2 • THURSDAY, MARCH 24, 2011
CONTENTS/OPINION
OVER THE MOUNTAIN JOURNAL
MURPHY’S LAW
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The Central Alabama Senior Softball League is getting area senior citizens back in the ball game. See how this group and others are taking seniors back to their childhood hobbies. See Seniors, pages 20-22
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OTMJ.COM
rom game nights to quick day outings get more ideas for summer staycations that the whole family will love.
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oin the conversation. Sign up on our website to make comments on stories, events and more. rowse through even more photos from the area’s biggest and best social events..
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In our next issue, step inside some of the beautiful homes to be featured on this year’s Parade of Homes.
F E AT U R E S ABOUT TOWN PEOPLE LIFE TRAVEL
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SOCIAL WEDDINGS SCHOOLS SPORTS
OVER THE MOUNTAIN
JOU RNAL
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March 24, 2011
Publisher: Maury Wald Editor: Laura McAlister Features Writer: Donna Cornelius Office Manager: Christy Wald Editorial Assistant: Stacie Galbraith Sports: Lee Davis Contributors: Susan Murphy, Bones Long, Cary Estes, June Mathews, Emil Wald, Marvin Gentry Advertising Sales: Suzanne Wald, Julie Trammell Edwards, Tommy Wald Editorial Intern: Martha Blanton Vol. 20, No. 6
Over The Mountain Journal is a suburban bi-weekly newspaper delivered to more than 40,000 households in the Mountain Brook, Homewood, Vestavia Hills, Hoover and North Shelby County areas. Hot Property is a paid advertisement. Subscriptions for The Journal are available for $24 yearly. Mail to: Over the Mountain Journal, P.O. Box 660502, Vestavia Hills, AL 35216. Phone: (205) 823-9646. E-mail the editorial department at editorial@otmj.com. E-mail our advertising department at ads@otmj.com. Find us on the Web at otmj.com. Copyright 2010 Over The Mountain Journal, Inc. All rights reserved. The Journal is not responsible for return of photos, copy and other unsolicited materials submitted. To have materials returned, please specify when submitting and provide a stamped, self-addressed envelope. All materials submitted are subject to editorial review and may be edited or declined without notification.
Murphy Airlines
arold and I spent a lot of time traveling last year. The destinations were wonderful. The journeys, not so much. Too many hours shoulder-to-shoulder with people in airports, too many seat backs and tray tables shoved into our laps midflight, too many colorful Susan Murphy phrases mumbled as we struggled to negotiate ticket counters and security lines. It didn’t have to be that way. With a few simple changes, every single passenger could have been, if not floating on cloud nine, at least less likely to go Jet Blue and bail out the emergency slide exit yelling, “So long, suckers!” If I had my own airline, the smiles would start when you bought your ticket. Every ticket would be the same price, no matter when or where you made the purchase. No more secret websites, no pay-nowpray-you-don’t-have-to-cancel-later lockdown fares. There wouldn’t be any luggage handling fees, either, but here’s the kicker: You would be required to check every bag bigger than a briefcase. No exceptions. Security procedures will be security procedures, and there’s nothing even a smiley face airline can do about that, but once you reached the Murphy Air gate area, the pleasantries would resume. I would provide chairs for every single person booked on the flight and a set of restrooms designated for that gate alone that would be hourly sanitized for your protection. The planes would be sanitized, too, wiped clean between every flight. When it was time to board, passengers would embark in a logical, orderly fashion, back seats first, front seats last. Folks who had trouble walking would be seated up front, followed directly by people who had to make flight connections. There would be rows for those who felt like chatting and rows for people who wanted to be left alone,
sleepers at the windows and fidgety people on the aisles. Families with small children would have their own section where we’d serve up juice boxes and Disney movies. If a baby started to cry, the designated flight attendant would rush over with a bottle of warm milk and say, “Bless his heart, he’s hungry/tired/a little scared,” and everyone around her would say, “ahhh.” Before the flight took off, passengers would be instructed to stand up and introduce themselves to the people around them, a gesture that would make people less likely to shove their seats back into their new friend’s knees. In the background, the PA system could play something like “We Are the World, We Are the Children” or “Let There Be Peace on Earth” to help matters along. With everyone in a positive mood, the plane would lift off with our happy, well-compensated pilots at the helm. Flight attendants would be happy, too, because they wouldn’t have to schlep down the aisles with the drink cart. Passengers would already have their drinks and snacks in their hands, pre-selected when they purchased their tickets and handed out in cute little Murphy Airline bags when they boarded. While passengers enjoyed their Coke/cranberry juice/double Jack Daniels, they could watch a video from the list of Murphy Airlines approved entertainment. Only happy, uplifting programming would be allowed, no shock jocks or political pundits, no car crashes or serial killer thrillers. Happy, people. Think happy. To insure future happiness, Murphy Airlines would have its own Do Not Fly list. Passengers who proved themselves rude or unruly would not be invited back, even if they were Gold Card Ultimate Platinum frequent fliers. When we touched down at our destination (on time), passengers would be handed a Murphy Airline Tootsie Pop, a little something to keep their spirits up until they arrived in baggage claim, where their luggage would be already waiting. Murphy Airlines, my pie in the sky dream. Wait a minute ... Murphy Air Moon Pies. ❖
OVER THE MOUNTAIN VIEWS
How will rising gas prices affect your summer travel plans?
“It probably really won’t. We go to North Carolina for three months and the gas prices are the same there.”
“The increased gas prices won’t affect airline costs, so it won’t change my travel plans. It’s not a vacation if you drive.”
Kathy Lemley Vestavia Hills
Eldric Fluker Hoover
“I don’t have a major commute to work so I save money there. It won’t affect my travels. I’m a beach person.” Emily Arnold Mountain Brook
“I’m afraid to drive my unreliable car. I hitch a ride anyways.” Virginia Alverson Mountain Brook