what “In life, you do not have to do anything. It’s all a question of what you are being.” – Neale Donald Walsch
the soul’s journey • with dixie clark
whatareyouseeking? As we move forward in our personal and spiritual evolution, it is helpful to
go beyond the surface of our actions, and move into a greater awareness of what we are truly seeking in life.
We are often driven by core values or inner experiences that may have little to do with what it looks like on the surface. Often the most seemingly insignificant goal or behavior is connected to a deeper longing within us. We have been conditioned to believe that our keys to fulfillment, loving, and abundance come from outside of ourselves; that we have to do or possess certain things in order for us to attain them. Or, that we must have approval, attention, or achievement in order to be worthy, okay, or safe. So, we go about doing and seeking other things as the way to have these inner experiences. We may hear ourselves say, “when I lose weight, get into a relationship, or make more money,” then I’ll be (okay, safe, worthy, loveable, etc).
“If I could really get you to understand that you are the source individually of all things around you, you would have the knowledge necessary for your life to come abundantly to you.” - John-Roger, D.S.S. If they don’t come about in the way we expect, we often go into judgement of ourselves, the other person, or the situation. As a result, we may get discouraged and believe we’re not worthy. We may even increase these seeking behaviors, almost out of a sense of desperation, in order to have this inner experience. Another way of understanding what we’re truly seeking is by looking at behaviors we do over and over again that we’re not happy about. Behind even our most frustrating or selfdestructive patterns of behavior, there is a positive intention. This means that there is a part of us that wants something from ourselves or for ourselves with this behavior, and it is doing the only thing it knows how in order to get it. Let’s suppose when we were age three, we learned that if we threw a tantrum, we got what we wanted, felt in control, or got people to listen to us.
SOUND FAMILIAR? Some people never grow out of this, and this pattern becomes conditioned into their unconscious and is triggered whenever they feel helpless or not heard. So, in that moment, they become that three-year-old (seeking to be heard and to feel in control) engaging threeyear-old tactics to get needs met. Just so we don’t get into judgment of “those people”, we all operate from areas of our unconscious more often than we realize. We all get triggered into unresourceful patterns. Maybe it’s procrastination, addictions, taking responsibility for others, controlling, etc.– behaviors which we swear we’re never going to repeat, and yet we do so again and again. Then we enter into judgment of ourselves which actually locks us into these patterns! Instead of judging or shaming ourselves, the more effective and loving thing to do is to understand the original positive intent behind the behavior and to adopt new patterns that are more aligned with that intention.
WHAT IS THE POSITIVE INTENTION which the part that creates this behavior is seeking? There is a process in neuro linguistic programming (NLP) called Core Transformation. In this process, the practitioner helps the person identify the core value by asking, “And what will having that or doing that get for you that’s even better?” This question is repeated over and over until the person gets to the core value of this behavior or outcome, and is able to experience it fully. The original limiting behavior or belief can then begin to be transformed thereby allowing that desired, inner experience to be attained directly. In both cases, whether it’s outcomes we want or behaviors we want to avoid, we can begin to go to a deeper level of awareness in order to transform our lives, and open up to what has been there all along. We can ask ourselves, “What will having this or doing this get for me that’s even better?” When we move through the layers of what it is we’re seeking, we can “cut out the middle man” and move right into that experience. We are then going through life from a place of wholeness, attracting people and situations from that inner experience, instead of seeking these things from a place of lacking. On one level we seek love, acceptance, and validation to feel that we’re okay. We often seek this love and sense of being okay from people and situations outside of ourselves. However, on the Soul level, we know we already are okay. We know that we have all that we’re seeking. We are intrinsically Divine. The Soul remembers and keeps that memory alive within us, bringing forward experiences to help us awaken. What would it be like if we allowed ourselves to just “Be” in each situation, if we let ourselves be the Love and Joy that we’re seeking, to know that our sense of safety comes from within, and that who we truly are is not defined by what we do or possess? What would it be like to take the next step into whatever Spirit has placed in front of us from a place of Soul awareness? m
Dixie Clark, MS, MSS, LPC is Director and co-founder of Morning Star Center, a holistic wellness center. A licensed counselor and ordained minister, she holds a masters’ degree in both counseling and spiritual science and is currently obtaining her doctorate in spiritual science. With over 26 years experience in mind/body therapies, she combines psychology and spirituality to help people release emotional blocks, heal past trauma and change limiting beliefs to open to soul awareness.
dixie clark, ms, mss, lpc | www.morningstarcenter.com | www.dixieclark.com 27
metroMAgAzine • Aug 2010