Fun [ NEWS OF THE WEIRD ] BY CHUCK SHEPHERD
Frontiers of Fashion
As Americans’ fascination with guns grows, so, too, does the market for protection against all those flying bullets. Texan John Adrain has introduced an upscale sofa whose cushions can stop up to a .44 Magnum fired at close range, and is now at work on bullet-resistant window blinds. Another company, BulletSafe, recently touted its $129 baseball caps (with protection against the same bullets, but only in front) — though the company admits the cap won’t prevent concussions. The Colombian suit and vest designer Miguel Caballero offers an array of bullet- and knife-resistant selections, made with Kevlar and Dyneema, which are also used by clothiers BladeRunner and Aspetto (maker of “ballistic tuxedos”).
Leading Economic Indicators
Notorious French derivatives trader Jerome Kerviel was fired in 2010 after his employer (Societe Generale bank) discovered that he had made unauthorized trades worth about $55 billion and then, by forgery and fraud, covered them up. In June, however, Kerviel won a wrongful-discharge case when France’s Court of Cassation concluded the bank had “no real and serious” reason to fire him. Actually, the court ordered the bank to pay Kerviel about $500,000 in “performance” bonuses, based on the profit that his rogue trades eventually earned. Even though the bank had spent the equivalent of $5.5 billion unwinding Kerviel’s trades, they still made money (because, before the world economy collapsed in 2008, the derivatives business was very good).
Ronnie Music Jr., 45, won a scratch-off lottery prize last year of $3 million in Waycross, Georgia, and must surely have thought he was on a roll — because he soon flipped the money into a Georgia methamphetamine gang. The “bet” went sour, and he now faces decades in prison, as he pleaded guilty in July to drug trafficking and firearms violations after his associates were found with $1 million worth of meth and a load of guns.
Government in Action
Montpelier, Vermont, has one solution to America’s well-known problem of ignoring infrastructure maintenance (and the high cost of asphalt). While other cities and states merely delay needed road work (though with harsh consequences to drivers), Montpelier has begun to unpave some of its roads, converting them back to cheaper, annoying gravel and dirt (and inevitably, dust). A recent report by Montana State University researchers expressed surprise that so many governments are choosing this option. Phoenix’s KTAR-TV reported in July that the local sheriff (the notorious “tough on crime” Joe Arpaio) has already cost the government $10.4 million in attorneys’ fees for successful lawsuits filed against him by illegally profiled Hispanics. A judge found months ago (awarding $4.5 million) that Arpaio was deliberately violating the court’s orders, and lawyers have demanded another $5.9 million to bring Arpaio’s resistances up to date. (Unless the court rules otherwise, the $5.9 million will ultimately come from taxpayers.)
[ LAST WEEK’S SOLUTION ON PAGE 26 ]
[ LOVESCOPE ] BY EUGENIA LAST ARIES (March 21-April 19): Offering confirmation, passion and plans with someone you love will lead to greater stability in your personal life. If you are willing to take a giant step, you will find the happiness and satisfaction you are searching for. Don’t let insecurity lead to loneliness. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You’ve got the finesse and confidence to attract someone of a superior nature. Don’t sit at home when you should be out socializing and engaging in conversations with people who have just as much to offer as you. Shoot for the stars, and you will find that special someone.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Don’t believe everything you hear. Someone trying to impress you will reel you in and disappoint you. Discretion will be needed when dealing with affairs of the heart. Refuse to let anyone draw you into situations that are not in your best interest. Slow down and realize when to walk away. CANCER (June 21-July 22): You’ll be drawn to someone from a different background. See what transpires, and learn from the experience. The potential regarding a relationship that is unique is outstanding and will broaden your horizons and open doors you never knew existed. Share your feelings and experiences.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): You need a change. Try something different, or visit a destination you have never been before. Participate in pastimes that allow you to use your skills. Attraction to someone will be strong, but probably short-lived. Chemistry as well as sharing the same likes and dislikes will be necessary before engaging intimately. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Don’t push anyone too hard, or you will get the wrong response. Bide your time when it comes to love and situations that can influence your living arrangements. Share feelings, but opt not to make promises or make physical advances that will complicate your life.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): You’ll be drawn to someone who isn’t available. Keep your distance, and don’t share your feelings with anyone. Personal information will be used against you and create a problem for you in your circle of friends. Your reputation will be at damaged if you aren’t discrete. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Put your feelings out there, and you will find someone special. You can enhance your life and bring about unusual changes at home if you are willing to take a chance on love. Someone quite different from you will turn out to be a perfect fit.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You’ll find it difficult to get along with partners. Jealousy and ulterior motives will keep you from making sound choices when dealing with relationships. Stick close to home, and work on self-awareness and improvements that will help build your confidence. Insecurity on your part or someone else’s will cause friction. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Don’t be daunted by what others do or say. If you love someone, share your thoughts, feelings and intentions, and move forward. You are the best judge of who you should be with. A promise and a plan can be put in place and secure your relationship.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Make it your mission to go above and beyond the call of duty to get someone’s attention. A highly engaging invitation or a passionate retreat will help you step things up a notch and encourage a commitment. Don’t be afraid to make the first move. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Consider how the object of your attention treats others. It will be a telltale sign of what’s to come, should you engage in a deeper relationship. Don’t put up with any sort of abusive or controlling actions. Equality is what will make your relationship work.
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