TIM E F O R YO U
Stand on My Shoulders, Sisters IS THIS TALE FAMILIAR TO YOU AS A FEMALE PHYSICIAN?
A
Wri t t en by Dr. Ro by n A l l ey-H a y
fter worrying and worrying, not knowing what to do with all that worry, I caused myself double suffering by making myself wrong and inf licting various types of self-punishment for falling short of perfection. Only now, when I look back twenty years, can I see, really, how brave and determined I had to be to: First, get into medical school; second, do a residency in a competitive specialty; third, survive said residency; fourth, I had four children during my education and training, and lastly, not lose my mind a whole lot earlier than I eventually did! I now appreciate how resilient I had to be to get out of bed every morning to take more unpleasantness and soul crushing aggressions. In fact, I would really, really like an apology for the mistreatment from several male professors and attendings. I still have words (in my imagination) with my residency director and he passed away 1 4 | J U LY / AU G U S T 2020
several years ago! I would like him to understand: It wasn’t his fault per se that he was ignorant of inequity from the comfort of his maleness. We (as in colloquial “we”) have all learned how blind we can be to inequities that exist as we judge from relative safety and comfort. Once noticed, there is a responsibility to apologize and make it right, and then use that privilege for the highest good. Damn you, Dr. Patriarch Program Director, you’ll never be able to realize your ignorance, apologize, or work to effect change, or make it up to me for the career lost to burnout (and very nearly suicide). You might actually need what I have learned from the experience of being female in a patriarchal, hierarchical male world; learn what I know as a woman, and let me educate you on my scholastic expertise in topics of being human. You might want to learn higher level communication skills and be facile at positive relat-
ing and bring awareness to the dynamic of power differentials. A tsunami is on the horizon – a tsunami of empowered women in medicine. Why do women in medicine STILL have to worry so much? It seems like there is so far to go! I sometimes forget how rapid change has occurred at significant times in history. Birth control pills were only legalized for married women in 1965 and it took an act of the Supreme Court to make contraception legal for unmarried women in 1972. 1972! Thank goodness I was not born ten years earlier! That was not that long ago. It follows that women were criminals for having sex outside of procreation. Unbelievable. (Don’t get me started on the continued fight for women’s reproductive rights!) I can see now that I took those rights for granted and forgot how hard fought those rights were. We stand on the shoulders of women who fought, protested, boycotted (including their marital bed), and spoke out to
