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Every year I make myself promises to grow or improve some aspect of my life. And every year, most of these promises end up being unfulfilled. I won’t be the only one to go through this same cycle of wanting to better myself, and ultimately leaving them in the dust with the old year. So why do we continue to make ourselves half-empty promises, and how exactly can we truly make good on them?
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Personally, I love making New Year’s Resolutions. I like the idea of constantly growing as a person and setting myself goals to accomplish. Whether that is related to getting fitter and stronger at the gym (not going as planned), saving for a house (on track), getting an A1 on an essay (yet to be seen), or writing my novel (what novel?), I pretty much make a resolution for everything.
The one resolution that I am particularly feeling the pressure to complete this year is one I’m sure many other bookworms are feeling too: the Goodreads Reading Challenge. Reading, for me, is a form of escapism, and one that brings a sense of calm and pure joy, which is why falling behind on my Goodreads Challenge stings a little (okay, a lot). I reluctantly admit that I am failing spectacularly at completing my reading goals for 2022, with my total currently sitting at 45 books out of 60 (bumped down from 70) – and even more reluctantly admit that this total has not budged since September! With university readings taking priority, I fear I’ve hit a reading slump, and as the end of the year grows nearer, it seems more unlikely that this year I will not have read what I intended to. However, I will not be disheartened just yet as the Christmas holidays are just around the corner, and even if I don’t complete my goal this year, what fun I will have had reading them anyway! Perhaps we put too much pressure on ourselves to fulfil our grand New Year resolutions. They become this big, scary thing looming over us which can leave us overwhelmed. Resolutions, at their heart, are about change, so let’s embrace that: let’s change how we tackle our resolutions to make the most of them, and let them reflect who we are now and who we want to become in the future. Resolutions are just like goals, and there is a mountain of information out there about goal setting and sticking to them. Being able to stay on track with your goals is about finding the right way for you, as we’re all different. If you are a little like me, organised to a tee and obsessed with notebooks, then a good first step is writing down your resolutions. This also means you can keep track of how you’re getting on with them later down the line. Breaking down your resolutions into smaller, more manageable weekly and/or monthly goals is a great way to reduce the pressure of the grand resolution. Reward yourself when you complete a milestone in your resolution journey. Whether that’s buying a chocolate treat, a new top, or binge-watching your favourite tv-show – just celebrate yourself and what you’ve achieved! My final tip is to let go of the pressure and forgive yourself if you don’t manage to complete your goals. At the end of the day, you’re trying, and doing something good for yourself, so remember if things don’t go to plan, it’s okay! As for my resolutions for 2023, you can certainly count on me to have my list ready for the 1st January. But next year will be different. I want to break the vicious cycle of unfulfilled resolutions I set myself. And to do that, I’m going to take my resolutions one step at a time, forgive myself if I fall behind, and just enjoy the year. Who knows, maybe 2023 is the year I write my novel? Learn Spanish? Read 100 books? The possibilities are endless.
[Ella Duff - she/her]
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