Chapter Eight
101
His heartbeat will certainly stop. So beware, don’t tell Him. Tell Him a little today, a little tomorrow, a little the next day, in a gradual way so that He will be able to tolerate it.” Upon seeing and hearing all of this, Uddhava became astonished. He thought, “Their prema is such a beautiful sentiment and such an elevated bhåva! Before today I have never even heard of such a thing. It seems that K®ß√a has sent me here to Vraja to learn this, and in reality K®ß√a recently said to me, “What is prema? This you should understand.” In real love one will not want any inconvenience or difficulty whatsoever to come to his lover. Prema which is devoid of this attribute is not real prema. The prema of today that we see with all these weddings taking place—when the wife leaves the husband and falls in love with someone else, the husband shoots her dead and then kills himself also. Is there any prema in this? In the gopîs’ prema there is not even the slightest scent of selfishness. “If I die, it is nothing. My only concern is that no unhappiness comes to him.” This is pure prema. So prema for K®ß√a should come from the åtmå; prema cannot take place within the body. In this world there is no such thing as prema or love. So Uddhava returned to K®ß√a and for one or two days he didn’t say anything. Then each time they met he told K®ß√a a little more, and upon hearing it K®ß√a became unsteady. This is real prema. Even in the stage of sådhana we should be unselfish. If we reach the point where we are doing bhajana without any selfish desires, then prema will come. Prema is also bhagavat-svarüpa, a transcendental entity endowed with free will, and in our present condition it will not enter our hearts because we would not appreciate its true value. So when no type of selfishness remains within us, then we will be practicing uttamå-bhakti. At that time we will be engaged in the sådhana of uttamåbhakti, then eventually bhåva will come, and finally prema will come. In our present condition, being situated near K®ß√a and rendering direct service to Him is something that is very far away from us. We can’t even imagine what is real unselfishness; we are unable to understand it. But we are doing sådhana so