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Great foodie? Food newbie? A great culinary adventure is just around the corner.

culinary center at Whole Foods Market cooking classes • catering • private events

Below the downtown Whole Foods Market store you’ll find our Culinary Center, featuring full catering services, a hands-on cooking classroom, and all the kitchen gadgets your inner chef desires. Pick up a schedule and menus for more information. At the corner of Sixth Street and Bowie Street Classes: 542–2340 Catering and Events: 542–2209

downtown 525 North Lamar at Sixth St. 476-1206 gateway 9607 Research Blvd. at Loop 360 345-5003

Welcome to Austin Welcome to Austin, Texas for the Flat Track Derby Championship Tournament. The skaters, staff, and wonderful fans of flat track derby are making this sport into something that isn’t going away; it is only getting stronger. Texas Rollergirls has seen it in our own evolution and it’s echoed in the development of the Women’s Flat Track Derby Association and roller derby around the world. I never thought this day would come in my skating career. I thought I’d be long retired before there were so many competing teams in the USA, before kids were playing Junior Derby, before flat track went international, before it was a sport on TV. When I started derby there was one league in Austin with 60 skaters. Today leagues came from sea to shining sea for this tournament and there are almost 10,000 skaters worldwide. When I started derby girls fixed their makeup and fishnet garters before skating. Today we fix our wheels, matching each wheel to each surface, with each nut perfectly tightened, and still have time to fix our makeup. When I started derby we were advised to clip our nails before a game so we wouldn’t scratch each other. Today there are 7 + refs per game giving ‘advice’ to keep us from scratching each other. When I started derby my team’s favorite strategy was to throw a fight at a crucial point in the game. Today my team’s favorite strategy is... well, buy me a drink and ask me Sunday night when the games are done. I can’t wait to see where y’all take me tomorrow! Thanks to everyone who helped put this tournament together and biggest thanks to Tournament Committee member Bloody Mary who allowed me to work by her side for the last six months and pretend to be Chair of the Tournament Planning Committee. Thank you for coming! Thank you for skating! Thank you for supporting! Thank you for cheering! Welcome to the Texas Shootout, where we love ya ‘til it hurts! Lucille Brawl Tournament Chair

WFTDA Championship Tournament

All About WFTDA

I knew this would happen. Get a bunch of smart ladies in a room together, they’re bound to come up with some far-flung plan for world domination, especially these ladies. Nothing’s ever good enough for them. It’s not enough fun to roller skate, they want to hit their friends. Hitting their friends isn’t enough, they want to hit strangers. Hitting strangers isn’t enough, they want a trophy for hitting the best. The Women’s Flat Track Derby Association is beyond proud to be represented by every skater and official on the track – these ladies and gentlemen (and many more) are the lifeblood of the WFTDA, the brain trust and decision makers of flat-track roller derby. Our three-plus years of hard work culminates this weekend; our dream comes true as our sport develops. I’m beyond proud to represent the WFTDA during this dynamic time. On behalf of us all I’d like to thank the fans and skaters for witnessing this event and wish the competitors (and refs) the best of luck. Volunteering to direct a flat-track roller derby tournament is like Karmic gold – buy Lucille Brawl some new Swiss Bones and maybe some of it will rub off on you. And as for those Texas Rollergirls: you know, this is all your fault. It’s only appropriate that you should host the first WFTDA Championship Tournament, considering what you got us all into. We love YOU way past hurtin’. I know what’s going to happen next, too............................Turn Left! Crackerjack President, WFTDA 2008 WFTDA Tournaments, AUTUMN 2008 Western Regionals- Houston, TX Eastern Regionals- Madison, WI 2008 Championships- Portland, OR Founded in 2004, the WFTDA promotes and fosters the sport of women’s flat track derby by facilitating the development of athletic ability, sportswomanship, and goodwill among member leagues. The governing philosophy is “by the skaters, for the skaters.” Women skaters are primary owners, managers, and operators of each member league and of the association. Operational tasks include setting standards for rules, seasons, and safety, and determining guidelines for the national and international athletic competitions of member leagues. All member leagues have a voice in the decision-making process, and agree to comply with the governing body’s policies.

Trackside Announcers Jim “Kool Aid” Jones Texas Rollergirls

Whiskey L’Amour Texas Rollergirls

Julio E. Glasses Texas Rollergirls

Chip Queso

Texas Rollergirls

Randy Pan (the Goat Boy) Rat City Rollergirls \ The Professor Rat City Rollergirls


Gotham Girls Roller Derby

Margaret Thrasher Gotham Girls Roller Derby


Tucson Roller Derby

Jeffrey Calmer Tucson Roller Derby


Windy City Rollers

Bryant Mumble Windy City Rollers


Carolina Rollergirls

D’Nouncer Duane Cunningham Kansas Roller Warriors

Big Pappa Razzi Detroit Derby Girls

Rusty Wheeler Detroit Derby Girls

Tournament Officials Justice Feelgood Marshall Charm City Roller Girls


Gotham Girls Roller Derby

Endless Justin

Gotham Girls Roller Derby

Mr. Rawk

Gotham Girls Roller Derby

Ritchie Dagger Tucson Roller Derby

Johnny Crash

Tucson Roller Derby

Roman Johnson Tucson Roller Derby

X-Ray Specs

Tucson Roller Derby

Orange Crush

Houston Roller Derby

Rushin’ Cleavage Houston Roller Derby

The Prosecutor Houston Roller Derby


Minnesota RollerGirls

The Statisfier Philly Rollergirls

Rev. Riot

Mad Rollin’ Dolls

Electric Bill

Kansas City Roller Warriors


Rocky Mountain Rollergirls

Officials Not Pictured: Bitchin Camaro Rose City Rollers Cupples Sk8 Rose City Rollers Drill Master Rose City Rollers Jeff da-Ref Boston Derby Dames Ref Raff (no affiliation) Akin Keister Alamo City Rollergirls Maui Owie Alamo City Rollergirls Dr. Vroom Windy City Rollers Ricochet Assassination City Derby Maxx Chaos Mad Rollin’ Dolls

Johnny Roastbeef Texas Rollergirls


Texas Rollergirls Head REf, Texas Shootout

WFTDA Championship Tournament

Rules Overview Greetings from your stalwart referee crew, and welcome to the first-ever Texas Shootout! We were going to use this space to tell you a little bit about how the game of derby is played. You know, there are five players on the track from each team, one of them is the jammer, she wears a star, yadda yadda yadda. But then we remembered that you’re here at the dadburn Nationals, and you probably already know a thing or two about the greatest sport going on today. So instead, we’re going to go over a few of the lesser-known rules of roller derby -- things you may have seen in action before but didn’t quite understand at the time. Leeeeeeead Jammer! (Or Not) A relatively new concept in the most recent WFTDA ruleset (2.1.1) is that a jammer becomes ineligible for lead if she goes out of bounds for *any* reason before she closes to within 20 feet of the pack. This means that jammer-on-jammer action right off the starting line can be a strategic move if a team is trying to ensure that their opponents can’t nab that all-important lead jammer status. Look to see some of the more physical jammers try to take advantage of this! Once a jammer gets to within 20 feet of the pack, going out of bounds no longer makes her automatically ineligible for lead, but she still must eventually get past all opponents legally and in-bounds to become lead. Dude, Where’s My Star? One of the rarer plays you may see employed at the Texas Shootout is the “star pass” -- in which a jammer passes her helmet cover to her team’s pivot. Once the pivot gets the helmet cover on, she takes over the role of the jammer for the rest of the jam, while the original jammer switches to pivot! Teams might employ this maneuver to salvage some points with an exhausted jammer, or maybe just as a surprise to catch the other team sleeping. But it can be a risky move for the star-passing team, too: -- The star must be handed off directly from the jammer to the pivot, not thrown or passed via other teammates. -- Only the status of jammer can be passed, not the status of *lead* jammer -- if a lead jammer removes her helmet cover, she automatically forfeits lead jammer status for the rest of the jam. -- If the helmet cover is dropped during the pass, only the original jammer or original pivot may pick it up, and they must skate in the normal direction to retrieve it. Since a jammer can’t score points unless she’s wearing that helmet cover, a dropped star can be a real liability! Musical Jammers Sometimes, jammers are naughty, and they have to go sit in time-out. On occasion, though, both jammers are naughty at around the same time, and they both end up in the penalty box at the same time. Of course, with no jammers out on the floor, there can’t be any scoring, and where’s the fun in that? So there’s a special procedure when a jam suddenly becomes jammerless: the jam immediately ends, and a new jam begins with the same skaters. Each jammer gives her helmet star to a teammate already on the track, and those teammates become the jammers in the following jam. Meanwhile, the original jammers serve out their penalties as normal, rejoining play as blockers once their penalty ends. With no substitutions allowed, this can really change the nature of a jam if a blocker is suddenly forced into surprise jamming duty!

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It’s Not Over Till It’s Over With the level of competition you’ll be treated to in this national tournament, it’s quite possible that you’ll see one of the most exciting happenstances in roller derby (and there are a lot to choose from): overtime! So far in this year’s WFTDA tournament play, there’s already been one overtime game, a thrilling 104-99 victory for Detroit over Boston in the first round of the Heartland Havoc Eastern Regional. If the teams are tied up at the end of the 60 minutes of regulation, a single overtime jam determines the winner. No lead jammer will be declared, so the jam will go the full 2 minutes! Since there can be no lead jammer, jammers start scoring on their *first* trip through the pack, not the second. Penalties are called as normal, but you can bet that won’t stop the action from getting a bit chaotic! If the teams are still tied after that jam, we’ll all take a very deep breath and do it again until we have a winner.

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Justice Feelgood Marshall -America’s Referee Head Ref, Charm City Roller Girls WFTDA Rules Committee


Member Central Texas

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WFTDA Championship Tournament


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“Learn to School the Competition� Over 25 years experience Owned and Operated by Derby Girls

Coach Shirley N. Sane aka - Linda Dorso Pena cell - 813.391.8211

Our 3D Philosophy Roller Derby is an amazing sport that draws women of all ages and athletic abilities to have the DESIRE to join. Because of the range of levels and the nature of the sport it is very important to have the DEDICATION to train and prepare your league properly to reach their goals. Our approach helps keep injuries to a minimum, and reinforces basic skating skills while keeping the practices fun. It takes a lot of DETERMINATION to keep going through the hard work and minor injuries. The information we offer and the Boot Camps we put on are designed to help new leagues just starting out as well as leagues that are established and just want some fresh ideas. We are constantly changing topics to stay current with the needs of Derby. Is your league ready to take it to the next level?

RatratCity All Stars city rollergirls est. 2004


n a world that was once peaceful and free, with unicorns and rollergirls and affordable beer, there is a terrible unrest. There is doubt spreading across the land. There is fear and confusion about just who rules at roller derby. Knowing something must be done, a team of derby warriors -- a coalition of the frightening, if you will -- will leave their secret invisible hideout at the top of Seattle’s Space Needle to embark upon a perilous journey into the very heart of darkness: Texas. They are green, and they are mean. They will destroy all others who call themselves the best, they will annihilate the naysayers and any others who would skate in their way, and they will prove, once and for all, that the NEW capital of roller derby is SEATTLE! There is one team that plays smarter, skates faster, hits harder than the rest! There is one team that looks better, smells better, and is significantly more fun at after-parties! There is one team ... ONE TEAM TO RULE THEM ALL ... the Rat City Rollergirls All-Stars!

D-Bomb Burnett Down Miss Fortune Juliet Bravo Pia Mess Skate Trooper Jowanna Asskickin’


8 16 99 76 24/7 55 23


Femme Fatale Valtron Rettig to Rumble Carmen Getsome Edie Brickwall Ann R. Kissed Blonde An’ Bitchen

18 3000 29 12 Gauge 10 Ton 0 28

WFTDA Championship Tournament

Drew Blood Matilda the Hun Morning Gory Meg Myday Billie Boilermaker

7 Pints 5 or 6 28 i 17 oz.

Saddletramps tucson rollerderby est. 2004


ormed in 2004, this rough ‘n tumble band of outlaws represents Tucson Roller Derby for national play. Made up of skaters from all four of TRDs home teams, the TRD Saddletramps set aside all differences, lace up their skates, and show the nation how roller derby is played in the Wild Wild West. The TRD Saddletramps are ranked #2 both Nationally and in the Western Region by the WFTDA.

Deadlock Doe 333 Tombstone Teri RIP Barbicide 187 Boom Town Bandit 3-2-1 Eli Wallop 24/7 Kali Clanton 1917 Liberty Valancezuela * *

TEAM ROSTER Polly Graf Randi Canyon Sami Automatic Sassy Sue Sloppy Flo Two-Bit Ore Whiskey Mick

7 986 22 62 8 49 cents C-4

WFTDA Championship Tournament

Foxxy Locket Huckle Betty Metal Maiden Tumbleweed

0 (spade) 1980 711


Texecutioners texas rollergirls est. 2003


aul is dead.

I am the Walrus. Koo Koo Kachoo.

Buckshot Electra Blu Sedonya Face Barbarella Cat Tastrophe Dinah Mite Curvette


21 23 420 66 XX 00 76


Dagger Deb Lady Stardust Belle Starr Bloody Mary Lady X Trouble Lucille Brawl

77 51 1889 40 X 10 56

WFTDA Championship Tournament

Derringer .44 Rice Rocket 3e8 Sparkle “Motion” Plenty Slim Kickins 22 Muffin Tumble 28 Cheap Trixie 41


Roller Warriors kansas city roller warriors est. 2005


he Kansas City Roller Warriors are the angry, mutant, love child of Dirty Britches, Brooke Leavitt, and Princess Anna Conda, Mandy Durham. The initial idea for the league was born in the spring of 2004 inspired helped by the Texas Rollergirls, Leavitt semi-jokingly suggested the idea of forming a Kansas City roller derby league. After a brief discussion the girls decided it was an idea worthy of pursuit. Since then the Roller Warriors have went on the capture the hearts and admiration of fans during the 2006 Dust Devil. After taking a year and beefing up the KC All Star team with the help of Coach Death and instruction from a new coach, Coach Ice, the All Stars took on Dust Devil 07. As the underdogs in the west, the KC Roller Warriors All Star reigned supreme and took forth to secure their spot at Nationals. Again, Kansas City Roller warriors promise to capture your heart....and skate all over it until it BLEEDS!!

Bruz-Her (C) Jessika Rabid Red Ripper Xcelerator Annie Maul (Co-C) Snot Rocket Patti Wackin

244 11 42 34 111 4 911

TEAM ROSTER Xavia Princess Slay-Ya Rita Ploy Archie Lee Dee Claw Jade Lightning Dominant Jean

23 XOXO 19 59 007 816 XX

WFTDA Championship Tournament

Ami-Geddon Bad Omen Fearlys Snap Dragon Speed Razor Missile Toes

7 999 12 66 13 1UP


1 East - Gotham Girls Roller Derby Game 1 - Sat., 11 am 4 West - Kansas City Roller Warriors Game 5 - Sun., 11 am 3 East - Carolina Rollergirls Game 2 - Sat., 1:30 pm 2 West - Tucson Roller Derby

2 East - Windy City Rollers Game 3 - Sat., 4 pm 3 West - Texas Rollergirls Game 6 - Sun., 1:30 pm 4 East - Detroit Derby Girls Game 4 - Sat., 7 pm 1 West - Rat City Rollergirls

2007 WFTDA Championship Tournament September 29-30, 2007 Austin Convention Center Exhibit Hall 5 Austin, TX Hosted by:

Finals- Sun., 7 pm


CONSOLATION / THIRD PLACE: Loser Game 5 Game 7 - Sun., 4 pm Loser Game 6

F o r

A l l

Y o u r

N a u g h t y

N e e d s !

DoN’t DrEam It... BE It! Mark Your Calendars For Lots of October Devilry and Revelry! Photo is by ForeFatherPhotos


oct 12-13 texas Burlesque Festival oct 26 Extravagasm Fantasy Ball oct 28 North Loop Block Party


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Gotham Girls gotham girls roller derby est. 2004


oming at you from the heart of the Big Apple, Gotham Girls Roller Derby is a flat track league tough enough to have honed its skills on the mean streets of New York City. GGRD is honored to send a fierce travel team made up of skaters from home teams the Brooklyn Bombshells, Manhattan Mayhem, Queens of Pain, and the Bronx Gridlock to compete against the best flat track derby teams in the nation. The Gotham skaters are also thrilled to skate in Austin, birthplace of the modern flat track derby revolution. Thanks to the Texas Rollergirls for holding this awe-inspiring event, and thanks to our derby sisters from all over for making our sport into the amazing phenomenon it’s become. We can’t wait to take on each and every one of you on the track someday--we’ll show you just how tough New Yorkers on skates can be!

Kandy Kakes Hela Skelter Donna Matrix Anne Phetamean Hard Anya Cheap Skate Fisti Cuffs


10 31 2 7 i4i 2¢ 241


Beyonslay Suzy Hotrod Ana Bollocks Rolletta Lynn Surly Temple Ginger Snap Bonnie Thunders

Top 40 55 OO O1 99 80 340

WFTDA Championship Tournament

Brigitte Barhot swinging 60s Sweet Sherry Pie 201 Raggedy Animal 67 Beatrix Slaughter 42

WFTDA Championship Tournament


Carolina Rollergirls carolina rollergirls est. 2004


aleigh - North Carolina Formed in January 2004, the Carolina Rollergirls’ mission is to bring alternative sports entertainment to North Carolina while training for national competition. Currently ranked 7th in the WFTDA, the Carolina Rollergirls is a 501c3 non-profit organization promoting the physical and mental strength and independent spirit of women. We are run for the skaters, by the skaters.

Princess America Ms. Anthrope the Mordant Shirley Temper (C) Denise Lightning Kitty Crowbar (C) Lucy Lastkiss Zella Lugosi


1492 17 56 223 110 5 63


Eva Lye Betty Rumble Militia Maddat U Violet Femme Billy the Kid DVS

13 11 10 256 37 1 131

WFTDA Championship Tournament

Holly Wanna Crackya Krewesader Kate


DDG Program Page OHIO Regionals


6:14 PM

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Detroit Derby Girls Travel Team 2007 Captain: Meg Phite #00 Manager: Scarlette Fever #13 Bikini Killer #L1 Black Eyed Skeez #313 Cats Meow #9 Cookie Rumble #33 1/3 Deadly Dose #XX Del Bomber #76 Elle McFearsome #6 Honey Suckit #1974 Juicy Contusion #777 KillBox #989 Lady MacDeath #187 Pain MacGowan #2 Racer McChaseHer #2.8 Rock Candy #10¢ Rude Awakening #12 Sass Knuckles #200º Smashing Darling #26 Summers Eve-L #68 Vega Vendetta #181 Vicious Vixen #-0 Whiskey Soured #31

Photo by: Andy Tanguay

From the midst of automobile factories, abandoned buildings and the Ambassador Bridge come the newest breed of Detroit muscle. That’s right, its The Detroit Derby Girls, here and ready for action. After combining players from Detroit's four teams, the Detroit P i s t o f f s , t h e P i s t o l w h i p p e r s , t h e D-Funk Allstars, and the Devils Night Dames, this new team is comprised of the toughest of the t o u g h . Th e fa s t e s t o f t h e fa s t . I n s h o r t , t h e b e s t o f t h e b e s t , o r a t l e a s t t h e available ones. Growing up on the streets of Detroit has made these girls tough, g u a rd e d a n d s m a r t , a c o m b i n a t i o n t h a t a l l o f t h e m a re p ro u d o f. D e t ro i t i s notorious for its dark and menacing nature and these girls love every grimy inch of it. You can’t survive Detroit without getting a bit dirty in the process. The DDG has been eagerly awaiting the opportunity to show the rest of the world what the underground city of America can do. Now, they have their opportunity, and you better believe, they are gonna t ake it.

WFTDA Championship Tournament




nlike most band stories, the story of the LOWER CLASS BRATS did not start out “innocently enough”. It was more like a full-blown attack on their local music scene. The war started in January 1995 in Austin, Texas when the BRATS set out to destroy all of the emo, college and garage bands that had some how taken over their city. Many years, countless beers and drug additctions later, the boys are still waging war. Not just in their hometown though, with the help of fans world wide they’ve set out to take over the planet. In the time that the LOWER CLASS BRATS have been pounding out their own brand of Clockwork Punk they have released a fuck-load of recordings including appearances on several compilations, live DVD’s and soundtracks in two different films (nudge, nudge- wink, wink). In the past decade the BRATS have toured the globe. Mexico, Germany, North America, Canada, England, Japan, France and many, many other countries have witnessed the boys in action. And the LOWER CLASS BRATS don’t seem to be slowing down any time soon. From their first gig over ten years ago, to this day- L.C.B. always steals the show.


Junior Roller Derby

he Tucson Derby Brats started out as a few kids devoted to roller derby who began skating together in February 2006 right after watching the 2006 Dust Devil, the first WFTDA National tournament held in Tucson, AZ. Over the past year and a half we have steadily gathered more and more devoted skaters and their families and currently have 24 active skaters, aged 10 to 17. Although we are an independent organization, we have received a lot of help and guidance from Tucson Roller Derby skaters all along the way, and when we aren’t skating we are working hard to help TRD in any way we can. Our two teams, the Green Scream and the Violet Femmes coached by TRD skaters Whiskey Mick and Penny Tencherry, played our first exhibition bout this past July during a regular season TRD bout. With a lot of training (and paper work) under our belts, our teams are ready to start a full season of our own this fall. Skaters from both teams are here in Austin as the Tucson Saddlebrats. A lot of people have worked hard to help us make it here, and we are looking forward to having a blast playing Brat City from our sister league this weekend. Together the Seattle Derby Brats and the Tucson Derby Brats have formed the JFTDA, the Junior Flat Track Derby Association. Other member JFTDA leagues include the Orange County Derby Brats, the LA Derby Brats, and others. There are more “Derby Brats” JFTDA leagues in process all over the country working together to ensure a vital future for Roller Derby.

ENTERTAINMENT SCHEDULE SATURDAY Convention Center First break - Junior Roller Derby Bout (Seattle vs Tucson) Second Break - Junior Roller Derby Bout Third Break - IV Thieves AFTERPARTIES Creekside - DJ and Footage Viewing Lovejoys - Kitty Kitty Bang Bang Burlesque Emo’s - AUSTIN MUSIC SHOWCASE! SUNDAY Convention Center First Break - MURDERBALL GUYS DEMO ( Second Break - MURDERBALL GUYS DEMO! Third Break - Lower Class Brats AFTERPARTIES Jackalope - DJ, Dance Party, Footage Viewing Beerland - Side Show Burlesque Emo’s - AUSTIN MUSIC SHOWCASE!

Satans Cheerleaders


he Satan’s Cheerleaders have given bad girls a good name for over a decade. Sparked and kindled in Austin, Texas, Squad 666 has zealously promoted themselves and other members of the Austin music and performing arts scene. The girls have performed musical theater with Austin Psychobilly band The Flametrick Subs for 12 years this Halloween. The Devil’s Debutantes have a résumé that includes go-go-dancing in variety shows, entertaining at charity events, body-guarding classic horror movie actors, being featured on The Learning and Discovery Channels, and appearing in fetish magazine exposés. This weekend, they proudly cheer on the Texecutioners! They will motivate the masses in a hometown Pep-Rally from HELL as the Texecutioners slaughter their way to the top of the Roller Derby Nationals! “RAH F-ing RAH! HELL F-ing YEAH!”

Also Appearing... Kitty Kitty Bang Bang Burlesque IV Thieves Quad Rugby also known as Murderball

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Roller Derby Trivia Sure, you’re a Flat Track Derby fan. But how much do you really know about the world of Flat Track? 1. Flat Track Derby is a family affair. Can you name the two Texas Rollergirls with siblings in other Flat Track leagues? BONUS: Name the sisters in another state who started a league together. 2. At the first national tournament -- the Dust Devil in Tucson, AZ in February, 2006 -- who was named MVP? 3. Which team “broke” the scoreboard at the 2006 Dust Devil, turning over the score from 199 to 0 and racking up a total score of 208? BONUS: Which team were they playing at the time? 4. Yeeha and Hell, yeah! What was the date of the Texas Rollergirls first Flat Track Derby bout? 5. Let’s go old school. Who is credited for starting Roller Derby back in the 1930s?BONUS: Which hard boiled author, according to legend, helped sketch out the rules? 6. The Women’s Flat Track Derby Association (WFTDA) had its first official meeting in August 2005. Where was that legendary meeting held? 7. Twenty leagues participated in the first WFTDA meeting. How many can you name? 8. Marilyn Monroe was 36-23-36. What are the dimensions of a WFTDA standard Flat Track Derby track? 9.Which two teams played in the first ever inter-state Flat Track Derby bouts? What year? 10. What’s the name of the documentary about the recent Roller Derby revolution? BONUS: Name the filmmakers behind the movie. 11. Reading is sexy. Can you name the two books about Flat Track Derby written by Rollergirls? 12. A rose by any other name would smell as sweet... and a Rollergirl by any other name will still kick your ass. How many names are listed in the International Rollergirl Name Roster? 13. Rice Rocket (Texas Rollergirls) and Snot Rocket (KC Roller Warriors) seem to drink rocket fuel for breakfast. How many names on the registry are versions of “Rocket”? How many variations can you name? 14. Ivanna S. Pankin was the founder of the Arizona Roller Derby and Sin City Rollergirls. How many names on the registry are versions of “Ivanna”? How many variations can you name? 15. How many Flat Track Derby leagues are rolling right freakin’ now? Answers on page 30...

Season starts November 24! NOVEMBER Sat. 24 Bakersfield Fri. 30 Sioux Falls

7:00 11:00am

DECEMBER Sat. 1 Sat. 8 Fri. 14 Sat. 15 Thu. 27 Fri. 28

Colorado Tulsa Colorado Idaho Tulsa Tulsa

7:00 7:00 7:00 7:00 7:00 7:00

JANUARY Fri. 4 Sat. 5 Thu. 10 Sat. 12 Wed. 23 Thu. 24

Rio Grande V. Rio Grande V. Albuquerque Albuquerque Colorado Colorado

7:00 7:00 7:00 7:00 7:00 7:00

FEBRUARY Fri. 1 Fri. 22 Sat. 23 Fri. 29

Utah Des Moines Dakota Ft. Wayne

MARCH Sat. 1 Thu. 20 Fri. 21

Anaheim 7:00 Rio Grande V. 7:00 Rio Grande V. 7:00

APRIL Wed. 2 Fri. 11 Sat. 12

Albuquerque Albuquerque Tulsa

7:00 7:00 7:00 7:00

7:00 7:00 7:00


Tickets start at just $7. For more info, call 512-236-8333 or visit WFTDA Championship Tournament


Trivia Answers: 1. Twice the fun, twice the trouble: Lucille Brawl, Texas Rollergirls & Crackerjack, Mad Rollin’ Dolls; Derringer, Texas Rollergirls & Bonnie Collide, Rat City Rollergirls BONUS: The Donnelly sisters (Head Trauma, Rolls Wilder, Flogging Molly), Minnesota Rollergirls 2. The jammer killer: Eight Track, Texas Rollergirls Texecutioners 3. The current Western Regional Champions, the Rat City Rollergirls, made the hockey scoreboard in Tuscon roll over. Whoop! BONUS: Sin City Rollergirls 4. The Texas Rollergirls officially made their debut at Playland Skate Center on Sunday, April 27, 2003 5. Leo Seltzer was the impresario that got the whole shebang rolling back in the day. BONUS: Damon Runyan was the author who encouraged Leo to put a little sex and violence into skating in circles. The musical Guys And Dolls was based on two of his short stories. 6. Chicago, Illinois, the birthplace of old school Roller Derby. 7. Texas Rollergirls, Dallas Derby Devils, Assassination City Roller Derby, Arizona Roller Derby, Tucson Roller Derby, Mad Rollin’ Dolls, Minnesota Rollergirls, Atlanta Rollergirls, Kansas City Roller Warriors, Detroit Roller Derby, Gotham Girls Roller Derby, Rat City Rollergirls, Providence Roller Derby, Boston Derby Dames, Carolina Rollergirls, Dixie Derby Girls, Windy City Rollers, Rose City Rollers, Rocky Mountain Rollergirls, Big Easy Rollergirls 8. 88 feet X 52 feet 9. Texas Rollergirls versus Arizona Roller Derby’s Tent City Terrors. November 6, 2004. That weekend also included a bout between Tucson Roller Derby and the Texas Rollergirls -- and started the Texas vs. Arizona annual tradition. 10. Hell on Wheels: The True Tale of All-Girl Roller Derby, Texas Style BONUS: Austin filmmakers Bob Ray and Werner Campbell shot footage from day one of the Roller Derby revival. 11. Rollergirl: Totally True Tales From The Track by Melissa “Melicious” Joulwan, and Roller Derby: The History and All-Girl Revival of the Greatest Sport on Wheels by Catherine Mabe 12. A whopping 9,261 (as of August 15, 2007). 13. There are 15 types o’ rockets: Dolly Rocket, Providence Roller Derby; Dr. Rocket, Santa Cruz Rollergirls; Jenny Rocket, Calgary Roller Derby Association; Pixie Rocket, Charm City Roller Girls; Polly Rocket, Gem City Rollergirls; Red Rocket, Naptown Roller Girls; Rice Rocket, Texas Rollergirls; Rocket Bye Baby, Lilac City Rollergirls; Rocket Mean, Rose City Rollers; Rocketgirl, DC Rollergirls; Rockets Redglare, Queen City Roller Girls; Rockett, Denver Roller Girls; Roxy Rockett, Philly Rollergirls; Rue Bea Rockett. AZ Derby Dames; Snot Rocket, KC Roller Warriors 14. Oh, boy! Does she wanna... there are 24: Ivana B. Brutal, Naptown Roller Girls; Ivana B. Sedated, Houston Roller Derby; Ivana Clobbe, Boston Derby Dames; Ivana E. Chabrains, Charm City Roller Girls; Ivana Embalmya, NorCal Roller Girls; Ivana Hercha, Jet City Rollergirls; Ivana Rock, Philly Rollergirls; Ivana Soccer, Slaughter County Roller Vixens; Ivana Tripabitch, Derby City Roller Girls; Ivanna Bruiser, Mississippi Rollergirls; Ivanna Bump Her, Richland County Regulators; Ivanna Decker, Bay Area Derby Girls; Ivanna Destroya, Burning River Roller Girls; Ivanna Hurtem, Tornado Alley Roller Girls; Ivanna Kicksomash, Classic City Rollergirls; Ivanna Nailya, No Coast Derby Girls; Ivanna Riot, Chi*Town Sirens Roller Derby; Ivanna Rumble, Beach City Roller Derby; Ivanna S. Pankin, Sin City Rollergirls; Ivanna Smackdavitch, Brewcity Bruisers; Ivanna Thump, Burning River Roller Girls; Ivanna Vhistle, DC Rollergirls; Ivona Killeau, Denver Roller Dolls; Ivona Skankalova, Lilac City Rollergirls 15. There are 241! And the list keeps on growin’!


“National Pizza Company of the Year”

Five locations - Austin & Round Rock Ph: 512- 4-MANGIA

Texas Shoutouts Dear ANN T. PATHIC, We love you and miss you already. Good luck in Austin! much love, Took Gallagher & The Michigan your R.O.C.K. family Art-o-mat LOVE The Detroit Derby Girls -- YOU ROCK!!!

Go Fisti! Love, Ma & Pa Cuffs

If we’re confused about which team to cheer for, we’ll look for the speed ruffles!

Go Gotham Girls Go! Love, the New York Shock Exchange Best in the West. Now it’s time to show the rest. Go Rat City! ~ Love from your Rabid Rat City Fans

Where Am I?

Thank you KCRW, WCR and CRG for your mentorship and support for ARRG. Now kick some derby ass! - Arch Rival Roller Girls, St. Louis, MO


Good luck Texecutioners! from Sonny, PRP, Dagger,Bloody and all the Texas Rollergirls

Special Texas Shootout thanks to....... AK 40 oz., Apocalippz, Austin Convention Center, Austin Sports Commission, Beth Metal, Bettie Rage, Bloody Mary, Brandon Gonzales, Cheap Trixie, Chip Queso, Crackerjack, Electra Blu, Endless Justin, Houston’s Derby Brothers, Hurt Reynolds, Hydra, Ivanna S. Pankin, Sin City Skates, Justice Feelgood Marshall, Karen and Resurrection Tattoo, Koolaid, Lucille Brawl, Mercy Less, Punkrock Phil , Pussy Velour and Sedonya Face, Quicksilver and Johnny Roast Beef, Roman Johnson, Ryder Down, Shank, Slaughter Melon, Tinkerhell, Tucson Roller Derby, TXRG Hostesses, Val Capone, Vans, WFTDA, Ziv Kruger ... from Texas Rollergirls, skater-owned and operated since 2003. We love ya ‘til it hurts!

WFTDA National Roller Derby Program  

I did all of he layout work and original design of the nationals logo.

WFTDA National Roller Derby Program  

I did all of he layout work and original design of the nationals logo.