Ruach

It is a Hebrew word that means breath, wind, an unseen force of life or spirit. In the bible, we see the Ruach of God hovering over the not yet formed world, and throughout the narrative of humanity, it is the Ruach of God that inspires and stirs people into action. And it is this divine Ruach—which created me, breathed life into my existence— it is this gentle breeze of God that undoes me, causing me to pause in all of my unhealthy tendencies. The Spirit of God calls me by name. She catches my attention. Even as Anxiety jealously tries to guard me from her, the Ruach of God approaches me directly, unafraid to cut into our chaotic dance. She gazes into the depths of my soul, the once sacred space now covered in piles of calendar invites, project deadlines, stray musical notes, balls of cat hair, memories of failed recitals, years worth of service orders, projections of disapproving family and colleagues, and a marathon of restless nights. I feel utterly naked in front of her and frighteningly seen. Anxiety, upset that she has lost my attention, retreats into the background, sulking. And the Spirit of God, now at the center of my universe, cradles my face.

covers from head to toe in her divine release: a rush wind to be continued...

It is the Ruach’s gentle reminder that she is always with me. Whenever I feel Anxiety creeping around the corner, I recall the force of life residing within my soul, and I take a moment to breathe. I am growing to be less afraid of her as the days go by. I focus on the air flling my chest cavity, and take note of how long it takes to blow it all out. I feel the gravitational pull downwards in the depths of my stomach; I feel the solid ground underneath my feet. I am anchored. I am centered. I am empowered. I’m taking a deep breath in now…. letting it out. In again, out again. The Spirit of God is enjoying the breeze that gently cloaks us both. I rest in her embrace. In again, out again. In again, out again.