or swim across the English Channel. But I did something very few people would even try. Tough Mudder reminded me of what I had forgotten about myself. I am a strong, brave and determined woman. I can take a risk without the world falling down around me, while enjoying myself just a little bit. Somewhere inside of me, the little girl with unruly braids and the college student discovering a foreign land nodded their heads in approval. Emily Rogan is a New York-based freelance writer who writes about health & wellness, food and education. Her work has appeared in Woman’s Day, Cooking Light, Newsday and several other publications. She’s a contributor to the anthology, Fits, Starts & Matters of the Heart and her essay about the cancellation of the New York City Marathon was published in the Huffington Post.

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2013

sept

xoxonikki If I had an ideal birthday pinata, it would contain sea salt caramels, dangly rhinestone e a r r i n g s , Pentel Needle Point pens, temporary tattoos, N Y C s u b w a y c a r d s , c o n d o m s (for optimism), Amazon gift cards, OPI nail polish, Forever stamps, GUM Soft-Picks and fortune cookies with good forecasts for the future.

W h a t ’s k e e p i n g m e a w a k e a t n i g h t : Looking forward to:

Thick September magazines Using my purple Cambridge school satchel My birthday in the mountains New Moleskine notebooks for fall Postcard exchange with an online friend I am jealous of:

who Peopleally King S own aenedict B ing. paint

crashinglybeautiful.tumblr.com Where to spend my birthday The Tudors, again! How to afford a lap pool Making friends with pool owners Going blonder How to fold fitted sheets Was that a palmetto bug?! Fear of failure The last CD by The Civil Wars

W h a t ’s o n m y i Pa d :

W h a t ’s o n m y m i n d :

I love Danielle LaPorte. Granted, she’s a self-help guru—but with a twist of lemon and a splash of wry. I start reading and think, “Oh no, another ‘be happy/love yourself/Stuart Smalley affirmation,” but then she takes me to an unexpected place. One I recognize from my own mind but was reluctant to voice. Like why networking is a waste of time. Her “White Hot Truths” often set me on fire.

Identifying as a feminist opens me up to ridicule, condescension and hate mail. But I can’t sit back and say, “I’m a feminist…but” and give a bunch of excuses that boil down to “I don’t want people to dislike me.” How can I know that the SC state senate has only one woman and not be a feminist? To be otherwise is to accept less-than.

Note to self:

THE BEST USE OF

$8.00

sallybenedict.com

“September is the new January.”

Jergens Natural Glow Moisturizer

Must haves this month:

– Gretchen Rubin Start over!

Salt Water sandals

Venessa Arizaga Piñata Bracelet

The NutriBullet

Real bread

Nikki Hardin is the founder of skirt! Magazine and the co-founder of Project XX (projectxxsc.com). She blogs at fridaville.com. 34  september

2013  www.skirt.com



CHANTECAILLE

NARS

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ART OF SHAVING

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