December 28, 2016 - Pittsburgh City Paper

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vorite Hitchcock work. Dec. 29-Jan. 3 and Jan. 5. Row House Cinema

FILM CAPSULES CP

BREAD AND TULIPS. In Silvio Soldini’s 2000 comedy, a housewife, left behind on a bus tour, decides to start a new life for herself in Venice. In Italian, with subtitles. Jan. 6-8, Jan. 10 and Jan. 12. Row House Cinema

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NEW ASSASSIN’S CREED. I imagine the actor Michael Fassbender in his off hours, sitting by a crackling fire brooding over poetry with a glass of brown nearby. But after sitting through this head-scratching actioner — an elaborate 15thcentury cosplay married to a Dan Brown thriller that is, in fact, adapted from a video game — I have adjusted my reveries: Fassbender must play Assassin’s Creed non-stop. It’s the only explanation for why he’d sign on to this mess. (If history teaches us anything, it is that no good movie has ever been made from a video game.) At least he has fine company: Marion Cotillard, Jeremy Irons, Brendan Gleeson, Charlotte Rampling and Michael K. Williams also put in appearances. I’d prefer to see this top-caliber crew chew over a morally ambiguous courtroom drama, but narrative gobblygook awaits! After a couple of prologues — one set in the 1400s, the other in 1986 Baja California — we scuttle ahead to the present, where Cal (Fassbender) is being executed in prison. Instead of dying, he wakes up in a different sort of confinement — a research joint in Spain where a father and daughter team (Irons and Cotillard) are searching for “the cure for violence.” Toward this, they have rounded up the descendants of an infamous assassin group, which includes Cal, to explore these baddies at the genetic level. They hook up Cal to a virtual-reality machine known as the animus, which causes him to relive exciting times in 1492 as his ancestor, Aguilar. Why? Because that’s the year that the assassins grabbed and hid “the apple of Eden,” a gizmo that is the origin of free will; the institute folks hope Cal/Aguilar will lead them to it. Director Justin Kurzel splits the action between the past and the present, and spends plenty of the budget on old-world Andalusian set pieces and costumes. The assassins have groovy hooded outfits, are very good with swords and knives, and practice a particularly fun form of parkour with lots of body flips. (You need crazy cardio to be an assassin!) Their arch-enemies are the Knights Templar, the original “Say ‘Merry Christmas’!” cranks. It’s a lot less confusing than the present, where I could never even figure out who was the bad guy, what purpose Cal had or what you’d do with an apple full of free will anyhow. The most succinct aspect of the conclusion was that this muddled film is remaining ready for its likely unwanted sequel. (Al Hoff)

LA NOTTE. An unfaithful married couple (Marcello Mastroiani and Jeanne Moreau) experience another night of their deteriorating relationship, in Michelangelo Antonioni’s 1961 drama. In Italian, with subtitles. Jan. 6-9 and Jan. 11-12. Row House Cinema

Assassin’s Creed man-child (he steals a Christmas tree, naughty boy!); gags that announce themselves hours in advance (countdown to the moose-floating-in-moose-urine piece of art breaking …); and yet another Steve Aoki cameo. This meet-the-parents (ahem) riff has been done better before (and didn’t require the presence of two members of a 1970s rock quartet awkwardly airlifted into the last reel). If you’re simply going for the raunchy humor, you should also lower your expectations: You’ve heard it all before. At least the movie cops to the out-of-date set-up — that we’re watching a father and a potential husband fight over who gets the woman, though this isn’t setttled until the final scenes. Some decent comic actors are lost in this, including Keegan-Michael Key, saddled with a silly accent; Megan Mullally; and Andrew Rannells, the funniest actor on Girls who gets only a line or two. But then there’s Elon Musk, who should stick to gadgets rather than gags. (AH)

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THE BATTLE OF ALGIERS. Gillo Pontecorvo’s influential 1965 docudrama recounts the armed dispute in 1954 between Algerians looking to reclaim their country and the French colonial forces intent on keeping it. In Arabic and French, with subtitles. Dec. 28, Dec. 30-Jan. 1 and Jan. 3-4. Row House Cinema NORTH BY NORTHWEST. Cary Grant stars as a man wrongly accused in Alfred Hitchcock’s 1959 thriller, which features two iconic scenes: Grant running from a crop-duster, and the gravity-defying climax on the face of Mount Rushmore. Matt Buchholz, who has spent the last year watching and blogging about Hitchcock films, will introduce the film at the 7:35 p.m. Fri., Dec. 30 screening. He will discuss his year-long project and explain why this one is his fa-

THE GREAT BEAUTY. When occasional journalist and Rome society fixture Jep Gambardella (Toni Servillo) turns 65, he grows more contemplative of his life: Has it all been a whirl of parties, bullshit and frivolous pursuits? Director Paolo Sorrentino examines this query in his loosely plotted but visually dazzling film. The luxurious homes, the crumbling Roman ruins, the gorgeous ennui of the decadent elite, the bright colors, sly wit and surreal moments will remind viewers of similar Fellini films. You might find the existential troubles of Gambardella not quite universal, but if you have the patience for this sort of arty, stylized Euro dramedy, this is a fine and mostly entertaining example. In Italian, with subtitles. Jan. 6-7 and Jan. 9-11. Row House Cinema (AH)

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EVOLUTION. In Lucile Hadzihalilovic’s offbeat film, a young boy lives with his mother — and similar young boys and mothers — on an island by the sea. The lad begins to question his odd existence, including the lack of men. In French, with subtitles. 7:30 p.m. nightly, Dec. 26-29. Harris WHY HIM? Last week, movie audiences were applying the “What is your why?”line from Collateral Beauty to that misguided dramedy. This week, they’ll be asking “Why this?” at Why Him? John Hamburg’s R-rated comedy shuffles out a tired premise, re-sets it at the holidays for maximum last-reel feels and hangs it with a slew of witless gags (now with more profanity!). The bigidea laugh here is the generation/cultural gap between a middle-aged Michigan dad (Bryan Cranston) and his daughter’s boyfriend, a Silicon Valley hipster-doofus zillionaire (James Franco, doing his thing). So we get jokes about high-tech gadgets that already feel dated (that our toilet technology is decades behind Japan’s is nothing to laugh about); assorted fecklessness from another rich

AMARCORD. In Federico Fellini’s 1973 eulogy for his boyhood, the sex scenes, adolescent pranks and other earthy antics merely assure that our picture of little coastal Rimini in the 1930s is as raucous as it is lyrical. Families scream at each other — hilariously — over supper; lustful boys lie in confession; fascists march gaily, and interrogate suspected dissidents cruelly; a peacock flies through a snowstorm. The structure is episodic, the images often beautiful. In Italian, with subtitles. In Italian, with subtitles. Jan. 610 and Jan. 12. Row House Cinema (Bill O’Driscoll)

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Why Him?

REPERTORY BABE. A sweet pig dreams of herding sheep in this 1995 talking-animals classic directed by Chris Noonan. Dec. 28-Jan. 2, and Jan. 4-5. Row House Cinema CHARADE. Audrey Hepburn and Cary Grant star in Stanley Donen’s 1963 thriller about a widow and a stash of stolen cash. Also, European locales and a jazzy score by Henry Mancini. Dec. 31 and Jan. 4. Row House Cinema THE KARATE KID. A new kid (Ralph Macchio) being bullied learns self-defense — and so much more — from an elderly Japanese gardener (Pat Morita). “Wax on, wax off.” John G. Avildsen directs this 1984 teen fave. Dec. 28-30, Jan. 1-3 and Jan. 5. Row House Cinema

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