Irma Mali and Nika Mali at the Kiehl's Chrismas Celebration in Wicklow Street
has got far more interesting this year with the opening in Dublin and Cork of several pirate platforms. Talking of pirates, the Boat That Rocked’s Irish roots are explored fully by Paul Rusling in the Radio Caroline Bible, a 500-page brick of a book, which explains how Ronan O’Rahilly kitted out the original Caroline in Greenore, Co. Meath in the 1960s. Two of the DJs who made a big splash on
Sonya Lennon and Evie Smith at The Marker Hotel’s Christmas Tree event
Caroline, Robbie Dale and Chris Carey, were later responsible for kickstarting Ireland’s superpirate era with their respective stations, Sunshine Radio and Radio Nova whose names were later purloined by the two licensed broadcasters currently on-air in Dublin. With cameo appearances from the likes of Status Quo, MC5, the Tonys Blackburn and Benn, and Marianne Faithfull, it’s a fascinating read, which can be ordered from
radiocarolinebible.com… The Phantom is deeply saddened to learn of the death of Peter Forde, a member of Limerick alt. rockers Vesta Varro who toured extensively from 2006-’08 and released an album, Exit Here, that was recorded in Windmill Lane with Richard Rainey at the helm. They were serious contenders but, such is the randomness of rock ‘n’ roll, the commercial breakthrough they deserved never came.
ASOMBROSO! THE MUNCHIES CELEBRATE THE END OF A DECADE OF ALMOST TRIUMPH The end of a decade. What a long strange trip it’s been for the Mighty Men of Hot Press Munchengladbach 1891! By 2010, it is fair to say, things had started to change at what had been dubbed “the Home Farm of Irish journalism.” The new owners of the Grand Old Club (the same as the old owners, but we’ll let that pass) had begun to invest heavily in what some of the British tabloids consistently referred to as “foreign talent.” A steady stream of Brazilian Internationals found their way to Hot Press. Similarly, a string of nifty dribblers from one part or another of North Africa, notably including Algeria, Libya and Tunisia. On the pitch, mind you, the results didn’t always match the quality of the ensuing performances. That frosty observation brings us to the first big issue with which a side that is committed to playing football in Ireland has to contend: the state of the pitches. Let us be kind and say just that the surfaces leave a little bit to be desired, what with the hills, dales, bumps, tufts and – in winter – large puddles that on occasion become full-blown lakes with which ball players have to contend here on Paddy’s green shamrock shore. As if that were not obstacle enough for a side that likes to roll the ball around, as on a snooker table, there is the second factor: referees! In general, the men-in-black are fine upstanding individuals, whose only desire is to get to the end of the 90 minutes with their eardrums intact, notwithstanding all the shouting, roaring and belly-aching that happens on the average pitch – and with even worse emanating from the sidelines, and the always packed terraces! But still! Irish referees have, it seems, often been schooled in the British way of looking at football – and occasionally, indeed, of treating
the aforementioned “foreigners”. On many occasions, then, over the past ten years, as a Moroccan, a Brazilian or a Mexican lay prone on the bedraggled turf, after a twofooted lunge had taken the legs from under him, the officials have been known to bellow the immortal phrase “Get up outta that.” And yet, there have been many memorable moments. Winning the Fair Play Cup in 2015. Samir Benkouiten nutmegging three opponents in a row. Daier Benites in his pomp holding off all-comers or skipping over tackles before planting the spherical orb in the back of the proverbial onion sack. A screamer from Axel Balvanera that rose straight and arrow-like, holding true all the way from his boot to where the net bulged dramatically in the top left-hand corner. And perhaps best of all, the move, on a terrible pitch in Brickfields, in a game against Oliver Bond, in which all ten outfield players touched the ball in a superbly worked passing movement which culminated in Joe Ejoku slamming the liathróid home mercilessly from the edge of the area. So magnificent was that goal that the legendary player manager of Hot Press Munchelgladbach 1891, Niall Stokes, said only one word at his customary post-match pressconference and it was this: “Asombroso!” It didn’t matter what the question was, the answer was the same: “Asombroso!” “What number jersey did you wear today?” the man from the Maily Dale asked. “Asombroso,” the Munchies main-man responded. ”What did you think of the performance of the referee,” the woman from the Grauniad enquired. “Asombroso,” the big No.10 said with a smile. “Pep Guardiola admitted today that he was copying your style,” the football correspondent
The MIghty Men of 2019
from the Irish Currat Bun said. “What would you like to say to him by way rebuke?” “Asombroso!” Shortly afterwards, an attempt was made to launch a new drink on the Irish market using the name that had been immediately popularised by the pronunciations of the Hot Press playermanager. Asombroso was sold in two-litre purple glass bottles and tasted like a cross between Poitín and Tequila. However, following an exchange of legal letters, a seven-figure settlement was agreed for the unauthorised use of the name Asombroso. The drink was then quietly removed from the market. “There wasn’t enough alcohol in it,” the wily midfield dynamo said. “To have allowed them to sell Asombroso in that form would have seriously damaged my brand profile.” How football has changed! With the 20192020 season in full swing, the Mighty Men have latterly been having a torrid time, with many superb victories interspersed with occasional shock defeats. But with 2020 just around the corner, it is indeed time to celebrate the wonderful footballing achievements of the past decade. A few bottles of Asombroso remain, which were put aside with precisely this moment in mind. “We are still alive,” the Munchies playermanager told the assembled reporters. “At least I think I am.” The season is young yet.