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n a previous life I was hectored into attending a team building workshop with my ad exec colleagues. You know: trust exercises, visions for the future, pushing of envelopes, that sort of thing. Ghastly. We were asked to bring an item that, to us, represented ‘challenges overcome’. One person brought their running trainers, another brought a picture of her son’s graduation, one guy brought the complete works of Proust (he’d finished it). I took a packet of cauliflower seeds. Because, to me, the cauliflower is the kitchen gardener’s greatest challenge. Fiendishly difficult to grow, it requires skill, a lot of space (each plant needs minimum ½ m², ideally 1m²) and at least six months in the ground. And they are tricksy, stubborn little buggers. If you have the wrong soil pH they will be stunted. If you don’t cover the crowns they will brown. If you don’t net them they will be ravaged by aphids or cabbage whites. Heck, if you don’t look at them nicely every Tuesday they will have a paddy. And yet the cauliflower is one of the cheapest and most unloved veg harvested in the UK. They cost barely a quid, perhaps two for an organic one. But still, one cauliflower will feed two gluttons and three – if not four – modest eaters. One pound! For all that space, time and effort. And, until recently, all we ever did is sling some cheese sauce on them. We, as a nation, have ventured beyond cauliflower cheese in the past year, but still, it’s a miracle cauliflower farmers stay in business. All hail the cauliflower growers of Great Britain, then, for you have a thankless task – and a tough one, too. I salute you. I do not grow cauliflowers. Unsurprisingly. I’m fully prepared to admit that my skill does not extend that far, and I’m delighted that – in my failing – I am able to support the heroic cauli’ farmers of the UK by purchasing my cauliflowers instead.
Kathy is a supper club host and cookery teacher. She writes the food blog Gluts & Gluttony about the gluts she gets from her veg patch and the ensuing gluttony in the kitchen. You can sign up to the blog at glutsandgluttony. com, or follow her on Twitter and Instagram @gluts_gluttony for more seasonal recipes.
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PERSIAN(ISH) CAULIFLOWER RICE SERVES 2
Cauliflower rice is fast becoming the next avocado on toast. Or, worse, the next courgetti. I do not claim this tastes ‘just like’ rice/pasta/couscous or whatever today’s apparently evil carbohydrate is. But it’s tasty in its own right. I love this dish on its own, but it’s perfect with ras-el-hanout roast chicken or spicy prawns. INGREDIENTS 1 tbsp barberries (or dried cranberries, if you can’t find them) pinch of saffron 1 tbsp olive oil ½ cauliflower seeds of 4 cardamom pods pinch of salt 4 dried apricots, finely chopped 2 tbsp pumpkin seeds a few pomegranate seeds METHOD 1 Soak the barberries in a little bowl of hot water for 10 minutes. 2 Pop the saffron in a small bowl and mix with 1 tbsp hot water. Set aside for a few minutes to infuse. 3 Chop the cauliflower into rough chunks and blitz in a food processor until it resembles coarse breadcrumbs. 4 Now you’re ready to bring it all together. Heat the oil in a large non-stick frying pan and, once hot, tip in the cauliflower and give it a muddle around the pan. Add the saffron with its water, cardamom, barberries (drained), apricots, pumpkin seeds and a good pinch of salt. Cook for 4-6 minutes until just cooked. Keep everything moving in the pan so it doesn’t brown, and check the seasoning whilst it cooks. 5 Scatter with something appropriate – pomegranate seeds, coriander, pistachios, flaked almonds, that sort of thing – and serve warm.
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