Wesley Beeson/The Sanford Herald
Angela Vendlinski Lett is shown donning her wedding gown in the First Presbyterian Church courtyard.
Bridal Guide
Advertising Supplement Sunday, April 7, 2013
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Wedding Guide
EtiquetteAdvice
An expert's guide for avoiding nuptial faux pas B Y
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uch has changed in the world of wedding nuptials, but not everything. Here are five tips to make the event run smoothly. • Invite all your bridal ding gifts with a thank you attendants at about the note. same time. No one really believes Give a lot of thought to that absurd pronouncethose you want to stand up ment that thank you notes with you at the altar, and must be written within one then invite them to be your year of the wedding. Actuattendants generally within ally a bride’s note-writing the same time frame. They schedule is pretty much a don’t have to be asked on constant consideration that the same day, although should be handled grathat would be best. When ciously and with punctualyou wait many days or ity. weeks, later, it might give Gifts given prior to the impression that there the wedding should be was a replacement (imply- acknowledged in writing ing not a first choice) or before the wedding. That an add-on. This suggestion even includes gifts given also applies to the groom’s within a day or so of the list of groomsmen, but approaching nuptials, as men are not typically sensi- brides are quickly and cortive to such issues. rectly counseled that find• Keep the nuptials rev- ing time for writing notes erent, as it is a sacred occa- after the ceremony is diffision, but don’t feel bound cult at best. Besides, there by every tradition of the will be plenty of gifts to past. arrive at or after the cerIn times past, the bride emony that will challenge was always escorted to the the newlyweds’ ability to altar (and “given away”) by acknowledge gifts in a her father or another male timely fashion. relative. Today’s bride may In decades past, a bride be escor ted was assigned to the altar R.S.V.P. is an the total task by a beloved abbreviation for of acknowlfemale, espeedging all gifts the French cially in cirfrom wellc u m s t a n c e s phrase, “Respond wishers. Forw h e r e t h e please.” According tunately one of f a t h e r, f o r to etiquette, a the emerging whatever reanew trends is s o n , i s n o t written invitation that this task available. In to the wedding (as is now shared second mar- well as other between the riages, often parties associated b r i d e a n d the couple groom. A may choose with the occasion) b r i d e s t i l l to approach requires a written handles the the altar as a response. bulk of the couple, arm in obligation, but arm. A gentlemore modern man always offers his right grooms can be recruited arm to a lady. (Grooms- to help a bit in this task. men, when seating guests, Besides being the right should also be aware of thing to do, a groom’s this protocol.) favorite aunt or the special • The bride and her neighbors who shared in family are responsible his childhood would treafor much of the wedding sure his personally penned expense, but the groom words of gratitude. has responsibility for sev• Be prepared with a eral items. strategy for dealing with The groom pays for R.S.V.P.s (or perhaps the the bride’s bouquet and lack of them.) the boutonnieres of his R.S.V.P. is an abbregroomsmen. He also cov- viation for the French ers the fee of the person p h r a s e , “ R e s p o n d officiating at the ceremo- please.” According to ny. The florist should be etiquette, a written inviinstructed to prepare a tation to the wedding separate invoice for the (as well as other parties groom. The fee for the associated with the occaclergyman may be paid sion) requires a written beforehand, often at the response: “Yes, I’m comrehearsal. ing.” or “No, I can’t make • Acknowledge wed- it.” R.S.V.P. is not the same
as regrets only, which requires a response only if the invitation is declined. This information is important so there will be enough seating at the ceremony and enough food at the reception. Make it known, through family, friends, and attendants, that you are “waiting to hear” from invited guests whether they will be attending or not. It’s not the role of the bride to canvass the guest list, so enlist people to help you determine an accurate number for the reception.
Consider these little while you are preparing the tasty pecan delights for filler. the wedding reception:
Tea Time Tassies Pastry: 1 3-ounce package cream cheese 1⁄2 cup of soft margarine 1 cup plain flour, sifted Soften cream cheese and margarine to room temperature. Stir in flour. Chill at least one hour (or overnight). Shape into 24 small balls and spread each individually into a miniature muffin pan. Bake the muffin crusts at 300 degrees for 8 minutes
Cecilia Budd Grimes is a wedding consultant, author, speaker and certified Filler: 3⁄ 4 cup brown sugar, firmly etiquette and protocol consultant. She received packed 1 egg, beaten her credentials from the 1 tablespoon soft prestigious Protocol School of margarine 1 teaspoon vanilla extract Washington.® She is the author of “What dash of salt 1 cup pecans, chopped It Means To Have A Southern coarsely Wedding,” one of seven titles Remove the once-baked in her popular Southern pastry shells from the oven book series. She directed and spoon the pecan filler her first wedding in 1965. mixture into each cup. Return to the oven at 300 Our State magazine calls degrees for 20-plus her “North Carolina’s resident minutes, or until the filling etiquette expert.” is set.
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Wedding Guide
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Sunday, April 7, 2013 /
Wesley Beeson/The Sanford Herald
Dianne Foushee, owner of Carolina Women’s Fitness, trains soon-to-be wed Amanda Blakley.
BridalFitness
No surprise, looking fabulous involves diet and exercise B Y
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f wearing your mother’s dress, or if the wedding dress of your dreams, requires a slimmer you, the best plan for shedding those extra pounds or firming up for a better silhouette is to start early, according to Dianne Foushee, owner of Carolina Women’s Fitness. But it is not just brides who seek to be trimmer and more tone, but also other members of the bridal party, including the mother of the bride, Foushee said. “The spotlight is on the women in the wedding,” she said. “There’s
just no way around it.” The results for someone shaping up for a big day “depend on just how determined a person is, and how much she wants to change h e r b o d y, h e r d e d i cation and on how far in advance she star ts
befor e the wedding,” Foushee continued. “ We r e c o m m e n d a safe doable pace, losing about two or three pounds a week,” she said “Within three months, you can achieve a lot through exercising, drinking water, weight training and healthy eating. You want a goal you can achieve gradually.” Walking and drinking water are among Foushee’s main recommendations, and she advises someone to drink half of her weight in ounces of water per day. So, a person weighing 120 pounds should drink 60 ounces, Foushee explained. “It seems like a lot of water, but if you drink a couple of glasses of water with each meal and then drink water d u r i n g t h e d a y, i t ’ s achievable,” she said. “We r ecommend that you pair 30 minutes of cardio exercise with drinking water.” As for eating habits, she went on, “We recommend that you eat your bigger meals d u r i n g t h e d a y. L o s ing weight is a lifestyle change that can be
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done. Mainly, we stress eating fr uits and vegetables, drinking lots of water and watching bread intake.” For those who ar e apprehensive about starting a workout regimen, Foushee said that those who come to her facility get a briefing on the equipment. “Even if you have physical limits, usually there is something you can do.” she said. “We have an Expressway program where people come in three times a week, working with the equipment that works on both the upper body and lower body. My best advice is don’t wait until the last month to get in shape.” Just as the name implies, Carolina Women’s Fitness is a health club that caters strictly to women and of fers a full range of equipment with staf f that are National Exercise Trainers Association (NETA) cer tified personal trainers and aerobics instr uctors and yoga cer tified. They of fer a range of classes that begin as early as 7 a.m. and go on until 6:30 p.m. to fit with a busy schedule. The classes include body sculpting, step aerobics, yoga,
zumba and fit ball and mix aerobics. In addition, the club of fers bikes, treadmills, stair climbers, elliptical cross-trainers, free weights, aerobic steps, body bars, fit and medicine bars, abdominal devices and machines. Foushee and her husband, Frank, also own the Olympic Fitness Center, a coed health club on the other side of town on Broadway Road. The Carolina Women’s Fitness club has been open since
1996 and is located at 999 Center Church Road. If, for whatever reason, joining a health club is not an option and the wedding of your dreams is on the horizon, Foushee suggests that there are many things you can do can do at home to get fit like walking, doing pushups, jumping rope, bicycling and doing squats at home. And of course, she stresses drinking water and being mindful of diet.
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Wedding Guide
4 / Sunday, April 7, 2013 /
Wesley Beeson/The Sanford Herald
Jones Printing Company offers an array of invitation styles.
Invitations:
a stylish stamp
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xper ts note that wedding invitations are another way that a bride can reflect her personality and style, especially as the variety of options has increased for both traditional and modern tastes. Invitations are available in numerous shapes, sizes and colors and can come as a simple rectangular card, rolled up like a scroll or designed with any number of folds. Ver y few brides choose the formal, engraved invitation that served as the benchmark of style and elegance for many years, according to one local purveyor. “Brides today usually choose thermography or raised-print invitations because they are much less expensive,” said P.J. Patterson, the office manager at Jones Printing, who has worked with hundreds of brides over the past 22 years. “They use a whole different type of printing process that makes them cost less.” Invitations often use the bride’s wedding colors in decorative ribbon or ink, and the amount of embellishment can greatly impact the price. “The average cost of invitations is about $500 by the time the response cards, reception cards, programs and invitations are printed,” Patterson said. “The cost depends
on what you pick out and how many you need. About the most we have ever ordered was 400, and the least has been 50, with the average in the 175 to 200 range.” With three dif ferent companies to pick from and 10 books to look through, she said, about half of the brides want traditional invitations, and the other half want a modern look. “Sometimes they ask me for help,” Patterson said. “I usually show them the section in the front of the books that
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gives tips on bridal etiquette. I point these out because often a bride or groom will have divorced or separated parents or deceased parents, and these sections show them different ways to handle the situation.” As for timing, Patterson said, “Brides need to order the invitations at least two months before they plan to mail them.” “We’ve had brides get excited and order them six months to a year before the wedding,” she said. “We’ve worked with brides who were living out of town and ordered them through the website without ever coming in.” For brides on a tight budget, one option is getting Hallmark invitations and having them overprinted with the wedding details. “We have wedding
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stock here and can print them here,” Patterson said. “We also do napkins with the couple’s names and date and sometimes notepads. We used to print matchbooks, but we don’t do that much anymore.” One couple found what they wanted at the local Office Max. “ We h a d a c o u p l e that told us they wanted
a camouflage redneck wedding invitation, and our Impress Department helped them design and print their invitation,” said Jason Lesley, store manager. “They couldn’t find any stock to do what they wanted to do, and they left very happy with what we created.” Most wedding programs are printed a couple of weeks before the
big day because sometimes the final details aren’t worked out until then. Patterson said that if at the last minute someone can’t be in the wedding, they can reprint them in a day or two. With all of her years of experience, Patterson said she has learned that the bride is always right and makes the final decision.
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Wedding Guide
Sunday, April 7, 2013 /
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PamperedHands & Feet Brides and attendants indulge at mani-pedi parties
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ith all eyes on the bride and wedding par ty, every small detail is in the spotlight — even the nails. Increasingly over the last couple of years, bridal parties have lived up to their name with mani-pedi gatherings — celebrating the upcoming nuptials by getting pampered. These nail-centered par ties are often organized by the maid of honor, who treats the bride while her bridesmaids usually pay for their own ser vices — which could easily run $40-$50. Local specialists note that this phenomenon has evolved as nail salons have become more prevalent. “It used to be that you could only get a manicure in a full-service salon; now there’s pretty much a nail salon in ever y shopping center,” said Kim Stone,
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who has operated Nails by Kimberly for the past 14 years in Sanford and more than a decade in Florida. “Manicures are seen more as a necessity, not a luxury, today. I had no idea that manicures would be so popular when I started out.” Wedding parties often bring plastic flutes, champagne and orange juice to their appointments, Stone said, “and I supply sweet treats that they enjoy while they are being pampered.” “With large wedding par ties, I may do the bride and attendants a week or a few days before the wedding, and then do the moms and grandmothers as another group,” she added. “The
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attendants usually opt for both the manicure and pedicure, while the older group usually just gets a manicure.” French manicures are popular among brides, Stone said, but attendants often coordinate their polish color with their dress and usually opt for a single block color. “And, they always know they can never outdo the bride,” she said. In selecting a salon for the wedding party, Stone recommended that the maid of honor select a nail shop based on its public reputation or personal experience. ”I highly recommend that you check out a salon before booking one for the wedding party. Salons
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are like restaurants and have a rating you should take into account as well,” Stone said. “My salon has personal aspects to it that most do not. There is a price difference in the product line that salons use and carry. Many nail salons deal in quantity, not quality.” When scheduling the party, specialists say its best to book the appointment a couple of weeks in advance and to allow at least 30 minutes for a manicure and an hour for a manicure and a pedicure. Stone’s salon is located at 1207 Woodland Ave. and is open Monday through Friday from 9 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. and Saturdays from 9 a.m. until 3 p.m.
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Wedding Guide
6 / Sunday, April 7, 2013 /
Twice is nice
Bride has day of her dreams when groom returns from Afghanistan B Y
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ith only a few months before the wedding date last year, mother of the bride Donna King learned that all the plans she had made with her daughter, Courtney, for the fair ytale church wedding with all their friends and family present wasn’t going to happen. At best, if Cour tney and her husband to be, Tony, were to be mar ried before Tony’s deployment to Afghanistan, they would have to have a small, quickly put together wedding for immediate family. So, the couple married in December, 2011, and not quite a year later, after Tony came home, they mar ried again in a ceremony at First Baptist Church in what the mother of the bride describes as both magical and the wedding of her daughter’s dreams. “In a per fect world, we wouldn’t have had two weddings, but this wasn’t a per fect situation,” King said. “We had planned originally for the wedding to occur March 17, 2012. We had reser ved the Chapel at the First Baptist Church and the Elks Club for the reception. I had already bought my dress for a spring wedding since it was going to be in March.” Tony and his loved ones learned in December that he would probably be deployed soon, which he was in January, so the wedding date was changed to Dec. 22, 2011. About 15 people attended that first wedding ceremony at the First Baptist Chapel, with a reception in the church parlor. The bride was dressed in church attire. After the wedding, the bride, who was still a student at East Carolina University, lived in an apar tment in Greenville while the bridegroom ser ved his country. When he returned in August, King said, “we started making plans for their second wedding, which occurred Dec. 15, 2012.” “People were so suppor tive,” King continued. “They acted as if the second wedding was the first one. Most people knew they had had a small ceremony and were going to do a big one.” A 90-year-old neighbor told King that she had been in the same situation during World War II. She had married her sweethear t, who was ready to ship out, and then wed him again when he came home. “She told me two weddings worked back then, and it would again,” King said. Having two weddings was a little extra expense, King added, “but we wer e willing to do this for her. Her father and I wanted to give her the wedding of her dreams.” A dream that included Cour tney in a wedding gown, a 4 p.m. ceremony at the church with about 120 people in attendance, including the original
cast of five bridesmaids, parents, extended family and friends, and a dinner reception at the Circle M Barn. “I probably would not have had the reception at the barn if we had the wedding as scheduled because I didn’t know about it then,” King said. “With the delay, I found out about the Circle M Bar n, and the whole night was magical. A lot of parents wouldn’t have done this.” The couple, who met through mutual friends at Cour tney’s senior prom at Lee Senior, now resides at Fort Bragg.
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Couples have been choosing venues such as San Lee Park (left) and Woodlake Meadows (right) as alternatives to traditional wedding locations.
SomewhereUnexpected Many couples choosing unconventional venues B Y
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s soon as the date is set, the next step for many brides is reser ving the venue for the ceremony and reception.
For more than 25 years, a number of local brides have chosen San Lee Park. Since this fall, they have also considered the Barn at Woodlake Meadows. During Park Ranger Steve Godfrey’s 27 years at San Lee, he’s seen quite a few weddings because he figures at least 10-15 couples use the outdoor site each year. “We have a couple places at the park that have been popular for weddings,” Godfrey said. “We have a small chapel in the park that works well with groups of about 30 people, and then a lot of people use the meadow area, which has a 300-foot bridge across two lakes, an amphitheater and a waterfall.” Godfrey’s advice is for a couple to come out to the park and assess the sun’s position at 2 p.m. to determine the placement of their archway and chairs — ensuring the best view with the most shade. The ranger added that some wedding parties use the multi-purpose room as a dressing room for the bride, and others use it for a small reception. The meadow area and room rent for $105 a day for the whole wedding. “We don’t provide archways,” he said. “but they can get that somewhere like Sanford Rent-All. They often decorate the bridge and the multi-purpose room. When they get married here, they can have some left over after the wedding.” The weather hasn’t always cooperated. Godfrey recalled one bride, who had planned to leave in a hot air balloon but was forced to make other arrangements due to a sudden wind storm, and the bridal party moved to the picnic shelter in the pavilion to get out of the weather. While a couple can’t foresee every possible pitfall, the ranger advised those wanting to wed at the San Lee to plan as much as possible. “We have a reservation system at the park, so I’d recommend that they contact us four to six weeks in advance because we get
busy in the summer,” he said. “We are staffed seven days a week, and I live in the park. We have a wonderful assistant park ranger staff that works weekends and afternoons.” The park saw a lot of weddings back in the 90s, Godfrey said, and some pairs have returned to renew their vows. At Woodlake Meadows, owners Linda and Bruce Hall strive to offer brides a unique, peaceful setting out in the country with the amenities of a spacious building that can accommodate groups of more than 200 people inside or outside on the decks and along the water. “We got into this because a friend of my daughter, Meredith, had a hard time finding a place to have her wedding,” said Linda Hall. “They ended up at a farm near Chapel Hill. After we got back home from the wedding, we realized that if they could turn a dairy barn into a wedding venue, we could do something even nicer.” Before it became a site for weddings and parties, her husband used the barn as a place where he parked his trucks each night. Hall has upgraded his barn from a truck garage to a building that features a bar in the loft and accommodations for a caterer and electrical capacity to run sound systems for DJs or bands. He has added a covered patio, several decks overlooking the water, a variety of lighting and tables and chairs to handle crowds of more than 200 people. “Bruce keeps the place in tip-top shape. In the summertime, he might mow the grass two or three times a week,” she said. For brides who want a less formal, more of a party, atmosphere with dancing, Hall said, “this works well.” “Brides can come on Friday about lunchtime and have the building through Sunday,” she said. “It gives them a day after the wedding to get their stuff out. We provide the tables and chairs, so they just need to rent the linens, decorate and have the caterer
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arrange the food.” Above all, Hall added, “We offer brides flexibility.” “When my niece got married recently in Atlanta, we had to be in and out of the facility in five hours,” she said. “That adds a lot of stress — all that rushing when you are dealing with a strict timeline. Because of that, we rent the barn for the weekend and don’t try to have two or three weddings.” Wedding parties have the option of using the spacious 5,000 square-foot building, or a combination of outside around the lake for the ceremony and the reception inside. Because the building rents for the weekend, they can have the rehearsal dinner there as well. “We recommend that you call as soon as you know the date,” Hall said. “We’ve already have three or four people who have reserved dates in 2014. We have only begun to scratch the surface in letting people know about the barn. We just got our website at www. woodlakemeadows.com.” The Halls can be reached at (919) 545-1139 to reserve the venue.
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