outlook
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The Voice of Ohio’s LGBT and Ally Community
LUXE FOR LESS
SPRING SPRING FASHION FASHION THAT THAT WON’T WON’T PUT PUT YOU YOU IN IN FORECLOSURE FORECLOSURE
2016 OHIO GET TO STEPPIN’ AIDS WALKS
CENTRAL OHIO AIDS WALK HONORAY CHAIR
CIFF GAYS IT UP
vol 20 • issue 11
april 2016
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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!
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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!
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For LGBT wedding tips, read Brooke’s column on Page 16.
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vol 20 • #11
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you are here snapshot
qmunity briefs
qmunity: ARC Ohio
complete the circuit trans point analysis
dyke like me
interview: Alan Cumming in the shade insightout
creative class: CIFF
small pond: College Hill Coffee Co.
bookmark
luxe for less calendar: Columbus
April’s Shower of Activity We have a lot to celebrate this month in Ohio. Spring’s in full swing and it’s baseball season! (Which might only be a good thing for a week or two, as Reds and Indians fans know all to well.) We also survived the March 15 presidential primary without rioting in the streets. And we survived the final episode of Downton Abbey without rioting in the streets. So what’s going on in April?
We can’t turn our backs now. Two other great events are taking place in Northeast Ohio. On April 16 in Akron, PFLAG members from across Ohio will gather for the group’s annual state conference. They continue to be our best allies. And on April 23 in Cleveland, MetroHealth will host what has become an annual Job Fair for transgender residents of the region who are seeking work. Transgender Americans are unemployed at twice the national average, and more than 40 percent of those who have jobs are underemployed.
There will be AIDS Walks in Columbus (April 16), Toledo (April 17) and Dayton (April 23). Our calendars in the back of this issue will I’ll be walking in Toledo with my family and give you all the details you need on commufriends, and I invite you to join me. nity events. There are also gay men’s chorus concerts, theater productions and, just Next to Pride, nothing makes me happier as when you thought Donald Trump’s departure made Ohio safe once again, two pera member of the LGBT community than formances by Justin Bieber. seeing people come together at these annual fundraisers. It was LGBT Americans Enjoy! and our families, friends and allies who banded together to fight HIV/AIDS when our Bob Vitale, Editor-in-Chief government turned its back in the 1980s.
snapshot
calendar: Cleveland
calendar: Cincinnati
savage love
ASSOCIATE PUBLISHERS Bob Vitale / Chad Frye
HEADQUARTERS Outlook Media, Inc. 815 N High St, Ste G, Columbus, OH 43215 614.268.8525 phone / 614.261.8200 fax SALES Chad Frye / cfrye@outlookmedia.com Mike Moffo / mike@outlookmedia.com NATIONAL ADVERTISING Rivendell Media - 212.242.6863 EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Bob Vitale / bvitale@outlookmedia.com MANAGING EDITOR Erin McCalla / erin@outlookmedia.com CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Brooke Cartus, Debé, Aimee Hancock, Ryan Harris, Erin McCalla, Michael Para, Dan Savage, Regina Sewell, Debra Shade, Brynn Tannehill, Bob Vitale, Mickey Weems ART DIRECTOR Christopher Hayes / art@outlookmedia.com
CONTRIBUTING DESIGNERS/PHOTOGRAPHERS Jessica Campbell, Ryan Harris, Aimee Hancock, Steve Vaccariello CYBERSPACE outlookohio.com outlookmedia.com networkcolumbus.com twitter / fb: outlook ohio Outlook is published and distributed by Outlook Media Inc., on the first day of each month throughout Ohio.
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The views expressed in Outlook are those of the individual authors and do not necessarily reflect the views, policies, or personal, business, or professional practices of Outlook Media Inc., or its staff, ownership or management.
calendar: Dayton
calendar: Toledo
PUBLISHER Christopher Hayes
Outlook Media Inc., does not investigate or accept responsibility for claims made in any advertisement. Outlook Media Inc., assumes no responsibility for claims arising in connection with products and services advertised herein, nor for the content of, or reply to, any advertisement. All material is copyrighted ©2016 Outlook Media Inc., All rights reserved.
Network Columbus @ Wexner Center 03/09/16
the divine life
‘toons
Big Gay Sing @ Lincoln Theatre 03/12/16
puzzling
on the cover:
puzzling solution - puzzle on pg 35
Photo courtesy of Steve Vaccariello.
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next month: we ♥ Ohio people
april 2016
Cincinnati HRC Gala @ Horseshoe Casino 03/05/16
Queer Queens of Qomedy @ Funny Bone Comedy Club 03/02/16
Send your event photos to art@outlookmedia.com.
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It’s never too early to think about Pride advertising. Call us at 614.268.8525.
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A&F, Cardinal Health Back Federal Equality Legislation
Missing Columbus Man Last Seen at Union Café
Joey LaBute left the table at Union Café at about 12:30a on Saturday, March 5, and hasn’t been heard from since. Family, friends, police and members of the Columbus LGBT community all have joined the search for the 26year-old man who was last seen at the gay bar in the city’s Short North neighborhood.
The last text he sent Jnhstioj - was received at 1:22a by a friend who dismissed it at the time as a pocket text. Columbus Police say LaBute is white, 5-feet-9 and 135 pounds, and has brown hair and brown eyes. He was last seen wearing charcoal jeans; a flannel shirt with brown, offwhite and reddish-maroon colors; and a blue T-shirt underneath.
Columbus-based Abercrombie & Fitch and Cardinal Health Inc., are among 60 U.S. employers who have signed onto a business coalition in favor of expanding federal antidiscrimination laws to include sexual orientation and gender identity. and other nearby areas of Columbus on Saturday, March 12. Police said security cameras inside Union yielded no clues.
If you have any information to share with police, call 614.645.4545. BRAVO, Ohio’s LGBT anti-violence organizaLaBute’s bank account hasn’t tion, says you can call its ofbeen touched. His car and fice first if you feel more apartment were found the way More than 200 volunteers comfortable. That number is he left them. searched the Short North, Ital- 614.294.7867. ian Village, Victorian Village
Colleges Wig Out With Spring Drag
What is it about spring that makes college boys want to step into a pair of heels?
competition at Akron’s Interbelt Night Club (70 N. Howard St., 44310) on Sunday, April 24. It’s scheduled for 9p-11p.
Four Ohio schools will host drag shows in April, Wright State University will host its 13th anincluding a competition in which Northeast nual Drag Revue on Friday, April 8 at the StuOhio rivals will dent Union Apollo Room (3640 Col. Glenn Hwy., go wig to wig: Dayton, 45435) from 8p-11p. It’s a $10 donaQueens and drag tion to get in. kings from Kent State University Also on Friday, April 8, the University of Cincinand the Univer- nati will host its Spring Drag Show at the sity of Akron will Tangeman University Center Great Hall. It’s stage a drag from 8p-10p.
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and Marriot, Hyatt, Hilton and Choice hotels. Ohio and 31 other states allow discrimination against LGBT people, although Gov. John Kasich said he thinks anti-discrimination laws here go far enough. National proposals have been introduced in Congress for about 20 years but never have gotten through both houses of Congress.
The Human Rights Campaign, which coordinated the group, said the companies involved have more than 4.2 million employees in all 50 states. They account for a combined The current legislation, referred to as the $1.9 trillion in revenue. Equality Act, was introduced a month after the U.S. Supreme Court’s June 2015 ruling for The list includes Microsoft and Apple; Face- nationwide marriage equality. book, Google and Twitter; Coke and Pepsi;
TransOhio Founder, Chair Steps Down From Board After founding the organization in 2005 and serving as its chair for more than 10 years, Shane Morgan has stepped down from the board of directors of TransOhio.
traveling and getting to spend time with friends and family in ways I’ve really not had the time to do for a long time. This is a big change for me and I’m excited to be open to what comes next.”
TransOhio board members said they accepted Morgan’s resignation “hesitantly,” “This is an exciting time for TransOhio, and I “with the understanding he will be available have complete confidence that everyone is in as a resource of experience for the organizagood hands,” Morgan said in an announce- tion.” New officers of the board are co-chairs ment of his decision. “The last 11 years has Melissa Alexander of Columbus and James really provided me an opportunity to do some Knapp of Akron, treasurer Arykah Carter of Cincinnati, and secretary Aran Reinhart of amazing things, and what I’ve learned is priceless and will always be a part of me. I’m Berwick. New board members are Michelle looking forward to really being able to spend Moore, Lachlan Anderson and Brooke Testersome time focusing on my work. Doing some man, all of Columbus.
Around Ohio
Cincinnati: Applications are due Fri- summer. Members will perform at Chicago
Pride on Sunday, June 26. Don’t worry, day, April 15, for PFLAG scholarships awarded to LGBT and allied students who are though. They’ll still be at Columbus Pride on from or attend college in the Greater Cincin- Saturday, June 18. nati area. Visit pflagcinci.org for info and apDayton: Barb Lotney, who founded plication forms. PFLAG’s Dayton chapter in 1983, passed Cleveland: All Ohio students from away on Feb. 25 at the age of 77. “Barb was 17 to 25 are eligible for the $500 Pride Schol- the epitome of love,” reads an item in the chapter newsletter. “She knew instantly what arship to be awarded by the LGBT Commuencouragement each of us needed when we nity Center of Greater Cleveland. Visit walked into PFLAG meetings. ... We cherish lgbtcleveland.org to get more info and your her memory.” application form, because the deadline to apply is Friday, April 29. Toledo: Steinem’s Sisters, the feminist Columbus: Flaggots Ohio, the LGBT archive and library housed at People Called flag corps, is taking its show on the road this Women bookstore, now has more than 140 titles in its collection.
Thank you for your service, Shane Morgan!
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No one smiles when they are moving.
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Frogger! They have Frogger!
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PREP, PLUS...
Doctor’s Advice: Don’t Ditch Condoms With HIV-Prevention Drug When we read the news that a 43-year-old Toronto man had contracted HIV despite his adherence to the HIV-prevention regimen known as PrEP, we knew just where to turn for an explanation. In the following article, AIDS Resource Center Ohio, the state’s leading HIV/AIDS services organization, tells us all what it means. by Dr. Michael F. Para
A 43 year-old gay man (who was not an injection drug user) self-reported using PrEP daily for two years and had regular, negative HIV tests through February 2015. In April 2015, he had multiple condomless sexual encounters as a bottom. In May, he began having gastrointestinal issues and tested positive for the HIV antigen (indicating a very recent HIV infection).
At this year’s national AIDS Conference on Retroviruses and Opportunistic Infections, an annual gathering of HIV/AIDS researchers, I had the opportunity to listen in on a presentation that has garnered a lot of attention. A Canadian physician presented the case of a PrEP patient who acquired a multi-drug resistant HIV infection.
Shortly afterward, his blood was taken, and his PrEP drug levels were consistent with him taking Truvada as prescribed. The virus was tested and appeared to be resistant to emtricitabine (one component of Truvada) and partially resistant to tenofovir (the other component). There were multiple other HIV medications to which this virus was resistant as well.
While this is not uncommon in people who do not reliably take their PrEP medication (Truvada), it is very uncommon in people who do. Up to this point, no study had definitively documented a new HIV infection in someone consistently taking Truvada.
Based on this information, it appears the virus causing this infection came from a single person who most likely had not taken HIV medications regularly and is consistent with resistance to Stribild, a very popular singlepill anti-HIV medication.
It was such a notable case that the conference organizers selected it for an oral presentation.
This case highlights several issues worth discussing.
The specifics were this: outlookohio.com
First, this patient acquired a virus that was very resistant to HIV medications, including Truvada. While such viruses occur, they are
uncommon, with less than 5 percent having such resistance. They usually are found in people with HIV who have not been taking their medications consistently. Second, for people with HIV who faithfully take their HIV medication, the viral level in blood and sexual fluids is reduced to undetectable levels. This markedly reduces HIV transmission. To date, we have zero confirmed transmissions from someone who is undetectable, despite thousands of recorded sex acts. Third, all clinical trials of PrEP encouraged participants to use condoms. In these studies, with high adherence to Truvada and this guidance, there was nearly 100 percent prevention of HIV in men who have sex with men (statistically this is described as 95 percent confidence limits of 86 percent to 100 percent). While many PrEP users find themselves in situations where condoms are unavailable, this is not the guidance participants were given.
the chances of acquiring and transmitting syphilis and other STDs. Statistically speaking, such an infection was bound to occur, but the fact that this person had taken PrEP for two years without infection still supports the use of Truvada as an effective HIV-prevention tool along with condoms. AIDS Resource Center Ohio already is serving more than 400 PrEP patients through our medical centers in Columbus and Dayton. We are the largest community-based provider of PrEP services in Ohio. In addition to PrEP, ARC Ohio also offers Post-Exposure Prophylaxis (PEP), the Plan B for HIV, which when started within 72 hours of exposure significantly reduces the chances of becoming infected with HIV. The ARC Ohio Medical Centers are scheduling new PrEP appointments with no current waitlists. Scheduling is easy, and staff are available to walk you through the process of finding out if PrEP is right for you. Visit ohioprep.org for more information.
Lastly, PrEP reduces the chance of HIV infection. It does not reduce the likelihood of infection of other STDs. Columbus, Cleveland, Cincinnati and Dayton are in the midst of a syphilis epidemic, and condoms help reduce
See Page 18 for information on Ohio AIDS walks.
Dr. Michael Para is the Columbus medical director for AIDS Resource Center Ohio. He also is on the faculty at Ohio State University. april 2016
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MAKING AMERICA CANADIAN AGAIN
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circuit
Republicans Should Nominate Trudeau for President
by Mickey Weems
After having descended deeper and deeper into the abyss, the Republican National Committee has thrown caution to the wind and nominated Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau as its candidate for president of the United States. “We had to do something. We knew we were in deep shit way before the field began to narrow,” said an anonymous RNC representative. “Think about who we had to choose from. Rand Paul and Chris Christie should have known better than to even take the stage - not enough crazy in either of them to satisfy the base. Ben Carson is so dull he makes himself sleepy - if he’d opened his eyes and said more weird crap about stabbing somebody or how the pyramids were designed for grain storage, he might have had a chance, the poor bastard. Jeb Bush his campaign was just plain sad. I bet he now wishes he hadn’t fixed Florida for his dumb-ass brother. Then there’s Kasich - his own state hates him almost as much as New Jersey hates Christie. “Rubio speaks Spanish just a little too well and can’t handle pressure - when he’s in front of the media he’s like a rent boy in church. Imagine him standing up to Putin. Ted Cruz - nobody, I mean nobody - wants him as our candidate except for Hillary Clinton. And The Donald! MTV approached him about doing a season of The Real World set in the White House. He agreed, so we took him by gunpoint to an undisclosed location until the elections are over. He’s under lockdown right now with Cruz and Mitt Romney. We are taking no chances with them doing something stupid. Again.” So why Justin Trudeau? “He has it all! Like Cruz, he’s Canadian. Trudeau’s much more dreamy than Rubio, and his wife is a bigger babe than Trump’s. Best of all, he’s French, so he is totally offensive to a huge demographic, a winning strategy we learned from Trump. Besides, we know for sure that Trudeau is Straight! If he were queer, he’d say so because Canadians would love him even more and crown him emperor instead of prime minister. His guaranteed Straightness makes him so much more believable than any of our candidates. I’m not calling anyone a fag. But 12
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We’ll take him.
we’ve had too many bad experiences with Republican ‘family values’ candidates who end up being closet queens.” Why would the GOP nominate somebody who is even more liberal than the Democratic nominee? “Look, we tried giving the American people the red-meat rabid candidates that they wanted. For Chrissakes, we even got them talking about dick size, no homo! But that was the absolute limit. We could not get more extremist without handing out hoods and swastikas, so we flipped in the other direction.” The RNC has also chosen Ronald Reagan as Trudeau’s running mate. “The base loves Ronnie so much, they will vote for him even if he’s deceased. Truth be told, Trudeau was not our first choice. We were gonna run Ronnie for president under the slogan, ‘After All These Years, Reagan Is Still Dead Right.’ The ultimate laissez-faire candidate! But Ronnie already served two terms, so we decided he’d make a great VP instead.” Does a Trudeau presidency mean that Canada would take over the USA? “Not at all,” said the GOP representative. “It’s just the next logical step forward. America has been outsourcing jobs for a while. Why should the presidency be any different? Oh, and we’re outsourcing all of Congress to Germany so it can get things done.” But Trudeau has made it clear he does not want to become America’s president. Isn’t that a deal breaker? “He refuses to do interviews. He will not accept calls from the media or even travel to the USA, which gets his supporters even more fired up. Now that is a bold move!” exclaimed the RNC spokesperson. “When people found out he won’t make robo-calls, won’t mail out flyers and won’t engage in long, drawn-out debates, his approval rating shot through the roof. The Democrat Party doesn’t stand a chance.”
Mickey Weems is a writer, educator and creator of The Qualia Encyclopedia of Gay Folklife. Visit mickeyweems.com, qualiafolk.com or email him at mickeyweems@yahoo.com. Look for his next column in the May issue of Outlook. outlookohio.com
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transition point analysis
e c a n e m
Look Out! They’re Coming to Get You! by Brynn Tannehill
Nowhere can it be seen more than in the relentlessly conservative movie industry. In The American public needs to wake up to the 2015, you could count the number of movies most sinister plot ever levied against our great featuring healthy lesbian and gay relationnation: the Heterosexual Agenda. Figures in ships on your fingers and still have digits to the media, universities and schools continue spare. to push this unhealthy lifestyle choice on our vulnerable youth. The damage caused by this Heterosexual relationships are portrayed in choice is undeniable. nearly every movie, without ever addressing the astounding harm they cause. Meanwhile, Almost all teen pregnancies and unintended Poe and Finn’s relationship in The Force Awakpregnancies are caused by irresponsible, reck- ens is left at no more than a lip bite. less people who have been convinced that heterosexual activity is somehow acceptable. Militant heterosexuals have abused the law to Almost all abortions are a result of people en- spread their agenda. The “heterosexual gaging in the heterosexual deathstyle. mafia” has formed secretive organizations around the nation to forcibly indoctrinate Choosing to engage in the heterosexual youth into the heterosexual lifestyle. They have lifestyle harms children. Recent studies of les- abused the Constitution by claiming it’s part bian families found zero substantiated cases of their religions to pull youth into their death of child abuse. Most documented cases of cults of heteronormativity. They claim religious child abuse, poverty and neglect are a result freedom when rightly being accused of abof heterosexuals who refuse to take responsi- ducting and brainwashing youth. bility for their sexual promiscuity. Inside these religion-based re-education The United States pays a heavy price for het- camps, children are forced to endure endless erosexual behavior. In 2015 the federal govhours of chanting and memorizing heterosexuernment spent $8 billion supporting alist propaganda. They’re punished for quesstate-level child welfare services, and $6 bil- tioning dogma and rewarded with a little extra lion more feeding the unfortunate offspring “freedom” for successfully parroting the propwho resulted from the scourge of heterosexual aganda spewed at them. Eventually, those acts. In 2012, states spent more than $28 bil- who have been turned are used as adults by lion on welfare, cleaning up the financial mess these “churches” as willing slave labor to go created by irresponsible, self-proclaimed “het- out and recruit the next generation of victims. erosexuals.” When confronted about their so-called heteroThe sinister heterosexual pressure on vulnera- sexual identities, purveyors of the Heterosexual ble, impressionable youth is omnipresent. Agenda can only offer up lame, subjective ra14
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tionales for their self-destructive behavior. Heterosexualists often say that people are “born this way,” without offering any scientific proof. Instead, they give only subjective evidence like “I always knew,” or “I experimented in college but it just wasn’t me.”
Barbra Streisand. Getting girls involved in fast-pitch softball, LPGA golf and vocational summer camps for arc-welding will help prevent bad lifestyle choices.
Impressionable children should know about the danger of strangers knocking at your door, Most militant heterosexuals claim they can’t particularly when Jehovah’s Witnesses or Morchange because God made them that way. Yet mons have been seen lurking in the neighborsomehow, when asked if they ever tried being hood. Protect kids from the unhealthy homosexual, they vehemently deny it. As a re- influences of heteronormative movies like Tisult, these self-proclaimed “heterosexuals” tanic or The Notebook. Provide them with role have never even made the attempt to be gay, models like George Takei and Ellen DeGeneres. yet they claim that change is impossible. They are like petulant children screaming that they Sometimes, confused youth will express hethate a particular food, without ever actually erosexual attractions. The appropriate rehaving tried it. sponse is to tell them you love them, but that this sort of thing isn’t acceptable in your The goal of the heterosexual agenda should be house. If they persist in these assertions, you clear by now: to ensure that every single child should consider sending them to theater in America is corrupted into heterosexuality, camp. The success rate of these institutions one by one. They use the media, religious has been phenomenal and largely ignored by brain-washing and coercive behavioral modi- the conservative media and a conspiracy of fication to convince these children they have biased scientists. no choice but heterosexuality. Above all, remember, only you can prevent the When anyone tries to leave this deadly lifestyle Heterosexual Agenda. it results in social, economic and physical exile from the cult that they have become depend- (Note: This article is a work of satire, and ent on. Survival is based on complete and should not be taken seriously. By anyone. Reutter orthodoxy. ally.) But there is hope for our children. Getting them involved in wholesome, appropriate activities can prevent them from being consumed by the Heterosexual Agenda. For example, introduce your boys to musical theater, men’s fashion and the complete works of
Brynn Tannehill is a former naval aviator and former Xenia resident who can be found on Twitter @BrynnTannehill. She writes a column for Outlook.
Ricky grew up to be a teen idol and then produced more teen idols: Gunner and Matthew of the band Nelson.
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Thanks to all our advertisers and readers for two decades of support! You rock!
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Cray/Factory on 4th will be featured on an upcoming episode of Restaurant: Impossible.
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dyke like me
GAY WEDDING
ETIQUETTE Your Ultimate Glitter Guide to Wedding Season by Brooke Cartus
way (gross, but accurate).
If you have the privilege of running into your ex, you have many options (some involving subtly pouring champagne down her back), but my solution has been and will always Marriage equality has been legal across the continue to be this: Be a boss. Be cordial. Be nation since last June, but we missed out on some sweet spring wedding months. Now we so goddamn lovely that your ex will almost can get married in any state across this fabu- forget about the time you... were absolutely terrible. Because let’s face it, we’ve all been a lous country! Pretty f*cking sweet, right? little bit terrible. But remember as we head into gay wedding season - otherwise known as wedding season Also, unless you are the couple-to-be, THIS DAY ISN’T ABOUT YOU. So suck it up, hit up - to take some tips from your newly ordained that buffet and ignore the person who briefly minister, the Rev. Brooke Cartus. made your life hell. However, if the ex is the person GETTING married, you’re allowed to Yep. I can marry you. CRAZY. bring a flask to the ceremony. It’s here! The first official full wedding season!
Tip #1: Think of Each Gay Wedding Like a Mini Gay Pride. So Your Ex Will Be There.
No matter how big the city, town, county or hamlet, everyone says the same thing: “Our scene here is so small.” Columbus is like the GAYEST city, and Ohio has some incredibly vibrant gay communities, but odds are you have definitely hooked up with someone who is only two degrees of separation from your latest ex. We don’t need to make a chart to figure out that one or two people on that guest list are people you have had your mouth on in some
outlookohio.com
want to figure that sh*t out IN ADVANCE.
But that’s bullsh*t; even Target has gay wedding cards.
Also, what kind of kitchen appliances are they bringing to the relationship? Crucial questions here, people.
I’ve actually even seen guests complain to the couple about how annoying it was to find a card because they didn’t have any at the Many couples already have a blender and store. THEN YOU ARE GOING TO THE WRONG matching bath towels. What they want is STORE. This is just an example of a well-inMONEY... for a honeymoon, a car, whatever. tentioned topic of conversation that doesn’t And by you going to this wedding, you are say- end well: I know you are trying to make the ing YES! I buy into whatever you want to do, grooms or brides feel like you are hip to their because it is your day. So don’t complain struggle, but you aren’t. And it’s awkward. about giving money, or even worse, don’t go And frankly, just order that sh*t online. In adrogue and buy them something they didn’t vance. Like an adult. even register for because you just saw it and thought, “This is SO them! They will love it!” Bottom line: It’s not your party. Enjoy the awesomeness that is the FIRST. FULL. GAY. Spoiler alert: They won’t love it. At best, they WEDDING. SEASON. Years from now, you will will return it or regift it. be the cool lesbian aunt talking with your grand nieces and nephews about how gloriTip #2: Don’t Go Rogue. Tip #3: Don’t Complain to ous the first gay wedding season was, how Buy From the Registry. luxurious and full of glitter and bubbly wine. Because gay marriage JUST became legal (re- the New Couple About Big, naïve eyes will look up at you as you exmember last June? That was a fun hangover), How Hard it Was to Find a plain that last summer of decadence and love remember that a lot of couples have been liv- Card for Them Because before Dictator Trump took over America and ing together for years when they decide to tie of Their “Lifestyle.” destroyed its joy, its laughter and its people. the knot. OK, this one is more for allies, but I cannot tell Live it up. Like this may be our last incredible I personally think you should live together be- you how many friends I have that open up summer. their wedding cards and the front of the glitfore you get married so you can figure out... tery stationery says His & Hers with the Hers oh... I don’t know, if you are actually compatible. Sex is great, but does the person you want cleverly crossed out. WE GET IT. You forgot to Brooke Cartus is a Chapstick lesbian get a card and ran into Walgreens at the last to spend the rest of your life with treat the with a law degree. You can find more minute. of her writing on her blog, Size L for hand towels in the bathroom like they are a Lady, at brookecartus.com. Look for drunk grizzly bear dabbing his paws? You
Attend Outlook’s Love Big wedding expo in Dayton on Sunday, April 24.
Dyke Like Me every month in Outlook.
april 2016
17
COMING
TOGETHER
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Alan Cumming Speaks About AIDS, Advocacy and Meeting Elaine Stritch
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april 2016
Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!
Photo Courtesy of outlookohio.com Alan Cumming
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by Erin McCalla He’s Peter Florrick’s chief of staff. He danced with Romy and Michele at the high school reunion. He Willkommen-ed you to the cabaret - and won a Tony Award for it, too. And now, Alan Cumming is honorary chair of AIDS Walk Central Ohio on Saturday, April 16. Outlook spoke with Cumming about AIDS advocacy, his run on The Good Wife and his album, Alan Cumming Sings Sappy Songs: Live at the Café Carlyle. Cumming will make opening remarks prior to the Columbus 5K, and anyone who raises $1,000 or more will have the opportunity to meet him at the Grand Walker breakfast. EM: Do you think that HIV/AIDS is still getting the attention it deserves within the LGBT community? AC: I don’t. I really don’t, especially amongst young people. I think there are a variety of reasons for that, partly complacency amongst people who - my generation who have lived through it a bit and it’s not such a death sentence. I think there’s a real sway of complacency. ... I also think there is a kind of fatigue about it. For 30 years it’s been a huge plague, and it’s kind of under control but not quite. And I just think it’s actually something that everyone knows is there, but actually not too terrible but it’s pretty terrible if you get it. It’s one of those things where we’re on the cusp right now and we’ve got to kick it back into play. EM: And that’s why you’ve decided to get involved? AC: Yeah. And it’s interesting with Nancy Reagan dying, and the Hillary Clinton thing, she said Nancy Reagan had been a pioneer talking about AIDS. And that’s absolutely not true. I think that because there was such a silence from Reagan and his administration, it was communities that came together. It was actually a grassroots movement that got these antiviral drugs. And it’s still community that comes together. That’s why I like things like these walks where people come together and raise money and awareness. It’s also good for people to come together to just talk about things, to acknowledge what they’ve been through and what they are fighting for. EM: What other causes are you involved in,
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“I have this idea for, well basically to wear pajamas all day. It’s my goal to wear pajamas all day, and to go wherever and look stylish.” and organizations that are close to you, personally? AC: Well, I’m involved with several other HIV/AIDS organizations and a lot of youth things - LGBT youth and education things. The Point Foundation that helps people go to college, and Live Out Loud. ... There’s quite a few in New York that I’m involved with. ... I’ve just become an ambassador to the U.N. [to work] with LGBT refugees. What’s awful about that situation is they’re coming from a country that everyone’s leaving, but often having to go to countries where they are not accepted because of their sexuality. It’s a double whammy. So there’s a new commission at the U.N. that’s trying to help them out. EM: That’s really interesting! AC: Yeah, it is! It is interesting. I went to the U.N. for this talk, and there were a couple of guys there with OutRight, a watchdog for human rights abuses against LGBT people around the world, ... saying how awful it is to be thrown out of your country because of this regime that everyone is terrified of, but when you get somewhere you’re not even safe then. So it’s kind of awful. EM: You’ve done it all: theater, film, TV, music, writing. Everything. Is there anything in the entertainment industry that you haven’t tried yet that you want to do? AC: There’s nothing that I think, “God, I’m dying to do ... opera” [laughs], but there’s al-
ways things I’m doing. I think because I have done so many things, people think, “He might be up for this” and lob something new at me. So I really never say never. I don’t know what it would be. One weird thing that I’m getting into now is sort of clothes designing - well, not really clothes designing - but I have this idea for, well basically to wear pajamas all day. It’s my goal to wear pajamas all day, and to go wherever and look stylish. EM: YES! AC: And I’m trying to invent, with these clothes distributor people, a way to do that. To basically have leisure gear that looks stylish. And you can wear it to work, and then you go out to a cocktail party and you look chic, and then you can go home and go straight to bed and not take your clothes off. EM: I’m into that. AC: Me too. I want to call it “Cumming All Day Wear.” EM: I have a lot of friends who are big fans of The Good Wife, and they are very sad at that it’s ending in May. I spoke to a friend today, and he said, “Like a lot of fans, I’d love for him to have a show of his own.” What do you think about that? Or have you had your fill of Eli Gold? AC: Nobody’s asked me, and I don’t know. I can see why it would be a good idea; people
AIDS walks/runs/bike rides are scheduled in April and May in four Ohio cities. Visit the links below for signup info. The money raised will help AIDS Resource Center Ohio (in Columbus, Toledo and Dayton) and Caracole Inc. (in Cincinnati), two of the state’s HIV/AIDS agencies.
Columbus Toledo Saturday, April 16 9a registration aidswalkohio.com
Sunday, April 17 9a registration aidswalkohio.com
Dayton
Saturday, April 23 10a registration aidswalkohio.com
Cincinnati Sunday, May 15 7:30a registration caracole.org
We welcome everybody to join Team Outlook in Columbus and Toledo!
like Eli. There was talk about a spinoff for a while, actually, but more of a lawyer spin off. It just didn’t happen. I was going to leave, anyway, this year, I had decided, because the writers who made it up were leaving this year. There was always the question of how another showrunner would come on and take over. So I was always going to leave. What I think is really great - I mean, I know it’s sad it’s ending, but - it’s actually great that the writers who made it up and invented all the characters are able to bring them to an end in a way they want to and they are in control of. I think that’s really great. EM: Did you have a chance to meet some of the performers whose songs you cover on Alan Cumming Sings Sappy Songs? Like, did you ever have a cocktail with Elaine Strich? I imagine you two getting along fairly well. AC: I did. I did meet her. I didn’t have a cocktail with her, but I met her backstage a couple times. I had a nice interaction with her. I think we first met after Cabaret the first time around and some benefits afterward. She was always kind of grouchy - like all those old dames, they’re always grouchy and snipey and then you kind of engage with them in a way that’s not through fear, and then they kind of are like, “Oh. He’s interesting.” So I had a nice chat with her. I met Billy Joel. I actually gave a Tony to Billy Joel. And I haven’t met Miley Cyrus, as much as I would like to. Because I think she’s great. And a couple are dead, so I never will. EM: What about Annie Lennox? AC: Yes, I met Annie. She’s a fellow Scot, you know? She’s from quite near where I grew up in Scotland. EM: I knew she was Scottish, but I didn’t know she grew up close to you. She’s such an inspiration to so many performers in the LGBT community, whether it’s men or women. AC: She’s amazing. She does stuff in Africa with this thing where pregnant women who are HIV-positive can actually give birth to HIV-negative babies. ... She’s been at the forefront of that. It’s a really good thing.
Erin McCalla is the managing editor of Outlook and could listen to Alan Cumming’s delightful Scottish accent all day long. You can reach her at erin@outlookmedia.com. april 2016
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Let’s Talk Sex
in the shade
Honest, Open Conversation Helps Us Understand Each Other
by Debra Shade
my work compared to 50 Shades of Grey. There was a small group, and the flow and conversaI must admit that I am a complex, serious, tion was awesome. Even folks who hadn’t anal, fun, supportive and at times reckless in- wasted their time watching the movie or readdividual. When you have as many faces as I ing the book joined in. It was open, informative have, it’s hard to remember what part of you to and very well received. share with whom. Right at the end, I encouraged the group to Add to that my senior moments, and quite choose a topic for the following month and often when you see me out, I’m whoever I am they did so eagerly. It is evident that the Milat that moment. This has become my secret to lennial generation is open to conversations. As connecting with others. When people ask me sexuality is more fluid, the conversations and what I do, my answer either disturbs them and information we share is important. they get out of the conversation quickly, or an hour later we part ways after discussing the The one thing I want to make sure people hold perks of a healthy sex life. close to their hearts is the idea that your sexual satisfaction begins and ends with you. ReIn my downtime, I am usually in deep thought gardless of sexual orientation, the goal for about the next creative way to get folks want- most of us sexual beings is to experience a ing to experience better sexual relationships bliss of connection with another person or selfvia healthy and safe exploration platforms. I stimulation. was honored to represent the Lion’s Den at Sexapalooza 2016 in Columbus. Over the How pleased would you be if you were the perthree-day event, I presented five workshops on son who opened the eyes of a heterosexual to the Illusive G-spot. There were few empty the transgender community? Or the lesbian chairs. who explains the many different aptitudes in their sexual relationship? I had tried this before, and it did not go too well, so I decided to make sure people knew ex- Times are so different now. How can we get to actly what they were walking into at my events. acceptance without knowing one another intiAt the beginning of the year, I started offering mately? It’s exciting to be in this time, in this a workshop on the second Friday of every moment of acceptance. month called, “Sexy Talk and Play.” It’s a sincere conversation about sex education and I realize that my life, my story is odd, funny, personal exploration of sexual satisfaction. It’s overrated and intense to some. What I know for at Bossy Grrls Pin Up Joint (2598 N. High St., sure is that as adults, many of us are interColumbus, 43202) from 5:30p-7p. ested in learning more about sexual exploration. I have tasked myself of including all I had no idea who would show up to my first possibilities in my talks. Sexy Talk and how they would receive the conversation. Would they join? Would it be anyIf during these talks I have connected or althing like the audiences at Sexapalooza? tered understanding of human sexuality, I feel it’s worth continuing what I do. Not only did guests come out, they also participated. They even seemed eager to share. I Debra Shade is an author and owner thought people attended workshops and of Shade Media. You can find her on watched the show at Sexapalooza because Facebook at Shadyontop or follow her they felt comfortable being with like-minded on Twitter @shadeyontop. You can individuals. find her books at shademediallc.com, 20
The conversation that first month was about
april 2016
I shall have a vat of Condado’s queso, please.
Amazon.com or Lion’s Den. Her next Outlook column will run in June. outlookohio.com
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insightout
Liar!
Don’t Believe Everything Your Mind Tells You by Regina Sewell
You might not have downloaded the You Totally Suck podcast. Don’t worry. You don’t need to. It probably already has been playing in your head non-stop for years. Some days, it plays quietly in the background, audible only in moments when you feel vulnerable, when you’re trying something new or feel pressure to perform. Other days, it plays in full volume on Dolby Surround Sound speakers in your brain. Like a sibling, it tells you the very things that push your buttons, cause you pain and leave you wallowing in self-doubt. You might have episodes like “Super Fat” or “Total Loser.” The “Super Fat” podcast says things like, “Look at you. You can’t even zip your jeans. And look at that belly roll hanging over. I can’t believe you’re even thinking about eating today. You disgust me. You are doomed to be lonely and miserable. You are a weak and despicable person.” The “Total Loser” episode beats you down in a different way. This podcast tells you things like, “You’re a stupid, worthless piece of shit, a total loser, a failure. You can’t do anything right. You fuck everything up. No wonder your ex dumped you. No one likes you. Did you really say that to him/her? Don’t even try to do _______. Spare yourself the embarrassment of making a fool of yourself yet again.” The best thing to do when these podcasts start playing is silently shout in your head, “Liar!,” just like you do when you hear politicians blatantly lying on camera. I know, you can’t really argue with the podcast hosts. They can’t hear you. But it’s good for morale and sends a message to your brain that perhaps you don’t have to believe the podcast. This might free you up just enough to turn the volume down.
unlovable and unlikable. Who told you that you weren’t smart, athletic or successful enough? Was your parent? Your siblings? A supposed mentor? What messages did you take in from media that led you to hate yourself? The more you can identify where you got the messages that play in your head, the more you can say, “Not mine” when the messages play. It also helps to listen to the podcast with the same discerning ear you use when you listen to other things. The copy is poorly written. Notice how it repeats itself and usually ends up on the fallback of a few key mean statements like, “You suck.” Heard this way, the You Totally Suck podcasts sound like they were written by an imbecile. And reality check: You don’t have to believe the You Totally Suck podcasts. Even if they contain grains of truth, the underlying message that you are not worth anything and don’t deserve to be loved is a lie. You are absolutely lovable. It’s helpful to come up with more positive messages, the kind that make you feel good when you hear them. Maybe start with something like, “I have nice eyes (or cute feet, or warm hands)” and, “I brushed my teeth today.” Build up to more positive messages like, “I’m kind,” “I’m funny,” “I’m smart enough.” And finally, add the positive messages you wished you could believe, like, “You’re brilliant!,” or, “You are absolutely and completely lovable.” Write these messages on sticky notes or notecards and stick them in places where you’ll see them.
Put them on your bathroom mirror. Put them next to your computer or on your desk. Stick them to your remote control. Put them on your dashboard. Read them. If you imagine that you This is where the real work begins. You have to believe them, someday you will. challenge the messages. Identify where the messages came from. Where did you get the To ask Regina a question, propose a column topic, read about her approach idea that having a belly or curves or extra to counseling, or check out her books padding makes you despicable? Name the and other writing, go to people who told you, in one way or another, ReginaSewell.com. that being fat makes you, or people in general, Insight Out will run again in June.
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Change the channel.
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by Luke Darby For 40 years now, the Cleveland International Film Festival has been bringing the newest and best films from around the world to Northeast Ohio. From March 30 to April 10, the festival will screen 193 films and 213 shorts, and out of that batch a whopping 20 feature films cover LGBT issues. Among them are the world premiere of an Ohio original, Kings, Queens & In-Betweens, and a screening of Akron, which is a gay love story set in Medina. Just kidding, it’s set in Akron, and it’s about two University of Akron freshmen who fall in love. Director Brian O’Donnell, an Akron native, told Outlook last year that his film focuses on gay characters but doesn’t focus primarily on their orientation. “Culture has changed,” he said. “Where once there was a focus on difference, people are now living with a deeper understanding of and openness to each other. I wanted my screenplay to reflect that new reality.” Kings, Queens and In-Betweens is a documentary about the Columbus drag scene that goes deeper than queens. It explores the city’s multifaceted communities of drag performers. 22
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“I knew Paris is Burning, and I researched for the next few months every film I could get my hands on,” said director Gabrielle Burton of Five Sisters Productions. “I didn’t find any that included drag kings, queens and transgender performers, so I thought it was time to do one.” Kings, Queens & In-Betweens premieres Saturday, April 2 at Tower City Cinemas, where all films will screen. Akron will be shown twice: on Wednesday, April 6, at 1:50p at Tower City, as well as on Friday, April 8, at 7p in Akron at the Akron-Summit County Public Library, 60 S. High St. Here’s a rundown of the other 18 LGBT films. Visit clevelandfilm.org for the entire festival lineup and ticket information.
Arianna: The first fiction feature from director Carlo
Layagna is the story of an intersex woman, now in her late teens, returning to her childhood home in rural Italy. This Italian-language coming-of-age story explores gender identity and youth, starring newcomer Ondina Quadri. Wednesday, April 6, 9p; Thursday, April 7, 5:15p.
Blush: High school student Naama is struggling to
deal with her family as she grows up in Tel Aviv. Caught between her father’s temper and her mother’s obsession with her missing older sister, Naama’s life opens up when she falls in love with new girl Hershko. But their young love pushes Naama’s family tension past the Visit clevelandfilm.org for the entire CIFF lineup.
breaking point. Sunday, April 3, 6:15p; Tuesday, April 5, 11:25p.
Closet Monster: Teenager Oscar is planning to
flee his hometown for New York City, where he can achieve his dreams of being a make-up artist. But he’s also struggling with a homophobic father and being a witness to a hate crime. Fortunately his hamster, voiced by Isabella Rossellini, has his back. Friday, April 8, 7:25p; Saturday, April 9, 4:50p.
Daddy: Successful and middle-aged Colin is launching a new talk show when he falls for his station’s beautiful new young intern, Tee. Colin’s best friend, Stewart, senses something amiss, but Colin refuses to listen as Daddy heads for its hilarious and erotic conclusion. Monday, April 4, 7:15p; Tuesday, April 5, 2:05p.
Desert Migration: They are the Lazarus men, the
survivors of the AIDS epidemic. Thanks to medical breakthroughs, they’ve made it to old age, but that’s presented a whole new set of problems: how to grow old with HIV. The survivors have made a community for themselves in Palm Springs, Calif., where, surrounded by the desert, they’ve found acceptance. Tuesday, April 5, 9:30p; Wednesday, April 6, 2:15p.
First Girl I Loved: Anne falls in love with Sasha, a star softball player at her high school, much to the frustration of her friend Cliff, who’s in love with Anne him-
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The New Man: Transgender Stepha-
self. Not your typical coming-of-age film, First Girl I Loved doesn’t just show youthful bursts of passion; it confronts their consequences. Friday, April 8, 4:10p; Saturday, April 9, 8:45p.
nia’s family gave her up to the military back when she was 12 years old and still Roberto. She sets out to reunite with her family and introduce them to the woman she’s become. Wednesday, April 6, 11:35a; Thursday, April 7, 9:20p.
From Afar: In Caracas, Armando picks
up beautiful young men off the street and pays them to pose for him. When one of these boys beats and robs him, instead of being put off, Armando becomes obsessed with the young man, following him and risking more violence. Monday, April 4, 9:45p; Tuesday, April 5, 5:10p.
Oriented: This documentary follows Akron (2015), Brian O’Donnell, Sasha King.
Front Cover: When Asian-American
fashion stylist Robert is assigned to introduce rising Asian actor, Ning, to American audiences, he has the chance of a lifetime to make his career. Ning’s old-fashioned machismo and homophobia seem like an insurmountable obstacle, until one night of clubbing changes everything. Sunday, April 3, 7:20p; Monday, April 4, 2:45p.
Out to Win: While pro athletes coming
Arianna (2015), Carlo Lavagna.
Henry GambleÊs Birthday Party: A pool party for 17-year-old Henry
Story: Equally celebrated and derided, the gay porn industry is too big to ignore. In the 1970s, Falcon Studies was a porn empire, ruled by the divisive figure Chuck Holmes. Wednesday, April 6, 7:40p; Thursday, April 7, 11:50a.
Hunky Dory: This film grapples with
Henry Gamble’s Birthday Party (2015), Stephen Cone.
I Promise You Anarchy: Lovers
Miguel and Johnny make a living by selling blood on the black market in this dark Spanish-language thriller. When a big score goes wrong, Miguel and Johnny find themselves up against cops, other criminals and a barrage of plot twists. Thursday, March 31, 8:50p; Friday, April 1, 11:45a.
Sworn Virgin: To avoid being married off in northern Albania, Hana has lived for years as Mark, a celibate man. Miserable and finally reunited with his sister, Mark embarks on a journey to understand himself in this quiet character study. Monday, April 4, 11:45a; Tuesday, April 5, 7:15p. Those People: Wealthy Sebastian
Kings, Queens & Inbetweens (2016), Gabrielle C. Burton.
Love Is All You Need?: Every-
thing you know about sex and gender is flipped in Love Is All You Need?, set in a high school where the majority of kids are gay and girls play football. Director K. Rocco Shields uses this alternate reality to explore the impact of bullying. Thursday, April 7, 4p; Friday, April 8, 8:30p. The New Man (2015), Aldo Garay.
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out of the closet still makes national news, it’s easy to forget that openly gay athletes like David Kopay and Billie Jean King blazed a trail back in the 1970s. This film celebrates the history of LGBT athletes. Thursday, March 31, 4:40p; Friday, April 1, 11:30a.
Seed Money: The Chuck Holmes
Gamble turns into an existential night of self-discovery as he grapples with his burgeoning sexuality and his Evangelical megachurch preacher father. Thursday, March 31, 11:50a; Friday, April 1, 8:50p.
ideas of success, art and fatherhood, as failed glam-rocker Sidney moonlights as a drag queen to make ends meet and unexpectedly winds up caring for his 11-year-old son. Friday, April 1, 7:30p; Saturday, April 2, 11:30a; Sunday, April 3, 9:30a.
three gay Palestinian men living in Tel Aviv as they form a cultural resistance group. Qambuta, or cauliflower, is dedicated to winning hearts and changing minds as they challenge ideologies on the cyber battlefield. Sunday, April 3, 9:20p; Monday, April 4, 4:50p.
That’s Columbus’ own Virginia West beating her mug.
seems to have everything, but as the son of the most hated man in New York he has few friends, save Charles who unrequitedly loves him. But then handsome, older Tim arrives, vying for Charles’ affection in this romance set in wintery New York. Friday, April 8, 11:10a; Saturday, April 9, 7:15p; Sunday, April 10, 5p.
Luke Darby is a Cleveland-based freelance journalist who writes about food and politics. Follow him on Twitter @dukelarby. april 2016
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small pond
Cincinnati ’s College Hill Coffee Co. Celebrates 10 Strong Years by Aimee Hancock For almost 23 years, the Cincinnati building that is now home to College Hill Coffee Co. and Casual Gourmet has been a coffee shop in one form or another. Its current incarnation is now celebrating its 10th anniversary under the management of owner Tina Stoeberl.
After the extreme makeover, Stoeberl reopened the coffee shop on Jan. 10, 2006. She has since expanded, most recently adding an outdoor patio. The first expansion was leasing more space in the back. She also has expanded the kitchen three times and added a new pantry, office, and 100 more square feet of retail.
Stoeberl bought the business in January 2006 after a very short period of consideration. She hadn’t owned or run a business before. She worked in the health insurance industry for 25 years, “and I was kind of over it.”
The retail aspect has become an important facet of Stoeberl’s coffee shop, bringing in a large portion of the business’ profits. Items for sale include art and pottery, clothing, candy, wine and beer.
“I had kind of been thinking about it a couple of weeks - just a couple of weeks!” she said. “And I drank a bottle of wine, I made the decision, I called the owner and I said, ‘I’ve decided I’m going to do this.’ He [said], ‘Is anyone trying to talk you out of this?’ I said, ‘No,’ and he said, ‘Well, you need to find somebody to try to talk you out of this.’ Then, he gave me a book that his accountant had given him years earlier of all the reasons he should not buy the business.”
“Things that are a little flavorful or have a little flare, that’s kind of our thing here,” Stoeberl said. “It’s a fun place.”
Stoeberl wasn’t deterred. Not only was she determined to buy and run the business, she also set out to completely renovate and redecorate the space. “I thought, ‘Well, how hard can it be [to] change the look, the feel, the color, the staff, the food, the menu, and the retail?,’” she said before answering her own question. “It’s really hard!” Stoeberl was born in Germany, but grew up in Cincinnati’s West Side. She bought her first home in College Hill and has remained in the area for 30 years. It was both her love for the neighborhood and her yearning for a career change that solidified her decision to buy the coffee shop. 24
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CHCC also offers a full menu for breakfast, lunch and dinner, as well as an array of desserts. “For a place with limited abilities based on food service license, [we have] all kinds of sandwiches,” Stoeberl said. “Two soups a day, homemade chili - nothing’s out of a bucket; everything is homemade from scratch.” CHCC also has had live music on Fridays and Saturdays for the past 9½ years. “We’ve had as many as an eight-member band come,” Stoeberl said. “And then you’ve got the solo acoustic with amplifier. Some musicians come from out of town, many are local. Some people do all their own stuff; others are covers - everything from bluegrass to jazz.” Aimee Hancock is a 2014 graduate of Bowling Green State University, where she studied journalism and popular culture. She currently lives in Troy and works as a freelance writer in Western and Southwest Ohio.
“Things that are a little flavorful or have a little flare,
that’s kind of our thing here.”
- Tina Stoeberl, owner College Hill Coffee Co.
College Hill Coffee Co. and Casual Gourmet 6128 Hamilton Ave. Cincinnati, 45224
collegehillcoffeeco.com 513.542.2739 (BREW) Hours: Tuesdays-Thursdays: 6:30a-6:30p Fridays: 6:30a-10p Saturdays: 8:30a-10p Sundays: 8:30a-4p
If you are an LGBT business and want to be featured in Outlook, please email erin@outlookmedia.com.
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bookmark
and the
First Lady
Book Recounts Correspondence Between Eleanor Roosevelt, Pauli Murray by Terri Schlichenmeyer
Activism was Murray’s passion, and the answer she got wasn’t what she’d wanted. But it did, as promised, come from Eleanor Roosevelt.
You know your own mind. After thinking things through, you have your opinions and while you’re willing to listen to what others say, you’re also willing to defend what you beMurray was born in 1910, the feisty grandlieve in. daughter of a biracial slave whose stories of injustice she grew up hearing. Murray lost her And, as in the new book, The Firebrand and mother when she was just 3. A few years the First Lady, by Patricia Bell-Scott, your later, her father was institutionalized, then friends don’t necessarily have to agree with murdered. Her brother was lobotomized. you. (480 pages, Alfred A. Knopf, $30.) Eleanor Roosevelt’s Camp Tera, nestled near New York’s Hudson River, was meant initially to be a temporary, leg-up place for Depression-era women who were destitute and totally without resources. Although she was young, educated and married, Pauli Murray was there because of ill health. Recovery time aside, Murray’s tenure at Camp Tera was beneficial: A friend had told her that Roosevelt answered all correspondence, and Murray took that to heart. In 1938, a few years after she was kicked out of Camp Tera for “disrespecting the first lady,” she wrote a protest letter to Roosevelt, requesting intercession in FDR’s stance on anti-lynching laws.
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She had health problems and was often severely underweight. During one of her hospitalizations, she finally admitted that she was attracted to women, which was then considered to be a mental health issue.
she felt long after Eleanor Roosevelt’s death. I would not, under the broadest of terms, call The Firebrand and the First Lady a pleasure read. That’s not to say this book isn’t a pleasure; it’s just not something you’d pick up to relax with.
Author Patricia Bell-Scott goes deep into the politics and work of both Roosevelt and Murray (more the latter than the former), and that can be very dry. It’s informative - Bell-Scott It took a while for Murray to tell Roosevelt all tells a story that’s been largely hidden for that. Before she did, and because of that first decades, about a woman who left her mark protest note, the two corresponded for years on social issues in many ways - but it’s far in letters that offered guidance, outrage and from lively. rebuttal. The women didn’t always agree, but they always seemed to attempt to understand (Murray, a lawyer, activist and the first black woman to be ordained as an Episcopal priest, one another’s take on issues. was featured in Outlook’s Black History Month Murray supported Roosevelt in her widowcalendar of 31 notable African-American hood. Roosevelt encouraged Murray in her ac- LGBT women.) tivism. It was a support that Murray imagined
Loving Eleanor is about Eleanor Roosevelt’s relationship with Lorena Hickock.
Adding more details of Murray’s personal life might have helped; that’s what I was hungriest for but didn’t get enough of. Still, this is an important work of history and definitely worth reading, but you’ll want to be in the mood for it, particularly if you usually like lots of energy in your stories. If you’re a scholar or historian reading The Firebrand and the First Lady, though, the pace is something you probably won’t mind. Terri Schlichenmeyer is “The Bookworm” and has been reading since she was 3 years old. She lives on a hill in Wisconsin with two dogs and 14,000 books.
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We’d be surprised if one of your Facebook friends wasn’t selling Rodan + Fields by now.
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Visit Robert Mason Co. at its new location in Columbus’ Short North!
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Out & About in
Central Ohio
The Full Monty • Blue Jackets Pride Night • Justin Bieber
FRIDAY, APRIL 1 The Full Monty @ The Garden Theater, 1187 N. High St., Columbus, 43201; 614.725.4042; shortnorthstage.org: What do factory workers do when they get laid off? Stage a strip act, of course! The Short North Stage will put on the Tony Award-winning musical based on the cult film through April 17. 8p; $25-$40. SATURDAY, APRIL 2 ARC Ohio’s Pints & Paintings @ two locations: the Pint House, 780 N. High St., Columbus, 43215; and Forno, 721 N. High St., Columbus, 43215; 614.340.6777; arcohio.org: It’s a silent auction of local artists’ work to raise money for Ohio’s HIV/AIDS services agency. 6p-9p. There’s a preview night scheduled for Friday, April 1, from 4p-close at the two Short North nightspots.
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THURSDAY, APRIL 7 Ohio University Pride Society Happiest of Hours @ Wolf’s Ridge Brewing, 215 N. 4th St., Columbus, 43215; amy.e.flowers@gmail.com; FB: The Ohio University Pride Society: It’s the second annual kick-off event for the OU LGBT alumni group’s Columbus members. 5:30p-7:30p FRIDAY, APRIL 8 Red, Hot & Cole @ Main Stage, Ohio Wesleyan University’s Chappelear Drama Center, 45 Rowland Ave., Delaware, 43015; theatre.owu.edu: A musical revue of the life and music of Cole Porter features more than two dozen songs. We bet you’ll recognize more tunes than you think from the queer composer. There will be additional performances on April 9 and April 15-17. 8p; $5-10.
SATURDAY, APRIL 16 AIDS Walk Central Ohio @ McFerson Commons, Arena District, Columbus, 43215; 614.340.6777; aidswalkohio.com: ARC Ohio hopes to raise $447,000 in Columbus this year for its work treating and preventing HIV/AIDS. Please join the effort! You can still donate even if you can’t take part in the event. 9a; $20. Columbus Coyotes vs. Marysville RFC @ Scioto Audubon Metro Park, 400 W. Whittier St., Columbus, 43215; columbuscoyotes.com: The LGBT rugby team takes on a non-LGBT rival. 1p.
TUESDAY, APRIL 19 Book of Mormon @ Ohio Theatre, 39 E. State St., Columbus, SATURDAY, MONDAY, APRIL 4 Athens International 43215; APRIL 9 Pride Night With the Film and Video 614.469.0939; Columbus Blue Jack- capa.com: Elders Price and CunningFestival @ The ets @ Nationwide ham are back by popular demand in Athena Cinema, Arena, 200 W. Nation- the religious satire musical written by 20 S. Court St., wide Blvd., Columbus, South Park creators Trey Parker and Athens, 45701; 43215; 614.246.3976; Matt Stone. Performances run through Phone: columbusgayhockey.org: Sunday, April 24. 7:30p; $58-$153. 740.593.1330; COGLAHA - the Columbus athensfilmfest.org: The seven-day fest includes LGBT titles on Ohio Gay Lesbian & Ally Hockey Asso- WEDNESDAY, APRIL 20 Trailblazers Outing: Vanya and Sonia the marquee. Check the website for ti- ciation - promises that someone will tles and times; screenings are sched- get to ride the Zamboni! In addition to and Masha and Spike Night @ uled through Sunday, April 10. $6.50. the Jackets vs. Chicago Blackhawks, Stonewall Columbus, 1160 N High St, LGBT hockey teams from Columbus Columbus, 43201; 614.299.7764; and Chicago will compete in the after- stonewallcolumbus.org: The Stonewall WEDNESDAY, APRIL 6 Drawing and Painting with Paul noon. 7p; $50. group for those ages 50+ will go see the CATCO production about movie Richmond @ Stonewall Columbus, star Masha and her middle-aged, sin1160 N High St, Columbus, 43201; TUESDAY, APRIL 12 LGBTQ Prisoner Letter Writing @ gle siblings. The group will meet at 614.299.7764; stonewallcolumbus.org: Another six-week session (on the first Stonewall Columbus, 1160 N High St, Stonewall’s Center on High. 10a; $20. and third Wednesdays) begins with Columbus, 43201; 614.299.7764; local artist Paul Richmond. Particistonewallcolumbus.org: Stonewall’s THURSDAY, APRIL 28 pants can work in their choice of InsideOUT initiative is designed to Ingrid Bergman: In Her Own Words graphite drawing, colored pencil, wa- reach out to LGBT people serving time @ Wexner Center for the Arts, 1871 N. tercolor, acrylic and oil paint and in Ohio prisons. 6:30p. High St., Columbus, 43210; more; the classes are for everyone 614.292.3535; wexarts.org: A docufrom beginners to experienced artists. Columbus Metropolitan Tennis Ormentary that focuses more on Ingrid 6:30p-9:30p; $90 ($72 for Stonewall ganization Indoor Tennis Social @ Bergman the woman and mother members). The Players Club, 3333 Hill Meadow rather than Ingrid Bergman the movie Dr., Hilliard, 43206; cmto1.org: Doustar. An additional screening will be O-Town @ Skully’s Music Diner, 1151 bles play. 6:30p-10p; $25. on Friday, April 29. 7p; $6-$8. N. High St., Columbus, 43201; 614.291.8856; skullys.org: They Justin Bieber @ Schottenstein Center, WEDNESDAY, APRIL 13 weren’t as popular as the Backstreet Book Reading: True Homosexual Ex- 555 Borror Dr., Columbus, 43210; periences: Boyd McDonald and Boys, NSYNC or even 98 Degrees… 614. 292.2073; schottensteincenter.com: Even though he doesn’t look like the but MTV’s O-Town tried their best to Straight to Hell @ Wexner Center long-lost Tegan and Sara triplet anycash in during the boy band era of the Store, 1871 N. High St., Columbus, more, we have to admit we dig the late ’90s. We hope that white guy 43210; 614.292.3535; wexarts.org: doesn’t still have his dreadlocks. Author William E. Jones will read from Biebs’ latest album and can’t get “Love Yourself” out of our heads. 7:30p; $25. his book about a controversial pub7:30p; $50.50-$116. lisher and unsung sexual historian. 5:30p.
Go Jackets!
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Out & About in
Northeast Ohio PFLAG Conference • KSU vs. UA • CLAW 2016
FRIDAY, APRIL 1 Theater: Big Love @ Baldwin Wallace University’s Kleist Center, 95 E. Bagley Rd., Berea, 44017; 440.826.2240; bw.edu/tickets: This modern twist to the Greek play The Suppliants raises issues of gender politics, love and domestic violence. 7:30p; $10. More performances are scheduled for Saturday, April 2, at 7:30p, and Sunday, April 3, at 2p.
oberlin.edu/artsguide: Malibu Beach. 1962. Drag queen/playwright Charles Busch’s work is a mash-up of camp classics such as Gidget, Beach Blanket Bingo and Mommie Dearest. 7:30p; $8. More performances are scheduled for Friday, April 15, and Saturday, April 16 at 7:30p, as well as Sunday, April 17 at 2p.
FRIDAY, APRIL 15 Day of Silence/Night of Noise Party @ Unitarian Universalist Church of TUESDAY, APRIL 5 Beautiful: The Carole King Musical Akron, 3300 Morewood Rd., Fairlawn, @ Connor Palace Theatre, 1615 Eu44333; 216.556.0960; clid Ave, Cleveland, 44115; playhous- glsen.org/chapters/neo: Youth groups esquare.com: The true story of one of in Northeast Ohio are hosting this the most successful songwriters in LOUD! party after the annual Day of American music that includes hits like Silence commemoration to call atten“One Fine Day,” “(You Make Me Feel tion to bullying. 7p-10p. Like) A Natural Woman,” and “You’ve Got a Friend.” Performances run SATURDAY, APRIL 16 through Sunday, April 17. 7:30p; $30- PFLAG 2016 State Conference @ $120. Unitarian Universalist Church of Akron, 3300 Morewood Rd., Fairlawn, 44333; 330.342.5825; pflagakron.org: THURSDAY, APRIL 7 Canton Symphony Chorus: The Workshops and programs for the anMusic of Queen @ Umstattd Pernual gathering of LGBT allies and forming Arts Hall, 2323 17th St. NW, families center around the theme, Canton, 44708; 330.452. 2094; can- “Our Stories Matter.” 8a-4p; $35. tonsymphony.org: The chorus, along North Coast Men’s Chowith a full band, will perform 17 hits of the ’70s megaband, including rus: Our ’70s Show @ “Don’t Stop Me Now,” “I Want to Regina Auditorium Break Free,” “Somebody to Love” and at Notre Dame Col“Bohemian Rhapsody.” 8p; $16-$31. lege, 1857 S. Green Rd., South Euclid, 44121; FRIDAY, APRIL 8 Kent State University Lavender 321.745.7420; blazinGraduation @ KSU Student Center griverband.org: Last year, Ballroom, 1075 Risman Dr., Kent, the chorus performed a concert of 44240; 330.672.8580; kent.edu/lgbtq: music from the 1960s. Now it’s Elton, The LGBTQ Student Center honors the Bee Gees, Stevie Wonder, Fleetgraduating seniors and those who wood Mac and more. 8p; $15-$35. have contributed to the well-being of There’s another performance on SunLGBTQ students on campus. KSU day, April 17, at 3p. President Beverly J. Watson will deliver Kent State University/University of a keynote address. 5:30p-8p. Akron LGBTQ+ Prom @ University of Akron Simmons Hall, Akron, 44325; SATURDAY, APRIL 9 CANAPI’s Race at the Raffle @ The 330.672.8580; kent.edu/lgbtq: May I Tangier, 532 W. Market St., Akron, have this dance? 9p-11p. 44303; 330.252.1559; canapi.org: Dress in your Derby best for the TUESDAY, APRIL 19 fundraiser that benefits Akron’s HIV Plexus Network Night @ Heinen’s services agency and LGBT community Downtown, 900 Euclid Ave., Clevecenter. The event features preland, 44115; 1.888.PLEXUS9; recorded horse races selected at ran- thinkplexus.org: The LGBT business dom, and event tickets correspond to group gathers every month. 5:30p-8p; an ongoing reverse raffle. There’s also $10 (free for members). a silent auction, live auction and open bar. 5:30p-10p; $2o-$100. SATURDAY, APRIL 23 Transgender Job Fair @ MetroHealth Main Campus, 2500 MetroHealth Dr., THURSDAY, APRIL 14 Psycho Beach Party @ Oberlin Col- Cleveland, 44109; 216.957.4905; lege Hall Auditorium, 67 N. Main St., metrohealth.org/transgender-job-fair: Oberlin, 44074; 440.775.8169; Local companies will be on hand to outlookohio.com
meet with potential employees, and the event also will offer help with resumes, interviewing and dressing for success. 9a-4p. SUNDAY, APRIL 24 Out of the Darkness Walk @ University of Akron Stile Athletics Field House, 289 S. Union St., Akron, 44304; 330.283.8986; afsp.org: The University of Akron will host its third annual walk to support the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. 1p. Drag Competition: Kent State vs. University of Akron @ Interbelt Night Club, 70 N. Howard St., Akron, 44310; 330.253.5700; interbelt.com: The rivalry moves from the basketball court to a new venue. 9p-11p. TUESDAY, APRIL 26 Case Western Reserve University Lavender Graduation @ Tinkham Veale University Center Ballroom B, 11038 Bellflower Rd., Cleveland, 44106; 216.368.5428; case.edu/lgbt: Congratulations, LGBTQ grads! Case Western’s annual ceremony recognizes the achievements of LGBTQ students. (Oh, and welcome to the real world, kids.) 6p. Justin Bieber @ Quicken Loans Arena, 1 Center Court, Cleveland, 44115; 216.420.2000; theqarena.com: We can all agree that “Love Yourself” is about Selena Gomez, right? 7:30p; $134-$7,185. (Yes, you read that right. Over $7,000 to see Justin Bieber.) THURSDAY, APRIL 28 CLAW 2016 @ hotels and bars throughout Greater Cleveland; clawinfo.org: The annual Cleveland leather weekend returns. Among this year’s attractions: fetish speed dating, a BDSM play space, live muscle bondage gallery, and parties for everyone from pups to bears. Comedian Judy Tenuta will perform Saturday. $169. SATURDAY, APRIL 30 The Diversity Center’s Walk, Rock & Run @ Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum, 1100 Rock and Roll Blvd., Cleveland, 44114; 216.752 .3000; diversitycenterneo.org: The three-mile walk and 5K run supports the Diversity Center’s in-school programs to reduce bias and bigotry. 7a; $25.
Is it cool to be a Bielieber, yet?
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Out & About in
Western Ohio
Wright State Drag • Angels in America • Rubi Girls
SATURDAY, APRIL 2 Let’s Go Camping! A Benefit and Variety Show for the Dayton Gay Men’s Chorus @ Dayton Art Institute, 456 Belmonte Park N., Dayton, 45405; 937.530.0642; daytongaymenschorus.com: The s’mores will provide one type of camp, the chorus will provide the other. 7p; $40.
FRIDAY, APRIL 15 Clark State Theater: Angels in America @ Clark State Community College Performing Arts Center, 300 S. Fountain Ave., Springfield, 45506; 937.328.3874; FB: Clark State Theater: Tony Kushner’s 1993 Pulitzer Prize-winning play. 8p; $15. There are more performances on Saturday, April 16, at 8p, and Sunday, April 17, at 2p.
AIDS Walk Bar Crawl @ MJ’s on Jefferson, 20 N. Jefferson St., Dayton, 45402; 937.461.2437; arco- SATURDAY, APRIL 16 hio.org: Crawl, indeed! Time TBA; Rubi Girls @ Schuster Performing Arts Center’s Mathile Theater, 1 $30. W. 2nd St., Dayton, 45402; 937.228.3630; FB: The Rubi Girls: FRIDAY, APRIL 8 Wright State University Drag The queens of Dayton kick off the Dayton Philharmonic’s Motown Revue @ Student Union Apollo Room, 3640 Col. Glenn Hwy., Day- concert. 5:30p; $60. ton, 45435; 937.775.5533; wright.edu/glbtqa: It’s the 13th SATURDAY, APRIL 23 AIDS Walk Greater Dayton @ annual show. 8p-11p; $10.
University of Dayton River Campus, 300 College Park, Dayton, 45469; 937.510.9246; aidswalkohio.com: ARC Ohio hopes to raise $72,000 in Dayton this year for its work treating and preventing HIV/AIDS. Please join the effort! You can still donate even if you can’t take part in the event. 10a; $20. SATURDAY, APRIL 30 Piano Men: A Tribute to Elton John and Billy Joel @ Clark State University Performing Arts Center, 300 S. Fountain Ave., Springfield, 45506; 937.328.3874; pac.clarkstate.edu/events/calendar: Calm down. It’s not the real Elton and Billy. But Broadway veterans Craig A. Meyer and Donnie Kehr make their hits come alive. 8p; $38-$53.
Out & About in
Northwest Ohio UT Songfest • Mamma Mia! • LGBT Prom
SATURDAY, APRIL 2 University of Toledo Songfest @ Savage Arena, 2801 W. Bancroft St., Toledo, 43606; FB: UT Songfest: It’s one of the oldest traditions on the UT campus. Student groups compete and raise money for a chosen cause. 5p-10p.
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FRIDAY, APRIL 8 Little Shop of Horrors @ University of Toledo Center for Performing Arts, Center Theatre, 1910 W. Rocket Dr., Toledo, 43606; 419.530.2375; utoledo.tix.com: Audrey II still hasn’t given up plans for world domination. This is a UT theater production. 7:30p; $15 ($8 for students, $10 for seniors and faculty). There are more performances scheduled on Fridays and Saturdays at 7:30p and Sundays at 2p through Sunday, April 24.
We love tattoos. Lots of tattoos.
TUESDAY, APRIL 12 The Art of Healthy Relationships @ location and times given to those who register; 419.283.9188; FB: Young, Gay & Empowered: The local group for LGBT youth hosts a four-session workshop. There are cash and gift incentives to attend, but it’s limited to the first 16 to sign up. Mamma Mia! @ Stranahan Theater, 4645 Heatherdowns Blvd., Toledo, 43614; 419.381.8851; theaterleague.com/toledo: A jukebox musical of ABBA hits. There’s an additional performance on Wednesday, April 13. 7:30p; $35-$83. SUNDAY, APRIL 17 AIDS Walk Greater Toledo @ International Park, Toledo, 43605; 419.304.2776; aidswalkohio.com: ARC Ohio hopes to raise $35,000 in Toledo
this year for its work treating and preventing HIV/AIDS. Please join the effort! You can still donate even if you can’t take part in the event. 10a; $20. SATURDAY, APRIL 30 Born This Way Ball @ Collingwood Arts Center, 2413 Collingwood Blvd., Toledo, 43620; FB: Owens Gsa: The Owens Community College Gay Straight Alliance hosts a prom for anyone who couldn’t go to their prom as or with the person they wished. 7p; $8. Wizard of Oz @ Valentine Theatre, 410 Adams St., Toledo, 43604; 419.242.2787; toledoballet.net: Calling all friends of Dorothy! The classic is reimagined as a ballet. There is an additional performance on Sunday, May 1. 2p; 7:30p; $15$35.
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Out &Out About & in About in
Southwest Ohio Ani DiFranco • Charles Blow • Rent • Barry Manilow
FRIDAY, APRIL 1 Book of Mormon @ Aronoff Center, 650 Walnut St., Cincinnati, 45202; 513.721.3344; cincinnati.broadway.com: This musical comedy follows the misadventures of missionaries sent to Africa. Maybe leave Grandma at home, because the show contains explicit language. Performances run through Sunday, April 3 at various times. 8p; $59-$154.
Mothers and Sons @ Thompson Shelterhouse, Cincinnati Playhouse in the Park, 962 Mt. Adams Circle, Cincinnati, 45202; 513.421.3888; cincyplay.com: The drama about a mother’s love and anger about her dead son’s lover starting a new life was written by Pulitzer Prize-winner Terrence McNally. Performances run through April 17. 8p; $30-$95.
the Volley Partons, Balls to the Face, and Good Volley Miss Molly. 8:30a. Play concludes Sunday. Cincinnati Men’s Chorus: Our Family Tree @ Christ Church Cathedral, 318 E. 4th St., Cincinnati, 45202; 513.542.2626 cincinnatimenschorus.org: For its 25th anniversary season, the chorus welcomes back alumni and former artistic directors to celebrate the milestones of its past. 8p; $25. There’s another concert scheduled for Sunday, April 3 at 2p.
TUESDAY, APRIL 5 Ani DiFranco @ Bogart’s, 2621 Vine St., Cincinnati, 45219; 513.872.8801; bogarts.com: The feminist icon and “Righteous Babe” will make a stop in the Queen City on her Allergic to Water tour. Chastity SATURDAY, APRIL 2 Cincinnati Volleyball Classic @ Sports Ex- Brown will open. 7p; $25. press, 5280 State Rte. 741, Mason, 45040; cincyvball.org: Teams from across Ohio, the FRIDAY, APRIL 8 South and Midwest compete in the annual University of Cincinnati Spring two-day LGBT tournament. Teams include Drag Show @ Tangeman University
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Center Great Hall, Cincinnati, 45221; 513.556.4329; uc.edu/lgbtq: One of UC’s rites of spring... 8p-10p. Drag Show: A Night at the Movies @ Shooters, 927 Race St., Cincinnati, 45202; isqccbe.org: The International Sovereign Court’s Sir Steve Lickalotta Steele and Scot Fromeyer host performances to music with a movie theme. The money raised will be going to Outreels, Cincinnati’s LGBT film festival. 11p. MONDAY, APRIL 11 Lecture: Charles Blow @ Miami University Benton Hall Room 102, Oxford, 45056: Blow is a New York Times columnist and frequent TV political pundit who came out as bisexual in 2014. 6p-8p. SATURDAY, APRIL 16 MUSE, Cincinnati Women’s Choir Spring Concert @ The
Today for you, tomorrow for me!
Sanctuary at Community Matters, 2104 St. Michael St., Cincinnati 45204; 513.221.1118; musechoir.org: The choir’s spring concert is a collaboration with MYCincinnati Youth Orchestra. The groups will perform an oratorio called “State,” written by local student composer Nate May based on interviews with people from Cincinnati’s Appalachian community. 7p; ticket info TBA. There’s another performance scheduled for Sunday, April 17, at 7p. WEDNESDAY, APRIL 20 Beauty and the Beast @ Aronoff Center, 650 Walnut St., Cincinnati, 45202; 513.721.3344; cincinnati.broadway.com: Because every bar’s showtunes night is still playing the “Bonjour, Girl” parody, try not to sing, “Bonjour, Bernice! I love your new wig!” during the opening act. The Disney musical runs through Sunday, April 24. 7:30p; $29-$125. THURSDAY, APRIL 21 Rent @ Xavier University’s Gallagher Student Center Theatre, 3800 Victory Pkwy., Cincinnati, 45207; 513.745.3939; xavier.edu/theatre-department: The Tonywinning play follows a group of young artists in New York’s East Village as they struggle to maintain their friendships,
ideals and way of life. 7:30p; $12-$17. More performances are scheduled for Friday, April 22 through Sunday, April 24, all at 7:30p. FRIDAY, APRIL 22 Magical Music of Broadway with Lea Salonga @ 1241 Elm St., Cincinnati, 45202; 513.381.3300; cincinnatisymphony.org: Broadway legend Lea Salonga (Miss Saigon, Les Misérables) was behind the voices of Disney princesses Jasmine and Mulan and will accompany the Cincinnati Pops Orchestra. Two more performances are scheduled for Saturday, April 23 at 8p and Sunday, April 24 at 2p. 8p; $10-$105. Turnabout Show @ Old Street Saloon, Old Street Saloon, 13 Old St., Monroe, 45050; 513.539.9183; oldstreetbar.com: The International Sovereign Court hosts. 11p. WEDNESDAY, APRIL 27 University of Cincinnati Rainbow Celebration @ African=American Cultural and Resource Center, 60 W. Charlton St., Cincinnati, 45221; 513.556.4329; uc.edu/lgbtq: Honoring graduating LGBT and allied students. Sign up by Monday, April 25. 7p. FRIDAY, APRIL 29 Barry Manilow @ BB&T Arena, 500 Nunn Dr., Highland Heights, Ky., 41099; Manilow comes and gives without taking on his last tour. 8p; $19.75-$148.75.
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savage love
by Dan Savage
SAFE WORDING I’m a 27-year-old, feminist, conventionally attractive, straightish, GGG woman. Over time, my tastes have changed, and now I find myself more of a kinkster. A few years ago, my desire for kinkier sex and my willingness to take a chance came together in a mutually beneficial, exciting D/s relationship. I’ll be honest: I wasn’t as smart as I could have been. I met this guy on Tinder, and after verifying his identity, I told some friends where I’d be and I met up with him. He was great for a while, but a big move took me away from the area and I grew tired of his conventional gender ideals. I assumed I would find another partner in the future as functionally great as him but maybe a better conversationalist. Fast-forward to today. I’ve dabbled with pain and submission play with a few boyfriends with no great success. (A subsequent partner who didn’t respect my safe word, in fact, assaulted me.) I’m now greatly discouraged in my search. The cycle always goes like this: I get horny and want kink, I go looking for it online, and I am then buried in a landslide of creepiness, typos and aggression. There are just so many men out there who hate women. These men are more interested in condescending to me and bossing me around than they are in power exchange. It was recommended to me to join the local center for sex positivity in Seattle, but that costs money. I want to engage in kink to relieve stress, not to cut into my already tight budget. Are my only options perseverance or an extra grand lying around?
april 2016
“Uh-oh, kinksters: Sex cops could be coming for you next,” Elizabeth Nolan Brown writes at Reason.com. “According to a new federal court decision, Americans have no constitutional right to engage in consensual BDSM because ‘sexual activity that involves binding and gagging or the use of physical force such as spanking or choking poses certain inherent risks to personal safety.’ Thus officials could constitutionally ban or regulate such activity in the interest of ‘the protection of vulnerable persons,’ the court held.” In 2003, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that Americans have a constitutional right to get their asses fucked, and one day soon we could be asking the Supreme Court whether Americans have a constitutional right to get their asses spanked. I am the only liberal in my family. I love them, but there is no talking to them on the issues. I have come up with the idea of a Planned Parenthood jar. It is like a swear jar, but I will put money in it when I am too chickenshit or conflict-avoidant to have a hard conversation. Every time one of my family members puts up a stupid, ill-informed article on Facebook and I don’t say anything, I will put money in the jar. Any time they tell me why Hillary Clinton is the devil, I will put money in the jar. It will assuage my guilt and make those moments easier because I can smugly think: “Keep talking, the only one you are helping is Planned Parenthood.” Is this a cop-out or a narrowly tailored, appropriate penance?
- Perseverance Or Withdrawal, Eternal Regrets
- Fearful And Milquetoast, I’m Leaning Yellow
I definitely think you should keep hacking your way through the creeps, typos and aggros, POWER, and more importantly, your pussy thinks so, too - excuse me, that’s crude. Perhaps I should say: Your erotic imagination and your libido think so, too. But you may find the search for kinky play partners a little less frustrating if you devote a few hours a week to it - set a regular schedule: two hours a night, twice a week - instead of waiting until horniness and desperation drive you back online. If you search for kinky guys only when you just gotta have it, POWER, your inability to find it immediately is gonna be that much more frustrating.
Can’t something be a cop-out and a creative, appropriate penance? But whether it’s one or the other or both, FAMILY, I’m strongly in favor of anything that benefits Planned Parenthood. For those who don’t want to go through the motions of filling a jar with money before making a donation, just go to plannedparenthood.org and click Donate.
And you might want to get out there and find a kinky guy now,
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POWER, while you still can.
You can email Dan Savage at mail@savagelove.net, follow him on Twitter at @fakedansavage or listen to his weekly podcast, Savage Lovecast, every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Savage Love appears every month in Outlook and every week at outlookohio.com.
Our favorite safe word from Outlook’s sex survey? Rhonda.
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the divine life
by Debé
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Hold onto your horns, ram. You might be king of the mountain, but pace yourself. Mercury goes retrograde on the 28th, so save some energy. You don’t want to peak prematurely - think about your image! Besides, a full moon in Scorpio on the 22nd is perfect for some sexy time.
Outspoken Aries: Lady Gaga, Barney Frank, Rosie
O’Donnell, Rachel Maddow
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
April gently eases you into your birthday month, and that lack of pressure opens up your creativity. Let it all out, baby, but keep your purse strings tight. No big financial decisions at month’s end.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
You are champing at the bit and ready to make it happen. You are laser-focused and goal-oriented. You’re so Alpha! Where’d that playful girl go? Hurry up and get things done before your playmates get lonely.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
*Sigh* Like Greta Garbo, you just want to be alone, but no one’s getting the memo. Their demands make you crazy, so you might need to put your foot down to keep your sanity. Tell them no means no, and mean it.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
After an ambitious March, try kicking back in April. Take a proverbial catnap and let others run the world for a minute or two. Reflect on what you want to conquer next. You’ll be back on top (or bottom) refreshed and energized!
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
You like to plan for every contingency, and overthinking is your middle name. But let it go. You have the skills to handle anything life throws at you. Just relax and wait for the pitch; you’ll hit it out of the park.
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
You can be your own worst enemy, but it’s time to be your own BFF. Put your foot down and put yourself first for a change. A little self-gratification is in order. You know what you like, and it feels so good!
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Something’s not quite right. Life’s a box of chocolates, but when you opened it, all that was left was the orange cream. Your search for a good caramel continues. Trust me, it’s worth the effort.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
You need to ratchet down the intensity. It’s a foreplay kind of month, so stop focusing on the finish line. Revel in your sensuous side. Remember that life is about the journey, not the destination.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
Sometimes it seems like no one is speaking your language, which can be frustrating. Don’t let it get to you. Maybe a little universal language (except with your boss) will help smooth communications.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
Feeling stymied? You’re trying to change the world, and those queens are stressing over the lighting. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Just work around them and try not to trip on their train.
Handy Tip: The Romantic Idealist The Romantic Idealist heart line stretches across the hand and under the index (Jupiter) finger. This line is found on people with a clear vision who want to make a difference. They have high expectations but are very romantic.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
What a lovely, mellow month. Too bad you hate mellow. Just wait. The full moon in your sign on the 22nd should add some sting, and Mercury Retrograde will heat things up at the month’s end. Ahhhh, chaotic bliss. outlookohio.com
Debé is a palmist, intuitive adviser and metaphysical teacher in Columbus. She is available for personal readings, parties, events and workshops. For more information, go to thepassionatepalmist.com. Look for her horoscopes every month in Outlook.
How does Mercury even get into retrograde?
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lesbians 101
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Is that ball gag?
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Ain't That a Shane Across
1 ‘N Sync member Lance 5 Sonar signal 9 Strip in the locker room 13 Lorca’s eight 14 _Celluloid Closet narrator Tomlin 15 From the top 16 Pronoun for King James 17 Nicky, in Funny Girl 18 Like a fruit ready to be plucked 19 Australian drag queen a.k.a. Shane Jenek who sings 35-Across 22 Place of fastgrowing sexual activity? 23 Zero of The Producers 27 Barometer type 30 Diff’rent Strokes actress Charlotte 31 Start of a Shakespearean title 33 Teaching deg. 34 Out-of-thisworld org. 35 Official theme song of the Sydney Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras 2016 38 Rainbow shapes 39 Title for Derek Jacobi 40 Snakes in the grass 41 Feeling of bottoming out
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42 Aging first mate, perhaps 44 Role for Agnes Moorehead 46 Dante translator John 50 Shifting between male and female identity 53 S&M session souvenir? 56 Tammy Baldwin, in brief 57 Michelangelo Signorile’s column, with The 58 Jelly not for bread 59 You might find desire under them 60 Pizarro foe 61 Oral votes 62 What you can catch in South Beach 63 With mouth wide open
VDown 1 Mismanage 2 Sound of a sudden, involuntary discharge 3 Say “STATS!” in a chat room 4 Sucking candy 5 Witherspoon’s Legally ___ 6 Green fruit 7 Sophie B. Hawkins’ “As ___ Me Down” 8 Aida backdrop 9 Bite-size pies 10 “Not a Pretty Girl” singer Di Franco 11 Get-up-and-go 12 Meadow
mama 20 Like a nervous Nellie 21 Provincetown’s Cape 24 The Sound of Music name 25 Makes more bearable 26 DeLaria of Orange Is the New Black 28 Changed the decor of 29 Ban targets 31 Ohio’s “Rubber City” 32 Like a fem’s clothing 34 Longing for Garbo, for example 36 Mead, while living in Samoa 37 Ariz. neighbor 38 Blow away 42 Rough stuff underground 43 Straddling 45 Shrek and others 47 Feeling badly about McClanahan? 48 Style of “We Are Family” 49 Where to see Tom, Dick, or Harry 51 Oscar ___ Renta 52 Frequent award for Modern Family 53 Crazy like a fox 54 Hustler’s stick 55 Org. for Evan Wolfson’s peers
Answer for 1 Across: Bass. (Easy!)
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Outlook Magazine: Celebrating 20 years!
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