Polo: A Family Affair

Photos by Shelly Marshall Schmidt Supplemental photos by Katie Roth

By Marianne Yost

Holding the Spare

Like a knight’s page, she stands at the ready, a lone sentinel waiting on the sideline, a tacked horse at her side. Her eyes focused on one player on the field, actively engaged in competitive battle in the middle of a scrum of mallet-wielding men, in what has been described as the most dangerous team game in sports — polo. She waits for a signal from the rider — just eye contact. But between them, even from 100 yards apart, that signal is understood, for this is an especially close relationship. Suddenly, the rider spins and flies to where she stands. As she holds both horses steady, the rider springs from the back of one horse to the other, pivots, and tears back into the teeth of battle, with a fresh mount under her. She calls out a few encouraging words to the rider as she gallops away — as only a mother can do. For it was her 15-year old daughter, young polo phenomenon, Hope Arellano, sprinting back into the battle — and she, Meghan Arellano, was on the sidelines, “Holding her Spare”.

Much has been written about parents who inhabit the back stages or sidelines of their children’s endeavors, sometimes pushing, but more often supporting their children in their pursuits. “Helicopter Parents,” “Tiger Moms,” “Stage Moms,” and “Soccer Dads” are the terms that come to mind. But in Aiken, “Polo Parents” are in a class of their own, for the complexity of the sport demands a level of parental support that is significantly more than a trip to the sporting goods store to buy a mouth guard, shin pads, and spikes. Unlike other sports, polo is also a lifestyle.

for a son or daughter to play competitive polo and how do families deal with the challenges?

For starters, having polo players in your family can give you a leg up, but not necessarily. Hope Arellano comes from three generations of polo with both grandfathers being respected players. Her father, Julio, a former 9-goal handicap and one of the top ranked American pros in the country, is now a respected coach. Hope and her brothers, Agustin and Lucas, grew up playing polo at an early age, even to the chagrin of their parents. There was a time when Hope’s parents desperately tried to get her interested in playing another sport, tennis. But tennis didn’t “take”. Polo was the only thing Hope wanted to play and play she has. Last winter, the stellar quality of Hope’s play earned her an invitation to play high goal polo on the most important polo field in the country — Field One at International Polo Club in Wellington, Florida.

New to the Sport

The Leitner family knew nothing about polo when their horse-crazed, twin daughters Reagan and Robyn won the Extreme Mustang Makeover competition in barrel racing (after watching YouTube videos to teach themselves). A visit to a polo match at Aiken’s Whitney Field would spark the twins’ interest in the sport and change the family’s life going forward. The fearless twins, though tiny in stature, would become a force to be reckoned with on the polo field, fiercely playing against men twice their size, and four times their age.

Though they had no polo experience, their newly discovered passion for the sport — and their parents’ enthusiastic support — was recognized by the local Polo Parent community, where they were embraced. Jennifer Leitner, the twin’s mother, recalls the first year. “Everyone wanted to help!” Hearing they were playing at home on their Mustangs with broomsticks and beach balls, Gabriel Crespo (Aiken polo pro and parent) gave the girls polo mallets. “Tiger (Aiken Youth polo organizer Tiger Kneece) got them started slowly building their skills and confidence,” Jennifer said.

Sacrifice

Another young polo player whose family had no background in polo and learned the ropes in Aiken is Jack Whitman. Early on, Jack’s prodigious natural talent was recognized by Aiken-based, young player coach, Kylie Sheehan, and he

was later mentored by polo pro Pelon Escapite. In support of him, Jack’s parents Keith and Michelle have organized their lives to allow their talented equestrian children (Jack’s sister shows horses) to succeed and develop at the top levels of play by adopting the nomadic equestrian lifestyle, renting seasonal homes where their children are playing or showing. The Whitmans’ investment in supporting their son’s passion has paid off. Last winter, at 16 years old, Jack Whitman played on the fabled Field One at International Polo Club in the prestigious, high goal C.V. Whitney Cup with his heroes, the best players in the world. Jack scored the winning goal in overtime to give his team the victory.

Clearly, Aiken has become a hot house of youth polo — and in turn, a hub of Polo Parenting.

Tiger Kneece, Coach of Aiken Youth Polo, has developed several strong youth polo programs, both at the collegiate level and younger, that are constantly bringing new young players — and their parents into the sport. Tiger was born and raised in Aiken and was once a young American phenomenon in the sport with a 7-goal handicap. He now has a polo playing daughter, Summer, along with four other daughters. He and his wife Susie have been on both sides of the equation and actively help parents understand the commitment that it takes to make polo a family affair. More young players are on the polo fields in Aiken than ever before, and the new lighted arena at New Bridge Polo & Country Club has become a hub of the action.

An Uncommon Lifestyle

Not all Polo Parents’ kids play polo. At the higher levels of competition, polo is nomadic, with the USPA tournament schedules moving regionally with the seasons. In summer, play moves to cooler locales in horsey enclaves such as New York, Michigan and Wyoming. In fall and spring, it comes to Aiken, and winter sees it returning to Florida. The polo professionals and their families who live this lifestyle adjust in different ways to the positives and shortcomings of this uncommon life.

The parents of three young boys, Tessa Callaghan Lord and Del Walton (Del is the son of polo pro Rob Walton) have made unique adjustments to their “here and there” life.

Tessa said, “The sign-up time for all the summer team sports are booked up by the time we get back from Florida, so I got them into something they can still do and enjoy on their own.” Her boys take golf lessons three times a week at a course in Aiken. “They all can ride but we are not pushing them into polo,” she said.

Blessings

What’s the return on the sacrifice and effort of being a Polo Parent? Susie Kneece captured it in one elegant word — “Blessings!” she said. “Look at what we get to do. We work with families, kids, and beautiful horses. We spend our time outdoors every day. We are so blessed.”■

What VALUES did parents say are important for polo to be a “Family Affair?”

Commitment

“Our kids knew, if you own a horse, you had to ride it, take care of it and love it. If you chose polo — it’s a commitment. You have to work and take care of that horse.” ~ Meghan Arellano

Determination

“We have always said, it doesn’t matter if you win or lose. What matters is that you give it your best.” ~ Meghan Arellano

Support

“That’s why I hold Hope’s spare. So she knows I’m there. I’m right there for her.” ~ Meghan Arellano

Preparation

“And last and certainly not least is preparation. Preparation is EVERTHING. Waking up early, making the horse list, eating well, and if there is a morning game, having a good breakfast of eggs and bacon.” ~ Meghan Arellano

Dedication

“My whole family had a large learning curve ahead when the girls started playing polo, and we all had to be committed to ‘learning the ropes’ together.” ~ Jennifer Leitner

Adaptability

“Robyn and Reagan needed to adapt their skills as riders, from being barrel racers to polo players.” ~ Jennifer Leitner

Attitude

“If you aren’t going to try to win, there’s no point in doing it. And lastly, but certainly not least, it’s got to be fun!” ~ Larry Leitner