Private Suite Magazine Issue 14

Page 22

You know, they say every copy of Super Mario 64 is personalized. I'm sure you've heard them say it, too. Across the internet and thousands of brains inspecting their fuzzy N64-era memories for paranormal oddities, you've heard it. But do you believe it? No, trust me: no one joins the faithful overnight. Personalized game cartridges are the granddaddy of them all: the cloaked and pressurized Marianas Trench beneath the Super Mario 64 Iceberg. This variant of the popular "tip of the iceberg" meme documents Super Mario 64 rumors, creepypastas, and some outright fabrications, but it follows its template by getting more sinister and claustrophobic the deeper you go. Sure, many are aware of "parallel universes" and King Bomb-Omb's dud of a revival, but it's only once you explore the rabbit hole that is the July 29th, 1995 build that your journey down the iceberg grows too momentous—and you eventually find yourself truly believing in Wet-Dry World's negative emotional aura, the insidious Wario Apparition, and the indisputable fact that everyone's Super Mario 64 cartridge contains an intelligent AI that tweaks the game's layout in response to player behavior. After all, have you ever played someone else's copy and felt weirdly unwelcome? I've even heard the game's best speedrunners owe their success to an umbilical symbiosis with the intelligence they've nurtured.

Tip of the Iceberg:

Sinister

Super Mario 64 Soundscapes deliriously...daniel WRITER

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