the back pew • doug brook
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38 Southern Jewish Life • May 2015
By any other name Judaism has a long history of name changes. Since early in the Torah, numerous names have been changed to add a piece of the Big G to certain special people’s monikers. Abram became Abraham, Sarai became Sarah. Jacob became Israel. Hoshea became Joshua. Zimmerman became Dylan. Following in that divine tradition, but with decidedly less divine influence, this column is changing its name. It is not changing to protect the innocent — that ship sailed long ago for this columnist as well as for both of you readers, by virtue of prolonged exposure. So, what is the significance of The Back Pew? At most synagogue services, the front row is empty. Sometimes the family for a bar or bat mitzvah is there, but that is either by instruction or because they don’t know better. A rabbi with whom I worked in Pittsburgh often explained this orchestra-seat emptiness by stating that the front row is reserved for the righteous and the pure of heart. After hearing that, I acted on my newfound obligation and immediately started to sit in the back row at all services, unless compelled by family. It’s just as well because it’s harder for a rabbi to WHAT’S IN hear sermon heckling from back there. Similarly, this column has been featured A NAME on the back page of the magazine, though (CHANGE)? technically it is the front of the magazine for any Hebrew readers who out of habit approach each issue from right to left. As always, this space is still for rant. Both of you will continue to receive the same quality of humor as before, for which the editorial staff insisted on including this apology. So fear not, while you gather your remaining Passover marshmallows for the Lag b’Omer bonfire so you can make S’mor-a Matzah. Speaking of the Lag chag, too little in Jewish humor is said about the Omer. That gap will not be filled by the following. Why do we count the Omer each year? For the same theological reason as many other things we do: Because the Torah says so. However, while the original verse is widely published in Leviticus, the recently discovered Mishnah tractate Bava Gump reveals an additional excerpt that provides still more detail as to the Omer counting process. From the Book of Omerments, Chapter Four, Verses 16 through 20: “Thou must count to forty-nine. Forty-nine shall be the number of the counting, and the number of the counting shall be forty-nine. “Fifty shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count forty-eight, excepting that thou then proceedeth to forty-nine. “Fifty-one is right out.” continued on previous page