The FAMILY Magazine June 2012 by FAMILY Magazines of Michiana

COMPLIMENTARY • PRICELESS • FREE

M A G A Z I N E S

O F

M I C H I A N A

Playgroups

They’re Not Just for Kids

Sibling Rivalry

How to Stay Above the Fray and When to Intervene

Welcome Baby in Style! Decorating the Perfect Nursery

Planning a Great Family Reunion

June 2012

Serving: Granger • Mishawaka • Elkhart • South Bend • Goshen • Niles • Edwardsburg • Middlebury • Plymouth

Congratulations! To the talented March Coloring Winners.

Contributors Publisher & Editor-in-Chief:

Betsy Tavernier Betsy@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com EXECUTIVE Editor: Kerri Hagens Kerri@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com FAMILY MAGAZINES Advertising Account Manager: Jessica Marietta Jessica@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com FAMILY & LAKESIDE MAGAZINES Advertising Account Manager: Brianna Armato Brianna@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com Creative Director: Jena Bontrager Jena@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com GRAPHIC DESIGNER: Zuzanna Zmud Zuzanna@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com GRAPHIC DESIGN INTERN: Katie Brenneman Katie@MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

Lina – Age 9p Julia – Age 1 0 u Abbigail – Age 5 q

Fashion Editor: Kathy Friend Kathy@MMProd.com Medical Editor: S. Jesse Hsieh, M.D. Distribution Managers: Richard Cox – St. Joseph, Cass & Berrien Counties Wes Bontrager – Elkhart County Joe Dixon – St. Joseph County Michiana Family Magazines would love to hear from you! Please submit press releases, event information and inquiries to: Media@Michianafamilymagazine.com The FAMILY Magazines 1233 E. University Drive Granger, IN 46530 PH: 574.387.5420 (3261) • FX: 574.217.4700 www.michianafamilymagazine.com The FAMILY Magazines June 2012 Established in 2006. All rights reserved.

IN THE NEXT ISSUE:

Permission from the publisher is required for any reproduction or reprint of this publication.

Staycations & Vacations • All About Teens

If you would like your business and/or service to be included in the next issue, call The FAMILY Magazines at 574.293.FAM1 (3261) to reserve your space. Space is limited.

Volume 6: Number 6

www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

on the cover: The Ianello Family of Edwardsburg Photography: Classic Image Photography, Granger

The FAMILY Magazine is a proud member of PMA

2 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Read The FAMILY Magazines online each month! Go to www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com and flip the pages, cover-to-cover the organic and green way!

Please use the information compiled by Michiana Family Magazines for your research. Michiana Family Magazines recommends that parents and families interview each business or organization to make sure that it is safe and a good fit for your family. The information presented here and provided by Michiana Family Magazines is for informational purposes only and although every effort has been made to present accurate information, Michiana Family Magazines does not, in any way, accept responsibility for the accuracy of or consequences from the use of this information and/or for the businesses and organizations presented herein. We urge all parents and families to confirm any information given herein through additional research. The views and opinions expressed by the writers, event organizers and advertisers do not necessarily represent those of Michiana Family Magazines LLC, its officers, editors, staff or contributors.

The FAMILY Magazine: Live Your Best:

7 Find the Hidden Acorn 8 The FAMILY Month Calendar

A very special thank you to the Ianello Family for letting us showcase their special family on the cover of this issue. Thank You!

SPECIAL FAMILY FEATURES 28 Playgroups

They’re Not Just for Kids By Meagan Church

Kids Book Review:

30 Welcome Baby in Style!

Reviewed By Brandt

By Jenny Mitschelen

10 The Schwa Was Here

Book Review:

10 Josiah Wolfe, Texas Ranger A Series by Larry D. Sweazy

Family Health

Decorating the Perfect Nursery

32 Baby Showers with a Purpose By Meagan Church

34 Your Kayaking Journey Awaits Bring the Whole Family!

12 Is Being a Mom a Pain in the Back?

By Evie Kirkwood

By Dr. Thomas Mango

36 Camp Kesem

Frugal Family

By Stephanie J. Salisbury

Tips for Postpartum Back Pain Relief

14 Planning a Great Family Reunion By Amy Allen Clark

Family Fashion

16 The Conscientious Thrift and Consignment Shopper By Kathy Friend

Family Matters: 18 Sibling Rivalry

How to Stay Above the Fray and When to Intervene By Kim Seidel

Where Magic Happens

38 Fun at the Fair

And A Few tips to Keep it That Way By Meagan Church

Calendar of Events:

42 Go to www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com for tons of additional family events – updated daily!

Mi Child Magazine: Special Parenting Resource Section

Mi Corner:

62 Yadda Yadda

Book Review: 63 One-Dog Canoe

Reviewed By Kathy Winkel

Mommy & Daddy:

64 Are you a Love Optimist? By Laurie Puhn

66 Wonder Woman By Jane Suter

68 Mompetition

Stephanie Graham

Big Kids:

70 Why Wait?

The importance of saving some good stuff for later By Michelle Wegner

Play Dates:

72 Fun things to do with your kids this month!

Lakeside FAMILY Magazine:

Special Feature Section targeting St. Joseph, Stevensville, Bridgman, New Buffalo and surrounding communities.

LAKESIDE LIVING:

48 Curb Appeal Improve Your Lawn and Your Odds at Selling Your House 50 Summer in Paradise The SMSO’s Ultimate Beach party, And You’re Invited!

BOOK REVIEW:

49 The Invisible Ones Reviewed Mary Czarnecki

LAKESIDE COOKING:

52 Summer Meals by The Lakeside

A Simple and Delicious Meal Sure to Thrill Your Guests By Diane Fisher

LAKESIDE PARENTING:

54 Why Rushing Doesn’t “Save” Time And How to Slow Down By Meagan Francis

LAKESIDE SAFETY:

56 Water Safety in the Big Lake

How to keep your kids safe at the beach this summer By Amy Cahill

LAKESIDE CALENDAR OF EVENTS:

58 Go to www.MichianaFamilyMagazine.com for tons of additional family events – updated daily!

We have it all more at &

St. Thomas the Apostle Catholic School!

Now Registering for NEW Students! • Outstanding Academics • Safe Environment • Excellent ISTEP Scores • SMART Board Technology • Before and After School Care • Christian Family Atmosphere • Community Service Activities and Involvement • Specialty Classes: Art, Music, Computer, Physical Education • Extracurricular Activities ranging from Sports, Band, Scouting, Drama & More! • 21st Century Learning Facility Recently Renovated and Expanded St. Thomas the Apostle School is Catholic in character, but open to all faith traditions. Approximately 12% of our current enrollment is non-Catholic. Please call our school office at 574.264.4855 for more information or to schedule a tour. Visit us at www.stselkhart.com or www.stthomaselkhart.com! St. Thomas the Apostle Catholic School 1331 North Main Street • Elkhart, IN 46514

6 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

FROM THE PUBLISHER

Things We

Happy Father’s Day and Happy Summer! I hope this June finds you enjoying some great family time with your circle of family, friends and loved ones. School is out, schedules are blurry and summertime…is wonderful.

(at FAMILY)

Love

Right Now!

Each year, we publish FAMILY Man, a special June edition in honor of the great family men in our lives. We refer to it as a local men’s health sort of special publication and are excited to be able to provide it again this year. It includes some absolutely fantastic articles that we think your special men will thoroughly enjoy. One particular article that you too may enjoy is about a local men’s Fight Club. Don’t be fooled by the name – take a look and enjoy. It’s awesome for all to read. Then, please pass the attached FAMILY Man Magazine on to a very special man in your life for him to read and enjoy.

1. Baseball

Speaking of men, thanks so very much to all of the men who help us produce our FAMILY and SASSY Magazines each and every month. Our small and mighty magazine team currently includes a staff of all sassy women, and the men behind us are certainly worthy of extra praise this Father’s Day month – from our magazine delivery drivers, to our printers, to our writers, to our dads, husbands and friends. We recently used all of their wit and muscles to get our FAMILY Magazines’ offices moved from Elkhart to City Plaza in Granger, and it was a huge job. Thanks to our special men!

5. The First Ball Park Frank of the Season

Treasure and appreciate the truly great family men and gentlemen that surround us all. Enjoy!

2. Hot Pink 3. Fabulous & Funky Creative Office Space! (Come See our new Family Magazines digs in City Plaza, Granger!)

4. Turtles

6. Great Beach Cover-Ups 7. Iced Tea in a Lovely Glass 8. Golf Etiquette 9. Adirondack Chairs 10. Maternity & Paternity Leave 11. A Hand-Written Thank You Note 12. Saving an Animal 13. Long Hugs 14. Beach Glass

Want the "organic"/green version of The FAMILY Magazine each month with bonus articles? Sign up for our Email Newsletter on our website and get your own organic copy delivered to your email inbox each month!

Find the Hidden Acorn!

For your enjoyment and fun!

Check it Out!

Don’t forget to pick up your copy of the NEW SASSY Magazine!

midlife

CRISIS OR CROSSROADS?

brain matters

THE DIFFERENECES BET

regina

EMBERTON

DEVOTED MOM AND VICE PRESIDENT OF BROKERAGE SERVICES FOR CBRE|BRADLEY

WEEN MEN & WOMEN

on the road to

investing

A ROADMAP FOR BEGINNERS

model hair

TRENDS AND TIPS FOR FABULOUS HAIR THIS SUMMER

GIVE YOUR FEET SOMETHI

TO SMILE ABOUT

SUMMER RULES!

MAKEUP

DO’S AND DON’TS FOR

THE SEASON

FISHING FOR THOSE

SUMMER BARGAINS

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

live your best

The FAMILY Month Calendar 9

Happy Birthday Michael J. Fox!

Jerry Seinfeld is performing at The Morris! “Get Out!”

Flag Day!

THOUGHTS ON DADS: FUN IN THE SUN It’s time to get out and soak up that vitamin D! Here are some fun outdoor activities to do this month. C LO T H D I A P E R I N G Cloth diapering might sound a little extreme, but talk to a cloth-diapering convert, and she might just have you changing your mind! Our fabulous writer Meagan Church has used cloth diapering for all three of her children and swears by it, noting that it’s cheap and far easier than most people think. Her tip for those interested is to actually try it without the commitment. For the first few months, she tested a diapering service that picked up the dirty diapers at her door and delivered clean ones. She also suggests finding a cloth diaper store online. They have starter kits that will give you a feel for the various products on the market. It’s not a big investment and will help you see if you’ll be the next in a long line of cloth-diapering converts! 8 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Fish: You can enjoy Free Fishing Weekends in June. The first weekend in June is Free Fishing Weekend in Indiana, but you can also head up to Michigan on June 9th and 10th to enjoy their Free Fishing Weekend! Best yet, kids under 18 in Indiana and under 17 in Michigan never need a license. Rafting! And we have it right here in South Bend! You’ve probably seen it, but have you tried it? Head on over to the East Race for some whitewater rafting. You must be at least 54 inches tall to participate. For hours, fees and more info, visit sbpark.org/parks/erace.htm.

My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, “You’re tearing up the grass.” “We’re not raising grass,” Dad would reply. “We’re raising boys.” – Harmon Killebrew He didn’t tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. – Clarence Budington Kelland One father is more than a hundred Schoolmasters. – George Herbert Sometimes the poorest man leaves his children the richest inheritance. – Ruth E. Renkel The words that a father speaks to his children in the privacy of home are not heard by the world, but, as in whisperinggalleries, they are clearly heard at the end and by posterity. – Jean Paul Richter

Relay for Life of Elkhart at Concord High School

Steve Miller Band at the Morris

Happy Father’s Day!

The first public demonstration of the colored TV happened on this date, 1929

Summer Solstice

International Picnic Day

26 Tu

fun ways to say, “dad you’re the coolest!” And your dad is, isn’t he? So this Father’s Day, find some creative, outof-the-box ways to say so!

Crafty! Dads don’t necessarily need another tie from the kids who are likely just spending your money anyway. Have your little ones make him something personal he can carry for years, like a keychain. Service! Dads do a lot, so maybe the best way to show how much you love him is to have everyone else in the house do something nice for him, like help tend and mow the lawn! Eats! The best way to a dad’s heart is through his stomach. Surprise him with breakfast in bed!

F I R E U P T H AT G R I LL !

Image not of actual recipe.

Looking for a new recipe to try out on the grill this month? Check out this one from our writer Amy Allen Clark of momadvice.com! Marinated Grilled Shrimp 3 cloves garlic, minced 1/4 cup olive oil 1/4 cup tomato sauce 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar 2 tablespoons chopped fresh basil (I omitted because we did not have any on hand) 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper 1 pound fresh shrimp, peeled and deveined Skewers Directions: In a large bowl, stir together the garlic, olive oil, tomato sauce and red wine vinegar. Season with basil, salt and cayenne pepper. Add shrimp to the bowl and stir until evenly coated. Cover and refrigerate for 1-2 hours, stirring once or twice. Preheat grill at medium heat. Thread shrimp onto skewers, piercing once near the tail and once near the head. Discard marinade. Lightly oil grill grate. Cook shrimp on preheated grill for 2 to 3 minutes per side or until opaque.

JUNE’S A GEM!

Actually, it’s more like three. June has three birthstones: pearl, alexandrite and moonstone. If you know someone with a June birthday, a pretty piece of jewelry with one of these stones might be just the ticket!

EVENTS NOT TO MISS! Relay for Life of Elkhart County Don’t miss this great event brought to you by the American Cancer Society from June 16-17 starting at 10 AM at Concord High School. It’s an overnight relay-style event where teams of people camp out around the track. Members of each team then take turns walking the track during the event. There will be food, games, entertainment and fundraising opportunities. The relay is to support survivors and their caregivers. Registration fee is $10. For more information, visit relayforlife.org or call 574.862.1172. Friday’s by the Fountain Enjoy an outdoor concert series that will feature everything from blues and jazz to country and rock. Every Friday from June 15th to August 31st, from 11:30 AM to 1:30 PM, head on over to the Jon R. Hunt Plaza in front of the Morris Performing Arts Center for lunch and tunes. Downtown restaurants contract to sell food and they offer a variety of lunchtime favorites including pizza, sandwiches, salads and pasta, or you may choose to ‘brown bag’ it. Tables are set in and around the plaza to give the concertgoers a space to enjoy the festivities or you may opt to bring a blanket and relax on the lawn. Cost is free. Brought to you by The Morris, South Bend Tribune and Sunny 101.5. For more info, visit morriscenter.org. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

live your book reviews best

Josiah Wolfe, Texas Ranger A Series by Larry D. Sweazy

Larry D. Sweazy will be speaking at the downtown Mishawaka Library on Saturday, July 14. He won the Western Writers of America Spur Award for Best Short Fiction in 2005 and was nominated for a Derringer award in 2007. He also was a 2010 Best Book of Indiana finalist for the first book in the series below. Born in Anderson, he now resides in Noblesville, IN. This is a series worth checking out! Here is a summary of the books in the series to wet your palate! Book 1: “The Rattlesnake Season” Newly widowed, Josiah Wolfe rejoins the Texas Rangers as part of the Frontier Battalion and is caught in a moral quandary when his first assignment is to escort his friend, a former lawman and soldier, to the hangman’s noose. Book 2: “The Scorpion Trail” Texas Ranger Josiah Wolfe, before meeting up with the rest of the Texas Ranger Frontier Battalion, decides to repay a long-standing debt to Juan Carlos, the man who saved his life, only to find Juan missing, leading him on a dangerous search that brings up old enemies. Book 3: “The Badgers Revenge” When Texas Ranger Josiah Wolfe is overtaken by two Comanche scouts who deliver him to Liam O’Reilly, a.k.a. the Badger, Josiah, with time running out, must figure out why O’Reilly wants him dead in order to survive. Book 4: “The Cougar’s Prey” Going deep undercover as a spy in order to investigate a series of thefts that are riling up local ranchers, Texas Ranger Josiah Wolfe must risk everything to bring the leader of the raids to swift justice if he ever wants to return to his family. *Content gathered from Novelist Plus database 4/27/12.

The Schwa Was Here By Neal Shusterman Reviewed by Brandt One book I really like is called “The Schwa Was Here” which is a story about a boy named Anthony, otherwise known as “Antsy,” who lives in Brooklyn, New York. He is a normal kid with an older brother and a younger sister. Because he is the middle child, he feels like he goes unnoticed. His father works for Phisher Plastic and wants Antsy and his friends to test a new type of plastic. Along the way, Antsy meets a kid named Calvin Schwa, who is very unusual because he is practically invisible. When he meets Schwa, they go off and do many exciting things testing if anybody else notices the Schwa. They get tangled up with old man Crawley while doing some dares and have to do work for him, so they don’t get the cops called on them. While working for Crawley’s, Schwa and Antsy find out that his granddaughter is coming to town. When she gets to Crawley’s, she is not what Antsy expects. He starts to like her and takes her on dates. Schwa also starts to like her, and it frustrates Antsy. Anthony stops talking to Schwa and starts to forget him. One day Antsy goes to see Schwa, and he is not at his father’s house. Anthony gets upset because he feels that he pushed him away.

Anthony then goes around and puts “the Schwa was here,” any place he can. Then Anthony gets a postcard from Calvin. You’ll have to read the rest of the story to appreciate it and find out what happens next! My name is Brandt, and I am 13. I have a sister that is 15, and five animals. My favorite sports are soccer and basketball.

10 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Look who got library cards – meaganchurch

Instagramming at Notre Dame on a beautiful spring day! – tishamattei

Oliver tractor – justashleigh

We love him – momadvice

Use Instagram, a fun photo editing and sharing app for the iPhone, to show us what you see around town and what your family and friends are up to. Your photos may make an upcoming issue! include the hashtag #michmag in your photo captions, and follow us on Instagram, too: thefamilymag.

Chillin’ at Quincy’s! – ellewhite7

Lovin’ her birthday gifts. She’s rockin’ that hat! – jencrutch

I hate driving on this road, but I love walking down it. – ellewhite7

◀ Hanging out with my 5yo grandson. – Dale

Rob & I are taking this crazy crew out for a night on the town. – michellewegner THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

family health

Is Being a Mom aTipsPAIN for Postpartum Back Pain Relief By Dr. Thomas Mango

ack pain during pregnancy is quite common. Studies estimate that between 40% and 50% of expectant mothers will experience lower backaches at some point during the pregnancy. But at some point, you expect that pain to go away as your body returns to normal and you begin caring for your wonderful new child. But what if the pain doesn’t go away? Caring for children of all ages, not just infants, can put strain on your back. Initially, you may be lifting a seven-to-10 pound baby up to 50 times a day for feedings, changings, naps and snuggling. At one year, you are carrying a 20 pound child. By the time he or she is two years old, a mother is chasing and lifting a 25-30 pound toddler. And that’s not including all the “accessories” of parenthood like diaperbags, playpens, pack-n-plays, toys, baby carriers and groceries. Honestly being a parent, especially an active mother, can be a pain in the back. As a spine surgeon and a father of two very active young boys, I have seen my share of back pain. Many new mothers come into the practice with complaints of back, shoulder and neck pain. Don’t worry – there is hope! In this article we will identify the causes of back pain that affect many new mothers and discuss some at-home strategies to reduce or eliminate the pain and discomfort.

Oh, My Aching Back!

Many of the physical changes of pregnancy can have a continuing effect on postpartum back pain. The abdominal muscles are weakened and alter your posture, putting strain on your back. The extra weight of pregnancy means more work for your muscles and increased stress on your joints. Hormonal changes in pregnancy can loosen the joints and ligaments that attach your pelvic bones to your spine. This can cause a feeling of instability or pain when you walk, stand, sit for long periods, roll over in bed, or get up from a low seated position. These changes don’t go away overnight. It takes time for your muscles to regain their strength and tone. Many new moms make their back problems worse by not being conscious of good posture. Just like in the workplace, good ergonomics at home when parenting and doing chores will help keep you from developing body aches. Leaning too far forward when starting to breastfeed puts strain on your neck and upper back muscles. The constant hunching when picking up your child, leaning over for bath time, and bending down to pick up toys can strain already tired back muscles. And do not carry your child on your hip; this overloads the back muscles and causes you to shift your normal stance to compensate for the extra weight of the child. Simple fatigue plays a huge factor when experiencing back pain. Being a new mom 12 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

can be exhausting! Lack of sleep, new demands from the infant, breastfeeding on demand, tending to other children, household chores and spousal needs can be exceedingly demanding. Combine that with poor eating habits and your body is not getting the rest and nutrition it needs to perform properly.

What’s a Mother to Do?

While time is probably the best medicine for a sore postpartum back, there are other ways to get your back, back on track. The following tips should help any mom struggling with back pain: While you may not be eager to be up and about with a sore back, moving and stretching is just what your body needs. Begin a gradual exercise program to restore abdominal and back muscle tone. Walking and swimming are safe ways to start strengthening your core muscles. Enjoy this time as a bonding experience by taking a walk to the park or around the block with your child. Yoga is another gentle exercise that strengthens your abdominals and back without stressing the muscles. It is also a great opportunity for a mom to just take some time to care for herself. Exercise and proper nutrition help with the second tip – losing the pregnancy weight. The risk of chronic back pain is increased with being overweight. Good nutrition will help your body heal faster, but take your time and discuss weight loss goals with your obstetrician before beginning a specific plan. Many areas are now offering innovative mother-child fitness classes. You actually use your newborn or toddler as part of resistancetraining exercises. This has the added benefits of further bonding with your child, socialization with other mothers, and no extra cost for a babysitter. Practicing proper ergonomics is a must! Don’t stretch your arms out to pick up your baby. Bring the child close to your chest before lifting and avoid twisting your body. When lifting a child from the floor, bend at your knees and not your waist. Squat down, tighten your stomach muscles and lift with your leg muscles.

Do not bend over the side of the crib and lift your baby over the top. This puts a huge strain on back muscles. Put the crib side down and pull the child toward you. To avoid upper back pain from breastfeeding, bring the baby to your breast, rather than bending over the child. Also when nursing, sit in an upright chair rather than a soft couch. Don’t physically overload yourself. You cannot pack everything and the kitchen sink in those baby bags, put it over one shoulder, then carry the baby or toddler in the other arm. You can’t carry it all, so when planning a trip – long or just on errands – prioritize what you absolutely need. It is also better to have something to push, so you don’t have to carry everything. A heating pad or hot pack is a great nondrug pain reliever. A warm bath may help relax your muscles and the rest of you as well. Topical treatments like tiger balm and capsaicin roll-ons can help with temporary pain relief. Body massage is a great way to help relieve the tension in your back muscles and to alleviate postpartum lower back pain. These massages can help to stimulate circulation which will aid in repairing damaged muscle tissue. It also gives you the chance to really relax and recover from the challenges of motherhood. A physical therapy program helps many of those suffering from back pain. There are even programs designed to learn good biomechanics: how to lift and carry your baby, how to put the baby in the crib, and how to place a child in a car seat. A physical therapist can teach you exercises to do on your own that will help prevent later episodes of back pain. If your back pain is severe, constant, or getting progressively worse, then it may be time to consult with a physician. Other symptoms to be cautious of include loss of feeling in one or both legs, loss of sensation in buttocks or groin area, or suddenly feeling uncoordinated or weak. See your caregiver immediately if you suffer from these symptoms. Being a new parent is one of the best feelings in the world, and no one should have to suffer with back pain during this amazing time in one’s life. Watch your posture, get plenty of rest, eat right, and try to exercise … sound easy? As parents, we know it is never that easy, but do your best and enjoy every moment with your child. Thomas Mango, M.D. is a boardcertified orthopaedic surgeon at South Bend Orthopaedics, with fellowship training in spine surgery. He is originally from New Jersey and graduated from Northwestern University School of Medicine. He enjoyed the Midwest so much that he moved to Michiana in 2008 with his wife and two active sons.

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family frugal

Planning

a Great Family Reunion By Amy Allen Clark

Thanks to great resources like Skype, Facebook, texting and email, I have to say that I couldn’t have more opportunities to be connected to my family than I do today. But, even with all of these resources available, nothing could replace those times of togetherness and being able to hug and enjoy the company of my loved ones in person. Planning a great family reunion does take effort, but it will create a lifetime of memories your family will long remember. Here are just a few tips to help you plan a memorable family reunion.

On Choosing the Date

The hardest part about planning a reunion is selecting a date that everyone can agree upon. For this reason, plan your date six months to a year in advance, so you can have the best attendance at your event. Holiday weekends like the Fourth of July, Memorial Day or Labor Day are great options for family members who are working or are in school, but your venue must be reserved well in advance of your date. Consider setting up an online poll through Google Documents or Yahoo to choose the date that will get you the highest attendance.

On Picking a Venue

Select a venue that will be easy for your guests to get to and that will also be affordable. If it is a short reunion, look into a hotel that has a banquet facility, restaurants where you can reserve a room, parks with a covered eating area, or churches where you can rent out a space. For longer reunions, consider a vacation rental property that can accommodate overnight guests and that will be affordable by dividing the cost of the rental property.

On Sending Invitations

Send out an invitation to your guests as soon as your location and date have been decided upon. Electronic invitations can help you easily keep track of your RSVPs and also are free to send through sites like Evite.com or PunchBowl.com. That said, paper invitations can really incorporate your decided theme 14 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

and take your event to the next level. Be sure to include a map of your location, what each guest should bring, what to wear and any local information they might need (airport, car rental and nearby hotels).

On Food Choice

Once you have decided upon your date and location, consider what types of food you would like to have at your event. If the event is centrally located, ask family members to bring a family-favorite dish or share a dish that has been in your family for years. If you decide to have your event catered, consider incorporating dishes that speak to your family heritage in a fun and unique way.

On Activities

Plan a few fun activities that will really capture the essence of family while you are all together. For example, have each family member bring a picture or an object that is sentimental to the family and gather these items for a family time capsule. Time capsules can be purchased, or you can put the items in a decorative box that can be brought out for the next family reunion. If your event is centrally located, hold a recipe contest for the “best pie” or the “best family dish” that everyone can vote on at your gathering. Another fun family game you can try is “Guess Who?” but family style! Have guests email you a picture of them from when they were a child. Print out copies of the pictures and make it a party game to guess who is in the pictures. You can also bring along a stack of board games or outdoor games and have families team up to challenge one another. If a television is accessible, the Wii is a fun gaming system appropriate for all ages. In your invitations, ask guests to bring their favorite game so you have a good variety to choose from. Whatever you do and wherever your reunion is held, the important thing is that you are all together!

Go-To Reunion Recipes

Here are two great dessert recipes that would be just perfect for any family gathering! Red, White, & Blueberry Trifle

10 ounces angel food cake, cut into 1-inch cubes 2 pints strawberries, sliced 2 pints blueberries For the cream filling: 6 tablespoons fat-free sweetened condensed milk (I used Walmart Great Value brand) 1 1/2 cups cold water 1 package sugar-free white chocolate instant pudding mix (I opted for the sugar-filled version) 12 ounce fat-free frozen whipped topping, thawed Directions: Whisk the condensed milk and water in a bowl. Whisk in the pudding mix for 2 minutes. Let stand for 2 minutes or until soft-set; fold in the whipped topping. Arrange half of the cake in the bottom of a 14-cup trifle dish. Sprinkle evenly with a layer of blueberries. Spread half of the cream mixture over the blueberries and gently spread. Top with a layer of strawberries. Layer the remaining cake cubes on top of the strawberries, then add more blueberries and top with the remaining cream mixture. Finish with the remaining strawberries and blueberries, arranging them in a pretty pattern. Cover and refrigerate at least one hour.

Red Velvet Cake With Cream Cheese Frosting

1 package (18.25 ounces) white cake mix 1 cup buttermilk 8 tablespoons (1 stick) margarine, melted 3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder 3 large eggs 1 bottle (standard bottle of red food coloring gel) red food coloring 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract Fresh raspberries (optional) Directions: Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Generously grease two 9-inch round cake pans with shortening, then dust with flour. Shake out the excess flour and set the pans aside. Place the cake mix, buttermilk, melted margarine, cocoa powder, eggs, red food coloring and vanilla in a large mixing bowl. Blend with an electric mixer on low speed for 1 minute. Stop the machine and scrape down the sides of the bowl with a rubber spatula. Increase the mixer speed to medium and beat 2 minutes more, scraping down the sides again if needed. The batter should look well combined. Divide the batter evenly between the prepared pans, smoothing it out with your rubber spatula. Place the pans in the oven side by side.

Cream Cheese Frosting 1 package (8 ounces) cream cheese, at room temperature (I used the reduced-fat cream cheese) 8 tablespoons (1 stick) butter, at room temperature 3 3/4 cups confectionersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; sugar, sifted, plus additional if needed 2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract

Bake the cakes until they spring back when lightly pressed with your finger, 28-30 minutes (mine took 25 minutes). Remove the pans from the oven and place on a wire rack to cool for 10 minutes. Run a dinner knife around the edge of each layer and invert each into a rack then invert again on another rack, so that the cakes are right side up. Allow to cool completely, 30 minutes or more.

Place the cream cheese and butter in a large mixing bowl. Blend with an electric mixer on low speed until combined, 30 seconds. Add the confectionersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; sugar, a little at a time, blending with the mixer on low speed until the sugar is well incorporated, 1 minute. Add more sugar as needed to make the frosting spreadable. Add the vanilla, then increase the mixer speed to medium and blend until the frosting is fluffy, 1 minute more.

Meanwhile, prepare the Cream Cheese Frosting (recipe below). Ice your cake and then decorate with fresh raspberries on top.

Amy Allen Clark: Foodie. Bookworm. Novice photographer. Java junkie. Knitter & hot glue gun toting extraordinaire. A lover of the simple and familycentered life. Happily living this contented existence within a penny-wise budget and showcasing it on momadvice.com. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

family fashion

The

Conscientious Thrift

and Consignment Shopper

By Kathy Friend

I’m a huge fan of thrift and consignment stores. It’s fun, it’s a bargain, and you can find amazing items that no one else has. What’s not to love? As a frequent shopper of these establishments, I’ve picked up on a “code of etiquettes.” Many of us might take for granted that shopping is still a very social experience, so, as in all social settings, it’s helpful to be aware of the unspoken rules that guide the thrift and consignment realms. Below are a few real stories along with some sage-thrift advice for all of us consignment/thrift addicts out there – and for those soon-tobe converts still getting their feet wet. These somewhat humorous examples are meant serve as helpful and constructive ways to keep in mind the rules surrounding this fantastic shoppers’ sport!

Scenario No.1

The “It’s Mine” Shopper Shopper: “Hey, Sally, didn’t you used to have this sweater.” Sally: “Yes! That is my sweater. I brought it here last week. Funny! Oh, here is another top I brought here, too.” Sally can then be seen walking up to another shopper: “Hey, that skirt in your hand was mine, too! I loved it. Kinda fit me weird, but will look okay on you!” Moral of The Story: Don’t walk around the store declaring “this was mine” (even if it is true). The fact of the matter is that it can make people uncomfortable.

Scenario No. 2

From the loudspeaker, the following rings out through the store: “Manager to the front. Customer forgot to present coupon before the sale.” Moral of the Story: It can be easy to forget, but if you have a coupon, remember to tell the sales associate at the check-out counter before she stars ringing things up. Many times the coupons are only good for certain items on specific days. It can cause trouble for her if she has to go back through your entire purchase to be sure your items qualify for the discount (not to mention this slows down the people behind you).

Scenario No. 3

The “Oh, Excuse Me” Shopper Shopper 1: “Oh, excuse me. I’m just trying to get to those shirts over there.” Shopper 2: “It’s okay.” While full of politeness, this conversation is repeated at least 10 times over the next 15 minutes. Ultimately irritated, the second shopper leaves the store. Moral of the Story: It’s a great tip – shop the racks in the same direction as the other shoppers. This sounds crazy, but if you don’t do this, you will be stumbling all over each other rack after rack.

Scenario No. 4

The “This is Priced Way Too High” Shopper Shopper 1: “This is a ridiculous price to pay for something that is used!” Shopper 2: “Really? I thought that was a rather good price.”

The “Always Have a Coupon” Shopper Sales Associate: “And your total is $75.82.” Shopper: “Oh, I have this 50% off coupon! Hang on; it’s in this purse somewhere. Shoot! I think I left it in the car. I’ll run out and grab it.” The eager shopper soon returns from her car with coupon in hand.

Moral of the Story: Be careful in how you verbalize concerns about the prices. If you think some items are overpriced, your best bet is to take your concerns to the manager or to leave. It is considered bad manners to complain loudly about the prices to others in the store. They may find the prices to be right-on or even very inexpensive.

Sales Associate: “This only applies to items with prices ending in .98. I’ll have to void out this transaction and start over.”

The “It’s My First Time Here” Shopper This story is from a shopper: “I was shopping around a local thrift

16 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Scenario No. 5

shop last week. This woman was talking to me as we shopped. If she said it one time, she said it a million times, ‘I don’t usually shop at places like this.’ Was she trying to impress me? It didn’t work. I do shop at places ‘like this’ all the time!” Moral of the Story: The fact of the matter is that we think it’s cool to shop thrift and consignment! There’s no shame in it. It’s smart; you can find amazing pieces and things no one else has. If you don’t shop this way frequently, those of us who are seasoned pros can likely tell, so there’s no need to feel self-conscious or let others know that this is your “first time in the store.”

ATHLETIC DEVELOPMENT FOR ALL SPORTS

So the next time you’re out hunting for steals and bargains, keep these stories and etiquette tips in mind and remember to be the conscientious thrift and consignment shopper. It will make your experience, and the shopping experience of those around you, all the better!

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Kathy Friend is a fashion expert, image consultant, speaker and writer. She is a regular on the WFRN Morning Show and on WSBT-TV. She is also the fashion expert for Goodwill stores. She is joyfully married to Marty, and a mom to one little fashionista in training.

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family matters

Sibling Rivalry

How to Stay Above the Fray and When to Intervene By Kim Seidel

It’s almost summer, and your children may be spending more time together. That usually means more arguing, too. The good news is there are ways to help your children learn to get along and to benefit from disagreements. “Ultimately, sibling arguments are not about toys or TV or who got more gifts: Siblings argue because they are trying to find their own place in the family,” says Heidi Smith Luedtke, a personality psychologist, specializing in personal development, people skills and parenting. “Sibling arguments are a reflection of kids’ feelings about who is more important, who has control and who gets more attention from parents.” Heather Kempskie, co-author of “The Siblings’ Busy Book,” echoes Luedtke’s findings. “Beneath the surface of arguments, what siblings truly are competing for is their parent’s time, attention and resources,” she says. “It’s a battle that begins early and lasts a lifetime.” Kempskie and her co-author, Lisa Hanson, who is also her identical twin sister, found that siblings can be meaner to each other than they are to a friend. “That’s because a sibling will be around forever, and friends wouldn’t put up with that,” Kempskie says. Parents of more than one child hear similar disagreements bouncing off the walls of their homes. “Siblings often argue when they don’t want to share toys or when they can’t get along in their shared space – like a playroom, bedroom or living room,” Luedtke says. “They may struggle over who gets to choose the next TV show or whose piece of cake is bigger. They may claim parents always take the other sib’s side or that parents always go to one child’s games or that parents buy more goodies for one child than the other.”

When to Intervene

It may ease your mind to know that sibling rivalry, from short arguments to long shouting matches, are normal. Sibling rivalry is a natural and positive part of your children’s lives. 18 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

“It’s normal to want to level the playing field, but parents need to help kids develop skills they need to stick up for themselves, rather than doing it all for them,” Kempskie says. As a fight escalates, parents should certainly step in when one or all of the siblings are too young to verbalize their feelings or come up with a solution to a problem. It’s also important to intervene whenever the children’s safety is in question, Kempskie says. If no safety issues are involved, parents can sit back and watch for a while, Luedtke advises. “Explain that you are confident that they can come up with a fair and reasonable solution,” she says. If nothing changes in five to 10 minutes, Luedtke says, start asking questions: “What is the problem?” (Give each child a chance to answer.); “What could you do to solve the problem?”; “What can I do to help you with that?” If kids can’t find an equitable solution, you may have to issue a directive, Luedtke continues. These directives may be giving the toy or TV a time out; sending kids to separate rooms; or creating a sharing system (child No. 1 gets three turns, then child No. 2 takes three turns, etc.). “During a calm family time, talk to your children and make it clear that bossiness, yelling and fighting will have a consequence,” Kempskie says. “Remind them of what you expect from them. Good behavior includes using manners, not arguing, talking nicely to each other and doing something without being asked.”

Help Siblings be Friends

Although a home may seem constantly chaotic with arguing, parents can help their children build solid relationships with one another. “One of the best practices is to institute the ‘no compare’ rule,” Kempskie says. “Try to never compare your children. Encourage their uniqueness and let them know how special they are to you.” Parents need to try to “stay above the fray,” Luedtke says. “Parents should be careful not to take sides in sibling squabbles.

“Emphasize the importance of respect and civility. Siblings will not always agree with one another. Kids need to know that it’s okay to get angry, but it isn’t okay to speak in a rude and hostile tone. Name calling isn’t acceptable either.” Another way to improve family relationships is for parents to spend time alone with each child on a regular basis. One-on-one time is a great way to lessen competition for your time, Kempskie says. In addition, the child gets a chance to express their feelings and have a private conversation with dad or mom, Luedtke says. “Get to know your kids as individuals, not just as siblings,” Luedtke says. “When kids feel they are treated as individuals, they are less likely to feel rivalry over parents’ attention and affection.” Parents need to do a realistic assessment of their own behavior. “It’s entirely possible parents are playing favorites, even if they aren’t aware that they’re doing it,” Luedtke says. “Parents may feel a greater need to protect a younger sibling’s interests because they believe the younger sibling can’t stick up for him or herself. Or they may intervene in favor of a shy or silent child, if they believe the aggressive child has the upper hand.”

Benefits of Sibling Rivalry

“When they fight over possessions, tease each other and even when they are getting along, they are learning valuable life lessons,” Kempskie says. These lessons include: how to socialize, negotiate, stand up for themselves, find their strengths and weaknesses and figure out productive ways to handle feelings. Kempskie and her twin believe that siblings are a “gift.” “We share a history with our siblings,” she says. “They are the ones we can remember fond childhood memories with. They are the ones that stick up for us when we really need a true friend. They are the ones that we will grow old with. Siblings are the longest relationship many of us have in our lifetime.”

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Robert D. Lee, M.D. Robert D. Lee, M.D. has joined Drs. Elizabeth Lindenman, David Kramer and Sara Bajuyo as a primary care provider at the South Bend Clinic Ironwood. Dr. Lee provides preventive care, as well as diagnosis and treatment of illnesses and disorders for infants, children and adults. Dr. Lee completed his family medicine residency at Community Family Practice in LaGrange, Ind. He received his medical degree from Indiana University School of Medicine and served an internship at Ball Memorial Hospital in Muncie, Ind. Dr. Lee received his undergraduate degree from Purdue University. To schedule an appointment with Dr. Lee, contact the South Bend Clinic, 574-299-2400. You can also visit us online at www.SouthBendClinic.com.

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family features

Bringing Home Baby

Playgroups

They’re Not Just for Kids

By Meagan Church

Before having kids, I didn’t understand the reason behind a play date. It seemed to me that play dates were superfluous ways of busying the lives of children and forcing the mother to shuttle them around town to yet another activity. Then I had a baby.

I soon realized how isolating being at home with a little one could be. With feedings, diaper changes and scheduled naptimes, simple tasks such as taking a shower each day got moved down the priority list. Rarely did I have the opportunity to dress up and go out with friends. Fortunately some of my friends also had babies at about the same time as me, and a shift in our social calendar began to take place. Instead of dinner and a movie, we started hanging out at each other’s houses or the playground. It was then that I finally realized a play date has little to do with the child. It has more to do with the social connection of the mother…and the sanity it can save.

More mature conversation is exactly what Joanna Azar was looking for when she and some other ladies organized their own playgroup: “I need the contact with other adults to keep me sharp, run ideas past them, get new techniques and more. I need the mental stimulation of conversation with someone above age 4!”

As a work-from-home mom, those connections have been saving graces, and I’m not alone in feeling that. My friend Carrie Smith and I first met in kindergarten and have remained friends ever since, but it was when we had our first children nearly six years ago that we became even closer. We have spent countless hours at parks and on living room floors sharing this life stage with one another.

“I think from the beginning it’s important to have a connection with other women who are going through or have gone through the same emotional and physical changes that you are,” says Rebecca Walton, another member of that group. “I had no idea how something once a week would keep me sane, especially hearing others having similar experiences. They are indispensable.”

“Being a stay-at-home mom can be very isolating. Getting involved with organized moms groups was something I just wasn’t all that interested in, so I was lucky to have quite a few friends and family members with kids that I could get together with,” she says. “Having friends that I can meet with at the playground or at someone’s house was a necessary outlet for me. It has been crucial to maintaining my sanity to have other moms to talk to, both about things related to kids and parenting, and also to have a more mature conversation.” 28 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

The group started when some friends met regularly at the Notre Dame bookstore for Tuesday morning story hours. Now they meet regularly at parks and homes and have invited others to join them along the way.

Making those connections with moms can be difficult, especially if you are new to the area and don’t have a pool of relationships to pull from. Kristy Howell knew only a handful of people when she and her husband moved to South Bend. She knew she wanted to connect with other moms, so she joined the local chapter of the Holistic Moms Group, which she now co-leads.

“It has changed my life in so many ways,” she says. “I have met some amazing people that I know will remain lifelong friends. It has given me confidence as a mother and solidarity when I needed it most. It has also opened my eyes to how much community means.” Dawn Green also decided to try an organized group after speaking with a friend. As a result, she has been attending MOPs for the past five years: “My friend encouraged me to join. I was talking to her about child issues, how lonely I was, and she encouraged me to check out MOPs. It has made a tremendous impact. It has really changed my life, and the life of my children. I have formed some wonderful friendships, and it has strengthened my faith in God. It has given my children a chance to meet other kids they might not normally interact with.” Both Dawn and Kristy are thankful they joined a group and think that other moms who are seeking connections would be as well. “Whatever your passion is, find a group to connect with that passion,” Kristy says. “It has made the journey of motherhood and raising a healthy family so much easier for me. One thing I would say is don’t be afraid that you are not ‘enough’ of whatever the group stands for. I think that idea scares some people away from our group and it shouldn’t. There is such a wide range of parenting styles within our group. The one thing I think we all share is the desire to make informed parenting decisions and lead healthy lives.”

Dawn agreed and says MOPs, “is a great way to fellowship with other women, be educated on various topics, and most of all, take a break from your kids for two hours twice a month.” And let’s face it, a break, whether it be with a childhood friend at the playground or as part of an organized group, is what every mom needs at some point. “Before kids, I worked outside of the home in an office with other women my age. I got to experience these connections on a daily basis and probably took them for granted a little. After kids, it became infinitely more important for me to take the time to seek out those connections,” Carrie says. “It’s easy to get burned out as a stay-at-home mom, and spending time with other adults that may be experiencing the same thing lets you laugh about the stuff you wanted to cry about earlier.”

Meagan Church is a writer and mother of 2.5 kids. Her current projects include DefiningMotherhood, and Unexpectant where she explores the realities of modern motherhood for her book project.

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family features

Bringing Home Baby

Style

Welcome Baby in Decorating the Perfect Nursery By Jenny Mitschelen

Hey Parents-to-be!

No doubt, you are spending your days planning the arrival of your little bundle. The most exciting part is planning that sweet space for your baby to call his or her own. Have you poured through every baby decor catalog? Trekked through the baby superstores? Are you still feeling uninspired? Think outside the box and consider these style options to give your tot a stylish arrival! As always, I recommend beginning by choosing your textiles and let the space fall into place around them. Visit a fabric store or a design professional for inspiration. Each of the following design scenarios begins with fabric!

Traditional with a Twist

If you love the classics pink or blue, but would like to add a bit of updated fun, think bold. Go for large polka dots, chevrons or another whimsical pattern on your textiles. Mix the typical baby blue or pink with chocolate brown, silver gray or even black. Continue the traditional feel by adding silver metallic elements, perhaps with the drapery rod or accessories like a piggy bank or the classic silver baby rattle.

Sophisticated Neutrals

This is an excellent option for those who don’t find out the sex of their baby before the birth. Calming creams and shades of brown create a warm elegance and work well for any style, from country to contemporary. For a current, perhaps more urban feel, try brighter whites and shades of gray from silver to gunmetal. Try one of these schemes on its own or as a subdued backdrop for any more vibrant splashes of color to be added later.

Trendy Baby

Be inspired by the most current color palettes, and you’re sure to bring a dose of unexpected style to your baby’s space. The hottest hue for 2012 is tangerine! Try pairing this vibrant redorange with navy blue or gray for a boy, pink or turquoise for a girl. Another fresh hue being seen everywhere is chartreuse. It is being spotted making a statement with just about any color it is paired with. Trendy baby’s space should have some bold pattern, like a Suzani print, a large scale lattice, ikat or quatrefoil. A hip Lucite mini table and chairs are perfect in this setting. 30 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Country Chic

Yes, we all love the homespun feel of this style. It is perfect for baby, too. Create a stunning baby girl’s sanctuary with cottage florals, a crystal chandelier, and antique furniture painted out white – don’t forget to let the imperfections show. For boys, a simple stripe in the textiles, some burlap drapery panels and an industrial-style light fixture pull of the look with ease. The great thing about many of these options is that they are interchangeable. And a sophisticated neutral can also be trendy. Country chic goes well with some organic elements. If you are still overwhelmed with how to pull off the look you want, call for a professional design consultation and bring baby home to a nursery designed uniquely for your child.

Organic Baby

To create this serene and earthy look, go for reclaimed wood looks, simple organic textiles in shades of white or another very soothing hue. Go easy on the pattern and color, and think texture instead. Add some woven elements, such as a sea grass or bamboo window shade. A sumptuously soft area rug in a chunky weave will pull this space together. The great thing about many of these options is that they are interchangeable. And a sophisticated neutral can also be trendy. Country chic goes well with some organic elements. If you are still overwhelmed with how to pull off the look you want, call for a professional design consultation and bring baby home to a nursery designed uniquely for your child.

Jenny Mitschelen lives in Bridgman, Michigan, with her husband and three adorable children. Having studied interior design for 20 years, Jenny is a decorator and owner of a home based interior design franchise.

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www.goodwill-ni.org THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

2/20/12 11:16:58 PM

family features

Bringing Home Baby

Baby Showers

with a Purpose

By Meagan Church

When it comes to baby showers, a plethora of themes exist. From ducks to Noah’s ark, there are a lot of cute ideas. But what about choosing a theme with a purpose, one that results in something tangible to give the mom-to-be? Consider these ideas:

Go Green

A lot of moms-to-be want to find ways to make more environmentally friendly choices for the benefit of the baby and the world as a whole. Why not support her desire to go green by having a baby shower with just that theme? Every aspect of the shower can be earth-focused. Print invitations on recycled paper or send them via email to reduce paper all together. Make menu options according to local and organic foods that are available. Ask guests to choose gifts with a green mindset. Organic clothing, earth-friendly diaper options, and green soaps and lotions are just a few ideas that would surely please the mom-to-be. 32 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Build a Library

A library full of colorful and engaging storybooks is something that will last long past the newborn stage. Help the mom-to-be build a library for her baby by encouraging guests to forgo the typical card and instead bring a children’s book, along with a gift. Guests can write a message and sign their names inside the cover, so each book becomes a keepsake for the baby. To build off this theme even more, choose a favorite children’s book to inspire the decorations, menu, party games and more. For instance, Eric Carle’s “The Very Hungry Caterpillar” makes a great shower theme. Choose the menu according to the foods found in the book. Find invitations featuring the caterpillar and decorate in the bright colors that are throughout the book.

Make a Onesie

People love putting a personal touch on their gifts, so give them the opportunity to do so at a onesie party. Purchase plain onesies in various colors and sizes and create a onesie making station. Provide guests with a variety of decorating options, so they can create their own unique shirt for the baby. Let guests get creative with iron-ons, fabric paints and markers, stencils, stamps and more. For guests who need a creative nudge, make a few samples, or write down some ideas or slogans. The result will be unique onesies designed with love. With a variety of sizes, the baby will be able to sport these originals as she grows.

“This is an excellent opportunity for the family and friends to learn more about cloth diapers and actually figure out how to use a pre-fold diaper,” Jen says. “I’ve received great feedback that reluctant family members began to support the couple’s use of cloth diapers after the showers I help to host.” The guests take part in games, such as a pre-fold diapering contest and diaper trivia. “This is the opportunity to help everyone else get excited about cloth diapers,” Jen says. In the end, they have the opportunity to purchase items from the mom’s registry and send her home with the cloth diaper system in place before the baby arrives.

Knit a Blanket

Choose Cloth

Diapers are a typical shower gift, but when a mom chooses to use cloth, a package of disposables might not be the best gift option. Cloth isn’t readily available in most stores, so how can you help support her desire to use cloth? With a cloth diaper party. Jen Starks, local owner of the online cloth diaper store Ecological Babies, has thrown a few of these cloth-themed parties. Before the shower, the mom creates a registry, including diapers, covers and other accessories. During the shower, Jen brings the items along and helps show everyone how to use them since cloth diapering can be a mystery to those who haven’t done it for themselves.

Let’s face it; sometimes shower games are more of a form of torture than they are an enjoyable way to spend an afternoon. Honestly, I would rather not try to guess what melted chocolate bar is in that diaper. With a knitting shower, guests keep their hands busy creating a keepsake blanket for the baby, while the mom-to-be opens gifts. Not everyone needs to know how to knit. A few seasoned knitters can teach the others a simple garter stitch, so that each guest can create a four-inch square that will be sewn together to make a patchwork blanket. Consider it a modern quilting bee. Meagan Church is a writer and mother of 2.5 kids. Her current projects include DefiningMotherhood, and Unexpectant where she explores the realities of modern motherhood for her book project.

WELCOME WELCOME OUR NEW INTERNIST

Rita Schmid, M.D.

Rita Schmid, M.D. has joined the Internal Medicine Department at The South Bend Clinic. Dr. Schmid diagnoses and treats adult patients at The South Bend Clinic’s Granger location. She partners with her patients to prevent or manage illnesses, diseases, injuries and chronic conditions. Dr. Schmid completed her internal medicine residency at the University of Cincinnati. She received her medical degree from Indiana University School of Medicine. Dr. Schmid received her undergraduate degree from Northwestern University in Evanston, Ill. Dr. Schmid is board certified by the American Board of Internal Medicine. To schedule an appointment with Dr. Schmid, contact The South Bend Clinic, 574-204-7060. You can also visit us online at www.SouthBendClinic.com.

0 1 1 7

NUMBER 117 NOW SERVING YOU!

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

family features

Summer Fairs & Outings

Your Kayaking Journey

Awaits

Bring the Whole Family! By Evelyn Kirkwood

One word comes to her mind, as Mandy Streib carves her kayak through the flowing St. Joseph River – tranquility . “I like being outside in nature. You see beautiful things like herons, otters and mink,” she says.

Mandy’s rule: when her 9-month-old starts fussing, it’s time to head to shore. “I want the trip to be enjoyable and fun, even if it means we turn back early,” she says. To help make the trip fun, Mandy brings along snacks and recommends getting lifejackets sized to fit the children. Even properly sized lifejackets are often up in the kids’ faces when they sit down. “That’s no fun,” she says, “so, I try to remember that when it’s hot and keep the trip short.”

Don’t let her petite size and peaceful prose fool you though. She’s a competitive racer, a two-time national champion in the twoperson canoe division. But she also has a passion for helping and encouraging others to try paddling sports.

When selecting a kayak to use with little children, be sure to get a cockpit large enough for your toddler to sit in front of you, between your legs.

Mandy and her husband Matt own Fluid Fun in Bristol, Indiana, a one-stop site for kayak and related gear, stocking over 400 kayaks and canoes onsite. Mandy is also a mother of four kids under the age of six and a recent nursing degree graduate. In her busy schedule, family time is important to her.

When Mandy’s kids are older, they get to paddle their own kayak. Her husband Matt sets the rule here: if they can ride a bike without training wheels, they can kayak on their own. A calm lake or pond is a great place for kids to solo. “We tie a rope from our cockpit to the child’s kayak to help guide or retrieve them if they get tired,” notes Mandy.

Family Fun on the Water

“Kayak outings with the kids are a great way to enjoy the outdoors as a family. I might like to paddle longer, but you really have to think about the little ones’ attention span,” Mandy says. 34 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

A Great Sport for Women

Lots of women have gotten into kayaking in the last few years. “Women are stability gifted.” Mandy says, “We carry our weight in our hips. That makes us more balanced in a kayak or canoe.”

Kayaking can also be a finesse sport. You don’t have to muscle or power stroke a kayak. That makes it ideal for couples or family members with different athletic abilities to enjoy together.

Family Activity!

But what about transporting your kayak to the water’s edge? Mandy’s advice: “Think light.” That’s important if you want to be able to load and carry your craft on your own. Lighter boats, made from composites, are more expense, but they are worth it if it makes carrying and transporting easier and allows you to use your kayak more frequently. Select a lightweight paddle as well.

Kayak Rentals

A Few More Tips

For families or beginners, avoid streams and rivers with downed trees. They can be dangerous. The current is stronger than you think. Paddle in calm lakes and ponds, or wide rivers, such as the St. Joseph in Indiana if you are new to the sport or with children. Remember that after a long paddle, you will still have to load your kayak for transport. Enlist help from others at the launch site, or look into rack systems that ease the loading process. When shopping for a kayak, sit in several to find a cockpit size and shape that suits you and a boat style that suits your recreational interest.

BEing A DAD cAn BE tOuGh & Messy AnD ThAT’s worTh cElEBrATing!

If you’re interested in taking up kayaking or learning more, here are some resources to help you on your journey. • Elkhart area: lazydayzcanoe.com • South Bend and Niles areas: St. Patrick’s County Park, sjcparks.org • New Buffalo: Outpost Sports, outpostsports.com

Paddling Groups

• Paddle Michiana: paddlemichiana.blogspot.com • South Bend Paddlers: paddlefest.org/club.html

Tips on Selecting a Kayak:

Check out this website: fluidfun.com

To See Paddlers and Kayakers in Action:

Attend Paddlefest: Sunday, June 24, 2012, St. Patrick’s County Park, South Bend

Evelyn Kirkwood is Director of St. Joseph County Parks in Indiana and host of Outdoor Elements, which is broadcasted Sundays at 9am and Wednesdays at 5:30 pm on WNIT Public Television.

JunE 17 • 9:30AM One service… Outside… ArOund the pOnd A morning full of fun, worship, competitions and manly prizes! Oh, and did we mention MUD? Bring your own lawn chairs and blankets. Park at Goshen Middle School (Shuttle transportation will be provided). huge pre-service Motorcycle ride (Leaves at 8am with a bike blessing to follow) stAy fOr lunch! We’ll have a hog roasting and ready for purchase right after the service. Lots of free giveaways for dads including: A shotgun, kayak, grill, camping and fishing gear, gift certificates and cooler full of MEAT!

GrAce cOMMunity church 20076 county road 36 • goshen, in 46526 info@gracecommunity-church.com • 574.533.7546

children register inside for Kidfest A special morning of fun just for KIDS!! (Sorry kids, but the mud is for dads only... your moms agree).

THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

family features

Summer Fairs & Outings

Camp Kesem

Where Magic Happens

By Stephanie J. Salisbury

The word “kesem” is Hebrew for “magic.” How appropriate, then, that it be used in the name of a camp for children whose parents have or have had cancer. Established in 2000 by Stanford University students, Camp Kesem has been bringing magic to families for over a decade now with local chapters at twenty-three colleges across the country. Children are able to get away with other kids who have faced or are facing similar challenges and just have a great time together doing sports, arts, crafts, drama, having ‘cabin chats’ to share experiences with one another and – the most important part – getting the time to just be kids. Another amazing aspect of Camp Kesem is that it’s completely free for the campers, so parents have one less thing to worry about. Kelly Fallon, college student and co-chair for Camp Kesem Notre Dame, saw a poster in her dorm after her freshman year and decided to take the plunge. She had an interview and was chosen as a counselor for Camp Kesem, a life-changing experience for her. The camp empowers college students to build incredible leadership skills by maintaining and managing their own chapter of Camp Kesem. Kelly thinks this part of the Camp Kesem mission is “a unique aspect of our organization because it teaches students to grow and develop into leaders.” It is clear from her enthusiasm that she is excited about what she does and the effect it has, not only on the campers and parents, but on herself as well. “As one of the co-chairs,” explains Kelly, “I am extremely involved in every aspect, from fundraising to camper recruitment to camp planning. It has been very enlightening to learn how to organize and lead a project of this nature and has really taught me about myself, both as a leader and person.” Add to this the fact that she had three finals this past week and still managed to let me interview her and write an article about this, and you can plainly see the passion Kelly has for her work with Camp Kesem. As a parent with cancer, it might feel difficult to send your child off for a week during this trying time, but at Camp Kesem, you can be certain he is in good hands. Says Kelly, “The parents have given us wonderful feedback over the past years, indicating that the best part of camp is knowing that their 36 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

children are surrounded by other kids who truly understand what it is like to have a parent with cancer. They say that the kids spend all year looking forward to this week, and they can’t stop talking about it when they come home!” Parents can rest assured that their kids are being listened to and cared for as well. All counselors go through training sessions throughout the year specifically constructed to deal with the special needs of children dealing with their parents’ cancer issues. There is a therapist on staff all week for emotional support for either campers or counselors should the need arise. Another fascinating and wonderful part of this camp is that the funds to provide such a thrilling experience for the children are completely raised by the college student counselors. Kelly says, “We work all year to raise enough money to host camp. We do so through letter writing, holding campus fundraisers, applying for grants, and anything and everything we can think of!” Much of their advertising is through word of mouth, but this year they wanted to up the stakes a bit. Instead of the usual 30 campers, they wanted to raise their number to 50, which meant more advertising for recruitment was necessary and more funds coming in as well. “We have been sending out flyers to schools and hospitals, contacting local communities such as RiverBend, and we were blessed enough to have a news segment on WNDU through the help of one of our wonderful parents,” Kelly says. “We welcome parents to contact us with questions or applications, as we are always looking for new campers.”

A typical camper week includes snacks and meals, swimming, nature adventures, campfires and storytelling, tie-dying, capture the flag, scavenger hunts, singing, water games and teamwork. The kids have a great time, make new friends who understand their personal struggles and make some fabulous memories. Kelly’s words ring true and set the tone of compassion for the entire experience: “The bonds created at camp are ones that last a lifetime, not only for the campers, but for the counselors as well! Everyone involved is incredibly passionate about the mission of Camp, and it is an amazing experience to spend a week surrounded by such special people.”

F FAMOR I FUNLY

FRIDAY JULY 20

Join Deion Sanders, Eddie George, Coach Lloyd Carr and others at the 2012 Enshrinement Festival in Downtown South Bend.

EVENTS INCLUDE: �

� �

For more information, please check out the website at campkesem.org.

�

Ribs Cook-Off & Downtown Block Party Cornhole Tournament Hall of Famer Blazer Presentation Live Music Fan Fun Zone Fireworks Museum Spectacular Hours : 9 a.m. 11 p.m.

Stephanie J. Salisbury, University of Michigan graduate, has published two books and maintains a well-followed inspirational blog. She and her husband sing, act, direct and work together.

Complete details online: www.enshrinementfestival.org ensh2012ads_generic4C_HAL854.indd 1

BACK TO LIFE AFTER MINIMALLY INVASIVE SPINE SURGERY

2 0 1 2

5/23/12 4:29 PM

Jodi began experiencing pain in her lower back and left leg. The pain interfered with her lifestyle, and everyday activities like work and exercise became unbearable. Jodi’s lower back and leg pain are in the past after successful spine surgery at South Bend Spine. Using a minimally invasive approach, her orthopedic spine surgeon removed a portion of her lumbar disc that was damaged.

Have a back or neck problem? Call 574-247-6556 to request a FREE 36-page Home Remedy Book.

574-247-6556 www.southbendspine.com 60160 Bodnar Blvd., Mishawaka THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

family features

Summer Fairs & Outings

Fun at the Fair

And A Few Tips to Keep it That Way By Meagan Church

at the Fair

And A Few Tips to Keep it That Way By Meagan Church

Summer has arrived and so has fair season. With the warm temperatures comes the opportunity to explore county and state fairs and festivals. These can be great adventures for the entire family, especially when you take the time to prepare before heading out. So before you race off to grab that deep-fried candy bar or spin yourself silly on the tilt-a-whirl, consider these tips:

Plan Ahead

Before leaving the house, consider what your day at the fair will entail. With the summer sun high above, be sure to lather on sunscreen and protect you and your family by wearing hats. With all the walking through grass, dirt and who-knows-what, it’s best not sport your most fashionable open-toed pumps, so wear comfortable shoes and clothes. Pack your purse with necessary items, such as water and hand sanitizer. If you have little ones, throw in a small, quick snack (something healthier than elephant ears) and a diaper changing pad. Fair restrooms aren’t known for their pristine cleanliness, so plan ahead to protect your child when a bathroom break is necessary.

Stay Safe

With all the commotion, a fun afternoon can suddenly turn into a panic moment if your little one gets separated from you. Let’s hope this scenario never happens, but just in case it does, take a few precautions. First of all, make sure your child knows your cell phone number and make sure your phone is turned on. If your child is too young to memorize your number, consider making a bracelet using number beads to spell out your phone number, or write your number on a piece of paper and pin it inside your child’s clothes. 38 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Be sure to take note of what your child is wearing that day, so if you should need assistance locating her, you can describe her attire. Better yet, if you have a camera phone, snap a picture of her before heading out. Once you get to the fair, choose a meet-up location should you get separated. Look for a large, standout structure that is visible and easy to locate. Also explain to your child that if you do get separated, he should find a police officer or other safe person to help him.

Ride the Rides

What’s a fair without a few rides? Before putting your child onto a ride, be sure to respect the height and weight designations, and only choose to put your child on the ride if she is the right size. Use the safety gear that is provided, whether that is a seat belt or protective bar. Even if the child meets the height and weight requirements, be careful where you place your child on the ride. For instance, on a ride that spins a lot, do not place a smaller child in a location where those riding with her could be forced up against her, pinning her to the side.

Remember, as the parent, you have a right to refuse any ride. If something looks shoddy or unsafe, use your best judgment and move onto a better option.

Visit the Animals

Cows, bunnies and chickens, oh my! What kid doesn’t like seeing the animals? While animals are a big part of county fairs, use a few precautions when checking out the exhibits. Always ask before touching any animal and do not feed them. Sure, those bunnies might be cute and cuddly looking, but don’t place fingers or other objects inside the animals’ cages. Kids are sure to be excited when seeing the animals, but remind them to be calm and quiet. Sudden, loud noises can startle animals, which is another reason to keep a safe distance from livestock especially. Remind your child to not touch his face or mouth, especially if he has touched the animals. Clean his hands promptly. If soap and water aren’t available, use the hand sanitizer you packed before heading out of the house. With a bit of forethought, your time at the fair is sure to be a fun-filled day of memory making and cotton candy eating. So don’t forget to pack the antacids as well!

Meagan Church is a writer and mother of 2.5 kids. Her current projects include DefiningMotherhood, and Unexpectant where she explores the realities of modern motherhood for her book project. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

40 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

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History that moves you. Family fun close to home, weekends all summer long. Father’s Day Weekend June 16 and 17th Dad’s Ride for one dollar - Truck Show on Fathers’ Day Civil War Train Raids June 23 and 24th Fourth of July Weekend Wednesday, the 4th we will continue celebrating July 7 & 8th

Visit us onli

hesston.org

FREE Parking, Rain or shine. Located on CR 1000 N (East of SR 39) 219-778-2783 weekends Museum Grounds open at 11:30. Trains start running at Noon - 5:00 CDT

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Discount Coupon! Bring this ad for one FREE children’s train ride with one paid adult ticket, one free ticket per visit. Offer not valid Labor Day Weekend. Expires 1/1/2012 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

JUNE 2012 Sunday

Drop-in Craft Day Imagine That! Toy Store, Mishawaka

Every Sunday enjoy “Drop-in” Craft Day from 1 to 5 PM. All ages are welcome and an adult must accompany children. Pay $5 for the craft of the day to create and then take home with you! Call 574.254.1600 for more information and for a schedule of upcoming classes also available at the store.

Monday

Storytime Sampler Bittersweet Branch Library, Mishawaka

Storytime Sampler is held every second and fourth Monday of the month from 10:30 AM to 11 AM. This fun library time provides a sampling of the materials used in the preschool and toddler programs. Registration is not required. Call 574.259.0392 for more information.

Tuesday

Storytime at Hammes Notre Dame Bookstore

Every Tuesday near the fireplace in the bookstore, join story time with books, interactive songs and an art project or other activity for young children. Story time is at 11 AM and 1 PM and lasts 45-60 minutes. Check out the Hammes Notre Dame Bookstore Facebook page for an upcoming list of readings (click on the ‘Storytime’ tab).

Storytimes Francis Branch Library, South Bend

Every Tuesday at 10 AM, enjoy stories, music and movement that build early literacy skills and help your young child prepare for future learning success while developing a love of books. Open to children ages 5 and younger; families welcome. Call 574.282.4641 for more info.

Lapsit for Prewalkers St. Joseph County Public Library, Storytime Room

Every Tuesday at 10:10 AM, enjoy books, songs, finger plays and fun for children up to two years who haven’t yet mastered walking on their own. Pre-register online at www.libraryforlife.org or at 574.282.4607.

Wednesday Lapsit

Francis Branch Library, South Bend

Every Wednesday at 10 AM enjoy books, songs, finger plays and fun for children up to two years. Call 574.282.4641 for more info. 42 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Calendar of Events Toddlertime St. Joseph County Public Library, Storytime Room

Every Wednesday at 10:10 AM and 11 AM, enjoy early literacy activities for children ages 2 to 3 ½, including stories, songs and games. Pre-register at www.libraryforlife. org or at 574.282.4607.

Storytime at the Library 10:15 AM– Centre Township Branch, South Bend; Lakeville Branch, Lakeville 10:30 AM – South Bend Branches: River Park, Tutt, LaSalle, German Township

Every Wednesday enjoy stories, music, and movement that build early literacy skills and help your young child prepare for future learning success while developing a love of books. Open to children ages 5 and younger; families welcome. Visit www.libraryforlife.org for more info.

Drop-in Craft Day Imagine That! Toy Store, Mishawaka

Every Wednesday enjoy “Drop-in” Craft Day from 3:30 PM – 5:30 PM. All ages are welcome and an adult must accompany children. Pay $5 for the craft of the day to create and then take home with you! Call 574.254.1600 for more information and for a schedule of upcoming classes also available at the store.

Mom and Baby Exercise Class Thomson’s Physical Therapy, Niles, Michigan

Come get that pre-pregnancy body back while you stimulate your child’s development and learning. Classes are offered every Wednesday morning at 9:30 AM, and free childcare is provided for toddlers during the class (for mothers with more than one). Call for pricing info. For more info call 269.687.9110.

Thursday

Storytime at Hammes Bookstore & Café on Eddy Street

Every Thursday at 11:30 AM, join story time with books, interactive songs and an art project or other activity for young children. Story time is at 11 AM and 1 PM and lasts 45-60 minutes. Check out the Hammes Notre Dame Bookstore Facebook page for an upcoming list of readings (click on the ‘Storytime’ tab).

Drop-in Craft Day Imagine That! Toy Store, Mishawaka

Every Thursday enjoy “Drop-in” Craft Day from 3:30 PM – 5:30 PM. All ages are welcome and an adult must accompany children. Pay $5 for the craft of the day to create and then take

home with you! Call 574.254.1600 for more information and for a schedule of upcoming classes also available at the store.

Friday

Downtown South Bend’s First Fridays

The first Friday of each month explore downtown South Bend from 5 PM-9 PM. Visit www.dtsbfirstfridays.com for a listing of events taking place, including activities and experiences for kids, adults and families.

Saturday

Family Programs at Curious Kids’ Museum

Curious Kids’ Museum and Discovery Zone, St. Joseph, MI

Every Saturday from 12 PM – 4 PM, the museum hosts family-friendly programs that are fun for all ages. Check out the new Discover Zone (for children ages 3 and up); also hosting Saturday family programming at the same time. Call 269.983.2543 for more information. Admission fee or membership to museum is required.

ONGOING JUNE EVENTS Cage Fitness

STAR Martial Arts, Elkhart

Cage Fitness is tested and designed by 9-time Welterweight Champion, Matt Hughes. However, unlike MMA, there is no contact and no partners! Cage Fitness is designed to work out your entire body in only 25 minutes! Come try a free class before you decide you love it! For more information call 574.522.5425.

Friday, June 1

Jerry Seinfeld Back by Popular Demand Morris Performing Arts Center, South Bend

Due to popular demand, America’s premier comedian Jerry Seinfeld is hitting the road in a return to his first love – stand-up comedy. Recently hailed as “the master stand-up comic of his generation” and “the best comedian of our time” in a Washington Post article by Tom Shales, Seinfeld has an uncanny ability to joke about the little things in life that relate to audiences everywhere. From 7 to 9 PM. Tickets start at $44.40. For more info, call the Morris at 574.235.9190.

Monday, June 4

Pop Into the Library for a Craft Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Harris Branch

*Please be sure to call ahead to confirm times and information. Have an event you’d like to submit? Visit www.michianafamilymagazine.com! Children of all ages are invited to participate in Walk-in-Craft Days at the Harris Branch Library on Mondays, June 4 and 18 from 2 to 4 PM. There will be a variety of projects available. Participants are welcome to complete one or all of them. Registration is not required. For more info, call574.271.3179.

Wednesday, June 6

The Montessori Academy at Edison Lakes Coffee and Tour

The Montessori Academy at Edison Lakes, Mishawaka

All are invited to visit Michiana’s only accredited Montessori school, The Montessori Academy at Edison Lakes. The Montessori Academy at Edison Lakes has been serving children toddler through junior high for over 40 years. Please join us for coffee on our beautiful Mishawaka campus and learn about our state-of-the-art, brain-based curriculum. Tours begin at 9 AM.For more information call 574.256.5313 or visit aneducationforlife.com.

Friday, June 8

Ronald McDonald Shows for June Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Branch Libraries, Downtown and Harris Branches

Families are invited to join the fun with America’s beloved clown, Ronald McDonald. Ronald will visit the downtown Mishawaka Library on June 8 at 2:30 PM. Ronald’s next stop will be the Harris Branch Library on June 13 at 11 AM.Tickets are required for showings at both locations. For more information, please inquire at the Children’s Services desk at either location or call the downtown Mishawaka Library at 574.259.5277, ext. 242, or the Harris Branch Library at 574.271.3179.

Saturday, June 9

Zumbathon to benefit Elkhart Relay for Life Star Martial Arts, Elkhart

From 6 to 8:30 PM, Stars Martial Arts will be holding aZumbathonto benefit Elkhart County Relay for Life. Tickets at the door are $15. Advanced tickets $10. Enjoy great music, dance and support the fight against cancer. For more info, call 574.361.5172.

Family Fun Walk Potawatomi Zoo, South Bend

Join in a two-mile walk with the Potawatomi Zoological Society and help support the zoo! Those who walk get a t-shirt and a bag filled with goodies like a pass for a free train ride and admission to the zoo! Bring the entire family. $20 adults, $10

kids ages 3-18, or choose a family 4-pack for $45 (includes 2 adults and 2 children.)From 8 to 10 AM. For more info, visit potawatomizoo.org.

Saturday, June 16

Monday, June 11

Don’t miss this great event brought to you by the American Cancer Society from June 16-17 starting at 10 AM at Concord High School. It’s an overnight relay-style event where teams of people camp out around the track. Members of each team then take turns walking the track during the event. There will be food, games, entertainment and fundraising opportunities. The relay is to support survivors and their caregivers. Registration fee is $10. For more information, visit relayforlife.org or call 574.862.1172.

Theatre Summer Camps at SBCT South Bend Civic Theatre, South Bend

South Bend Civic Theatre will hold summer camps giving students opportunities to have fun and explore theatre with experienced instructors. Kids K-3rd grades have week-long, half-day camps getting creative with jungle creatures, monsters, and the deep blue sea. Those in 4th-6th grade can acquire special skills with workshops in tap, improv and even make their own commercials. 7th-12th grade workshops include improv, acting for the camera, and an introduction to Shakespearian acting culminating in an opportunity to see this year’s performance by the Young Company of the Notre Dame Shakespeare Festival. $150-$350. For full camp listing and descriptions, visit sbct.org.

Wednesday, June 13 Twist and Pop with Balloons

Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Downtown

Children entering grades 4-6 are invited to learn how to twist balloons into shapes with balloon artist Twister Mike at 2:30 PM. Preinflated balloons will be provided.Registration begins Wednesday, May 30. For more information, call 574.259.5277, ext. 242.

Friday, June 15

Fridays by the Fountain Jon Hunt Plaza at The Morris, South Bend

The Morris, South Bend Tribune and Sunny 101.5 present the outdoor summer concert series Fridays by the Fountain. Bands perform during lunchtime on Fridays in June, July and August. The concerts are free and open to the public and run from 11:30 AM to 1:30 PM. Downtown restaurants contract to sell food and offer a variety of favorites including pizza, sandwiches, or you may ‘brown bag’ it. Tables are set in and around the plaza to give the concertgoers a space to eat and enjoy the festivities, or bring a blanket for the lawn. For more info, visit morriscenter.org.

Father’s Day Walk-in Craft Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Downtown

Father’s Day is just around the corner! Children of all ages can visit the library on June 15 or Saturday, June 16 anytime from 10 AM to 4 PM to make a special card to give to a special guy. No registration is required. For more information, call 574.259.5277, ext. 242.

Relay for Life of Elkhart County Concord High School, Elkhart

Sunday, June 17

28th Annual Father’s Day Festival and Corvette Car Show Lemon Creek Winery, Berrien Springs, MI

Bring dad to enjoy a great Father’s Day. Musical guest Libido Funk Circus will be performing, and Dad won’t want to miss the Corvette car show as the Corvette Coventry Club of Southwest Michigan will be there. There will also be wine tasting and an outdoor kitchen, along with games for the kids and a bounce house. Hayrides are also available. $10 per person for those 21 and older with valid ID. Kids 21 and under are free when accompanied by a parent. For more info, visit lemoncreekwinery.com.

Monday, June 18 Basic Canning

Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Bittersweet Branch

Edie Sutton from the Purdue Extension Office of St. Joseph County will present “Basic Canning” at 3 PM. The program will cover the equipment, supplies, process, products, and current techniques. Participants are encouraged to ask questions. Registration is not required. For more info, call 574.259.0392.

Tuesday, June 19

Abracadabra Magic with Magician Kevin Wilson Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, All Branches

Kevin Wilson delights and entertains using his magic. Midnight, a live rabbit, will be on hand to help with the magic and visit with the children after the show. Kevin and Midnight will kick things off at the Harris Branch Library on June 19 at 2:30 PM. On June 20, appearances continue at the Bittersweet Branch Library at 2:30 PM and the downtown Mishawaka Library at 7 PM. Tickets are required for all shows and will be available beginning Tuesday, June 5. Adult caregivers must attend with children age seven years and under. For THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

more information, please inquire at the Children’s Services desk at any location.

For more information, inquire at the Children’s Services desk or call 574.259.5277, ext. 242.

Thursday, June 21

Wednesday, June 27

Preschool Class: Experience Art at the SBMA! South Bend Museum of Art, South Bend

The preschool class is for ages 2-5. Parents, bring your children to the South Bend Museum of Art to explore the process of art! This is just the right age to learn how fun art can be while exploring, drawing, painting, prints and collage. Be ready to get dirty as we introduce your child to the wonders of their imagination! Class will meet once a week for 6 weeks on Thursdays: 10:30 to 11:30 AM. SBMA Members: $72; nonmembers: $90. For more info, visit southbendart.org.

Saturday, June 23

Second Annual Blues & Ribs Fest At Coveleski Stadium Coveleski Stadium, South Bend

Join the South Bend Parks & Recreation Department for some of the Best blues, ribs, and good times, all to raise money and awareness for special needs facilities and programming. Jimmie Vaughan The Tilt-a-Whirl Band, this year’s headline band, features Lou Ann Barton. Funds raised from this event will support the design and construction of Miracle Park, a uniquely designed facility for special needs individuals, and special needs programming within the South Bend Parks & Recreation Department. Gates open at noon. Buy tickets in advance for $20 through The Morris Center box office or for $24 at the gate. Visit morriscenter. org for more info.

Monday, June 25 Nature Camp

Woodlawn Nature Center, Elkhart

Spend the morning in the woods for a whole week. There is so much to see, hear and smell if you have a whole week to just relax and enjoy. Walk, run, collect leaves, sketch the plants and animals, do nature crafts, lie on a blanket and have a snack while reading books about trees and plants. From 8 to 11 AM. $60. From June 25-29. For more info, call 574.215.3895.

Eye-Popping Fabulous Fashions Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Downtown

At 2:30 PM, children entering grades 3-6 are invited to stop by and decorate a shirt or a pair of flip-flops to wear during these warm summer months. Bring a white shirt or pair of flip-flops (preferably new), and the library will supply the decorating materials. Registration is required and begins Monday, June 11. 44 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Parachute Play!

Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Library, Bittersweet Branch

Children entering preschool through grade 6 are invited to have fun playing games and other activities with the parachute on June 27 at 2 PM. Children seven years of age and under must be supervised by an adult caregiver. Registration is required and begins June 13. For more info, contact or call 574.259.0392.

Thursday, June 28

The Steve Miller Band at the Morris The Morris, South Bend

One of rock music’s all-time greats, The Steve Miller Band has sold more than 30 million records in a career spanning more than 40 years. From 8 to 10:30 PM. Cost: $72.50, $62.50, $52.50, $37.50. For more info, visit morriscenter.org.

Saturday June 30th Bonneyville Millers Vintage Base Ball Match Ox Bow Park, Elkhart

Come see your Elkhart County Vintage Base Ball Team take on the Huntington Hilltoppers in a “gloveless” game of historical base ball. The “ballists” will dress in Civil War Era game attire and use rules from the 1860s! Fan participation makes this a blast. Fun for the whole family! From 1 to 3 PM. Admission is free. For more info, visit elkhartcountyparks.org/bonneyvillemillers.htm.

Art BLAST! 3rd Annual Art Festival Creative Fish Art Gallery, Syracuse

Come join in the fun and a great day of art, music, and good food. There will be 50+ artists selling in many different mediums. This is a family friendly event with something for all ages. Artist can call and reserve their 10 X 10 booth and receive more information. Admission is free. From 8 AM to 4 PM. For more info, visit creativefishartgallery.com.

UPCOMING JULY EVENTS

Friday, July 13

Yard Sale at A Rosie Place A Rosie Place, South Bend

Don’t miss the 3rd Annual Yard Sale at A Rosie Place, Indiana’s first specialty hospital offering respite services to medically fragile children and their families. Call 574.235.8899 to arrange drop off of donations. Come and shop Friday and Saturday, July 13 and 14. From 9 AM to 4 PM. For more info, visit arosieplace.org.

FAIRS &

FESTIVALS Friday, June 8

Saint Andrew 37th Annual Greek Festival St. Andrew Greek Orthodox Church, South Bend

Don’t miss the great food, music, Greek dancing and more. The festival is from Friday through Sunday: Friday from 4 to 11 PM, Saturday noon to 11 PM, and Sunday 11 AM to 6 PM. Tours of the church will also be available. Children can enjoy the play area and games. For more info, call 574.277.4688.

Saturday, June 16

Toast the Coast at the 7th Annual Lake Michigan Shore Wine Festival Weko Beach, Bridgman, MI

Enjoy the wine and the sun! While you have wine on the beach, you’ll also get to enjoy live music from acts like the Cathy Richardson Band, JC Brooks & the Uptown Sound, and P.S. Dump Your Boyfriend. $10 for 21 and older, and you receive a wine tasting souvenir glass! Free for kids 12 and younger. Visit lakemichiganshorewinetrail.com for more info.

June 22-24

Elkhart Jazz Festival Downtown Elkhart

It’s the Elkhart Jazz Festival’s 25th anniversary, and you don’t want to miss it! There will be six downtown stages and tons of great acts. Check out all the great artists that are going to perform and buy tickets at downtownelkhart.org/elkhart-jazz-festival.

Sunday, June 24 Paddlefest

St. Patrick’s County Park, South Bend

The Paddlefest canoe and kayak events are geared toward both beginner and advanced paddling abilities. Races are held for all ages. This event is sponsored by Michiana Watershed, Inc. and St. Joseph County Parks. For more information on events available and pricing, visit the Paddlefest website at paddlefest.org.

Friday, June 29 Meet Me on the Island

South Bend Museum of Art, South Bend

Don’t miss this year’s Meet Me on the Island presented by The SBMA and 88.1 WVPE. The whole family will enjoy an evening of art, music and libations with the tunes of Darryl Buchanan and the Reflections. Also enjoy and shop local art. Event is on the island behind the Century Center. From 5:30 to 9 PM. $5 admission, but kids 12 and under get in free. For more info, visit southbendart.org.

June 29 to July 7

St. Joseph County 4H Fair St. Joseph County 4H Fair Ground, South Bend

Don’t miss the 9-day event that is sure to have something for the entire family! Fun events and entertainment includes fireworks, a laser show, fun demonstrations, and much more. General admission at the gate is $8, children 8 and under get in free. Enjoy a special rate of $4 on July 4th! From 1 PM to 10 PM. For more info and a listing of all the great activities, visit 4hfair.com.

July 8-14

La Porte County Fair La Porte County Fair Grounds, IN

It’s Indiana’s oldest county fair! Among the great food, demonstrations and entertainment are performances by Eli Young Band, Colt Ford and Ted Nugent! Learn more about the great acts taking place by visiting laportecountyfair.org.

July 20-July 28

Elkhart County 4-H Fair The Elkhart County 4-H Fairgrounds, Goshen

Don’t miss one of the largest county fairs in the nation. For 9 days, attendees will enjoy all the fair has to offer, including national acts performing in front of the free grandstands. Among the events are the RV rallies, Michiana Mennonite Relief Sale, and performances from Styx and Thompson Square. For more info, visit 4hfair.org.

August 13-18

Berrien County Youth Fair Berrien Springs, MI

Don’t miss out on this huge fair event in midAugust. There are tons of things to see and do, and there will be great entertainment like Bullmania, Motocross, truck and tractor pull, and acts like Bret Michaels and Justin Moore. To check out all that’s happening at the fair, visit bcyf.org/index.php.

THANK YOU

to our monthly distribution partners Allied Pediatrics Chic-Fil-A Clay Preschool & Church Debbie Werbrouck School of Dance & Music Early Childhood Development Center at Notre Dame Elkhart General Hospital Eye Site Optical Family Sports Time Pub Friends Preschool & Daycare Granger Community Church Growing Kids Learning Center Gymnastics Michiana Kumon Learning Center Menno Travel Midwest Orthotics Mutual Bank Notre Dame Federal Credit Union Once Upon a Child Soccer Zone South Bend Clinic South Bend Medical Foundation St. Thomas the Apostle School Strikes & Spares Traditions Photography Trinity Lutheran School Victorian Pantry YMCA of Elkhart If you would like to receive The FAMILY Magazine at your familyfocused business or organization each month, please email your request to: media@michianafamilymagazine.com. THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

FA M I LY T I M E I S A L W AY S B E T T E R N E A R T H E L A K E

Special Section Summer in Paradise

The SMSO’s Ultimate Beach Party, And You’re Invited

Curb Appeal

Improve Your Lawn and Your Odds at Selling Your House

Summer Meals by the Lakeside

A Simple and Delicious Meal Sure to Thrill Your Guests

Why Rushing Doesn’t “Save” Time And How to Slow Down

Water Safety in the Big Lake

How to Keep Your Kids Safe at the Beach this Summer

Photography: Classic Image Photography, Granger

MichianaFamilyMagazine.com

lakeside living

Curb Appeal Improve Your Lawn and Your Odds at Selling Your House

Jason Cameron, licensed contractor and TV host.

When it’s time to sell your home, you want to do everything you can to make it enticing to potential buyers. One of the most important things you can do is boost your home’s curb appeal. In fact, the National Association of Realtors says that curb appeal sells 49 percent of all homes. To help you build curb appeal from the ground up, TruGreen and Jason Cameron, licensed contractor and TV host, have teamed up to give you some simple, doable tips to improve your lawn and landscape.

Water Right

Improper watering can be a big drain on curb appeal. Check the

working condition of sprinkler heads and water lines to make sure they’re working properly. To ensure your manual or automated watering system covers the landscape efficiently, set a one-inch deep empty food can in the middle of your lawn so you can measure the depth of water collected each watering cycle. In addition:

Don’t over water. Watering too much can result in shallow plant roots, weed growth, storm water runoff, and the possibility of disease and fungus development. Give your lawn a slow, steady watering about once a week. Adjust your watering schedule depending on rainfall, as well as your grass and soil type. Trees and shrubs need longer, less frequent watering than plants with shallower roots. The best time to water is early morning, between 4 and 7 a.m. This helps reduce evaporation since the sun is low and winds are usually calmer and temperatures cooler. The Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) says that you can lose as much as 30 percent of water to evaporation by watering midday. Always be mindful of local water restrictions. Take advantage of rain. Let nature water your landscape as much as possible. Rain barrels are a great way to harvest rain for watering your plants later on – and it saves you money on your water bill.

Complement With Color

Create an instant pop of color to help your home’s curb appeal. Consider your home’s exterior when selecting flowering plant combinations for plant beds, window boxes or front porch planters. With a white house, any color combination will work well. With a yellow house, red or pink blooms tend to complement best. 48 LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Here are some other colorful tips to keep in mind: For a calming effect, use cooler colors like blue, green and purple. They blend into the landscape for a peaceful look. Bold colors add excitement to the landscape. Warm yellows, oranges and reds make the garden lively. Yellow reflects more light than other colors, so yellow flowers will get noticed first. To brighten up a dark or shady corner, use pale colors, like pastel pinks and yellows. Not all color needs to come from flowers. Foliage can be a great landscape enhancer, so look for colorful grasses and plants like silvery lamb’s ear, variegated hostas and Japanese painted ferns.

Three Ways to Boost Curb Appeal for Under $100

Want to add curb appeal, but don’t have much money to spend? Here are some simple things you can do for under $100. Clean up the yard. Put away unused items, like lawn furniture. Clear leaves and branches out from under shrubs, other plants, and the house foundation. Make sure the lawn is free from debris and that grass clippings are not left on the driveway or sidewalk. Borrow or rent a power washer to clean off the driveway, steps, sidewalk and porch. Trim, prune and divide. Overgrown plants can block light from getting inside the house, and they make the house and yard look unkempt. Trim shrubs, making sure to remove dead branches. Get rid of dead or diseased plants in the landscape. If you have perennial plants that have gotten too big, divide them and plant them in other places around the landscape. Add new mulch. Mulch not only helps your plants, but it gives garden beds a neat and tidy finish. Wood mulch comes in different colors, but to showcase your plants the most, consider a dark brown mulch – it resembles fresh, healthy soil, so your eyes are drawn toward the plant and not the mulch itself. To get more tips, and to watch Jason Cameron in seasonal webisodes on curb appeal on behalf of TruGreen, visit TruGreen.com.

lakeside

book review

8,000

SUBSCRIBERS AND COUNTING...

Thousands of local parents are connected to The Lakeside FAMILY Magazine through Facebook, Twitter & E-Blasts.

Reviewed by Mary Czarnecki St. Joseph/Maud Preston Palenske Memorial Public Library

WHY? To connect with other parents, get instant updates on fun things to do and parenting news, enter Facebookonly prize giveaways and more.

British author Stef Penney calls this endeavor a “book noir,” since the atmosphere is very much in keeping with the genre of film noir. A private detective, Ray Lovell, takes on an assignment to find Rose Janko, a young gypsy woman who has been missing for seven years. Her father has come to Ray because Ray is a half-blood gypsy, and in the closed gypsy community, family secrets cannot be shared with outsiders.

GET IN THE LOOP. SO YOU CAN GET THE SCOOP.

The story takes place in England during the 1980s, meaning that Ray must use landline telephones, go door-to-door and do the investigative leg work necessary in a world without the instant access of cell phones and the internet. In doing his research, Ray doesn’t find much to go on since young Rose submitted to an arranged marriage to another “pure blood” Romany and then, after less than a year, took off – leaving her new husband and baby. No one had heard from her since. Until now.

Facebook.com/Lakeside-Family-Magazine @LakesideFAMILY1

There are several plot twists and a patient, unwinding of the story as we watch Ray unravel his case, fall in love with a gypsy woman and almost die from a bizarre poisoning attempt. In fact, the story begins with his hospitalization from this deadly encounter. He is half paralyzed and hallucinating, trying to remember exactly what happened and how to get back to his detective work. The trail has seemingly gone cold, but Ray can’t help but see some patterns in the interviews with Rose’s family. And as he strikes up a friendship with her teenage nephew J.J., he wonders how anyone who knew Rose could have let her go off and lose contact. Someone is not telling the whole truth and hiding the real reason she disappeared. This is a good story and very well told. The characters here are intriguing, and you don’t want to put this book down, although you also don’t want it to come to an end either. Penney’s writing reminds me of Carlos Ruiz Zafon’s books: the story is dark, there is relentless mystery, and even though you do find out what happened to the characters at the end, there still seems to be more to it. It reminds us that we can never know all the secrets someone possesses, but can only get a glimpse down into that deep well. LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

lakeside living

Summer in

Paradise

The SMSO’s Ultimate Beach Party, And You’re Invited! The Southwest Michigan Symphony Orchestra (SMSO) is throwing the ultimate beach party to start the summer off right. Dubbed Summer in Paradise, the event will be held on Saturday, June 23 at 6:30 p.m. at Silver Beach. If you like Jimmy Buffett, island music, or you like to dance, you gotta come to Summer in Paradise! Live music will be provided by duo Lana D. Wordel and Joe Sonnefeldt of the Pan Go Steel Band, as well as Jimmy Buffett tribute band The Last Mangos, who will take you to paradise with classics such as Margaritaville, Come Monday, Cheeseburger in Paradise, and Fins. “We really hope the audience has as much fun as we do,” says Mike Minestra of The Last Mangos. “We just have fun up there and hope that it translates back to people.” If you can’t spring for $100 tickets to see Buffett himself in Chicago the following weekend, Summer in Paradise guarantees devoted Parrotheads the same “island-escapism” experience without breaking the bank! Entrance to the party is $25 in advance or $30 at the gate. The first 50 people to enter through the ticket gate the night of the concert will receive a complimentary fin hat, courtesy of 1st Source Bank. (Gate opens at 5:30 p.m.). Once inside, attendees can enjoy a variety of beach fare such as Cheese Burger in Paradise, key lime carnita tacos, volcano nachos, margarita pizza, veggie burgers and popcorn. You can also sip on refreshing summer drinks like Leinenkugel Summer Shandy, Blue Moon Summer Moon, Lime Melondade, Margaritas, Corona and more. 50 LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Escape to Home.

Beautiful Plants. Fresh Produce. Unique gifts.

Besides the great food and drink, you’ll also love the music. The Last Mangos are the area’s premier Jimmy Buffett tribute band. Comprised of Mike Minestra (lead vocals and acoustic guitar), Jimmy Coulford (drums), Dave Cooper (electric guitar), Eric Cronin (percussion), Jeff Pisarsky (keys), Roger Schmalenverger (bass and vocals), and Leslie Beukelman (vocals and mango horns), these talented and experienced musicians came together several years ago to recreate the spirit and fun of an authentic Parrothead experience. Incorporating the look, feel and staging of a Jimmy Buffett concert, The Last Mangos dress in Hawaiian shirts, throw leis and beads out into the crowd, wear crazy hats and interact with the audience.

We really hope the audience has as much fun as we do. We just have fun up there and hope that it translates back to people. - Mike Minestra of The Last Mangos.

The Pan Go Steel Band, formed in 1988 by Paul G. Ross, has long been the preeminent professional steel band in the Midwest. The musicians that make up this ensemble are among the elite percussionists in the Chicago area with diverse musical backgrounds that encompass a wide range of skills and a vast breadth of musical experience. Combining percussive excitement, pinpoint precision, dynamic range, and cutting-edge musical arrangements with world-class steel pans of the finest caliber, Pan Go strives to raise concert steel band performance to new heights. Their concerts have introduced thousands to the joyous sound of steel band music while expanding perceptions as to what a steel band can truly be.

5865 Sawyer Road • Sawyer, MI 49125 • 269-426-8810 • sawyergardencenter.com

Look Your Best

with a style from Klippers Family Salon!

Klippers SALON

FAMILY

Redken • Matrix • Nioxin • Rusk • OPI • CND Shellac A Family & Kid Friendly Salon • Open Monday-Saturday 269-465-3444 • 4520 Lake St. • Bridgman, MI

Great Lakes Montessori

Summer Camps

INCREDIBLE JOURNEYS!

Week #1 "Journey through Prehistoric Animal Life"– June 11-15 Week #2 "Journey through the Stone Age"– June 18-22 Week #3 "Journey of the Pilgrims" – June 25-27 Week #4 "Journey to the Old West" – July 9-13 Week #5 "Journey of the Modernization of Transportation"– July 16-20 Week #6 "Journey through the Air"– July 23-27 Week #7 "Journey into Outer Space" – July 30 - August 3 Week #8 "Great Animal Migrations" – August 6-10 Week #9 "Journey into the Sea" – August 11-15

Speciality Camps (9 week sessions) Math Camp Science Camp Spanish Camp Art Camp Spalding Camp Soccer Camp (Reading and Writing Program) T-ball Camp Language Camp Survival Camp Full Day Camp – $180.00 per week, 7 am- 5:30 pm 5 Day Camp – $125.00 per week, 10 am- 3 pm 3 Day Camp – $90.00, 10 am- 3 pm

*$6.00 an hour for early or after camp care.

www.greatlakesmontessori.com 3084 Niles Road • St. Joseph, MI 49085 • 269.556.0354

LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

lakeside cooking

Summer Meals by The Lakeside

A Simple and Delicious Meal Sure to Thrill Your Guests By Diane Fisher

hen planning your summertime meal for guests, you can serve a delicious, elegant, yet easy menu with just a little practice.

Living in Southwest Michigan, my husband and I entertain out-ofstate guests just about every week during the summer. The lake draws them like flies to pies. When we have guests, one of our favorite meals to prepare is planked salmon! Everyone, unless they just really don’t like fish, loves it, and we enjoy making it for them. My husband, Mike, has gotten quite good at manning the grill. 52 LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

We use a Weber charcoal grill for our outdoor cooking, but a gas grill can work equally as well if that is what you prefer. Timing is essential when feeding hungry guests. No one wants to eat part of their meal followed with a side that didn’t get ready on time. The below meal is great to use to avoid this problem. Cook the plank with salmon on the “blank side” of the grill and the asparagus on the other (about half way through the cooking time of the salmon). The trifle and lemonade (see below) should be made the day before and well chilled. Serve with some crusty bread, and you are all set! Your guests will be pleased that you took the time to make them something special. (They don’t need to know just how easy it was!)

Planked Salmon

Salmon Steaks (about 4-6 ounces each, and similar in size and thickness) Olive oil Salt and pepper Cedar planks Charcoal or Gas grill cooking: Place charcoal briquettes on one side of the grill bottom rack. Light and allow to ash. Soak the cedar planks in water for approximately 20-30 minutes. Check the salmon steaks for any hidden bones and remove if necessary. Place empty plank on the opposite side of the grill that the briquettes are on (if using a gas grill, only light one side and place the plank on the opposite side). Close lid on grill and heat empty plank. Rinse and pat the salmon dry; drizzle a little olive oil on the presentation side of the salmon and place presentation side down on top of hot plank. Allow to cook for about 5 minutes. Carefully turn salmon over with the skin side down. Allow to finish cooking until flakey and tender. Do not overcook. If plank catches fire, spray with water, or place lid on grill to extinguish. Remove planks from grill, and place salmon on serving platter and serve immediately with butter or lemon. *Cedar planks can be purchased at fine gourmet kitchen stores (usually one time use), or can be made using untreated cedar planks from your local lumber store, cut to length desired. Planks can be used more than once if washed immediately with a scrub brush and hot water. Use lemon juice and salt as a scrub to disinfect. Dry thoroughly and wrap in paper to store.

Grilled Asparagus Asparagus Olive oil Garlic, chopped Salt and pepper

Wash and pat dry the asparagus. Slice the asparagus in half from top to bottom. Heat the oil in a pan, and sautĂŠ the garlic over medium low heat until fragrant. Add the asparagus and sautĂŠ until crisp and full of color. Add salt and pepperâ&#x20AC;Śserve!

Angel Strawberry and Banana Torte Angel food cake out of the pan Fresh strawberries, washed, dried, quartered Banana slices Cool Whip Banana flavored instant pudding Milk

Tear angel food cake into bite size chunks (or slice horizontally into layers). Mix the banana flavored pudding with some milk to make a slurry. Fold in the Cool Whip until well incorporated. If using torn pieces, use a trifle bowl, and layer cake, fruit, whipped topping, cake, fruit, topping, etc. End with topping. Garnish as desired. Chill and serve! If using horizontally sliced cake, mix 2/3 of the strawberries and bananas into 2/3 of the Cool Whip. Spread onto first layer, adding second layer, spreading again, adding third layer and topping with whipped topping and remaining fruit. Chill, slice and serve!

Thirst Quenching Fresh Lemonade 2 cups fresh lemon juice 1 2/3 cups sugar, or to taste. Add enough cold water to make a gallon Fresh lemon and lime slices fresh strawberries

Mix the lemon juice, sugar and water together. Mix until dissolved. Chill well. Before serving, place 1/2 bowl of ice in punch bowl along with lemon and lime slices and strawberries. Pour chilled lemonade over ice and fruit and serve.

Diane Fisher owns Catering By Design, LLC in St. Joseph, Michigan. She is married to Mike and they have three grown children and one granddaughter. She gives cooking classes for all ages at Perennial Accents in downtown St. Joseph.

LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

lakeside parenting

Why Rushing Doesn’t

“Save” Time

And How to Slow Down By Meagan Francis “Slow down!” I remember my mom saying to me constantly when I was a kid. I moved too fast and was constantly whacking my knees and shins on end tables or catching a hip or shoulder on the door frame. I cracked my head on a lot of open cupboard doors because I was in too big a hurry to close them. In general, I am a pretty fly-by-the-seat-of–my-pants kind of person, and sometimes that works really well. I jump at opportunities others would ponder for months; when I put my mind to something, I make it happen – and often in record time. But this kind of get-up-and-go has its drawbacks. I’m not always terribly deliberate in my actions. I leap, then look, and if I didn’t land on sure footing, I usually hurry and move onto the next thing, sometimes before I’ve bothered to learn my lesson. I’m inclined to avoid the slow route to…well, to anything. Yet often I just create more work and hassle for myself because I have to double back later or spend more time to correct something I didn’t do properly the first time. Here’s a case in point: when I go to the grocery store, I’ll often forget something on my list and remember only when I return to the car, or worse, when I’m driving out of the parking lot. Then I have that forehead-slapping moment when I realize the item has been forgotten. I then wrestle with that side of my personality that wants to keep momentum and forward motion going. • Going back for the forgotten item would take me – at most – 15 minutes. • It would save me a return trip and all the time and hassle that would entail. • It would mean my pantry or refrigerator would hold some essential item that might make getting dinner on the table that much easier. • And yet returning to the store once I’ve already walked out that automatic door feels like moving backward. I’m already in the car! I’m already headed home! I can’t go back now! So, too often, I just say, “Eh, forget it” and leave – and then have another forehead-slapping moment later when I realize how much extra work I’ve caused for myself by refusing to go back. That’s why I’m working on creating a new slowing-

54 LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

down ritual, using this five-step plan:

1. Try to Treat Whatever I’m Doing as a Pleasant Experience, rather than one more thing to check off the to-do

list. In the case of grocery shopping, if I’m with my kids, I can use the time to chat with them and teach them how to choose produce rather than murmuring “Mm-hmmm” distractedly while rushing through the store. I can take time to read labels and inspect new cuts of meat or unfamiliar grains rather than just chucking the same-old, familiar stuff in the cart. I can try samples, notice smells. Imagine dishes I’d create with this spice or that pasta. I can use all my senses.

2. Slow Down. If I find myself huffing and anxious because the motorized cart in front of me isn’t moving quickly enough or because I managed to choose the checkout with the cashier-in-training, it’s a good indicator that I need to slowwww down. And slowing down physically, I’ve noticed, often encourages my brain to slow down, too. 3. Evaluate Frequently. In the grocery store, that means that before I leave each department, I check back over the list one more time to make sure I got everything I needed – and do the same thing again before I enter the checkout line. When I take a moment to evaluate my progress, I am a lot more aware of what I’m doing and what I need to do next.

by that panicked, flustered feeling of having “messed up” and “wasted time,” take deep breaths. Remind myself that this time is not wasted. That my kids are fine. That nothing is going to fall apart at home in the fifteen extra minutes it’ll take me to go back to the store. That the time spent now will save me time and effort later this week. Grocery shopping is far from the only example of things many of us rush through in our lives. Personally, I often rush through my work and then have to go back with a fine-tooth comb later, looking for mistakes. I can’t be bothered with instruction manuals, which too often leads to a screw ending up in the wrong hole or a deformed-looking Lego creation. And sometimes I even rush through pleasant conversations with my kids because I want to move on to the next thing. I know some of my quickness is just personality, and I can’t change who I am. But I can work to be more aware of this tendency so that I can recognize when it’s working against me and create new rituals to help me live more slowly, mindfully and deliberately. Not only will it help me enjoy those moments more (instead of just wanting to get them over with), but it will save me from living that moment when I realize I really needed that extra butter I refused to go back for. I’ve learned that the fewer of those “doh!” moments I have, the happier I am as a mom.

4. Be Willing To Put Myself In Reverse. If I get to

my car, to the edge of the parking lot, or even halfway home and realize I still forgot something, I have to ask myself, “Do I really have anything better to be doing right this moment? Is getting home fifteen minutes earlier absolutely crucial?” If not, turn around and go back. 5. Breathe And Do A Reality Check. If I feel overcome

Meagan Francis is a mother of five and lives in St. Joseph, Michigan. She is also author of “The Happiest Mom: 10 Secrets To Enjoying Motherhood.”

Make it a

Mathnasium Summer! Most students lose 2 to 2.5 months of grade level equivalency in mathematical computation skills over the summer months.

Summer Hours:

Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays 9am-2pm Tuesdays and Thursdays 2pm-7pm

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www.mathnasium.com LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

lakeside safety

Water Safety in the Big Lake How to keep your kids safe at the beach this summer

Last summer, my then-5-year-old daughter found herself in over her head in Lake Michigan. One minute, she was standing on a sandbar in water up to her chest. The next minute, she walked off the sandbar and was unable to touch the bottom. Fortunately, I realized she was in trouble in time to fish her out with no harm done. However, it still makes my stomach clench to think about what could have happened if I had not been able to reach her in time. With its glorious beaches and clear blue water, Lake Michigan is a favorite summer destination for families. Kids can spend countless hours building sandcastles, chasing seagulls and splashing in the 56 LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

By Amy Cahill

waves. The lake is so appealing; it is easy to underestimate its deadly potential. Last year, at least 44 people drowned in Lake Michigan, according to the Great Lakes Surf Rescue Project. The non-profit organization is dedicated to tracking drowning incidents, educating the public about the dangers of rip currents and teaching surfers to perform water rescues. “It’s very ironic that something that gives us such pleasure often causes such tragedy,” says Bob Pratt, executive director of the Great Lakes Surf Rescue Project.

Basic Precautions

According Pratt, the key to ensuring kids are safe in Lake Michigan is keeping a close eye on them. For younger children, he recommends practicing touch supervision and staying within arm’s reach of your child at all times. Parents who are not strong swimmers should have their children wear life jackets whenever they are in the lake. Pratt also recommends that parents with iffy water skills strap on a life jacket, too. Inflatable life jackets that look like waistpacks are available for parents worried about their beach style. When you’re at the beach with a group, Pratt stresses the need to designate someone to watch the kids. “Everybody thinks that somebody is watching the children, when nobody is,” he says. He advocates creating a card or lanyard with a whistle that the dedicated water watcher holds. If that person stops watching the water, they must pass the item to another responsible adult. Other basic precautions include never swimming alone and never swimming while under the influence of alcohol, Brian Bailey, director of the Berrien County Parks says. Swimming in an area with lifeguards is also a good idea, experts agree. Silver Beach in downtown St. Joseph is one of the few beaches in southwest Michigan with lifeguards. Bailey, who oversees Silver Beach, says even when lifeguards are present, parents still need to be responsible for their children. Lifeguards are watching thousands of people and may not see a child in trouble in time. “It doesn’t take but a few seconds for a child to disappear under the water,” he says.

What Drowning Looks Like

It takes less than a minute for a child to drown, says Frank Jennings, Boating and Water Safety Program Manager for the Great Lakes Coast Guard. And the American Academy of Pediatrics reports drowning is a leading cause of death for children. Bob Pratt from the Great Lakes Surf Rescue Project says it is vital for parents to know what drowning looks like. “Drowning doesn’t really look like what people think it looks like,” he says. While most people picture drowning victims waving their arms and yelling, in reality, it is generally a silent process because drowning victims are too busy trying to breathe to yell for help. People who are in trouble in the water are generally vertical with their head tipped back and their mouth at the water level, Pratt says. They typically extend their arms out to the side in an attempt to keep themselves afloat.

Flag System

Parents also need to be aware of the weather. The National Weather Service issues rip current and wave warnings. The Michigan State Parks and some other beaches use a flag system to warn beachgoers about water conditions. A green flag means lake conditions are safe with a minimum of wind and wave action. Rip currents are not expected. A yellow flag means lake conditions are moderately dangerous with 2- to 4-foot waves, or there are strong winds offshore. Rip currents are not expected.

A red flag means lake conditions are extremely dangerous and swimming is not advised. Waves are expected to be larger than 4 feet, and rip currents are possible. A red flag is also used when the water is contaminated. “If they’re letting their kids swim, and it’s a red flag situation, they’re not being responsible parents,” says Harold Herta, chief of resource management for the Michigan Department of Natural Resources. Herta encourages visitors to the state parks to swim in designated swim areas. Staff members check the swim areas regularly for underwater holes, broken glass and other hazards. “If you’re outside of that area, you’re kind of on your own because we don’t verify its safety,” he says.

Rip Currents

Rip currents are one of the biggest dangers in Lake Michigan, especially in the southern end of the lake. “The waves aren’t nearly the problem that the rip currents are,” Herta says. “It’s an unseen danger.” A rip current occurs when waves make a hole in an underwater sandbar. As waves move water toward the shore, the sandbar will trap the water. Then, the water will suddenly rush back out into the lake through the hole in the sandbar. As the narrow band of water rushes out, it causes a strong current capable of sucking swimmers out into the lake. The key to surviving a rip current is not to fight it. Let it pull you out past the sandbar where the current will dissipate. Then, swim parallel to shore to get away from the rip current. Once you are clear of the current, begin swimming back to shore. “The way to escape a rip current is not to fight it,” Herta says. “It’s like quicksand.” Bob Pratt compares being caught in a rip current to being stuck on a conveyor belt. He recommends floating on your back to conserve your energy until you can make your way back to shore or rescue squads can arrive.

What to do if Someone is in Trouble

If you see someone caught in a rip current or a child in danger of drowning, have someone call 911 before attempting to save him or her. You want to have the professional rescue teams on the way as soon as possible. Be sure to take your cell phone to the beach so you can call for help if you need to, Pratt says. Try to get a flotation device to the person in trouble. One attached to a rope so you can tow the person back to shore is ideal. Many beaches are equipped with lifesaving rings. However, kids’ noodles, boogie boards, surfboards and cooler lids will all work in a pinch, Pratt says. Finally, consider learning CPR, so you are prepared to help in an emergency. With a little precaution and preparedness, a day at Lake Michigan can be a magical outing full of wonderful memories for you and your family. Amy Cahill is an award-winning freelance writer based in Stevensville, Mich. She and her husband have two children who provide most of the inspiration for her parenting articles.

LAKESIDE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

JUNE 2012

Lakeside FAMILY Calendar of Events Friday, June 1

Mondays

Wednesdays Story Time

Jerry Seinfeld Back by Popular Demand

Bridgman Public Library, Bridgman

St. Joseph/Maud Preston Palenske Memorial Library, St. Joseph

Morris Performing Arts Center, South Bend

Baby N Me

A program for parents, caregivers and their babies from newborn to 24 months.Parents guide their babies through creative movement, songs, dance, story-time and more with the help of instructor Teri Sue Wines. Parents will have the opportunity to interact with their babies, meet other parents and give their babies a chance to play with others. Registration is required. Free event. From 10:45 to 11:15 AM. For more info, visit bridgmanlibrary.com.

Bedtime Story Time Lincoln Township Library, Stevensville

Stories, songs and crafts for preschool and early elementary ages. Free event. From 7 to 7:30 PM. For more info, visit lincolntownshiplibrary.org.

Tuesdays Baby Laptime

New Buffalo Township Library, New Buffalo

Enjoy a special time for songs, stories and lap rhymes for you and your baby, ages 3 to 18 months. This is a free event. From 11 to 11:30 AM. For more info, call 269.469.2933.

Story Hour Bridgman Public Library, Bridgman

Story Time for ages up to age 3 and story time for ages 3-5 are held in two locations within the library at the same time. Free event. 10:30 AM. For more info, call 269.983.7167. youseemore.com/maudpreston

Wee Discovery Curious Kids’ Museum on the Bluff, St. Joseph

Preschool story and hands-on discovery activities. Free with admission of $4 per person or your membership. 10:30 AM. For more info, visit curiouskidsmuseum.org.

Mom and Baby Exercise Class Thomson’s Physical Therapy, Niles, Michigan

Thursday, June 7

New Buffalo Township Library, New Buffalo

St. Joseph/Maud Preston Palenske Memorial Library, St. Joseph

Story Time for kids up to age 3 and story time for ages 3-5 are held in two locations within the library at the same time. Free event. 10:30 AM. For more info, call 269.983.7167 or visit youseemore.com/maudpreston. 58 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Lakeland Community Hospital, Niles

Lincoln Township Library, Stevensville

Walk-in Story Time

Toddler N Me

Story Time

Breastfeeding Class for Moms and Dads at Lakeland HealthCare

Thursdays

Enjoy stories and songs for preschoolers. Free event. From 10:30 to 11 AM.

For parents, caregivers and their child from 2-5 years old.Parents guide their toddlers through the joys of toddlerhood with creative movement, songs, dance, finger plays and more with the help of Teri Sue Wines. Parents will have the opportunity to engage one on one with their little one, meet other parents and give their little one a chance to play with others. Registration is required. Class offered 9:30 to10 AM or 11:30 to 12 PM. Free event. For more info, call 269.465.3663.

Tuesday, June 5

Breastfeeding provides the best nutrition for your baby and is a special time for mothers and babies to bond. The class will cover: The benefits of breastfeeding, how to know when your baby is hungry, proper latch-on methods, checking your baby’s input (feeding) and output (dirty or wet diapers), how to prepare to return to work and weaning. From 6 to 8:30 PM. $30 due at registration. For more info, visit lakelandhealth.org/breastfeeding.

Come join Teri Sue for lots of fun as she reads stories and sings songs. Make great crafts and have a snack, too! Registration is required. For 2-5 year olds.Free event.Starts at 10:30 AM. For more info, call 269.465.3663.

Bridgman Public Library, Bridgman

Fridays

Storytime Fun A program designed for preschoolers, bring your child and enjoy stories, songs and crafts! From 10:30 to 11:15 AM. Free event. For more info, call 269.469.2933.

Fun Friday Lincoln Township Library, Stevensville

Stories, songs and take-home crafts for preschoolers.Free event. From 10:30 to 11 AM. Visit lincolntownshiplibrary.org.

Saturdays Free Crafts!

Lakeshore Learning Store, Sterling Heights, Michigan

Every Saturday from 11 AM to 3 PM, Lakeshore Learning Store offers free craft activities for kids ages 3 and up at all of their locations! Please visit lakeshorelearning.com.

Lakeland HealthCare Free Dinner and Seminar

Lakeland Regional Medical Center, St Joseph

This free dinner and seminar will feature Kenneth Edwards, MD, a local practicing orthopedic surgeon and Medical Director of Surgical Services at Lakeland HealthCare. Women slowly begin to lose bone mass in their mid-30s, and quickly in their 40s and after. Learn why it’s important to keep moving and how to prevent falls, both for yourself as you grow older and to help your parents or grandparents. From 5:30 to 8 PM. Free. To learn more or reserve your seat, call 269.556.2808.

Friday, June 8

Saint Andrew 37th Annual Greek Festival St. Andrew Greek Orthodox Church, South Bend

*Please be sure to call ahead to confirm times and information.

Monday, June 11 Bedtime Story Time

Lincoln Township Library, Stevensville

Early elementary age and preschoolers are invited for an evening of stories, songs and crafts! From 7 to 7:30 PM. For more info, visit lincolntownshiplibrary.org.

Wednesday, June 13 Need A Read

Bridgman Public Library, Bridgman

A new twist on the original “Book Club.” Join us as we share on books we have read with a great group of readers. From 2 to 3 PM. Meets on the second Wednesday of the month. For more info, visit bridgmanlibrary.com.

Saturday, June 16

Relay for Life of Elkhart County Concord High School, Elkhart

Sunday, June 17

Dunes Discovery Camps Dunes Learning Center, Chesterton

Explore rivers, search for salamanders, play a beautiful beach, hike through a national park, cool off in Lake Michigan, laugh with new friends, and sing around the campfire. Camp lasts Sunday afternoon to Friday morning. Session 1: June 1722, Session 2: June 24-29, Session 3: July 8-13. Register online at duneslearningcenter.org and to learn about pricing.

28th Annual Father’s Day Festival and Corvette Car Show Lemon Creek Winery, Berrien Springs, MI

Moon Myths

Tuesday, June 19

Lakeland HealthCare FREE “Stop Stressing Your Heart” Class Center for Outpatient Services, St. Joseph

Stop Stressing Your Heart is a free, interactive class that will explain the signs and symptoms of stress as well as provide stress management techniques. Registration is encouraged, but not required. From 6:30 to 7:30 PM. For more info, visit lakelandregional.org or call 269.556.2808.

Knit N’ Yarn Bridgman Public Library, Louise Christensen Community Room

The Knit N’ Yarn group does more than work on their own projects. Currently they are making hats, socks, booties and blanket buddies for the Musoma Children’s Home in Tanzania, Africa. They have also started working on their annual donations for the Bridgman Cares program sponsored by the Bridgman Lions Club and knitted items to be donated to a local nursing home for the holiday season. This group receives no funding and does these projects because of a desire to give someone knitted love. The group welcomes anyone who does needle crafts of any kind. If you would like to join the group, they meet every Monday and Thursday from 1 to 3 PM. and the third Tuesday of each month at 6 PM. For more info, visit bridgmanlibrary.com.

Friday, June 22 Elkhart Jazz Festival Downtown Elkhart

It’s the Elkhart Jazz Festival’s 25th anniversary, and you don’t want to miss it! The festival is from June 22-24, and there will be six downtown stages and tons of great acts. Check out all the great artists that are going to perform and buy tickets at downtownelkhart. org/elkhart-jazz-festival.

Wednesday, June 27

Lincoln Township Public Library, Stevensville

Is the moon really made of cheese? What about other myths surrounding the moon? Learn about the moon in this program for those in grades 5-12. Starts at 2 PM. Registration begins June 11. For more info, visit lincolntownshiplibrary.org.

Thursday, June 28

Babysitting with Confidence Class Lakeland Regional Medical Center, St. Joseph

Created specifically for adolescents, this course covers a variety of topics intended to give the confidence and knowledge for caring for small children, including questions to ask before taking a job, expectations of a baby sitter, telephoning in an emergency, home and fire safety, first aid and much more. This class is offered free-of-charge and is available to anyone who has completed the 5th grade. Preregistration is required and class size is limited. From 8:30 AM to 12:30 PM. For more info, visit lakelandhealth.org or call 269.556.2808.

The Steve Miller Band at the Morris The Morris, South Bend

Friday, June 29

St. Joseph County 4H Fair St. Joseph County 4H Fair Ground, South Bend

Don’t miss the 9-day event (from June 29 to July 7) that is sure to have something for the entire family! General admission at the gate is $8, children 8 and under get in free. Enjoy a special rate of $4 on July 4th! From 1 PM to 10 PM. For more info and a listing of all the great activities, visit 4hfair.com.

Quilts of Valor

JULY EVENTS

Bridgman Public Library, Louise Christensen Community Room

New Buffalo Independence Celebration

Quilts of Valor meets monthly to make quilts that are sent to wounded soldiers that are in the hospitals recovering from injuries. This is a non-for-profit organization. Stop in and see what they have made. Donations are always welcome. They meet the 4th Wednesday of every month from 9 AM to 4 PM. For more info, visit bridgmanlibrary.com.

Tuesday, July 3 New Buffalo, MI

Start your holiday early with New Buffalo Business Association at a beach celebration. Free concert by Southwest Michigan Symphony Orchestra, made possible by Pokagon Fund, with a huge fireworks display as grand finale on Tuesday July 3rd. Several family events scheduled for the rest of the week and weekend including: professional volleyball tournament, surfing demos, movies, live music and sand sculpting! Celebration lasts from July 3 to July 8. Free admission.For more THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012 59 info visit newbuffalo.org.

The Local Parenting Resource for Expectant Parents and Families with Younger Children

Special Section

Yadda Yaddas

Are You a Love Optimist? Wonder Woman Mompetition Why Wait?

The importance of saving some good stuff for later

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mi Corner Our tips, picks, news and advice.

a d d a Y a d d a Y

Have a Yad you'd like da Yadda to share? S e n d it to kerri@mic hianafam

ilymagazi

ne.com!

If you ever need a laugh or a new perspective on life, just talk to a kid. The stuff that forms in their brains and manages to fly out of their mouths is absolutely priceless. And we have some examples from our readers to prove it! I was explaining to my son how babies are born and doing my best to use all of the proper names. All of the sudden, my son looks up at me and says, “Wait a minute. How can grandma and grandpa live in Virginia if they're not babies?” I still can't say Virginia without laughing. ~ Jane

My husband generally gets ready for work at the local Y after a morning workout. One night, my son Patrick was watching him prepare clothes for the next day. Suddenly he asked, “Daddy, do you need to take extra clothes with you in case you have an accident?” ~ Amy

My son Jonas, age 5, while watching “The Cat in the Hat” said, "Whoa! That is definitely not real! Cats don't wear bows. Well, they do sometimes, but they definitely don't drive!" ~ Meagan

As we were traveling to visit my parents for spring break, the conversation turned to a broadcast we were looking forward to watching on the internet when we got there. Our youngest piped up, “I don't think we can watch it there – Who's going to explain the internet to Poppy?” ~ Tracy

Picked up the rental car for our trip, and Lauren yelled, “Look, Mom! No rust!” Well at least no one can claim our child is spoiled. ~ Kristin

62 MI CHILD MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

My five year old is very interested in planets and the solar system. One day while we were out running errands he said, “For a small planet, this sure is a big world.” ~ Sarah

Story Time

One-Dog Canoe By Mary Casanova

Reviewed by Kathy Winkel Children’s Services Supervisor Mishawaka-Penn-Harris Public Library Ah, summer – the time for all of those fun outdoor activities like hiking, biking, swimming, picnicking in the park, and even taking an adventurous ride in a canoe. And in the children’s story “One-Dog Canoe,” an adventure is just what happens to a little girl and her dog as they set out expecting a quiet canoe trip together around the lake. The canoe hasn’t gone very far when they encounter a beaver who asks “Can I come, too?” The response from the little girl: “There’s not much room. It’s a one-dog canoe.” “But with a slap and a swim, Beaver scrambled in.” As they continue on their trip, the group comes upon several other animals that ask, “Can I come, too?” Eventually, a loon, a wolf, a bear and a moose are also added to the canoe. The final straw comes when the frog asks to come along, and with a “Plop! Swoosh-a-bang-flop!” he jumps in, tipping the canoe and throwing everyone into the water. Readers of all ages will enjoy the author’s use of rhyming, catchy and silly text that makes one laugh out loud. Through the use of pencil and watercolor, the illustrator adds to the fun by creating hilarious expressions on the faces of the characters and remarkably clever details. Be sure to look for the frog on every double-page spread as he follows the group along. This picture book is perfect to share with very young listeners (3 to 7 year olds), and it will remain a delightful story for older children as well.

MI CHILD MAGAZINE | MAY 2012

M i C H I L D • S P E C I A L PA R E N T I N G F E AT U R E S E C T I O N

Mommy & Daddy

Are You a

Love Optimist? By Laurie Puhn

Research shows that couples who blissfully stay together for a lifetime have an uncanny ability to downplay the negative and highlight the positive in their mate and their relationship. When you are with your friends, do you talk up your mate’s overall helpfulness or do you prefer to tell a juicy story about the one incredibly thoughtless thing he or she did? It’s all in the eyes of the beholder. Take this joke, for instance: A woman’s husband has been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come near him. As she sat by him, he said, “You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?” “What dear?” she asked gently. “I think you bring me bad luck.”

64 MI CHILD MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

When you started your relationship, you talked like an optimist, expressing joy and happiness about building a future together. As the years progressed, you and your mate probably shifted into a pessimistic auto-mode in which you talk more about what is wrong and less about what is right. How can you renew the optimistic feeling you once enjoyed?

Seek Out The Positive

For one thing, find a single positive in your relationship every day and say it out loud. Yes, you think your spouse knows that you are happy when he or she arrives home, but if you don’t smile and greet your mate with a warm hello or a hug, then you are leaving your honey in the dark. Even if things aren’t perfect at home, every day you must find one upbeat moment to focus on. For instance, if you and your partner bicker a lot, but were more civil on a certain day, point that out: “Hey, did you notice that we didn’t argue at all today? I’m proud of us.” Or if your mate made a generous offer, recognize it and say, “That was kind of you to offer to go to the doctor with me. Your support means a lot.” Just because your mate did something to tick you off early in the day, don’t ignore something positive done later.

complaining, fighting or rudely putting each other down in front of others. They are a toxic couple, sapping other people’s optimism and draining their energy. If you have the misfortune of spending time with a couple like them, I suggest you exit as soon as possible because pessimism and optimism are contagious. It is rewarding to spend time with people who are upbeat and show appreciation and respect for each other. Finally, practicing optimism means finding and sharing a variety of activities with people who inspire love, peace and joy in your life. Don’t make your love relationship the one meaningful thing you have. Widen your lens. Get involved with people and interests to complement your relationship with your mate. Do you like to go for walks in the park? Do you enjoy exercise, yoga, sports or cooking? Do you have a close friend who likes to do those things? Call him or her more often. Do you like to write, paint or knit? Then introduce your child to those activities. If becoming a love optimist seems like work to you, just consider the time and energy you will waste as a pessimist who instills anxiety, worry, anger and fear into your relationship. Practice these uplifting strategies, and in days you will discover that you like yourself, your mate and your life much more. Laurie Puhn is a Harvard-educated lawyer, couples mediator, relationship expert, and bestselling author of “Fight Less, Love More: 5-Minute Conversations to Change Your Relationship without Blowing Up or Giving In,” who appears on Good Morning America, 20/20, Fox News and CNN. Most importantly, she is a wife and mother to two young children. Visit her interactive site at www.fightlesslovemore.com.

Surround Yourself with Upbeat People

Next, choose your friends wisely. On the TV show “Saturday Night Live” there is a recurring, hilarious skit about the Needlers, “a bickering couple who should be divorced.” The couple is always

Books, Buddies Blankets &

Every Wednesday from 10:30a - 11:00a Wednesday, June 6 – Wednesday, August 1 At Urban Swirl Heritage Square, Granger Each week Heritage Square Merchants will offer exclusive sale prices for all Books, Buddies, and Blankets participants!

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Community Reading

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Family Time with Heritage Square

This is a fun 9 week program that gets kids excited about reading. We will meet at Urban Swirl in Heritage Square. The program lasts from June 6 through August 1, every Wednesday from 10:30AM to 11:00AM. Kids get a card that’s stamped every week they attend. At the end of the program, everyone will be awarded a prize! There will also be a grand prize for the boy and girl who attend the most story times.

Each week, an influential community member will read to the group. After 20 minutes of reading, kids will enjoy 10 minutes of Q&A time where they get to know the community members and what they do! Heritage Square is a family oriented lifestyle center attracting families from across Michiana for shopping and dining. We strive to offer families a fun, interactive way to spend time with their children in a unique setting.

Books, Buddies, and Blankets is brought to you by Heritage Square & Michiana Family Magazines!

www.shopheritagesquare.com MI CHILD MAGAZINE | MAY 2012

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Mommy & Daddy

onder W Woman

By Jane Suter

I distinctly remember being very small and encountering adults who would bend way down to interrogate me about my future career path: “So, what do YOU want to be when you grow up?” I always felt a little terrified when asked this question – like, if I gave the wrong answer, I would be obligated to work in that profession forever. So I often tossed out a bunch of options, just in case my conspiracy theory was accurate. If I recall correctly, my choices were usually a veterinarian, a famous actress or singer, and finally, Wonder Woman. This last one was a wild card, but hey, in my mind it could happen. And that’s the point. I really believed in all of these possibilities. I even reckoned I could do a few of them simultaneously because I was that awesome! It didn’t matter that my singing voice was horrible or that science was my worst subject; I was positive I had it goin’ on! 66 MI CHILD MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

But something happened on the way to my invisible jet. My supreme confidence began to wane. Maybe it was the humongous brown, herringbone glasses I was forced to wear in the third grade? Or the braces cemented to my teeth in middle school? I don’t know. What I do know is that I veered like mad from my earlier, mega-fantastic charted course and wound up here. No magic lasso, no stadiums filled with adoring fans and no Ph.D. How did I get it so wrong? More importantly, how do those select few get it right? In order to guarantee my son’s future success, and because I’m such a super-cool mom, I decided I would try to make my children’s dreams a reality. So I called them into the kitchen, bent way down, and began my own crossexamination. The oldest decided, after a whole lot of waffling, that he wants to be a scientist … or a police officer … or a superhero when

he grows up. That last one made me smile. It also gave me proof positive that, yes, he really is my child. Last week I wasn’t so sure. But I digress. My youngest, Mr. Smarty Pants, gave me definitive answers. He wants to be a paleontologist in the summer and a zookeeper during the winter. Period. Alrighty then. It was now my mission to find mentors for my kids. Luckily, my friend’s husband is a scientist. He has a doctorate in something I can’t even pronounce, let alone spell, but I know it’s a really fancy job. I wonder if he would be up for a play date with a 9-yearold? As for the little one, his dreams were a teensy bit more challenging. And when I say teensy bit more challenging, I mean entirely impossible! After internet searches and Facebook pleas, I realized paleontologists and zookeepers are a covert bunch. I would have had an easier time if my son had said he wanted to be the President. At least I know where that guy lives. With no money to hire a private investigator, I focused on my oldest. Gleefully, I informed him of his upcoming internship. I practically sung out the words, “Guess what? Momma got you an afternoon with a real scientist! We’re talkin’ Petri dishes, test tubes and white lab coats. Aren’t you pumped?” In my head, Reese would immediately fall to his knees, praising me, his sainted mother, for all of my effort. What really happened was this: The kid looked at me funny and snorted. “Moooooommmm. I don’t want to be a scientist. That was sooo last week! I want to be an astronaut now.” Seriously? A spaceman? Who knows them…? *Sigh.* After canceling the laboratory play date, I pondered my own lot in life. Even though I’m not famous (or even a veterinarian), if I really think about it and squint my eyes just right, most of my dreams really have come true – especially the superhero gig. Honestly, what mom doesn’t have a cape flowing underneath her street clothes? As for my future astronaut and dinosaur hunter? Well, I think they’ll find their own way just fine. Even without my help. And should they falter, I’ll be right here to give them a boost. After all, if I can grow up to be Wonder Woman, then the sky is the limit for them, right?

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Jane Suter is an award-winning writer and mom of two very energetic boys, one in kindergarten and the other in second grade. Born in Chicago, she is proud of her Midwestern roots. MI CHILD MAGAZINE | MAY 2012

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Mommy & Daddy

Mompetition By Stephanie Graham

Mompetition: n – variant of competition. The sometimes overwhelming urge that my child be more advanced than yours. At anything.

It can start as early as a few months with the triumph that my baby is already rolling over and no one else’s did at that age, or the embarrassment when my 14-month-old doesn’t walk and my friends’ children have been running laps around him for months. For Heather Hall, local preschool teacher and mother of a 4-year-old boy, it was difficult when her little one was late in many of his milestones. Now, her son is often in class with her.“ I feel the pressure as a teacher to be a role model, making good choices in correcting him. I feel like he needs to be the ‘good boy’ since I’m his teacher and his mommy.” It is a common motherhood phenomenon, and it can get much more complicated as children get older. Jeannie Kanaby, local mother of three, is swimming in opportunities for this competition to wreak havoc on her relationships. With two teenagers and a preteen in little league and fast-pitch softball – and with one of her teens also knee-deep in SAT/ACT prep and testing – she sees it everywhere: “In sports, the classroom, with kids’ grades, honor roll, and who’s taken out to eat with the principal (at Edwardsburg High School).” Feed this beast of childhood achievement, set it free in society and what do we have?A need for our children to be great-notjust-good at sports, music, academics – you name it. Dr. John Petersen of Family Psychology of South Bend says, “This ambition can cause us to turn on each other; i.e., if I’m not sure I’m doing well enough, at least I can know I’m doing better than them.” Dr. Petersen states that these feelings of competition are generally inherent in every mother. “Children’s behavior and 68 MI CHILD MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

achievements can have more impact on the sense of worth as a mom.” In comparison with dads who provide for their families and can feel like they’ve done their part, he says, “Moms have to put food on the table and into bellies.” “Culturally a big challenge is that we are hugely ambitious in our parenting these days. We have a better appreciation of childhood as the formative years and on the influence of families,” Dr. Petersen explains. But this can actually be a negative when taken too far. He adds that smaller families exist, often with only one or two children. This increases the feeling that “we only have one or two chances to get it right.” This pressure can cause moms to lose focus on the values that are truly important. In some ways, Dr. Petersen says, psychology itself is the culprit.“We took research from cases of abuse and neglect, and we said those early years are important, and attachment is important.Then we extrapolated to healthy situations where good enough parenting should be the target.”

Just Good Enough?

While the term may sound like a copout, Dr. Petersen says, “good enough parenting” is actually a healthy goal. This consists of the various choices to love our children, not neglect or abuse them, and to provide for them. This certainly isn’t a copout, but can still feel vague, similar to an occupational concept called role ambiguity, where employees cannot do their jobs well if their role has not been defined. Where role ambiguity can cause a stressful job situation, “parenting ambiguity” is cause for much frustration and feeling of helplessness. When have we reached “good enough,” since there really is no set goal or ironclad rule to follow?

Certainly, there are concrete tips for dealing with some parenting issues, but much of it has to do with giving ourselves the permission to do things tailored to our families. Dr. Petersen suggests you evaluate your own standards, your benchmark for successful parenting. Is it health, happiness, enjoying the journey itself? Decide on the goal you want to strive for in your own life. Kanaby relates, “I don’t sit there and pay a lot of attention and say ‘is my daughter doing her best?’ But it’s always in the back of your mind; is there something we can do to help her become a better person, more confident in who she is?” The rule of thumb is to stay mindful and loving – don’t strive for perfection, whatever that even looks like.

The Other Mother

So what about when it’s another mom who seems to be deep in the throes of mompetition? Even if you hadn’t been particularly self-conscious about your kids, a heavy dose of another kids’ achievements can leave you feeling the need to level the playing field with your own children’s success.

You can also “give her the victory,” Dr. Petersen says.Beat her to the punch by acknowledging her child’s accomplishments first. Tell her you are happy for her that her children are doing so well. Or, you could try the paradoxical approach by highlighting your child’s below-average quality in that area (when your child is not around to hear you).This can take the wind out of her sales. If you preface her bragging with your own realistic view that your kid isn’t great at math, football, gymnastics – and the clincher is, you’re fine with that – she won’t have as much triumph in bragging. As a last resort, though, sometimes a quiet departure from the relationship is the best choice. Kanaby says,“I’ve had a budding friendship where this lady was just so competitive, it made me not want to be around her, so I distanced myself from her.”

The Bottom Line

“Each child is designed by God, and all are different,” Hall says. Really, the same can be said for moms. If you build relationships by offering and accepting support and encouragement, you’ll end up with what moms really need – camaraderie, not a contest.

Dr. Petersen suggests that the best way to preempt this attack is to have those standards set for yourself as a parent. If you already have a clear idea of what is good enough for you, “then the competitive other mom is still annoying, but it doesn’t have to be hurtful,” he says. It takes some pressure off when you are trying to live up to your own goals, not someone else’s.

Stephanie Graham and her husband have been married six years and have a hilarious 16-month-old son. She has been freelancing for eight years and loves to write about the most important privileges in life – parenting and family.

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MI CHILD MAGAZINE | MAY 2012

Big Kids M i C H I L D â&#x20AC;˘ S P E C I A L PA R E N T I N G F E AT U R E S E C T I O N

Why Wait? The importance of saving some good stuff for later

By Michelle Wegner

70 MI CHILD MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

I bought some expensive jeans this month. Really expensive. I still feel slightly guilty about it, but I waited a long time until I was able to get them on sale. I had a little extra spending money, and I was in desperate need of a new pair – especially a pair with sparkly roses – so I caved in to my inner diva and bought them. One of my children, who shall remain nameless, saw my jeans and declared them “unfair.” This daughter insisted that she needed the same brand of expensive jeans with sparkly roses on the pockets, too – since every single pair of hers were suddenly too small and outdated. My answer: No. I waited until I was almost 38 years old to get these jeans. You can wait awhile longer, too. Both our older girls have been begging us for an iPhone. I tell them repeatedly that I was the last person in the Western hemisphere to get a cell phone. I was 33 years old before I even got one, and 37 before I got an iPhone. The combined ages of all three of my girls don’t even total up to my current age, so again, my answer to their pleas? Wait. A long time. With all that said, guess what? Our 8-year-old has an iPhone. Not one that works to make phone calls, but it functions as an iPod Touch. I’ll take a step back while you throw rocks and garbage and mock my hypocrisy. Allow me to explain. Our girls have always enjoyed learning games on various handheld electronic devices. We’ve had all the Leap Frog toys, Nintendo DS’s, DSI’s, V-tech toys, you name it. With each game, we have spent close to $100 per device (or more). These toys always serve an educational purpose, and even more important to my sanity, a distraction device from hitting, biting and punching each other on long car rides to Grandma’s or vacation. Quickly we found that these toys add up to some serious cash spent. Along with the cash spent, we found the girls outgrowing and outsmarting the games in a few short months. (Being the smart parents that we are, it took us about 10 years to figure that out). So, this past Christmas, we found an old 3G iPhone on Craigslist for cheaper than an iTouch, and way cheaper than a smart educational toy that we had first considered for Belle. On her new device, she has endless educational games, the ability to take photos like her big sisters, and she can use it to listen to stories before bed. (You can keep throwing rocks and garbage at me; I don’t mind). When she opened her gift on Christmas morning, she was completely shocked. She kept repeating over and over, “I never thought I would have an iTouch!” Her joy made us all giggle and really made us proud as parents. It was a worthwhile investment for us and has served its purpose well.

If there is a special item our girls long for, and we know either we cannot afford it or the timing just isn’t right, these are suggestions we offer them:

Work for it

Our front door is a revolving door of children, both our own and random extras, always wanting food and messing up my house. One way I tell my girls they can make some extra money toward their goal is by cleaning up after these blessed friends. The most despised job across the board at our house is folding socks. With three young girls, myself and my husband, the volume of socks that need to be matched and folded every week is truly astonishing. This is a high-paying job that I’d quickly pay anyone else to do since I despise it so much. There are always extra jobs like these that will pay cold hard cash at our house.

Save for it

From the time our girls could understand the concept of money, we have taught them to save. Each child has a piggy bank with a section for Savings, Spending, and Church. They save 10%, give 10% to church and have 80% of their allowance left to spend as they wish. We emphasize the “Savings” category is to be used for big ticket items such as a designer pair of jeans Mom is never going to buy them.

Wait For It

Your kids should know how awesome you are by now. Haven’t you always surprised them with amazing gifts in the past? I know we have. We’ve purposely hung on to a gift we could give them until the time and the place were right. By making them wait, hopefully our kids have learned to trust us a little with their wishes and dreams. Waiting also has the positive benefit of finding something at just the right price. We have taught our girls to shop the sales after Christmas or holidays to show them how sometimes by waiting they can make their money go twice as far.

Go For It

There are times that necessitate gifts for no good reason at all. Giving is part of the joy of life, and surprising your kids with extraordinary love wrapped in a gift can be an amazing thing. Go for it. Surprise them from time to time – as long as they don’t learn to expect it. In giving to them, they are learning both the gift of giving and receiving, two very important life lessons. And finally...

Table It

Occasionally when we have the money and the situation is right, we might do something crazy and buy an iTouch for an 8-year-old. We say yes because we love our kids.

You are the one in charge. You can do it. Say no when you have to. Your kids might be angry, hurt or upset for a while, but you are older than them and obviously have more life experience. You’ve known them longer than anyone, and you know what’s best for them. Sometimes the best thing is just to say no and leave it at that. You are the adult, and you don’t even need to explain yourself!

Wanting nice things is not bad. Wanting to give your kids nice things stems out of our love for them and desire to make them happy. Of course that’s not bad!

My biggest piece of advice after everything I’ve said is this: If you buy yourself an expensive pair of jeans, hide the receipts and do not by any means disclose the price you paid to your children.

Unfortunately, with our best intentions being what they are, the constant act of giving a child what he or she does not have the capacity to appreciate leads to an aloof attitude from the child and almost an attitude of “I deserve this.”

Michelle Wegner is a wife, mom, freelance writer, and author of the book “Share the Well,” stories about life in Southern India. She and her husband Rob have been married for 19 years and enjoy living in Granger with their three delightfully spirited girls, Maddie 13, Whitney 12, and Isabelle 8. MI CHILD MAGAZINE | MAY 2012

M i C H I L D â&#x20AC;˘ S P E C I A L PA R E N T I N G F E AT U R E S E C T I O N

P lay Dates

Open a book, Zumba for a fabulous cause, jive to some live music or take the weekend and hit the fair: no matter what your speed, there are some fantastic events happening this June for you and your little ones!

72 MI CHILD MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Hit the Books – And Win Stuff! Don’t let those little brains turn to swimming pools of mush this summer. There are plenty of ways to encourage your kids to drop the gaming controller and pick up a book, like the fabulous children’s and young adults reading program through the Mishawaka-PennHarris Library. From June 1st to July 31st, kids can read to earn prizes just by recording the time spent reading or listening to library materials. Program highlights include a visit by Ronald McDonald, the Snite Museum of Art, a show by The ROZ Puppets, and “Abracadabra Magic” presented by Magician Kevin Wilson. This program is sure to be a great way to inspire reading in your home. Complete details for all programs will be available at each library location.

Zumba and Walk for A Great Cause

Did you know that Relay for Life of Elkhart County will be having their event Saturday, June 16-17? Relay for Life is an overnight fundraising event from the American Cancer Society where individuals on teams take turns making their way around the track in support of cancer survivors and their caregivers. There’s food, games and entertainment as well, so be sure to check it out at relayforlife.org! But there are other ways to support Relay for Life, too, and they require you to shake your booty, which is always a plus. You can Zumba for the cause! On Saturday, June 9, Star Martial Arts in Elkhart is hosting a Zumbathon to benefit Relay for Life. From 6 to 8:30 PM, get your groove on, all in the name of fighting cancer! Tickets are $15 at the door. Advanced tickets are only $10. If you’re interested in learning more, call 574.361.5172.

Your Friday Live Music Fix

We can’t think of a better way to enjoy a Friday lunch with the family: Fridays by the Fountain is back starting June 15 and lasting till the end of August. Head on over to the Jon R. Hunt Plaza at The Morris each Friday from 11:45 AM to 1:15 PM for lunch, and you’ll be treated to a free live concert from great performers (check out morriscenter.org to learn more about the acts). The concerts are free and open to the public. And best yet, downtown restaurants contract to sell food and offer a variety of favorites including pizza and sandwiches, but you can totally brown bag it as well. Tables are also set in and around the plaza, so you and the kids have a space to eat, but we like the idea of bringing a big blanket for the lawn! It’s a great way to get in the swing of summer, and that’s music to our ears!

The Fair!

It’s most every kid’s favorite part about summer: The fair. The oh-so-sugaryI-can’t-believe-I’m-letting-you-eatthat fair foods, the sights, the games, the rides, the promise of endless entertainment, it’s a kids paradise. And after all that reading you’ve suckered your kids into doing for the summer (read our first event entry), don’t they deserve a break to let loose outside the house? The St. Joseph County 4H Fair comes to our area from June 29 to July 7, and it’s bringing with it a whole host of activities your kids will go ga-ga over, like a laser show, fireworks, and tons of fun demonstrations and performances. General admission at the gate is $8. And children 8 and under get in free. Enjoy a special rate of $4 on July 4th! There will be countless things to do, so for more info and a listing of all the great activities, visit 4hfair.com and treat your kids with a trip to the fair. Your kids will thank you…after they come down from the sugar rush.

MI CHILD MAGAZINE | MAY 2012

Thank You!

to our Annual Advertising

Magazine Partners

who support FAMILY and our Magazine every single month! These annual advertising partners make it possible to produce this magazine and offer it for free to Michiana Families. Please support these local partners in Michiana! Elkhart General Hospital South Bend Clinic Midwest Orthotics Notre Dame Federal Credit Union MutualBank Once Upon a Child Menno Travel Gymnastics Michiana Early Childhood Development Center at Notre Dame South Bend Medical Foundation

74 THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

Advertiser Index: 32 Pearls Family Dentistry

Lakeland HealthCare

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Classic Image Photography

March of Dimes

College Football Hall of Fame

Mathnasium

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Momadvice.com

Creekstone Properties ADV

Notre Dame Federal Credit Union

DTSB, Inc.

Novabella Inc.

Once Upon a Child

Elkhart General

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Eye Site Optical

Premier Arts

Goodwill Industries

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Sawyer Home and Garden Center

Grace Community Church

South Bend Clinic

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www.lakelandhealth.org THE FAMILY MAGAZINE | JUNE 2012

For Women Only welcomes Board Certified Obstetrician and Gynecologist Michael D. Engel, DO For Women Only offers gynecologic exams, obstetrics, reproductive analysis, endometriosis, gynecologic surgery, prenatal and postpartum care, labor and delivery management, hormone replacement therapies, family planning and health consultations.

Dr. Engel and For Women Only are accepting new patients. To schedule an appointment, call 574-293-2893.

1215 Lawn Avenue, Suite 100 â&#x20AC;˘ Elkhart, IN 46514