10.x.58
early letters
[el. 113]
now it is probable that I shall be born as that’. It is always better to bear up when misfortune assails us, but there is nothing else we can do: we inherit our past deeds. [ EL. 113 ]
10 October 1958
Dear Mr. Perera,1 I have just received your letter of the 8th. The shortest answer to your question why I think solitude is essential for mettå and why other people are a positive hindrance is simply this. The Buddha has said that noise is a thorn to first jhåna; mettå practice is first and foremost to obtain jhåna; and other people are noisy. But this needs some expansion and qualification. It may be said, perhaps, that mettå is recommended by the Buddha for getting rid of anger, and that anger normally arises in our dealings with other people; and that it is therefore in our dealings with other people that mettå is best practised. It is most certainly true that we have need of mettå in our dealings with other people, and the Ven. Thera’s advice to you is excellent and there is nothing to be said against it. But the trouble is this: before we can be in a position to have mettå in our dealings with other people we have to first know what mettå is, and secondly to have it at our command. Now, just as it is possible to practise ånåpånasati in the presence of other people when one has already become skilled in it by oneself, so it is possible to practise mettå in the presence of others only when one has practised it a great deal when alone. And just as the worst conditions for practising ånåpånasati are the noise and bustle of other people, so it is with mettå. Until you are able to practise either ånåpånasati or mettå in solitude you will never succeed in company—the obstacles are far too great. For example, suppose there is someone you dislike, and in whose presence you become angry: unless you are already able to prevent anger from arising when you think of him in his absence (which needs much practice), you will have no chance at all of getting rid of the anger that arises when you actually meet him. Once anger takes possession of you there is very little you can do except to stop it from finding expression in words or deeds, and to allow it to subside; it is far too late to start practising mettå. But if you thouroughly practise mettå before you meet such a person, then it is possible that anger will not arise when you do meet him. Having mettå in your dealings with other people consists in having mettå before you deal with them, that is, in solitude—once you start dealing with them you will have little opportunity of attending to mettå (or if you do attend to mettå
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