34.06

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The Milton Paper OCTOBER 21, 2016

VOL. 34, NO. 06

MILTON’S INDEPENDENT WEEKLY STUDENT NEWSPAPER

New Printers Save Money: But At What Cost?

Write in Candidates By JACK SLOANE & JIMMY DeLANO The current election cycle features two candidates with the highest unfavorability ratings in history. Amidst all the chaos, many concerned voters have begun to ask themselves: what should I do? Instead of wanting to vote for either Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton, many voters have started to align in protest against both candidates. Immediate responses include voting for third party candidates like Jill Stein of the Green Party or Gary Johnson of the Libertarian Party. Nevertheless, neither third party candidate has gained significant traction on a national basis. Johnson’s minor rise in polls immediately ceased after he did not know how to respond to MSNBC’s Mark Basic’s question, “What would you do, if you were elected, about Aleppo?” Meanwhile, Stein can’t get above a mere 3%. In this difficult election, the only option for a voter interested in none of the available candidates is to write-in a name. CNN reports that Google searches for “write-in” have surged 2,800% in the past weeks. After Trump’s recent slew of sexually aggressive comments, many Republicans rescinded their support and turned to a write-in option. High profile Republicans, like Sen. Kelly Ayotte (NH), announced that they will be writing-in Mike Pence (Trump’s vice presidential running mate). CNN also reported that Google searches for “write-in Mike Pence” have spiked 2,400% in the last week. Similarly, phrases to the likes of “Is Bernie Sanders a writein candidate” have surged nearly 3,000% . CNN also commented that in the past election cycle of 2012, write-in’s accounted for .11% of the overall vote--the most in any presidential election. For those that don’t know, there remains a space on the ballot where a voter can write down the name of a candidate for president. However, only seven US states allow write-in’s with no qualification;

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COURTESY OF MALCOLM

By MARSHALL SLOANE

advertises that the program can save 70-80% of office waste and can roduce overall paper Few understand or appreciate the new volume by 30-40%. The single administraprinting system, yet the mixed reactions from tive console also allows for a streamlined students, faculty, and staff has not stopped system that improves convenience for an members of Academic Technology Services institution with as complicated technological (ATS) from rolling out the largely unpopular needs as Milton Academy. printer changes. “A number of schools in secondary and Milton Academy does not own any of the higher education use Papercut,” said Mr. printers on campus; instead, ATS and the Price. “This software would allow us to gain administration sign rental agreements with metrics on printer use, enabling chargebacks an office supplier. The most recent five year for printing. The chargeback is a feature that lease of Canon printers expired over the the software offers but it is not at all a reason summer. why we bought it. For instance, if we wanted With Milton’s requiring a new printer to charge back the english department for the contract, ATS completed an analysis of Mil- number of pages they print, we could.” ton’s needs and sent 12 vendors requests for The benefits associated by the new softproposals. According to Mr. Price, the Chief ware have often been outweighed by inTechnology Officer, ATS decided to replace conveniences and complications. Papercut all Canon printers requires all students with Xerox machines to use their IA cards Milton Academy that have comparable to log onto their accapabilities. Nearly count on the printdoes not own any all printers were reers, which reduces placed with these 34 paper waste but of the printers on new Xerox machines frustrates many stufrom Conway Office dents. Without the campus Solutions. The new IA, a student cannot contract with Conway Office Solutions cost print from the machines. Day students did less than the previous Canon contract despite not previously need their IA cards all day, the new printers, maintenance plan, and Pa- so the new IA requirement for printers (in percut MF software. addition to the recently implemented IA-lock ATS selected Papercut after 12 - 18 on the doors of Ware) represents a shift in months of searching for a print manage- routine that has been widely perceived as an ment software. This new system allows for unnecessary hindrance. badge printing capabilities and the new StuMany students and faculty also fear that dent-Print-Anywhere option. Papercut MF

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Inside This Issue NARRATIVES page 4

DAKOTA PIPELINE page 5

FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS page 14

CROSSWORD page 17


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The Milton Paper The 34th Editorial Board Editors-in-Chief Managing Editor Editor at Large Opinion Manager News Managers Senior Editors

Malcolm McCann and Eli Burnes Letitia Chan Cheyenne Porcher Mateen Tabatabaei Marshall Sloane and Henry Westerman

Chloe Kim and Henry Burnes

A&E Editor Rachel Handler Opinion Editor Gabrielle Fernandopulle

Layout Editor Jack Daley Photo Editor Caroline Massey

Faculty Sponsor Lisa Baker

Cartoonist Lilly Le

Sports Editor Peter Digiovanni Associate Editors Navpreet Sekhon Jonah Garnick Nihal Raman Website Manager Alex Iansiti

News

Opinion

Abby Walker Alexandra Millard Allison Reed Elina Thadhani Ellie Lachenauer Evita Thadhani Lyndsey Mugford Jack Sloane Juliana Viola Sarah Alkhafaji Will Torous Jimmy Delano A&E

Barbara McDuffee Celena Eccleston Elaine Wu Jerome Vainisi Molly Wilson Natasha Roy Noah Cheng Rachel Ding Serena Fernandopulle Vivian Soong Willa DuBois William Kim Jack Weiler Pierce Wilson Jessica Wang Pierce Wilson Jessica Kim Columnists

Aditya Gandhi Emma Comrie Emma James Liz Foster Zoe Camaya Olivia Zhong Pierce Wilson Madison Lynch Sports Chris Mathews Liam Kennedy Sarah Willwerth Sophia Li Theo Miailhe

Michelle Erdenesanaa Tyler Piazza Semi Oloko Coalter Palmer Humor Sophia Wilson-Pelton Lydia Hill Zack Herman Nick Govindan

Milton’s Independent Weekly Student Newspaper “A Forum for Discussion and Thought” Founded 1979 • Publishing Weekly Since 1983 Founders David Roth • Mark Denneen The Milton Paper is an independent, student-produced publication. It does not necessarily represent the views of the students, faculty, administration, or Milton Academy itself. Please do not copy or reproduce without permission. Letters Policy: The Milton Paper gladly accepts letters from anyone who sends them. We do not promise to publish any or all letters, and we retain the rights to edit letters for content, length, and clarity. We will not publish anonymous letters. If inclined, please take the opportunity to write to us. Send letters by mail (Letters to the Editor, The Milton Paper, Milton Academy, 170 Centre Street, Milton, MA 02186), by email (TheMiltonPaper34@gmail.com), or by personal delivery to our mailbox in the faculty lounge.

Editorial Expand the Alumni Network Throughout Milton’s long history, thousands of students have walked these hallowed halls. Some of these students have become world renowned authors. Others have led Fortune 500 companies and political bodies. Most Milton graduates will contribute to the world in one way or another, yet Milton students are unable to appreciate or benefit from this vast pool of distinguished alumni. As it currently stands, Milton does, in fact, keep close tabs on its alumni, by organizing reunions for the graduating classes, bringing alumni back as speakers, drawing upon alumni support for fundraising, and utilizing alumni to help facilitate senior projects. Furthermore, the annual Milton Magazine showcases several Milton graduates who have become pioneers in their respective fields and helps connect all members of the Milton community. Yet, Milton’s current alumni network does not facilitate interpersonal relationships with students and graduates. There are obvious reasons why alumni-student networks thrive in the nation’s higher education institutions. Stated plainly, such a system works well to directly benefit all parties involved: students enjoy the benefits of familial connections simply by joining their school’s ecosystem, alumni who are proud of their alma maters and eager to give back can do so outside of monetary donations, and schools benefit by the pride and community created by the connection between alumni and current student. By and large, the demand for universities to have alumni-student networks is apparent at Milton. Often, Milton students are interested in academic subjects, yet lost on careers. How is a student interested in English supposed to know how to follow her passions? The clear answer is to look to the people who were once in the same predicament. As summer approaches, Milton students search far and wide for internships and job offers. In a world where ‘real world experience’ is a prerequisite for future careers, internships are becoming more and more valuable. Milton alumni should be encouraged by the Communications Office to advertise internships and job offers to Milton students. A strong alumni-student network would give students guidance for the future: both intellectually and experientially. Furthermore, a strong alumni-network is self rewarding, and students helped by past graduates will be motivated to themselves to help the next generation of Milton students. Critics of this proposition may point out that it is conceivable that adult, full-time workers are less than keen to be contacted by eager but inexperienced high school students regarding mentorship or summer jobs. Small scale, already existing alumni networks at Milton, however, give convincing evidence to the contrary: both the Programming Department and the Investment Club have drawn upon the expertise and achievements of past students to provide valuable experiences and resources for current students. Investment Club has hosted hedge fund managers and other Milton graduates thriving in the finance world at their meetings. Similarly, the Programming Department helps students get in contact with alumni situated in attractive programming jobs at firms like Google and Uber in order for the students to tap into these experts’ technical wisdom (and, in some cases, even to acquire internships). Alumni in both networks have shown themselves to be willing and eager to be contacted by Milton students and share advice and experience with them. Investment Club and the Programming Department have already shown that the alumni network model present in almost every college and university is one which can be applied to the Milton Academy Upper School while conferring profound benefits to all parties involved. The advent of an alumni network would help students, involve alumni, and ultimately enrich our strong connection as a community. •


News Parents’ Weekend 2016 By EVITA THADANI

mixed feelings about this annual event. Although around 50% of the students Every year, hundreds of parents crowd stated that they didn’t really care about onto the Milton campus to experience Parents’ Day at all (they didn’t think it what their child’s typical school day feels was necessarily a good thing or a bad like. Parents attend their children’s class- thing), many responses to the survey ares, meet with their teachers, and watch ticulated both benefits and disadvantages their sports games. However, in the per- for students during this day. The biggest spective of many students, Parents Day benefit, in the opinion of many students, in the past has been anything but normal. is the no homework long weekend that Due to many events offered during the follows. Another benefit many students day, parents’ day will be quite different mentioned was how classes are usually than a normal school day, just as it has easier, there aren’t tests, and, apparently, been in the past. the flik food is miraculously better. AlBecause of the huge influx of parents, though classes are generally more trivial, Friday class assemblies won’t be in their many students are also glad that parents regular locations. Instead, seniors will be finally begin to understand the difficulty in the Stu, juniors in Wigg, sophomores in of school. Despite the reduced workload, Kellner and freshmen in the RSG. After- when asked to describe Parents’ Day in wards, from 8:20-2:55, parents will have one word, the highest repeated answer the opportunity to visit their child’s class- was the word “stressful”. Based on the es. From 10:00-10:30 refreshments will short answer questions, it appears that the be provided, and starting at 11:15, parents normal stress of classes is replaced, by can enjoy a Flik lunch in the ACC. Also, some, with parent related anxiety. parents can attend an afternoon reception Two other popular words used to at the RSG for wine and snacks at the end describe Parents’ Day were “crowded” of the day. and “fun.” Parents’ Parent’s Weekend Day does have a spans from Friday to reputation for being When asked Saturday, and throughextremely chaotic, out the weekend stuloud, and crowdto describe dents will offer several ed. Students who different presentations, have experienced Parents’ Day sports games, and perParents’ Day before formances. Just a few recommend that in one word, presentations include students don’t lose the Saturday confertheir parents, which the highest ences about study is surprisingly very repeated abroad programs, the hard. One student college process, senior said, “Even if your answer was projects and communiparents have done ty engagement. There Parents’ Day before, the word is also a Jazz concert at stay with them, 10:30, a “chowder and because they don’t “stressful” chili” reception, and a know your schedule total of twelve sports or the campus as games on Saturday well as you do. But where parents and families can cheer for at the same time, if you lose them, don’t the Milton teams. Also, most teachers waste the time between classes looking will have sign-up sheets for fifteen minute for them, you still need to get to classes meetings on Friday or Saturday, in which on time.” The same student also advises parents can ask any questions they might parents to “meet your child’s friends and have. Although Friday and Saturday may their parents, especially if the friends are be two very busy and tiring days, most boarders because because you may not be parents look forward to them because able to meet the parents until next year.” they see it as an opportunity to learn more Many students had similar answers in about their children’s lives and about the the survey that reflected common trends school they attend everyday. and themes. A recurring comment adParents’ Day might be dedicated to vised students to make sure they do their parents, but a survey of one hundred high CONTINUED ON PAGE 4 schoolers revealed that students have

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Write in Candidates CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 whereas, another 34 states allow write-in’s for candidates who have submitted the proper paperwork, according to the Russia Times. The last nine states prohibit this act altogether. It remains highly unlikely that the greater American electorate could somehow organize to vote for one desired candidate using the write-in process. And, more importantly, the write-in’s are not considered unless one of the four candidates -- already on the ballot -- is unable to reach 270 electoral votes. Despite its impossible nature, Americans sure seem curious about this up and coming voting trend. However, one question still remains: how does committing your vote to a write-in candidate impact the election? With unprecedented polarity, little historical information can inform us on how a surge in write-in candidates will affect the overall election. However, it is clear that writing in another candidate from one of the two traditional parties is essentially a vote for the other. Consider Senator Kelly Ayotte, a Republican who has pledged to write-in Mike Pence for president. A write-in candidate has never stood a chance on a national election scale. Thus, Ayotte’s vote instead becomes one for not Trump. A vote for not Trump is essentially a vote for Hillary Clinton. This logic applies to the Democratic side as well. Fervent Bernie Sanders supporters have promised to write-in their left-wing presidential hopeful. A Democratic voter taking a vote away from Hillary Clinton essentially votes for Donald Trump. Although the weight of one vote may seem irrelevant, acknowledge the presidential election of 2000, when George Bush defeated Al Gore in one of the closest races of all time. In the battleground state of Florida, with many electoral votes up for grabs, Bush secured victory by a total of only 537 votes. According to the US Election Atlas, 0.01% of all Floridian voters in that election cast a write-in candidate. That narrow percentage is the same margin of victory by which George Bush became president. Clearly, the write-in names had no chance of winning, yet those individuals wasted a very critical and powerful vote. As stated by Democracy Chronicles, “the power of write-in votes is about as strong as an ant battling an elephant in a grassy field.” Although write-in candidates have influenced the entire outcome of elections, ultimately, this election will boil down to a choice between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump. A write-in vote by a member of one party will in fact benefit the opposing party rather than serve as a protest. Bloomberg reports that, “write-in votes serve an important purpose if a shock late in the election occurs -- like the death or indictment of a candidate, when parties will scramble to field someone else.” With Trump’s sexual assault allegations and potential for a shake-up, a writein candidate could surge to presidency if either candidate drops out. •


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News Narratives: Mr. Parisi

By HENRY WESTERMAN This is the second installment of the Narratives, a series in which we collect personal stories via interview with members of the Milton community, transcribe them, and publish them in the speaker’s own voice. If you, a student or faculty member, would like to tell a story to be published in this column, please email Henry Westerman (I) at henry_westerman17@milton.edu. Mr. Parisi is the chair of the Performing Arts department and has been working at Milton since 1995; He has worked in both the Performing Arts department and the Admissions Office, and also teaches the Improv and Narrative Journalism/Performance classes. He is a dorm faculty member and advisor in Norris House, and the sponsor of the 1212 program. People always ask “do you have any regrets”, and often the immediate response is “no I don’t have any regrets. And I don’t have regrets, for the most part, except this one that leaps to mind for me. There was this teacher at Milton, Nina Seidenman (her name is on the wall of veteran teachers in Wigg). She was awesome! She taught French, and directed the first 1212 plays, which originally were play readings in room 1212 in Warren Hall. And, while she was at Milton, that place was magical: the room was this old, amphitheatre-like classroom with no chairs, no desks, next to the room where Ethics and Art history were taught, on the same hallway with all of the art classes, across the hall from Mrs. Jacobs’ Geometry, down the hall from the Development Office, upstairs from admissions… it was this fantastic crossroads of what I came to know as Milton, which was all these people from different parts of the school, mixed in together and getting to know and care about each other. Nina took these play readings—they would meet once a week, they would have a script in hand—and she made them into these wonderful performances, where the production values were such that you didn’t care about all the costume and set and lights; we barely even had lights. We would just pack people into this room, and the door that you came in and out of was in the middle of the acting space, so

COURTESY OF THE INTERNET

when the show was about to start, you’d shut the door, and lock it (laughs) and we were all locked in that room, and nobody could get out! But nobody wanted to get out, because the shows were so amazing, and the energy, the vibe in that room, was so amazing. Nina was magnificent. She always had all these things to say, few of them appropriate for this project (laughs), much of it around going for the truth, and taking risks in terms of directing, making choices that feel organic to the actors because that then will feel natural to the audience. She was a huge inspiration and a mentor for me from the moment I stepped foot on campus. Anyway, going back to my regret. Nina had cancer, off and on, for years, but she always bounced back! And when she came back she was always better, and stronger, and better looking than ever, rocking some new wig and some designer outfit. I remember thinking, during her last bout of cancer, that “I need to go see her”. And, for whatever reason, I didn’t… and then she died. (long pause) And I can’t believe I just didn’t follow my instinct, and go and visit my friend. I still keep a paper calendar, like a day planner, and I still have the date and time of her death in my day planner, because I don’t want to forget. I don’t. I will not forget this person who, in big and small ways, was so influential to me. •

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Parents’ Weekend CONTINUED FROM PAGE 3 homework and are as prepared for class as possible. Also, numerous students admitted that they like dragging their parents to the fifth floor of Ware so that they can feel what they go through everyday. Well, whether you like it or not, Parents’ Day is inevitable. It will be a day for reuniting, socializing, and learning. Although there is a schedule for parents and students, we’ll just have to wait to see what really happens this Friday! •

HAPPY PARENTS DAY!

Printers CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 the new system also slows down printing. “I was so troubled by the slow printer rate and the glitchiness of the authentication, that I actually brought in my own color printer which I store on campus,” said Alex Iansiti (I). “In retrospect, it was probably not the best decision to roll out this new software simultaneously with new machines at the start of school. I think it was too much at the same time. It put a new emphasis on the need for ID cards immediately,” explained Mr. Price. “We are dealing with latency in the cloud print protocol. We knew that this was a change but if it is proven that it is a slower experience...then we need to make changes.” Many still believe that the bolstered security and improved paper conservation can outweigh the negative impacts. Mr. Price explained, “we hope that the combination of people getting used to the new process and improvements that we make will cause a better experience for people.” •


Green Out

Crude Industry: The Dakota Access Pipeline By MICHELLE ERDENESANAA Not long ago, the Cannonball and Missouri Rivers ran through quiet land at the heart of sacred territory. Today, crowds gather daily at the confluence of the two waterways to fight the construction of the Dakota Access Pipeline. The pipeline, a $3.8 billion, 1,172-mile conduit, would carry crude oil fracked in North Dakota to a storage facility in Illinois. Supporters of the pipeline argue that construction of this new infrastructure will limit U.S. dependence on foreign oil, cut down energy costs, and create jobs. However bright those upsides sound, the consequences of the pipeline far outweigh potential benefits. Note that all of these possible advantages center around industrial growth and economic value, while consequences of construction center around moral pitfalls and environmental hazards. Constructing the Dakota Access Pipeline would both jeopardize the Dakotas’ environmental health and infringe on native people’s rights. Along with native tribes, environmental activists oppose the pipeline– for good reason. The crude oil carried through the pipes is obtained by fracking, the same method used to extract natural gas. Such practices are notorious for leaking egregious amounts of methane into the atmosphere. The destructive nature of hydraulic fracturing also risks increasing seismic activity, leading to more frequent, stronger earthquakes in fracking areas. But obtaining the oil isn’t the only dangerous step in crude oil production. While supporters of the project insist that pipeline transport of oil is more safe than carrying it on freight trains, the risk of leaks is still high. Since the 1980s, there have been nearly 8000 reported U.S. pipeline oil leaks, an average of 300 leaks per year. Safety assessments of the Keystone XL pipeline estimated that the highly-disputed extension of the Keystone Pipeline would produce about ninety major spills (each releasing at least fifty barrels’ worth of oil) in the expansion’s lifetime.

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Opinion

These numbers indicate an unreliable, dangerous system; leaked oil contaminates both natural habitats and natural resources. While many show concern over the photos of pelicans covered in oil from the Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill, few people seem preoccupied with the risks of oil leaks from the Dakota Access Pipeline. Creating such a large system would also motivate more crude oil extraction, increasing the amount of fossil fuels burned in the United States. To combat global warming, the U.S. must avoid any and all reasons to combust more hydrocarbons. However, environmental risks represent only one of this project’s many moral violations. Many people protesting in the Dakotas belong to the Standing Rock Sioux tribe. The tribe is suing the federal government for violating tribal treaty regulations by planning construction of the pipeline without consulting native people. The pipeline would run close to native land, likely desecrating sacred territory and burial sites. If the conduit were to leak, the oil would pollute the Missouri River, the Sioux tribe’s water source. This project is yet another instance of the federal government’s disrespecting the rights and livelihood of Native Americans. By continuing plans for construction, the United States indicates that the voices of native people still do not matter. Such projects are a major step back for the U.S, and they undermine any positive relationship it has built with native people, whose voices deserve to be heard first. To truly represent the needs and rights of all of its citizens, the federal government must weigh the morality of such projects over any potential economic benefits. Some may wonder why indigenous people’s rights are relevant to a specifically environmental column. Lack of native people’s representation and environmental destruction often go hand-in-hand. Some of the most problematic industrial development, like

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COURTESY OF THE WORLD WIDE WEB

Technology Trap By WILL KIM Technology is prevalent within every student’s daily routine. Electronics have improved worker productivity; in the classroom, Smart Boards bestow upon us the power to draw on websites and present coma-inducing PowerPoints with ease. Gadgets of the 21st century, however, dominate our lives in unhelpful ways, too. We pull out Snapchat everywhere. In class, the ability to flip between social media and work in every few seconds cuts through our attention spans. The allure of the glowing screens we own deprives us of growth. The usage of pen and paper prevents the many pitfalls that keyboards have. A writing issue that most struggle with is “compulsive editing disorder”. How many times have we typed out a sentence, only to instantly go back and fiddle with word choice and sentence structure? We prematurely micro-edit before we have written enough for editing to be productive. Being barred from instantly going back and rewriting sentences allows us to get our creative juices flowing before shutting the faucet with a visit to thesaurus.com. Plus, the time for thought that we get from writing by hand lets us carefully consider the words we put down before we spew all of them out. Another trap that technology lays down is “mindless processing.” The phenomenon is widely observed in our beloved English workshop sessions. At first, we took notes in our designated notebooks. We acquainted ourselves with the rigors of carpal tunnel syndrome as we furiously wrote down the concepts that were projected before us. Having to make the split-second distinction between what is worth writing and what isn’t is exhausting, and keeps us on our toes. To be able to make this judgment, we have to understand everything that is laid before us, so we can write down the really important ones. Soon, many resigned themselves to the computer—the increased typing speed allowed them to abandon this decision-making process altogether: why sift through the information, when one can type it all up, verbatim? Many typists held their faith in the idea that they would read through their pages of unedited writing later, learning the information later on. Pam Mueller of Princeton and Daniel Oppenheimer of UCLA decided to tackle ‘keyboard vs. paper’ in a study they conducted in 2014. They assembled a group of college students with various note taking preferences and sent them to different

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Opinion

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Clinton’s Unfair Standard

Presidential Debates Will Change the American Youth By JACK WEILER

Trump hasn’t faced the same level of criticism for his false claims. Indeed, Clinton has switched her stance on some controversial issues. For example, in 2003, she was against gay marriage only to change her position in 2013, but again, this isn’t anything new for a politician. Her stances as a politician have evolved over time to accommodate her own changing personal opinions and the world’s development. Once again, Clinton is being held at a standard that doesn’t apply to her male politician counterparts. Many Clinton protesters scream “#HillaryforPrison” at her rallies, but the FBI has conducted a thorough investigation of her emails and cleared her of all charges. James Comey, the FBI director reported that though her actions were “extremely careless,” there wasn’t enough evidence for the Justice Department to prosecute Clinton for wrongdoing. I do agree that Clinton’s carelessness with her emails raises concerns as to how responsibly she would treat official documents. The FBI, however, concluded Clinton didn’t have any malicious intent when handling the emails, leading me to question whether the extreme condemnation Clinton has received is appropriate. I would much prefer a careless president over one who has little to no political qualifications. Throughout the campaigns, the general public has frequently brought up Bill Clinton’s sexual assault scandals. Of course, sexual assault can’t simply be brushed aside. But, the accusations of sexual assault against Bill Clinton’s should not be addressed in conjunction with Hillary’s presidential campaign. Hillary’s capabilities as a president and her ability to run a country shouldn’t be and aren’t defined by her husband’s actions. Trump himself has been accused of sexual assault, accusations which should have vastly more import on the presidential election than those against Bill. For male presidential candidates, their spouses are rarely mentioned during debates, and when they are, they have never been criticized to the level that Bill has been. Why is Hillary criticized

The two Presidential Debates completed thus far leave no shortage of talking points for the media and average Americans. To recap, the first debate headlined Mr. Trump’s questioning Mrs. Clinton’s “stamina,” and Mrs. Clinton’s questioning Mr. Trump’s treatment of women. The second debate, a town-hall event, consisted, in the first half, of attacks on Mr. Trump’s “locker-room talk” scandal and, in the latter half, found a more hopeful tone due to the the national-television premier of Ken Bone. The common place between these two debates lies in the candidates’ engaging in elementary-school discussion. Aside from the traditional political antics in the debate – avoiding questions, pre-prepared answers, etc. – behavior beyond the scope of “antics” resonated throughout both nights on both sides of the stage. Mr. Trump and Mrs. Clinton spat lies, interrupted one another, and insulted each other time after time. First, how much did Mr. Trump and Mrs. Clinton really lie? Numerous websites boast “fact-checkers,” so to speak, for each candidate’s policies and exclamations in the debates; however, finding a website that truly relays neutrality and is fair to both candidates remains a problem for people attempting to look at empirical evidence. While no source is completely unbiased when fact-checking the debates, “politifact.com” seems to relay a fairly unbiased fact-checking (it has been praised and criticized by all parties – it has no consensus of direction of bias). PolitiFact tallied thirty-three times Mr. Trump and Mrs. Clinton lied to some degree in the first debate. Although, the tally is most likely an underestimate since seemingly trivial but also false things must have also been said that PolitiFact wasn’t able to pick up. There were only twenty-five questions asked in the first debate – per Quartz (qz.com). Collectively, the two candidates lied more times than the number of questions asked. On top of the rampant lying, the candidates, Mr. Trump to a larger degree, had trouble letting each other finish a simple collection of sentences. The concept of “take your turn” was not highlighted in either of the debates. The most disturbing problem with the debates, however, glares like headlights: The candidates contained zero respect for each other. Even the last

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COURTESY OF MALCOLM

By JESSICA KIM Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are two of the most hated candidates in American history. The 2016 election is different from all others in that voters from both parties have not only heavily criticized the other party’s candidate, but also heavily criticized their own. To many Democrats, Donald Trump is a misogynistic and xenophobic bully, and to Republicans, Trump does not represent their party’s values. Similarly, to many Republicans, Clinton is a radical leftist, and to many Democrats, she is a liar who can’t be trusted in office. As someone who has almost always supported the Democratic candidate, I was surprised by the amount of hate directed towards Clinton from liberals. With an impressive eight years as first lady, eight years in the Senate, and four years as secretary of state, Clinton is one of the most qualified candidates in American history. Yet, despite her experience, Fivethirtyeight reports Clinton has the lowest “strong favorability” rating of all past major party nominees. Meaning that although Clinton has a current four-point lead in the polls, according to ABC news, few of her voters are actively supporting her. They are instead reluctant voters driven only to keep Trump out of the White House. Although there are completely legitimate reasons for why one might not support Clinton, we must consider why the extreme anti-Clinton rhetoric has become so popularized and accepted by the general populace. I would argue that, whether intentionally or unintentionally, many voters have been holding Clinton to a different standard than they have previously of male candidate. The main argument against Clinton is that she is dishonest. As a politician, it is only expected that Clinton modifies or stretches the truth in order to get her point across or even to keep up her image. Compared to Donald Trump’s whopping 60.13% of claims rated “false” or “pants on fire” by Politifact since his candidacy announcement, Clinton has only 13.33%. Conversely, Clinton has gained the reputation of being “crooked” whereas


Crude Industry CONTINUED FROM PAGE 5 damming the Elwha River or building resorts in Jumbo Valley, infringe on the well-being of both native people and the environment. Many tribes are based in rural areas, close to the effects of ecologically harmful practices like damming rivers or exploiting fragile habitats. When wasteful industry encroaches on tribal rights or natural environments, the wrongdoers fail to recognize what was there first. Native people and wilderness are both exploited despite the fact that they existed in their land before any of the exploiters did. For this reason, indigenous rights have everything to do with environmental issues; when one is disregarded, the other likely is, too. Developing the Dakota Access Pipeline is a deplorable pursuit of wealth and dirty energy, as well as a blatant exploitation of our native people. The pipeline is not the energy solution we need. It’s one that neither our Earth nor our integrity can afford. •

Tech Trap CONTINUED FROM PAGE 5 classrooms, some of which provided notebooks, and some of which provided laptop computers. They all listened to the same lecture, and were instructed to use their usual note-taking strategy. Half an hour after the lecture, the students were tested on the information in two ways: factual recall (How many years ago did the Indus civilization exist?) and conceptual learning (How do Japan and Sweden differ in their approaches to social equality?). The results showed that “both groups memorized about the same number of facts from the lectures, but the laptop users did much worse when tested on ideas.” The experiment was repeated with another group of students, this time with the test set a week after the lectures. Again, those using paper fared much better, this time even on the facts. Of course, none of this means that paper is universally better. Many people find that the lightning-fast features of modern technology make them a better learner. I myself find Quizlet to be a great tool for memorizing terms. Electronics are efficient, but they also leave instant gratification (YouTube, Netflix, 9gag, Tumblr, Buzzfeed, etc.) a click away, allowing phones to destroy procrastinators. We need to be able to reasonably distance ourselves from such dangers and, like anything else, find moderation in our usage of them. When studying, my books are always filled with tags, highlights, underlines, comments, eraser dust, and creases: the aftermath of a true learning session. Technology will always improve our lives as we go on, but there will never be anything as good as a filthy, used textbook. •

Opinion

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Conservative Corner

The Ferguson Effect By JEROME VANISI The Chicago police department released a video this past Friday of a man savagely beating a policewoman in the street after she responded to a car crash nearby. Many policemen call this assault, and the officer’s response (or lack thereof), a result of the “Ferguson Effect.” The “Ferguson Effect” attributes drastically rising violent crime rates in major cities like Chicago and St. Louis to increased scrutiny and criticism of the police after a major, nationally sensationalized shooting. Despite being scorned by both Eric Holder and President Obama as having only “anecdotal” evidence, the theory is demonstrated by the clear spikes in violent crime that have followed police shootings like those of Laquan McDonald in Chicago and Michael Brown in St. Louis. The “Ferguson Effect” describes how when policemen step back for fear of facing allegations of racism and prejudice, criminals step forward to take advantage. The name “Ferguson Effect” references a 2014 police shooting in Ferguson, Missouri. Although the officer in question was cleared of any wrongdoing by both a grand jury and the U.S. Justice Department, riots ensued- Ferguson policemen were shot and the St. Louis Police Department faced intense scrutiny. Crime rates in St. Louis undoubtedly increased, but whether or not the increases were due to lack of police intervention was hotly debated at the time. Many criminologists were quick to say that there was no real trend in the increases, only anecdotal evidence. However, University of Missouri criminologist Richard Rosenfeld told the Guardian last May that after examining 54 cities and their crime trends, he could conclude that “[increases in murders] aren’t flukes or blips, this is a real increase.” He went on to say that there could be only one explanation: the Ferguson Effect, alive and in action. While President Obama told America there was “no support” for the Ferguson Effect, FBI Director James Comey vocally disagreed. “There’s a perception that police are less likely to do the marginal additional policing that suppresses crime — the getting out of your car at 2 in the morning and saying to a group of guys, ‘Hey, what are you doing here?’,” he told reporters in May. Despite being unable to provide statistical proof, Comey claims the idea was sparked by a private briefing he’d received about rising murder rates in more than 40 U.S. cities. He brought up Chicago as the main example of these spikes, blaming viral, graphic videos

of police brutality for a 54% increase in murders and a 70% increase in shootings as of April. In November 2015, during an Obama administration meeting, Chuck Rosenberg, acting chief of the DEA, told reporters he thinks there’s “something to [the Ferguson Effect].” Rosenberg sensed “more trepidation” among officers, citing that familiar fear of ending up as a viral video despite acting in accordance with the law. “You can do everything right,” he told reporters, “and still end up on the nightly news.” The policewoman (whose name has not yet been released) subjected to said beating was responding to reports of a car crash on Chicago’s West Side. 28-year-old Parta Huff had driven his car through the front of a liquor store, and found himself quickly confronted by the officer and her partner. After repeatedly ignoring the officer’s commands to stop, Huff grabbed the police woman by her neck and slammed her face against the pavement. The officer begged for backup into her radio and let out a bloodcurdling scream as her partner repeatedly tasered Huff to no avail. In a video released on Friday by the Chicago Police Department, Huff continues striking the woman while one officer tries to drag him off of her and the woman’s partner keeps his taser pressed against Huff’s neck. The police officers employed both tasers and pepper spray against Huff, but never drew their guns. The woman’s face is visible for a moment -- cheeks swollen beyond recognition, blood flowing freely from her split lips. She can be heard describing Huff “banging my head on the ground. And pounding my face… ripping my hair.” A nearby firefighter laments about how “a couple of months ago, [she] could have shot him.” Huff, of Maywood, is currently being held without bail on charges of aggravated assault and attempted murder of a police officer. Huff later tested positive for PCP, and court records show that he was already out on bail for brutally assaulting a police officer who’d stopped him for running a stop sign in April. The 43-year old, 17-year-veteran of the police force didn’t draw her gun, and paid dearly for it. “She looked at me,” Police Superintendent Eddie Johnson said in a conference of policemen. “And said she thought she was going to die. And she knew,” he pauses, “that she should shoot this guy. But she

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Opinion TRIGGERED

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By ELINA THEDANI We live in a society fixated on protecting the younger generation, especially students, from “triggering” events. Recently, schools have implemented trigger warnings, public statements indicating the emotional sensitivity of topics, and safe spaces, designated rooms for stress relief when debates or lectures are too distressing. However, with these protective constructs, the educational system has created a bubble that has grown to shield students from uncomfortable conversations and important intellectual discussions. I completely understand the validity and conceptual reasoning behind trigger warnings given before controversial talks or graphic pieces of literature. Many students in both college and high-school settings have endured countless unpredictable and terrible traumas; creating a supportive environment in which students can learn is necessary for a successful and positive experience with education. However, trigger warnings and safe spaces in their abundance have evolved into an outlet for students to avoid discussions or lectures that create even slight discomfort. Naturally, we have a tendency to evade situations that distress us, and safe spaces allow students to remove themselves from uncomfortable yet important discussions. There exists an inevitable trade-off between creating a safe environment for students and promoting controversial discussion from different perspectives. These important, globally relevant conversations about racism, rape culture, anti-semitism and more are often censored or left undeveloped for fear of “triggering” students. Part of education is learning how to deal with academic topics in the context of one’s own background, and how to cope with uncomfortable or “triggering” situations. The real world outside of the bubble of high school and college will not give us the comfort of “trigger warnings” or “safe spaces.” In college and high school communities abundant with people of diverse

experiences and backgrounds, we have the opportunity to explore delicate matters with input from varying perspectives. Trigger warnings and physical safe spaces that allow people to back out of these situations not only removes unique contributions to the discussion, restricting the holistic nature of the conversation for others, but also shelters them from the reality of ongoing dialogue over highly controversial but fundamental issues. With the increasing prevalence of trigger warnings littering the internet, classroom assignments, and school lectures, I have found in this growing trend that students, when warned, expect to be triggered by sensitive material. Students harbor the assumption that the content of the talk, lecture etc. will be disturbing as it is prefaced by such a warning, and thus enter the discussion with a less open perspective on the matter, and an artificially exaggerated emotional sensitivity to the material. This ongoing debate over providing trigger warnings or safe spaces to students has come to the forefront of College campuses around the country . While some universities have long supported creating a comfortable environment for students with these warnings, the University of Chicago recently announced that it did not support “trigger warnings” or the creation of “safe spaces” and explained that these structural comforts infringe on academic freedom. Insulating students from material promotes an unrealistic option of removal from difficult or offensive situations. Ultimately, the basis for using trigger warnings to help victims of trauma cope is misguided; the Institute of Medicine has found through repeated psychological experiments that avoidance of situations reminiscent of trauma actually reinforces associated PTSD. Though defying common perception, one of the best treatments for PTSD is exposure therapy, where the patient discusses and confronts their trauma in often emotionally distressing situations. In no way do I seek to undermine the

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Clinton’s Standard CONTINUED FROM PAGE 6 for Bill’s actions and forced to be held accountable for his mistakes? Even more disturbing is the criticism that Clinton isn’t capable of making sound decisions as a president as evidenced by her staying with Bill Clinton after he had an affair with Monica Lewinsky. Hillary and Bill’s marriage and the decisions surrounding their marriage aren’t open for the general public to pick apart and critique. Their marriage is their’s alone and nobody else’s. Hillary’s personal decisions about her marriage do not affect her qualifications to be president. The argument that Hillary is to blame for Bill’s infidelity or that she could have prevented it by being a “better wife” implies that Hillary is responsible for her husband’s actions. In actuality, his decision to cheat falls on his shoulders alone, and any of Bill Clinton’s mistakes shouldn’t have more weight on the presidential election than Hillary’s policies and qualifications. Many voters also feel that Clinton’s armored demeanor prevents them from seeing her real, emotional side. Yet, as the first woman nominated by a major party, Clinton must fight to prove that women are capable of running a country. Clinton has been criticized by Trump for not having enough “stamina” while also being criticized for her overeagerness, two contradicting arguments. Terri Vescio, a psychology professor at Penn State, says “You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. If you’re perceived as competent, you’re not perceived as warm. But if you’re liked and trusted, you’re not seen as competent.” As a female candidate, Clinton faces the impossible challenge of simultaneously showing her warmth and proving her worth as a presidential candidate. I am not arguing that those who don’t support Hillary Clinton have any form of sexist agenda. There are legitimate reasons to not support Clinton in terms of both her policies and questions of character. However, I implore people who do not support Clinton to examine the root of their dislike. Is it based on fact and disagreements over policy, or, rather, underlying biases? Unfounded claims of dishonesty often come from subconscious bias against Clinton simply because she is a woman. In the midst of this chaotic election, we all should closely examine our reasons for supporting or condemning each candidate. We must ensure our views are rooted in fact rather than in subconscious prejudice. If not, we aren’t fulfilling our responsibility to vote in the most educated way possible. None should vote without attempting to build a full understanding of each candidate. Uneducated voting could doom America to four years of a candidate it never took the time to understand. •


We’re All Winners By SERENA FERNANDOPULLE Nearly twenty-two years ago, Walt Disney Studios released The Lion King. Website BGR claims that “The Lion King really is one of Disney’s biggest hits ever,” and given the “close to one billion at the box office,” Lion King merchandise, video game, everlasting songs, broadway musical, and the number of times I’ve seen a baby or animal lifted in the air Rafiki-style, I’m not surprised. The Lion King was an iconic part of many childhoods, and has held its own for all twenty two years since it has been released. It is not surprising that there have been both excited and skeptical reactions to Disney’s latest announcement that a 2016 Jungle Book-esque remake of The Lion King, directed by Jon Favreau—who is also behind The Iron Man series and The Avengers movies, as well as for the new Jungle Book—is in the works. The new live-action remake will not only be following The Jungle Book in its animation-to-live-action journey, but Alice in Wonderland, and other live-action films, Maleficent, and Cinderella, and Beauty and the Beast which will be hitting theatres soon. Disney has had great success with these live-action remakes, with The Jungle Book and Alice in Wonderland both hovering around one billion dollars in gross income worldwide, according to IMDB. Disney also claims that this March’s Beauty and the Beast “is already one of the most anticipated movies of 2017.” Disney states that thus far there is no official release date for the Lion King project, so it could be a while before we see graphics similar to the ones used in The Life of Pi bring young Simba’s fun-loving and loyal nature to the world. Disney has also confirmed that we will be hearing the familiar melodies of the original soundtrack, so we can expect new renditions of some of our favorites, such as “Hakuna Matata” and “The Circle of Life”. Though this may sound exciting, fans have expressed doubt on the project’s success. Some fans, such as Twitter user @ beau_stancil, assert that “[he] can not put into words how excited [he] is for the Lion King remake.” Others, such as Twitter user @devinsimoneee, have stated that “no one asked for [a remake].” User @caboose_xbl writes, “Whatever is going on with the Lion King remake, so long as Jon Favreau is directing, I’m in.” Several other fans have insistently requested that James Earl Jones reprise his role as Mufasa. It will take time to find out any more details pertaining to the movie, but it’s assured that with these new revelations will come both fervor and criticism in response to the development of the childhood classic. •

Opinion

PAGE 9

What it Means to be an International Student

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By CHLOE KIM I come from the city of technology: Seoul, South Korea, the motherland of Samsung, LG, and Hyundai, the city subject to one of the most rapid periods of industrialization during the past couple decades. I grew up in the center of this booming city—in an apartment complex aptly named Hyundai Apartment—habituating myself to its customs and codes of conduct. Then after a coincidental chain of events at fourteen years old, I found myself at Milton Academy. To be fair, I lived in Saint Paul, Minnesota until I was five years old, Disney Channel was my childhood, and I attended an International School in South Korea. By the time I was fourteen America was no foreign territory, but this is not to say it was home either: there is some depth in culture that knowing a language cannot compensate for. TED Talks. Animal Rights. The Humane Society. Veganism. These are all things I knew of in South Korea, but only truly got to know and understand in America during my Sophomore year at Milton. I can’t clearly recall how this all happened, but my Milton experience somehow transformed me into a pescatarian animal rights activist. Wanting to go vegan and being passionate about animal rights served me well in America. Maybe I just fell victim to the trending wave of veganism hitting the 21st century, but that’s besides the point. People respected my decision, and more importantly, understood it. I didn’t have to explain myself. Then during break, I went back home to South Korea, my country that has unfortunately recently become obsessed with becoming Americanized, yet only in some aspects, veganism not being one of them. South Korea is both ethnically and socially very homogenous, so it is difficult to fit in if you go against the

norm. I first told my mother about my decision to become pescatarian at a dinner table in which she prepared multiple traditional meat dishes and a stew with a chicken broth base—not my finest moment of judgement. In South Korea, everyone eats meat. Animal rights is basically unheard of, and people respond to veganism with eye rolls and mocking laughter. My mother was furious. I remember nothing clearly but her glaring at me and saying: “You think you are white? I send you to America and this is what you learn?” If you are an international student, at some point during your Milton career, you will have to make a decision: will you maintain your values from home or adopt new ones you’ve learned here? Whether it be at a conscious or unconscious level, you will make a choice, and that choice has the potential to shape your Milton career as well as the rest of your teenage life. That’s why I think it’s so important that this decision be made consciously, with much thought and reflection. Like most things, there is a middle ground, and that is what I chose. However, I’ve seen many cases of students who have unconsciously shifted to either end of the spectrum, leading to not necessarily unfortunate, but definitely unanticipated results. Sports: another crucial aspect of being an international student. Simply stated, sports culture dominates America in a scale that’s nearly unimaginable for international students. The aspect of American sports culture that affects us most deeply, however, is school sports. In Asia, sports is merely recreational, if even that. In general, there are no JV or Varsity teams, and there is definitely nothing remotely resembling college

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Arts & Enterainment

PAGE 10

The Controversy Over “Black-Specific” Albums By ADITYA GHANDI In 2016, the music industry has inarguably provided a diverse collection of albums for music lovers to enjoy. Beyoncé and Solange Knowles have released two such albums, Lemonade and A Seat at the Table, respectively, which seem to have become points of seething controversy: these albums sparked political conversations due to their unapologetic celebration of blackness. Releasing “black-specific” albums into a world of diversity was an intrinsically polemical move on the part of the Knowles sisters. Among the dividing questions talked over by listeners are: How can an album be specifically for one group of people? Are people outside of the intended audience allowed to feel as if they relate to the album? Can they even listen to it? With the release of Lemonade came the implication that the album was meant solely for black women. Beyoncé never spoke publicly about the matter, but interpretation of her music was enough for fans. Lemonade recounts the tale of Beyoncé struggling in her relationship with her possibly cheating husband, Jay-Z. Yet the album is not one of sorrow, but of a black woman’s acceptance that she is strong enough on her own. In one song alone, “Don’t Hurt Yourself,” Beyoncé refers to herself as “no average b*tch,” and “God herself” who is “just too much for [Jay-Z].” But Lemonade is also a political statement meant to rally black people together. “Sorry,” the track following “Don’t Hurt Yourself,” includes a jibe directed towards “Becky,” an anonymous white girl. Some songs on the album combine messages for women and black people, thus making Beyoncé’s intentions clear. “Freedom,” as its title may suggest, refers to both Beyoncé’s desire for freedom from her relationship with Jay-Z and freedom for black people, as the song mentions “bitter love” along with “chains” and “nation hypocrisy.” The closing anthem, “Formation,” reinforces the point as Beyoncé proclaims her pride in being a black woman, singing, “I like my negro nose with Jackson Five nostrils,” then calling upon her “ladies” to join her. Beyoncé addressing black women so directly in Lemonade makes the album empowering for them; however, other groups feel left out and question their roles in listening to Lemonade. A Seat at the Table was released almost 6 months after Lemonade. Still, it provided a similar dilemma. Solange’s work is, in

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some ways, even more explicitly intended for black people than Lemonade was. Like Beyoncé, Solange never said that she did not want certain groups of people listening to her album, but her music conveys a specific message. A Seat at the Table includes a number of interludes, all of which feature men and women sharing their experiences with being black, intended to celebrate those various stories. The interludes are only supplements to the songs; in one track in particular, “F.U.B.U.” Solange reaches out to black people, saying that she made the track—and, in a larger sense, the album—to help them: “All my n****s in the whole wide world Made this song to make it all y’all’s turn For us, this shit is for us”

Solange’s bold statements make it evident that she wants to inspire black people. As a result, other fans are left with trouble decoding just how much they are allowed to participate in listening to the album. It can be reasonably said that Beyoncé and Solange did not release their music with the intention that only a select group should listen to it. Beyoncé did not make lemonade to hand out only to black women; Solange did not reserve all the seats at her table for black people. The Knowles’ devoted fans understand this, but fans who do not identify directly with the target audience still find difficulty in sharing their thoughts on the album. On the two extremes of the issue, some think that

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trauma and horrific experiences that many have lived through. The initial purpose of these trigger warnings and safe spaces was to provide fair warnings for those who had suffered traumas for which exposure to sensitive material would adversely affect their mental or physical health. However, with the ubiquitous reinforcement of this “way out,” the gravity of this purpose has been diluted. I have seen students, even friends, claim to be “triggered” by readings or videos about events I know for sure they have never even remotely experienced. Enrolled in a private prep school, most of us, myself included, have been fortunate enough to have been sheltered from acts of violence and trauma-inducing experiences that much of the world faces. For example, I can’t help but feel that by refusing to talk about rape simply on the grounds of being “triggered” by the idea of being raped or avoiding discussing shootings based purely on our fear and not personal or even familial experience of being in a violent situations, we diminish the real, long-lasting trauma afflicting families of real victims or survivors themselves, as we simultaneously hinder progressive, educationally important discussions. For our generation, important social discussions entail controversial, uncomfortable and even severely offensive stories and materials. Avoidance of these types of provocative conversations or distressing situations through trigger warnings or safe spaces only enforces an outlet and coping mechanism that, though perhaps effective in a closed, academic setting, is not realistic in a world after school. Though I completely respect and support those who have undergone major trauma, trigger warnings and safe spaces have spread to an extent where they limit open discourse and hinder students. We, in our employment of trigger warnings, should be careful to learn not only the academic and social background presented to us in school, but ensure that we also develop the ability to navigate the complex, difficult interactions that occur in the real world. •

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Arts & Enterainment

Get Some Vsauce in Your Life

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By ALEX IANSITI Vsauce brands itself as the “channel network for the curious” and has a weird name to to go along with this allure. This core concept of curiosity serves as the common idea between the entire Vsauce network of channels. Michael Stevens started the Vsauce channel as a psychology major at the University of Chicago; the channel originally served as a way for Stevens to publish memes about the 2008 presidential election. He began tying in concepts he had learned in lecture, and thus the educational side of Vsauce was born. Currently, Vsauce has a network of three main channels focusing on various topics of curiosity. Stevens still produces the Vsauce1 content which focuses on psychological and mathematical topics. For instance, one of my favorite Vsauce1 videos explains “Zyph’s mystery”, an empirically tested model showing that in any language, even untranslatable ones, the relative frequency of a word is proportional to its rank (i.e. the second most used word shows up half as much as the first, the third shows up one third as much as the first, and so on). Another video breaks down the Banach Tarski paradox, a way to break down a 3D sphere and reassemble it in a way that creates two copies of the original, thus creating mathematical space from nothing. Unfortunately, Vsauce1 now only uploads a video at most once a month, but there are enough already

uploaded to get anyone started. Vsauce2 features a different host, Kevin Lieber, describing many current scientific advancements. Lieber features projects anywhere from academia to crowdfunding campaigns. In a recent video, he highlights a project at the MIT Media Lab exploring the plausibility of programmable electronic tattoos while also touching on researchers who found fossilized microbial structures that help pinpoint a time frame on the evolution of bacteria. Vsauce2 uploads multiple times a week, so if you really don’t want to study bio, learn about smart tattoos instead! Jake Roper leads the Vsauce3 channel with videos geared towards explanations of science fiction concepts as they would exist in the real world. Recently, Roper produced a video in collaboration with Steven Spielberg on the science of actually being a Big Friendly Giant; another outlines the societal implications if a nuclear war occurred. These channels appear separate in content, but in nature, they all tie to the theme of curiosity, of satisfying our desire for knowledge. Vsauce2 and 3 are entertaining to watch on a regular basis because they demonstrate all the cool things science can do. However, the mathematical topics from Vsauce1 highlight the amazing paradoxes and coincidences fundamental to our world, creating an enthusiasm for the normally boring mathematical material. •

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Ferguson Effect CONTINUED FROM PAGE 7

didn’t. Because she didn’t want her family, or the department, the next day, to go through the scrutiny on national news.” Johnson has in the past called on residents of Chicago to help end the violence plaguing the city. “At the end of every weekend, I review the details of the violence that occurs in some of our communities, and quite frankly, I’m just sick of it.” he said. “There’s no other way to describe it, I’m just sick of it.” Johnson’s words have been echoed across the country -- the violence plaguing disenfranchised communities is an unfortunate consequence of the media’s anti-police rhetoric. When the media sensationalizes these shootings, eager to crucify the officers involved without reporting on the facts, it widens the divide between the police and the black community. In 2014, the U.S. Justice Department found claims that Michael Brown surrendered with his hands up “baseless.” The media has continually pushed the phrase “hands up, don’t shoot,” with no regard for what has been found and agreed upon by nearly everyone who has viewed the evidence to be utterly false. When the police fear the media’s reaction to the use of violence in defense of the community and themselves, officers cannot be expected to perform to the best of their ability. At the end of the day, the media’s criticism of police officers has created an environment in which policemen don’t feel safe making the difficult decisions that we rely on them to make, regardless of what the White House says. The “Ferguson Effect” has taken away the tools our police need to decrease crime rates and protect unsafe communities. •

“Black” Albums CONTINUED FROM PAGE 10 anyone can say whatever he or she wants about the album, while others think that only the select group can claim the right to relate to the album. Both perspectives have valid reasoning. For instance, a white man could listen to Lemonade and say that it reminds him of his strong, independent spirit. This could be acceptable, since he is free to feel whatever he wants; however, it could just as easily be argued that it is offensive to black women that he refuses to recognize that the album was made in honor of their struggles. Due to the debate’s philosophical nature, the arguments lack concrete evidence. Thus, there is no clear “right answer,” and the controversy remains unresolved. •


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Arts & Enterainment

New Music Friday

Podcast Paradise

By LIZ FOSTER

By THEA McRAE, CLARE LONERGAN, AND HANA TATSUTANI

“Starboy” by The Weeknd (feat. Daft Punk) “Starboy,” a new track coming from Canadian R&B artist The Weeknd and French electronic duo Daft Punk, evokes the feeling “I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.” Personally, I consider myself a fan of both acts, but this song does not show off anyone’s musical strengths. Instead of depicting a convoluted romance or his all too familiar experience with drug abuse, Abel Tesfaye sings about how he’s now “a motherf***** starboy,” presumably stemming off of the commercial and critical success of his latest LP Beauty Behind the Madness. Tesfaye brags about lamborghinis, his model girlfriend, and how he “made your whole year in a week.” The Weeknd not only employs an overused trope of showing off his seemingly unattainable success, but does it in the most unflavorful delivery over an equally boring production. Daft Punk, well regarded as innovative and influential creative forces in the music industry, seemingly scrambled together four piano chords, unimaginative and repetitive drums, and overall offputting production in a last ditch effort to return to mainstream media. While not a bad song, “Starboy” had the potential to have both stellar production and intricate lyrical content, but sadly lacks both. “Starboy” is the first single to be released from The Weeknd’s upcoming LP of the same title, but hopefully does not accurately represent the rest of the album. “Still Breathing” by Green Day Green Day returned to the music scene with a sound that will be appreciated by emotionally confused rock fans. “Still Breathing” sonically represents the angst sound that so heavily populated the early 2000’s. In fact, this track sounds as though it could have been rejected from a band such as Simple Plan or Sum 41 and passed onto the California trio. Lyrically, “Still Breathing” conveys the theme of Billie Joe Armstrong’s struggle with drug abuse and depression, a topic frequently covered in Green Day’s music. The chorus belts the reassurance that Armstrong is “still breathing on [his] own,” instilling the kind of “we’re here for you, you’re not alone” lyrics that resonates so well with their target audience of misunderstood preteens. The guitars on this song are nothing special, but not offensive either. Added drums and synthesized vocals lead into the explosive chorus that gives the track a smooth and seamless flow from beginning to end. “Still Breathing” has me anxiously awaiting Green Day’s next release, but also wondering if it will flop along with their other recent works. “Love$ick” by Mura Masa (feat. A$AP Rocky) “Love$ick” opens up with a relatively weak flow from Rakim Mayers, a.k.a A$AP Rocky, covering issues from drinking lean to police brutality to homewrecking a girl’s relationship, in very few words. However, in the second verse Rocky spits fire over Mura Masa’s tropical sounding, trumpet filled production. “Love$ick” has a bit more life to it than Masa’s original “Lovesick F*ck,” mostly due to Rocky’s syrupy sweet vocals, talking about how he wants—more so, needs—the love of a mystery woman. “Love$ick” defines “vibes” with its overwhelming chill essence and light, but still enticing breakdowns in-between the verses. If for no other reason, the song is worth a listen for Rocky using “Kermit the Frog” as a means of talking about money. •

You might remember in our last column we recommended This American Life as a great starter for any novice podcast-listener. To recap, TAL chooses one theme each week and tells stories related to this theme in a three-act format. This week, we’ve decided to each recommend one of our favorite episodes from the archives of TAL. Thea: Episode 388: “Rest Stop”: In this episode, reporters interview pedestrians who are simply passing through a rest stop in New York City Thruway. One story includes an interview with a group of foreign students who have landed at this rest stop for a summer work program. A student explains that originally she signed up for the NY location because of its proximity to the city, but she soon realized that upstate New York is not exactly close to the Big Apple and that she had difficulty travelling without a car. I loved this episode because I don’t normally think of rest stops as an integral part of my daily routine, but I learned that for some, these stops are actually an important part of their life. Clare: Episode 597: “One Last Thing Before I Go”: This episode chronicles the experiences of people who, either at the prospect of imminent death or in response to the passing of a loved one, have made final efforts to make amends and say goodbye. In Japan, after the 2011 tsunami and earthquake, a phone booth began to serve as a line of connection between the living and the dead. Although the phone booth isn’t connected to a real line, it gives mourners the chance to “dial up” a loved one who has died or has gone missing and to express any feelings, regrets, or final sentiments. In one story, TAL correspondent Jonathan Goldstein reunites his own father with his father’s estranged brother. Because the two men are elderly, Goldstein sees this opportunity as their final chance to see each other, as the men have been estranged for decades. I loved this episode because the way that the brothers interacted after so much time apart is funny, sad, and just plain entertaining. This episode was everything good about TAL: important, emotional, and informative, while also being funny and lighthearted. Hana: Episode 489: “No Coincidence, No Story!”: The producers of TAL reached out to listeners in this episode and asked them to send in stories of crazy coincidences. Out of over 1,300 submissions, they chose the most mind-boggling coincidences, and aired the interviews. Trust me, I’m a sceptic in the truest sense of the world, but some of these stories truly made me rethink what is possible. In one act, Sarah Koenig, a producer, interviews a man named Blake who sent a random picture of himself as a kid to a friend, looking to change his friend’s phone background. The friend, upon receiving the photo, noticed that her grandma was in the background of the photo, which was taken 18 years ago. Furthermore, the picture was taken in Canada where both Blake’s family and his friend’s grandma happened to be vacationing at the same time. Some of the coincidences were wilder and some less so, but all of them completely bizarre. This fun listen showcased the other side of the podcast’s narrative style. •


Presidential Debates & American Youth CONTINUED FROM PAGE 6 question of the second debate, asking the candidates to say just one thing they respected about the other candidate, prompted a superficial answer. Mrs. Clinton redirected the question to Trump’s children, and Mr. Trump complimented her desire to never-back-down. Mr. Trump’s children are not Mr. Trump, and, frankly, Trump probably doesn’t respect her unwillingness to back down; in fact, he called on her to pull out if she didn’t retract her “deplorable” comment in full. The American population, outside of the extremes on either side, can see that the behavior in the debates provides a real problem for our country – but to what extent? Ultimately, one of these candidates will become president. Nearly every person over the age of four knows the President of the United States of America. They know him (or her if America elects Mrs. Clinton) as the ultimate power in the country or the world. The president should be a model person, a standard. Most children, ages four to twelve, see the president and, now more than ever, his or her actions in the debates, as the gold-standard. Even their own parents and peers point to the president as a figure of supreme power. Parents teach children to obey the law and government, and, at the top of that system, sits the president. Children’s opinions and behavior are quite malleable. They listen to their parents, to their peers, but, if the whole world places the president on the highest pedestal, won’t their brains possibly mold to fit “presidential” actions? Sure, parents, teachers, friends can do their best to raise a child to be a model citizen, but most people if not idolize, at least obey power. What American children see in the debates – kids now watch everything – in many cases influences them more than musicians, actors, and even parents. And what influences them? They see lying, bickering, and insulting. Unfortunately, this temperament is the current political climate in the United States. America is stuck with this way of politics, and it is crystal clear that this behavior can and most likely will alter the upbringing of America’s youth beyond the immediate control of parents, teachers, etc. This behavior is detrimental, and everyone should be aware of its ripple effects beyond the obvious shock-value. •

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Opinion

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Being an International Student CONTINUED FROM PAGE 9

football. There is no sports recruiting. The norm is that the smartest kids in school don’t do sports and generally look down on those who do as students who use their bodies to compensate for the fact that they can’t keep up in the classroom. Naturally, stellar international students—students boarding schools such as Milton Academy enroll— aren’t accustomed to playing sports. This is why you rarely see international students— at least those from Asia—on varsity sports teams. We simply cannot keep up with or catch up to the thousands of hours American students have dedicated to sports from grade school. Join a thirds team freshman year, work hard, and you’ll be on varsity come senior year? False. Say there is a Chinese freshman and an American freshman on the thirds girls soccer team. The Chinese girl has most likely literally never played soccer, or even maybe any sport at all, in her life. In contrast, the American freshman has in fact never played soccer, but she’s played lacrosse for a year in middle school so she knows and understands sports team dynamics. She’s grown up watching her older brother play soccer on his high school team. Although both girls have never played soccer before, the American girl is already steps ahead of the Chinese girl, just because sports has been so embedded in her culture. This disadvantage with sports hasn’t affected me personally because I solely dedicated my Milton career to writing, but I’ve noticed it affect many international students, especially boys. Because of the social pressure for boys to be athletic, most boys play, or at least try out for, sports in high school. Due to the same reasons above, however, international boys can’t keep up with American boys. This discourages them, but I want to say that it’s not their fault. This doesn’t mean that they are not as well-built or strong as American boys, they just grew up in a different culture. You do not have to be on varsity football to prove your masculinity. Every other spring, accompanied by one staff member from the business office, Mr. Bland travels to South Korea, Japan, Hong Kong, and China to visit alumni and student parents of Milton Academy. Anyone who’s ever been in the same room with Mr. Bland knows the effect of his warm presence and gentle yet charismatic nature—naturally, parents love him. He shares campus news, tells entertaining anecdotes, offers one-onone meetings, and does everything he can to captivate the parents and alumni to take interest in and feel connected to our school. During his stay, Mr. Bland never openly asks for donations, but such is implied in much of his rhetoric and even in the mere fact that he travels long and far to visit our families. As much as I believe in the kindness of strangers, as my mother used

to always tell me: nothing comes for free. Charmed by his presence and feeling appreciative of his long journey to connect with them, after his visits, many of our parents feel compelled to donate large sums to Milton Academy. Although this money comes from generosity, one can certainly argue that it also largely comes from formality. So while acknowledging Mr. Bland’s—or, rather, Milton Academy’s—honorable intentions to connect with families abroad, I can’t help but think that rather than seeing international students as standard members of the Milton family, maybe we are seen as sources of revenue. According to the Milton Academy website, 35% of our students receive financial aid. I failed to obtain statistics for how much of that percentage is comprised of international students, but I’d be surprised if that number exceeds the single digits. As far as I’m aware, despite the fact that most boarding schools offer generous sums of financial aid to many of its students, for international students, money is a prerequisite. Combined with plane tickets, allowance, and donations, the total sum of money parents of international students invest into their children’s education may easily be double the amount of that paid by other students’ parents. This is not to criticize Milton Academy’s financial aid system, since obviously it should be need-based. International students pay more is because they can afford it, which, from the outsider’s point of view, is fair. Personally, however, despite the fact that my family doesn’t have to worry about money, I do. As a teenager who knows near to nothing about making money, the price of my four year Milton education is a number I cannot quite fathom except for the fact that it translates to a lot of pressure on me to make the most out of this education my parents paid for. It is my duty as their child—their biggest investment—to make it worth it for them. As I said, nothing comes for free. I love Milton. Just like most students and graduates, Milton has offered me the best high school education I can imagine. Personally, Milton’s English Department and Faculty have drastically changed my life and opened so many doors for me that wouldn’t have been in any way possible if I stayed in South Korea. I’ve made lifelong friendships here, and Milton’s become so much of a home for me that when nosy strangers ask where I’m from, and I feel uncomfortable telling the truth, I often just say that I’m from Milton. With that said, however, even after living at Milton for three years, in the back of my mind I’m always aware that this is not my motherland, and I am a foreigner, a tag that that comes with many strings attached. •


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Sports

Friday Night Jazz

Friday Night Lights

By NAVPREET SEKHON On Friday, October 14th, Milton’s football team upset BB&N in a close game of 4441 late into the evening. Min Park (I) stole the game with a field goal in the last thirty seconds of the match. As this game was the annual Friday Night Lights game, many students, parents, and teachers travelled to the game by either riding the train, carpooling, or driving with parents as the school failed to provide a fan bus this year. The Friday Night Lights game draws the most support from the student body for the team, so when the Jazz Concert was scheduled for the same day, many jazz students worried that their concert would be overlooked by the game. Realizing this conflict, the administration moved the concert to Thursday, October 20th—the night before Parent’s Day. For students in both the football team and jazz concert, this change helped them not have to choose between either commitment. However, that the jazz concert was moved instead of the football game, other students felt that the school values our sports over our music program, and this is a recurring complaint. Maggie O’Hanlon, a tenor saxophone player, felt that the original date was “more appealing” as it was a Friday night, more students were on campus, no work was due the next day. Although the move was difficult, Maggie knows that students “should not be punished” for pursuing both music and sports. Even so, given that the jazz concert was scheduled well in advance before the Friday Night Lights game, both the jazz group and football team found the overlap frustrating. Wes Hudson (I), captain of the football team and bass player, said the conflict was a “pain” because the group had prepared for the concert and were ready to play on Friday night, but then they learned they had to reschedule the concert. However, the Thursday concert allows more parents to attend and Wes explained that “a concert with people who really care and want to attend is better than a concert of kids who showed up because they didn’t enjoy the weekend activities.” This general conflict signals one of the primary complaints of the student body. Wes and Tristan Manuel (I) are committed to jazz and football, but they find that fully participating in both activities is almost impossible. “The football program wants us to focus more on football, and the jazz program wants us to focus on jazz,” said Tristan. Moreover, the athletes and musicians not only have to balance sports and music, but also maintain a strong academic record.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 16

COURTESY OF MAXPREPS.COM

By GABRIELLE FERNANDOPULLE Last Friday night, the Milton Academy Varsity Football team battled their way to a 44-41 win against ISL rival BB&N. Despite being down 11 points after the first half, the Mustangs pulled out an incredible second half with 28 unanswered points. The momentum shifted towards the end of the first half, when Min Park (I) scored a field goal to close the half. Teammate and captain Freddy Okito said “a very important highlight of the game was Min’s field to end the half . Because when you think about it we won by only three points if he hadn’t made that field goal who knows how the ending results would’ve been.” The 28-point scoring streak began with a diving catch in the end zone by Freddy Okito close to the end of the third quarter, and senior Mike Silva calls the play “the best play of the game”. In the final seconds of the game, Freddy describes how “the very last play of the game when the mess up the snap and Turq hits the quarterback and John Minicus recovers it to seal it.” was definitely a great way to end an exciting matchup. Though the game was away, a huge mustang fan base made the trek to Cambridge for the annual “Friday Night Lights” game. Senior Freddy Okito said “Fans were a big help to our win. If not for them I don’t know how we would’ve kept the momentum and stayed alive. There’s just something about listening to those fans that gets your adrenaline going and keeps you moving forward.” The fan support was a great display of school spirit, and the commitment from so many people to make the drive through rush hour (with

no fan bus) to the game. Jack O’Brien (I) thought, “It was lit. Most people showed up at halftime because of the early start time, but the ‘stang gang came out in strong numbers. Personally, I love when people come to my games so I was more than happy to drive up to Cambridge and support the football team. I had a ton of fun and congrats to the football team on a great win.” To many of the seniors, players and fans alike, this was a last opportunity to show off that #mamustangpride at a Friday night football game. Sophia Wilson-Pelton (I), a dedicated supporter, said “The fans were super high energy, and a lot of the seniors were leading cheers and stuff. We all knew it was our last night game and we wanted to make it as wild as possible. I really think we helped them win because they were kinda down but then we came and got super rowdy and gave them some more energy.” Similarly, senior captain Freddy Okito stated “When we went in at Halftime down 21-10 I looked at some of the guys faces and people were down and everyone thought this game was over. But I knew that could not be the mood or we were going to lose. So i just tell everyone there’s a whole lot of game left and if we keep fighting we will not lose. I told the seniors this was our very last under the lights high school game so give it all you have.” Freddy took away a valuable lesson from the game: “When we went out and beat them, I found out the true character of this team- and that is no matter what sort of situation we are in, as long as we pick each other up we could overcome everything. And that’s exactly what we did.” •


Sports

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Mustangs of the Week: Lanie Cherry and Andrew Josephs

By SARAH WILLWERTH Almost halfway through their season, Milton Academy girls soccer is off to one of their strongest starts in recent years. Although the team is almost half seniors (twelve girls will be graduating in the spring), there is a large amount of younger talent on the squad as well. This returning skill will prove vital to the squad, too,

By THEO MIAILHE Though it is a much different team than last year’s, the varsity boy’s soccer team have had some solid standouts, with Jack O’Brien (I) bagging in nine goals. But even more important was Andrew Josephs’ (I), having subtly assisted nearly all of O’Brien’s goals. The keen-sighted assister has been invaluable for the Milton

since they hope to continue thriving in future years. One younger player, Lanie Cherry (Class IV), has shown amazing potential and become a key player on the team in only the first few weeks of the season. Last week she was also MA_athletics mustang of the week for her stellar performance in the team’s 2-0 win over Groton. She earned the honor after the Groton coach reached out to Mr. Kahn, the girls’ varsity coach, commenting on Cherry’s outstanding defensive ability to shut down one of the best offensive players in the league. Lanie explained that the end of the Groton game is her fondest memory of the season so far because it felt so good to secure a win against such a talented team. In addition to her defensive skills, Lanie managed to score for the Wolfpack this past Saturday in their match against BB&N. Her goal ended up being essential, for she tied the score at 1-1. “I felt really happy to be able to help my team, and it felt good to know that I may have made a difference in the game,” Lanie remarked. Clearly, she has been an important member of the team, and she’s definitely making a difference. Across all sports, Lanie’s greatest strength is her ability to improve. She noted that she believes there is always room for improvement in all aspects of athletics. Lanie works hard in both practice and games not only for the team and coach, but for herself as well. One of her biggest hopes for the season is to “learn a lot from [her] teammates and improve as a player.” At this rate, her goal shouldn’t be too hard, given her impressive performance so far this season. “I always rely on my teammates,” Lanie told me, “and hopefully my teammates feel like they can rely on me.” There’s no question that Lanie, alongside her other rising soccer peers, will accomplish a great deal throughout her Milton soccer career. • team this campaign. If it were not for Andrew and his 6 assists, Jack and the rest of the Milton team would not be the players they are today. Andrew believes “assists are just as good as goals,” and he applies this mantra to his play every time he gets on the pitch. But enough about the soccer, who is Andrew Pierce Milton Josephs, the man behind the goals? A backup dancer, maybe; more importantly he is a person with thoughts, feelings and desires just like the rest of us. It all began at Hillel Preparatory School in Kingston, Jamaica, where Andrew entered in sixth form and instantly began loving it. This was the first time the identity thief would sport the all blue kit before joining F.C Bolts Boston when he immigrated to America. He now resides with his mother in Fort Lauderdale where he enjoys shopping for shorts and golf. It took a lot of courage for Andrew to come to America; he had a good life in Hillel. Some of his passions there included acting, rap battling, and taking mirror selfies. A huge fan of OVO, Andrew loves both Popcaan and Drake, and the Pittsburgh Pirates. He also enjoys acquaintances with Yohan Blake and Usain Bolt, and shares a huge enthusiasm for fishing, Guy Harvey and all sorts of other marine life. At the age of 15, Andrew enjoyed a brief stint with the ‘Young Reggae Boyz’ playing at U15 level internationally, and he has the backpack to show for it. At Milton, Andrew’s passions include accents, Irish step, and Amnesty International, yet he still has lots of time left to make his mark on the Milton community. Who knows, you might see him in a couple theatre productions this year. In the future, Andrew wants to continue to ply his trade at the next level for USD or the like, and we wish him the best of luck in his endeavours. •


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Sports Friday Night Jazz CONTINUED FROM PAGE 14

While many Milton students face this conflict, athletes and artists often have to choose between either program because the scheduling doesn’t work or they risk having an even harder time academically. For example, if a student wants to participate in a play, but also plays a sport that season, then the student is forced to choose between the commitments because the after-school schedule does not accommodate both activities. Actors who have almost three hours of rehearsal every day must also fulfill a sports requirement, leaving less time for homework and every

other commitment Milton students face. Seniors are applying to college, playing sports, participating in arts, maintaining grades, and trying to sleep. Other grades face similar stressors, and overworking the students leads to sleep deprivation, overt stress, and potential unhealthy choices—this problem has identified year after year. Students express their discontent consistently with these requirements; simply stated, we should be able participate in the activities that we want to pursue, as Milton promised us when we arrived and as Milton encourages us when we think about plans for the future. The football-jazz issue found the return of the student body’s unwavering complaints, so the issue was not just about Milton not providing a fan bus or a mistake in scheduling, but rather about our need to prevent these conflicts for athletic artists. •

Weekly Cartoon

Say Something Positive By LILLY LE


Puzzles

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Crossword

Created By MALCOLM McCANN 1-, 27-, 54-, and 74-across are what you should do with your money for The Milton Paper. Subscribe at themiltonpaper.org for the answers next issue! Post your completed crossword on facebook, tagging The Milton Paper Facebook page, to enter to win a $15 Dunkin Donuts gift card. Winner will be picked Thursday October 27.

Across 1 Monetary commitment 7 Container in mail room for short 10 Red gem 14 Napping 15 Ligament athletes tear 16 Old Testament book 17 Bones in the arm 18 Ultimate winner 20 Red Sox Pitcher nickname from 2007 to 2012 22 Neither here ___ there 23 Small salamanders 26 “I like didn’t need to hear that” 27 Contribute 31 Joke among kindergartners 32 German possessive. 34 Inhabitant of country bordering Yemen and UAE 35 Axe site? 37 Big inits. in automobiles 39 Engineer’s group: Abbr. 40 Big name in polling 42 “___ Run” (1975 Springsteen single) 44 “I am ___ a crook” 45 Co. that purchased AT&T in 2005 47 Small lump 49 Incognito writers: Abbr. 51 Charming, confident 53 Australian kicker nickname 54 Bequeath 56 MLB statistic 57 Socialist slogan: “Feel the ___!” 58 Diabetes drug for short. 59 Between baritone and alto or counter 61 Mentor’s group 65 Cowardly 69 Country in same region as 34-across 70 Common word 71 Turing’s favorite machine 72 Common room descriptor 73 Attempt 74 Give

Down 1 Exclamation 2 Baton Rouge school 3 Tree. 4 Real estate agreements 5 Halliwell of the Spice Girls 6 Stoic philosopher 7 Necessary preparation for shipping 8 Scottish “Gee!” 9 Highest alpine peak 10 Scold 11 Gun of Israel 12 Dude 13 “___ Can Cook” (culinary show) 19 Point deep under the ocean floor 21 Major record label 23 Govt. eco agency 24 Omitted, gone without 25 Misspelled vegetable, or fruit? 28 Grazing land for cows 29 What TMP is not, visually

30 German for “never” 32 Metric meas. 33 Diplomat’s HQ 36 Fake bananas 38 Satisfied 41 Network with regular pledge drives 43 Anonymous litigant 44 Snag 46 Woman’s bow 48 Very long time 50 Does lawn work 52 Emancipator’s nickname 55 Healthy bread choice 57 A good place for thinking? 60 “Deal ___ Deal” 61 Line up sights 62 Dr. ___, rap god 63 Shuttle mobile 64 Mess up 66 Old version of HDMI port 67 911 call respondent 68 Watch me whip, watch me ___


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Puzzles

Sudoku Parents, Sudoku is a great way to waste time if you are stuck in a class where the kids speak a language you don’t understand.

Satire

The Ideal College Essay By TEDDY BEAUDOIN

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF THE MILTON MEASUE

My Harvard summer program professor once told me “to be or not to be.” At the time, I wasn’t quite sure what the professor actually meant, but I decided to interpret his words and live my senior year by them. After pondering his words over a smooth scotch, I came to the conclusion that I would rather “be” than “not to be.” I have pioneered a few incredible things over my life. For instance, in fourth grade, I was the first white kid in 13 years to win the Huckabee junior spelling bee contest. In addition, I took high school math classes starting in the sixth grade because my parents made me attend the Russian School of Math since kindergarten. Now, I take numerous math classes at prestigious universities.

Now, I’m going to quote Mark Twain in order to convey my previously mentioned journey with “being.” Mark Twain remarked in his works that “I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.” As I have straight A’s, I, too, refuse to let such a trivial thing like grades impede my learning. As I strode across our affluent, suburban campus on the first day of school this year, I contemplated both the words of my Harvard summer program professor and Mark Twain. First, I wanted to learn this year rather than focusing on grades because I value learning more than anything in this world. Secondly, engaged in and start as many clubs and trivial activities that I could in order to look impressive on paper. The learning rather than focusing on grades part was simple – to say the least – for a man of my stature. My proficiency at being what some haters

would call “book smart” is unparalleled. So, the majority of my time was spent on “being.” Right from the very beginning, I tried to imagine what I thought Milton was missing. A metaphorical light bulb appeared above my head! Our school needs a hangman class. I am the founder of this club. The words speak to me as they appear. What do the blank spaces mean? What does it mean to know a word? The nature of the man who will be hanged raises questions about what it means to be human. Who are we? What are we doing here? That is what I do each week. While I partake in so many other activities that I don’t have enough space to mention such as the community service trip to Houghton’s pond that I went on and grew profoundly from, I will conclude by referencing the great Julius Caesar: “I came, I saw, I conquered.” •


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Parents: Like what you see? Want us to have a succesful year? Please donate or subscribe! Dear members of the Milton Academy community, The Milton Paper is Milton Academy’s only fully independent publication, meaning that we have the freedom of minimal censorship in the topics we cover and the criticism we publish. In order to remain a fully independent publication, however, we must also maintain our financial autonomy. Thus we rely entirely on subscriptions and donations to provide the Milton community every week with thought-provoking editorials, investigative journalism of Milton-related issues, scathing movie and music reviews, the latest updates on sports teams, and hearty laughs. To continue publishing each week, we need your support. It costs about $300 to print every Friday. Additionally, we understand the ecological implications of our print publication, and thus, we plan on offsetting our carbon emissions through donations to carbon reduction charities. Therefore, we ask that you please subscribe or donate to The Milton Paper. If you enjoyed reading our publication, learned something new, thought about an issue a new way, or laughed at our back page, please help The Milton Paper continue to provide the community with an independent collection of student voices. To subscribe or donate: • Visit our table on the second floor of the Student Center, where we will be accepting all major credit cards, cash, and checks. • Go to themiltonpaper.org • Email themiltonpaper34@gmail.com • Send a letter with your preferred subscription and a check to: The Milton Paper, 170 Centre Street, Milton MA, 02186

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The 34th Editorial Board Malcolm McCann, Elliot Burnes Letitia Chan, Cheyenne Porcher, Mateen Tabatabaei, Marshall Sloane, Henry Westerman, Chloe Kim, Henry Burnes


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