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fingers now. But if Edward did return with Jacob, that was it. I had to tell him to go away and never come back. Why was that so hard? So very much more difficult than saying goodbye to my other friends, to Angela, to Mike? Why did thathurt ? It wasn’t right. That shouldn’t be able to hurt me. I had what I wanted. I couldn’t have them both, because Jacob could not be just my friend. It was time to give up wishing for that. How ridiculously greedy could any one person be? I had to get over this irrational feeling that Jacob belonged in my life. He couldn’t belong with me, could not bemy Jacob, when I belonged to someone else. I walked slowly back to the little clearing, my feet dragging. When I broke into the open space, blinking against the sharp light, I threw one quick glance toward Seth — he hadn’t moved from his bed of pine needles — and then looked away, avoiding his eyes. I could feel that my hair was wild, twisted into clumps like Medusa’s snakes. I yanked through it with my fingers, and then gave up quickly. Who cared what I looked like, anyway? I grabbed the canteen hanging beside the tent door and shook it. It sloshed wetly, so I unscrewed the lid and took a swig to rinse my mouth with the ice water. There was food somewhere nearby, but I didn’t feel hungry enough to look for it. I started pacing across the bright little space, feeling Seth’s eyes on me the whole time. Because I wouldn’t look at him, in my head he became the boy again, rather than the gigantic wolf. So much like a younger Jacob. I wanted to ask Seth to bark or give some other sign if Jacob was coming back, but I stopped myself. It didn’t matter if Jacob came back. It might be easier if he didn’t. I wished I had some way to call Edward. Seth whined at that moment, and got to his feet. “What is it?” I asked him stupidly. He ignored me, trotting to the edge of the trees, and pointing his nose toward the west. He began whimpering. “Is it the others, Seth?” I demanded. “In the clearing?” He looked at me and yelped softly once, and then turned his nose alertly back to the west. His ears laid back and he whined again. Why was I such a fool? What was I thinking, sending Edward away? How was I supposed to know what was going on? I didn’t speak wolf. A cold trickle of fear began to ooze down my spine. What if the time had run out? What if Jacob and Edward got too close? What if Edward decided to join in the fight? The icy fear pooled in my stomach. What if Seth’s distress had nothing to do with the clearing, and his yelp had been a denial? What if Jacob and Edward were fighting with each other, far away somewhere in the forest? They wouldn’t do that, would they?