DANCING BACKWARDS IN HIGH HEELS
139
men. And this also has to do with the cultural fact that when most people think of a leader, of what they consider a ‘real’ leader, they think of a man.” She relates this stereotype to other more basic perceptions about femininity and masculinity: “when my oldest son was 12 or 13 years old and started to look a little like a man, people asked him what he wanted to study or what he wanted to do. But when my daughter turned 12 it was totally different. She was extremely smart, but no one asked her that question. It annoyed me, it shouldn’t be like that, and that is still going on.” She is glad to see that many men are fighting for a change of mentality:“my son, who is a successful lawyer, was the first man in his company to ask for a day off every week to take care of his children, and it was difficult for him. At the company, they found his request very strange, because he has a wife, and other lawyers also have children but they work every day. I think this is a very important movement that men are starting. They do not have to be ashamed that they want to build a close relationship with their children and they don’t want their children to grow up without them. That will bring about change.” Before saying goodbye, when I asked for a recommendation for women who are fighting for their cause now, she highlighted that they must work to strengthen each other: “It is very important that women support each other. When a woman is in an influential position she should look out for other women.”