Modern Aquarium

Page 31

"Famous Last Words..." A series by "The Undergravel Reporter"

"There's more than enough room in this tank for another pair; and besides, these are very peaceful fish, so I'm sure they'll get along with each other..." "O.K., so I'm almost out of plastic fish bags. I'll just use a single bag to bring these fish to the club auction. Anyway, what's the chances that a brand new bag will spring a leak?..." "The only opening in the cover of this tank is that small space for the airline tubing and the electrical cord for the heater. I certainly don't need to cover that opening. All my fish are too big to fit through a hole that small..." "It's only a scratch on the glass wall of the tank, and it's not even that deep. It won't cause any problems..."

ou know what those words are. Sometimes you've said them to another aquarist; sometimes you've said them to yourself. Those are the words that usually come just before you exclaim "Oh, *•&#*!!" How many of these "Famous Last Words" do you recognize?

Y

"This syphon is going so slowly that I have more than enough time to run into the next room for a net before the bucket fills up..." "I know that I paid a lot for this pair offish, but the person who put them in the club's auction says they are a mated pair, guaranteed to spawn..." "This glass lid should fit better than this on my tank. Maybe if I just push a little harder..." "Yeah, sure, I know she said these fish are jumpers, but they're in three inches of water in a twelve inch high bucket. I don't need to cover the bucket for the short time it is going to take for me to get the quarantine tank ready..." "I don't need to quarantine these fish at all. They came from another hobbyist in the club, and they were perfectly healthy in his tank..." "I can balance this open can of flake food on the edge of the tank while I reach over to close the lid. I've done this many times before and nothing will happen..." "I don't need to go through the time and effort to take out the rocks, wait until they dry off, silicone them together, and wait until the silicone cures. I can just stack the rocks in such a way that the fish won't be able to move them..." Modern Aquarium - Greater City A.S. (NY)

"If I fill the buckets right to the top, I can get the job of cleaning the tanks done quicker. I'm careful enough not to spill anything..." "I know exactly which fish I want to take to the show. Fortunately, it's always right out in front, begging for food, so I can wait until the last minute before netting it..." "These snails are guaranteed not to eat your plants..." "That canister filter has started to make some really strange noises. It probably only needs a change in filter media. I'm sure it can wait until I get back from the aquarium club meeting later tonight..." "I really need to plug in these airpumps, but there's no more outlets available. Heck, I can use a few extension cords. It won't do any harm..." "O.K., maybe this heater is a lot larger than this tank needs, but I don't have a small heater that I can use right now. So, I'll just set this big heater on low. I'm sure everything will be fine until I can get the right size heater for this tank..." AND, for the ultimate in "Famous Last Words": "Oh my gosh, there's water all over the floor! It must have been that darn canister filter. I know I should have installed a ground fault interrupter, but I didn't. And, I know that I probably should shut down the power at the circuit breaker box before pulling the electric plug while standing in an inch of water. But, I know what I'm doing..."

March 2004

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