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THURSDAY, JUNE 7, 2012
VIEWPOINT
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Monarchy
Queen’s usefullness next to nil ViewFrom TheCheap Seats Michael Booth
God save the queen ’Cause tourists are money And our figurehead Is not what she seems. Who would have thunk it? Hands up all of you who knew the late ’70s English philosophical think tank known as the Sex Pistols were ahead of the curve in their assessment of the House of Windsor. For the past couple of weeks, newscasts and print media have been going ga-ga – if the singer can call herself Lady Gaga, does that make Elizabeth II Queen Gaga? – over the festivities in London to mark the Queen’s 60 years on the English throne. What an achievement. In the face of an arduous life of working up a sweat cutting ribbons, sitting through boring chats with foreign leaders and touring the world in luxury while intermittently raising her right hand in a pseudo wave, Elizabeth II has managed to defy demographics for her
age group and, well, live. Wowsers. Atta girl; let’s break out the national credit card and add a few more zeroes to the total debt so we can mark the occasion in a suitable fashion. And oh, what a show it’s been. There were plenty of public events leading up to the main show this week, which included a flotilla of 1,000-plus boats on the Thames River, enough fireworks to rekindle memories of “The Blitz” in the skies over London and a mega rock concert featuring Paul McCartney, Tom Jones, Elton John and Madness. Stevie Wonder and Will. i.am even showed up and serenaded the monarch with “Happy Birthday” (What? – think about that one). Very cool. I had no idea Liz was a big fan of the bouncy ska riffs of Madness. English officials trot the old girl out for special occasions such as large international events and summer vacations, I mean, Royal Tours, now and again, but today her main role is to provide a speech recapping the events of the previous year and to pose for the currency of assorted Commonwealth nations. In her lifetime, Elizabeth II has seen the institution
of the monarchy evolve from wartime inspiration to quaint nostalgia to paparazzi fodder to its current state of irrelevance. She remains an endearing figurehead for many who can recall the early stages of her “reign,” but for the rest of us, she is kind of a strange throwback that doesn’t really fit in the current global political spectrum. Betty Windsor and her brood, as CKNW’s Frosty Forst aptly referred to the royals, are better known for their dubious contributions to the celebrity industrial complex than any meaningful impact on current society in England or the Commonwealth. Growing up in the late ’60s and ’70s, I recall being required to learn the lyrics to “God Save the Queen” as part of becoming a member of Cubs and Scouts. Even at that age, I didn’t understand why I, as a Canadian kid, needed to know the words
to another country’s anthem. The Treaty of Westminster in 1931 cut the shackles of British authority and gave Canada the right to make its own decisions as an independent nation. And yet here we are, more than 80 years later, still “oohing” and “ahhing” at television screens as the latest royal pageantry unfolds in England. To make matter worse, while Britain has no official influence over this country, we still stubbornly cling to the apron strings in the form of the Governor General. The queen’s official representative in Canada, the GG is merely a walking anachronism whose job, apparently, is to save the House of Windsor the travel costs of jetting to the former colonies for ribbon cutting ceremonies. The GG is also the person who has been endowed with
the token power of being able to dissolve Parliament and call elections, but as we can see by the current rampant arrogance and ethical abuses of the Tories and Stephen Harper, that power is more amusing than any form of reality you can access with over-the-counter medications. Quick – name the current Governor General. Nuff said. Of course this kind of pseudo-power does not come cheap. Each year Canadian taxpayers shell out millions of dollars to maintain the royal illusion on this side of the Atlantic. At a time when thousands of Canadians are losing their jobs due to federal budget cutbacks, this week we learned we are spending $2.5 million to redo the front yard of Gov. Gen. David Johnston’s (if you guessed him, you win!) official residence in Ottawa, Rideau Hall.
The time has long since passed when the institution of royalty has been relevant in this country. Most Canadians today have no links to Great Britain and Queen Elizabeth sightings in this country are as frequent as those of Sasquatch and the tooth fairy – you are amazed if you are lucky to see it, but it really doesn’t mean anything. Perhaps Betty Windsor’s Diamond Jubilee should serve as a jumping off point for Canadians to reassess the role of the Governor General in the Canadian political picture. Oh, but don’t take away the Victoria Day holiday each May. That’s one example of an homage to the institution of monarchy that every Canadian can get behind. Michael Booth can be reached at mbooth@ thenownewspaper.com
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