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30 YEARS OF INDEPENDENT JOURNALISM

April 14 - April 20, 2011 #1350 |

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ARTS | Church and stage

NEWS | Bag vendor ouster? ✚ FOOD | Beefy 943


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Fairmount Park, Philadelphia | MannCenter.org

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MARCH 4 – MAY 30, 2011

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contents Hello, I’m Geeky McGeekleson

Naked City ...................................................................................6 Cover Story ..............................................................................13 The Agenda ..............................................................................30 Food & Drink ...........................................................................38 Cover objeCts FabriCated by lewis Colburn and the nextFab studio team Cover PhotograPhs by neal santos Photo Collage by evan m. loPez


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naked

the thebellcurve CP’s Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[0]

Center City’s Conservation Center for Art begins to preserve the tattoo work of Norman “Sailor Jerry” Collins.Those interested in assisting this artistic endeavor will please PUT THE LOTION ON ITS SKIN.

[ -1 ]

AGeorgiacompanybuysTastyBakingCo. “There’s gonna be some changes round these parts,” says CEO Colonel David “Pappy”Davis.“Starting now,Chocolate Juniors may no longer lie down with Vanilla Lover Cupcakes,and all fruit pies will be sent off for reprogramming.”

[ +1 ]

Police commissioner Charles Ramsey says the city ought to put police officers in schools.“At least until like sixth grade. Then they can be cops again.”

[ -? ! ]

The firefighters union endorses Milton Streetformayor.“Better send theseguys, too,” says Ramsey.

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[ -3 ]

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A sidewalk improvement project to install handicapped-accessible ramps is halted amid concerns that it could harm Society Hill’s historic authenticity.“We don’t want to be insensitive,”says block captain Gladys “Cookie” Pemberton. “We’re just pointing out that in colonial times,the few cripples who weren’t euthanized at birth would surely have been rotting in a sanitarium, not rolling around on some devilish torso-wagon to be looked upon by the good people of our greene country towne. Amen.”

[0]

A Manayunk neighborhood group votes in favor of a new beer distributor on Main Street.According to the official minutes: 41 members voted “Woo,” six voted “Hells yeah”and two voted“Nah,brah,I really have to study.I’m basically failing English Comp right now.”

[ -4 ]

In 2011,the state plans to fix 45 percent fewer bridges than it did last year. And the rest will take care of themselves.

[ +2 ]

An exhibit honoring pigeons is installed outside the University of the Arts.“Hey, thanks. Real good likeness. Really captures our magnificence and splendor,” says Dwight “Chirpsy” Mercier, Mayor of the Pigeons.“Now if you’ll excuse me, I am late to poop on some joggers.”

This week’s total: -5 | Last week’s total: 1

Artsy cArt: John Banks runs his Italian Market business his way. neal santos

[ fixtures ]

Very Strong BagS A ramshackle vendor might be part of the Italian Market’s tradition, but will he survive its drive to “clean up”? By Holly Otterbein

A

mong the various iconic symbols of philadelphia’s italian Market — the imposing mural of former police chief and mayor Frank rizzo; the great chariot wheels of cheese hanging in the windows of the Di Bruno Bros. grocery — John Banks is probably among the lesser known. On the other hand, he’s probably one of the most colorful. Nearly every day for the past 20 years (yes, this year marks his 20th anniversary, he says), Banks has hawked 50-cent shopping bags and delivered groceries to nearby and elderly residents ($2 to $3 per delivery) from his homemade storefront — a shopping cart — developing in the process his own ramshackle brand. There’s the uniform: hat, boots, cargo pants and a pair of sunglasses that he never, ever removes. and then, attracting what must be hundreds of photographers, pro and amateur alike, over the years, his carts. He’s “taken to advertising” on them, he explains mildly: Each is plastered from top to bottom with Banks’ handmade signs, which he creates with black marker in a style that is instantly recognizable and often beautiful: “The Name for Stress-Free Grocery Delivery Since 1991,” reads one. “a Very Strong Bag!” reads another. Others are more contemplative: “i love You Mom!”; “May the Work That i Do Speak For Me.”

“That’s how i beat my competition. i’m an artist!” says Banks, who adds, “i didn’t go to school for art; i learned from my mother.” and then there’s the broadcast: affixed to the cart is a cottoncandy-pink-accented Sharp stereo, from which Banks blasts his latest mix tapes, Jackson 5 on a recent visit. Banks broadcasts his business as well by voice, merrily shouting made-up slogans as shoppers walk past. He’s iconic enough, apparently, to have made it into a scene in Rocky V. “i didn’t want to be in Rocky V, but i’m in Rocky V,” he explains. But not everyone in the italian Market finds Banks so charming; for some longtimers, in fact, he’s sybolic of an element in the market they’d rather not see — and the recent push by organizers to “clean up” the Market could conceivably send him packing. “people think the italian Market is dirty,” says Cookie Ciliberti, secretary of the South 9th Street Business Men’s association, as she stands only a few paces from where barrel fires and garbage regularly line the streets. “We’re trying to change.” Some members of the South 9th Street Business Men’s association want Banks to clean up his act aSap or leave the corridor. “i tried to kill him twice this week!” Ciliberti bemoans. She claims that Banks “leaves his trash everywhere” (Banks denies this) and begrudges his use of the Market’s port-a-potty, which

Some members of the Business Association want Banks to leave the corridor.

>>> continued on page 9


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[ a million stories ]

Care to reviSe your Statement?

Safety’S in the numberS

But Jen Boulanger of allentown Women’s Center argues that the state should not make abortion less accessible to the poor: “Women were going to Gosnell because it seemed more affordable.”

last week, the pennsylvania House Gaming Oversight Committee passed, just barely, a bill to the House floor that would require casinos to mail monthly “expense” (or “loss”) statements to all players who use “rewards” cards. The bill was sponsored by rep. paul Clymer (r-Bucks), a passionate opponent of slot machines who believes such statements might alert gamblers (or their families) to self-destructive behavior. For more than five years, Clymer has tried to pass the bill through the Gaming Oversight Committee; the vote this time was 14-11, with all “yea” votes cast by House republicans. in related (and, until now, unpublished) news, it appears that a large number of players visit casinos not once in a while, nor once a month, nor once a week, but up to four or five times a week — just slightly less often than many people go to work. During the pennsylvania Gaming Congress & Mid-atlantic racing Forum held at the loews philadelphia last month, ron Baumann, general manager of Harrah’s Chester Casino, said the customers in his database visited an average of 4.5 times a week. robert J. DeSalvio, president of Sands Casino resort in Bethlehem, acknowledged similar if slightly lower numbers. Wendy Hamilton, general manager of SugarHouse Casino here in philly, said that a “large number” of her casino’s customers came “three, four, five times a week.” That would presumably be one scary-looking monthly expense statement, a point that even the casinos concede. in a recent committee hearing, Sands’ DeSalvio told rep. Clymer that such a statement “sorta reminds [problem gamblers] that they had a loss and it might actually encourage them to try and chase the money.” The basis of this claim? “i have a feeling,” he said, but “i can’t quite pinpoint the research.”

— holly otterbein

— isaiah thompson

according to the grand jury report charging philadelphia abortion doctor Kermit Gosnell with the murder of one woman and seven babies, the state was partially to blame for not having inspected his clinic since 1993 “for political reasons.” in light of these findings, state rep. Matt Baker (r-Wellsboro) introduced a bill that he says would protect women by putting an end to the Department of Health’s “gross lack of oversight” by holding abortion clinics to the same safety standards as outpatient surgery centers. The House Health Committee voted in favor of it on Monday. But women’s advocates say that the bill actually makes abortion less safe. “The problem that Gosnell exposed is that regulations were spottily and inadequately enforced,” not that the state needed new regulations, says Sue Frietsche of the Women’s law project. She argues that the bill expands staffing and construction requirements without reason, and will raise the cost of an abortion by as much as $1,000. This, in turn, says Frietsche, will shut down safe clinics and “force women to seek care in other states or from marginal or illegal practitioners.” Baker counters that the grand jury report itself recommends holding abortion clinics to the same standards as outpatient surgery centers. “aren’t women deserving of enhanced safety?” asks Baker. “aren’t they worth the extra money?”

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electionear Get vote-smart here

Sale away ➤ Last week, some 2,000 Philadelphia houses

➤ It turns out that 8th Council District candi­

“Metal” of Philly’s Repstyle Crew performing suicides in Rittenhouse Square ahd Child, ahdChild.Com

date Cindy Bass’ campaign has employed two people close to former political corruption scandals. Last week, it came out during an interview with Bass opponent Robin Tasco by G­Town Radio’s Ed Feldman that Bass’ campaign had hired Steven Vaughn, a former aide to Councilwoman Donna Reed Miller. Vaughn pleaded guilty in 2005 in a pay­ to­play scandal. Tasco, in the same show, claimed that Vaughn tried to bribe her to drop out. Then, City Paper found that Bass’ campaign had hired Sabir Hameen, who’s lived with Theresa Pinkett, another former Miller aide who pleaded guilty to bribery — suggesting to some that Bass is not the political outsider they want. Bass spokesman Joe Corrigan calls this news “a distraction.” He says that in a city with “300,000 convicted felons,” it’s important to involve them — and those close to them. “Part of Cindy’s platform is giving people a second chance,” says Corrigan. — Holly Otterbein (electionear@citypaper.net)

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went up for auction in a sheriff’s sale program that sheriff candidate John Kromer describes as “one of the most opaque processes you can imagine.” According to Kromer, a former director of housing under Mayor Ed Rendell, the way houses are auc­ tioned off is “a mystery to the uninitiated,” in which parcel numbers — not addresses — are rattled off and only insiders can navigate the proceedings. “Meanwhile, there are some people in the room who will sell you information. … The result is you have to pay somebody or call an elected official.” Kromer, along with Mayor Michael Nutter, thinks this all will be made more transparent only if the sheriff’s office is consolidated as a city department, instead of an independently elected office. Thus Kromer is campaigning to be the “Last Sheriff” in order to abolish the office; and Nutter recently wrangled out a Memorandum of Understanding with Acting Sheriff Barbara Deeley that gives the city temporary control of the sheriff’s financial accounts, after an audit by City Controller Alan But­ kovitz uncovered questional financial practices. But Democratic machine favorite state Rep. Jewell Williams disagrees that the sheriff should be folded into the city — and, according to Kromer campaign manager Dave Zega, told a recent ward meeting that he would not renew the MOU with the city. Williams campaign manager Harriet Lessy denies that, saying that Williams simply wants to wait and see how the current agreement works out. — Isaiah Thompson

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From our readers

WASTE NOT A post on our news blog, The Naked City, reported on the cleanup efforts along the Kensington section of the dangerous and neglected Conrail railroad tracks [“Neighbors, city and Conrail take first steps to clean up Kensington ‘Wasteland,’” Isaiah Thompson, April 4]. Commenter p-diddy wondered, “Seriously, how much money does it cost to replace a section of chain link fence every 50 years? The citizens are doing their part. Conrail needs to fulfill its responsibility here.” But a commenter with the moniker WillieNelson had a correction: “Conrail is not a federal entity anymore. It’s half owned by CSX and [half by] Norfolk Southern.”

GUT REACTION And finally, our “Meal Ticket” food blog occasionally singles out a dish that people should seek out. In a bold move, Drew Lazor recommended Opa’s version of a Greek delicacy involving — ready? — lamb sweetbreads, liver and heart bound by lamb intestines [“EAT THIS IMMEDIATELY: Kokoretsi at Opa,” April 5]. This suggestion seemed to cause commenter JulieC some gustatory anguish: “I’m simultaneously intrigued and filled with despair. I love sweetbreads and liver, but it’s the ‘bound by lamb intestines’ that has me squealing in my cubicle. Still … I’d try it.” That’s how we like our readers: brave.

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GROUP PICTURE Our coverage of the Philadelphia International Festival of the Arts included a feature about J.J. Tiziou, whose series of photographs of dancing Philadelphians is being projected onto the Kimmel Center’s façade during PIFA and will also adorn a parking garage at the airport [“Body Moving,” John Vettese, April 7]. Tiziou himself commented on the story: “It’s worth noting that the projection installation is more than just a slideshow — it features not just stills and stop-motion animations, but also lots of great video by Ellen Reynolds, Nicole Ward and Cait Davis, which was beautifully edited together by Ellen Reynolds. The projection logistics were pulled together by Tobin Rothlein of Miro Dance Theatre’s MLab. I keep getting a lot of the attention, but I definitely couldn’t have pulled this off on my own.” Kudos to Tiziou for giving props to his partners.

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Mail letters to Feedback, City Paper, 123 Chestnut St., 3rd Floor, Phila., PA 19106. Fax us at 215-599-0634, e-mail editorial@citypaper.net or comment online at citypaper.net. Submissions may be edited for clarity and space.

 Very Strong Bags <<< continued from page 6

“The Italian market is a soap opera, and I know soap operas. I used to watch All My Children.”

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she emphasizes is “for customers” — all of which, she says, works against the association’s attempt to re-brand itself. The country’s oldest, continuous open-air market has acquired Facebook and Twitter accounts, “with an iPhone app on the way!” boasts Ciliberti. The Italian Market is having a bit of an identity crisis, you might say. And Banks is part of that crisis. Domenick Crimi, general manager of Cappuccio’s Meats and a director of the business association, is sympathetic to Banks: “He’s got a good heart. My mom’s religious, she prays with him.” But Crimi says that the city is pressuring the Italian Market to “get organized,” and Banks isn’t one to play by the rules when it comes to things like licensing. (By city ordinance, all street vendors must have a license, but many don’t.) “He doesn’t really listen,” Crimi says of Banks, adding that the vendor is nonetheless part of a long tradition: “Ninth Street has always been a seat-of-your-pants type of thing.” “We’re definitely pro bag guy,” says Carla Rose, whose family owns Molly’s Café and Bookstore.

She says Banks is integral to the Italian Market’s image, and she’d miss him dearly if he was gone: “Every morning you wake up to all the different catch phrases: ‘Fish!’ ‘Two dollars a pound!’ It just wouldn’t be the same without ‘A dollar a bag!’” Banks, for his part, rejects the characterization of his business as “dirty,” and he dismisses such attacks as “gossip.” “The Italian Market is a soap opera,” he counters, “and I know soap operas. I used to watch All My Children.” Critics may be “jealous,” he added one recent evening, but he’d rather not talk about the fuss. Nearly finished after a long day at the Market, Banks was resting on a fold-out chair he’d brought and taking in a nice sunset. Shuffling through his tapes, a thought occurred to him — a gentle jab at his critics. “The only reason I’m still here tonight,” he mused, “is to wait for the trash truck to come!” (holly.otterbein@citypaper.net)




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● About the Cover Our cover image features three objects designed through a collaboration between CP’s design staff and NextFab president Evan Malone and manager Lewis Colburn, and then fabricated at NextFab. The word “the” is spelled out with illuminated 17-segment displays. The word “science” was printed on a Z Corp. 3-D printer, with the color pattern derived from a stress analysis showing the areas that would be subject to the most stress if the word were compressed. The word “issue” was laser-cut from black acrylic, with back-lit white acrylic behind it, and framed in a walnut box.

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Evan Malone’s NextFab has attracted hobbyists, artists and designers. ● ● ● BY NEAL SANTOS

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cards. She’s also taken advantage of their camera and lighting kit to photograph her work for a portfolio. Malone — who as a graduate student at Cornell was involved in developing a 3-D printer — found the inspiration for NextFab in the small-scale manufacturing setups, called Fab Labs, developed by MIT professor Neil Gershenfeld to give underprivileged communities the ability to create things they need. Using funding from the National Science Foundation, there are now about 60 Fab Labs in 18 countries, with the first ones in 2002 going to places such as rural India and Costa Rica. “It’s the power of just providing access” to technology, says Malone. Besides the membership aspect, NextFab provides contract services for product development, and it partners with the University City Science Center’s Breadboard project to do education and community outreach in technology and arts. Recently, high school students from the West Philly EVX Team went to NextFab to 3-D-scan a car transmission. Independent artist and designer Sharif Pendleton joined NextFab less than a week after it opened in January 2010. He found out about it “after Googling some crazy combination of words” that included Philadelphia, laser and crafts.

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EVAN MALONE PLAYED with a lot of Legos as a kid. Maybe that’s what led him to founding NextFab Studio, a workshop space in West Philly that serves as a high-tech clubhouse for artists, designers, computer geeks, 3-D animators, inventors and engineering buffs. NextFab bills itself as a “gym for innovators.” At any given moment, NextFab members who’ve paid their $100 monthly fee and gone through the training sessions are busy designing, building and generally tinkering away the hours on some impressive, really high-tech equipment. Want to create a computer model of an object? Use their 3-D scanner. Want to go in the other direction and turn a digital facsimile into an actual hold-in-your-hand object? The computer-controlled milling machine can carve it out for you, or one of the wow-cool 3-D printers can build it for you layer by layer. NextFab has a gallery-quality reproduction printer (which uses “ridiculously expensive ink,” Malone notes), a digital embroidery/sewing machine and an injection-molding machine that makes small plastic doodads (“That’s Walmart in a nutshell,” Malone observes dryly). There’s a room full of loud contraptions that will cut, weld, engrave and poke holes in metal, and make all kinds of other materials, from felt to wood, bend to your creative will. NextFab’s four rooms can be a tight squeeze, but this is only a partial list of the techy tools there. Robert Baruch, a software architect for Verizon, is at NextFab almost every weekend working on his pet project — a computer with no electronic components and powered by a steam engine. “So there’s this steam-punk aspect to it,” he says. All the other workshops he’d found in the city were just empty spaces for rent. But NextFab “had all the equipment,” he notes. “I never really had the opportunity to build something complex because places like this didn’t exist.” But why a mechanical computer? “It’s a hobby,” Baruch says with a grin. “It makes me happy. I come here to exercise a different type of creativity.” NextFab isn’t just for hobbyists. “My vision for this place was for inventors to be able to go from a concept to an aesthetically pleasing product that they could show people,” explains Malone. Impressed by the place’s “tremendous resources,” Joyce Lee, a recent Penn graduate, joined NextFab a month ago. She’s been using the computer-controlled laser cutter to make custom buttons, the digital embroidery/sewing machine for an upcycling clothing project, and both machines to make novelty calling

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Inventors and artists play with high-tech toys at NextFab’s West Philly nerd gym. ● ● ● BY THERESA EVERLINE

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Dream Machines

“Most of the projects I sell have actually been produced at NextFab or have some component that was created at NextFab,” says Pendleton. For example, his acrylic jewelry and coasters were laser-cut there, and his packaging labels were printed there. Lately he’s been testing how the laser engraver works on various types of materials for a series of monogrammed coasters. “You design differently once you learn the different tolerances of the machine,” he says, “and once you learn how to not set things on fire.” (theresa.everline@citypaper.net)


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Bot Pursuit Tech Week Picks

Central High’s Robolancers set their sights on a national title. ● ● ● BY SHAUN BRADY Philly Robotics Expo, Thu., April 28, 2-8 p.m., Drexel University Recreation Center, 3301 Market St., 215-571-3777, robolancers.com/expo.

Reservations are required for many events; for more information, visit phillytechweek.com.

● ● ● BY SHAUN BRADY

OUR COMING ROBOT overlords don’t appear too impressive at this point. The little white bot scampering around the Central High School faculty lounge looks like HAL 9000’s yipping lap dog, and has a clumsy habit of toppling the two-by-fours meant to pen it in. Still: The little guy was crafted by high school students with limited resources, under a competition deadline. Don’t get too comfortable with life outside the Matrix. It’s a busy time for the Central High Robolancers, the school’s competitive robot-design team. Downstairs in the cramped and cluttered physics lab, a group of students are packing up for that weekend’s FIRST (For Inspiration and Recognition of Science and Technology) Robotics Competition regional tournament; up here in the lounge, drivers are putting their robot through its paces via a glorified PlayStation controller, preparing for this weekend’s BEST (Boosting Engineering, Science, and Technology) World Championship in Orlando. “The kids into robotics are pretty nerdy kids in a pretty nerdy school,” says their teacher/coach Daniel Ueda with obvious nerdy affection. “But they’re all really comfortable with it because they get to do a lot of things that are cool.” Those cool things include traveling for robotics shows, which Ueda likens to “the most insane rock concert, with party music playing, people dancing and then robots competing.” The trip to Orlando for the world championship is a first for the team. They placed in the top eight at the regionals in Alabama last November, and are honing their robot, which has to haul a trailer, pick up orange cones and place them in holes (geniuses-in-training or not, these are still high school kids, so “getting the tip into the hole” still earns a giggle every time), and lift golf balls and plastic eggs, distinguishing between eggs containing magnets versus marbles. The 11-year-old program, which encompasses the Robolancers club and an engineering and robotics class and which competes in a third, underwater robot competition, is important, Ueda says, because it “gives students a lot of hands-on experience. ... They learn about problem-solving in ways that are way more intense than you do in a classroom.” Since he came into the program two years ago, Ueda has seen students earn scholarships and go on to study mechanical engineering at the college level, especially at Drexel, where several former students return as mentors to the current Central team. What’s particularly impressive about the Robolancers’ successes is that they’re dealing with

obstacles typical of an urban school. Where more affluent schools’ robotics teams do much of their work on Saturdays, Central can’t afford to open its doors on the weekends, limiting the program to after school. But students’ SEPTA TransPasses run out at 7 p.m., and many parents don’t want their children staying in the neighborhood even that late. Ueda sometimes makes up for it by bringing students and robots to his house on the occasional Saturday morning. The BEST competition is a relatively level playing field, requiring bots constructed out of a supplied kit. But the FIRST competition sets only a price limit — and doesn’t count equipment donated to the team. That translates into an advantage for suburban teams, but Ueda hopes to make up ground via the first annual Robotics Expo, to be held on April 28 at Drexel, hosted by Central. The event, free to the public, will raise funds not only for the Robolancers but for the sponsorship of a new Philly robotics team. Companies, including Solid Works, Boeing and Texas Instruments, will sponsor display booths, while area high schools and colleges will give demonstrations. “The Expo is our chance to show off what Philly can do and engage the community, try to get people involved and interested in robotics. We also want to inspire other schools to pick up the program. We’re trying to show kids how cool science can be.” (s_brady@citypaper.net)

OPENDATAPHILLY.ORG UNVEILING: City Hall’s

notoriously sunshine-averse proceedings could probably use a local WikiLeaks. Software firm Azavea has assembled the next-best thing, an integrated database centralizing info from local government agencies, nonprofit organizations and academic institutions. Mon., April 25, noon, free, WHYY, Sixth and Race streets. JUNTO: RETHINKING SHELTER: No one’s quite

figured out how to live completely in the virtual world (when you’re done flying around Second Life, there’s still a very real pile of laundry and take-out containers stinking up the joint), but technology is providing new ways to deal with housing in the real world. Add some new mashup words to your vocabulary with this discussion of cohousing and technomads. Mon., April 25, 6 p.m., free, P’unk Ave., 1168 E. Passyunk Ave. OFFICE SPACE PRINTER SMASH: Tech Week is

full of fascinating discussions and cutting-edge information, but at the end of the day it’s still fun to smash shit. So whether you share the name of an overwrought adult contemporary pop star or not, show up and take out some of your day-job aggressions. Tue., April 26, 6 p.m., free, Nonprofit Technology Resources, 1524 Brandywine St. THE FUTURE OF MUSIC: True, our grandkids are

going to roll their eyes when we wax nostalgic about “record stores,” but they’ll still be listening to something, somehow, that we can yell at them to turn down. Tech-friendly musician RJD2 and two. one.five mag publisher Tayyib Smith make their predictions about what form that may take. Wed., April 27, 6:30 p.m., free, Arts Bank, 601 S. Broad St. CHIP MUSIC SHOWCASE: Kids growing up with

a dozen stations on their Grand Theft Auto radio dial don’t know what it was like to have the minimal soundtracks of old 8-bit games stuck in your head as a side effect of endless hours of princess rescuing. 8static and Third Generation present a line-up of musicians who turn those limitations into an art form, spinning nerd-rock epics from gutted and reconfigured Game Boys. Thu., April 28, 7:30 p.m., $5-$8, PhilaMOCA, 531 N. 12th St. GREEN TECH SHOWCASE: Planting a tree is so

Daniel Ueda and his students are competing for a world title this weekend. ● ● ● BY MARK STEHLE

analog. Celebrate Arbor Day the new-fashioned way as five local groups show off the latest in eco-friendly innovations. Fri., April 29, noon, free, WHYY, Sixth and Race streets.


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For Science! The Philadelphia Science Festival runs April 15-28. For more information, visit philasciencefestival.org. ● ● ●

Science Carnival Any good festival deserves a lavish opening gala. For the Philadelphia Science Festival, it’s the Science Carnival on the Parkway. All day long, exhibitors and vendors will show off their stuff, with plenty of hands-on activities for scientists of all ages. Some of the 80-plus goings-on include a demonstration of Nikola Tesla’s fantastical contraptions, journeys into the microscopic world through nanotechnology, advice on how to calculate (and reduce) your carbon footprint, learning the role the nose plays in tasting food and more. Representatives from local schools, museums, laboratories and think-tanks will bring their finest and most eclectic offerings to this microcosm of the monthlong celebration. —Eric Schuman ● ● ● Sat., April 16, 10 a.m.-5 p.m., free, Logan Circle, 19th Street and Benjamin Franklin Parkway.

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● ● ● Sun., April 17, 2 p.m., $5, University of Pennsylvania Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology, 3260 South St.

Science Quizzo Once a month, the drunken brainiacs of Science on Tap like to get together at National Mechanics to partake of their two favorite pastimes. But you have to wonder how they’ll fare when the pressure’s on, as at this Monday’s science trivia throwdown concocted by Robert Hicks, Ph.D. — director of the Mütter Museum. Actual scientists are welcome. Up to six players per team. Worst team goes home with Hicks in a pickle jar. —Patrick Rapa ● ● ● Mon., April 18, 6 p.m., free, National Mechanics, 22 S. Third St.

Packing for Mars

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Chinese authorities until weeks after its opening and removed again weeks later. Present-day politics are almost enough to make one yearn for the relative ease of ancient curses and Karloffian monsters. —Shaun Brady

If you’re not having fun with astronomy, it’s possible you’re doing it wrong. (Or you’re doing it really hardcore. So much horrible, horrible math.) Derrick Pitts, chief astronomer at the Franklin Institute, always makes space look interesting. Dude’s always on the radio and TV telling us the best times to look up. Author Mary Roach, meanwhile, made space exploration look kinda nutty in her book Packing for Mars. The logistics of astronaut sex, zero-G barfing, chimps (allegedly) masturbating — she has a blast airing out NASA’s, and every earthen space agency’s, dirty laundry. This Pitts/Roach show just might be the most engaging space nerd double bill in the universe. —Patrick Rapa

Here on Earth Australian activist-author Tim Flannery’s been called a “prophet of doom,” but that makes it sound like he’s pulling his dire predictions out of his ass. Not so. He’s a bona fide mammalogist (discovered some 60 species) and paleontologist and the chairman of the Copenhagen Climate Council. So when he describes the specific horrors of a wrecked Earth — slimy, sulfurous, greenish-purple oceans full of bacteria; dwindling fresh water; soil so devoid of nutrients, nothing will grow — we should probably pay attention. Get ready for an illuminating, horrifying lecture, followed by a book signing. —Patrick Rapa

● ● ● Sat., April 16, 2 p.m., free, reservations required, Franklin Institute, 222 N. 20th St.

● ● ● Tue., April 19, 6:30 p.m., free, reservations required, Academy of Natural Sciences, 1900 Ben Franklin Parkway.

Genetic Perspectives on the Tarim Basin Mummies

Physics of the Art Museum

Anyone who still claims “dead men tell no tales” just isn’t listening. Through the National Geographic Society’s Genographic Project, anthropologist Spencer Wells has styled himself the Alan Lomax of the long-deceased, traveling the world to collect the genetic stories of diverse cultures. The yarns told by the 2,000- to 4,000-year-old mummies of China’s Tarim Basin have, like any point of history, proved to be controversial: The mummies’ largely Caucasian DNA belies modern-day Uyghur peoples’ claims to be indigenous to the region. Of course, the Penn Museum, which is hosting this discussion by Wells, has confronted its own mummy-related controversy of late; the actual mummies which served as the centerpiece of its “Secrets of the Silk Road” exhibition were held up by

mind-boggling quantum physics in the context of mindboggling modern art. —Shaun Brady ● ● ● Wed., April 20, 10:30 a.m., free with $16 museum admission, reservation required, Philadelphia Museum of Art, 2600 Ben Franklin Parkway.

Science in the Simpsons Professor Frink’s vaguely scientific outbursts might not be suitable source material for a study, but there’s plenty of legit science to be found just under the yellow skin. Dr. Paul Halpern, University of the Sciences physics professor and author of What’s Science Ever Done for Us?: What the Simpsons Can Teach Us about Physics, Robots, Life and the Universe, will relate his findings into a lighthearted and informative discussion. From the plausibility that radiation can concoct a three-eyed fish to Lisa’s alarm at that idiot-producing “Simpson gene,” he’ll dig into the real and fictitious postulations of Matt Groening’s world. Halpern will also field questions you were too embarrassed to ask at ComicCon, such as, “Is Tomacco a sustainable crop?” —Eric Schuman ● ● ● Thu., April 21, 1 p.m., free, Free Library, Kingsessing Branch, 1201 S. 51st St.

Astronomy Night: City Star Gazing The life of an astronaut is much more than pod bay doors and pouches of Tang. Dr. Guy Bluford doesn’t just hold the distinction of being the first African-American in space (he was on the third flight of the Challenger in ’83) — he’s also a native of West Philly. His mission, STS-8, included hauling an Indian communication/weather satellite, testing the “Canadarm” remote manipulator and, perhaps most useful of all, experiments with so-called “space sickness.” As Bluford will tell you: In space, no one can hear you barf. After the space-talk, an evening of stargazing awaits in Clark Park. Local astronomers will supply telescopes and tips on how to best observe the night sky. —Eric Schuman ● ● ● Thu., April 21, 8 p.m., free, University of the Sciences: McNeil Science and Technology Center, 43rd Street and Woodland Avenue. >>> continued on page 18

Every tourist who’s ever stood wheezing at the top of the Art Museum steps after a post-cheesesteak Rocky Balboa victory run understands intuitively the forces at work in hauling your out-of-shape self up that iconic edifice. Drexel science prof Mary Jo Grdina, however, can explain the honest-to-goodness physics of it all: Gravitational potential energy is at least partially to blame for you having to stop and catch your breath halfway up (though mostly it was that second whiz wit). Grdina and Art Museum educators Barbara Bassett and Steve Wills will lead a unique tour of the museum focused not on its masterworks’ place in art history but in physical space: the Newtonian dynamics of the Diana weather vane, the materials science of the arms and armor galleries, light and color throughout various pieces — perhaps even Physics of the Art Museum, April 20, investigates whether you can really shoot a bow on tiptoes. ● ● ●


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Critical Decision Making: Science, Religion and the Law We all know consistency is too much to ask from either extreme end of the political spectrum, so it should come as no surprise that conservatives who wave the banners of Constitutional originalism and judicial restraint were caught short when one of their own rendered a decision they didn’t like. Judge John E. Jones III has consistently defended his decision in the “Kitzmiller v. Dover Area School District” case, in which he ruled against teaching intelligent design in the classroom, as a by-the-book reading of the First Amendment. Of course, for those to whom peppering speculation with technical jargon transforms creationism into intelligent design, it’s not a huge leap to brand Jones a judicial activist, but he hardly fits the part. The George W. Bush appointee is a Republican who, as PLCB chairman in the late ’90s, banned Bad Frog Beer from state store shelves thanks to a rude gesture on the label. He’ll discuss the thought process that goes into a decision like Kitzmiller, an alien concept for those whose minds are never less than made up. —Shaun Brady ● ● ● Sat., April 23, 2 p.m., free, Community College of Philadelphia, Winnet Student Life Building, Room S2-19, 1700 Spring Garden St.

The Hidden Reality with Brian Greene Flipping through the channels recently, I settled on CSPAn2 for a discussion between physicist/author Brian

Greene and mathematician Amir Aczel at Boston’s Museum of Science. Aczel insisted on rebuking Greene’s embrace of seemingly out-there concepts involving string theory and multiple universes with arcane scientific points and logical arguments (he is a mathematician, after all), at which Greene constantly recoiled — not so much at the questioning, but at Aczel’s insistence on engaging him in a private scholarly debate, alienating an audience still struggling with Einstein. Though the topics he wrestles with — his latest book, The Hidden Reality, covers parallel universes and their implications for the laws of the universe — are disorientingly difficult to wrap one’s real-world head around, Greene is a knee-jerk populist, intensely eager to educate a skeptical public. There’s enough sci-fi bizarreness in his work to draw the crowds; it’s his engaging personality (as it was Stephen Hawking’s personal story before him) that makes the dense information go down a little smoother. —Shaun Brady

then the apothecary, barber and horse doctor were all the same person, and nobody let the facts get in the way of a good story. Or a burning at the stake. —Eric Schuman ● ● ● Thu., April 28, 5:30 p.m., free with online reservation, Wagner Free Institute of Science, 1700 W. Montgomery Ave.

● ● ● Thu., April 28, noon, free, Free Library, Central Branch, 1901 Vine St.

Seemed Right at the Time?! Scenes from Science Past In ye olde times, even exact science wasn’t an exact science. Sure, there was gravity and photosynthesis and such, but superstitions and uninformed claims were inseparably linked to widely accepted theories. This comical showcase delves into once-widely-held beliefs and practices that have since fallen out of scientific favor: divination, astrology, witch identification. Ah, ’twas a simpler time. Back April 21 is Astronomy Night, and Clark Park will be full of (smaller) telescopes for stargazing. ● ● ●


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icepack By A.D. Amorosi

➤ Have you been appreciating jazz like you’re

supposed to during April, aka Jazz Appreciation Month? Cleaning your spit valves and toweling down your bellows? If you don’t feel like cleaning or toweling, you could just applaud the good news that two new jazz boîtes will be added to Philly’s short list. Michael and Jerry D’Addesi ran Eighth and Fitzwater’s Vesuvio as a family restaurant and disco bar until December 2010 when they closed for repairs. They reopened in February and, starting at the end of April, they’ll turn a part of the old dining room into Little Bar, a nightly venue for live jazz. That’s a weird and welcome change. Then there’s Matthew “Feldie” Feldman’s Lucky Old Souls (LOS) live jazz club at 1713 McKean. After applying for his liquor license in October 2009, with a hearing in August 2010, Feldman got word in January 2011 that the PLCB finally approved his application. “That is until one individual — not a representative of a church or any other institution, just an individual neighbor — filed an appeal in the Court of Common Pleas,” says Feldman. Now, the person has withdrawn his/her protest and LOS is on a fast track. “I’m meeting with the general contractor this week,” says Feldman. The renovations should allow LOS to be open before the end of 2011. ➤ Philly’s sweetest money-loser Tasty Baking Co. and its outstanding debt were purchased by Flowers Foods, a company out of Georgia. Bring back the trans fat smoothness on its cupcake icing and I’m in. ➤ Local political cartoonist/cave drawing specialist John Overmyer displays his newest largest drawings at West Philly’s Gallery 13W (at 45th and Regent) starting April 16. “If you like big 6-foot black birds on paper, you will like this show,” Overmyer assures me. ➤ RJD2 — the producer, the DJ, the man with the theme song to Mad Men — doesn’t make it back to his Philly home too often. So it’s very cool that he and Tayyib Smith (publisher of two.one.five mag) will host a free panel discussion on the future of music technology during Philly Tech Week — April 27, at the Arts Bank. Stand in line. ➤ While Darren Morze toils as the Trocadero sound man with the best hair, his wife, Afsaneh Taki, has opened shophomage.com, a curated collection of vintage fashion items and housewares from the U.S. and Europe. Go there. ➤ For those who love Fork’s Wednesday-only bistro dinners, chef Terence Feury and owner Ellen Yin now offer the fourcourse-$45-per-person for large groups every night. April is goat month. Goats and jazz in April. Go figure. ➤ Want more? Maybe with some photos? Check out Icepack Illustrated at citypaper. net/criticalmass. (a_amorosi@citypaper.net)

SMOKE AND MIRRORS: For its production of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead, Curio Theatre Co. transforms a giant 114-year-old West Philadelphia chapel into an intimate, interactive stage. Kyle Cassidy

[ theater ]

Divine intervention Curio Theatre Co. finds a heavenly balance between church and stage. By Bruce Walsh

A

s paul Kuhn walks up the steps of the Calvary Center, the Band-aid on the crest of his head unsticks itself, revealing a nasty little gash. “a pipe snuck up on me in the basement,” he says, with a halfhearted attempt to reapply the bandage. “There’s always a few that take me by surprise down there.” For the past six years, Curio Theatre Co. has performed exclusively in this space, a 114-year-old decaying, hauntingly beautiful church at 48th and Baltimore. Kuhn — Curio’s co-founder, artistic director, occasional performer, technical director and principal set designer — works nearly every day in the historical chapel, but he’s still discovering quirks. and low-hanging pipes. Eleven years ago, in an effort to preserve the building — and to keep its priceless Tiffany windows in the neighborhood — community and Calvary United Methodist Church members formed the Calvary Center for Culture and Community. Curio was one of the organizations enlisted to inhabit the space, attracted by next-tonothing rent and near-total artistic freedom. Kuhn and his collaborators soon had visions of a major professional repertory theater on Baltimore avenue. But the company has been slow to grow, while struggling to find its niche in West philly. Curio’s projected 2011 budget is just a tick over $100,000. professional Equity theaters in the region typically have an annu-

al budget well over $400,000. But lately Curio has stopped trying to fight its idiosyncratic home. it’s taken about six years, but all three staff members say they finally understand how to work with the hand they’ve been dealt. “as soon as you walk into the space, the architectural elements overwhelm you. i mean, you’re trying to say ‘look at this little stage’ to the audience, and in the meantime they have a 50-foot Jesus standing in front of them,” says Kuhn, referring to those invaluable stained-glass windows. The situation came to a head three years ago with their production of Joe Orton’s 1969 sex farce, What the Butler Saw. Kuhn readily admits his design for the show was ill-conceived: a realistic unit set smack-dab in the middle of the cavernous cathedral. The show often played to audiences of 20 to 30 in a space with endless rows of church pews that could hold hundreds. Tough room. “We had this big meeting during that show, and we finally realized that you just can’t be funny in that chapel,” Kuhn exclaims, sitting up straight in Curio’s West philly office and extracting big, knowing laughs from the other staff members. it’s hard to disagree with him. a sex farce is definitely a tough sell with Jesus watching every dick joke. But for their 2009 production of The Weir, the company tried something radically different: They sat the audience right on the

A sex farce is definitely a tough sell with Jesus watching every joke.

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the naked city | feature

[ dazzling, artful visions ] ➤ dancemaker/babymaker

Mustachioed Trenton newspaper columnist Ernie Kovacs moved to philly to become the auteur of a wild morning show for WpTZTV (now KYW), Three to Get Ready. The only thing better than his weird characters — lisping poet “percy Dovetonsils,” German DJ “Wolfgang von Sauerbrauten” — is the manic, magical fashion in which he created dazzling, artful visions with a budget of under $20. He gets celebrated with this week’s six-DVD release, The Ernie Kovacs Collection. —a.d. amorosi

Everyone knows Benjamin Millepied as smokin’ baby-daddy to the most-crushedon starlet in Hollywood. But the choreographer’s recognized for more than dissing Natalie portman’s character in Black Swan (and then bedding her in real life, as she’s pointed out multiple times on national TV). Millepied — which, conveniently, means “a thousand feet” in French — launches a world première at the Merriam (april 14-17, paballet.org) for the pennsylvania Ballet’s Building on Balanchine program. Get to know Millepied — but not too well, ’cause we all know how Natalie gets when she’s jealous. —Carolyn huckabay

➤ rock/pop Baltimore’s guitar-drums duo Wye Oak usually gets the indiefolk tag, and that’s understandable — their albums can be kinda charming and quiet and earthly, sometimes. But the live shows set the record straight: This is a loud, luscious rock ’n’ roll band. Check them out this Friday at Johnny Brenda’s (april 15, johnnybrendas. com) and see if Jenn Wasner doesn’t shred and wail on that thing.

M.J. Fine does it again

➤ literature Ten years wasn’t enough time for david Foster Wallace to finish his gigantic irS odyssey, but by all accounts it was medication issues, not writing-related frustration, that led him to suicide in ’08. Now that the incomplete The Pale King (little, Brown) is on the shelves — thanks to some heroic meatball surgery by editor Michael pietsch — we can at least glimpse Wallace’s intent and savor his exhaustive/exhausting prose. at the Free library on Friday (april 15, freelibrary.org), Ken Kalfus will host a celebration of his friend/peer’s work, including a discussion and screening of Wallace’s appearance at the library in 2004. —Patrick rapa

—Patrick rapa

flickpick

[ movie review ]

AtlAs shrugged: PArt 1 [ D- ] for the rich, white and powerful, it must be hard to see yourself constantly

This ain’t no Tolkien trilogy.

some unlikely artists are making their way to the top. Take Cake. In January, the Sacramento quintet earned the dubious distinction of having the lowest-selling No. 1 album of the SoundScan era. Showroom of Compassion (Upbeat), their sixth fulllength and first new release since 2004, topped the Billboard 200 by shifting a mere 44,000 units before plunging to No. 25 the following week. (Amos Lee broke that record two weeks later.) But let’s leave others to ponder a chart that plots the plummeting popularity of its product. More pressing: Why would 44,000 people buy a new Cake album? Frontman John McCrea’s hardly the most expressive singer or gifted lyricist. Accordingly, Showroom’s best track is “Teenage Pregnancy,” an instrumental sparring match between classical and Western motifs. Less successful are sing-songy numbers, and the character sketches vary in quality: “Italian Guy” lacks insight, but “Mustache Man (Wasted)” gets by on hooks and a decent trumpet part. The sentiments are trite, the music’s maudlin and the album’s solar-powered production belies its lack of emotional warmth, but at least McCrea doesn’t sound as douchey as he used to. On that count, Showroom has an advantage over 1996’s Fashion Nugget, Cake’s second effort, which peaked at No. 36 but moved more than a million copies in under seven months. It’s a safe bet that well over 44,000 radio listeners picked it up on the strength of “The Distance,” back when people did that. Give Cake this: Their biggest hit doesn’t sound quite like anyone else, with guitars and trumpet egging on McCrea as he narrates a race or a relationship. At least another 44,000 people bought the disc for the a sarcastic cover of “I Will Survive” with none of the verve of the original. In those two tracks, McCrea plays all his cards. He returns to the road for the smug “Race Car Ya-Yas” and “Stickshifts and Safetybelts,” and pulls the deadpan-cover trick again on the standard “Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps” and Willie Nelson’s “Sad Songs and Waltzes.” Fewer people are buying records? Sad. Fewer people are buying fewer Cake records? Sweet. (m_fine@citypaper.net)  Cake plays the Keswick April 17 and 18.

21

BRACE YOURSELF: In her soap-opera turn as Dagny Taggart, Taylor Schilling makes Ayn Rand’s magnum opus feel like a lackluster new TV series.

➤ With the music industry in meltdown mode,

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depicted as the villain. Hollywood just doesn’t understand what a truly noble cause the accumulation of one’s own wealth truly is. Finally, the wealthy and industrious have a voice, and it comes, unsurprisingly, via ayn rand’s magnum opus. Fox News, which may well found its own awards ceremony to head off Oscar’s inevitable snubbing, would have you believe that Atlas Shrugged is “the movie Hollywood doesn’t want you to see.” if that’s the case, it will be helped immeasurably in its campaign by this lifeless adaptation, which virtually grabs viewers by the lapels and intones woodenly, “This is what will come of Obama’s socialism.” after four decades in development hell, during which names from Farrah Fawcett to angelina Jolie have been attached, ayn rand disciple John aglialoro has finally brought the book to the screen as a planned trilogy. Tolkien this ain’t, however; in its nighttime soap-level acting and direction (by One Tree Hill actor paul Johansson), this feels like the première episode of a lackluster new TV series rather than an epic film. (Who is John Galt? Find out Tuesdays this fall on CBS!) in zealously putting rand’s Objectivist arguments in the mouths of actors, aglialoro verges on the self-parodic: Dagny Taggart (Taylor Schilling) laments the “stupid altruistic urges” of charity and redistribution of wealth in the film’s dystopian 2016 (in which rail travel has regained its prominence in american life, thus allowing slavish fidelity to rand’s novel). Steel magnate Henry rearden (Grant Bowler) is defiant of aiding others in his heroic efforts to make money, hindered by a shrewish wife who has the gall to demand attention from her busy husband and a grasping brother always asking for handouts to aid the poor. if it weren’t for the monotony of people in board rooms making speeches at each other about stock prices and business deals, the topsy-turvy Tea party reality might actually be perversely entertaining. —Shaun Brady

CAke WAlk

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Robin Rice on visual art

DISTRIBUTION: 90,000 copies / ISSUE DATE: May 12, 2011 RESERVATION DEADLINE: April 12, 2011

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[ arts & entertainment ]

Sheila hiCkS: 50 yearS | Through Aug. 7,

free, Institute of Contemporary Art 118 S. 36th St., 215-898-7108, icaphila.org

â&#x17E;¤ Upon exiting Sheila hickSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; retrospective at

the iCa, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re bound to feel a deep respect for her half-century of â&#x20AC;&#x153;thinking it through with the fingers.â&#x20AC;? This response is not just an appreciation of the achievements of a major artist; it is a reminder that Hicks â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and perhaps all art â&#x20AC;&#x201D; begins with simple, palpable delight in the profoundly quotidian specificity of things. Material things are commonly dismissed as superficial in contrast to spiritual insights or values. The truth is exactly otherwise. Exploring the physicality of things, we brush against universal, intricate mysteries. This is not Hicksâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; stated purpose or subject matter, but it is difficult to ignore as a wellspring of her work. Hicks exploits the fiber essence of almost anything: newspapers, drinking straws, metal filaments, feathers, rubber bands. From micro to macro in scale, â&#x20AC;&#x153;50 Yearsâ&#x20AC;? includes small, medium and large weavings and wrappings. The smallest, she calls minimes. There are 62 minimes from every phase of her career, each scarcely larger than those goofy loop pot holders we made as kids. They are fascinating in the way they show Hicksâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; mind at work: She locks on to an idea â&#x20AC;&#x201D; say, weaving on the diagonal as opposed to a traditional grid â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and explores it in a sequence of variations. Born in 1934 in Hastings, Neb., Hicks learned to spin, weave and sew along with other basic life skills. Since Hastings, she has traveled and lived in many places and currently splits her year between NYC and paris. The earliest work in the show, Faja III from 1956, is a 21-inch-long vertical in salt (white weft) and pepper (black warp). The central figure of a yellow and orange cross perhaps hints at the peruvian burial bundles that impressed her as an art student. She studied the work of weavers in Ecuador, Bolivia, peru and Mexico on a post-graduate Fulbright. afterward, Hicks returned to Yale for an M.F.a. in painting (fiber was not an option at the time). Today there are many fiber-arts programs in the United States; through her example, Hicks is certainly partly responsible.

The show includes galleryscale monochrome, piled-up fiber structures and tapestries. at around 72 inches square, Color Alphabet II/VI (1988) is one of the few resolute grids in the show. The many small, precise squares of different colors on an irregularly patterned ivory ground are classical, resolved. Her teacher, Josef albers, would be pleased. Sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s never been one to repose in obscurity. Her weaving entered the collection of the Museum of Modern art in the 1950s. Tapestries have been commissioned for corporate headquarters and offices around the world, air France 747s and a Saudi university. The iCa show includes a couple of multi-story sprawling sculptures on a grand scale. Thread is twisted fibers. Threads tend to twine around themselves and loop into skeins. The form is familiar to weavers

Universal, intricate mysteries. and knitters as a way of storing threads, untangled and aligned. The softness of hair is evoked by grayish skeins in Menhir (1998), but something more mechanical and architectural is suggested by the scarlet and white Bahmian (Banyan) (1968/2001, pictured), in which Hicks tightly wraps and constrains thick skeins in heavy, bold ropes hung in a configuration about 100 inches square. Wrapping objects into balls of yarn that conceal and protect as they display is a form Hicks often uses, perhaps harkening back to her early interest in grave bundles. The heaped balls function as cumulative, openended assemblages. Hicksâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; accomplishments extend to many forms not included in the iCa show: photography, object installations, book arts and more. Her work is perennially relevant in its eagerness to engage with the protean stuff of nature and civilization. (r_rice@citypaper.net)


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[ arts & entertainment ]

 Divine Intervention

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"          The Pew Center for Arts & Heritage Philadelphia Music Project

Paul Kuhn and Jared Reed turned the chapel into a living, breathing theater space almost entirely by hand. stage with the actors and cordoned off the rest of the space. Only 45 people could watch the play each night, but The Weir would become their most successful show. Soon they were finding ways to pile 70 seats into the sold-out performances. For their latest, Tom Stoppardâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s classic Rosen­ crantz and Guildenstern Are Dead, Kuhn and director Elizabeth Carlson have again implemented their Weir strategy. The audience will be on stage, where they can reach out and touch the performers. Just before a Monday-night rehearsal, Carlson and managing director Gay Carducci look on as Kuhn shows off the work-in-progress set for R&G. He and theater artistic associate Jared reed turned the chapel into a living, breathing theater space almost entirely by hand. Kuhn can enumerate its virtues and nagging frustrations with equal detail. in a tone something like the proud owner of a vintage Mustang, he describes the color

pattern of the new stage lights, the diameter of the pipes in the chapelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s antique organ, the height of the debris netting on the ceiling. But then he mentions a bat â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a real-live bat, which he named Mortimer â&#x20AC;&#x201D; currently living in the upper reaches of the century-old structure. a bat in the belfry â&#x20AC;&#x201D; literally! Carlson and Carducci throw him sideways glances, as if to say: â&#x20AC;&#x153;paul, are you actually telling a reporter that we have bats in our theater â&#x20AC;&#x201D; really?â&#x20AC;? But if looked at the right way, a live bat entering stage left could be a magical theater experience. You just have to find the right audience. (editorial@citypaper.net)  rosencrantz and Guildenstern are

Dead runs through May 14, $10­$15, Curio Theatre Co. at Calvary Center for Culture and Community, 4740 Baltimore Ave., 215­525­1350, curio­ theatre.org.

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[ movies ]

Hero WorsHip Super bucks good-over-evil convention in favor of average-Joe comeuppance. By Sam Adams

[ B+ ] SuPer | Written and directed by James Gunn, an IFC Films release, opens Friday at Ritz East

T

he way the movie Kick-Ass should have been, or Watchmen could have been, James Gunn’s Super is a hilarious and deliberately unsettling polemic whose tonal whipsawing has been flummoxing a good number of critics. i’d rather spend my words praising the movie, at least the parts of it that work, than debunking its negative notices, but suffice it to say that the people who miss the movie’s point manage at the same time to prove it. Super’s hero, so to speak, is Frank (rainn Wilson), a glum shortorder cook who recalls just two perfect moments in his unexceptional life: pointing out a fleeing shoplifter to a nearby policeman and marrying Sarah (liv Tyler), a recovering addict who presumably finds his dullness consoling. Their imperfect union founders when Sarah encounters a swaggering drug dealer named Jacques (Kevin Bacon); next thing Frank knows, she’s gone, trading domestic stability for the joys of getting heroin shot between her toes. Frank responds as any impotent ex-husband would: He slips on a makeshift costume, grabs a pipe wrench and reinvents himself as a crime-fighting vigilante called The Crimson Bolt. The idea comes to him via divine inspiration, here manifested as a tentacle-rape scene out of Japanese porn, with additional details supplied by a hyperkinetic comic-book store clerk named libby (Ellen page).

in the wake of Watchmen (the comic, not the movie), situating superheroes in the “real” world has been a facile way for genre geeks to feign seriousness while essentially serving the same adolescent needs. But Super doesn’t deconstruct the costumed-hero idea so much as dismantle it, with broad swipes that leave plenty of collateral damage. There’s no training montage to transform Frank into a perfect physical specimen, no sensei to Super school him in the ancient art of crushing heads. He’s still a lump, albeit a bright red one, skulking behind Dumpsters waiting for crimes to happen. His lunatic determination gives him a degree of invincibility, as does the slack-jawed look his victims adopt when they see his lumbering form approaching, which gives Frank just enough time to swing his wrench and shatter their limbs. Gunn isn’t the first to observe that this brand of self-empowerment dovetails with some deeply twisted psychology, but he takes a sick sort of glee in running with the idea. after he’s brutalized a few street-corner thugs, Frank starts to lose his sense of proportion, cracking the skull of an obnoxious yuppie who cuts into a movie-theater line. Gunn actually shows us the poor jerk’s head splitting open, a moment that splits the movie, as well. Frank isn’t Super’s most gung-ho ass-kicker. after libby susses out The Crimson Bolt’s secret identity and blackmails Frank into making her his sidekick, her giddy excitement turns to enthusiastic bloodletting. Gunn stages the scene where libby demonstrates her skills to Frank as slapstick, with her karate-chopping the air

[ arts & entertainment ]

and turning awkward cartwheels, but he’s deliberately wrong-footing the audience to maximize the shock when she starts to do serious damage. at the same time, her wide-eyed insanity is more ingratiating than Frank’s tortured plodding, and the sight of a pint-size page sinking her juryrigged Wolverine claws into a bad guy’s face has a genuinely revolutionary kick to it. She’s Super’s action-movie id, crushing a thug’s legs with her cart and cackling as he spits blood, until the moment when it suddenly isn’t funny any more. Super is an ungainly movie, unevenly paced and transparently shot on the cheap; at worst, it’s an eyesore. But for all its goofball jokes and gratuitous splatter, it’s a genuine movie of ideas, more genuinely provocative than any of its glossy big-studio cousins. Some critics are inclined to hold the movie responsible for their own discomfort, to read its deliberate ugliness as incidental. But Gunn knows what he’s doing, although his execution often falters. Notwithstanding its disreputable façade, Super is thrilling filmmaking, even when it’s a lousy film. (s_adams@citypaper.net)


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27


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â&#x20AC;&#x153;PROVOCATIVE. PULSES WITH THE THRILL OF DISCOVERY.â&#x20AC;? - Richard Corliss, TIME

â&#x20AC;&#x153;MESMERIZING. A largely untold story of American justice.â&#x20AC;?

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- Peter Travers, ROLLING STONE

â&#x20AC;&#x153;BRILLIANT! RIVETING and suspenseful. Robert Redford has crafted a revealing look into our history that you only thought you knew.â&#x20AC;? - Pete Hammond, BOXOFFICE

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JAMES SOLOMON & GREGORY BERNSTEIN ROBERT REDFORD JAMES SOLOMON

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 New AtlAs shrugged: PArt 1|DRead Shaun Bradyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s review on p. 21. (Ritz at the Bourse)

the CoNsPirAtor|CEvery grade school kid can recount the basic facts about Abraham Lincolnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s assassination. Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s remarkable about the story, however, is how much of it almost no one knows. As far as most Americans are aware, John Wilkes Booth is another of historyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lone gunmen; the fact that simultaneous attempts were made on the lives of the vice president and secretary of state, and the subsequent trial of eight conspirators, tends to get left out of the textbooks. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an equally fascinating part of the story, but one in which Robert Redford unfortunately stresses parallels to more recent events; as with his last film, Lions for Lambs, Redford insists on scoring points against George W. Bush rather than crafting a measured story. Screenwriter James D. Solomon focuses on Mary Surratt, who ran the boarding house in which the assassination plot was hatched; historians continue to argue over her actual complicity. But Redford is more concerned with the military tribunal gathered to try her, and the determination of Secretary of War Edwin Stanton (Kevin Kline, acting with his beard) to force a conviction in the name of healing the nation. As her reluctant soldier-turned-lawyer, James McAvoy expresses the uncertainty over Surrattâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s involvement, but Robin Wright plays her as a noble, suffering mother. If Booth failed to choose wisely when assembling his co-conspirators, Redford repeats historyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mistake in his bizarre casting: As McAvoyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s friends, Justin Long and Alexis Bledel seem to struggle under the weight of their period garb, while Danny Huston as the prosecuting at-

torney glowers and bellows like Orson Welles after a long day shooting Paul Masson ads. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Shaun Brady (Ritz East)

the humAN resourCes mANAger|C When a fired, immigrant bakery worker named Yulia dies in Jerusalem, her unclaimed corpse is identified by a company pay stub. As such, a newspaper journalist (Guri Alfi) targets the bakery and its human resources manager (Mark Ivanir) for their callousness. The unnamed manager is quickly shamed into seeing that Yulia gets a proper burial. But what begins as a mystery about identity quickly becomes a standard-issue road movie in which the title character travels to Yuliaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s unnamed country (Romania), meets her uncivilized son, and hopes to become a good employee and a better father/husband in the process. And he might, if The Human Resources Manager had any real insights into the human condition. Instead, this flat film â&#x20AC;&#x201D; the winner of the Israeli Oscar for Best Picture â&#x20AC;&#x201D; has only fleeting moments of humor (an amusing morgue scene) and drama (the son wanting to open his motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s coffin). This literal journey of self-discovery never quite resonates. For all of the bureaucratic red tape, and the â&#x20AC;&#x153;twistâ&#x20AC;? ending, the character(s) still exploit/are exploited, and the themes of guilt/responsibility are merely glossed over. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Gary M. Kramer (Ritz at the Bourse)

iN A Better world|BA doctor working in an African refugee camp, Anton (Mikael Persbrandt) stitches together children and women caught in the middle of menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brutal contests. Back home in Denmark, his wife, Marianne (Trine Dyrholm), also a doctor, contends with the growing frustrations of their 10-year-old son, Elias (Markus Rygaard), whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s being bullied at school. When a new classmate, Christian


Bill Cunningham new York | B Ritz at the Bourse

Jane eYre | B Ritz Five limitless | C UA Riverview the linColn lawYer | BUA Riverview of gods and men | CRitz at the Bourse Queen to plaY| B Ritz at the Bourse soul surfer | C UA Grant, UA Riverview sourCe Code | C+ UA Riverview suCker punCh | CRoxy, UA Riverview win win | BRitz Five For full movie reviews and showtimes, visit citypaper.net/movies.

Potiche|B+

ScRe4M|C+ Beginning with a series of moviewithin-a-movie cold opens nested like russian dolls, the fourth Scream film announces its head-swimmingly meta metaness, which it then proceeds to call attention to continuously for the next 90 minutes. Always self-aware, the series is now self-aware about its self-awareness, with characters calling attention not only to their equivalents in horror films, but in the Scream franchise itself â&#x20AC;&#x201D; or rather the Stab franchise â&#x20AC;&#x201D; you get the point. itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been 10 years since the last round of Ghostface killings, and â&#x20AC;&#x153;celebrity victimâ&#x20AC;? Sidney prescott (Neve Campbell) returns to the scene of the crimes, her old hometown, as the author of a new self-help book. As a new round of killings begins, she meets up with old friends (Courtney Cox and David Arquette reference their real-life marital issues, adding yet another layer of blur to the fantasy/reality boundary) and a new generation raised simultaneously on the legacy of the actual murders and their cinematic counterparts. Kevin Williamsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s script makes all the requisite genre references, updating the approach with social-networking teens intensely aware of framing their every move in the public eye. Wes Craven occasionally scores by anticipating audience catcalls and

WinteR in WaRtiMe A haiku: Martijn lakemeier! Yorick van Wageningen! Martin Koolhoven! (Not reviewed) (Ritz at the Bourse)

 continuing aRthuR|Bin tackling an Arthur update, Modern Family director Jason Winer crafts a surprisingly faithful retelling. Too faithful, actually. russell Brand would be perfect as that hedonistic, irresponsible character (heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s essentially played it twice already), but heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s instead called on to reprise Dudley Mooreâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s charming kook act. He about pulls it off, and manages to be likable and funny where his usual persona can grate, but he appears uncomfortable with the restraint. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;S.B. (Roxy, UA 69th St., UA Grant, UA Riverview) ceRtified coPy|A in Tuscany (so far so good), a man and a woman meet (perhaps) and spend a day forging (?) an increasingly contentious relationship. That stuttering synopsis is about as close as one can get to a definitive account of Abbas Kiarostamiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s elusive, engrossing Certified Copy, the iranian masterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first feature shot outside his native country, and his first narrative in nearly a decade. itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a difficult film to explain, but not to watch, a dizzying balancing act whose heights are apparent only in retrospect. looking back, you may be astonished at how far youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been taken. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;S.A. (Ritz Five)

Danny McBrideâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s medieval weed comedy suffers from the chief symptom of everything thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ever been dreamed up while extremely stoned: itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not nearly as uproarious as it seemed when you were baked out of your damn gourd. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not to say that McBrideâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s surly, retort-based brand of humor is ineffectual, but Your Highness lacks the metronomic silliness that solidified Pineapple Express as a true magnum dope-us. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;D.L. (Pearl, UA 69th St., UA Grant, UA Riverview)

Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll never drink Merlot the same again. Wed., April 20, 7:30 p.m., $10.

docK StReet 701 S. 50th St., 215-726-2337, dockstreetbeer.com. Tron (1982, U.S., 96 min.) â&#x20AC;&#x153;Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve enjoyed all the power youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been given, havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t you? i wonder how youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d take to working in a pocket calculator.â&#x20AC;? Tue., April 19, 8:30 p.m., free.

MugShotS 2100 Fairmount Ave., 267-514-7145, mugshotscoffeehouse.com. The Green Mile (1989, U.S., 189 min.): A death row inmate possesses the power of faith healing. Mon., April 18, 7 p.m., free.

â&#x153;&#x161; RePeRtoRy filM the Balcony 1003 Arch St., 215-922-6888, thetroc. com. Scream 3 (2000, U.S., 116 min.): â&#x20AC;&#x153;All i know is that in the third one, all bets are off.â&#x20AC;? Mon., April 18, 8 p.m., $3.

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824 W. Lancaster Ave., Bryn Mawr, 610-527-9898, brynmawrfilm.org.

r e p e r t o r y f i l m l i s t i n g s at C i t y pa p e r . n e t / r e p f i l m .

EMPOWERING AND RELEVANT.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;SOPHISTICATED AND QUICK-WITTED!â&#x20AC;?

â&#x20AC;&#x153;DELIGHTFULLY

-THE NEW YORK OBSERVER

-THE NEW YORK TIMES

       A FILM BY

FRANĂ&#x2021;OIS OZON

( 

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EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT STARTS FRIDAY, APRIL 15

      

    

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hanna|Aif Hanna were called Harold, no one would give a shit. if rogue asset Erik (Eric Bana) raised a scrappy son, not a fragile, lethal daughter, as his spy/assassin scion, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d be viewed as a negligible action romp. But Hanna (the incredible Saoirse ronan) is no boy. Sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a towheaded 16-year-old menace, and sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll cut your throat. Joe Wrightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fourth feature serves up Bildungsroman tropes in a most peculiar fashion, posing the question:

Sideways (2004, U.S., 126 min.):

    FOLLOW US ON

AND

           

(((!$"&$ "'"

29

Tipping his sequined hat to Jacques Demy and Vincente Minnelli, François Ozon blends social realism, boudoir farce and conspicuous style

A haiku: CGi birds with creepy mouths and dead doll eyes have dumb adventures. (Not reviewed) (Pearl, UA 69th St., UA Grant, UA Riverview)

Read Sam Adamsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; review on p. 26. (Ritz East)

youR highneSS|B-

[ movie shorts ]

P h i l a d e l P h i a C i t y Pa P e r | A p r i l 1 4 - A p r i l 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C i t y Pa P e r . n e t |

(William Jøhnk Nielsen, effectively chilling), threatens the villain with a knife, Elias believes heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s found a savior as well as a friend with whom he can share secrets and ice cream. But as Susanne Bierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s film â&#x20AC;&#x201D; winner of this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Oscar for Best Foreign language Film â&#x20AC;&#x201D; wraps itself in clichĂŠs and contrivances, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s clear enough that all the men and boys have lessons to learn. As much as the males try to sort out their roiling emotions, they are, of course, angry and resentful, caught in the middle of their own contests. By the time Christian conjures a vengeance plan, the movie appears to be comparing white, European rituals with those in black Africa, but its political and moral parallels turn too simple. The effort to teach and also redeem the good doctor sends the plot into melodramatic contortions. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Cindy Fuchs (Ritz Five)

Rio the Movie

SuPeR|B+

How fast does a little girl come of age when sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s being tracked by professional hit men? While Wright tends to spread on his metaphors thick, his urbane eye is the enamel lacquered over the riskiest, most original major release of this young year. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Drew Lazor (Pearl, UA 69th St., UA Grant, UA Riverview)

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insidious | BPearl, UA 69th St., UA Grant, UA Riverview

delaying the inevitable shock while an actress actually does check the back seat or under the car. But it is in essence another slasher film, and whether your characters are thinly drawn because theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re victims in a horror film or because theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re winkingly drawing attention to their roles as victims in a â&#x20AC;&#x153;horror film,â&#x20AC;? itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s still more of the same. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;S.B. (Pearl, UA 69th St., UA Grant, UA Riverview)

a&e

hop | D Pearl, UA 69th St., UA Grant, UA Riverview

in deliriously enjoyable fashion with Potiche. (The title is translated as â&#x20AC;&#x153;trophy wife,â&#x20AC;? but it can equally mean figurehead.) Catherine Deneuve, her late-career regality in full blossom, plays Suzanne pujol, the wife of a despotic factory owner who is thrust into the limelight when his striking employees kidnap their boss. instantly at sea, she turns to an old lover: Maurice (GĂŠrard Depardieu), a corpulent communist with whom she enjoyed a brief but passionate afternoon in the forest. The story is set in 1977, giving Suzanneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ascension an added kick. More tangibly, the period gives Ozon a pretext to indulge his flair for fabulous excess with every tight sweater and pair of pastel slacks. Unlike Ozonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s polemically frivolous 8 Women, Potiche works both sides of the aisle, cueing its serious developments with a piercing synthesizer sting. The movie doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t go back and forth so much as it exposes different layers with each step forward, like planets shifting in and out of phase. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Sam Adams (Ritz Five)

the naked city | feature

alSo Playing


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agenda

the

lisTings@ciTypaper.neT | ApRil 14 - ApRil 20

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the agenda

[ it’s so sexy to be living in america ]

SPIN CYCLE: Arts and music collide at “Sonic Textures” (featuring poster art like Vortex by Bruce Horan, pictured), Friday night at PhilaMOCA.

The Agenda is our selective guide to what’s going on in the city this week. For comprehensive event listings, visit citypaper.net/listings.

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A P R I L 1 4 - A P R I L 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C i T Y pA p E R . N E T

iF YOU WANT TO BE liSTED:

Submit information by mail (City Paper Listings, 123 Chestnut St., Third Floor, Philadelphia, PA 19106) or e-mail (listings@ citypaper.net) to Josh Middleton. Details of the event — date, time, address of venue, telephone number and admission price — should be included. Incomplete submissions will not be considered, and listings information will not be accepted over the phone.

Thursday

4.14 [ dance ]

 Kathryn teBordo: not Fragile How many ways can bodies intertwine? Fighting, playing, making love — two people in close physical contact can combine and recombine in con-

figurations violent and tender, beautiful and ridiculous. Choreographer Kathryn TeBordo, founder of the Workshop for Potential Movement, examines the iterations of this intricate human ballet in Not Fragile, a three-hour “performance sculpture” in which dancers Sarah Gladwin Camp and Gregory Holt will explore plenty of territory while covering very little ground. The performance, with music by Mikronesia, will take place once, at the show’s opening reception, and then play out again and again on video over the next few weeks. The piece’s length allows ample time to fully delve into the alternations of monotony and novelty inherent in such close physical contact, not to mention how absurdly and fascinatingly we manage to fit ourselves together. —Shaun Brady Opening reception Thu., April 14, 6-9 p.m., free, through May 6, NEXUS/ foundation for today’s art, Crane Arts Building, 1400 N. American St., 215684-1946, nexusphiladelphia.org.

[ rock/pop ]

 the go! team/ dom When The Go! Team first emerged with 2004’s rip-roaringly fun Thunder Lightning Strike, they got a lot of comparisons to 1970s TV superhero theme music — a niche twist on nostalgic retro-pop that’s hardly been attempted before or since. Well, seven years hardly seem to have aged the Brighton-based squadron a single day; Rolling Blackouts (Memphis Industries) is just as bursting with tangy artificial flavor: blustering brass fanfares, double Dutch hip-hop, ersatz J-Pop, sunshiny daydream instrumentals, drill team funk-bursts and swoony girl-group ditties, plus cameos from stateside youngsters Dominique Young Unique and Bethany Cosentino (of Best Coast). Synthy garage popsters Dom, meanwhile, sorta come off like Saturday-morning cartoon stars in their own right; a gang of shaggy-haired slacker screw-

balls who may not have more than seven songs to their credit, all on the recently re-upped Sun Bronzed Greek Gods EP (Astralwerks), but have already managed to coin at least one timeless credo: “It’s so sexy to be living in America.” —K. Ross Hoffman Thu., April 14, 8 p.m., $16-$25, with Cheers Elephant and Shawn Ryan, TLA, 334 South St., 215-922-1011, livenation.com.

[ theater ]

 WanamaKer’s Pursuit Art for a predetermined purpose — say, to celebrate a time or place — can be tricky. Witness Rogelio Martinez’s Wanamaker’s Pursuit, commissioned by Arden Theatre Co. for PIFA. Young Nathan Wanamaker of Philadelphia (Jürgen Hooper) travels to Paris in 1911 to find products for his father’s department store. He also falls in love with a married woman (Geneviéve

Perrier), a bigger problem for Americans than for Parisians. Meanwhile, French artists declaim about their own importance: Author Gertrude Stein (Catharine K. Slusar), fashion designer Paul Poiret (Wilbur Edwin Henry) and painter Pablo Picasso (Shawn Fagan) come across as posers more concerned with their legacies than their art. Wanamaker stubbornly defends the supposed idealism of American business, which apparently played much less ironically in 1911 than today, when the titular store is now Macy’s and owned by a chain, rather than a family. —Mark Cofta Through May 22, $29-$48, Arden Theatre Co., 40 N. Second St., 215-9221122, ardentheatre.org.

[ jazz ]

 Pete angevine BeneFit Bassist Matt Stein originally planned this show to unveil his

new quartet Hope & Feathers, with Shot x Shot saxophonist Bryan Rogers, Inzinzac guitarist Alban Bailly, and drummer/soon-to-be ice cream entrepreneur Pete Angevine. Unfortunately, Angevine, who underwent a liver transplant in 2007, had to go back under the knife last week, so Mike Szekely is stepping in on drums and the show has become a fundraiser for Angevine’s medical bills. The good cause is just one more excuse to check out a killer lineup, which will also feature guitarist Mike Lorenz’s quartet and the Xeno Trio, with Sun Ra Arkestra guitarist David Hotep, Sonic Liberation Front percussionist Kevin Diehl and SxS bassist Matt Engle. —Shaun Brady Thu., April 14, 7 p.m., $5-$10, Green Line Café, 4426 Locust St., 215-2220799, greenlinecafe.com.

[ folk ]

 strand oF oaKs Wilkes-Barre native (and


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4.15 [ fundraiser ]

Fri., April 15, 8-11 p.m., $10, Liberti East, 2424 E. York St., Suite 122, womeninwarzones.org.

[ rock/pop/folk ]

the mountain Goats

—K. ross hoffman Thu., April 14, 9 p.m., $12, with Joe Pug, Johnny Brenda’s, 1201 N. Frankford Ave., 877-435-9849, johnnybrendas.com.

—holly Otterbein

raped, and then, after finally escaping the armed forces, ate clay and mud for weeks to survive. Scott Blanding and Brad

djnights

is. Even if we’re all doomed (which would appear to be the case), Darnielle’s celebrated songwriting makes the end times go down smooth. —eric Shuman Fri., April 15, 9 p.m., $18-$27, with Megafaun, TLA, 334 South St., 215922-1011, livenation.com.

[ documentary/ visual art/rock ]

 sonic textures Ever since the warped and brightly colored placards of the

P h i l a d e l P h i a C i t y Pa P e r | A p r i l 1 4 - A p r i l 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C i t y Pa P e r . n e t |

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unksould&bindierockelec troreggaegoth/industrial hiphopworldtrancer&b houserockelectrobreak stechnopunksould&bindie rockelectroreggaegoth/ industrialhiphoprockworld ierockelectroreggaeun ksould&bindierockelec troreggaegoth/industrial hiphopworldtrancer&b houserockelectrobreak get a life... unksould&bindierockelec troreggaegoth/industrial h iwww.citypaper.net/djnights phopworldtrancer&b houserockelectrobreak stechnopunksould&bindie rockelectroreggaegoth/ industrialhiphoprockworld ierockelectroreggaeun ksould&bindierockelec troreggaegoth/industrial hiphopworldtrancer&b houserockelectrobreak

Since the early ’00s, John Darnielle has strayed everfurther from his punishingly lo-fi roots and blossomed into a lush folk/rock master. His latest album, All Eternals Deck,

is The Mountain Goats’ first release for Merge records, and is a meditation on fate — specifically, how out-runnable it

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When a couple of Temple graduates recently traveled to the Democratic republic of the Congo, the tragedy they found in the war-tattered country was unspeakable: Take Sifa, a woman who was attacked by soldiers when she was 12, saw nine family members killed, was

[ the agenda ]

the agenda

 Women in War Zones party

laBriola made a film, Women in War Zones, to tell these people’s stories. Since then, they’ve started the Wamu Center, a literacy program in the Congo, which is geared toward women and young girls who’ve suffered sexual violence. This fundraiser goes toward transforming the Wamu Center into a self-sustaining juggernaut that will provide job training and counseling to women, too. There’ll be music and photos, and the organizers encourage everyone to wear “loud” clothing. Finally, those hot pants will have a raison d’être.

D.l. AnDErSon

Friday

the naked city | feature | a&e

recently transplanted philadelphian) Timothy Showalter revealed a rare talent for inventive yarn-spinning and emotional nuance with the dark, mythic folk of last year’s Pope Killdragon (eMusic Selects), whose wide-ranging narratives include tales of a 12-foot giant, a phantasmagoric meeting with JFK, a personal address to the biblical/historical Mary, and a poignant reflection from the perspective of a grief-stricken Dan Aykroyd. Showalter’s knack for inhabiting and exploring unlikely characters and his evocative use of detail occasionally recall The Mountain Goats, although he’s got a richer, more melodious voice than John Darnielle and his largely acoustic songs have a far looser, bluesier feel. Also — oh yeah — JD’d probably kill to get a doom metal instrumental like “Giant’s Despair” onto one of his albums.


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tHur 4/14 Point entertainMent Presents:

[ New aNd Improved ]

psychedelic era, concert posters have been yet another place for art and music to collide. “Sonic Textures,” PhilaMOCA’s exploration of the (literal) pageantry of concert promotion, runs throughout the month of April, but this gallery night adds a special layer of musical appreciation to the mix: a screening of selections from Billy Martin’s (Medeski, Martin & Wood) performance documentary, Life on Drums. For musicians and newcomers alike, Martin’s film features a visit from his very first percussion teacher, explorations of the possibilities contained within each kit, and showcases

JOe Pug

stranD oF oaks Fri 4/15

Wye Oak

Callers, seCret Mountains Downstairs: FriDay Fire Power HaPPy Hour witH DJ BreakDown FroM 5-10P

[ the agenda ]

A full third of the places don’t serve alcohol and welcome all comers. Seven Stones is a good bet for a jolt of java and folk fest fave Mason Porter. Frog Holler, six country-rooted guys, play the best spot for liquor cognoscenti, Picasso. Ask the bartender’s advice and take it. Nashville songsmith returned home Craig Bickhardt offers the contemplative side of country at Towne House, while the Bullets work the polar opposite with serious rockabilly at Plumstead. Rock pioneer and Philly native Charlie Gracie settles in by the tanks at Iron Hill Brewery. At Joclyn’s, check out Philly Gumbo, who’ve spent decades perfecting their blend of all things roots. —Mary Armstrong

sat 4/16

Beach FOssils CraFt sPells

aM Downstairs: HillBilly Blues anD Country HaM FroM 11a-3P PM Downstairs: tiPs 4 teens witH DJs Jason, JeFFrey, anD Manny FroM 10P-2a sun 4/17

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straPPing FielDHanDs, HerMit tHrusHes Downstairs: 3rD sunDay- BrunCH witH CaPtain MarBles FroM 11a-3P Mon 4/18 Downstairs: 3rD MonDay- aPeritivo witH DJ slowPoke FroM 8P-MiDnigHt tue 4/19 Downstairs: 3rD tuesDay- newt lynn anD Ben DiCkey revolve reCorDs FroM 8P-MiDnigHt weD 4/20

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of Martin’s compositions and improvisations. The fusion of art and music in both presentations brings continuity to this night of cultural re-examination. The oft-overlooked artistry of concert posters and the usual background positioning of the drummer suggests that both subjects were overdue for some spotlight. Live performances from Ghost/Light and Girls Rock Philly will complete the multisensory experience.

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A P R I L 1 4 - A P R I L 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

—Eric Schuman Gallery night Fri., April 15, 5-9 p.m., free, exhibit through April 27, Philadelphia Mausoleum of Contemporary Art, 351 N. 12th St., 267-519-9651, philamoca.org.

Sat., April 16, 7:30 p.m.-1 a.m., $15 advance, $20 day-of, State Street, Media, 610-566-5039, statestreetblues.com.

[ film ]

 THE INDEPENDENT ARTIST MOVEMENT IN CINEMATOGRAPHY It may not have the zingiest of titles, but this PIFA-related program of silent short films offers treasures galore, few of which are available on DVD. Perhaps most exciting is Alberto Cavalcanti’s Rien que les heures (Nothing But Time), one of the earliest and most durable “city symphonies,” which used rhythmic editing

SATURDAY

4.16 [ folk/roots/traditional ]

 ROOTS RAMBLE Technically not a festival, Media’s Roots Ramble still feels like a kickoff to fest season, what with all the fresh air you get wandering from one venue to another. The purchase of a wristlet opens the door to 15 locales on or right off trolleybisected State Street. If you travel with the under-21 crowd:

to bring the dormant metropolis to life. Life and Death of 9413 — A Hollywood Extra is a dazzling depiction of the dehumanizing nature of industrial labor, partly told using stark shadow puppetry. Co-director Slavo Vorkapich was famous for his montage sequences, like one in Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, that implanted avant-garde aesthetics within Hollywood product. Films by Hans Richter, Henri Storck


COMING UP: Steve Poltz 5/11, Chris Difford (Squeeze) 5/22, Jeffrey Gaines 6/3

THU 4/14 8:00

FRI 4/15 7:30 WXPN Welcomes

Mary Scholz

Joan as Police Woman

FRI 4/15 10:30

SAT 4/16 6:30 & 9:00 Pop/Jazz/Blues Vocalist

John Byrne

Suede

(with band)

SUN 4/17 7:30

FRI 4/22 7:30

Dwight & Nicole

featuring Karen Gross & Eddie Bruce

Ryan Montbleau

The Black Cat Cabaret

FRI 4/22 10:30

SAT 4/23 10:30

from Asylum Street Spa

(of The Figgs)

Hamell on Trial & Wammo WED 4/27 8:00

Jer Coons Jeff LeBlanc SAT 4/30 7:30

Antigone Rising

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HAPPY HOUR PROMO

Jen Hess

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215.238.0379

WEDNESDAY 4/20 Mark Karan (Ratdog) and Jemimah Puddleduck tickets available at triumpholdcity.ticketleap.com 215.625.0855 117 Chestnut St.Philadelphia, PA triumphbrewing.com facebook.com/triumpholdcity

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and others fill out a jaw-dropping 180-minute slate.

[ the agenda ]

â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Sam Adams Sat., April 16, 5 p.m., $8, International House, 3701 Chestnut St., 215-3875125, ihousephilly.org.

[ folk ]

 LION VERSUS Lion Versusâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; new record, Five Hearts, which arrives in a beautifully crafted hand-printed package complete with wax

lin and harmonica all wrapped around Hilary Whiteâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s gently smoky alto, will be manna for fans of Beirut, Andrew Bird, First Aid Kit and local psych-folk heroes Espers. This CD-release show, featuring like-minded Philly brethren, including the ever-fabulous Cuddle Magic, should be a great time to get acquainted. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;K. Ross Hoffman

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Sat., April 16, 9 p.m., $8, with Cuddle Magic, The Perseverance Jazz Band and The Horrible Department, North Star Bar, 2639 Poplar St., 215-7870488, northstarbar.com.

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SUNDAY seal and calligraphic insert, runs a compact 25 minutes, but thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s plenty enough time for the sweetly brooding sounds of the Philly-via-Savannah chamber-folk septet to work up a fine swampy simmer. The groupâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s intimate, intricate, spaciously droning and gypsy-tinged arrangements, full of dolorous strings, funeral brass, mando-

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14

36 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

A P R I L 1 4 - A P R I L 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

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Eddie w/ The Chasers 8 p.m. $20

Sat. 4/16- DJ LogicPresented by Ropeadope w/ Bodega, Kuf Knotz & A Love Electric 9 p.m. $12 adv/$15 D.O.S.

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Wed. 4/20- Billy Martin of Medeski/Martin/ Wood

Sat. 4/23- Mochipet w/ Sonic Spank & Beard-o-Bees (Jesse of Lotus) 9 p.m. $12 adv/$15 D.O.S.

15

FRI

SAT

feat. Brass Heaven as house band, $3 Hurricanes, New Orleans Food Specials & more

Fri. 4/22- Future Rock w/ Sub Swara & Ghost 9 p.m. $12 adv/$15 D.O.S.

DJ BRUCE & DJ ZIKA PlUS SPECIAl GUESTS FREE BEFORE 11, $3 AFTER

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Sun., April 17, 8 p.m., $8, with Macklemore and Ryan Lewis and Voss, Kung Fu Necktie, 1250 N. Front St., 215-291-4919, kungfunecktie.com.

 LES FILMS MUETS Local new-music ensemble Relâche has plenty of practice setting new music to old films, and their taste in both is exquisite. Sunday’s program, co-sponsored by PIFA and the Philadelphia Cinema Alliance, includes commissioned scores by Régis Huby, Chuck Holderman, Greg Bowers and Chris McGlumpy. Jazz violinist Huby’s composition accompanies The Mystery of the Rocks of Kador, a tense murder mystery with director Léonce Perret

three films by comic genius Max Linder (Max Takes a Picture, Love’s Surprises and Be My Wife) now sadly an obscure figure but one who was cited as a key influence by no less than Charlie Chaplin. —Sam Adams Sun., April 17, 3 and 7 p.m., $20-$25, Mandell Theater, Drexel University, 3141 Chestnut St., 215-574-8248, relache.org.

. .A

304 SOUTH ST. PHILA PA WWW.DOBBSPHILLY.COM

pri l

/ M ay

2011 ..

Thurs 4/14

The Wheels,The Fallen Troubadours,The Cold Roses, Keystone Mountain Boys, Larry Saklad

Fri 4/15

Frank Viele & The Manhattan Project, G. Calvin Weston Band,

The Parsnip Revolt,Tim Butler

Sat 4/16

food | classifieds

—Shaun Brady

[ the agenda ]

the agenda

(which just trumped his betterknown fellow Canadian rapper Drake for a Juno Award). It’s an apt intro, as the Kenyanborn, guitar-strumming MC presents a uniquely clear-eyed optimism in his rhymes, both socially conscious and selfdeprecating. He has the wit to turn from despairing the lack of women in rap to embarking on a stream-of-consciousness riff on his own name encompassing biblical namesake Shadrach, Sly Stallone, 50 Cent and Chaka Khan.

[ film ]

the naked city | feature | a&e

sometimes.” So sing The Three Degrees in a sample of their version of “Rose Garden” that leads off Shad’s latest, TSOL

The Better Half,

Danny Lynch Band, The Brett Talley Band, Hey Guy, Cranston Dean

Sun 4/17

More on:

as its villain and the camera as its hero. The plot hinges on a filmed reconstruction of the crime, an early realization of cinema’s power to not only capture truth but create it. The rest of the program comprises

citypaper.net

Underground Sundays Maze in Change, Enemy Eternal, Andre the Giant Seven Heads

Thurs 4/21

Gabrahm Vitek, Matt Koziol,  N O W P L AY I N G O N C P ’ S A & E B L O G : M A N C AV E , I AM WOMAN, ADVENTURES OF AN OPEN MIKER, LOL W I T H I T A N D M O R E — C I T YPA P E R . N E T / C R I T I C A L M A S S .

Matt Lipschultz, Drop Collective, James Popik/ Ten Foot Tall

Fri 4/22

58 Fury, Drop Anchor, Loner Eroded, Life Slides Down,

Five Times August,

Roger Delany, Phil La Placa

Sat 4/23

Lucky Dub, John & Brittany, Love Automatic, Close To Good, Geron Hoy

Thurs 4/28

Against Grace, Savior Soul, Airways, Da(Y)ma

Sat, April 16th 9pm, $5 Creem Circus and the Sparklers and the Beatoes

Every Tuesday, 8pm King of the Hill Pool Tournament Wed Nite Open Mic ‘Original Music’ 9pm w/ Dave Robins or Abe the Rockstarr MULTICADE IS HERE!! Happy Hour Mondays-Fridays 5-7pm $2.50 Kenzinger Pints & More! Beer of the Month Abita’s Purple Haze FREE WI-FI

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37

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Lamagier, Mike Pfeiffer and

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Sun, April 17th 6pm, $5 Watery Love,Pleasure Leftists and Spacin

Fri 4/29

The Associates, Chris Shutz + The Tourists, Melodime, Hannah Zaic

Sat 4/30

Kingsfoil, 2 Years Apart,Tune in Tokyo, Jaded Faith,

In The Blonde

Sun 5/1

Underground Sundays Power Theory, Infernal Opera Sinister Realm, Surgeon

Thurs 5/5

Dirty Dirt Baby, Urban Giants Philly Fusion Project The Missing Keys

Fri 5/6

Da Rezarekt, Wahnder Lust Keystoned, Christie Lenee Suzy Skarulis

Sat 5/7

Panic Years, New Motels The Shakers, Molehill

The Green Children

Blue Felix, Modern Wasteland


the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city food classifieds A P R I L 1 4 - A P R I L 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T

38 | P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R |

f&d

foodanddrink

portioncontrol By Drew Lazor

BE ITALIAN ³ JONATHAN WAXMAN DOES not sound like

the name of an Italian chef, and Jonathan Waxman does not look like one, either. He grew up Jewish in Berkeley, and when most people mention his name, it’s followed by hefty praise for one of America’s first culinary celebrities, the guy responsible for carrying seasonally conscious California cuisine to the East Coast and stripping the unnecessary formality out of big-city dining. But Waxman is undoubtedly an Italian chef, if the prolonged success of his New York restaurant Barbuto counts for anything. And his second cookbook, Italian, My Way (Simon & Schuster, April 5), does even more to prove this mettle to the masses, a collection of recipes that capitalize on the chef’s unfussy philosophy. “Jonathan made a reputation early on as a chef who really understood how to make his ingredients stand out,” writes Tom Colicchio, who was just starting his career when Waxman was clicking on all cylinders in the mid’80s, in My Way’s foreword. “In this way Jonathan has always been, without talking about it and maybe without realizing it himself, an Italian chef.” It’s an accurate insight into the cooking philosophy of Waxman, who visits Osteria on April 25 for a charity dinner benefitting Alex’s Lemonade Stand (a few seats still remain). With the exception of a few pages — a slow-braised leg of lamb, or the pizza dough that requires several days of planning — My Way’s recipes are quick, yet not dumbed down so much that the result is an uninspired dinner. Highlights of Waxman’s thoughtful style can be found among his pasta recipes, from timeless spaghetti alla carbonara to fava- and artichoke-blessed bucatini and a dumb-easy angel hair dish flavored with crab, jalapeño and mint. (It’s cake; just put everything in a bowl with butter, cook the pasta al dente, drop it into the bowl and toss with lemon and sea salt.) More ambitious home cooks might want to tangle with Waxman’s griddle-popped razor clams or his clever rendition on porchetta, which nixes the intense labor of handling an entire suckling pig in favor of treating pork loins in a similar manner. What stood out the most during our test cooks? Waxman’s amazing cauliflower — “one of the glories of Barbuto” — was so easy to make spectacular that it was almost inversely frustrating. Oven-roasted to an dizzying crisp with salt and pepper, garlic and olive oil, tossed with a bit of heavy cream near the end, then dumped into a bowl with toasted pine nuts and shaved Reggiano, it’s a memorable dish that, like all of Waxman’s cooking, relies on the distinct personalities of its ingredients. (drew.lazor@citypaper.net)

GRILL YOU KNOW IT’S TRUE: The parrillada juani, or Argentine mixed grill, is a tasty way to try all of 943 chef/owner Pascual Cancelliere’s killer meat preparations. NEAL SANTOS

[ review ]

9 LIVES It took long enough, but easy Arge-talian Café 943 is finally cooking. By Adam Erace CAFÉ 943 | 943 S. Ninth St., 215-925-0900, twitter.com/943BYOB.

Lunch served Fri.-Sun., noon-4 p.m.; dinner served Tue.-Thu., 5-10 p.m. and Fri.-Sat., 5-11 p.m. Appetizers, $6-$11; entrées, $16-$22 and $50; desserts, $5.

I

t’s not the best omen when a server starts her spiel with, “First let me tell you what we’re out of.” Two meals. Two waitresses. Both began this way at Café 943, an affable Argentine/Italian BYOB that took two years to come into existence. More on: Blame the delay on a perfect storm of contractor drama and L&I red tape, but 943 is finally open: water pitchers filled to the brim, lilac Gerber daises on the tables, Ninth Street-facing windows Windexed to a crystal shine. This well-scrubbed charmer and its 42-year-old chef/owner, Pascual “Pat” Cancelliere, are ready, willing, waiting. Problem is, in the drawn-out-as-Mad Men’s-hiatus holdup, people seem to have forgotten 943 was even going to open at all. Prime time on a weeknight, ghosts filled the buttercream-colored room. My table was the lone server’s only charge, and while listing the 86’d items after a perfunctory hello, she projected the kind of gloom that comes from standing around doing nothing for hours. I couldn’t blame her.

citypaper.net

They were out of tuna. They were out of Milanesa de carne. They were out of the empanadas (Cancelliere’s Buenos Aires-born mom makes them). The octopus “Don Giovanni,” named for Cancelliere’s Italian-born father, would not be served with favas but with lessexciting chickpeas. There was but one dessert, a walnut-studded scoop of chocolate-banana gelato from Anthony’s up the block. Maybe it was the missing dishes, the somber service, the afterdark ghostliness of the Italian Market just beyond the windows, or a combination: Though very much open for business, in many respects 943 felt like a restaurant on the brink of closing. Then the food started coming. Lemon and parsley and silky olive oil. Fennel and garlic, sweet and smoked paprikas. Pink shrimp sautéed in some of the dishes, easy-to-love mussels steamed with others. Before I knew it, we depleted two MORE FOOD AND baskets of sliced baguette (a disappearDRINK COVERAGE ance aided by the zesty, oregano-laced AT C I T Y P A P E R . N E T / salsa criolla), and 943 felt very alive. M E A LT I C K E T. Even without the favas, the octopus was electric. Tomato, fennel and saffron shone through the longlegged beauty’s skin-deep (the grill) and topical (smoked paprika and smoked salt) smoke, and I loved how the garbanzos ruptured individually, releasing their creamy interiors like capsules of hummus. This particular prep is named for Cancelliere’s father, a lifelong restaurateur, because, “At one of his pizzerias, he put this octopus on one of the pies. That was probably back in 1975. I never forgot that.” I don’t think I’ll forget it, either. Born in Italy and raised in Buenos Aires, Giovanni Cancelliere was ahead of his time, whether putting cephalopod on pizza or >>> continued on adjacent page


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gracetavern.com


BASEBALL SEASON

HEY Stop calling and texting my boyfriend PLEASE! Neither of us wants to hear from you or even about you. Sorry that things happened this way but you are a grown woman and need to act like it—that means leaving him alone and going on with your life! How do you expect to get over it if you keep texting inane things? I’m praying for you and asking for peace!

weren’t for the fucking customers.” Let’s review some basics: 1. If you pick something up, put it back where you found it, not across the store. 2. If you wouldn’t buy something that looks opened, DON’T FUCKING OPEN ONE TO LOOK AT IT! 3. Keep in mind the theme of a store, if it is adult themed, leave your children outside, no one wants to shop for porn while a 4 year old is staring at them. 4. This should be a no brainer, but you would be surprised, if someone tells you that you can’t have food in the store, that does NOT mean just go stand near the door and finish it, it means GTFO! And seriously, don’t open the fake vaginas.

BEY-BEY KIDS I am sick and tried of trying to talk to you while you have your kids in the background screaming and talking around you when I am trying to talk. We just reconnected and it feels like I am competing trying to talk to you and your are screaming talking to your kids. Obviously, your kids are no being discipline by you because if they were it would be quiet while you are on the phone. PS: They need to get their asses whipped one good time instead of you yelling all the time!

YEAH I SAID IT

CITY SPORTS

DON’T CALL ME WHEN

YOU’RE A PIG

SICK OF THE

At one point of time I was thinking that you were my best-friend but I quickly realized that it is my mom and dad that are my best-friends. Basically, I think that you are a loser that doesn’t want anything and that you use that term, kindness of a stranger alittle too much! I hate the fact that you are so phony, phony with everything. I don’t accept that fact that you just don’t care or that you are real busy cause you are not. I think all you do all day is play with you smelly pussy and smell your fingers all day!

“The eyes of a desperate man” I love philly,for the most part.Yes,”kiladelph”is known for it’s violence,drugs and poverty,but I’m big into music and art so it seems like the spot for me.HOWEVER,it’s one thing to be down and out and ask for some help from a complete stranger,but the down and out people of this city have taken it to the extremes.I am “down and out” and I tend to be in places among other people that are in my shoes and I cannot stand these homeless,ignorant people who have the nerve to think somebody owes them the fuck something.If you are physically and mentally able to work than GET A FUCKING JOB!or some kind of hustle.Shit,go fucking rob a bank if you need money that bad.Just don’t fucking ask me cause I’m

PHILLY RETAIL CUSTOMERS! To quote Clerks. “This job would be great if it

To place your FREE ad (100 word limit), go to citypaper.net/ILUIHU and follow the prompts. ADS ALSO APPEAR AT CITYPAPER.NET/lovehate. City Paper has the right to re-publish “I Love You, I Hate You”™ ads at the publisher’s discretion. This includes re-purposing the ads for online publication, or for any other ancillary publishing projects.

41

HEY GIRLFRIEND!

You are a fucking pig and you know that you are... I hate the fact that people ask you to go somewhere months before hand, you agree to go and then fucking wham you call me the day of party and say that you are nor going to go because you are at home preparing for inspection and that you are also preparing for someone to come over and fuck you! What kind of shit is that...I just go so disgusted when I heard your voicemail. I really just wanted to punch you in the face! Who the fuck do you think you are? I think you are a fucking pig, setting up two different guys to fuck on the same day! You are a loser and you always will be a loser! Do me a favor please lose my phone number.

P h i l a d e l P h i a C i t y Pa P e r | A P R I L 1 4 - A P R I L 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C i t y Pa P e r . n e t |

Your wife is a fucking beast and I meant that shit! Oh how I wish that you could read my words where-ever you are! You think that I am jealous and I am not, the point being is that I was madly in love with you and you might not think that it is true but I am in love with you! I knew that I was in love with you when I saw you when I was alittle kid. I thought to myself how I would love to marry you and be with you! Then you married a beast...you said you always loved me but didn’t even look to find me! I am just over the whole thing! It really doesn’t matter to me anymore... what is done is done and there is nothing that I can do about it but accept it...no worries I am sure you and your beast with live happily ever after!

Since I first spoke with about my Five Fingers, you could’ve had me in the palm of your hand. That’s if I had the balls to tell you how, I thought u were ubelievably sexy! You remembered my size in Vibrams from almost a year ago and that’s how long I’ve wanted to ask you out. I have a ton of athletic gear but you give me a reason to buy more. You’ll always have a 6’7” yoga customer that can’t stop blushing when he sees you... super sexy Jess. F.

Dear Drivers, I really, really try not to be a bitch when riding my bike. I try to obey all traffic laws and not inconvenience you in the cars because (a) I realize cars can do much more damage to me than I can to them, and (b) I know you deal with a lot of asshole bikers and I try not to be one of them. However, this is a two-way street. There are certain places where I can only go so far to the side of the road without being on the sidewalk (which, by the way, is illegal, so don’t tell me to stay on the sidewalk), and please don’t try to parent me when I am on the road. It’s really annoying. I know not wearing a helmet is dangerous, I just

When you want to cheat on your girlfriend, you do it with skanks you meet at the bar, NOT your employees. Especially not your teenage employee who’s had a thing for you since day one and happened to be wasted. You’re borderline middle aged! COME ON. Act your age.

I am sick of hearing of people talk about the weather when the temperatures goes way about high normal. Everybody wants to sit on the steps and complain, but guess what people, it is still fucking Spring time. If you haven’t noticed by now, refresh what the definition is of Spring! Spring time is when temperatures fluxuate and changes day to day. That means you dumb assholes can get sick in this weather! That means you should not be wearing shorts, half belly shirts or dressing like tramp-bitches! So keep this in mind when you are out and about because it is not fucking SUMMER dummies!

To the people who like to use their cell phones while they are walking and/or are on the bus texting and talking! I got a message for you...next time I see you on your phone texting and you stop walking in front of me I am going to push you to the ground and walk over and smash your cell phone!

FROM ONE BIKE TO ALL DRIVERS

TO MY DUMBASS BOSS

WEATHER

CELL PHONE IDIOTS

You are sick...it is funny how you are sick and or in the hospital you call me. I do not wanna hear about your illnesses and you feeling depressed. I got my own damn problems. If you want someone to talk to or heat about your depressed state of mind. Call your minister or better yet since you are in the hospital get one of those priest or ministers in the hospital and talk to them! By the way I am still waiting for the money that you owe me! So if you wanna call me next time, it better be about me getting my money.

in the same boat you’re in,I just chose to keep some composure about myself.You make the city look bad and it’s bad enough!If you don’t have a token,use your two fucking legs and walk.If you can’t afford cigarettes then quit.If your are hungry walk to a place that serves food,there’s plenty of them around. Don’t you get tired of asking people for their money that they worked for all day long.I’m the fuck sick of being stared at with your desperate eyes waiting for you to ask me for something.Where’s your fucking self-pride man?

classifieds

I hate baseball season because of the wild and rowdy fans that I have to deal with while riding the train. Since it seems that septa wants to cater to baseball fans going to the game by providing them with the special express trains going to the baseball stadium septa should provide express trains for people who get off from work late at night and don’t give me no dumb ass excuses because I know you have the money because I seen the express trains running at night after a game. If everyone got to ride the local trains at night, so should the people coming out of the game! Basically, everyone should get the same treatment, it would get everyone home faster! Alot!

don’t care that much. So drive on all motor vehicles, I have no problems with you. Just please try to be nicer when you see a bicycle on the road.

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

[ i love you, i hate you ]


food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

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lulueightball By Emily Flake

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Show us your Philly. Submit snapshots of the City of Brotherly Love, however you see it, at: photostream@citypaper.net

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©2011 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com)

39 Insurance company with a duck mascot 40 Car lover, slangily 41 Pro golfer Ernie 42 Ending for super 47 Stick around 48 Military helicopter 49 ___ Island (Puget Sound locale) 50 ___ perpetua (Idaho’s motto) 54 Monopoly board corner 55 “If all ___ fails...” 56 Thespian’s task 57 Yes-___ question 59 Alero maker 62 F-f-freezing 63 Quick swim 64 Actress Longoria 65 Sunbeam

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STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA COUNTY OF COLLETON IN THE FAMILY COURT OF THE FOURTEENTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT DOCKET NO.: 11-DR— SUMMONS EVA DRAYTON BEST, Plaintiffs, vs. GRACE KELLY, ALEX BROWN, and JOHN DOE, Defendant TO: Grace Kelly, Alex Brown, and John Doe, Defendant abovenamed: YOU ARE HEREBY SUMMONED and required to answer the Complaint in this action, a copy of which is herewith served upon you, and to serve a copy of your Answer to the Complaint upon the subscriber at GIST LAW FIRM, PO Box30007, Columbia, South Carolina 29230, within thirty (30) days after the service hereof, exclusive of the day of such service. If you fail to answer the Complaint within that time, the Plaintiff shall apply to the Court for a judgment by default against you for the relief demanded in the Complaint. GIST LAW FIRM DEANDREA GIST BENJAMIN P.O. Box 30007 Columbia, SC 29230 (803) 771-8007 Columbia, South Carolina YOU WILL PLEASE TAKE NOTICE THAT A HEARING HAD BEEN SET IN THE ABOVE CAPTIONED MATTER ON: HEARING DATE: MAY 3, 2011 TIME: 3:30 pm You are hereby notified to be present at Colleton County Family Court. 101 Hampton Street in Walterboro, S.C, at the time noted above. TIME ALLOTTED: 30 MINUTES TYPE OF HEARING: TEMPORARY RELIEF

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FLEA MARKET Sat May 14 at Overbrook Presbyterian Church. Intersection of City

jobs

hoUSEhoLd itEMS foR SALE

Furniture, Tools, China, Art. April 16th, 10am-4pm and April 17th 1-4pm. 732 Catharine Street. 215-413-1119

Flea Markets fLEA MARkEt

home Services

Multi Family Flea Market. Saturday April 16th, 2011, 1000 Cross Street, Philadelphia, PA. 9am-3pm . Contact: Amanda Olsen 610-420-4130 or email :amandaeolsen @ gmail.com

health Services hEALth/MEdiCAL

VIAGRA 100MG and CIALIS 20 mg!! 40 Pills +4 Free on $99.00 #1 Male Enhancement, Discreet Shipping. Only #2.70/pill. Buy The Blue Pill Now! 1-888-777-9242.

help Wanted hELp WAntEd

“Can you Dig It?” Heavy Equipment School. 3wk training program. Backhoes, Bulldozers, Trackhoes. Local job placement asst. Start digging dirt Now! 866-362-6497. hELp WAntEd

**ABLE TO TRAVEL** Hiring 10 people, Free to travel all states, resort areas. No experience necessary. Paid training & transpor tation. OVER 18. Start ASAP. 1-970773-3165. hELp WAntEd

Between High School and College? Over 18? Drop that level position. Earn what you’re worth!!! Travel w/Successful, young business group. Paid Training, Transpor tation,

Wayne’s World

A BETTER WAY TO MOVE

“You call and we haul!” • Moving & Hauling • Scrap Metal • Clean Out • Junk Removal • We Move Everything…

215-989-7176

Loews Philadelphia Hotel is looking for experienced cooks. The ideal candidates must have culinary training and background in an upscale hotel or freestanding restaurant.

OPEN POSITIONS:

E-mail:phihr@loewshotels.com 1200 Market Street, Philadelphia, PA 19107 AA/EOE – M/F/D/V

poSt A job $15 foR 30 dAyS!

FREE Brochure. Call NOW! 1-800-532-6546 Ext. 97 www. continentalacademy.com.

ALL BUSINESS TRANSPORTATION ENTERPRISES

Benefits: * 401K* Insurance Coverage * Life Insurance * Holiday and Vacation Pay * Tuition Assistance Programs * Complimentary Lunch * And many more great benefits!

(NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE) Job Hotline: 215-231-7263 Apply Mondays: 2:30 P.M. – 5:30 P.M. Fax: (215) 231-7308

Business Services

Restaurant Lead Cook Restaurant Cook Banquet Cook Banquet Cook Apprentice www.loewshotels.com

24 Hr. 215-669-3415

gently moving your earthly possessions

215.670.9535

www.mambomovers.com

Piano Specialist! Great Rates! LAST MINUTE JOBS ALWAYS AVAILABLE


HELP WANTED

FOREMEN to lead utility field crews. Outdoor physical work, many positions, paid training, $17/hr. plus weekly performance bonuses after promotion, living allowance when traveling, company truck and benefits. Must have strong leadership skills, good driving history, and able to travel in Pennsylvania and nearby States. Email resume to Recruiter4@osmose.com or apply online at www.OsmoseUtilities.com EOE M/F/D/V.

HELP WANTED DRIVER

INTERMODAL Opportunities! Run trailers to/from Rail Yards. Pay: $800-$960/wk. Weekly Hometime! Prior Reefer experience plus: CDL-A & HazMat required. EEOE/AAP 866370-4469 www.Drive4Marten. com. HELP WANTED DRIVER

Need CDL Drivers A or B with 2 yrs. recent commercial experience to transfer motor homes, straight trucks, and tractors. www.mamotransportation.com 1-800-501-3783. HELP WANTED DRIVER

New Pay for Company Drivers & Contractors: Earn More Now! Regional Runs, Excellent Miles, Weekly Hometime, New Equipment. CDL-A, 6mo. Experience required. EEOE/ AAP 866-322-4039 www. Drive4Marten.com.

$$$ HELP WANTED $$$

HELP WANTED DRIVER

Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800-4057619 Ext. 2450 http://www. easywork-greatpay.com. HELP WANTED DRIVER

DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T MISS A PAYCHECK! FLATBED. $750 p/WK GUARANTEED 1st 2Wks. Employed! 1 Yr. OTR @ Class A CDL Reqd. Excellent Compensation. 888-472-3218 or gicc. chiefind.com. HELP WANTED DRIVER

Driver-Experienced OTR Drivers. Up to $4000 BONUS. $3500 Sign-on CASH and $500 LAPTOP or GPS. Up to $.50 Per Mile. Regional Lanes/Home Weekly 888463-3962. 6Mo. OTR Exp. & Current CDL ww.usatruck. jobs. eoe m/f/h/v HELP WANTED DRIVER

Driver-New Trucks +Flexible Days Off + Paid Daily. Looking for Drivers who are Looking for Miles + Full Benefits. CDL-A. 3 months recent experience required. 800-414-9569. www. driveknight.com. HELP WANTED DRIVER

Drivers-No Experience-No Problem. 100% Paid CDL Training. Immediate Benefits. 20/10 program. Trainers Earn up to $.49 per mile! CRST VAN EXPEDITED 800-326-2778 www.JoinCRST.com.

NEW STARTING PAY JUST ANNOUNCED for Van and Flatbed Division. Plus high miles, new equipment and excellent benefits. $500 SignOn Bonus for Flatbed. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got it all! CDL-A. 6mo. OTR. 888-801-5295, HELP WANTED DRIVER

OWNER POPERATORS: 85% of Gross. 40% Advance of Loads. No Forced Dispatch. Trailer Rental Program. Low Cost Insurance Available. Flatbed, Dry-Van, Specialized. JRC 866-572-7297, www.jrctransportation.com. HELP WANTED DRIVER

TRUCK DRIVERS WANTED! 2011 PAY RAISE! UP TO $.52 PER MILE! HOME WEEKENDS! EXCELLENT BENEFITS! NEW EQUIPMENT! HEARTLAND EXPRESS 1-800-441-4953 www.heartlandexpress.com PAID IN ADVANCE!

Make $1,000 a Week mailing brochures from home! Guaranteed Income! FREE Supplies! No experience required. Star t Immediately! www. homemailerprogram.net WORK FROM HOME

Make up to $1,000 Weekly. No Experience Needed. WE TRAIN YOU For More Info, Please Contact: JAKE $$ 267-444-8171 $$

Homes for Sale NORTHERN LIBERTIES

306 West Wildey St. Duplex 2 Bdrm 1 Bth. CA yard deck. $375,000. Call John 302-2505375.

Land/ Lots for Sale LAND FOR SALE

NYS LAND ONE TIME SALE 10ac-Salmon River Area-$19,995. 7ac w/New Cabin-$29,995. 5ac-Hickory Ridge-$12,995. 14ac-Southern Tier-$24,995. 5ac on Big River-$39,995. 1ac-Little Falls-$19,995. 14ac-Southern Tier-$27,995. 5ac on Big River-$39,995. 1ac-Little Falls-$19,995. Over 100 new properties offered! Terms or cash discounts! Call Christmas & Associates 800-2297843. Or visit www.LandandCamps.com.

â&#x17E;¤

rentals

Apartments for Rent 22XX BAINBRIDGE STREET

Brownstone, newly remodeled. 5 bdrm, 2 full baths. $2959 per month. Available immediately. 215-549-9498.

A 836 MERCER ST. (FISHTOWN)

BEAUTIFUL, MODERN 3 BEDROOM, ROW-HOME, N E W LY R E M O D E L E D . BACKYARD, BASEMENT, AVAILABLE IMMEDIATELY. $1000 A MONTH + UTILITIES CLOSE TO CENTER CITY & OLD CITY. 215-498-2383.

1813 TULIP STREET (FISHTOWN LOCATION)

BEAUTIFULLY RENOVATED 2BDM 1 BATH, NEW WALL TO WALL FRESH PAINT MODERN KITCHEN,

1SPGFTTJPOBM4FSWJDFT

Roommates

/2 @22; /F :<?2 A5.; % 06AF =.=2? ?2.12?@ 3<? .@ 96AA92 .@ !D228

800 Square Feet in Old City. Major Visibility. (267) 9395313.

ALL AREAS-ROOMATES. COM

Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: http:// www.Roommates.com.

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Vacation/ Seasonal Rental

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VACATION RENTALS

NORTH WILDWOOD, NJFLORENTINE FAMILY MOTEL Beach/Boardwalk Block, Heated Pools, Efficiency/Motel units refrigerator, elevator. Color Brochure/Specials 609522-4075 DEPT. 104 www. florentinemotel.com.

$99/month. $0 down, $0 interest, golf course, national parks. 1 hour from Tucson Intâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;l airport. Guaranteed financing, no credit checks. Pre-recorded msg. 800-631-8164 code 4057 www.sunsiteslandrush.com. 20 Acres-$0 Down!! $99/mo. ONLY $12.900. Near Growing EL Paso, Texas (2nd safest U.S. City). Owner Financing, No Credit Checks. Money Back Guarantee! FREE Color Brochure. 800-755-8953. www.sunsetranches.com.

:\`a 6[`b_N[PR` .PPR]aRQ 6[PYbQV[T .PPR`` N[Q 8Rf`a\[R :R_Pf Center City Office NOW OPEN! Two Penn Center, Suite 200 Philadelphia

Accessible Recovery Services dddN_``bO\e\[RP\Z

STOP

BILL COLLECTORS FROM CALLING & HARASSING YOU & RECEIVE UP TO $1,000. NO ATTORNEYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S FEES/COST TO YOU. BW Consumer Lawyers Attorneys Blitshtein & Weiss

SCCS, INC.

Local Moving, Hauling & Cleanout Services. Call for Free Estimates

(267) 251-7745 www.sccsmoving.com www.sccs-contractors.com

Protect & Beautify Your Home With Ornamental Iron

Flower Boxes Window Guards Railings

/.9:2?¡@ 6?<; 215/954/8992 . Rbalmer@arbill.com

The Law Offices of Debra D. Rainey

The Compassionate Lawyer CRIMINAL LAW FAMILY LAW IMMIGRATION LAW EMPLOYMENT LAW GENERAL PRACTICE BUSINESS LAW

One Penn Center 1617 JFK Blvd., Suite 1010 Philadelphia PA, 19103

Offices in Philadelphia and Southampton. Serving Philadelphia, Bucks, Montgomery, Chester and Delaware Counties.

215-972-8700 www.DebraRaineyLaw.com

If Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve Been Injured, Arrested, or Wronged at Work

William A. Torchia, Esquire ConCierge LegaL ServiCeS generaL PraCtiCe â&#x20AC;&#x201C; eState & tax PLanning

1420 Walnut Street, Suite 1216 215-546-1950; watorchia@gmail.com Williamtorchiaesquire.vpweb.com

Call Attorney

Derek Steenson 877- 466- 3937

FREE CONSULTATION

To advertise, call Chris at 215-825-2486.

53

Cell: 215-240-2041

ARS will get you the help you needâ&#x20AC;Śnow.

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | A P R I L 1 4 - A P R I L 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

Free Towing Same Day Used Vehicles and Parts for Sale

Office: 267-324-3633

@B/<E<;2 A?2.A:2;A

=YRN`R PNYY' %%% &!$ % #aU N[Q :N_XRa ?VTUa [RN_ @bOb_ON[ @aNaV\[

215-364-4900

TOP $$$ FOR COMPLETE

-RADIATORS FILLED & BLED-

Mention ad for 10% discount 10% discount for Police, Fire, and Active Military

BIG BEAUTIFUL AZ LAND

JUNK CARS & TRUCKS

PLUMBING & HEATING

Vitamins, Nutrition Supplements, Drinks, Gluten Free Foods

@A.;¡@ 52.9A5 3<<1@

Real Estate Marketplace

RASCO

â&#x20AC;˘BATHROOMS â&#x20AC;˘SEWER LINES â&#x20AC;˘WATER SERVICES â&#x20AC;˘House Heater & Water Tanks Repaired & Installed â&#x20AC;˘24 Hour Emergency Service â&#x20AC;˘Free Estimates â&#x20AC;˘Senior Citizen Discount â&#x20AC;˘Licensed & Insured â&#x20AC;˘No Job Too Small

Specializing in Body Building Supplements 7161 Frankford Ave Philadelphia, PA 19135 215-332-4577

GALLERY SPACE FOR RENT

AUTO SALVAGE

267-972-1398. 215-744-2131 Fax 3711 Sepviva Street Philadelphia, PA. 19137

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Commerical/ Warehouse

REAL ESTATE

Homes

-FHBM'JMFT

classifieds

REAL ESTATE APPRAISERS: Certified w/minimum 5yrs experience & ACI knowledge to cover Eastern, PA. Fax resume: 800-675-9392 Or Call: 800-477-5187.

HELP WANTED

real estate

â&#x17E;¤

BASEMENT, SMALL YARD. $875 MONTH + UTILITIES. AVAILABLE IMMEDIATELY. 215-498-2383.

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

Lodging Provided. 1-877646-5050.


Where to Live

Welcome

To The Wellington At Rittenhouse Square

classifieds

food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city

Welcome Weekend |

the new

city

paper

Magnificent Square View Apartments! Studios,1, 2 & 3 Bedrooms Two Year Lease at Same Rate. All Utilities Included. Pet Friendly

net

54 | P h i l a d e l P h i a C i t y Pa P e r |

a p r i l 1 4 - a p r i l 2 0 , 2 0 1 1 | C i t y Pa P e r . n e t

19th & Walnut Streets Philadelphia PA 19103 (215) 567-7810

Center City 2323 Race Street

Experience Center City’s Distinctive Apartments And Townhomes Overlooking The Schuylkill River Ask About Our “Welcome Weekend” Specials

866.906.9543 // EdgewaterAptHomes.com


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billboard [ C I T Y PA P E R ]

APRIL 14 - APRIL 20, 2011 CALL 215-735-8444

ALL NUDE UPSCALE GENTLEMENâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S CLUB

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SCHOOL OF ROCK FREE TRIAL LESSON! 267-639-4007 Building Blocks to Total Fitness 12 Years of experience. Offering personal fitness training, nutrition counseling, and flexibility training. Specialize in osteoporosis, injuries, special needs. In home or at 12th Street Gym. Infokol@aol.com

DANCERS WANTED

Flexible hours, will train, no experience necessary, excellent pay, safe/secure environment. Call (609) 707-6075

Efn?`i`e^;XeZ\ij :Xcc+/+$)*0$----

can help you make decisions with more clarity, achieve your goals more quickly, and do so with less stress. Free half-hour consultation â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 215 806 8319

I BUY RECORDS, CDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S, DVDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S

TOP PRICES PAID. No collection too small or large! We buy everything! Call Jon at 215-805-8001 or e-mail dingo15@hotmail.com

MAKE US AN OFFER WE CANâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T REFUSE SALE!

FRANKINSTIEN BIKE WORX 215-893-0415 1529 SPRUCE STREET BREAK AWAY FROM BOUTIQUE PRICES AND SERVICE!

TEQUILA SUNRISE RECORDS

½ PRICED DRAFTS WEEKDAYS 5-7PM



17 Rotating Drafts Close to 200 Bottles 

www.devilsdenphilly.com www.facebook.com/devilsdenphilly www.twitter.com/devilsdenphilly

525 West Girard Ave VINYL AND CD SPECIALISTS CLASSIC & MODERN GLOBAL SOUNDS HOUSE TECHNO DUBSTEP DUB DISCO FUNK SOUL JAZZ DIY PUNK LSD ROCK AND LIGHT HARMONY ROOTS BLUES NOISE AVANT AND MORE TUESDAY-SUNDAY 12-6PM 01-215-965-9616

Executives, Etc. Massage Services, Etc.

Quality Company. Quality Time. YOUR Location, 24:7 Cash & Credit Cards Accepted Call Now: 215-969-4759 edenlove.friendlynow.com

happy hour 5-7pm nightly [ Items priced from $2 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; $6 ea. ]

220 S. 17th Street (215) 790-1799 tavern17restaurant.com

$2 - cheeseburger slIders $3 - drafts $4 - cocktaIl $5 - wIne $6 - snow crabs (8 to 10 oz)

CAL SCHENKEL SATURDAY APRIL 16 RARE ZAPPA RECORDS & ART FOR SALE Gold Million â&#x20AC;˘ Bryn Mawr 610-525-4500

FAST FORWARD

Jamie Moffett Media Design & Production Motion picture, promotionals, music videos http://jamiemoffett.com

SILK CITY

Business coaching

1075 Albany Ave. A.C. Nj 609-340-0252 www.atlanticcityallure.com

MEET FRANK ZAPPA ARTIST

DINER â&#x20AC;˘ LOUNGE THIS WEEKEND 4.15 - 4.17.11 FRIDAY:

SO SPECIAL DJs EMYND & BO BLIZ

SPECIAL GUEST: STRETCH ARMSTRONG

SPRING TUNE UP SPECIAL $35 plus tax VOLPE CYCLES 115 S. 22nd Street 8am-9pm Mon-Fri, 9am-6pm Sat-Sun May not be combined with other offers. Visit www.volpecycles.com for details.

Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re Not A Tech Head....

but youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d like to make life easier with the help of technology. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know where to start? Whether you own a small business, or just need some advice for home, Guidewire can help. Let Guidewire assist you in finding the perfect technology oriented solution you need today. wayne@guidewireservices.com

Private Yoga Sessions

Ideal for beginners looking for individual attention email for more information sascat3@gmail.com

RoadHouse Radio

SATURDAY:

DJ DEEJAY

Tune in Tuesdays 103.3 FM from 1-4pm www.WPRB.com

SUNDAE NITE DJs LEE JONES & DIRTY

STUDY GUITAR W/ THE BEST

SUNDAY:

Open every day 4pm - 2am Sat & Sun Brunch 10am - 4pm 5th & Spring Garden www.silkcityphilly.com

HOOKAH BAR/RESTAURANT HIDDEN CAFE 328 SOUTH STREET (215) 413-2486

RECLAIMED TIMBER BENCHES ON STEEL LEGS Designed by local architect. Hand made with an elegant emphasis on detail to connections & materiality. Great for dining rooms, kitchens, the foot of the bed or your garden. For inquires & literature, call 215.923.1115

All Styles All Levels. Former Berklee faculty member. Masters Degree with 25 yrs. teaching experience. 215.831.8640 www.davidjoel.net

ROXY GUITAR

Premier Boutique Guitar Shop. 7026 Ridge Ave 19128 215-483-1889

CORSETS & CLUBWEAR

12 designers - 200+ steel boned corsets in stock size S-8XL Menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s leather - kilts - costumes PASSIONAL Boutique 704 S. 5th St. Noon-10PM 7 days www.passionalboutique.com

SEMEN DONORS NEEDED

Healthy, College Educated Men 18-39 ~ $150/Sample WWW.123DONATE.COM

7&3:(00% â&#x20AC;&#x153;..#&&3-*45)"4(308/ 50&1*$1301035*0/4 ,*5$)&/)"4"%%&% "/&953"#&-- 8*5)1&3)"145)& $*5:Âľ4#&45'3*5&4  40.&45&--"3#&&3 #"55&3&%'*4)"/% 7&3:(00%.644&-4Âł Craig LeBan, Philadelphia Inquirer, Revisited April 2007

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Philadelphia City Paper, April 14th, 2011  

Philadelphia's Trusted News and Entertainment Source.

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