an online magazine. He is biking and swimming. He seems emphatically committed to his sobriety, but I have learned to check my optimism.
Though they have spoken on the telephone with Nic, Karen, Jasper, and Daisy have not seen him since the relapse. We keep trying to explain it to Jasper and Daisy. “He has a disease” doesn’t begin to comfort them. It’s a wholly unsatisfying, confusing explanation. From their perspective, the symptoms of a disease are things like coughing, fevers, or a sore throat. The closest they get to understanding is Jasper’s image of the devil and the angel competing for the real estate of Nic’s soul.
Regardless, Daisy and Jasper miss him. Karen and I are unwilling to let Nic visit us in Inverness. We need more time. Nic seems to understand. We are not ready to have him come home again—not after this last time. Not after the stolen checks, the car chase, the trauma of not knowing—imagining him in the trunk of a car driving east across the country.