Kvetch Me if You Can

headlight and taillight flashing like an early ‘90s rave. I see you. I can’t unsee you. I can practically hear you! You don’t need to shine your flashlight in my eyes as I veer through a yard to avoid the neon party-of-one that is you.

BY DAN ROSENBERG

It’s that wonderful time of day on the island: dusk. Or pre-dusk. Not quite dark enough to need your headlights as you drive home or to the store, but dark enough that you might not see that jogger or walker and have to make a last-minute swerve to avoid them. You know the type: the one who looks in the mirror, admires their dusk-colored jacket, pavement-colored vest and twilight-colored jeans and thinks, “I look amazing! It’s time to take my gravel-colored dog out for a walk.”

If this isn’t enough of a kvetch, I’d like to add someone who is almost as annoying: the overly visible walker. The one who wears a reflective jacket, yellow neon pants and hat with a

Speaking of walking in the road, why do so many pedestrians walk down the middle of the road? And why do those who do pick one side or the other not know the rule that you are supposed to walk against traffic? I drive an electric car and I’ve often scared people who don’t realize there’s a vehicle at their heels. While it’s good fun to honk from 6 inches behind and watch you jump out of your shoes, I’d rather that we see each other, give a friendly nod or wave and go on with our days.

On the subject of nods, please acknowledge the fact that I moved out of the way. I just swerved to make sure you had plenty of space to walk. I deserve at least a wave or a nod of acknowledgement for not knocking your fluorescent, ultra-reflective vest with blinking, multi-colored LED fiber optics into the ditch, don’t I?

Since the last time we heard from expert kvetcher, comedian, writer and actor Dan Rosenberg, A Lot has happened. A whole Lot. He just finished filming a sitcom pilot called (you guessed it) “It’s A Lot,” where he plays a used-car salesman with a rock-star dad (played by Rick Springfield). Rosenberg is also a radio host, emcee and author. We said it before and we weren’t wrong: He’s a lot. And we’re his very biggest fans.

FINDING THE EXTRAORDINARY IN THE ORDINARY