Bubba knows everyone

Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."

Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Bubba how about Tom Cruise?"

"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it. "

So Bubba and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knocked on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, "Bubba! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"

Although impressed, Bubba's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Bubba that he thinks Bubba's knowing Cruise was just lucky.

"No, no, just name anyone else," Bubba says.

"President Clinton," his boss quickly retorts.

"Yes," Bubba says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington."

And off they go. At the White House, Clinton spots Bubba on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Bubba, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."

Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White house grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba, who again implores him to name anyone else.

"The Pope," his boss replies.

"Sure!" says Bubba. "My folks are from Poland, and I've known the Pope a long time."

So off they fly to Rome. Bubba and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Bubba says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."

And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony.

But by the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his boss' side, Bubba asks him, "What happened?"

His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, "Who's that on the balcony with Bubba?"

Across

1 Foolhardy (4)

3 Surround (8)

9 Capital of Kenya (7)

10 Mistake resulting from inattention (5)

11 Classical language (5)

12 US island state (6)

14 Crane-fly (5-4-4)

17 One taking part in game (6)

19 Perhaps (5)

22 Reasoned thinking (5)

23 Japanese art of paper folding (7)

24 Height, elevation (8)

25 Stick around (4)

Down

1 Turncoat (8)

2 River of Paris (5)

4 Locality (13)

5 Relative by marriage (23)

6 Prisoner (7)

7 At all times (4)

8 Beast of burden (6)

Across

1 A drink in the shade (6)

4 Raft I'd set loose might be this (6)

8 Dud Moore, the famous lover? (5)

9 Again let loose (7)

10 Card game making some American a star (7)

11 1 across encountered in front of empty houses (5)

12 Put a wreath on a river in the country (9)

17 Capital person settled in manor (5)

19 Write about air on a planet (7)

21 Turning 13 down? That's swell (7)

22 True Conservatives? (5)

23 Nigel's getting about, being unmarried (6)

24 Offer for nurse? (6)

Down

1 Neat tree (6)

2 Huge people in rebuilt semi (7)

3 Religious images one studies (5)

5 Between two girls, left in a quandary (7)

13 Harshness of manner (8)

15 Delectation (7)

16 Opening ploy

6 Unsuitable order for paint (5)

7 Religious belief set him off (6)

9 Change in order to get back to the stove (9)

13 This officer is not particular (7)

14 Given narcotics, dealers start getting tough (7)

15 Underwear made from artificial fibres? (6)

16 Superior gambler (6)

18 Fruit swallowed by some Londoners (5)

20 Super sort of money bag (5)

(Property belonged to Banjo’s grandparents) which includes

HIGH TEA, homestead and LIVE ENTERTAINMENT

Cost $30 per person. Cash or card.

For further information contact Elizabeth Griffin 63611920

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UNITING that work ! QUICK CROSSWORD CRYPTIC CROSSWORD

CHURCH NOTICES

Sunday 5 FEBRUARY

CHURCH THANK

Molong Assemblies of God Contact Ps Deon Stapelberg Ph 0498 659 703 For meeting details

Claim the date – 2022 Send your 2023 dates to molongexpress@bigpond.net.au

February

2 Molong Men’s Shed meets April

6 Molong Men’s Shed meets May

4 Molong Men’s Shed meets June

1 Molong Men’s Shed meets July

6 Molong Men’s Shed meets August

($37.50 per year) ONLY $0.75

Magpies Too Strong For Millthorpe

Molong Magpies recorded their first win of the season with a big win over Millthorpe at Molong.

Batting first the home side recorded a big total of 5 for 194 after their 40 overs. It wasn’t all easy going though, Millthorpe’s opening bowlers Pat Tree and Aidan Lefevre bowled very well with not much luck with near misses and poor fielding letting them down. However opening batsman Troy Barrett (40) and the hack Mark Niederle (47) laid the platform for Magpies. First drop Chris ( I can’t bat in a helmet) Beatty (56no), Andrew Drady (28) and Ben Brown (12no) all contributed to the big total.

Adian Lefevre the standout Millthorpe bowler with 2 for 18 off his 10 overs. Tom Card 2 for 39 also bowled very well.

In reply Millthorpe struggled to score runs quickly and wickets fell at a constant rate. Only D Yates (10) and Jarrod Lefevre (14) reached double figures for the visitors.

Mark Niederle capped off a wonderful match taking 5 for 17 from 10 overs whilst the underrated Dylan Wilson took 4 for 23 off 9 overs. A dropped catch late in the match stealing a five wicket haul for him.

Strong win for Magpies after last week’s debacle. Millthorpe were let down by their fielding. However have a strong team on paper and will no doubt improve in the weeks ahead.

ASSOCIATION UPDATE ON Dr ROSS OVAL AND T20 FINAL.

Last Monday the Association was invited to a follow up meeting along with other users of the Dr Ross Memorial Oval (Rec) with Cabonne Council. As a result of this meeting it has been confirmed that no cricket will be played at the Rec for the 2022/23 season.

This is due to damage caused to the ground

Molong Golf

Molong Sunday Golf Notes

A muggy Sunday morning at the Royal Molong Golf Course saw twelve players in attendance for a (hands up who knows what sort of event we played), of course, a twelve hole two person ambrose event. We played the back nine holes and played holes ten, eleven and twelve twice. This type of event is good for those who are not sure if they want to join us for golf because you have a partner to help you so if you play a bad shot then you hope your partner will play a good shot. Doesn’t always work out but it’s good fun.

The winners were, and I don’t say this with great certainty because Matty E. did the addition, subtraction, division etc, Bro and Bruno. Bro reckoned Bruno played the better golf and won it for them, Bruno argued the other way.

The runners-up were Troy and Mick P. Mick, who according to an Australia Day photo in the Central Western Daily is now Mick Campbell, was happy not having to play hole seven where he consistently loses a golf ball over the fence. He lost no golf balls this week.

Ged brought his dog to golf this week and it immediately decided it liked golf balls and tried and its infrastructure during the recent flooding at Molong and ongoing issues post flood. In particular major damage has been caused to the picket fence along with ground / soil issues on the western side that need significant repair and top dressing.

On a separate note the Twenty20 Final will be played at Redmond Oval, Millthorpe on Saturday 11 February 2pm. The match will be played between Millthorpe/Lyndhurst V Molong Magpies /Country. A badged umpire will be appointed for this match.

Both Cudal and Canowindra will have the weekend off.

Premiers Cudal Defeat Canowindra

Premiers Cudal have recorded their first win in defence of their title defeating Canowindra at Canowindra.

The visitor’s batted first and scored 9 for 155. J Vero top scored with 44. Jason Ryan 39 and the ever reliable Andrew Smith 25 also batted well. Bowling for the home side Nick Traves 2 for 30 and W Baba with the great figures of 4 for 10 from 8 overs were the best of the Canowindra attack.

Craig Carpenter’s retirement lasted just one match as he reappeared to open the batting for the home team. He made a handy 23 before being dismissed. Brendan Traves continued his form from the previous week top scoring for Canowindra with 55. W Babar capped off a good match scoring 21 late in the innings but it wasnt enough with the home side falling short all out for 139.

Jason Ryan consolidated a fine match taking 3 for 33. Luke Wood 4 for 33 bowled well and along with D Whittle with 2 for 3 were Cudal’s best.

to disappear with one after the first tee shots. It was sent home at the earliest opportunity.

Al has a self propelled golf buggy that he manoeuvres with a remote control. Whilst Ged was playing his drive off the eleventh Al had his buggy out in the middle of the fairway doing wheelies trying to distract Ged who’s tee shot ended up in the dam. Al protested his innocence, saying the buggy got out of control. Yeah, right.

Thanks to Bell for rissoles, sausages and onions for the bbq and to Ged for cooking.

And finally something to contemplate: The fact that there’s a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers.

If you think you are smarter than previous generations…. fifty years ago the owners manual of a car showed you how to adjust the valves. Today it warns you not to drink the contents of the battery.

Golf again on Sunday, 8.30am for 9am. All welcome.

We offer Auction Plus assessments on both sheep and cattle. Direct paddock sales, over the hook rates, Weekly stock sales in Carcoar (CTLX), Forbes, Dubbo & Wagga saleyards. Contact one of our Landmark Tablelands Livestock team.

Paul Glynn (Molong & surrounding districts)

– 0428

168 638

CTLX CATTLE 31 January

Numbers were back by 350 for a yarding of 895. It was a fair quality yarding with good numbers of young cattle to suit the feeders and processors though the quality of the feeder cattle was back. There were odd pens of young cattle suitable for the restockers and there was a fair selection of grown steers and heifers. There were just under 100 cows yarded. Young cattle to the trade were firm to 5c dearer with prime vealers selling to 420c/kg. Prime yearlings sold from 345c to 426c/kg. Feeder steers and heifers were 8c to 12c cheaper with quality a factor. Feeder steers sold from 340c to 429c while the feeder heifers sold from 330c to 408c/kg. Young cattle to the restockers were firm with the young steers selling from 355c to 474c while the young restocker heifers sold from 330c to 401c/kg. Grown steers and heifers were 8c dearer with the prime grown steers selling from 300c to 370c while the prime grown heifers sold from 326c to 363c/kg. Cows were firm with the 2 and 3 scores selling from 215c to 280c/kg. Prime heavy weight cows sold from 273c to 294c to average 286c/kg. Heavy bulls sold to 275c/kg.