Their bedroom had always been on the main floor, but since they’d been gone, my work projects had spread out to the rest of the house in towering stacks of paper and boxes. That’s a bad idea for people who can’t see well in the dark. To avoid creating obstacles for them, I created a little office for myself on the second level where I work during the day, which keeps the main level free of my clutter. In the kitchen, we’ve modernized what we could with a vast array of cooking utensils and gadgets, including electric can openers, blenders, a Keurig coffee maker, and an assortment of meat stirrers and spatulas. We’re planning to purchase a new set of cookware soon too, pots, pans, and skillets that are durable yet lightweight for easy lifting. The oven has a selfcleaning feature, and the refrigerator is wide and well-lit. We’ve also replaced most of the windows in the house, which help keep the house warm in winter and cool in summer. Plus, they keep the dust out during the harvest months. Less dust and pollen means fewer allergy flare ups, and that usually means fewer medications
Eventual projects
This house is about 3,200 square feet, and there is one—count ‘em, one— bathroom. It has a shower, but if you aren’t claustrophobic before you go in, you will be when you come out. We’ve managed it for 23 years, but when I say a second bathroom is at the top of the list for our remodeling projects, now you know why. But we can’t just put in a bathroom wherever we want it. It will be for my parents’ later years, and that means it must be on the main floor. It also needs rails, wide doors, and a walk-in bathtub. Part of adding a second bathroom means a whole-house plumbing renovation. The house’s current plumbing solution is cobbled together with differing pipe sizes and jerryrigged draining systems. Once we have
new plumbing in the house, the list of planned projects expands rapidly. Also on the list of future projects to ensure my parents’ safety: ffNew garage building that stands closer to the house; ffNew laundry area, potentially with a stacked washer/dryer unit to save space; ffDishwasher and garbage disposal installation; ffEasy-to-open kitchen cabinets; ffContinued replacement of existing home windows; and ffHeating/Air conditioning on the second floor. Even so, there is only so much renovation you can do to a 100-yearold house. No matter how much we alter it, the house will still be 3,200-square-feet of worn hardwood flooring, brown recluses, and lath-andplaster dust. None of those are good options for an aging couple. For that reason, our eventual goal is to build a little cabin on the lawn across from the Big House. A house will cut down on the dust levels and provide new, updated appliances. We would also want an easily accessible safe room, rather than a basement. A smaller, one-level home will be easier for mom to keep clean on her own, which is an important aspect of her feeling independent. Yet I’ll still be just a few hundred feet away to help when I’m needed. In preparation for this project, we’ve started researching different pre-fab home websites. Our preference would be to select a local vendor, mainly because in our experience only Kansas builders can build for Kansas weather, but not many pre-fab builders are local. That being said, we are currently researching bids for the construction of a new garage, and if that project is successful, building a small house from the ground up may be a potential option. We’ve also had to research zoning restrictions within our county, which we’ve discovered may make this
venture a bit more complicated. Fortunately, this project is still many years out as my parents enjoy relatively good health and mobility.
Change your mindset
Thoughtful planning is important for your aging parents’ future, but more important than planning is the adjustment of your own mindset. Your personal awareness is key. Pay attention to what your parents are doing. If they’re coming home from the grocery store, help them carry bags. If the weather is icy, meet them at the door to help them inside. If heavy objects in the house need to be moved, be available to lend a hand. Sure, you can wait for them to ask, but it’s better if you take the initiative. Don’t make them come to you for help. Be there to help anyway. Then it’s not charity; it’s teamwork. Your family is a team that’s simply working together, and there’s no need to feel shame or guilt in asking for help. Instead, there’s just friendship and grace and a whole lot of laughter. KCL is a writer in living in Kansas, with published works in both fiction and drama. The Williams’ are members of Sedgwick Electric Cooperative.
AMY WILLIAMS
Amy Williams and her parents, Daryl and Pat, in the claustrophobia-inducing bathroom.
APRIL 2017
KANSAS COUNTRY LIVING
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