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y INITIAL urge is to tell everybody and his redheaded brother what's the matter with the fraternity and how to remedy it, of course. But with characteristic will-power, the same type which I exercise at ~~solution-making time each year, there shall be a tmtt of not more than twenty- no more, no less- references to glaring ailments and equally sensational cures. Are you ready, Doctor? Then give her the gas! Now, take this Efficiency Rating racket for instance. The Questionnaire Department of the Q11arterly Kappsule has just finished getting off a letter to every undergraduate asking for their preferences in the matter of just what shall be used as a basis for judging chapters. Unfortunately, there was no return address placed on the envelopes and our mailing clerk failed to stamp the letters before posting them and-but never mind, we know what the answers wou ld have been anyway. Understand, now, we think the requirements of the Efficiency Rating plan are splendid, but in order to give some of those brothers at the foot of the ladder (and several who haven't even gotten their foot on the ladder yet) a chance to improve their standing, Pi KappSffles and its mammoth followingboth of them-recommend a few new planks, to wit and why not: . For properly snubbing the college widow at a major prom · · . . . . . ....... .. . . ...... . ...... .. ....... 10 points For an enforced rule allowing no snorers in the dorm .. · ... ... . . .... . ... ... . . ........ . ........ 100 points For having a brother who invites two or more skirts up for the week-end, and they all go home just '' karazy about the boys at Siwash" ...... . . a medal and 50 points For every stripped-down lizzie that will run . .. . .. 50 points For every brother that "Euc" Reeves doesn't know by his first name . . . . ........... . ...... ... . minus 10 points For each name on the chapter's visitor's register that is legible . ..... . ... .. ... . . . . . . .. .. ........ . 500 points For any two alarm clocks in the dorm exactly alike .. 60 points For sending in a monthly chapter report with every item completely filled in or answered .. . .. . .. . ........ . · · ... ... ....... . First place without further argument For each brother who can awaken at 7:47, dress, eat breakfast, read the Morning Bugle, and make an "eight o'clock" four blocks away .. ... . . ..... .. A fireman's hat For reporting any alumnus who doesn't eventually deliver the following : "Well, fellows, that's a good one, but 1'11 never forget the time back in Umpty-seven when Bill Goofus and I were rooming in Tanglefoot Halletc., etc." .. ... . . 3 points (there will be plenty of these) For reading all the way through Pi Kappsules without feeling like you had taken one .. . . 1000 points to you, sir!




CANADIAN chapter of Delta Kappa Epsilon has initiated an international inter-chapter golf tournament that has prospects of becoming established as a custom. The chapter originating the idea has offered a handsome cup for the winners of the competibion.


Dr. Francis Shepardson, Beta Theta Pi, after many years as editor of the fraternity magazine, has retired to devote his time mainly to his position as national president. He was recently elected president of the College Fraternity Editors' Association. Phi Beta Kappa has discontinued the publishing of The Phi Beta Kappa Key and replaced it with The American Scholar. a periodical designed not only for the members of the organization but for all who have scholarly interests. Among the objectives of the magazine are the following: The promotion of liberal scholarship; provision of a medium for scholars and all persons interested in intellectual pursuits, higher learning, and the cu ltural development of America; a synthesis of the arts and sciences essential to liberal education and a guiding phi losophy of life; an esprit de corps among the educated. It will consist of at least 128 pages, seven by ten inches, about 100 of which w ill be devoted to general articles and poems, the remainder to news from the realm of scholarship. William A. Shimer, secretary of Phi Beta Kappa, will edit the publication. Subscription price is $2 a year. It may be ordered through the central office of the fraternity, 145 West 55th Street, New York City. Via The Phi Gamma Delta we learn that President Hoover was almost a fraternity man. According to the account in the above periodical, Hoover was pledged to S.A.E. at Stanford but his intimate friends among the non-fraternity group chided him for deserting them and eventually caused him to ask for his release. The Pttrple, Green and Gold of Lambda Chi Alpha has become The Cross and Crescent. No other change is contemplated. This excellent magazine is issued seven times a year.

Sigma Phi Epsilon goes to Chattanooga for their next national gatheri ng. Judge James H. Wilkerson, who attained headline prominence in his conduct of the trial of "AI" Capone, is a member of Phi Delta Theta.



But what torments oF pain you endured "Some of your ills you have cured, from evils that never arrived." ..