16807 The Life She Was Given u1:Kensington Publishing Corp.
12.12.2016
18 • Ellen Marie Wiseman
Mother reached blindly for the porch railing again, her face suddenly gray. “Your father was . . .” Julia started trembling. She had never seen Mother like this. “My father was what?” she said. “Tell me.” “He was in a car crash.” Julia’s breath caught. “Is he okay?” Mother gaped at her, shaking her head, as if she couldn’t believe what she was about to say. “No, he’s not okay. He’s dead.” The ground tilted beneath Julia’s feet and her knees nearly buckled. It seemed, for an instant, that she was falling. But then she realized, somehow, she had remained upright. In what sounded like slow motion, she heard herself say again, “What happened?” “He was looking for you,” Mother said. Then her face contorted and changed. The grief in her eyes turned to anger and hate, and her mouth twisted into a sneer. She raised her arms and pounded on Julia’s head and shoulders with bony fists. “It’s your fault!” she screamed. “It’s your fault! It’s your fault!” Julia put her arms up to protect herself, but Mother’s blows slammed into her head and chest and face, even after she knocked her to the ground. The police pulled Mother off, but not before she split Julia’s lip and bruised her cheek and shoulders. That night, Julia stole the tithe money from the canister inside the spice cupboard, ignoring the gaze of Jesus on the decorative tin, then packed a bag and left Blackwood Manor, vowing never to return. There would be no more early curfews and strict rules, no more nightly prayers and weekly confessions, no more locked rooms, no more blame for her father’s drinking. From that day on, she’d be free to do as she pleased. She’d take her future into her own hands. And she’d never let anyone blame her for anything again. Except things hadn’t turned out the way she planned. Sure, freedom was fun at first, taking the bus to Long Island and making friends on the boardwalk, pawning her jewelry and moving into an apartment a mile from the beach with Kelly, a cocktail waitress, and Tom, a veteran from the Korean War. The first few months were lost in a haze of music, parties, beer, and marijuana. Then Kelly moved back home, winter came, the boardwalk closed, and the
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