The CYHSB Steak Dinner Official Review

By Shayna Kahane ('25)

ith the Gala Dinner drawing near in just a little over two weeks, I fondly think back to the lovely evening of Sunday, January 29, where I enjoyed the CYHSB’s 28th Annual Steak Dinner. I must say, I was pleasantly surprised. As I was walking in, the wonderful aroma of the gourmet dishes being prepared in the kitchen was almost too much to handle. Being guided to my seat by smiling, friendly waiters de fi nitely contributed to the overall warm environment. The place settings were done in the most unique manner I have ever seen. I loved the mixture of colors and textures, paper and plastic, canned and organic, all contributing to the evening’s very special atmosphere.

The first course, pineapple, was a delicious, fresh beginning to an evening of amazing food. The fresh fruity flavor reminded me of my favorite Dole fruit snacks, and the perfectly achieved ratio of pineapple blocks to pineapple juice was mind boggling. The waiters passing around the scrumptious homemade hors d'oeuvres were incredibly kind and willing to help all of the guests. The salad that followed the pineapple delicacy was just as delicious. Fresh lettuce, sliced carrots, and spectacular Italian dressing blessed my taste buds with each bite. The sprinkling of fresh cucumbers and tomatoes were my personal favorites.

The Dvar Torah by Mister Yitzchak Rubin that followed was extremely inspiring, life changing even. I learned so much about the Kashrut of meat that I never even knew was so applicable! I also appreciated the subtle jokes and intended puns, making it just that much more enjoyable to listen to. I feel almost fluent in the anatomy of a cow that now, I could practically be a butcher. I must say, that is going to be hard to top, and the GMSGers definitely have our work cut out for us.

Following the simply enthralling Dvar Torah, I was served an amazing main course. The sharply dressed, smiling waiters once again appeared to serve another course. I was addressed by name and handed the meal that I chose beforehand, treating each guest as no less than a princess. The steak was cooked to a rare perfection, thanks to head chef Gavi Ramsey, and the portion sizes were extremely generous. The alternative options of chicken, fish, or veggie steak looked just as scrumptious. The full potato was an innovative treat, and I loved the creativity of it. It was unexpected, but delicious nonetheless. The green beans were cooked to a moist, earthy, delicious excellence. As Mrs. Branson remarked, “The food was cooked, which was nice, and the waiters were very attentive. They did a lot better than I thought.”

Ethan Vanderwalde followed with an outstanding performance on the piano. His talents are unmatched, and

Continued on page 5

I am blown away by how he managed to master the music and help with the dinner at the same time. The crowd watched in awe as Vanderwalde serenaded them. The boys’ abilities to multitask and time manage amazed me almost as much as the dinner itself. The entertainment video which followed had me in stitches. Who knew the boys could be so funny? It was evident how much thought, time, and effort went into the videos. I could hear the audience erupting into laughter all around me, and I knew they felt the same. The videos were a very fun, unique way to thank the sponsors of the evening, and I am sure they appreciated them greatly. In fact, they were so funny, the half hour was not quite enough. I would have sat through another hour easily.

To top off the evening, the video for the surprise honoree was out of this world. The boys did such a good job keeping it a secret, I could see the look of surprise on Rabbi Safier’s face when they called his name. His excitement radiated through his pores as he took the time to personally thank each student for this unbelievable honor. The thoughtful words spoken about Rabbi Safier were incredibly heartfelt and kind, showing how much the boys felt he truly deserved this honor. Rabbi Safier just couldn’t stop smiling and it was so heartwarming to witness.

The evening ended off with a truly scrumptious dessert reminiscent of sorbet from Ben and Jerry’s Gourmet Ice Cream and Catering Service. The cool, sweet flavor complemented the steak just beautifully and was a perfect choice for dessert. Brooke Sanderson (‘25) noted that this was actually her favorite part of the evening!

All in all, I must say that the CYHSB Steak Dinner was an experience unlike any other. I was extremely impressed and applaud the entire CYHSB for their hard work making the dinner as extraordinary as it was. We all took note of how much went into making it happen, and it was truly a remarkable experience. With the GMSG Gala Dinner approaching quickly, I only hope we can live up to the superhuman expectation the Yeshiva boys have set for the community and the high standard of high school dinners. With that, I invite everyone to join us on March 20 for the GMSG Gala Dinner! Mark your calendars!

Football has quickly become one of the world’s favorite sports, in which two teams of 11 players try to maneuver the ball across the field by carrying or passing to another teammate. The object of football is to score more points than your opponents in the allotted time. To do this, teams must move the ball down in phases of play before eventually getting the ball to the ‘end zone’ for a touchdown.

Recently, the NFL (National Football League) has put out new rules to allow for safer and more enjoyable play, starting with a strict no violence policy. In the past, the dominant way to stop the opposing team was by tackling them. Officials have decided that not only is this far too dangerous, but it is also a large invasion of personal space. To solve this issue, players are now required to run with princess wands and GENTLY tap the head of the opposing player. The player who is tapped must do a dance involving at least seven turns and four cartwheels, after which they kindly hand over the football to the other team and curtsy to show no hard feelings.

The next rule shared to the public was that players could no longer run with the ball. Running is a very dangerous activity which could cause slipping, muscle strains, and worst of all: grass stains. To counteract this threat, signs have been placed all along the fields indicating the speed limit. Players may not walk any faster than 1 mile an hour, and if they exceed the speed limit, they are placed into a circus cannon and launched out of the open roof of the stadium.

Coaches have also found it highly offensive and damaging to a player’s self esteem to award points to the team who has scored the touchdown. To solve this, points are being removed from the game to ensure each player leaves as happy as they started, and both teams exit the stadium as humble as they came in. It is understood that a game without goals leaves for no motivation so instead, players who make it to the endzone are rewarded with a marshmallow and a solid pat on the back, while their personal theme song plays from the arena speakers. Due to the fairness of the game, no team can win, but the team with the most marshmallows is given the privilege of making delicious rice crispy treats together after the game. But don’t worry! They are required to share with the other team.

Now, the most important change to the most important part of the game: HALFTIME! After the second quarter, people typically all get up to get more food, go to the bathroom and sometimes take part in whatever weird entertaining things are going on in the field. With football’s new rules, all football fans are shackled to their seats and forced to take part in an 80 minute orchestrated performance composed by a deaf ostridge. You may think this is unenjoyable, but it all just contributes to the experience of going to a professional football game. As the famous saying goes, “it’s not football without an 80 minute orchestrated performance composed by a deaf ostridge.”

With these new rules, you may be concerned about the Superbowl. Luckily, this was the first thought on every player's mind. To continue the tradition of the annual Superbowl, the team which has consumed the most rice krispies will face the CYHSB in a match to the death. Not real death, of course. That would go against the no violence policy. Rather death of their pride because the winner will partake in an all you can eat cereal bar, and this time, they will not have to share. The title itself “Superbowl” may be considered offensive for those who have a severe phobia of bowls so to accommodate, it is being renamed “the Superball,” with the winning team receiving the title of “Rice Krispy Kings.”

Now that you are properly informed of these new rules, we look forward to seeing a record breaking amount of spectators at our next match.

Regards,

The National Football League Officials