Living In
ISOLATION by Jean Eisenmann | photo courtesy of Jean Eisenmann
W
e Texans are a social bunch. It’s in our DNA to mix and mingle, gather and party, and use any excuse to have a good ol’ time...together. When differing circumstances – from measles to a veritable pandemic – arise that force us to isolate ourselves from socialization we don’t fare too well. I’m just one example.
to do things to myself that I haven’t done
since college. Like pedicures. You thought I was going to say something else, didn’t you?
My fingernails have whittled down to
uneven stubs, so I have a better chance
of picking up a paper clip with my teeth. Now I can relate to how a declawed cat
feels. So I visited the nail care section of a drug store, thinking I would try some
press-on nails that were already painted
and ready for some paper clip action. The shelves were nearly empty, so everybody
had the same brilliant idea that they stole from me. I had my choice between devil red or silver with each nail covered in
rhinestones. I decided that I really don’t have an immediate need to use paper clips just now, but I’m thinking about adopting a cat. Toilet Paper
Shopping Before the Covid-19 pandemic
Aisle 15), and all those foot-long loaves of
found an excuse to shop. Nearly every day.
soft and warm within – made me salivate.
wiped. Counting out squares of the stuff
my mouth. It’ll come out in the wash.
And then there’s the tug of war game,
I was one of those women who always
Just the veritable smell of a retail store
was uplifting; a mix of shoe suede, purse
leather, fabrics, and female bonding. Why can’t they come out with an air freshener comparable to that? Who needs that
vanilla cookie scent? ...Okay, there’s room for both. The female bonding between
shoppers over a pair of ‘new arrival’ shoes was my nourishment. Now I’m starving. Speaking of starving....
tanned bread – crusty on the outside but
The toilet tissue shortage has left me
Thank goodness for the bandana covering
has become a pastime. It used to be golf.
Leaving the House I placed my keys in a bell jar by the front door to keep them from getting dusty.
Sometimes I get into my car that’s parked in the garage, sit in the driver’s seat and just start the engine. Vroom Vroom,
I’m tooling along, deciding in my mind
Eating In
where to stop first. A grocery store is not
I don’t know about you, but during these
of those lately. It’s so low on my travel
days of isolation I’m eating my feelings. Did you know there are 25 varieties of Oreos? I’m on number 11. For three
years I had all but given up bread, rice and potatoes and ate pretty healthy.
A pandemic hits and I’m on a feeding
frenzy. Normally I’m not a dessert lover, but apparently during social isolation I
become a sweets Floozie. Good to know.
foremost on my list. I’ve seen enough
agenda that it’s listed after Blockbuster, and they’re not even around anymore.
when the family is down to one role and the house has three bathrooms. Can I
count that as a workout? I fantasize about the emotional reunion once my arms
wrap around my chosen TP. Like the blue
bears in the commercial I envision myself caressing the roll, sighing contentedly
over the softness as soothing music plays. Is this the same stuff I used to throw onto the back seat, tear open once home
and shove into the cabinet under the bathroom sink?
The other day, while in the middle of my
This isolation period will pass, and
this same game. With my father’s car when
learned. I will continue to be high
“travels,” I remembered that I used to play
hopefully we all will emerge with lessons
I was 12!
maintenance, shop ‘til I drop, love (but
Physical Maintenance
life’s pleasures is dining out with friends.
refrain from) junk food, and believe one of
Okay, some say I’m high maintenance.
But the new part of me will have a much
on your body either plucked, trimmed,
smallest things that I used to take for
every other week? These days I’m forced
longer covet toilet paper.
The key items visible from all directions
What’s wrong with having something
deeper sense of gratitude for even the
friends from Frito-Lay missed me all these
colored, glued, waxed or polished about
granted...with one exception. I will no
in a grocery store are junk food. My old
years (I swear I heard them call me from 6 | ARGYLE LIVING
| May 2020
www.ArgyleLivingMagazine.com
