SBI Magazine | Issue 101

Page 1

stylish | bold | informative

RUPAUL’S DRAG RACE FINALE HRC DINNER TONY MORAN

RIL 28 01 | AP 1 E U S IS

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E H R O O TEL HOST M T R A E S TH

Canine Fashion for a Cause THE S 2010 POKESD F O E OGGIE SEARCH FOR THE FURRY FAC

Featuring the adorable adoptables from PAWS Atlanta

THURSDAY MAY 6 FROM 7-10 THE ARTMORE HOTEL LOCATED AT 1302 WEST PEACHTREE STREET NW ATLANTA, GA 30309 • 404-201-7544

Fashions from Dixie Dogs • Home made doggie treats from Taj Ma-Hound Enjoy specialty cocktails like Blood Hound Mary and the Milkbone Margarita A portion of all proceeds will benefit PAWS Atlanta www.pawsatlanta.org | RSVP to tia@k101agency.com by 5/4


1119 Logan Circle • Atlanta • 30318 404-873-6307 Monday - Friday • 8am - 5pm Saturday • 10am - 2pm Metrotainment Bakery Illustrator 6 eps file

metrobakery.com

Proudly supporting the community since 1991. Metrotainment Cafes Illustrator 6 eps file

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Garrisons Broiler & Tap Illustrator 6 eps file

metrocafes.com


CONTENTS 006 Letter from Publisher/Editer 008 COVER: Beginnings & Endings 018 FEATURE: 23rd Annual HRC Dinner 022 MUSIC: Tony Moran 014 015 016 A020

Nightlife Directory BE THERE: City Map BE THERE: Calendar of Events

BE THERE:

Burkharts 025 PHOTOBOOTH: Blake’s On The Park 029 PHOTOBOOTH: Heretic Thursdays PHOTOBOOTH:

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DO THIS:

Drink of The Week

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BEST OF:

Social Media

Andy Cohen, HRC’s National Visibility Award Recipient

sbi magazine atlanta publisher managing editor creative director marketing director

JASON SNEAD SUNNI EPSTEIN MARGARET GRAFT TIFFANY UNGER RAMBUSCH

APRIL 28, 2010 | ISSUE 101 jsnead@sbimagazine.com sepstein@sbimagazine.com mgraft@sbimagazine.com trambusch@sbimagazine.com

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: CAESAR MORILLO // CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHY: DAN BOYLE *DISCLAIMER* below is a bunch of legal jargon that no one really cares to read, but our attornies tell us to put in. enjoy if you care to read it, our articles are more entertaining..

Opinions expressed by advertisers, columnists, and feature writers, or other contributors are not necessarily the opinions of SBI Magazine, Epstein Snead Publications LLC or its staff. All advertisements, sponsored advertorial features, pictures, text and illustrations, are published with the understanding that the advertisers are fully authorized and have secured proper written consent for use thereof. SBI Magazine and Epstein Snead Publications LLC shall not be held responsible for any errors, loss or expense, or liabilities, on advertisements accepted after the weekly deadline. Publication of the name, photograph of any person, or advertisement, contained in this issue, is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such person, advertiser, or organization. Partial or complete reproduction of any advertisement, news article, feature, or photograph from SBI Magazine or sbimagazine.com is strictly prohibited. All rights reserved.

contact info & hours sbi magazine po box 54847 atlanta, ga 30308 404.829.2627 main 404.487.8907 fax www.sbimagazine.com Monday-Friday: 9am-5pm


R

E PUBLISH M O R F LETTER

(Here’s my Oprah/Gayle moment…don’t f*$k it up!) Hello Atlanta, In your hands is the inaugural issue of sbi Magazine. Now, if I were to put myself in your shoes, the first thing I would do is thumb through the pages and see what it’s all about. We aim to always keep up with the latest styles, always be a loud and bold voice in our community and always do our best to keep you informed on the city’s happenings and point you to the businesses that support you and I. In our BE THERE sections, you will find the up-to-date “hotspots” and their events. In our DO THIS sections, we will feature new recipes, mixology and even unique date-night suggestions. In our PHOTOBOOTH pages, you will find the hottest people shot out around town. In our BEST OF pages are this week’s best things ranging from laughable social media quotes to recession friendly specials at neighborhood restaurants. I grew up just outside the perimeter and began coming to the city when I was just 15 to Innovox and Outwrite. It was like coming to the Emerald City for me at the time. At AIDS Walk 2004, I volunteered to work and I had a personal conversation with Mayor Franklin. She really encouraged me to continue being involved with our community and volunteering for worthy causes. In 2006, I started producing and promoting nightlife events. Throughout the productions, I learned a lot from people heavily involved with the community from Brad Williams to Bubba D’Licious and countless others the importance of giving back. I began working with the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force their annual Winter Party in Miami and worked with local personalities to sponsor YouthPride events that give the LGBT Youth in Atlanta a safe place to socialize. I am continuing the community involvement at SBI and we are already working with local charities in various ways to help these organizations continue the vital work they are doing in Atlanta. We hope you stay involved with us by supporting the businesses that support you and writing to let us know your feedback. Enjoy! Jason Snead Publisher 6

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COVER

GS BEGINNINGS&EJasNonDSneIN ad

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uPaul embodies the SBI Magazine mantra, making the Atlanta-native the perfect pick for our inaugural cover. She demonstrates style, boldness and gives informative advice to aspiring drag starlets week-after-week on Logo’s second season of RuPaul’s Drag Race. It is no surprise that the show won the 21st Annual Glaad Media Award for Outstanding Reality Series as season two proves to be even more intense than the first with harder challenges and cutthroat judges’ critique. Each week the girls are given different challenges that extend from making outfits out of curtains to selling cherry pies on the streets of L.A. Every week the girls let out their inner bitch with their eye rolls, finger snaps and catty commentary about their fellow queens. The catfights are definitely entertaining, but the individual styles and creativity the queens bring to the challenges make up most of the show. Each week guest judges like Kathy Griffin, Tanya Tucker, and Henry Rollins join Merle Ginsberg, Santino Rice and Rupaul herself to critique the fashions 8

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created by the racers. The gentlemen cooled their engines – and the best woman won. Tyra Sanchez clawed her way to the title of America’s Next Drag Superstar and won the crown during the finale of the second season of RuPaul’s Drag Race. Just back from filming the reunion show, we caught up with the two Atlanta queens in this year’s competition, Nicole Paige Brooks and Sonique:

Q: How were you picked for RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 2? NPB: I tried out the

first season. A lot of my friends really pushed me to do it and I almost got on, so when the next season started casting, I did it again. SONIQUE: I sent in a video like everyone else. I was just being myself, nothing more nothing less, I guess they liked me.

Q: Do you think the other girls selected deserved to be there? NPB: At first, I was

surprised at some of the girls that made it. After being there with them I started to see why the


show would pick them. Each one of us showed a different niche in the drag community. SONIQUE: I think all of the girls are great so, yes they deserved to be there.

Q: When did you start doing drag and how has your career changed since being in Atlanta? NPB: I started

doing drag February 22,1995 in Oklahoma City. When I moved to Atlanta, Backstreet was open and pouring 24/7. It was the second place in Atlanta I performed and I started working there and have been doing Drag here successfully every since. SONIQUE: I started doing drag in Athens a few years ago. The local drag queens were stand-offish to me and rarely allowed me to work, so the drag Kings took me in and the rest is history. Moving to Atlanta was the best career move I ever made. I have always had a job and have worked with very many legendary queens like Ashley Kruiz, Nieshia Dupree, Raquel Lord just to name a few. There are a few people in Atlanta I want to thank for giving me a chance in the beginning, Princess Charles, Mary Edith Pitts, Shawnna Brooks, and Nicole Paige Brooks. They will always have a special place in my heart and I couldn’t thank them enough.

Q: What was a typical day like while filming? NPB: It went something like this.

8am we had to be ready to leave the hotel; sometimes as a girl, sometimes as a boy. Go to set: may it be a club or the side of the road. Do the challenge, go to next set, get the next challenge, have lunch. Start to get ready for the next challenge. Do one-on-one interviews, work on the challenge, eat dinner, rehearsal for the next day, end of day interview. Go back to the hotel at 11ish, sometimes later. REPEAT SONIQUE: We would have to be up early around 6:30am. Be on set with our mic on and ready to film by 8am. There was a lot of hurry-up and wait moments, which drove us

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crazy. Sometimes we wouldn’t leave filming until 11pm and have to get up and do it all over again the next day. I enjoyed people telling me what to do though. I didn’t have to think too much; it was like a vacation to me. I loved it.

Q: Who was your favorite celebrity judge? NPB: Dita Von Teese SONIQUE: I would have to say Dita Von Teese, and Kim Coles they are the only two judges that actually came up to me while no cameras were on to talk to me. It made my day.

Q: What did you learn from the experience? NPB: I worry a lot about the

people around me, to the point I was not sleeping well at night. We could not call e-mail or talk to anyone outside of the show. When I got home everyone was just fine, so mostly I learned not to worry so much. SONIQUE: Know who you are and deliver that at all times. You can’t go wrong with that.

Q: Are the other girls correctly portrayed?

NPB: Yes if you didn’t say, it they can’t play it. Do I think they played things up? Yes it’s Television. SONIQUE: I think we all had “our moments” and most of the show is based on those moments. They have so much footage of us, but ultimately they used what would make great TV. So to answer the question, we all got along great, most of us, and all the girls were nice to me.

Q: Besides yourself, who was your favorite on the show? NPB: Pandora Boxx and I am super proud of Jujubee

SONIQUE: I love Morgan. She is my best-friend now and I knew N.P.B. & Pandora before filming and I loved them from the start, I really didn’t get a chance to get to know people while filming, but after the show I have gotten closer to Jujubee, Shangela, Tatianna, Raven, and Sahara.

Q: Sonique, Was it hard having Nicole leave? SONIQUE: It was sad to see Nicole go

so soon, because I knew she was one of the 10

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stronger and more experienced girls, it is never easy to see your friend go.

Q: How has the show helped and hurt and how has the show changed your career? NPB: This has been nothing

but a positive experience and I have loved every minute of it. I travel a lot now that is one of the biggest things that has changed. I am enjoying seeing all the different places and all the different drag. SONIQUE: The show has only helped me. I have learned so much about myself and the people around me. I have had to keep to myself in my personal life and work harder. It’s always great to be recognized for being on TV unless it’s Cops, haha, but I love my life and I’m in a happy place in my life and I can see clear, love stronger, and work as much or as little as I choose. I’m very grateful and know that I’m blessed God has been good to me. I have noticed the people around me have changed some for the better, others not so much, but at the end of the day I feel loved and wanted, I feel great!

Q: We define our magazine as Stylish, Bold and Informative. How would you define yourself in three words and what you want people take away about you from your TV debut?

NPB: Entertaining, Talented, and Smart SONIQUE: Honest, Caring, and Friendly. I can only do Sonique, I can’t be everybody else. I hope people can be happy for me and to know that I’m proud of me no matter what, I also want everyone to love a lot more and hate a lot less life is way too short to dwell on the small stuff.

Q: Where are you performing now in Atlanta? NPB: Monday: Blake’s Wednesday : Jungle for Fantasy Girls Thursday : Blake’s with Shawnna Brooks Friday: LeBuzz or out-of-town Saturday: LeBuzz SONIQUE: Monday:Blake’s 11pm Tuesday: Shout 11pm Wednesday Jungle 10PM Thursday: Heretic 11PM I travel on the weekends. For information about RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 2, visit LogoTV.com and pick-up RuPaul’s new book, Workin’ It!: RuPaul’s Guide to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Style at Outwrite Bookstore. Nicole Paige Brooks: nicolepaigebrooks.com Sonique: twitter.com/SoniqueATL

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BE THERE

NIGHTLIFE DIRECTORY

1. Amsterdam Cafe

502 Amsterdam Avenue 404.892.2227 www.myspace.com/amsterdamatlanta

2. Bellissima

500-B Amsterdam Avenue 404.917.0220 www.myspace.com/bellissima_lounge

3. Blake’s On The Park 227 10th Street NE 404.892.5786 blakesonthepark.com

4. BJ Roosters

2545 Cheshire Bridge Road 404.634.5895 bjroostersatl.com

5. Brushstrokes

1510 Piedmont Avenue 404.876.6567 brushstrokesatlanta.com

6. Bulldogs

893 Peachtree Street 404.872.3025

7. Burkhart’s

1492-F Piedmont Road 404.872.4403 burkharts.com

8. Chaparral

12. Eros

2219 Faulkner Road 404.287.4482

13. FLEX Baths 76 4th Street NW 404.815.0456 flexbaths.com

14. Felix’s

1510-G Piedmont Avenue NE 404.249-7899

15. Friends on Ponce

25. Model-T

699 Ponce De Leon Avenue 404.872.2209

27. Outwrite Bookstore

17. Heretic

29. Poster Hut

219 10th Street NE 404.872.8012 gilbertscafe.com 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road 404.325.3061 hereticatlanta.com

18. HOBNOB Tavern 1551 Piedmont Avenue 404.968.2288 hobnobatlanta.com

19. Joe’s on Juniper

20. Jungle

2115 Faulkner Road 404.844.8800 jungleclubatlanta.com

10. The Eagle

21. LeBuzz

11. Einstein’s

22. Las Margaritas

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1492 Piedmont Road 404.228.4372 mixxatlanta.com

16. Gilbert’s

9. Club Europe (Lion’s Den)

077 Juniper Street NE 404.876.7925 einsteinsatlanta.com

24. Mixx

26. My Sister’s Room

2715 Buford Highway 678.886.3205

506 Ponce De Leon Avenue 404.873.2453 atlantaeagle.com

1287 Glenwood Avenue 404.624.4411 marysatlanta.com

756 Ponce De Leon Avenue 404.817.3820 friendsonponce.com

1019 Juniper Street NE 404.875.6634 joesatlanta.com

4001 Presidential Parkway 770.452.1240 thelionsdenatlanta.com

23. Mary’s

585 Franklin Road Marietta, GA 770.424.1337 thenewlebuzz.com 1842 Cheshire Bridge Road 404.873.4464 lasmargaritasatlanta.com

1271 Glenwood Avenue SE 678.705.4585 991 Piedmont Avenue 404.607.0082 outwritebooks.com

2175 Cheshire Bridge Road 404.633.7491

30. Swinging Richards 1400 Northside Drive 404.352.0532 swingingrichards.com

31. 3 Legged Cowboy 951 Monroe Drive 404.876.0001 3leggedcowboy.com

32. Tripps

1951 Piedmont Circle 404.724.0067

33. Woof’s Sports Bar 2425 Piedmont Road 404.869.9422 woofsatlanta.com


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BE THERE

EVENTS

wed 4.28 Texas Hold ‘Em Poker @ Bellissima 7-11pm Fantasy Girls | RuPaul’s Drag Race @ Jungle 9pm-12am Crazy Bitch Bingo @ Joe’s 8-10pm Honey Pot @ Mary’s 8pm Trivia @ Woofs 8-11:30pm Comedy Video Night @ Mixx 9pm-12am Girls On Top female DJs @ The Glenn 9pm Punk Rock Night @ the Eagle 9pm Dress Code Party @ Heretic 10pm Spotlight Karaoke @ My Sisters’ Room 10pm Karaoke Idol w/ Shavonna B. Brooks @ Burkhart’s 11pm Rated R Burlesque show with Lady Shabazz @ Blake’s 11pm

thu 4.29 Thursday Nights @ the High 5-8pm Texas Hold’em Poker & the Shawnna Factor @ Blake’s 7pm-12am Crazy Bitch Bingo @ Las Margaritas 7:30-9:30pm Ladies Night @ LeBuzz 8pm Etcetera with DJ Vicki Powell @ Aurum 9pm Indulge @ the W Midtown 9pm-12am Net Work with Traxx Atlanta @ Obsessions 10pm Papi’s Cafe Con Leche Latin Tribal House @ The Heretic 10pm Princess Charles’ Fashionistas @ Burkharts 11:30pm

fri 4.30 Friday Happy Hour @ Bellissima 6-9pm Fiona Zedde’s “Kisses After Midnight” Party @ Charis 7-8:30pm Family Poker Night @ Model T 8:30-11:30pm Lindsey Hinkle live @ Bellissima 9-11pm Friday Night Live with Traxx @ Club Miami 10pm Fun Friday @ Jungle 10pm Primal Urges @ the Heretic 10pm Fierce Fridays @ LeBuzz 11pm Kitty LeClaw’s Meow Mix @ Blake’s 11pm-12am 2-4-1 VIP @ Swinging Richards 6:30pm The Mary Edith Pitts Show @ Burkhart’s 11:30pm

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sat 5.1 Purple Dress Run with Atlanta Bucks Rugby 1-6pm *(See Page 18) Atlanta HRC Gala Dinner & Silent Auction 5:30-9:30pm Hot Mess! party @ Mary’s 9pm Girl Kraze Saturdays @ My Sisters’ Room 10-11pm Same Sex Saturdays @ Club 714 10pm *(See Page 22) DJ Tony Moran | Sinister Saturdays @ Heretic 10pm Jealouse’s Daring Divas @ Blake’s 11pm-12am Saturday Night Fever @ LeBuzz 11pm The Mary Edith Pitts Show @ Burkhart’s 11:30pm

sun 5.2

Papi’s Brunch @ Las Margaritas 11am-4pm The Atlanta Opera presents Mozart’s The Magic Flute 3-5pm Texas Holdem Poker @ Friends On Ponce 4-7pm The Armorettes @ Blake’s 8-10pm Mary Edith Pitts’ Sunday Spectacular @ Burkhart’s 9pm-12am

mon 5.3 Margarita Mondays @ Le Buzz Crazy Bitch Karaoke @ Las Margaritas 7:30-9:30pm Texas Hold’em @ Woofs 7:30-10pm Dragamaki @ Nickiemoto’s 8:30-10:30pm Karaoke Idol @ Burkharts 9:30pm-12am Bear Chest Night @ Atlanta Eagle 10pm Industry night @ Mary’s 10pm S.I.N. (Service Industry Night) @ the Heretic 10pm Stars of the Century @ Jungle 10:30pm Drag on the Edge @ Blake’s 11pm

tue 5.4 Omelette Tuesday @ the Heretic 9am-1pm AEN Networking Luncheon/Brookhaven @ Hudson Grill 11:55am-12:55pm Truth or Dare Tuesdays @ Le Buzz 5pm Bingo @ Woofs 7-10:30pm My Big Fat Gay Bingo @ Frogs 7-9pm Texas Hold ‘Em Poker Night @ Friends on Ponce 7-10pm Trivia & “Wild Card” Talent Night @ Blake’s 7pm Two for One Tuesdays @ Nonna Mia 7-10pm Poker Night and dancing @ 3 Legged Cowboy 7:30pm-12am The Ultimate Music Challenge @ Cowtippers8-10pm “Glee” and Showtunes @ Amsterdam 9pm Mary-oke @ Mary’s 9pm Wii Bowling Tournament @ the Heretic 9:30-11:30pm Karaoke, Eagle Style @ the Eagle 10pm The Sophisticated Ladies of Atlanta Cabaret Show @ Shout! 10:30pm Karaoke w/ Richard @ Burkhart’s 11pm

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BE THERE

HRC GALA DINNER

EQUALITY

by Jason Snead

T

he Human Rights Campaign is the largest national gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender civil rights organization and is the leader in fighting for equal rights for LGBT people. Atlanta’s HRC Gala Dinner and Silent Auction has become one of the largest fundraising events for the organization and brings a range of prestigious entertainers, politicians, corporate sponsors and activists together. The 23rd Annual dinner is themed Every Day and will take place at The Hyatt Regency Atlanta this Saturday May 1, Guests arriving at 6:00 will enjoy dozen bars and live music and enter a shopper’s paradise of more than $200,000 in merchandise donated by dozens of individuals and businesses. Q-100’s Bert Show personality Melissa Carter will emcee the auction. The dinner program begins at 7:30 in the Centennial Ballroom with Providence, Rhode Island Mayor David Cicilline as the featured speaker. An openly gay official, Cicilline is now running for Rep.

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Patrick Kennedy.vacant U.S. House of Representative seat..During the dinner, three awards will be presented with mainliner Andy Cohen, Bravo’s executive producer of Top Chef and the Real Housewives program series, accepting the National Visibility Award. Real Houswives of Atlanta’s NeNe Leakes will appear with Cohen during his acceptance. Two local awards will be given to Georgia Representative Simone Bell and Vandy Beth Glenn respectively. Bell is the first out African-American lesbian to serve in any state house in the nation. Glenn, a transgender woman, testified before Congress in support of the Employment Nondiscrimination Act, which would

prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. After dinner, guests can continue the fun after 10 pm with HRC’s Big Karaoke Party at the Hyatt’s Avanzare restaurant across from the dinner ballroom. For more information on the dinner and purchasing tickets, please visit: atlantahrcdinner.org. Tickets will not be sold at the door. For more information on The Human Rights Campaign, visit hrc.org

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PHOTOBOOTH

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BURKHARTS



MUSIC

TONY MORAN Caesar Morillo

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S

uperstar DJ Tony Moran will be spinning his beats from his latest album entitled MAGIC at Heretic Atlanta this Saturday. The Grammynominee is known for his thunderous tribal beats and when artists like Whitney Houston, Madonna, BeyoncÊ, Britney Spears, Rihanna, Mary J. Blige, Janet Jackson, and Jennifer Lopez want their latest tracks to tear up dance floors across the country, they call upon Moran. Moran has never ceased to amaze the Atlanta community with his unique talent and his power to keep the clubs at capacity and the partygoers in a trance on the dance floor all night. Tony Moran draws his strength from the challenges he faced growing up in Brooklyn; drawing a lot of his musical inspirations from the melting pot of creativity that surrounded him. Moran got his early start by gravitating towards the turntables and attracting glow-stick-loving partygoers by the hundreds to his gigs. In the early 80’s, a prominent radio station in New York City noticed Moran and realized what great talent and potential was put in front of them. Struck by fate at the age of 19, Moran collaborated with producer Albert Cabrera being dubbed The Latin Rascals. The pair came together and fused the latest dance beats with a hint of Latin spice to produce

freestyle mixes of club music. The fans exploded and the result of the collaboration was the pop smash Show Me by the Cover Girls. The hit sold over 1 million copies creating mass demand for the up-and-coming young superstar. The success opened doors for Moran. He was immediately remixing for artists ranging from Run-DMC and LL-Cool-J to The Beach Boys and Diana Ross. Moran and Cabrera continued to perform live in clubs and stadiums across the country with Moran in lead vocals. Moran soon followed his calling and decided to develop himself artistically as an individual. Moran began by producing, remixing, and writing music for diverse artist such as Michael Jackson, Gloria Estefan, Cher, Luther Vandross, and Celine Dion to name a few. Since then, Moran has produced 800 titles, dozens of Top 40 pop hits and countless No. 1 dance singles to his credit and he is still not showing a sign of slowing down. The two-time Grammy-Nominated artist is driven as ever and with the creative freedom to develop and evolve his trademark sound on his own terms, there is no stopping him! Tony Moran at Heretic on Saturday May 1. Doors open at 10pm, $10 before 11pm. and $15 after. 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road hereticatlanta.com

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S S E N I BUS

UR O Y ISE T R E 7 2 6 2 ADV . 9 2 8 . 4 40 om c . e n i az g a m bi s @ n besee


BLAKE’S ON PHOTOBOOTH THE PARK

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DO THIS

DRINK OF THE WEEK

BERRI SOPHISTICATED DO THIS | 1 part ABSOLUT BERRI AÇAÍ 5 blueberries 1 part fresh lime juice 1 part simple syrup 4 parts Perrier-Jouët® NV Champagne

Muddle blueberries in mixing glass. Add ABSOLUT BERRI AÇAI, fresh lime juice and simple syrup. Shake & strain in a champagne flute. Top with chilled PerrierJouët NV Champagne. Garnish with 3 blueberries on a stick.

For this and more drink recipes and inspiration: visitt absolutdrinks.com, or download the Drinkspiration application for iPhone or Android.

Enjoy with ABSOLUT Responsibility.

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www.billkaelin.com


HERETIC THURSDAYS

PHOTOBOOTH

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BEST OF

SOCIAL MEDIA

Enough with the poking, when can we have sex? Really excited for date night with the boyfriend...wrestling here we come! (don’t judge me.) Hi, my name is Mitchell and...I’m a manaholic Tomorrow’s agenda, wake up, fail an exam, give a presentation about trannies, come home and cry, then go to work. Aweseome :-/ If anybody knows who this man is let him know I am looking for him. He just got off a flight from Paris, more details to come... WOW. @lindsaylohan is really making me sad now. She needs help like @britneyspears got. Somewhere in the English country side in a stately manor home, Madonna is weeping. My poor titties are going to be soooo sore tomorrow; I’m going to feel like @heidimontag

Can I just say that Olive Garden commercials are basically the most obnoxious spots ever? First of all, no one who eats at Olive Garden as regularly as the people in the commercials seem to are that thin. Secondly, what kind of amphetamines are these bitches on, and where the hell can I get some? I’ve never in my life been that excited over f*c$ing breadsticks. I predict a 99% chance of snow in this bar’s bathroom; at least 9” Hey, I’m looking for the Pat Sajak look alike who was at Blake’s last night-you’re either really him or his twin! with you. PATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT I LOVE YOU! Forever yours, Man in drag dressed as Vanna Sequence of events: RuPaul’s Drag Race>>Wikipedia’d drag queens>>faux drag queens>>Connie and Carla>>musicals>>West End Cabaret Revival FTW” i’m pretty sure my cat’s been reading my diary.... all day im wondering why the hell everyone is wearing green shirts... then i found out its earth day...woops!

I survived Freaknik 2010! (so far) to the bitch who ashed her cigs all over me & didn’t apologize, I wish you a minor case of syphillis 30

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To submit your best tweets, status updates and missed connections, email social@sbimagazine.com


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