Holiday 2011

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M

TABLE of contents on the cover

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PUBLISHER/OWNER Jim Muir

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From the Publisher

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Sarah-Dippity

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Carnegie Library

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Parenting

dancing with artstarts

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Stephanie Milligan

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PHOTOGRAPHER Ceasar Maragni Labor of Love

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Holiday of Homes tour Stepping UP

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Harry Boyd Lila H. Colloton Don Gasaway Ceasar Maragni Jim Muir Jon Musgrave Bernie Paul Dixie Terry George Trammell Cindy Gunnin For more information regarding Marion Living call Jim at 618-525-4744.

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MARION LIVING FROM THE PUBLISHER Nov e m b e r - D e c e m b e r 2 0 1 1

For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. Luke 2:11

The staff of High Road Publications would like to take this opportunity to wish all our faithful advertisers and loyal readers a very Merry Christmas and a Happy and Prosperous New Year! May the joy and excitement of the holiday season be felt by you throughout the coming New Year. Don’t forget that Jesus is the Reason for the Season! God Bless You! Jim Muir Owner, Publisher High Road Publications Holidays 2011 • www.marionlivingmag.com • 5

Gary Direnfeld Advice on Parenting All I want for Christmas is for my parents to get along.... It’s time for the annual holiday debacle. I’m not talking bad Christmas gifts; I’m talking high conflict separated parents duking it out over when to exchange the kids come Christmas Day. Every year, same old fight with kids caught in the middle. As other kids are dreaming and scheming about their Christmas booty, kids of high conflict separated parents are embroiled as emissaries taking contentious emotion laden messages back and forth between their parents to sort out exchange time. They are exposed to the toxic animosity and bad mouthing of one parent against the other. These same kids have to reconcile their own worth, knowing they are half of each parent and given each parent portrays the other as bad, they extract the meaning that they are therefore entirely bad, being composed of both parents. This view of self carries them to adolescence where they give up on a reasonable life in favor of early onset sexual behavior, drugs and crime as they assuage their poor feelings of self worth. Further, If the parents cannot reach a consensus on how to divvy up Christmas Day, then by default the one with the kids from Christmas Eve has control of their release or until the police arrive thus turning Christmas into a criminal activity and total embarrassment for the children. What a despicable tradition. And what of these children come adulthood? Firstly, these children often seek to have nothing to do with either parent on Christmas when they are of an age to control their destiny. Secondly, with their parents as role models, as much as they may try to do things differently, they all too 6 • marion living magazine • Holidays 2011

often find themselves in the very predicament they swore they would never be a party to. Misery begets misery. If you are a separated parent in a high conflict situation, there are other solutions to duking it out with your ex. Rather than running to Court, each advising of the shortcomings of the other, consider alternate strategies for conflict resolution such as mediation or collaborative law. Regardless of mediation or collaborative law or negotiating on your own, then consider how rigid you truly need to be with respect to holding out for your preferred outcome. Did you know, low conflict separated parents have figured out that kids don’t really need to see both parents on Christmas Day! Indeed, some parents switch off on Boxing Day on an alternate year basis and some even elect to have the kids every Boxing Day. From the child’s perspective, those parents who settle their dispute typically with one being very flexible, get to enjoy a conflict free Christmas with traditions special to their circumstance. Given they no longer have to worry about the parental conflict, they are then free to dream and scheme about their Christmas booty just like the other kids. As these kids age, and they will, they come to see the differences between their parents. They come to understand who the instigator was and who was reasonable. Come their adulthood, they are more apt to choose the reasonable parent over the one observed to make life miserable. The parent who was flexible has a greater chance of a life-long relationship with their children over the parent who was seen to create conflict. This year, if you are a separated parent in a high conflict situation, give your child the gift they truly deserve, peace on earth and goodwill towards all. Settle your dispute in the favor of your kids versus your preferred outcome. Freedom from conflict will last a lifetime, the electronics, maybe a year. (Gary Direnfeld, MSW, RSW is a social worker in private practice and an expert of providing an opinion on a parenting plan. Known throughout Canada and the United States, people regularly travel distances to see Gary for his unique approach to counseling. Visit his website at www. yoursocialworker.com.

MARION CARNEGIE LIBRARY

Odds & Ends

UPCOMING EVENTS

Regular Events

Elder Law Monday, December 5 • 6 p.m. Elder law specialist Tiffanny Sievers will explain the DRA law (Deficit Reduction Act of 2005) that is now in effect in Illinois. The law affects citizens 65 years of age and older who need Medicaid assistance. Visit from Santa Claus Tuesday, December 6 3 to 5:30 p.m. Santa Claus will pay a visit to the library. Bring your camera for photos with the kids! Light refreshments will be served. Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program Monday, December 12 9 a.m. to 12 p.m. The St. Louis Area Foodbank will have a representative available to assist with completing a SNAP (food stamp) application and/or to

answer questions regarding the application process or potential benefits. Informational material on SNAP will also be available. Open to the public. The Bells of St. Mary’s Thursday, December 22 • 2 p.m. Bing Crosby and Ingrid Bergman star in this 1945 movie about Father O’Malley, the unconventional priest from Going My Way, who continues his work for the Catholic Church. This time he is sent to St. Mary’s, a rundown parochial school on the verge of condemnation. He and Sister Benedict work together in an attempt to save the school, though their differing methods often lead to good-natured disagreements. Approved for general audiences. Southern Illinois Fit Club Thursdays • 5:30 p.m. (except Wednesday, December 7) Meets at Marion Carnegie

Lego Club • First and Third Monday • 6 to 7:30 p.m. Come to the Children’s Department for a fun-filled evening of Legos. Anime Night • First Wednesday • 6 p.m. Open to ages 18+. Games Group • Tuesdays • 4 p.m. Open to teens of all skill levels. Games include chess, checkers, Go. Storyhour • Wednesdays • 10 a.m. Stories, snacks and activities for pre-school age children. Saturday Teen Games • Second Saturday • 1 p.m. Open to teens.

All programs are free and open to the public.

Library. Free and open to everyone. Visit www.soilfitclub.com for more information. Beginning Tai Chi Mondays • 9 a.m. to 10 a.m. The class is free of charge and open to the public. It meets every Monday that the library is open. Holiday December 24 and 26 The library will be closed. Visit us at www.marioncarnegielibrary.org.

Carnegie Commons

Marion Carnegie Library’s coffee bar, Carnegie Commons, is open! The coffee bar is located on the library’s main floor. Carnegie Commons hours are Monday through Friday from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. The bar features lemonade, cappuccino, coffee, tea, hot chocolate and snacks. Prices range from $.50 to $1.

206 S. Market • 993-5935 • www.marioncarnegielibrary.org Hours: Monday-Thursday 9 a.m. to 8 p.m. • Friday and Saturday 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Holidays 2011 • www.marionlivingmag.com • 7

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Sarah-Dippity

The point of view of a Marion native who is a freshman in college by Sarah Anderson

What is a good education?

I asked this question to my family and the conversation became a twist on the ‘nature versus nurture’ argument. The dialogue changed from the type of teacher, to environment, Yale to JALC, and finally with the example of “The Dead Poets Society.” After analyzing my courses at JALC I realized that what had changed was not so much the curriculum; I am learning the same information as I did in high school, and the same information is being taught at much more prestigious schools. So what is lacking in college and what is this sense of longing I have for my years at Marion High? The only variable is the teachers. As I am sure many have experienced, teaching to a group of students that you will only have for a small number of weeks, and every other day, is very different from teaching a group of students everyday for a whole year, and possibly many years to come. While the education at JALC is good I can not help but to remember the one-on-one relationship I had with my teachers at high school. True, there are many valid reasons for this difference, but nonetheless, I do miss it. Finding a “good” teacher is difficult, and is becoming increasingly impossible. With the combination of salary cuts, middle-class lifestyles, and students unwilling to be taught, the appeal of teaching is zero. Those who do not love their job do not teach in an interesting way, making their job even more of a headache. However, there are those teachers who love the subject they are teaching and are deeply concerned with helping their students. They breathe life into the dusty, duct-tapedtogether books. And I am pleased to say that Marion High School has many of these teachers. As the state economy is worsening, our schools are suffering. I work at a local elementary school and was advised to only use materials as needed, because for the foreseeable future, this is all that will be provided. With this struggle, it is interesting to see many surrounding towns building new schools and receiving grants. I was thrilled learning that Marion

would be building a new high school. However, those blueprints might as well have never existed. After recent lawsuits and legal struggles with the Marion School District, the new high school will not be built. The high school is in abundance of the first key for a good education, but is poorly lacking in the second – environment. The school is outdated. There is only one computer lab for the whole school accompanied with a small library. The cafeteria is overflowing with students, so much so that an additional makeshift cafeteria had to be made. The hallways are extremely overcrowded, making many students walk outside to get to their classes. Because of this, all of the doors surrounding the classes are unlocked during school hours, creating a very unsafe environment for the students. In addition to the loss of the prospect of the new school, now the school must look for ways to save money, which means possibly not replacing teachers that retire or otherwise leave the school. With fewer teachers, the class sizes must increase. This makes the environment less conducive for learning. A student will not pay attention with a large class of misbehaving peers. This also puts in jeopardy for the thing I took for granted, the personal attention in the classroom. With larger class sizes, the teacher does not have the time to care for the needs of the students or expand the topic. The only time allowed for is the outlined curriculum. The classes become college-ized. And this is not beneficial for learning the basics. The solution to all of this is invisible; I personally do not believe there is a quick fix. As a community, it is obvious that much emphasis is placed on receiving the best education possible. Many advance placement courses, electives, such as foreign language, automotive, several art classes, cooking, and sewing, and extracurricular activities are offered. These impressive classes would not matter if it were not for the amazing teachers that taught them. Everyone is struggling economically. However, do not take it out on the students. Push the legal mumbojumbo aside and focus on ways to get around this road block. Let us make sure that Marion children will receive not only a ‘good’ education, but one that will be remembered forever. Holidays 2011 • www.marionlivingmag.com • 9

Dancing with Artstarts

Production director Cindy Hunt said this year’s 5th annual event was the best yet.

“The response again this year was fabulous and we’re already thinking ahead to next year.” Held at Marion Cultural & Civic Center, Hunt said this year’s extravaganza was all about “Glee” with the gala event benefiting 10 local charities. Entertainment by Southern Illinois youth, dignitaries, and fun surprises made this a very special evening for everyone in attendance.

Artstarts Company was back with their 2011 megafundraiser and music and dance extravaganza – an event that raised $105,000 for the designated charities.

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Each charity had dancers ‘competing’ in two dances. Audience members voted for their favorite dancer/charity with their dollars. Over 75 local kids provided entertainment in between dance sets. The event’s major sponsors were: Title Sponsor: The Pediatric Group; lights and sound - Klein and Cook Orthodontist and choreography sponsor Heartland Regional Medical Center. Hunt said that this year’s People’s Choice Award was won by the group dancing for

Story by Jim Muir Photos by Ceasar Maragni

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Page 10 Top: Dancing on behalf of Williamson County Child Advocacy Center, Danny and Maribeth Kaye practiced a step backstage just minutes before taking their turn before the judges. Bottom: Dozens of talented area youngsters presented their own version of “Glee” recently at the Marion Civic Center as part of Dancing with Artstarts. Page 11 Top: Artstarts dancers come in all ages and this little lady showed that she could keep up with the bigger girls. Bottom: Artstarts Executive Director Cindy Hunt praises cast members. This page Bottom: Dancer Macy Russell quietly rehearsed in the south lobby hallway at Marion Cultural and Civic Center before taking the stage. Page 13 Top: Jared Garrison and Janell Kobler perfect their dance during final rehearsals for the show.

Lifesavers Training Corporation and the Judges’ Choice Award went to those dancing for Night’s Shield Children’s Shelter. The participants and the charity they danced for were: Lifesavers Training Corporation Devin Wade – Arabesque Dance Studio and Lifesavers Dance Troupe Artstarts Singers-Soloists, Laura Pound and Kate Miller Williamson County Child Advocacy Center – Daniel Kay and Maribeth Kay – Soloists Graham Gordon and Spencer Gualdoni Night’s Shield Children’s Shelter – Jared Garrison and Janell Kobler – Abbi Mayfield and Paxton Griffith – Logan Hunt on drums, Vinny Segretario, soloist Children’s Miracle Network Hospital – Hannah Smith and Lawrence O’Neill Alzheimer’s Association-Greater Illinois Chapter – Angie Fisher and Tim Wessel

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Family Crisis Center Homeless Shelter – Macy Russell, Jeni Miller Habitat for Humanity – Marion High School Cheerleaders Good Samaritan Ministries – Susan Barnes Dance Studio Hospice of Southern Illinois – Jan Bowman-Marsh and Mandy Marsh Gumdrops – Clint Misselhorn and Juli Ingram

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Labor

of

Love

Volunteerism and a helping hand from the public is the driving force behind the Marion Regional Humane Society

Perhaps the best way to describe the Marion Regional Humane Society is to label it ‘a labor of love.’ Located seven miles south of the Route 148/Route 13 intersection, the non-profit facility is a no-kill shelter that operates solely on the goodness of donations and the dedication of volunteer workers such as Tiffany Ellis who works/donates 32-35 hours per week. Ellis, of Marion, has volunteered at the humane shelter for more than four years. “We take in cats, small dogs and my role is cleaning and helping taking care of the animals,” said Ellis. “We don’t have dog runs so we are limited to taking only small dogs. We keep animals until we can adopt them out or until we can send them to another no-kill facility to be adopted out.”

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Ellis said funding comes solely through donations. “That’s our only funding source so we really rely on the generosity of the public and from animal lovers,” said Ellis. Built in 2007 the facility has approximately 15-20 volunteers that donate time each week. It was constructed as a pole barn-type Story by Jim Muir Photos by Ceasar Maragni

“Probably three-fourths of the animals we get are strays and the rest are animals that we get from people that have to move or from people that pass away. It’s a very nice facility and it’s very rewarding work. Everybody that volunteers here feels that way.” – Tiffany Ellis, volunteer at Marion Regional Humane Society –

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facility that has been petitioned off and now has heating, cooling and running water. Ellis has been there since the beginning and has seen the number of animals increase through the years. “Probably three-fourths of the animals we get are strays and the rest are animals that we get from people that have to move or from people that pass away,” said Ellis. “It’s a very nice facility and it’s very rewarding work. Everybody that volunteers here feels that way.” Ellis said some veterinarians in the region also donated services and reduced prices to help defray costs for animals that need medical attention. Anybody wanting to volunteer time or help with funding for the humane society can call 618-964-9999.

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HoLiday of Homes Tour The Marion Cultural and Civic Center Foundation hosted their Holiday Homes Tour recently and event chairwoman Claire Giles was pleased with the turnout despite inclement weather. “This year we had the wonderful older homes, the country home and the Dickens house, making this year’s tour very unique,” Giles said. First on the tour was Candy Lewis’ home on 301 East Allen Street. Her home was built in 1899 for the McLaren family. It was then passed on to the McAlpin family and then sold to Mrs. Lewis in 1992 by the Ashby family. This beautiful two story home features six fireplaces, many stained glass windows, ornate moldings and trim work and has been renovated by Mrs. Lewis. James and Pat Campbell’s home at 617 East Thorn was next. Known as “The Dickens House” it was built in the late 1920’s, this was a “Sears Design Home”. It was long occupied by the Tiller family and was sold to the Dennis Conley family and then to the Karl Conley family. The home was purchased in 1999 by Mr. Campbell for the sole purpose of displaying his extensive collection of porcelain miniature houses, buildings and other structures prevalent during the lifetime of Charles Dickens and Queen Victoria.

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Story and Photos by Ceasar Maragni

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Page 19 top: Steve Lawrence welcomed Home Tour visitors to his former horse barn home which he and wife Denise converted into their cozy country residence. Bottom: Visitors at times seemed amazed by the enormity of James Campbell’s Dickens Village which occupies nearly an entire floor of a Marion house. This page top: Once known as the Dennison home nearly a century ago, this 17 room home was moved from its original located on West Main Street to make way for the now demolished Marion Memorial Hospital in the 1950’s. Bottom: This majestic stairway in James and Stevie Bartley’s home at 812 North Market Street is striking in its design. Page 21: A large jester sits atop the holiday decorated fireplace in James and Stevie Bartley’s home. Page 22 Top: A large jester sits atop the holiday decorated fireplace in James and Stevie Bartley’s home. Bottom Left: Homeowner Stephanie Knight tells tour guests how she remodeled the kitchen area of her century old historic Marion home. Bottom Right: Red accessories help lend a truly festive holiday flavor to Jasone’s Bed & Breakfast and restaurant on West Main Street.

Campbell has collected them since 1992 and bought his first pieces in 1989,” James Campbell said. “The village is Dept 56, Dickens Village and it was started in 1984. They build just so many pieces each year and retired so many pieces each year. From 1992 back, I had to go to the secondary market to get the pieces I didn’t have.” He has all of the 251 houses in that issue and many accessories that he hasn’t even counted. James and Stevie Bartley’s home at 812 North Market was next on this year’s Holiday Homes Tour. The brick Victorian was built in 1875 by members of the Casey family. Samuel Casey, editor of the Marion Evening Post and Egyptian Press, purchased the home in 1907. One of the many treasures in the home is the beautiful stairway. The Bartleys purchased the home in early 2011 and have been busy redecorating. Stephanie Knight’s century old home was originally built on West Main Street and was known as the Dennison property. The home originally had a large fish pond in the back yard and was a showplace for the Dennison’s political friends. The 17 room home was moved to its present location at 908 West Cherry in the 1950’s to make room for the now demolished Marion Memorial Hospital. Holidays 2011 • www.marionlivingmag.com • 21

Jasone’s Bed & Breakfast and restaurant at 1414 West Main Street is owned and operated by Debbie Hayes. The elegant three story home was built in 1906 by W.J. Aikman, a real estate tycoon, bank vice-president and farm owner. In the 1970’s Wayland Sims purchased the home and made it into a showplace. Sims sold it to Heartland Regional Hospital who then sold it to Ms. Hayes in 2008. The country home of Steve and Denise Lawrence at 11067 Lemasters Road on Marion’s northwest side was originally built in 1960 was a 14 stall horse barn by Veterinarian Dr. Blakely. The Lawrences’ purchased the home and converted it into a stylish county home that contains a fireplace, dozens of Christmas trees of all sizes and Denise’s prized collection of snowmen. A working antique blue cook stove seems to always fascinate visitors.

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At Heartland Regional Medical Center E.R., less time waiting means less time worrying.

INTRODUCING THE 30-MINUTESOR-LESS E.R. SERVICE PLEDGE

Emergency medicine is about three things: compassion, skilled care and speed. You’ll find these at Heartland Regional Medical Center. The experienced E.R. physicians and the entire team are committed to working diligently to have you initially seen by a clinical professional* within 30 minutes of your arrival. If you need an E.R. fast, try our fast E.R. Once you do, you won’t want to go anywhere else. For more information, visit HeartlandRegional.com.

*Clinical professional is defined as a physician, physician assistant or nurse practitioner. If you are experiencing a medical emergency, call 911.

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Is available at these locations:

If you would like to be a distributor for Marion Living call 618-525-4744.

Golds Gym Bank of Marion Ideal Lawn & Tractor Marion Civic Center Hampton Inn Marion City Hall Quiznos Carnegie Library Subway Wm. Co. Senior Citizens CVS Marion Chamber of Commerce Marion Post Office Hospice of Southern Illinois Triple E BBQ 17th Street Bar & Grill EZ Auto Black Diamond H-D Days Inn Williamson County Tourism Econo Lodge Etcetera Valvoline Doug’s Lock and Key Walgreens Bennies Super 8 Adams Shoe Store Marion Office Center McDonalds (2 locations) Borowiak’s Medicine Shop Banterra Penn zoil Pit Road Racing NAPA Papa Murphy’s Bank of Herrin Motel 6 Comfort Suites Alltel Quality Inn Marion Health Care Holiday Inn Heartland Regional Medical America’s Best Inn Fifth Third Bank Drury Inn Applebees Country Inn Regions Fairfield Inn Gray Plaza Mid Country Bank Best One Tire US Bank Garden Gate Florists• 25 Holidays 2011 • www.marionlivingmag.com

Story and Photos by Ceasar Maragni

Stepping St. Joseph Catholic UP The Church’s youth group

saw a need nine years ago and stepped up to respond

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“The kids took ownership of the project right away and have done a great job with it ever since.” Tom Kadela, St. Joseph Catholic Church youth pastor – For the eighth Thanksgiving Day in a row, several dozen Marion young people spent the holiday away from the more traditional midday turkey day meal with family and friends, to roll up their sleeves and serve those less fortunate. Members of St. Joseph Catholic Church’s youth group got a real life lesson in Christ-like servitude by buying, cooking and serving over two-dozen turkeys and other dishes to nearly 100 hungry Marion residents at the Marion Ministerial Alliance headquarters. Youth pastor Tom Kadela said that when the young people in his church found out nine years ago that the Marion Ministerial Alliance Soup Kitchen was closed on Thanksgiving Day they decided that offering a free Thanksgiving dinner featuring baked turkey with all the trimmings at the facility would be a great local mission opportunity. “The kids took ownership of the project right away,” said Kadela, “and have done a great job with it ever since.” In addition to the young people, several Holidays 2011 • www.marionlivingmag.com • 27

adults and other Marion residents outside their church volunteer their time to help serve as well. The junior high and high school aged youth in the church solicit all the food in the fall in preparation for the annual meal. This year they cooked and served twenty-seven turkeys.

This page: St. Joseph Catholic Church Youth Pastor Tom Kadela brings out a fresh pan of turkey for the guests. Page 29 top: St. Joseph Catholic Church Youth Pastor Tom Kadela brings out a fresh pan of turkey for the guests. Bottom: St. Joseph Catholic Church Youth Pastor Tom Kadela brings out a fresh pan of turkey for the guests. Page 30: St. Joseph Catholic Church Youth Pastor Tom Kadela brings out a fresh pan of turkey for the guests. 28 • marion living magazine • Holidays 2011

Holidays 2011 • www.marionlivingmag.com • 29

This year’s dinner attracted over a hundred people. In case you’re wondering if the food tasted as good as it looks in the photos, one guest was quick to say, “It’s delicious! The turkey is so tender and just wonderful.� His broad smile alone was high praise for the youth group’s hard work.

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