December 2019

Page 42

I knew this lady was going to be sticking around and that she would be playing a very important role in my children’s lives whether I liked it or not. Thankfully, I made the choice to like it. Photo courtesy of Pam Dusbabek / Heart of Life Photography

ended with “Select All” and “Delete.” By Mother’s Day morning in 2018, I had rewritten three chapters and, out of complete frustration, deleted every single word. Something wasn’t right.

It shouldn’t be this difficult. I knew I was missing something. But what? The more I thought about it, the more I realized that almost all of my proudest co-parenting moments involved Tina. My heart started racing. Maybe Tina and I should write this book together? How cool would it be to share our stories and struggles from both the mom and stepmom perspectives? But would she even consider it?

Partnering up

(Step)Mom: A Dual Memoir: How We Navigated Divorce, Remarriage & Co-Parenting With the Same Goal — Happy Children came out in May 2019. Request a free excerpt at gipfordmoms.com.

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December 2019 • mnparent.com

I could hardly believe that I was driving up my ex-husband’s driveway in hopes of talking his wife into co-authoring a book with me. I must be crazy. My emotions were on a rollercoaster. I was excited, but nervous, scared, but ready to face rejection. It was a beautiful, warm Mother’s Day afternoon, so we decided to sit outside and soak up the sun while we chatted. I pitched her the book idea and, without any bribery or arm-twisting, she willingly hopped on board. We proceeded to share stories and reflect on the past 13 years. It was the perfect ending to the best Mother’s Day ever.

In May 2019, we independently published our short-form story — available in paperback and on Kindle: (Step)Mom: A Dual Memoir: How We Navigated Divorce, Remarriage & Co-Parenting With the Same Goal — Happy Children. Rather than writing another “how-to” parenting book, we wanted to do something more authentic and entertaining. We took turns sharing stories, from the unique vantage points of a mom and a stepmom, on the trials and tribulations of raising kids between two families. Before the book, Tina and I had always gotten along. But I wouldn’t say we were BFFs by any means. We kept our social lives separate and we just didn’t speak as openly and honestly as we do now, post-book. Now, over a year later, my relationship with Shawn and Tina has grown even stronger. Writing the book is still at the top of my “best things I’ve ever done” list. Erin Gipford, a graphic designer and photographer, and Tina Gipford, a stay-athome mom and daycare operator, live in rural Wisconsin. Learn more about their book at gipfordmoms.com.


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