46
FROM BURNT OUT TO FIRED UP
Although these protective mechanisms shield us from pain at the outset, they stop serving us in the long term (Wadsworth, 2015). It can be hard to take off the comfy sweatshirt (namely, our patterns of maladaptive emotional responses). This maladaptive emotional shield can prevent us from showing up as our full selves, resulting in a counterfeit representative of who we are.
Toxic Positivity Striving to develop a positive outlook and belief system should not eclipse or cause us to deny our inherent human emotions like grief, sadness, anger, shame, and disappointment. These emotions serve an important purpose in our self-expression as human beings, indicating when it is time to step back, observe ourselves with some authentic curiosity, and choose how we wish to proceed (Rodriguez, 2013). The insistence that people should always aim to “see the bright side” of their struggle is called toxic positivity. Toxic positivity refers to a mindset that seeks out only positive thoughts and rejects the existence of negative emotions and experiences. “Toxic positivity can be described as insincere positivity that leads to
©2022 by Solution Tree Press. All rights reserved.
It can be easy to subconsciously overgeneralize an extreme reaction as a one-sizefits-all approach when faced with stressful situations. In other words, we learn to avoid processing the pain of shame and corresponding sense of unworthiness by galvanizing ourselves against it in a way that corresponds to our flight, freeze, and fight responses. For example, conf lict can be tough to navigate for many of us. Assessment and reporting have the potential to cause conflict with students and parents, especially if a student is not meeting curricular expectations. When you know that your assessment will be met with aggression (such as an angry parent email or a student angrily confronting you in class), it might feel easier to avoid the conf lict by elevating the mark. Unfortunately, this approach is one way of fleeing from the stress of potential conflict. Instead of being honest, ethical, and transparent, we’ve avoided the conflict altogether, exemplifying a flight response. In the context of trauma, PTSD is not considered a mental illness but rather a psychological injury (Carrington, 2020). What’s significant and hopeful about understanding PTSD as an injury and not an illness is that even if we suffer the effects of PTSD as a result of lived trauma, we have the capacity through hard work and rehabilitation to overcome the negative effects of our trauma. We do not have to be shackled to and limited by our traumatic experiences forever. It is possible to become resilient after trauma, and much of our ability to bounce forward comes from the narratives we create as we process painful experiences.
