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One woman’s journey through loss to forgiveness By MARLA DOWDALL mdowdall@perfprint.ca
EMC News – From the smiling blues eyes of a baby boy, to photos of an athletic young man who had a vivacious sporting and family life, to a photograph of a man proudly embracing his children just days before Christmas. This was perhaps the last photograph taken of Bob McIntosh before the one that was taken by the medical examiner at the morgue just a week later. In telling the horri¿c story of her husband’s death, Katy Hutchison begged those listening to never forget the way he lived. In conveying her story and sharing photographs depicting her husband’s life to the large audience gathered at Notre Dame Catholic High School in Carleton Place, Nov. 16, Hutchison spoke of the power of forgiveness, and respect. She relayed the message of moving on with life in a positive fashion. Hers is a story that resulted in the forgiving of her husband’s killer, Ryan Aldridge. It was New Year’s eve, 1997, Squamish, British Columbia, Katy and her husband Bob McIntosh were sitting around with a few friends, who were in town for the holidays – taking stock of life, what had been, what the future held. Then came a knock at the
Photo by MARLA DOWDALL
Katy Hutchison speaks to students at Notre Dame Catholic High School in Carleton Place, Nov. 16 about the journey to forgiveness after her husband Bob was murdered New Year’s Eve 1997. She has come to forgive his killer and shared her story of positive synergy with students, staff and members of the public. The event was organized by the Lanark County Community Justice Program. door around 10:30 p.m. It was another couple, saying a young man Jamie, down the block was having a party at his parent’s home. They were away on holiday. Bob called the house twice, each time seeking out Jamie, neither time having any success. Bob and his fellow male friend left to go check and make sure everything was
okay down the road. “He never came home,� Katy said. Two hundred youth were inside the house. Jamie had “taken off.� Bob headed upstairs to ensure there were no kids in the bedrooms. There he encountered a young man. Exchanging words with the youth, Bob was then punched in the face. He fell to the
ground. At this point Aldridge made his way over to Bob. In what Aldridge later described as “four soccer type kicks� to Bob’s head, the fatal blows were struck, severing an artery in the back of his head. Bob died of a brain hemorrhage. “I barely remember the police coming to my door,� she recalled.
In the hospital, standing in the emergency room watching ER staff tend to her husband – she thought, “they get to go home when they are done, but my shift, it was never going to end. I was going to have to Âżnd a way to live with what happened.â€? “People asked me how I could forgive. How could I not? My kids lost their dad, I
didn’t want them to lose me too,â€? she said. “They only had one parent and I wanted to be a good parent.â€? Opening her heart, she let herself forgive. But it wasn’t a quick journey to forgiveness. Returning home at 4 a.m., Jan. 1, 1998, she tried to Âżgure out how to tell her children the horrible news. Her twin boy and girl, Emma and Sam, were just two weeks shy of their Âżfth birthday and it was only days after Christmas. They should have been doing what kids do best, playing with their new toys, she said. Her young boy Sam’s response was to ask for Cheerios. In opening her presentation, Hutchison described Bob as someone who loved to ski, loved cars, and who took up marathon running. He went to law school and this was where the two met. They ended up married and living in a rented apartment in Vancouver. They soon moved to a little town nearby, Squamish, eventually getting two dogs as a bit of a test before deciding they wanted children. Emma and Sam, their twins, were born a short time later. In 1997, Bob was turning 40 and was taking part in the world triathlon championships in Australia. See JUSTICE page 7
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