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March 6
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April 1
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50 | Ohio Cattleman | Expo Issue 2018
On the Edge of Common Sense By Baxter Black, DVM
Old Bulls If our wives had picked their husbands with the care we buy a bull There’d be a lot more bachelors on the street. We’d be bucked up in the willers with the other mossy horns Just waitin’ for a straggler still in heat. They would check us all as yearlin’s on the lookout for bad eyes And notice how we traveled in the rocks But thank goodness we weren’t cattle ‘cause a lot of us sneaked by Nearsighted, deaf and showin’ sickle hocks. If they’d marched us through the sale ring as she sat there in the crowd And studied us and read our pedigree Could she see we might get paunchy and the highest grade we got In heifer satisfaction was a ‘C’? Would it make her any difference if she knew we’d lose our teeth And slough our hair and let our toes grow long? Would her herd sire valuation be affected by the fact When we were born they used a come-along? And our famed yearlin’ libido she’d observed when we were young A’crackin’ horns and tearin’ up the ground Now occurred about as often as a paid bank holiday. Could she know then we’d all wind up unsound? ‘Course, we tell ourselves she’s lucky to have had a private bull For all these years, through all the ups and downs But, down deep each cowman’s thankful that he curled his lip just right Before she had more time to shop around. v www.baxterblack.com