Reminiscence by malvikamehra

Reminiscence A Journey through Three Generations S.G. Gopinath

Foreword by M. Arun Kumar

Arun Kumar has relished traversing many worlds. He and his wife, Poornima, now live in Mumbai, where he serves as Chairman and CEO of KPMG, India, They continue to maintain a home in the San Francisco Bay Area where they raised their two sons and lived for over three decades. They then moved to Washington, DC where he served in a senior position in President Obama’s administration. He has written two books on poetry; Plain Truths and Mantram Beach. He co-edited Kerala’s Economy: Crouching Tiger, Sacred Cows. Arun received a master’s degree from the Sloan School of Management, Massachusetts Institute of Technology, and a bachelor’s degree in physics from the University of Kerala. He studied at The Lawrence School, Lovedale.

Reminiscence A Journey through Three Generations

S.G. Gopinath

Foreword by M. Arun Kumar

Printed at Sudarsan Graphics Pvt. Ltd., Chennai Designed by Malvika Mehra

All rights reserved around the world. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form, electronic, mechanical or otherwise without the prior permission of the S.G. Gopinath For private circulation only

Reminiscence

We can’t control life, but we can control how we respond to life’s challenges. The answer lies in stabilizing the mind. Few human beings are born with the skill to weather storms and stress with grace. Yet everyone can learn. We can’t control the weather outside, but we can control how we respond. Like the Queen Mary we can install stabilizers in the mind. Strength in the Storm - Eknath Easwaran This book is dedicated to my wife, Beena. Without her stabilizing influence the family could not have navigated through life’s challenges

iii

Contents

Foreword vii Author’s Note viii SECTION 1 My Parents 1 SECTION 2 The Author’s Journey 121 SECTION 3 The Next Generation 263

Foreword

opi and I go back as far as our days as students in the Lawrence School, Lovedale, well over fifty years ago. The ethos of Lovedale is evident in so many places in his book, from the spirit of its motto, “Never Give In”, to a readiness for adventure.

Since leaving school, our lives went on quite different arcs that on occasion narrowly missed intersecting. I moved to the San Francisco Bay Area after Gopi had finished at Berkeley. While we both lived our lives far away from the Nilgiris, the blue mountains made their appearance in our lives in intriguing ways. Gopi, for instance, writes about visiting the Blue Mountain Meditation Center, established by Eknath Easwaran, some seventy miles north of where I made my home. My second book of poems, Mantram Beach, gets its title from a seashore there associated with Easwaran. As time went on, these arcs did indeed converge; we met in the Bay Area and have been in touch. The fascinating trajectory of Gopi’s life, since Lovedale, traverses Chennai (then Madras), Berkeley, San Francisco, Singapore, Southeast Asia and other places—even without considering travels around the world both on work and for pleasure. We get a quick view in the book of his range of interests, from engineering to freemasonry. We meet his friends, neighbors and colleagues as he takes us on an intimate journey spanning a panorama of eras, places and people. It is a voyage where we witness the milestones of his life and the variety of his experiences. The journey is captured with rich detail reminiscent of a period movie: we see pictures, letters, and e-mail communications. A reproduction of a hand-written letter from Venkat to his “dearest darling dad” speaks poignantly of the parent-child bond. Through it all, we see Gopi as a person exuding generosity and affection, who navigates life, from its beautiful moments to the heart-breaking tragedy of the loss of his son Venkat, with ineffable grace. We see Gopi as a caring husband to his wife Beena, a doting father, a responsible son, a gentleman in temperament. Gopi instinctively understands the many roles one is called upon to play in life, and he plays them with empathy. Gopi tells us, through his story, that significant moments of life are indeed the ones we all experience—birthdays, graduations, travels with family. His story reminds us to cherish those moments; indeed, it asks that we pause to do so in the rush of life. The book is enriched by endearing chapters from his daughters Rukmini and Rohini. Apples, as they say, do not fall far from the tree; Gopi has a loving family that embraces and enjoys life with the same degree of openness as he does. This is a lovingly compiled chronicle of a family that has in every generation shown a great interest in the world. Their story of curiosity, energy and love of family, friends and life has lessons for us all. M. Arun Kumar San Franscisco, USA vii

Author’s Note

am not a writer, but I enjoyed the journey of recording the history of my family with the hope that readers will understand the aspirations and achievements of each generation. This effort reactivated contacts with kin, friends and acquaintances, whose inputs have helped in making this book. Interactions with my Mother produced tender moments as she recalled events with tears of happiness or, on occasion, sadness. My father’s well preserved photo albums proved a treasure trove of memories. The Headmaster of the Lawrence School, Lovedale, Mr. Prabhakaran Nair, and the Alumini Coordinator, Old Lawrencian Sangeetha Jairam, helped me by giving permission to compile images to enhance write up of my days at school. A special mention for Mr. K.I. Thomas, Headmaster during my years in Lovedale (1958-1967), and his staff. He was a visionary, and an administrator par excellence, whose kind, yet stern, methods commanded universal respect. My thanks also to Mr. E.J. John, my English teacher at school, who allowed me to use his memoirs of his days in Lovedale. Technology and the internet made information gathering easy, which I have acknowledged. My thanks to owners of photos of Lovedale available in the social media, and to my friend and schoolmate, Mr. Arun Kumar, for having written the Foreword. I lay out a red carpet of gratitude to Jayashree Kumar, the copy editor, and Malvika Mehra, the book designer, whose help was immeasurable. Jayashree taught me how to cut the chaff off the core and stay relevant. Malvika sent me into a tizzy to ensure that her high standards of photographic quality and other requirements were met. My thanks to V. Sriram for having introduced me to her. Two books provided a lot of inspiration: 1) The autobiography of my uncle Dr. Potu Rao, who from humble beginnings carved a successful and illustrious career in medical research, working with Nobel laureates and being honoured in the Hall of Fame of the Anderson Memorial Hospital in Houston; and 2) Mission to Teach: The Life and Legacy of a Revolutionary Educator by Dipak Basu. I was inspired by my parents. My father helped build the defence infrastructure of India; he wanted the best for his family, with an emphasis on education; he was a hard task master to his children and a loving husband to my mother. My mother personified the adage, “Behind every successful man is a great woman.”; with grace and equanimity my mother coped with transfers that uprooted the family; all who came across her, from a humble postman to a General in the army, experienced her generosity, which saw no differences. viii

Reminiscence

During the writing of this book, most nations, including India (on 22 March 2020), suspended international and domestic travel to curtail the spread of the COVID-19 virus. India was in various degrees of lockdown for months after that. What better way to spend time during this period than by writing one’s memoirs. The famed Chennai historian, the late Mr. Muthiah, once said that each family has a story to tell and must document its history for posterity, the seed to his statement that was sown in 2008 finally grew into a reality. It is impossible to explain how the sudden loss of our young son to a freak accident affected our family. I was motivated by his admiration of William Ernest Henley’s “Invictus”, from which he quoted in his address as valedictorian of his class of 2013 at the Kogod School of Business, Washington D.C., “I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul.” Sathavalli Govindarajulu Gopinath (Gopi) (SGG) March 2021 Chennai, India

Reminiscence

SECTION 1

MY PARENTS

1. My Mother’s Family

2. My Father’s Family

3. Dad’s Story: The Beginning

4. Career: First Half, 1946-1967

5. Career: Second Half, 1967-1981

6. Life after Retirement

103

7. Reflections in the Mirror of Time

111

8. Tributes to my Parents

114

(Second wife)

Sathavalli Manavalswami Naidu

Andalamma (First wife)

Bangarswami Naidu

Vijayalakshmi Amma

Savithri Amma

Rajagopal Naidu Iravathi Ammal (second wife)

Govindarajulu 22-02-1948

Db: 28-09-1936

Geetha

Gopinath

Db: 15-09-1951

m: 29-06-1975

P. Ratna Rao Vandhana m

Venkatesh

Vipin

Bb: 07-02-1954

Rohini

Db: 23-07-1976

Baireddy Seshu

m: 04-04-2000

son of Dr. Krishnamurthy

Padmashree Ratnashree Shree

Viraj Krish Tummala Db: 13-06-2006

Rukmini

Db: 30-11-1978

m: 16-12-2007

Sudeep Suresh Db 20-01-1975

Alaina

Db: 24-06-2014

Venkatraj

Samara

Db: 13-06-2017

Db: 15-08-1983 Dd: 22-12-2015

Ramesh

Usha S

Padmaja

Leela

Sujatha

Vivek

Madhumathi

Dharmesh m

S Shriram

Manasa

D Vaishanavi S Varun

Saikishore

Sanjeev Srinivasan Latha

Sujatha

D Esha

Beena

Krishnamagaru S Srinivasan

Samyuktha

Narendran

Lalitha

Db: 14-03-1923 Dd: 22-07-2007

Tanuj Teja

D Shreya D

GOPINATH’S PATERNAL FAMILY S

Jayalakshmi Ammal (First wife)

Sathavalli Manavalswamy Perumalswamy S

Ramachandran

Saraswathy Ammal

m Inti Muniswamy Naidu

Jayalakshmi Ammal Bhaskar

Krishna Bai

Lalitha

Srinivas

Jayalakshmi Gowri

M. Jayaram Nayudu Raghuram Satish

Venkatnarayana

Dwarak

Leelendra Sriram

Sujaya

Dakshita Jayakumar m

Parvathy Amma

Tulsiamma

Vasantha

Leela

Deepavathi

Gopalratnam m

Siddhivardhana

Chiranjeet

Auvula Jeevarathnam Naidu

Kiran

Satyavathi

Sathyanarayana

Sasikala

Indrani Ammal

Venkatesh Vijaya

Pallikonda Srihari

Shobha Aditya

T.P. Venkatraman S

Naresh Kumar

Rabindra

Sangeetha

Krishna Pendalaya

Roshini

Nyan

Sarita Rhia

Lekha

Neel

Bhaskeri

Lavakumar m Devi Jayakumar m Renuka Selvakumar m Anithra Sukumar m Nalini Vasanthi m Sarangarajan Premakumari m Mohandas Sarlikumari m Anand Kumar Kumar

Krishnamurthy Sharan Kumar

Arun Kumar D

Vidya m

T Hanumanthappa

Thejorammana Bhargavi Bharathi Poornima

Usha m

Padmanabhan Karthik

Yashwini

LEGEND S son D daughter m married Db date of birth Dd date of death

GOPINATH’S MATERNAL FAMILY

Dr. Venkatswamy Naidu

Janakiamma D

Subhadramma Dd: 7-02-1969 m

Pagadala Govindarajulu Naidu D

Radhabai Amma Dd: 12-02-2000 m

Thota Ramakrishnaih Chetty Dd: 1952 D

Rukminibai aka Samyuktha (Baby) Db: 28-09-1936

Geetha

LEGEND S son D daughter m married Db date of birth Dd date of death

m 22-02-1948

Sathavalli Perumalswamy Govindarajulu Db: 14-03-1923; Dd: 22-07-2007

Gopinath

Db: 29-03-1950

Db: 15-09-1951

PULAKHANDAM

SATHAVALLI

CHAPTER

1 My Mother’s Family

My great grandparents Shri Pagadala Govindarajulu Naidu and Shrimati Subhadramma My grandmother (Their daughter and only child) Shrimati Radha Bai married Shri Thota Ramakrishniah My mother (Radha Bai’s daughter): Shrimati Samyuktha (nee Rukmini) married my father Shri Sathavalli Perumalswami Govindarajulu

hree generations of my mother’s family had prayed for a lad and, finally, lo and behold on 15 September 1951, at the Koyaji Nursing Home, Pune (now known as Jehangir Hospital), I was born to S.P. Govindarajulu (SPG) and my mother Samyuktha, nee Rukmini Devi, aka Baby. Their first child, a year-anda-half earlier, had been a girl, my sister Geetha, and everyone had held their breath to see what the second child would be. I was named Sathavalli Govindarajulu Gopinath, aka SGG or Gopi. I traced my mother’s family to three generations of the Pagadala family. My maternal great-grandfather was Pagadala Govindarajulu Naidu, who had held the post of Tahsildar in the Andhra Province in the early twentieth century (possibly 1900-1910). He married Subhadhramma (Avva). When my great-grandfather Pagadala Govindarajulu Naidu died, he left a reasonable estate for Avva. An astute business sense coupled with her practical nature made her move to Madras. She bought herself a Baby Austin car (imported from England) and parked herself at the Connemara Hotel while she built three large houses, on three grounds 5

Reminiscence

The chief mode of travel—an elephant with a mahout to take him safely through the jungles inhabited by tigers and other wild animals— was usually made available by the affluent families in the district

each, in a mango orchard sold to her by the Raja of Venkatagiri, on what is now known as Maharaja Surya Rao Road, Alwarpet, Madras 600018. She named the houses after my mother, grandmother and herself: Rukmini Vilas, Radha Bhavan and Subhadralaya. She rented out two of the houses to obtain a comfortable income. My mother’s father Thota Ramakrishniah Chetty had been a successful barrister and had been tragically paralysed 7 or 8 years previously. The family needed someone to provide for them and hoped for a male heir. My mother was only 13 years old when she was married to my father, who was teased for having been a cradle snatcher. Great-grandmother Avva Subhadramma was the mother and caregiver of my grandmother’s family, and also took care of my sister and me in our younger days. As fate would have it, owing to the illness of her son-in-law, my grandfather Thota Ramakrishniah, Avva sold one of the houses (Rukmini Vilas, No. 4, Maharaja Surya Rao Road) for a paltry sum of Rs 30,000 in the late 1940s to ensure his care. Avva managed well, and independently conducted my mother’s marriage. Sadly, she had to sell one more house—Subhadralaya—in a distress sale. My grandfather’s desire for my mother to study at Vishwa Bharati in Shantiniketan, which had been the brainchild of Rabindranath Tagore, went into smoke owing to her early marriage. Thanks to my father, Radha Bhavan was retained and eventually remodelled to serve as a threestoreyed residence, with the rental of two floors to allow Avva and my grandmother Radha Bai to enjoy their maintenance and to live in the upper floor, which served as the family home. Even today the Banganapalle mangoes from trees that were already there in the orchard, which are over a hundred years old, are eagerly awaited by family and friends and continue to grace many a table.

A page from Avva’s past

Dr. Venkatswamy Naidu (DMO)

We admired and almost revered Avva to the extent that we named our cottage in Kodaikanal Sai Subhadhra Villa after her. She was born to Dr. Venkatswamy Naidu, a District Medical Officer (DMO), and Smt. Janaki Amma. They lived in Berhampore, on the border between the now states of Orissa and Andhra Pradesh. The tales we heard as little children from Avva and my grandmother, Radha Bai (Amma 6

My Mother’s Family

to me and my sister) and my mother (Mom) make fascinating reading. The DMO served everyone in the district, the rich and the poor. The chief mode of travel—an elephant with a mahout to take him safely through the jungles inhabited by tigers and other wild animals—was usually made available by the affluent families in the district. These same families paid for his services with gold sovereign coins. Others would give him rice, ghee, poultry and other commodities. They lived well, as was reflected by Avva’s independence. Avva’s story continues. She fixed a good marriage for her only daughter Radha Bai to Thota Ramakrishniah Chetty at a rather young age, as was the practice in the days gone by. When my grandfather was paralysed, Avva maintained him and my grandmother Radha Bai by sending money each month so that they could continue living comfortably in their home in Koduru Village. My grandfather Thota Ramakrishnaih Chetty had led a very colourful life in England. He was born P. Subhadramma—Avva

Barrister Thota Ramakrishniah

T. Radha Bai—Amma

Reminiscence

My Mother’s Family

into a Zamindari family. His parents—father Thota Venkatrayala Chetty owned much land (in Telugu known as “Chostriams” or villages), and mother Gangojamma was a tough and loving mother—lived well. They sent my grandfather to Cambridge, England to become a barrister. We have preserved the postcards my grandfather sent from England in the 1920s. Amma (Radha Bai) seemed to have been peeved because she, as a grudge, used to tell us that “Your Grandfather had a jolly good time in England with all the habits of a ‘Gentleman’, a lot of friends (thella-ammailu or memsahibs), playing tennis and socialising in the evenings.” This seemed evident because my grandfather gave up his studies and was sent back to England three times to complete his barristership (Bar-At-Law) by his rather strict mother, Gangojamma. He eventually completed the requirements successfully. During this period, Gangojamma’s brother seemed to have usurped all the property by fraudulently obtaining his sister’s signature, leaving my grandfather to inherit just a 5-acre piece of land, albeit with a majestic house and well, in the village of Railway Koduru, Rajampet Taluk, Cuddapah District. This is where my maternal grandparents lived. My grandfather Barrister Thota Ramakrishniah Chetty was a man of medium build, fair-skinned, and handsome by any yardstick, and he sported a traditional turban of those days, quite unlike a gentleman returned from England. He practised law in the courts of Nandalur, Rajampet and Cuddapah until he was hit by paralysis. However, habits die hard. He never could give up the lifestyle he had imbibed whilst in England. At home in his village he loved entertaining English friends; he indulged in horse racing in Bombay and lost fortunes of gold and jewellery including a priceless family heirloom (a Blue Jager diamond necklace). He would have his whiskeys transported from Bombay on a train to Madras and have his consignment unloaded at Koduru. Coming from Spencer and Company, Madras (where he maintained an account), would be preserved foods, soft drinks, soda and ice. Empties found their way back to Madras on the return trains from Bombay. With the railway station handy, what better way to utilise transportation. My grandmother Radha Bai was the bartender and joined my grandfather on the lonely evenings with a drink (cocktail) and smoke, learning to enjoy the English habits my grandfather transferred to his lady love. 3Wedding of my grandparents, Radha Bai and T. Ramakrishniah, with Subadhramma and Govindarajulu in attendance

Reminiscence

My mother’s father was always immaculately dressed in a white cotton suit with a turban. My mother recalls how the sarees were preserved in a red camphor infused wrap

My grandfather fought to regain his property in the courts of Cuddapah, but his son-in-law, my father, whose job was outside the Madras Presidency, found it difficult to pursue the case and the case continues to remain uncontested. My father in his wisdom didn’t see the sense in chasing something when he had adequate. It seemed to me like sound advice. So, I too let it be. As the law of averages would have it, the family who had usurped the land lost most of it to the Urban Land Ceiling Act. Poetic justice!! My mother Rukmini Bai was born on 28 September 1936 in Rentachintala, Andhra Pradesh, and grew up for the most part in Koduru in Radha Bhavan. She fondly recalls the gardens filled with fruit trees of large-sized sweet limes (cheenipandu), chickoos (sapotas) the size of which she has not seen to date, lime trees, jamun and mango trees, not to forget the fragrance of flowers like the Jasmine and Night Queen (Raat ki Rani) and display of colourful bougainvilleas. No piped water was available, and their water supply came from a large well in the Rajasthani style with steep steps leading down. Before the advent of electricity, kerosene lanterns illuminated the house. The gardens were watered by chadas—the traditional water lifting device using bullock carts. My mother had silver tableware and English crockery, all of which was eventually stolen. Her toys, which we managed to salvage, were made of silver—animals, fans, ships, cars —and she even had a doll house. She was taking violin lessons when marriage interrupted her classes. She recalls her trips to Madras to stay at the Connemara or Everest hotels. Her mother Radha Bai was very fashionable and enjoyed wearing sarees and jewellery, and, what do you know, sleeveless blouses. My mother’s father was always immaculately dressed in a white cotton suit with a turban. My mother recalls how the sarees were preserved in a red camphor-infused wrap. The bath water was always scented with rose water. They were all non-vegetarians and connoisseurs of food.

Radha Bai with her daughter, Rukmini

On full moon nights the family enjoyed dining out on the terrace, and even slept there, somehow warding off the creepy crawlies that roamed the gardens in merry abandon. I recall a detail on a visit to the family home—a punkah (fan) was hand pulled on ropes and pulleys. To prepare a variety 10

My Mother’s Family

for their table a Nair cook from Kerala was engaged. The migratory ways of the Keralites was in evidence since the 20s, as Avva Subadhramma, also had a Nair cook. The marriage of my grandparents Radha Bai and Thota Ramakrishniah took place at the home of Dewan Bahadur Varadharajulu Naidu, a District Judge in the 1920s, at Ashramam, 47 Harris Road, off Mount Road. Marriage halls and convention centres did not exist in those days, and weddings were performed in the homes of friends who possessed a large urban estate. The long-lasting friendship between the two families continues to this very day. The sons of Sunder Rao Naidu, the son of the Rao Bahadur (the first Mayor of Madras after Independence in 1947) were good friends of my father, namely, Venkatapathy Rao, Venugopal Rao and Narayana Rao.

Rukmini—Mom

CHAPTER

2 My Father’s Family

My great grandparents Shri Sathavalli Manavalswamy Naidu and Shrimati Andal Ammal My grandparents Shri Sathavalli Manavalswamy Perumalswamy Naidu and Shrimati Iravathi Ammal My parents Shri Sathavalli Perumalswamy Govindarajulu and Shrimati Samyuktha

y father S.P. Govindarajulu was born on 14 March 1923 and passed away at the age of 84 years on 22 July 2007, in Chennai, Tamil Nadu. His parents were S.M. Perumalswamy Naidu and Iravathi Ammal. My paternal great grandfather, S.M. Naidu came from humble beginnings and married Andal Ammal, who bore three other children in addition to my grandfather: Bangarswami Naidu, Savithri Ammal and Vijayalakshmi Ammal. Not much is known of these three and their families. My grandfather had a career in the Police Force of the Madras Presidency, starting as a Head Constable and rising to the post of a Superintendent of Police. I understand that his service was cut short prior to Independence because he gave testimony to an event in which an English officer molested a “native” lady. He was a witness and refused to utter any falsehood, for which he was penalised by being demoted. A grand old man with a handlebar moustache, he had seven children through two marriages. His first wife, who died in childbirth, was Jayalakshmi Ammal. Together they had four children: S.P. Ramachandran, Indrani Ammal, Satyavathy Ammal and Saraswathi Ammal. My father was born to his second wife, Iravathi Ammal, and there were two other children: Lalitha and Narendran. 12

My Father’s Family

Top left: S.M. Perumalswamy Naidu and Jayalakshmi Ammal Top right: S.M. Perumalswamy Naidu, a Freemason Bottom left: S.M. Perumalswamy Naidu and Iravathi Ammal

Reminiscence

What impressed me most about my grandfather was the registered will that he left behind, which was well-articulated and written by a knowledgeable lawyer. He provided for a school in the neighbourhood, for his servants and workers, and for all seven of his children. Each of his children inherited rentable properties. My father and two of his sons-in-law were the Executors of the will. They took their role seriously and discharged their duties to the letter. My eldest uncle Ramachandran received honours for his service in Iraq with the British army, but to support his expensive tastes, he spent his inheritance, and even cut down the mango garden in Madambakkam to be sold for firewood, to fuel his tastes. Luckily, his as yet minor son had been provided for by the terms of my grandfather’s will, and my father ensured Top: (l-r) Mom carrying Geetha, Gopi with driver, that he received what was his due. My aunt Lalitha, who was unmarried at the time Lalitha, Narendran, of her father’s death, had been given a house and a 5-ground plot, to be sold by my Subadhramma and Iravathi father for her marriage. However, my father in his wisdom spent his personal money Ammal, Poona 1953 to conduct her marriage to a young TNEB Asst. Engineer, K.S. Srinivasan, from Facing page: Marriage of Lalitha and Srinivasan with Krishnagiri in Tamil Nadu. (He eventually retired as Chief Engineer.) He handed over my parents (standing), Geetha, the land to my aunt’s heirs, who eventually sold it for a princely sum in 2003. and Gopi (seated), and Usha extreme right, Madras January 30, 1957

My uncle Narendran, under the guidance of my father, found a career in Military Engineering Services after studying in Ferguson College in Pune and Engineering in Gwalior. The main family home was given to him along with 8 acres of land in Tambaram. He sold some of his property to educate his son Dr. Saikishore in Chidambaram, and Dr. Sai now has a flourishing practice at the Isabel Nursing home, Chennai. Saikishore established the KL Hospital together with his wife Lata (who was his junior in Chidambaram and from a prominent political family in Thiruvanamalai).

My Father’s Family

CHAPTER

3 Dad’s Story: The Beginning…

T My grandmother never relied on anybody and lived life on her terms after the passing of my grandfather. She used public transport to the end and even turned down the use of my father’s car and driver. She always gave a lot of respect to the downtrodden.

he family found residence in Saidapet, then a suburb of Madras. The urban pattern in those days was to proliferate, whereas the rural methods were one child is more than enough, as was the case on my mother’s side for three generations. My grandmother Iravathi Ammal was a woman of great substance and managed the seven children and their families with a lot of love and affection. Her parents hailed originally from Rangoon in Burma, as her name would suggest. On returning to India, they made Bangalore their home. Her father was a doctor with an LMP degree and served in the British Army in the Boer War, in South Africa. A very religious person, despite the disability to her leg she travelled great distances to visit temples all over India. She told us tales of her trips to Badrinath, Kashinath and Kedarnath and temples down south. A person of frugal means, she would stretch her income to the maximum. She churned out enough to feed two generations of the family and particularly satiate the voracious appetite of my grandfather. The location of the home provided a good source of seafood, mutton and vegetables. Grandfather possessed a double barrel gun with which he went out for shoots. This gun is now a proud possession of my cousin Inti Sathyanarayana in Chittoor. My grandmother never relied on anybody and lived life on her terms after the passing of my grandfather. She used public transport to the end and even turned down the use of my father’s car and driver. She always gave a lot of respect to the downtrodden. She never needlessly took money from anybody, but relentlessly collected her rents, travelling in the heat and dust to Tambaram and Madambakkam to do so. She managed all the properties till the time came to handing them over to her children. My father’s and uncle’s lands in Madambakkam were cultivated and rice bags delivered home by the very reliable Mudaliar of the Madambakkam village. I met him on several occasions, and in his old age he became increasingly bent in stature, eventually making me give up remote controlled landlordism. My grandmother would treat me on my school holidays enroute Madras, and on several occasions we would eat out and go to the movies. Sometimes I would have less than a day before I had to catch 16

Dad’s Story: The Beginning…

the train at Madras Central for a late onward coal-engine driven train to the north. I vividly recall the swordfight in an MGR movie we saw together. She passed away on 22 April 1981.

… and his education I really do not recall time spent with my maternal and paternal grandfathers, as they had both passed away before I was two years old. Sadly, my father did not have a good equation with his father. My father was stubborn and a determined fighter, which stood him in good stead throughout his career. He had his early education at the Ramakrishna Mission School in T-Nagar, Madras (C.R. Ramakrishnan, the Larsen and Toubro giant, was one of his illustrious classmates). A born leader, he had a way with friends right from an early age. Often playing truant from school, he was once caught dating a girl. I guess it was his natural intelligence that moved him up in his educational career. After Matriculation he moved to the Madras Christian College, Tambaram, for his Intermediate. Getting into any professional college was probably as bad then as it is nowadays. The selection for Engineering was done by Dr. J.J. Rudhra, the Principal of the College of Engineering, Guindy. It was done according to several criteria: merit, communal rotation, proportional representation of the districts of the erstwhile Madras State, and a few seats were allocated based on the quota for war efforts. A quota system existed for the various C.R. Ramakrishnan (courtesy C.R. Rajkumar) categories and he knew that admission into the College of Engineering,

The College of Engineering Guindy, Madras 17

Reminiscence

College of Engineering, Guindy

The College of Engineering, Guindy (CEG) is a public engineering college in Chennai, India and is India’s oldest technical institution, founded in 1794. It is also the oldest technical institution to be established outside Europe. Due to the growing need for surveyors by the East India Company, the ‘School of Survey’ was established in a building near Fort St. George on the suggestion of Michael Topping in 1794. This school was one of the first of its kind in the country and it started out with 8 boys. It became the Civil Engineering School in 1858 and was rechristened as College of Engineering in 1859, with the inclusion of a mechanical engineering course. The college was shifted for a short period to Kalasa Mahal, Chepauk, before settling at its present location in 1920 as College of Engineering, Guindy. … College of Engineering, Guindy is one of the first institutions in India to offer degrees in Mechanical Engineering, Electrical Engineering, Telecommunication, Highway Engineering and Printing Technology. … In 1994 a postal stamp was dedicated to the 200th anniversary of the College of Engineering, Guindy. Wikipedia

Dad’s Story: The Beginning… My PARENTS

Guindy from the Madras quota was improbable. The genius that he was, he “domiciled” himself in Chittoor at the residence of his brother-inlaw, Inti Muniswamy Naidu in order to qualify for a seat from the quota for Andhra, which was a part of the Madras Presidency. As dame luck would have it, he got the seat on his own.

Above: Civil Engineering Degree Certificate, 1945 Below: Double graduate in Highways, 1946

A tremendous whiz in maths, he enjoyed the subject and could design a reinforced concrete beam on the back of his palm using the Tamil language in numbers. However, he was an irregular student in college, and was often to be found in the hostel room of his buddies instead of in class. My father enjoyed life to its truest extent, defying logic and tradition. He had a way with the ladies, charming them by his conversation and manners, and had plenty of girlfriends. He joined the hostel mess, which served the best food in the Presidency for thirty paise (Rs. 0.30) per meal. I recall him telling me that he devoured 16 idlis, 8 vegetable cutlets and 10 gulab jamuns, on different occasion. He was not an easy student to handle and the Principal, Prof. Rudra, and and Maj. Paul had some trying times with him. In his college days my father led a group for the freedom struggle. The Quit India Movement was announced by Mahatma Gandhi on 8 August, 1942. Hartals and strikes were being held all over the country. The College of Engineering, Guindy, also participated. An incident not to be forgotten, and chronicled by his classmates, is that my father courted arrest at the Saidapet (Marmalong) Bridge for creating a road block in support of the clarion call of the Quit India Movement. My father was later released after the intervention of Dr. Rudhra and the students of the College. He was fondly known as the “Saidapet Raja”. The 1945 batch was an endearing lot. His classmates fondly recall his leadership in managing the

Reminiscence

“The Graduate” 20

Dad’s Story: The Beginning…

Arts section as its Secretary. He brought in popular stars, including Natraj Sakuntala, to the stage and the students enjoyed lively programmes. He did say that he engaged bouncers to control the boisterous ones to ensure the programme went unhindered. Most of his classmates held important positions till their retirement. My father graduated, much to the surprise of his family. No miracle there, with hard work and intelligence at the right time. As the adage goes: work hard and play hard. My father was a student of the College from 1941 to 1945 and graduated with a degree in Civil Engineering, B.E. (Civil). Thereafter, he did a course in Highways, giving him an additional degree in B.E. (Highways) in March 1946, becoming a double graduate, which took everyone by storm and surprised some of the teaching staff of his era—Prof. Seetharama Iyer, Krishnaswami Iyengar, Prof. Varghese, Prof. Sadarangani, Prof. Kalyan Raman, Prof. Vores, Prof. Ramanathan and Prof. Sukumaran. My father held his classmates in high regard and always maintained constant touch with them from whichever part of the country he served in. It was not the digital age with WhatsApp and e-mail. He used the India Post and Telegraph system, using their prepaid envelopes, inland covers and postcards, and sending communications by telegram and making trunk calls. He was a prolific writer and a gentleman to the core. He never left letters unanswered, and his punctuality and promptness was a trait I think I managed to imbibe a little.

Dad with his best buddy, C. Sanjeevi

My father retired as Director of Designs (Engineer-in-Chief ’s Office, Military Engineering Service, New Delhi), the equivalent of a Chief Engineer or Brigadier in the Military. N. Mahalingam, an industrialist and philanthropist of the Sakthi Group; K.S. Hegde, Vice-Chancellor of the Mysore University (He was my Principal in the College of Engineering, Guindy for a year or two); Manavalan, Chief Engineer of Tamil Nadu; Prof. Bennet Pithavadian (who owned and headed his own premier architectural company); Osman Ali Khan (MP); Capt. B. Kuppurao Nowlay; C. Sanjeevi (Chief Engineer, TNEB); Dr. S. Panchanathan; T.C. Muthukalayani and S. Ramalingam were amongst the many classmates he kept in touch with. 21

Reminiscence

25th Reunion of the Class of 1945, 1970

50th Reunion of the Class of 1945, 1995

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The Mahalingams, 1970

The Hegdes, 1970

My parents, Beena, Venkat and Rukmini at the Reunion, 1995

The Sanjeevis, 1995

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Alumni Centre, Hall of Fame, President 1980-81

The Class of 1945 had the unique distinction of having established class reunions and donation of funds to the College, and most batches followed suit. Reunions were held in 1970, 1975, 1978, and 1995 (Class Golden Jubilee reunion). A hall named after Dr. J.J. Rudhra was built through the contribution of classmates. The function coincided with the Bicentenary celebrations of the College. The resolve of the Class of 1945 is difficult to emulate. Since my passing out of the same college in 1973, our classmates have met only once with the families in 1998, the 25th year after our graduation.

CHAPTER

4 Career: First Half, 1946-1967

y father’s working life began in 1946. His entire career from 1949 until retirement in 1981 was with the Military Engineering Services, which I have divided into two chapters for convenience/ease of reading.

Assistant Executive Engineer (AEE), NDA Poona My father started his career in the Public Works Department (PWD), Chepauk, in 1946 and saw himself being posted to different places in the Madras Presidency, carrying out survey works for bridges. He married my mother Samyuktha (nee Rukmini Bai), the daughter of Barrister Thota Ramakrishniah and Radha Bai Amma, on 22 February 1948. My parents got married in the ancestral home of Ranjit Prathap at Vijayaraghavachari Road in Madras. This was made possible because of family connections in ages gone by. Whilst in his first job in Madras, my mother accompanied him whenever she could. He told us on one of our numerous road trips how he made my mother hold one end of the tape or the survey staff near the Pennar River Bridge.

Poona (Pune) … Poona grew under the Moguls from 1636 as a trade route. Its importance escalated after 1750 when it became the capital of the Marathá Empire, where the Peshwas had their palace. A battle for Poona in October 1802 between the Peshwa Bajirao II and the Holkars led to the 2nd Anglo-Maratha War. The British involvement in Poona began after the 1802 Treaty of Bassein—when Peshwa Baji Rao allowed the English to station a small military force in the town. After the Peshwas were defeated at the Battle of Poona on 17/18 November 1817 (aka: Battle of Yeraoda) between the British and the Marathas near Poona in the 3rd Maratha War, the city was seized. It was placed under the administration of the Bombay Presidency. The British built a large military cantonment to the east of the city (still used by the Indian Army). The arrival of the railways opened up communication routes to Bombay, previously constrained by the terrain. Poona Municipality was established in 1858 and was at one time the “monsoon capital” of the Bombay Presidency. Homepage of FIBIS (Families in British India Society)

Reminiscence

In 1949 he wrote a competitive examination and was selected to serve in the Military Engineering Services and posted in Poona (now Pune). He took up his assignment as an Assistant Executive Engineer and there started his adventures in nation building: twelve solid years in the building up of the National Defence Academy (NDA) in Khadakwasala—a state-of-the-art Institution that boasts even today of the quality of its construction. My sister Geetha was born on 29 March 1950 in Madras. Avva Subadhramma was around to help my mother then, and also a year and half later when I was born on 15 September 1951.

Above: Construction of the National Defence Academy and the visit of Morarji Desai, Chief Minister of Bombay State, in the early 50s

NDA, Poona

Reminiscence

The National Defence Academy (NDA) is the joint services academy

of the Indian Armed Forces, where cadets of the three services, the Army, the Navy and the Air Force train together before they go on to respective service academy for further pre-commission training. The NDA is located in Khadakwasala, Pune, Maharashtra. It is the first triservice academy in the world. The alumni of NDA include 3 Param Vir Chakra recipients and 12 Ashoka Chakra recipients. NDA has also produced 27 service Chiefs of Staff till date. The current Chiefs of Staff of the Army, the Navy and the Air Force are all NDA alumni from the same course. At the end of the World War II, Field Marshal Claude Auchinleck, then Commander-in-Chief of the Indian Army submitted a report to the Government of India in December 1946 and recommended the establishment of a Joint Services Military Academy, with training modelled on the United States Military Academy at West Point. After the independence of India in August 1947, the Chiefs of Staff Committee immediately implemented these recommendations. The committee initiated an action plan in late 1947 to commission a permanent defence academy and began the search for a suitable site. It also decided to set up an interim training academy, known as the Joint Services Wing (JSW), which was commissioned on 1 January 1949 at the Armed Forces Academy (now known as the Indian Military Academy) in Dehradun. Initially, after two years of training at the JSW, Army cadets went on to the Military wing of the Armed Forces Academy for two years of further pre-commission training, while the Navy and Air Force cadets were sent to Britannia Royal Naval College Dartmouth and Royal Air Force College Cranwell in the United Kingdom for further training. In 1941, Lord Linlithgow, then Viceroy of India received a gift of £100,000 from a grateful Sudanese Government in recognition of the sacrifices of Indian troops in the liberation of Sudan in the East African Campaign during World War II. Following partition, India’s share amounted to £70,000 (Rs 14 Lakh at the time; the remaining £30,000 went to Pakistan). The Indian Army decided to use these funds to partly cover the cost of construction of the NDA. The foundation stone for the academy was laid by then Prime Minister of India, Jawaharlal Nehru on 6 October 1949. Construction started in October 1949. The revised estimated cost for the whole project was Rs 6.45 crores respectively. The National Defence Academy was formally commissioned on 7 December 1954, with an inauguration ceremony held on 16 January 1955. The 10th JSW programme was transferred from Clement Town, Dehradun to NDA Khadakwasla. Wikipedia

Reminiscence

The NDA Construction team, 1955

Bottom and facing page: Dad at work, NDA Khadakwasla

Career: First Half, 1946-1967

Reminiscence

Mom and Dad in Srinagar

With the Jayarams, Poona 1950

Around this period, (Maj.) Jayaram Uncle and Krishnabai Aunty were also posted to Poona (Kirkee). Working with Dad were Kaushik and Subramaniam. Lakshmi Aunty, who lived nearby, was a close confidante of my mother. My mother’s career as a caregiver and homemaker began as a wife, mother of two and as a grandchild (of Avva). A tough start initially, for, not knowing the language—Hindi, Marathi or English— my mother had a pretty rough time. As the years went by, my father realised that with the constant moves in the services there would be great disruption in his children’s education. For someone who hadn’t cared for his own schooling, he took a bold decision. In 1958, he admitted us into The Lawrence School, Lovedale, a premier educational institution in the Nilgiris, which was managed by the Government of India’s Ministry of Human Resources, through a Board of Governors. The Headmaster, K.I. Thomas (‘KIT’ as he was fondly known), was a giant of a personality, I managed to hang in there to 32

Career: First Half, 1946-1967

finish school in 1967, whilst Geetha became a trifle homesick after the first year and asked to be withdrawn. She had a convent education in each location to which my father was transferred. During my father’s first posting, the family enjoyed holidays in Mahabaleshwar, Matheran, Khandala, Lonavala, Happy Valley, Ajanta and Ellora Caves and all the picnic spots in and around Bombay, Poona and Khadakwasala. Life’s small pleasures come in pressing the recall button. During my missions to Pune in 1996-97 whilst working with the Mahindras, I had the opportunity of meeting Brig. and Aunty Upasani and their daughter Rohini (retired as a senior officer of the State Bank of India) in Bombay. I last met Rohini when I revisited Lawrence School in 1972—she was in Wellington where her father was posted as an Instructor at the Defence Services Staff College. I also met the Natus, Top left: Trip to India Gate, Bombay 1957 Above right: With Geetha and Subadhramma, parents of Geetha’s friend Uttara. While constructing the UWC for the Poona 1953 Mahindras in 1997, in Pune, I met Mr. Gupchup (Technical Advisor to the Mahindras, who eventually retired as the Vice-Chancellor of Below: My mother, Rukmini Bombay University), whose uncle with the same name was my father’s mentor at the National Defence Academy in Khadakwasala. 33

The family - Poona Reminiscence

Reminiscence

Garrison Engineer (GE), Ahmednagar Dad’s next move was to Ahmednagar. In Ahmednagar, an armoured corp cantonment was just being built and my father received his first promotion as the Garrison Engineer. Having learnt the profession under stalwarts like Col. Pinto and Mr. Gupchup, and having learnt to respect contractors of yesteryear, like Chandiram and Poojara, he soon earned a reputation for quality, and for a temper that most feared. Yet when it came to displaying compassion, he would go to any lengths to support his juniors, or seniors, in distress. Both civilian and Army staff held him in high regard. Ahmednagar was where my mother became a student. My father engaged a nun from a local convent to educate her in the fundamentals of English, Arithmetic and etiquette. This was the foundation that served the adage that “behind every man is a woman”, in that my mother was in a position to converse and hold her own in meetings, card parties, or dinner meets. My father had a way My father had a way of of acquiring friends for a lifetime, particularly in the Army. His astute ways could acquiring friends for certainly have taught the management course at Harvard a thing or two on managing a lifetime, particularly the Army with civilians. He ensured that the organisation at no time submitted to the in the Army. His astute end user, but delivered what was rightfully expected and on time. My mother enjoyed ways could certainly the station as did we children. I would come home twice a year from boarding school in Lovedale. I recall enjoying movies on open lawns from a mobile projection unit, and have taught the hot dogs and chips. We had a two-door Standard car (with which my aunt Lalitha had management course the dubious pleasure of ramming a tree). My mother became an expert in embroidery at Harvard a and knitting, joining the officers’ wives in these and other pastimes.

thing or two on managing the Army with civilians.

The MES Inspection Bungalow was run by a khansama; this one was a man of Goan descent, by the name of Mr. Peter. My mother was tutored by him in the art of making different cuisines. Whichever part of the country we were in, we enjoyed the high quality of the MES Inspection Bungalow. Its food and service was so good that it could be compared to a good “star” hotel in terms of cleanliness, well-trained staff and not to forget the khansamas who dished out some of the choicest items on the menu. I still recall the excellent “mutton and chicken chops” made by Achuthan, the khansama at the MES Inspection Bungalow in Wellington. On my way home on the ‘toy train’ from Lovedale to Mettupalayam during my school days, I would receive a packed dinner at the Wellington station, with all the goodies thrown in. It all began in Ahmednagar, which was a place of great learning not only for my father, but also for my mother. They embarked on their long journey of soaking in the culture, the language and the food of people in each state in India, making and keeping friends wherever they went. My parents were hosts to our many guests and relatives from the South. My Aunt Lalitha’s two children, Venkatesh and Ramesh, were delivered in Ahmednagar, one 36

Career: First Half, 1946-1967

Ahmednagar, Maharashtra Ahmednagar was the seat of the Ahmednagar Sultanate of late medieval period (1496–1636 CE). This district is known for the towns of Shirdi associated with Sai Baba, Meherabad associated with Meher Baba, Shani Shinganapur with Shanidev, and Devgad with Lord Dattatreya. Ahmednagar district is part of Nashik Division. Sangamner is the biggest city by development, market, and population, after the city of Ahmednagar. Ahmednagar District was created after the defeat of the Maratha Confederacy in the Third Anglo-Maratha War in 1818, when most of the Peshwa’s domains were annexed to British India. The district remained part of the Central division of Bombay Presidency until India’s independence in 1947, when it became part of Bombay State, and in 1960 the new state of Maharashtra.” Wikipedia

at Booth Hospital in the Cantonment by Dr. Anderson, and the other at the Army Hospital. Dad had purchased Dr. Anderson’s car, a Standard Vanguard with a large boot, carrying license plate JKN 12. Both maternal and paternal grandmothers lived occasionally with my parents. My parents had many friends, some of whom I can recall: The Uthups (their children Jani and Ani were my seniors in school), Col. Brar of the 16th Cavalry, Maj. Naidu of the 3rd Cavalry (who eventually became a General). Cantonment life had its own pleasures without the hustle and bustle of the town and city, other than the occasional Visit of Brig. trip into a local market. We enjoyed traffic-free roads, canteens, club life with movies, and card K.N. Dubey, 1957 sessions galore particularly during Diwali. My sister and I learnt horse riding in Ahmednagar. My uncle Narendran was trained by my father to organise trips. After retirement, my uncle enjoyed taking all the relatives for tours to Mount Kailash, to Darjeeling, to Rajasthan and to the deep 37

Top: Bhoomi Puja, EME Workshop, Ahmednagar Below: Visit of Chief Engineer, Brig. Dubey, 1957 Centre: With the Pujaras Top right: Greeting the Sub-area Commander, Brig. Bedi, 1959 Bottom right: With Col. Pinto, CWE

south. My father took us on a tour of South India in the 60s, and we went to many places: Kanyakumari, Tiruchendur, Dhanushkodi, Tenkasi (Courtrallam), Trichy, Srirangapatnam, Tanjore, Kumbakonam, Hassan, Shravanabelgola, Jog Falls, and Cochin, and to other places I cannot seem to recall. 38

On the eve of Dad’s departure from Ahmednagar

Matheran, Bombay State

Reminiscence

Holidaying in Srinagar after the IRC seminarnar

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Picnic with his staff and families, Bhandardara, 1959

Reminiscence

Deputy Commander Works Engineer (DCWE), Fort William, Calcutta My father’s next move was to Fort William, Calcutta, (1961-1962) as the Deputy Commander Works Engineer (DCWE).

Until we received accommodation, we lived in the MES Inspection Bungalow within the ramparts of the Fort. There were some very enjoyable times, particularly walking on the promenade along the Watergate beside the Hoogly River, and enjoying ‘Muli’ and ‘Chocobars’

This was a big city and the lack of cohesiveness of a cantonment was very evident in all respects. Until we received accommodation, we lived in the MES Inspection Bungalow within the ramparts of the Fort. There were some very enjoyable times, particularly walking on the promenade along the Watergate beside the Hoogly River, and enjoying ‘Muli’ and ‘Chocobars’. Avva had the arduous task of accompanying my sister to and from school (The Canna School) in Alipore. Getting out into the big city had its advantages and disadvantages. Indian journalist Vir Sanghvi once said, “You want your city clean and green, stick to Delhi. You want your city rich and impersonal, go to Bombay. You want them hi-tech and full of draught beer, Bangalore’s your place, but if you want a city with a soul, come to Calcutta.” The quote is true in its basic sense. The city has earned the nickname ‘City of Joy’ for its soulful embodiment of culture, love, mystery, respect, enthusiasm and definitely some amazing sweet delicacies. Kolkata, as it is now called, is a city that upholds a perfect juxtaposition between the old world and the contemporary one. The residents of Kolkata might have a relaxed approach to life, taking a compulsory afternoon siesta, but the people visiting this city are left mesmerised by its old world charm. (Vir Sanghvi quote, and condensed text that follows are from Discovery Holidays - Kolkata) Kolkata served as the British capital till 1912, before it was shifted to Delhi. It is also the second largest city in India in area, after the capital city of Delhi. So, you will stumble upon a lot of British architecture and atmosphere almost everywhere in the city. Laid-back and relaxed are the perfect description of what you feel when taking a ride in a tram. Everyone is aware of the Howrah Bridge. And everyone visiting the city is definitely aware of the fact that it is one of the largest cantilever bridges in the world and the only one in India. When in the evening it lights up like a bride, you can actually see it in its actual glory. Kolkata is often called the ‘cultural capital of India’. With names like Satyajit Ray, Rabindranath Tagore, Mother Teresa, Amartya Sen and many others, Kolkata is the hub for intellectuals and artists. There are the massive stadiums, Eden Garden for cricket (where, in 1961, I got to witness an India-Pakistan 5-day Test match on stands made of timber posts) and one for football, to satisfy every sports lover’s dream. The mishti doi and rosogolla have been winning hearts for ages. 42

Fort William, Calcutta Reminiscence

Fort William was the main British military garrison in Calcutta. It is still in use today as the headquarters of the Indian Army Eastern Command. Named after William III, stadholder of the United Provinces of the Netherlands as William III (1672–1702) and King of England, Scotland and Ireland (1689-1702) reigning jointly with Queen Mary II (until her death in 1694). In 1698 the English obtained letters patent that granted them the privilege of purchasing the zamindari right (the right of revenue collection; in effect, the ownership) of the three villages. The British East India Company’s main Bengal trading station was moved from Hooghly (now Hugli) to Calcutta in 1690 after a war with the Mughals. Between 1696 and 1702 a fort was built in Calcutta, with the Nawab (ruler) of Bengal’s permission. This area around Fort William became the seat of the British province known in 1700. Calcutta became a separate presidency (administrative unit) accountable to London; until 1774 its governors, and thereafter until 1834 its governors-general, were given the added title “of Fort William in Bengal.” In 1756 the fort was taken by Siraj al-Dawlah, Nawab of Bengal. After the recovery of Calcutta (1757), this fort was demolished and a new one constructed farther south, with an unobstructed field of fire. The latter fort, completed in 1773, still stands.

The New Fort William was built by Robert Clive at a cost of £2,000,000 and was completed in 1773. Situated on the site known as the Maidan, it is octagonal in shape and covers an area of 2 square miles. Three sides of the fort face the Hoogly River and there are six gates. Garrison: Two infantry regiments were stationed at the fort, one British, one native, as well as a Royal Artillery company. Buildings inside the fort include: St Peter’s Church—the fort church built in 1828. St Patrick’s—Catholic Chapel built in 1857, Military Prison, Governor’s Residence—later used as the Soldier’s Institute and the Garrison School. Burial ground: As a result of new construction in the Fort in the 1880s, the ‘old’ burial ground is no longer in existence, and some of the headstones were moved and are now mounted on the walls at South Park Cemetery. The ‘new’ burial ground is part of the military base and is closed to the public. These burial grounds are different burial grounds to those at Bhowanipore Cemetery, the old (separate) part of which is known as the Military Burial Ground. FIBIS (Families in British India Society)

Wikipedia 43

Reminiscence

Howrah Bridge, lit up like a bride

The use of a variety of spices, kochi pathar jhol, ilish, pithe, payesh top the chart when it comes to satiating the taste-buds of the real gourmands. Notable scholars who were born, worked or studied in Kolkata include physicists Satyendra Nath Bose, Meghnad Saha, and Jagadish Chandra Bose; and Nobel laureates Rabindranath Tagore, C.V. Raman, Amartya Sen and, more recently, Abhijit Banerjee and his American wife Esther Duflo for Economics. City of Joy is a 1985 novel by Dominique Lapierre. It was adapted as a film by Roland Joffé in 1992. Calcutta is nicknamed “The City of Joy” after this novel, although the slum was based on an area in its twin city of Howrah. Public transportation in the 60s was very good. There were trams, buses and taxis. My father was allocated a comfortable flat in New Alipore (which was near the Mint). We enjoyed going to the movies and I recall seeing some real magnum opuses at the Light House and Metro on Park Street. There were numerous restaurants on Park Street (Trincas, Mocambo, Moulin Rouge). I must admit that as a 10-year-old watching scantily clad women gyrate, seated beside my parents was probably not the best thing, but it was a way of life in the restaurants on Park Street and Chowringhee, along with live bands. I would shyly take occasional glances, but my gaze was mostly fixed on the underside of the table. Flury’s Confectionery on Park Street turned out cakes 44

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New Market, Calcutta (Kolkata) Some of the earliest English quarters of Calcutta were in an area known then as Dalhousie Square. Terretti and Lalbazar nearby were the customary shopping haunts of the British. Later settlements arose in Kashaitola, Dharmatala and Chowringhee. By the 1850s, British colonists held sway in Calcutta and displayed increasing contempt for the “natives” and an aversion to brushing shoulders with them at the bazaars. In 1871, moved by a well-orchestrated outcry from English residents, a committee of the Calcutta Corporation began to contemplate a market which would be the preserve of Calcutta’s British residents. Spurred by the committee’s deliberations, the Corporation purchased Lindsay Street, made plans to raze the old Fenwick’s Bazar located there, and commissioned Richard Roskell Bayne, an architect of the East Indian Railway Company, to design the Victorian Gothic market complex which would take its place. It began to take shape in 1873, and Bayne was honoured for his achievement with a 1,000-rupee award, a large sum in the 1870s. Mackintosh Burn was the builder. The giant shopping arcade was thrown open to the English populace with some fanfare on 1 January 1874. News of Calcutta’s first municipal market spread rapidly. Affluent colonials from all over India shopped at exclusive retailers like Ranken and Company (dressmakers), Cuthbertson and Harper (shoe-merchants) and R.W. Newman or Thacker Spink, the famous stationers and book-dealers. Sir Stuart Hogg, then the Chairman of Calcutta Corporation, had shown tenacious support for the plans to build the New Market. So, 28 years later, on 2 December 1903, the market was officially named Sir Stuart Hogg Market and later shortened to Hogg Market. Bengali society, in the British era, called it Hogg Shaheber Bajaar, a name that is still in use, just as a painting of Sir Stuart Hogg still hangs in Calcutta Corporation’s portrait gallery. But the earliest provisional nickname, New Market, which remained in use throughout, proved to have the most sticking power. New Market’s growth kept pace with the city until World War II. The northern portion of the market came up in 1909 at an expense of 6 lakh rupees. Despite the gathering storm of World War II, an extension was engineered on the south flank, and the historic clock tower on the southern end of the market was shipped over from Huddersfield and installed in the 1930s. Florists were located near the front entrance, and stalls selling fresh and preserved foods were placed towards the rear of the market. Beyond the vegetable stalls, fishmongers and slaughterhouse butchers plied their trade, and, until the mid-1970s, at the very back of the market, exotic animals from all over the British Empire could be bought as pets. There are several renowned confectioners in New Market: Nahoum & Sons (estd. 1902) is truly historic, with its original mahogany cabinetry and marble counters. … Imperial Confectioners and D Gama compete for a close second and third place. Kalimpong Cheese and Bandel Cheese are local cheese available only in New Market. Wikipedia 45

Reminiscence

Top: Victoria Memorial Bottom: The family heading to the iconic Flurry’s, 1995

and pastries that still strike a nostalgic chord. Our introduction to Chinese food was made in Calcutta. “The Noodle” held our fancy in the way it was eaten with a slurp. I recall walking by the grand Great Eastern Hotel. The fresh rossogollas and samosas from K.C. Das were always a delight, along with other Calcutta street food. Picnics were in plenty, to the Victoria Memorial, the New Alipore Zoo and other places of interest. My first tryst with religion was a trip to the Kali Temple in Dakshineshwar, and then to Belur Math, the place where it all began for Guru Ramakrishna Paramahansa, Saradha Devi and Swami Viveknanda. The Howrah Bridge and Kalighat Kali Temple were places I also remember. Photos of all these spiritual leaders remained with me through school and college. We visited the Kidderpore market often and went to Diamond Harbour. A lot of our time was spent browsing the shops in New Market (formerly Sir Stuart Hogg market), Belur Math, Mullik Ghat, Flower Market, movies, and the Indian Museum. 46

Career: First Half, 1946-1967

Mom with Indira Chetty, Calcutta 1961

Fraternising with friends was infrequent and meeting distant relatives was occasional. My father had a friend in Keshav Rao, who was the Managing Director of the Ludlow Jute Mills. This friendship blossomed from the Madras times, when the two families were friends. Mr. Rao was the son of Bhasker Rao, ICS (Indian Civil Service) and was an MBA from the Harvard School of Business (1950s). My mother had a close friend in Indira Chetty. Her granddaughter Ranjini is now the wife of my nephew Leelendra (son of Krishna and Maj. Jayaram). Others friends were Ramakrishna (Income Tax Commissioner) and father of Devi who eventually married another cousin, K.V. Lavakumar, and Col. Sunder Raj’s brother-in-law Mr. Naidu whose children were Chandra and Surya. During my holidays, Dad would have trips planned for us. We visited Darjeeling and Kalimpong. I once accompanied Dad on an official trip to Panagarh.

Garrison Engineer (GE), Babina Cantonment

Considered one of the best postings, my parents enjoyed it in all respects. Dad had his work cut out for him as the Garrison Engineer

Our next move came in 1962 to an armoured corp cantonment in Babina, a sleepy town in Jhansi District, 18 miles from Jhansi on the north-south railway line. We were in Babina in the early Sixties and I would imagine the population should have been around 15,000. Considered one of the best postings, my parents enjoyed it in all respects. Dad had his work cut out for him as the Garrison Engineer. They made a lot of friends in this station: Col. Varoo and Jessy, Col. Puri, Maj. Menon and Thangam, Maj. Upasani and Sumithi, “Daddy” Inder Singh, and Sudhakar. We made contact with Jessy Aunty (before her passing in 2018) and her children (Jolly, Joseph, Deepak and Anthony) who live in Ernakulam, Kerala. Babina had its charm. We had a home help by the name of Sadhuram who taught me how to ride a bicycle. He took me fishing once and I thought I was going to learn the art of throwing a line. His turned out to be a different method. He threw some explosive into the river and up came the fish dead or shell shocked by the vibration. I’m not sure I quite endorse the cruelty of the method. Local practice, I guess. My sister, along with other children from Babina, was schooled in Jhansi. An Officers’ bus—a large “Shaktiman”—would ferry the kids back and forth. Our accommodation was superb—a tiled house with the old British style of keeping the kitchen separated by a corridor, with a large expanse of lawn and garden. Here again, we enjoyed having friends and relatives visit, including my great-grandmother. My uncle completed his engineering degree from the college in Gwalior and entered 47

Reminiscence

Babina, Uttar Pradesh Babina is a cantonment town in Jhansi district in the state of Uttar Pradesh, India. It is said that Babina is an acronym for British Army Base in Northern Asia. … The British base near Jhansi was created during the British Raj and passed to the Dominion of India on partition in 1947. … Jhansi district is the headquarters of the 31st Indian Armoured Division, stationed at Jhansi-Babina. It is an armoured division which has equipment like M3 Lee and M4 Sherman tanks. There has been a joint exercise from 1 to 30 Mar 2012 with the Singaporean Army at Jhansi witnessed by the President of India, Pratibha Patil. Wikipedia

Left: Mom, Jessy Aunty and kids Right: Maj. Varoo controlling the kids at a birthday party, Babina

the Military Engineering Services. (If one were to narrate the anecdotes of my uncle SPN’s life, another book can be written!) My father had an uncanny knack of mobilising friends for a picnic to Sukwa Dukwa Dam or some other picnic spot. The ladies were ready for potluck and cards in sunlight or on moonlit nights. Visits to Jhansi were regular on the weekends to catch up on Bollywood and the few restaurants that could retain our interest. Jhansi and its environs had their own places of interest—the Fort, the Rani of Jhansi’s History Museum, the Chaturbhuj Temple, Shree Ram Raja Mandir, Rani Mahal, Jahangir Mahal, Orchha and the Orchha Fort. We toured Gwalior (for pottery), and Chanderi (for sarees). Canasta and Mahjong were a great pastime for the ladies. The men joined in for card sessions in the evening, playing “Theen pathi” on Diwali and Rummy on other days. Dad and Mom partnered each other to play Canasta with their friends. 48

Career: First Half, 1946-1967

Mom became famous in Army circles for a Dosa and Coffee morning. Vadas and idlis were also a part of the menu. I recall the goodies made by my mother with her new ‘Baby Belling’ oven bought in the Army canteen—cakes, macaroons and other treats. For somebody from Koduru, she had come a long way to be able to entertain the Army brass and converse with them. Instead of remaining conservative, she chose, with Dad’s encouragement, to learn from the various cultures with which they came into contact—Punjabi, Gujarati, Malayalee, Marathi to name a few. My mother was a great hostess with a large heart, be it parties or taking care of staff, and my father had a large liberal heart to match hers and they both had a wonderful chemistry about them, making people take to them at a drop of a hat. Dad did not spare me during the school holidays and arranged for a nun from a nearby convent to come and tutor me in Maths. We enjoyed club life. Our car, the Standard Vanguard, stood us in good stead. I managed to coax Dad’s staff car driver to teach me to drive the car, which he promptly did, although I was only eleven years old. I had steadily grown in confidence to drive

The Fort, Jhansi, (1857)

Reminiscence

Anti-clockwise from top right: Independence Day function, Babina and (bottom right) celebrating Holi

Career: First Half, 1946-1967

Caption

On the eve of their departure from Babina, 1964

around the empty lanes (you could not call them roads at that time). My first solo adventure was to drop and pick up my mother at a card game. I was successful in not damaging the car and returning my mother safely home. A small town indeed, an officer known to my father had seen me drive and very politely, but laced with sternness, reported the event to him, who until then did not know that I had been taking his car out for a run. All hell broke loose.

S.O.1 (Planning), Udhampur, Jammu and Kashmir My father always enjoyed adventure. After being given a grand sendoff, we commenced our drive up to Udhampur, his next posting. The year was 1964. He was going on promotion as a Superintending Engineer with an official designation as the S.O.1 (Planning). Dad drove us through the Chambal valley, on our way to Delhi for a brief stay, prior to reporting for his post. Our excitement knew no bounds as we passed the ravines, hoping to see a “Gabbar Singh” ride out with his group on horses. We visited my aunt Vasantha at Lajpat Nagar, whose husband Palikonda Srihari was 51

Reminiscence

an up and coming executive in the Ministry of Transport after having completed his education in England. Their children Sangeetha and Rabindra live in the United States of America and are in touch with my family. Uncle Srihari lost his life very unfortunately. My cousin Inti Venkatnaryana, Aunt Vasantha’s brother, who was a practising advocate in New Delhi, represented her and fought a long drawn out court battle, and won the case. He took care of Vasantha Aunty and her children till they could leave their home. Being around the corner from Delhi were Agra and the Taj Mahal, and Mathura, and Fatehpur Sikri, where we went to temples and Mughal monuments in the area.

Aunty Vasantha with Sangeetha and Venku, Rabi and Sarita

Udhampur, a small hill town about 70 km from Jammu, could only be reached by way of a single-lane road cut through the mountainside. The drive from Pathankot to Udhampur via Jammu took as long as five hours, or more if there was a convoy on the road. In the 60s Udhampur was the headquarters of the XV Corp and headed by Lt. Gen. Candeth. We were housed in “Bashas” temporary

(l to r) The host, Col. Harish Chandra, Dad and Col. Rai in Leh, 1965

Career: First Half, 1946-1967

Udhampur, Jammu & Kashmir The city is named after Raja Udham Singh and much like the surrounding areas of the state of Jammu and Kashmir has a rich history going back thousands of years. Indian kings ruled this area until the arrival of the Sultanates from the West around 13 to 14th century B.C. From then on, Kashmir remained a part of many cities and princely states including the ones ruled by the Mughals and Afghans while ultimately becoming a part of the princely state of Kashmir which acceded to India. After the partition of India and the formation of Pakistan, this region has been hotly contested which resulted in Udhampur and many other cities becoming important military bases for defending the country. At an elevation of 2,024 metres (6,640 ft.) the mountain resort of Patnitop and the temple at Sudh Mahadev believed to be over 2800 years old are other popular tourist attractions of the district. … Udhampur is located on National Highway NH-44, which is the only national highway that connects Srinagar to the rest of India. … The Uttar Sampark Kranti Express train from New Delhi was the first train to run on this (Delhi-Jammu) link in 2005. (This train did not exist when Dad was posted to Udhampur.) … Dr. Syama Prasad Mukherjee Tunnel: It is India’s longest road tunnel with a length of 9.28 km (5.8 mi). It is the first tunnel in the India with a fully integrated tunnel control system. The tunnel reduces the distance between Jammu and Srinagar by 30 km and travel time by two hours. The Northern Command Headquarters of the Indian Army is based in Udhampur and consists of three Corps, the XIV, XV, and XVI. All units are deployed along the Line of Control in Kashmir, with the exceptions of the 39th Infantry Division, and the 2nd, 3rd, and 16th Independent Armoured Brigades. Prior to Independence, Northern Command Headquarters was located at Rawalpindi, and was responsible for the defence of North-West India. After Partition, the Command Headquarters was allocated to Pakistan. In India, a new headquarters designated as Western Command was located at Shimla to look after the Northern borders with Pakistan and some portions of Tibet. The need for a separate headquarters in the North was felt during First Kashmir War in 1948. The experience of wars in 1962, 1965 and 1971 reinforced the conviction … After 1971, Headquarter Northern Command was established at Udhampur, taking over responsibility for Jammu, Kashmir and Ladakh. … Troops of the Northern Command have been manning the highest battlefield in the world at the Siachen Glacier where the altitude of the posts varies from 15,000 to 23,000 ft. The XIV Corps is the field formation that is responsible for Ladakh and Kargil, and is responsible for intelligence about enemy positions near the Line of Control. … XVI Corps is believed to be one of the largest corps in the world as it consists of five divisions. Wikipedia

Reminiscence

accommodation and used bukharas to keep ourselves warm in winter. The write up by Wikipedia on Udhampur speaks volumes on the changes influencing the area and the interest the Government of India has been taking in it since the time we were there and, in particular, the Armed Forces and transportation system. Dad’s bosses were the Deputy Chief Engineer (DCE)—Col. Joseph, and the Chief Engineer (CE)—initially Brig. Joshi and thereafter Brig. J.S. Bawa. My father visited places like Leh, Ladakh, Kargil, Drass, Zojila Pass, Srinagar and Jammu on official duty. Though not quite as easily as in a cantonment, my parents found the right company and learnt to enjoy life in the most difficult of situations. Col. Rai and Suneetha, Diamond (Col. Joseph’s wife), Brig. Bawa’s family (the children—Manjeet/Guddi, Dimpu and Babli were my friends) were good company. Outings to Patnitop, Ramban and Baramula were always enjoyable. We made several trips to Srinagar and even attempted a trip to Badrinath, which we had to abandon as a result of avalanches. Col. O.P. Kapoor (Signals) and Kamlesh Aunty and their children Neha (USA) and Kavita (Singapore) are people we are still in touch with. Aunty Nilima and Maj. Kailash made quite a handsome couple. I admired Aunty Nilima—smart, well dressed and with exquisite etiquette—with boyish charm (not quite that of Rishi Kapoor and Simi Grewal in Mera Naam Joker). The Chopra Bazaar and Chinar picture hall was where most families hung around in the city.

Aunty Nilima and her kids

On one of our numerous trips to Srinagar, we visited Pahalgam, Gulmarg and a glacier at Sonamarg. We were accompanied by my father’s cousin S.B. Krishnamurthy and his family from Chennai. We got to stay in a houseboat on the Dal Lake, and visit many interesting places: Nigeen Lake, Mughal Gardens, Shankaracharya Temple, Hazratbal Mosque, Shalimar Bagh, Nishat Bagh, Lal Chowk and Anantnag. The family made several trips to Ma Vaishno Devi from Jammu. Geetha studied in the Presentation Convent in Srinagar and was a boarder. There were no trains in the early days, and she would take the officer’s bus from Srinagar to Udhampur, enduring a long torturous, winding drive. The city of Udhampur had a cinema hall for us to play catch-up with Hollywood and Bollywood films. There were no restaurants at all. On one of our family holidays we drove to Manali, going through Jogindernagar, Palanpur and Dharamsala. We stayed at Major Banon’s estate which had apple orchards. I can still recollect the crisp, clean air and fast-flowing Beas River with its pristine, 54

Career: First Half, 1946-1967

clear waters flowing through Himachal Pradesh to meet the Sutlej in Punjab, 470 km downstream. My first taste of Trout at the dinner table was not exciting in comparison to Seer or Bekti fish. It was during this trip that the car brakes failed and Dad had the presence of mind to crash the car onto the hill slope. The Vanguard required to be topped up in the radiator as overheating was a regular problem. The world is always filled with good people and we found ourselves being towed by a lorry to a workshop, and we all survived to tell the tale. On another occasion we drove from Udhampur to Chandigarh, Pinjore, Solan and Shimla. It was wonderful to see freshly fallen snow for the first time in Kufri. We even had a snowball fight. We enjoyed coffee and snacks at the India Coffee House and had a go at skating on the rink. Dad was a great planner and took every detail into consideration during a holiday. He used the telex and cable with great reliability in booking of his accommodation. Travel agents in those days were a rare breed and one had to persevere to ensure that bookings were made.

My parents with the Rais, Udappas and others, Srinagar

During another holiday we took a train trip to the NW and Western part of India, planned in meticulous detail with the Indian Railways’ Bradshaw travel guide. We saw a number of places, starting from New Delhi Railway Station and travelling to Jaipur, Jodhpur, Chittorgarh, Jaisalmer, Udaipur, Palitana temples, Mount Abu, Ahmedabad, Junagarh, the Gir Forest, Dwarka, Somnath, Rajkot, Bombay, Poona, Belgaum, Goa, Bangalore, and, finally, Mysore. I do not recall the year of the trip, but it was an eye opener in what the country had to offer a youngster. The Rajput kings and queens left me awestruck by their courage in fighting invaders. The sheer size and locations of the forts, built in very strategic locations, was something to ponder. The guides in each place made the stories very interesting with graphic descriptions, particularly the Fort at Chittorgarh and the place where Rani Padmini placed herself to be seen by her captor, Allaudin Khilji. Long live the Rajputs, our first responders in a crisis even to this day! The war with Pakistan was in 1965. The guns could be heard in Udhampur and the ground reverberated with the shelling. The possibility of a bomb being dropped in Udhampur was immense. Trenches were dug all over, so that when the sirens went 55

Reminiscence

off everybody charged into the bunkers. Avva was also there to share the excitement, but I was at school in Lovedale. Nights were all blacked out. Fortunately the war ended. The names of Lt. Col. Tarapore and Company Quartermaster Havildar Abdul Hamid of Babina, who lost their lives, are remembered for their heroism in the tank battles in Sialkot and Khem Karan sectors. Both were recognised for their bravery with Param Vir Chakras. May God bless their soul. I remember our time in Udhampur for other things. Our house help in Udhampur was a young Dogra lad by the name of Prem. He taught me a poem “Sarso ka Sag, Thoru may bhai, Bhale! Bhale!”—simple, loving people. Winters were pretty cold, but no snow fall, and to experience the excitement of it we had to drive up to Ramban at a higher altitude. Another exciting event was the visit to Udhampur of a Bollywood star, to see Col. Rai and his wife Suneetha who had a Bollywood connection. The whole colony congregated at their residence to get a glimpse of Manoj Kumar and his co-star. Aunty Suneetha was a stylish lady, well made up and groomed, and drove an open top Standard Herald in real filmy style. Both of them had a jumbo sized heart.

Top: My parents enjoying the winter sun with the Malhotras and Chopras, Udhampur 1966 Bottom: Meeting Manoj Kumar and Mumtaz, organised by Suneetha

My wife and I met the Rais in 2018 in Bangalore. Age had caught up with them, but their memory was still sharp. They narrated to us the story of how they brought up the son of their domestic help Kamala (who was with them in Udhampur, and still with them). They educated the boy in the United States and he now works in the USA, whilst Kamala continues to work for them. By another strange coincidence, my second daughter’s father-in-law Suresh Naidu is a good friend of Col. Rai and assists him at Turf Club events. Other friends with whom my parents kept in touch from the Udhampur days were Bharati and Maj. Chopra, Sumithra Aunty and Col. Udappa, and Mrs. and Brig. Narurkar (whom we met in Visakhapatnam in the 70s). 56

CHAPTER

5 Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

Commander Works Engineer (CWE), Madras State, Andhra Pradesh, Mysore State, Kerala State

y father was posted to Madras as the Commander Works Engineer (CWE) in 1967, a post he held till 1971. The jurisdiction of his command extended to the erstwhile Madras State, Andhra Pradesh, Mysore State (became Karnataka in November, 1973) and Kerala.

My father was involved in a lot of travel and had some wonderful projects, like the Avadi Tank Factories, the Army Hospital and housing in Wellington, the separated family quarters in Madras, and several others to execute. I recall a challenge thrown to my father by the GOC (TN, K,K,A), Maj. Gen. K.A.S. Raja (a highly decorated officer who led the UN Battalion in the Congo and also the father of my classmate Viju Raja at Lawrence School, Lovedale) to have his official residence completed in six months. Dad accepted the challenge and did complete the residence for Gen. Raja to occupy and enjoy before he retired to Rajapalayam. It was an opportune time for my parents to be in Madras. Dad helped a lot of people get jobs. I had just completed my schooling in the Lawrence School, Lovedale in December 1967 and was looking forward to a great holiday of six months before stepping on to the next rung on my education ladder. I managed a seat in the College of Engineering, Guindy (my father’s alma Mater—1945 batch). My parents harboured the thought of getting my sister married during the posting in Madras, the grounds for which were laid and it eventually materialised in 1972. The posting in Madras was reunion time with all our kith and kin. We were given a palatial house in Fort St. George right next to the Inspection Bungalow (it was claimed that Robert Clive lived there once). My mother had quite a job draping windows as large as 15 feet wide and 25 feet tall. She kept a lovely home. Domestic help was never an issue in Madras. Dad had Mani and Kuppu Rao (a Ram and Laxman jodi), the junior staff assigned to help us in settling down. Our staff car driver was Chinnaswamy, with Das, Krishnaswamy and Anthony to help occasionally. Venkatiah from Nellore was our gardener. 57

The History of Madras/Chennai Reminiscence Pallavas held sway over this region from the beginning of the 3rd century A.D. to the closing years of the 9th century except for the interval of some decades when the region was under Kalabharas. Pallavas were defeated by the Chola under Aditya-I by about 879 A.D. and the region was brought under Chola rule. Pandyas under Jatavarman Sundara Pandya rose to power and the region was brought under Pandya rule by putting an end to Chola supremacy in 1264 A.D. Pandya’s rule over this region lasted a little over half a century followed by Bahmini kingdom with the extension of Delhi Sultanate under Khilji dynasty especially under the rule of Alauddin Khilji, a pioneer of all revenue works. During 1361, Kumara Kampana II, the son of Vijayanagar King, Bukka I, conquered and established Vijayanagar rule in Tondaimandalam.

Chennai originally known as Madras Patnam, was located in the province of Tondaimandalam, an area lying between Pennar river of Nellore and the Pennar river of Cuddalore. The capital of the province was Kancheepuram. Tondaimandalam was ruled in the 2nd century A.D. by Tondaiman Ilam Tiraiyan, who was a representative of the Chola family at Kanchipuram. It is believed that Ilam Tiraiyan must have subdued Kurumbas, the original inhabitants of the region and established his rule over Tondaimandalam. Subsequent to Ilam Tiraiyan, the region seemed to have been ruled by the Chola Prince Ilam Killi. The Chola occupation of Tondaimandalam was put to an end by the Andhra Satavahana incursions from the north under their King Pulumayi II. They appointed chieftains to look after the Kancheepuram region. Bappaswami, who is considered as the first Pallava to rule from Kancheepuram, was himself a chieftain (of the tract round) at Kancheepuram under the Satavahana empire in the beginning of the 3rd century A.D. The Pallavas who had so far been merely viceroys, became independent rulers of Kancheepuram and its surrounding areas.

The Vijayanagar rulers appointed chieftain known as Nayaks who ruled over the different regions of the province almost independently. Damarla Venkatapathy Nayak, an influential chieftain under Venkata III, who was in-charge of the area of present Chennai city, gave the grant of a piece of land lying between the river Cooum almost at the point it enters the sea and another river known as Egmore river to the English in 1639. On this piece of waste land was founded the Fort St. George exactly for business considerations. In honour of Chennappa Nayak, father of Venkatapathy Nayak, who controlled the entire coastal country from Pulicat in the north to the Portuguese settlement of Santhome, the settlement which had grown up around Fort St. George was named Chennapatanam. The older area called the Madraspatnam lay to the north of it. Later on, the intervening space between the older

Fort St. George, 1783

Reminiscence northern site of Madraspatnam came to be quickly built over with houses of the new settlers (as the two expanded) and the two villages became virtually one town. While the official centre of the settlement was designated Fort St. George, the British applied the name Madras Patnam to the combined town. Golkonda forces under General Mir Jumla conquered Madras in 1646 and brought Chennai and its immediate surroundings under his control. On the fall of Golkonda in 1687, the region came under the rule of the Mughal Emperors of Delhi. Firmans were issued by the Mughal Emperor granting the rights of English company in Chennai. In the later part of the seventeenth century, Chennai steadily progressed during the period of Agency and under many Governors. During the regime of Governor Elihu Yale (1687-92), the most important event was the formation of the institution of a mayor and Corporation for the city of Chennai. In 1693, a perwanna was received from the local Nawab granting the towns Tondiarpet, Purasawalkam and Egmore to the company. Thomas Pitt became the Governor of Chennai in 1698 and governed for eleven years. This period witnessed remarkable development of trade and increase in wealth. The important events during this period were the blockade of Chennai by Daud Khan and its repulsion and the acquisition of additional suburban villages by the English. Thiruvottiyur, Vysarpadi, Kathivakkam, Nungambakkam and Satangadu were made as a free gift to the English in 1708. In 1735, Chintadripet was taken over and in 1742 Vepery, Perambur and Periamet were presented to the British. Nicholas Morse was the Governor from 1744 to 1746. The most important event during his time was the outbreak of war between England and France and the consequent struggle for supremacy between the French and the English in South India. Chennai was captured by the French in 1744 but consequent on the treaty of peace of Aix-La-Chapelle, Chennai was restored to the English in 1749. George Pigot was the Governor for the period from 1755 to 1763. The period is remarkable for the fact that the Company from a trading corporation, owning isolated towns, forts and factories, became a ruling power controlling vast territories. Charles Bourchier became Governor in 1767. During his period Hyder Ali who usurped the Sovereignty of Mysore

Governor Elihu Yale

joined hands with the Nizam and began an offensive on Chennai. In 1761, a treaty was signed between Hyder Ali and the Company for an alliance and mutual restitution of the conquests. The Governance of the Carnatic became the responsibility of the Chennai Government which could not maintain a large army without the revenue of Nawabs. In 1763, the English got the district of Chengalpattu known as Chennai Jagir for the maintenance of the army. Lord Macartney took charge of the Chennai Government in 1781. During his period, Chennai was turned into an important naval base. Major General Medows became Governor in 1790. The position of the English was made secure in South India. The elimination of other foreign power and settlement of the limits of native territory gave stability and paved the way for an era of commercial development. In 1792, in a new treaty Mohammed Ali handed over the entire management of the Carnatic to the English and accepted in return a pension. Another important event of this period was the outbreak of Mysore war. Tippu was killed in 1799 and the whole of Carnatic ceded to the British. 59

Reminiscence education. Important improvement made to Chennai city during the first half of the 19th century was the progress made in the establishment of institutions for professional and technical education.

Madras High Court

Thus the supremacy of the English in South India was established. The present day territorial limits of the city existed in the shape of scattered villages for centuries before the advent of the British. In the process of growth, many villages got agglomerated into a single unit. The shape and extent of the city which existed during 1939-40 was reached even during the opening years of 19th century. The period in between 1803 to 1827 represents consolidation and development of institutions. Sir Edward Elliot was the important Governor of Chennai during this period. He appointed a Judicial Commission with Munro as its President in 1814. Several reforms in the administrative system were made by the Commission. Sir Thomas Munro became the Governor in 1820 and continued till 1827. He tried his best to improve literacy. He initiated English education in Chennai and established a body called Board of Public Instructions to improve and direct public

School of Industrial Art was started in 1850, Civil Engineering College in 1834 and Madras Medical College in 1835, etc. The Madras University was started in September 1857. The Chennai High Court was created in June 1862. The Railway Company in Chennai was formed in July 1845. The first construction work began on 9th June 1853 and in 1858, South Indian Railway was formed having Chennai as the Railway Headquarters. Lord Hobart who was the Governor from 1872 to 1875 initiated Chennai Harbour project. The Congress party came to life during the period 1881-90. The Indian National Congress held its session in 1887 at Chennai. The First Governor of Chennai was Lord Ampthill (1901-06). Sir Arthur Lawby was the Governor from 1906-1911 and Lord Pentland from 1912-19. The important landmarks during this period were the establishment of Chennai Electric Supply Corporation in 1906 and opening of Indian Bank in 1907. During 1934 and 1936 for a short period, two Indians Sir M.D. Usman Sahib and Sir K. Venkatareddy Naidu acted as Governors of Chennai. In 1937, the Ministry of C. Rajagopalachari came into power for two years. The influence of the Governors on the administration considerably diminished. The British departed on 15th August 1947, but Chennai remained as a standing monument of what the British have done to India. Chennai.com

Central Station, Madras60

Reminiscence

(Clockwise from top left): A view of our home within Fort St. George, 1968; Party time at home in the Fort with Sheela and Bunny Gill; Celebrating my 18th birthday with family and friends, 1969; Sheeba (l) and Dimple, daughters of Brig. Chhachhi 61

Reminiscence

Venkatiah was a giant of guy and was a great help around the house. My father’s peon was Doraiswamy, turbaned and respectful in his ways. You don’t find people like this anymore in terms of loyalty and respect. The concept of peons and secretaries had by then died a natural death in corporate organisations over the years, but I guess in government institutions habits die hard. Weekends would occasionally be spent with Uncle Ramachander, Nainamma’s (my grandmother) brother whose children we became very fond of. They were all wonderful hosts, and some of them often served delightful chicken kurma and soft bread to go with it, and on certain days a cook was engaged to make dum biryani. Playing cards were a natural pastime. All my father’s relatives found their roads leading to Rome. Nainamma, aunt Indrani, aunt Saraswathi (Era Atha), aunt Lalitha and their families; Bhasker, Narendran and Avva came for long stays with us occasionally. Radha Bai Avva remained in Koduru and we occasionally visited her.

After Avva’s passing, my grandmother from Koduru moved to live with us and made occasional trips to My dear great-grandmother Avva passed away on 7 February 1969, at our home in the village

Fort St. George when I was in the first year of college. I vividly remember the moment. She held on to life till I arrived, and passed on as I held her hands. I miss her dearly. She revelled in our affection and also took the brunt of our anger. She was a lovely, soft lady with a very kind heart. As my source of unauthorised pocket money, she was very generous, and I still have a Japanese doll I won at a Guild of Service charity event. She always woke up early, bathed, and dressed like she was going out. She had a small box under her bed that contained her vanity kit. She always smelt pleasant. She went out unescorted till the very last and gave very little trouble on health grounds, as she knew how to medicate herself. She lived on her terms, earning her income by way of rent from the house in Alwarpet. Though not literate in the real sense, she was educated enough to protect her interests. She left behind a registered will, drawn up by a lawyer. She would send a money order to her daughter, my grandmother Radha Bai Avva in Koduru. After Avva’s passing, my grandmother from Koduru moved to live with us and made a few trips to the village. I named our cottage in Kodaikanal Sai Subadhra in honour of my great-grandmother.

Fort St. George, housing the Tamil Nadu Assembly

The time had come to bid farewell to our car, the Standard Vanguard (JKN 12), which had 62

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

Fort St. George, Madras

By the mid-17th-century, trade in the Coromandel Coast was already prospering with the British East India Company vying for monopoly over its French and Dutch counterparts. To protect English trade interests in the area, it was decided that an English Fort was needed in the region. And so, in the year 1639, Francis Day and Andrew Cogan, representatives of the British East India Company, purchased the strip of land along and inward from the present Marina Beach from the then Nayak rulers of the region, for the construction of a new Fort that was dedicated to St. George, the Patron Saint of England. On February 20, Day and Cogan arrived at the site with two ships and a few dozen workers and began work on a settlement that would later become Fort St. George. The Fort was finally completed on April 23, 1644, and had cost the crown nearly £3,000. The Fort was a cornerstone of British power in India... Arun Venkatraman

been in our service for over ten years. It was election time in the state and some political aspirant bought the car. Both my sister and I were good drivers. She had learnt how to ride a cycle and a scooter, which Dad had bought for me in the army canteen during my first year, and later the Ambassador as well. Dad was a generous soul, but had a temper that would scare the hell out of anyone when it was lost. There are plenty of occasions when the family bore the agony and brunt of his temper. We bought a brand new Ambassador car for a princely sum of Rs. 33,000, which lasted us some thirty years 63

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and then was sold for almost the same amount (Rs. 30,000). The car withstood a lot of wear and tear with long drives on national highways and mountain roads. The soon to be Chief Minister, Mr. M.K. Karunanidhi, decided the state should be renamed since the borders were drawn out on a linguistic basis. The anglicised Madras State became Tamil Nadu on 14 January1969. The State lost its Chief Minister, Anna Durai of the DMK party, in the month of February1969. As the then governing party thought fit, they buried him on the Marina Beach, a place of enjoyment for families to meet and enjoy ‘Thenga Manga Pattani Sundal’ and ‘Kai Murukku’. The State was drawn into caste politics, dividing the Aryans and Non-aryans. Language became a big issue when the Centre tried to impose Hindi as the National Language and the State bore the destruction of property by its disgruntled youth. The Industrial Index of the state plunged and Tamil Nadu was no longer a forerunner in manufacturing. Marina beach saw the beginning of its decline with burial sites for all Chief Ministers (Annadurai, M.G. Ramachandran (MGR), J.J. Jayalitha and M.K. Karunanidhi), pollution, garbage and unhygienic food-vending practices. I saw my State, and particularly Madras, transform into a large urban slum from a gracious well-planned city. One or two generations can recall its early iconic leaders, but with changing times, unless emphasised in history books they are a forgotten lot. The new generation have

A view of the Marina

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

The Madras posting helped my father in many ways. He got his service period in PWD recognised. He got my admission in an engineering programme

its priorities and they are not into statues or commemorations, let alone burial sites. If it is Jalli Kattu (an Indian Rodeo show with bulls) season during Pongal celebrations in January, they are focused on bull taming. The other obsession is with Kollywood filmstars, with the ‘Thalaivar’ (Rajnikanth) and Kamal Haasan floating their respective parties, hoping that the tide of events would flow in their favour in the 2021 elections. Tamil Nadu had become one large stage on which, in the words of Shakespeare, all the men and women are “merely players”. My sister went to the Queen Mary’s College (QMC) and completed her BA (Arts) in 1971. Whilst my parents were groom hunting, she joined the Cultural Academy at San Thome to be ready for life ahead. The Madras posting helped my father in many ways. He got his service period in PWD recognised. He got my admission in an engineering programme. Avva’s will was probated with no trouble. My grandmother Radha Bai Avva was rehabilated and taken care of by my mother. And it was while we were in Madras that we got to spend time with our kin folk. Our trips to Bangalore had night halts either in Chittoor or Palamner, where we spent time with Dad’s brother-in-law, Inti Muniswami Naidu and Aunty Saraswathi, and their son Inti Sathyanarayana and family. Each summer we got our supply of Malgova mangoes from their orchards. Inti Subramaniam and Sundaramma and their

Geetha’s Class of 1971,Queen Mary’s College, Madras

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family were very hospitable people. They had a palatial home in Palamner. They had three daughters, all of whom excelled in life, the youngest, Samyuktha (my mother’s namesake), becoming a Collector in the Administrative Services in Hyderabad. Our annual supply of tamarind for cooking came from Palamner. Horsley Hills near Madanapalle was a favourite spot with cool weather, almost but not quite like in Ooty. Inti Srihari and Aunty Gyanamba were another family we visited. Their children were Sampath and Chellapathi. We walked up several times from Tirupathi to Tirumala (the walking time steadily increased from 2.5 hours Inti Munniswamy Naidu, Saraswathi Aunty and to 3 and then to 3.5, and finally to 4.5 hours on the last walk sometime in 1996). Satyanarayana; (below) Tirumala Some of these trips were enroute to Koduru, and to Chandragiri (Chowdepally) to visit Sampath Kumari and Ramakrishniahgaru.

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

The Buhari Hotel on Mount Road

Woodland’s Drivein located in the Horticultural Society’s park on Cathedral Road was another happening place for tiffin and breakfast. The coffee and dosas were really special, served with absolute charm by the waiters who had to run long distances with trays in hand to serve all items hot

Madras held many attractions, one of which was eating out. There were some nice restaurants in the 70s. Saturday was a vegetarian day and eating out was on the cards. A quaint restaurant on one of the busy by-lanes at the corner of Parry’s Corner was a favourite. Right next to Buhari’s on Mount Road (now Anna Salai) was Swapna, a restaurant that dished out both North and South Indian cuisine. There was Shanti Vihar in Luz Corner that offered sweetmeats and tiffin. Mughalai and Tandoori cuisine was at its best at Kwality and Gaylord. The Golden Bowl in Savera Hotel was an exciting place to eat, with its floor shows making me once again gaze at the underside of the table, with the parents around. It had gyrating, scantily clad women going around the circular ‘Bowl’. Restaurant culture was in its infancy as far as the décor and service went. Queen’s restaurant was a favourite for Chinese food. Dad liked the Muniyandi Vilas cooking style and we would do the rounds with tiffin carriers to pick up this type of food from Velus, a favourite with the Tamil film stars. Buhari was popular for Biryani and Ceylon Paratha, not to forget the tall glass of Peach Melba and Fruit Salad, as well as for a night meal after catching a late movie at a cinema theatre—Casino, Shanti, Anand or New Elphinstone. Bilal was famous for Appam and Paya (trotters). Jafar’s Ice-cream Parlour at Elphinstone Circle could give Baskin Robbins a run for their money. Woodland’s Drive-in located in the Horticultural Society’s park on Cathedral Road was another happening place for tiffin and breakfast. The coffee and dosas were really special, served with absolute charm by the waiters who had to run long distances with trays in hand to serve all items hot. The waiters never changed and we knew them all by name. Hotels didn’t have star ranking in the sixties and seventies and, but for a few like Connemara, did not boast great meals. The exception was the New Woodlands Hotel which offered ‘Thali meals’. Hotel Ganpat had a great Chinese menu. Cakes and Bakes café (still exists) dished out pastries and sandwiches along with the chicken salad that was my favourite. Madras was yet to make an appearance on the pastry map, until The Taj Coromandel Hotel opened in 1974 and the Chola Hotel a year later. They had good restaurants as well, like Mercara, Golden Dragon and Sagari.

Shopping in Madras The two most iconic and popular shopping destinations were Spencer’s and Moore Market, which held different attractions. Spencer’s, Madras’ first department store, 67

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was housed in a grand old building worthy of conservation and being classed as heritage. It was burned to the ground in 1983. Spencer’s started in 1864 and became one of the biggest department stores in Asia. One of the most iconic landmarks of Old Madras, the original building was built by the British. In 1987 work started on the construction of the building that exists now—Spencer Plaza. The mall was constructed in four phases, with the final phase completed in 2001. Spencer Plaza has lost its distinction in the past few years, as the mall is no longer a part of the mall-map in Chennai, having been overtaken by fancier ones. The iconic Spencer’s

Moore Market was a priceless heritage building, which burned down mysteriously. It was located next to another of Madras’ beautiful old structures, Central (railway) Station. For many residents of Madras, a trip to Moore Market was a weekly attraction. It was heaven for old book enthusiasts, and for people wanting to buy exotic birds and animals, even leopards in the old days.

Movie weekends were great and the footfall in those days was exciting to watch. It was always a pleasure to be greeted by the President or one of the committee members. On special occasions dancing to a live band was a nice way to spend the evening

There were Bata and Vassons for footwear. Men’s readymade clothes had just made an appearance with Raymond’s, but custom-made clothes for both ladies and gents continued to be in great demand. I recall that my first suit was made of some really fine material at Syed Bawker’s on Clubhouse Road near the Connemara junction. Shopping for fabric and clothes was great fun at Chellarams and India Silk House at one end of Mount Road (now Anna Salai). Zodiac shirts in various colours were a favourite. Nalli’s and Radha Silks were saree and silk shops, which the ladies loved. My mother’s favourite place for exclusive handwoven and hand block printed cotton sarees was Varnali run by Kausalya Aunty (now our neighbour in Kodaikanal). Another famous shop, in the years when these types of shops were few and far between, was Bombay Halwa House for all the mithais and karras. Today we have Gangotri, Sri Mithai, and Grand Sweets… the list goes on. Until The Mithai Shop was opened in ITC’s Hotel Chola, the only places for birthday cakes and pastries were Bosotto Bros and MacRennet.

Life at the Madras Gymkhana Club We were members of the Madras Gymkhana Club and enjoyed the facilities it offered. We resided in the Fort St. George, just a stone’s throw from the statue of stirrup-less horseman Sir Thomas Munro. 68

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

Moore Market, Madras …It was the brainchild of Lt Col Sir George Moore, President of the Corporation of Madras in the 1890s. He was of the view that a market at a central location would solve two problems— get rid of the old and insanitary market off Broadway and provide a home for hawkers who sold their wares at a place called Guzili Bazaar between Memorial Hall and Central Station. The foundation stone for the building was laid by Sir George in August 1898 and the completed structure was thrown open to the public by Governor Sir Arthur Havelock in November 1900. The design was by R.E. Ellis and the contractor was A. Subramania Aiyar. The architecture was IndoSaracen and the market occupied 40,000 sq. ft. It took its name from Sir George Moore. Located as it was between Central Station and Victoria Public Hall, it soon proved to be exceedingly popular. V. Sriram

It was an enjoyable experience to go swimming at the club. At times Uncle Kapoor was there, instructing all the lovely gals in water ballet. Having learnt to swim in school, it was always nice to cool off after a game of tennis on the clay courts. Movie weekends were great and the footfall in those days was exciting to watch. It was always a pleasure to be greeted by the President or one of the committee members. On special occasions, dancing to a live band was a nice way to spend the evening. The foxtrot of Lovedale stood me in good stead till the dancing started changing with times. Considering the background of my parents, they were pretty liberal, but my mother would fix curfew times and await my return. I was a disciplined son and tried on most occasions to honour her timings. I will always recall the Madras Gymkhana Club Monthly Programme arriving by post in a manageable sized booklet that could fit in a wallet. What Sandip Roy wrote about his impressions of a famous Calcutta Club would apply also to the clubs in Madras. “The British left India in 1947, but they left behind quite a bit of baggage—starchy clubs with antiquated jacket-and-tie dress codes completely unsuitable for Indian weather, a passion for cricket and English and Anglicized names.” 69

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The Statue of Sir Thomas Munro It has been standing for 173 years, watching over the changing topography of Madras that is Chennai. It is the oldest statue standing in the open in our city. Legend has it that the sculptor Sir Francis Chantrey, upon realising that he had created an equestrian statue sans saddle or stirrups, committed suicide. But that is just a myth for Chantrey died of a heart disease. There are, however, several other interesting facts about this statue. Though Munro died in 1827 and the sculptor was commissioned to execute the statue immediately thereafter, it was only in 1838 that it was completed and shipped. It was erected in 1839. Chantrey found sculpting statues with animals a challenge and so took his time in identifying a suitable model for the horse. It was finally one from King George IV’s stable that finally fitted the bill. It was to be used for equestrian statues of the King and also the Duke of Wellington, thereby becoming the most modelled horse in history... V. Sriram in The Hindu newspaper

The General Officer Commanding, Southern Command, was Maj. Gen. Prakash Singh Grewal. He was a good friend of my father, who recognised my father’s ability to deliver and meet commitments to the government

The food at the Gymkhana Club was never disappointing. Introduction of tandoori cooking had just commenced in the late sixties. Western and Continental cuisine was what the Club excelled at: Roast Chicken, Almond Soup, Fish and Chips (a signature dish), Baked Corn, Egg Orly, Chicken Villeroy and desserts like Trifle, Layered Biscuit Pudding, Bread Pudding and not forgetting their signature dish, Pineapple Passion. The repertoire of short eats and snacks increased with time, along with the cost. Our favourites were fish fingers, malai kebabs, and chicken and cheese sandwiches. Chinese and Thai cuisine made its appearance in the 90s together with a variety of biriyanis. No longer is entertainment restricted to weekly movies and the occasional evening of dancing. The Club nowadays gets fancy performers with sophisticated music systems, who are paid an appropriately fancy fee. The annual Diwali Nite with a fireworks display, and New Year’s Eve continue to be events on the calendar to look forward to.

Life in Madras During my father’s time in Madras, the General Officer Commanding, Southern Command was Maj. Gen. Prakash Singh Grewal. He was a good friend of my father, who recognised my father’s ability to deliver and meet commitments to the government. 70

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

The Madras Gymkhana Club

… The club was founded in April 1884. Early membership was restricted to garrison members, British executives and some upper-caste Indians. A tent was erected, and early activities included polo and pigsticking. The Raja of Venkatagiri donated a grandstand. In addition to playing polo, members began trap shooting and playing cards, rugby, tennis and golf. The South Indian rajas made donations for buildings, billiard tables and polo ponies. The club’s history is intertwined with the history of India. Although an ordinance expelled its German members at the onset of the First World War, the club later learned that most of the German settlers had already fled. Women were allowed to join the club. A bowling green was established, along with a ballroom in the paddock. Dance nights concluded with grand suppers, where dancers were photographed. A swimming pool was built, at which the American Olympic gold medallist Sammy Lee performed a diving exhibition. The club kitchen was upgraded with an ice-making plant, an ice–cream machine and freezer. A miniature golf course was built, and the bar was renovated. … Originally on the Island Grounds, the golf course was moved to Guindy around 1887. It originally had nine holes before increasing to 14, 16 and 18 holes. … Wikipedia

The Chief Engineer was initially Brig. M.A. Nayudu (whose family we knew. Ranadhir Nayudu was my classmate at the College of Engineering, Guindy, and now lives in Los Angeles, and his sisters live in England). Brig. Chauhan replaced him. A quiet officer, he had no airs about him. He was eventually replaced by Brig. Chhachhi, a towering Sikh officer with two beautiful daughters, Amrita (Dimple) and Sheeba. My father’s work involved plenty of travel. On one occasion, the Brigadier tried to tick my father off in typical army style, asking him to report to him at 6 o’clock in the morning. My father, “Saidapet Raja”, did not have the appetite to stomach the 71

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reprimand and openly defied the senior officer, and fortunately the matter was settled amicably. I cannot print what I was told. Brig. Chhachhi’s respect for my father grew as time went by. Once, they were both returning from a trip to Wellington in the Nilgiris by train. At Erode, Brig. Chhachhi unceremoniously threw an unreserved passenger out of the reserved first class compartment for four. That passenger must have been a local politician, and in no time formed a large group to lynch the Brigadier. The Brigadier did not understand Tamil and it was my father’s intervention in Tamil that saved the day for the Brigadier, and the train was allowed to proceed. This incident brought the two of them closer. The contractors who executed the projects for Dad always had something nice to say about his compassionate ways, but they dreaded getting on his wrong side as far as the quality of work was considered. They appreciated his dynamism to expedite the projects.

The GOC at the inauguration of a new facility, 1969

Our neighbour at the Fort St. George was a Brig. Jind who had a son and a daughter (Angela). Brig. Jind was one of the very lucky nine male survivors of the air crash of the 40 who travelled on the Avro 748 flight from Trivandrum to Madras on 9 December 1971. Brig. Jind told me he survived because he was seated in the rear of the aircraft and had his safety belt secured at the time of the accident. We got our first pet, Gina, a crossbred Pomeranian, in 1968-69 from Geetha’s friend Roopa. (Gina incidentally was the name of the daughter of Nilima Malhotra). We travelled with her everywhere we went. We even made a boat trip to Abhay Naidu’s island near Tada, Nellore District. That day, we went fishing with live prawns as bait. Even before my hook and line had time to sink, I was reeling in an 8-kg Bekti. We caught two fish. Naidu’s resort was used by fishing enthusiasts, mainly diplomats. After some 13 years, one Deepavali day in Chennai in the early eighties, we left the door inadvertently open. Once the decibel level of the fireworks increased, Gina bolted out 72

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

Left: With Gina Centre: Parents with Gboy Right: Mum with Pussyboy

Fort St. George was close to Georgetown and we often found ourselves meandering through by-lanes and narrow streets with my mother. The various streets specialised in different types of goods

of the house never to be seen again, probably someone else’s gain. A very sad way to see a pet go after so many years of love and affection. My sister’s friends were my friends. Names I can recall are Roopa, Hema, Geetha, Uttara, and Bimbo (from Fiji). At the time of writing this memoir, I managed to trace Roopa in Chennai and Uttara in the USA. Hema I understand left at a rather early age for the heavenly abode. I must make an admission that I secretly harboured an affection for Hema. May her soul RIP.

Georgetown – Where it all began for Madras Fort St. George was close to Georgetown and we often found ourselves meandering through by-lanes and narrow streets with my mother. The various streets specialised in different types of goods. Kasi Chetty Street and Burma Bazaar were the places in which to squander money on imported goods brought in by smugglers. Ratna Café, Ambi’s Café, Ramkrishna Lunch Home, Coronation Durbar, Modern Café, Arya Bhavan, and Andhra Mess restaurants were known for tiffin and crisp samosas. In Georgetown was Armenian Street, where my mother would visit—every Tuesday, St. Columbus’s Church—to light a candle, praying for a bridegroom for her daughter being a priority. Sloane’s Square was where the transportation companies were located. Vegetables, fruits and provisions were got and delivered by Empire Stores in Parry’s. 73

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With Lt. Gen. Loomba (Engineer-in-Chief ) and Brig. Chhachhi (Chief Engineer), Madras 1970 74

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Left: Visit to Wellington with Lt. Gen. Loomba, 1969; and right: Laying the foundation stone of the Chief Engineer’s Office, Madras, 1969

Dad on his transfer from Madras, an honour reserved for Army personnel, 1971 75

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George Town, Madras/Chennai Madras was founded 375 years ago for trading purposes and those beginnings in Fort St. George were dependent on what could be supplied by the first ‘Black Town’, where the High CourtLaw College campus now is. After the French occupation and siege of Fort St. George, between 1746 and 1759 in two separate periods, this Black Town was razed and a new Black Town was developed north of Esplanade Road, now called N.S.C. Bose Road. This New Black Town continued to be the main supplier of goods to the merchants of the Fort, ‘White Town’, and, after being renamed George Town in 1911, a major importer of goods apart from prospering on exports. Befitting that importance, George Town grew at a hectic pace, becoming more and more congested, a trapezoid-shaped area criss-crossed with narrow parallel streets creating a gridironpatterned area. And in these streets business flourishes on the ground floors of buildings nearly a century old and wealthy merchants live comfortably on the upper floors. All this causes congestion unbelievable on weekdays and life that throbs only a little less on late evenings and weekends. S. Muthiah in The Hindu newspaper

Madras – Friends and Relatives Our immediate relatives were my Uncle K.S. Srinivasan, Uncle S.P. Narendran and S.R. Bhaskar and their families. Uncle Srinivasan (the Krishnamagaru clan), a retired Chief Engineer (TNEB), had three sons and a daughter: Ramesh (graduate of a US University) and his wife Sujatha are settled in San Jose, California with their daughter Esha. Ramesh was a great help in assisting the family in getting our son, Venkat home on a flight from San Francisco to Chennai on the Christmas weekend in 2015. He went from pillar to post, from the Coroner’s office to the Funeral home and to the Consulate in San Francisco to get Venkat home. He even had Venkat’s personal belongings shipped to Rukmini in Charlottesville. During our visit to San Francisco in 2016, he drove us around to Venkat’s home and we said a prayer at the spot where Venkat fell. We met up with Venkat’s room-mates, Christian and Shawn. We also had the pleasure of meeting Venkat’s Sishya classmate Dhanya and Venkat’s work colleagues, Laura and Cynthia at Landor. We drove to Los Gatos to meet Arun Kumar (LSL 1968) 76

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

Top: The family meet in Chennai, 2019 Below: The Krishnamagaru Clan in Toronto (l-r) Vivek & Padmaja, Sujatha & Ramesh, Venkatesh & Leela, and Dharmesh & Sujatha

and his wife Poornima to thank him for his intervention at the SF Consulate and also to meet Dipak and Radha the parents of Jhumki. Thank you, Ramesh. We are deeply indebted to you and your family. Padmaja (Ramesh’s daughter) and Vivek are settled in Toronto, Canada, along with their children Prashanti and Vicky. Vivek is an IIM Bangalore alumnus. Dharmesh (Ramesh’s son) graduated from a US University) and lives with his wife Sujatha and their children Varun and Shreya in Kitchener, Canada. Venkatesh (Ramesh’s eldest son) and Leela his wife live in Chennai. I had the wonderful opportunity to meet everybody at Dharmesh’s daughter’s arangetram in July, 2017 in Toronto. The Sathavalli Clan of Uncle Narendra comprised of Usha Aunty and their children Sai Kishore and Madhu. Dr. Sai Kishore and his wife Dr. Latha run a successful 40-bed private hospital. They have two sons, Tanuj and Teja. Usha Aunty passed away in her midfifties. Madhu and Sanjeev live in Bangalore with their daughter Manasa. Sanjeev, an entrepreneur, has carved out a niche for himself in the audio-visual field. A bike enthusiast, he has a collection of three Ducati bikes. 77

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Top: The 60th birthday of Vivek and Padmaja celebrated at Thirukadiyur, Tamil Nadu January 18, 2018 Right: Shreya at her arangetram, Toronto, July 2017

Uncle Narendran with Dr. Sai and Dr. Latha, Sanjeev and Madhu and kids, Chennai 2019

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

Sathavalli Bhasker and Sashi have two sons and a daughter. Kiran, their eldest son, is married to Lalitha and they are blessed with a daughter, Dakshita. Jai (Bhaskar’s 2nd son) and Leela live in Chennai. Deepa (Bhaskar’s daughter), Naresh and their daughter Roshini also live in Chennai. Just a 6-hour drive from Madras, Bangalore was our favourite city. We would drive down the old Chittoor-Palamaner road, stopping by to visit relatives, and Maj. Narayanswamy in Ranipet. In Bangalore, we normally stayed at the the MES (Military Engineering Services) Inspection Bungalow located in a very convenient corner of Brigade Road. The location allowed us access to all the eating places on Brigade Road and nearby. There were some exciting retaurants run by the Bollywood star, Sanjeev Kumar, and there were Koshy’s and Gaylord. I always looked forward to visiting some nice Udipi Hotels for breakfast. The dosas, idlis and

S.R. Bhasker and family at Jai’s vadas were out of the world. When time permitted, we would drive down to Lal Bagh wedding, Chennai February 15, 2013 to eat tiffin at Mavalli Tiffin Rooms (which later became the famous MTR brand). We

would shop for footwear, clothing and more on Commercial Street Dad had a lot of friends and relatives in Bangalore, Col. Rai, Col. Udappa and Col. Ethiendra Naidu being some we visited. We sometimes stayed with Uncle Rajagopal Naidu and Aunty Sarojini on Castle Street. Uncle Rajagopal had a beautiful mansion built in the old traditional style with wooden facias and cornices. It was a heritage building and I wish his heirs had preserved it for posterity. Alas, later owners of the property chose to bring it down and put up a monstrosity in modernity. Uncle Rajagopal was a portly, grand old man whose dress habits would shame even the English, always suited with a tie and shoes that shone to mirror his face, and with braces to hold up his trousers. He never stepped out of the house without his felt Fedora. In keeping with his style, he had a brand new car imported from the USA, a Hudson. His clipped accent was always a pleasure to hear. Aunty was always well draped in beautiful sarees, particularly handlooms from Venkatagiri. Their visits to Madras had us feasting on biryani and badam halwa at the Cosmopolitan Club. 79

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Wedding of Murali and Bhujamma, with my parents and Aunt and Uncle Rajagopal Naidu, Bangalore 1972

My regret was that I was unable to find him a Fedora in Singapore when he asked for one, and another time to get medicines from the USA for my aunt who was suffering from cancer (for lack of a local doctor’s prescription). Auntie’s hospitality had no bounds. She was a gracious host and always cared for our needs, always addressing my father as Govindu and my mother as Baby. Her signature dishes were the yellow coloured Thair Vada (Aama Vada), Paal Puri, Pulihar Annam, and there was never a shortage of bread, butter and jam at breakfast. Uncle and Aunty had no children of their own, and their foster children were indeed fortunate. We are still in touch with some—Bhasker Rao and Vidyulata, Murali and Bhujamma, Babu, Murali Snr. and Indira, and Geetha and Ravi. I had my first flight on an Indian Airlines Avro 748, to see them in Bangalore, in 1972.

Visiting the Bhasker Raos and the Muralis, Bangalore

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

Dad was very good at public relations and always maintained contact with people. He has helped a lot of people on their journeys to fame. My father made it a point to be in touch with relatives, rich or poor, and he earned their respect for his straightforward and helpful ways

Dad was very good at public relations and always maintained contact with people. He has helped a lot of people on their journey to success. My father made it a point to be in touch with relatives, rich or poor, and he earned their respect for his straightforward and helpful ways. We frequently had Dharani Mama and Purushotham Mama visiting us at the Fort residence. Dharani Mama and Susheela Aunty were well loved. In fact, Susheela Aunty helped us when our kids were born. Purushotham Mama was a conservative, religious man. He visited often, bringing tidings from the Parthasarthy Temple in Triplicane, of which he was on the governing committee. Indraniamma and her husband along with their children come to mind, relatives who lived in Bombay. Other relatives that I remember are Shakuntalamma (a DMK functionary) and her grandson who is settled in the USA; and Ranga Mama, Vishalamma and their children. S.S. Venugopal achieved a diploma in Chemical Engineering and went on to become a sought after Consultant. A distant relative Dharanipathy, whom my father helped find a job, was always by the family for all its needs until his passing. His son Vinod is an architect and a Freemason. The relatives on my mother’s side were very few. Aunty Jamuna Bai, who met us occasionally, lived in Delhi. She held a high position in the Andhra Mahila Sabha, and worked with Durgabai Desmukh. She and her sister, Kamala Bai in Madras, were my Radha Bai Avva’s father’s sister’s daughters. There were others—Chinna Baby and Pedda Baby were relatives of my maternal grandfather. Our relatives in Koduru were the families of Thota Kondiah and Thota Chenniah. My father and Kondaiah’s son Amarendra eventually sold all the land over the next decade. A court case against the Government of Andhra Pradesh remains for 15 acres of land in Settigunta. My uncle Srinivasan’s friend Rangarajan, who operated out of a small workshop near the Wellington Cinema in Madras, made his first big break through an order with Ashok Leyland for cylinder pistons, helped by Dad’s association with the company’s senior executives. Rangarajan never looked back and today is the owner of schools and colleges in the Avadi area.

Madras – Cinema Talking of cinemas, it was quite a pastime in Madras. We saw a lot of Telugu movies at Select Cinema located deep in Georgetown. We had to plan our adventure well in advance in order to navigate the crowded streets and find a parking spot. Movies were shown in Midland, Rajkumar, Emerald, Star, Minerva, Kamadhenu, Sun Theatre, Paragon Talkies (probably named at a time when silent movies became talking movies, or ‘talkies’), Broadway, Devi Complex, Anand Theatre and Shanti, with most of them later having come under the axe to make way for “progress”. 81

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The Veecumsee Multiplex, Madras/Chennai Considered to be the first multiplex in India with one big screen and two smaller screens Blue Diamond and Emerald, the theatre complex opened to the public in 1964. The total area of the complex was 40,365 sq. The first screening on the wide screen was ‘Cleopatra’ starring Richard Burton, Rex Harrison and Elizabeth Taylor. Other popular English movies like ‘Sound of Music’, ‘My Fair Lady’, ‘Lawrence of Arabia’, ‘Patton’, ‘Dr. Zhivago’, ‘Dr. Doolittle’ were all screened and enjoyed great patronage of the public. Watching a movie in Safire was an experience in the hall of nearly 1000 seats capacity and the wide large curved scene and the special Todd-AO sound system used to give the impression of being amidst the action on the screen. … Later, Safire screened Hindi and Tamil movies too. MGR-Jaylalithaa starrer ‘Kanni Thai’ and later Shashi Kapoor-Sharmila Tagore ‘Aa Gale Lag Ja’ are in my memory. … they exhibit Tamil movies for reduced rates. Kamalhassan’s ‘Maro Charitra’ (Telugu, 1978) and ‘Kokila’ (Kannada,

The Film Industry … During the 1920s, silent Tamil-language movies were shot at makeshift locations in and around Chennai, and for technical processing, they were sent to Pune or Calcutta. The Modern theatre studio was the first studio in Chennai. Silent movies were produced in Kollywood since 1916 and the era of talkies dawned in 1931. By the end of the 1930s, the industry was booming to the extent that the State of Madras legislature passed the pioneering Entertainment Tax Act 1939 with little opposition. … By the mid-1940s, Chennai became the hub of Studio activity with two more movie studios built in Chennai, Vijaya Vauhini Studios and Gemini Studios. Later, AVM Studios shifted its operations to Chennai (from Karaikudi). Thus, with the undivided Madras Presidency being the Capital to most of South India, Chennai became the centre for Tamil- and notable Telugu-language movies. The studios owners also found that it was more paying to turn their studios into real estate like apartments, hospitals and shopping complexes. Sify.com

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

1977) were screened here as noon shows. … There used to be four shows in this small hall per day. Blue Diamond after screening old English movies initially shifted to continuous shows from morning 9 o’clock or so; a person who buys a ticket can keep sitting till the theatre closes by the midnight. … Madras Desk … The Veecumsee family, jewellers from Kutch, moved south in the late 19th century. Devendra Veecumsee, along with his father and two brothers, bought the land and put up the complex in the aftermath of the Gold Control Act which restricted their operations. By 1969, the theatre’s popularity had grown and 16 others entered into a partnership with the family. In 1982, one of the partners, Ketan Shah, moved the high court for dissolution of the partnership and sought a direction that the land and building be sold. This was granted and a receiver appointed to sell the assets. Devendra, who wanted to retain the property with the family and is believed to have even offered to buy out the others, appealed against the sale, but this was turned down in July. The court issued advertisements for the sale and the AIADMK sent in an offer of Rs. 6.12 crore, a little above the court’s lowest price of Rs. 6 crore.” Nirupamam Subramaniam, freelance writer in a blog (Devendra and Jyothi were personal friends of my family.)

I fondly remember only the Safire Complex. The impressions of bloggers whose views I share are in the inset.

We saw a lot of Telugu movies at Select Cinema located deep in Georgetown. We had to plan our adventure well in advance in order to navigate the crowded streets and find a parking spot

Madras became a centre for cinema production. The terms Kollywood, Tollywood, Mollywood, etc. are only a recent creation (15-20 years). Madras had the reputation of producing Tamil, Hindi and vernacular movies in the numerous studios that existed in those days, which have sadly, as with the rest of the city’s heritage, dwindled in time, from 21 studios to the current 2 (AVM and Prasad Studios) During his tenure, Dad got to make good friends with some of his doctors, notably Dr. V. Ganesan, Dr. Rangabashyam, Dr. N.P. Srinivasulu (a relative), Dr. Jayachandran, Dr. Ramachandran and Dr. Salim Thomas (son of my old school Principal “KIT” Thomas). Dad was a diabetic and had a heart condition that required him to take Sorbitrate occasionally. My mother maintained her health and was never a cause for concern. There were no corporate hospitals in the early days. VHS (Voluntary Health Services) Hospital, St. Isabel Nursing Home, Kalyani Hospital and other nursing homes and hospitals run by industrial groups existed. Our family lawyer was Thanikachalam, and he drew up my father’s will. Bapalal and Co. were our family jewellers for three generations. Mr. Chellapa was our auditor for years, followed by his son Ramesh after him. 83

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Geetha weds Ratna Rao My father’s colleague, Uncle Mohan Rao and his wife Lakshmi were our good friends. They introduced us to the family into which Geetha eventually got married in 1972. Pulakandam Ratna Rao became my brother-in-law. An Osmania University engineering graduate and a dynamic marketing executive, he headed a Bombay based company called Fouress Engineering Pvt. Ltd. in the plush office-cum-residence, off Barakhamba Road, New Delhi. I had the opportunity to visit my prospective brotherin-law in New Delhi and also got to see my first Republic Day Parade (January 1972). My father had just received his transfer—S.O.1. (Planning) to the Director General Naval Projects in Visakhapatnam.

Mom was an astute organiser and knew exactly what she wanted. She even had the mehendi lady, the bangle seller and the paanwala at the The family was in a quandary about when and where to perform my sister’s marriage. mandap—a novel idea My uncles, C. Sanjeevi and K.S. Srinivasan were there as pillars to support my parents in conducting the wedding despite the posting. Getting a hall for a marriage was a in those days nightmare at short notice. There were only two large reputed halls—Abbotsbury and AVM Rajeshwari Kalyana Mandapam. Mandapams were just beginning to grow as a real estate business. There were no event managers or caterers like you have today. It was just the hall. We managed to get the AVM Kalyana Mandapam in Madras. My uncles managed the rest, from accommodation, to the cooks, the floral decorators, the transportation and everything else, right to listing and purchasing the ingredients that the cooks needed. It was a job splendidly done, mostly at the direction of my mother with my father being Master Planner, his forte.

Chakrapani Rao and Manikyamma in London

Mom was an astute organiser and knew exactly what she wanted. She even had the mehendi lady, the bangle seller and the paanwala at the mandap—a novel idea in those days. It was a grand wedding that went off well, with functions at our home on Maharaja Surya Rao Road as well as in the wedding hall. I recall all the ladies from our side of the family, draped in identically designed Kanjeevaram sarees, being photographed on the mandap lawns. The wedding was held on 28 February 1972. Video cameras had not made their entrance at that time, but a professional photographer, combined with our personal photographs and an 8mm movie camera that Dad had owned from the early days, recorded the event for posterity. The couple left by the Grand Trunk Express to New Delhi from the Madras Central Station (now the MG Ramachandran Central Station), after a honeymoon in Ootacamund. 84

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Wedding of Geetha and Ratna Rao, 1972

My sister’s acquired family by marriage: My brother-in-law P. Ratna Rao was one of six children. Their father P. Chakrapani Rao Garu was a giant of man, both physically and in the way he brought up his children. He was the Headmaster of a school, and a landlord in Rudravaram, Krishna District, who along with wife Manikyamma commanded respect from all quarters. They were made for each other. The eldest of the six siblings, B.V. Ram Mohan Rao (an advocate in Hyderabad) married Varalakshmi; he is followed by the Late P.V. Radhakrishna Rao (a consultant civil engineer by profession) who married Ramakrishna; then came Surya Prakash Rao (Retd. Director of Indian Oil) and his wife Ammaji; Dr. P. Chakrapani Rao (a former Wing Commander of the IAF) came next, and lives with his wife Usha in a suburb of Upstate New York); the Late P. Ratna Rao (Marketing) married my sister Geetha; their only sister Vijayalakshmi (also Ammaji) married Dr. C.H.V. Rao and they live in USA; and the youngest sibling P.V. Gandhi married Bhavani. They all have children living, married and working in the USA and India. 85

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Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

My mother with Geetha’s friends at the wedding, February 28, 1972

Ratna and Geetha dropped in on me during my project work in Jakarta in 1992, on their return from New Zealand and Australia

My brother-in-law Ratna Rao had a wonderful career with Fouress, selling industrial valves, before leaving the job after 10 years in order to further his education. He and my sister left for the Catholic University, Leuven, Belgium, where my brother-in-law completed an MBA in Marketing. They were devout devotees of Puttaparthi Sathya Sai Baba and led the student centre in bhajans. They have two kids—Vandhana was born 18 March 1973 in St. Georges Hospital, Visakhapatnam, delivered by Dr. Satyabhama Reddy; and Vipin on 7 September 1976 in New Delhi. Both children were left with my parents for a period of four years, when Geetha and Ratna Rao lived in Belgium. Ratna Rao worked for the Murugappa Group in Croydon, England, and in New Delhi, leaving them for Thapars and thereafter Oberois. At a point in the 90s, he decided to set out on his own, carrying out imports and exports. He made a name for himself in India, representing European companies selling textile equipment and fabric finishing machinery. This required hard work and frequent travel abroad and within India. I recall his brilliance in selling Mohan Meakin’s ‘Old Monk’ rum to the Kiwis. Ratna and Geetha dropped in on me during my project work in Jakarta in 1992, on their return from New Zealand and Australia. I took them to Bali during their stay. Whilst Ratna Rao was busy at work, my sister had her circle of friends in Delhi with bhajan groups, kitty parties and various other interests. 87

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Geetha and Ratna Rao in London

With Gandhi and nieces and nephews in Hyderabad

With nieces and nephews in Hyderabad

Vipin and Vandhana in Delhi

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

Wedding of Vandhana and Seshu Baireddy, Chennai 1999

Vandhana did her B.Com. degree and worked for some time with Standard Chartered bank till wedding bells rang for her. Vandhana married Seshu Baireddy son of Padmanabhiah (Executive Director of BHEL in Ramchandrapuram, Hyderabad) and Kasturi on 30 June 1999 at the Woodlands Hotel in Chennai. Vandhana and Seshu moved to the USA and have three children: Padmashree “Chintu” (currently doing premedical studies at the Arizona State University), Ratnashree “Mintu” (preparing to go to Berkeley for her medical programme) and Shree (Lulu). Vandhana and Seshu live in Sioux Falls, South Dakota where Seshu heads an Information Technology Company. We had the opportunity to visit them during a trip to see my daughter Rukmini in 2019. They were the perfect hosts. We made a dream run to the Yellowstone Park, The Crazy Horse Monument, Mount Rushmore, Dream Run courtesy Vandhu and Seshu, 2019 The Dead Volcano, in all 2000 miles up and down, 89

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Top: Vandhana and family at Mt Rushmore, USA after their naturalisation ceremony Bottom: Seshu, Lulu, Mintu, Chintu and Vandhana in their home in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, 2020 90

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a tremendous bit of driving. It was a wonderful trip and we were introduced to the Who’s Who of Sioux Falls over their wedding anniversary dinner hosted by them. Vipin studied in Delhi and completed his B.Com. He worked for some time with the Times group and then chose to go to New Zealand for higher studies. He did a Masters in International Business, worked for some time in Australia and New Zealand before returning to New Delhi. He started assisting his father in the export-import business that his father had developed over the years. Very unfortunately Ratna Rao passed away on 29 April 2014 at the Medanta Hospital in Gurgaon (now Gurugram).

S.O.1 (Planning), Director General Naval Projects, Visakhapatnam Getting back to my father’s career, my parents began to settle down in Visakhapatnam after the hectic fortnight in Madras for my sister’s wedding. Visakhapatnam was just growing in stature nationwide. Reproduced here are extracts from the website Visakha.in, which gives vivid details of the city.

Friends and family on the occasion of Vandhana’s birth, Vizag, 1973 91

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Visakhapatnam … Alternatively, it sometimes goes by its now mostly defunct colonial British name, Waltair. During the colonial era, the city had at its hub the Waltair railway station, and that part of the city still goes by the name of Waltair. It is also popularly referred to as “Vizag”, a shortening of its full name. It is sometimes also referred to as the “City of Destiny”. Visakhapatnam is also the headquarters of the Eastern Naval Command of the Indian Navy. …The city is home to several state owned heavy industries, and has one of the country’s largest ports and its oldest shipyard. It has the only natural harbour on the eastern coast of India. HPCL Oil Refinery (Hindustan Petroleum Corporation Limited), Visakhapatnam Steel Plant Rashtriya Ispat Nigam Limited (RINL) Vizag Steel Plant, Hindustan Zinc Limited, Bharat Heavy Plate and Vessels Ltd (BHPV), Hindustan Shipyard Limited, Visakhapatnam Port Trust, Coromandel Fertilizers, National Thermal Power Corporation, Rain Calcining Limited, Essar Pelletization Plant are all located in Vizag. …Vizag is also one of India’s main fishing ports, has a dedicated harbour for the fishing industry and handles a large percentage of India’s seafood exports. … Andhra University, a prominent seat of education in Andhra Pradesh, is located here. Another important landmark in the education map of Visakhapatnam is the Andhra Medical College (established 1902). …This city was ruled by several dynasties: the Kalingas during the 7th century, the Chalukyas during the 8th century, the Cholas, the Qutb Shahis of Golconda, the Mughal Empire and the Nizams of Hyderabad. In the 18th century, Visakhapatnam was part of the Northern Circars, a region of Coastal Andhra that came first under French control and later that of the British. From being a tiny fishing village in the nineteenth century, Vizag has grown into an industrial hub. In the 1970s and the 1980s the city grew rapidly with a lot of investment in the state-owned Hindustan Shipyard Limited, Vizag Steel and other major industries. visakha.in

Career: Part 2, 1967-1981

At the Director General Naval Projects, S.O.1 (Planning), he was involved in the nitty-gritty of working with Russians, who provided the design. The cantonment life of Ahmednagar and Babina was not in evidence, but socialising existed to some degree. We lived in a three-bedroom flat after having enjoyed independent villa type homes and the huge Robert Clive house in Fort St. George.

Portraits of Uncle Srinivasan and Aunt Lalitha and Below: Our home in Vizag

Adaptation was always the answer to this nomadic profession. We did pretty well at that. Visitors were regular, Visakhapatnam being closer to Hyderabad and Madras than Dad’s other postings. 1971 saw India at war with Pakistan and a lot of excitement off the Vizag harbour. The INS Rajput of the Indian Navy destroyed the Pakistani submarine Ghazi off the coast of Visakhapatnam. The entrance of the United States Navy’s 7th Fleet into the Bay of Bengal at the instruction of President Nixon and Mr. Henry Kissinger added to the excitement, which eventually fizzled out owing to the determined stand by India.

Vizag has some pleasant and unpleasant memories. My sister gave birth to her first child (1973) here as reported earlier. My aunt Lalitha Srinivasan, initially diagnosed with Tuberculosis, ended up with kidney failure. She died on 17 March, 1973. I was in Vizag, having just completed my B.E. (Hons). As my sister had just delivered, I rushed to Madras on behalf of the family, to be present at the funeral. My mother and aunt had grown up as sisters. My mother would share her jewellery or had even given it away to her. They had a very close bond. I was fond of my aunt but had little contact in view of my boarding school education. I was glad that during my college days I had taken her to a movie, Love Story by Eric Segal, at her 93

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Parents in Vishakapatnam, 1972

We were in Vizag when I made plans to go to the USA to study. I was the first in our family after my maternal grandfather Thota Ramkrishniah Chetty who went to England

request. The visit to Madras was heart-wrenching, seeing my uncle Srinivasan a widower with four young children. Radha Bai Avva was happy to be on her own as usual. Having been widowed at 22 years, she did not rely on or trust anyone, not even her own mother or daughter. This was by virtue of having been left alone in the village, even having to fend off burglars and thieves. My cousin S.R. Bhaskar, at the behest of my mother, chose a girl for himself—Sasikala, from Parvathipuram—and they got married in 1974. My father made official trips to Koraput in the Arakku Valley with some of the most amazing scenery of the valley decked with sunflowers. Arakku Valley has become a location for several holiday resorts now. As a budding civil engineer I got an opportunity to visit the BHPV plant, the Hindustan Shipyard, and the works at the DGNP. We were in Vizag when I made plans to go to the USA to study. I was the first in our family after my maternal grandfather Thota Ramkrishniah Chetty, who went to England, to head out of the country for studies. In 1974 my father was transferred to Jabalpur, and again it was my mother who had to struggle to get the packing done, certainly not an easy task. 94

Jabalpur, Madhya Pradesh Reminiscence

Jabalpur (formerly known as Jubbulpore, the official spelling until 2006) is a tier-2 city in the Indian state of Madhya Pradesh. … It is generally accepted that the game of Snooker originated here. … Historically, a centre of the Kalachuri and Rajgond dynasties, the city developed a syncretic culture influenced by intermittent Mughal and Maratha reigns. During the early nineteenth century, it was annexed by British India and renamed as Jubbulpore and incorporated as a cantonment town…. 16 June 1857 saw the kindling of a rebellion in the cantonment of Jubbulpore. The 1857 movement was started by the Gondwana king, Raje Shankar Shah Madawi and the prince Kunwar Raghunath Shah Madawi. Both were arrested and imprisoned, and executed on 18 September 1857. … The Jabalpur Cantonment is one of the largest cantonments in India. In addition to the ordnance factories, other organisations present in the city include HQ Madhya Bharat Area, College of Material Management, Central Ordnance Depot, 506 Army Base Workshop, Military Hospital, HQ Chief Engineer Jabalpur Zone, Military Dairy Farm, and HQ Recruiting Zone. Civilian organisations which are part of the Ministry of Defence are the Cantonment Board, Controller of Defence Accounts, Defence Standardisation Cell and the Canteen Stores Department. Vehicle Factory Jabalpur, Grey Iron Foundry, Gun Carriage Factory Jabalpur, and the Ordnance Factory Khamaria belonging to the Ordnance Factory Board manufacture bullets, howitzers, missiles, rockets, bombs, mines, mortars, grenades, shells, trucks, mine-protected vehicles and bulletproof vehicles for the Indian Armed Forces, the paramilitary forces of India, the Central Armed Police Forces, State Armed Police Forces and the Special Forces of India. These companies are the city’s primary employers. Allied organisations are the Directorate General of Quality Assurance (DGQA), responsible for the inspection of quality of equipment manufactured by the ordnance factories; the Central Ordnance Depot, which stores and supplies equipment and weapons for the armed forces; the 506 Army Base Workshop, which maintains equipment for the armed forces and the Defence Security Corps, responsible for guarding the ordnance factories. These organisations alone employ over 100,000 people. The production of Shaktiman trucks (MAN 415 L1 AR), Jonga (Jabalpur Ordnance and Guncarriage Assembly) Light Utility Vehicles and the Vahan 1 ton (Nissan 4W73 Carrier) began at the Gun Carriage Factory Jabalpur in 1959. It started manufacturing Shaktiman trucks with license from MAN SE of Germany along with Jonga and Vahan 1 ton under license from Nissan of Japan. All three of the above products have been retired and replaced by the new products. … Wikipedia Dad worked very closely with these organisations during his time in Jabalpur.

Reminiscence

Commander Works Engineer (CWE), Jabalpur My father was designated CWE (Commander Works Engineer) under the Headquarters Chief Engineer (Central Zone) in 1974. Jabalpur was a strategic military base.

Top and below: At an official function

The accommodation, built for officers of the British Raj, was excellent—a tiled house with a large lawn and a separate kitchen connected by a corridor. Radha Bai Avva found great freedom here. She visited town on her own. Her reference to return home was “Ridge Road Char Ghadi” (the 4-faced clock tower on Ridge Road). We now had 96

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Gina and G Boy as our pets. Mani, our domestic help from our days in Madras, was at hand to open the gates to let cars in at different times of the day. In the early 70s he chose to work with my parents. My mother trained him as a cook in Chettinad, Andhra, Punjabi and Chinese cuisine. In addition, he did all the household chores. My mother and Mani would roll out hot dosas, idlis and vadas to our army friends, who devoured the snacks and coffee. Dad had a great team of officers working under him. At the drop of a hat, moonlit potlucks were organised to the waterfalls or for boating on the Narmada River. Diwali was a great time to be in Jabalpur. My mother displayed her prowess at being a pokerfaced player at ‘Theen Pathi’ and made some great winnings, much to the dismay of a few.

Top: Relaxing on the beautiful lawns of our home in Jabalpur Bottom: Distributing prizes

Officers and their families that come to mind are Maj. Bagga and Kusum, Maj. Bhatia, Mehta, Ram Mohan Rao, Maj. Rao and Bharthi, Maj. Chopra and Uma, and Alkaji. My mother kept herself busy with Mahjong, Canasta and Rummy, and had a great set of friends, both in the services and amongst the civilian crowd. Some of them are Dhun Rajendra Singh (wife of a very famous criminal lawyer in Jabalpur), Mrs. Chajjhu Ram (wife of Gen. Chajjhu Ram), Rajesh (wife of Dr. Shankar), Mabel (wife of a Marine Engineer), Bindra (who incidentally is related to my engineering classmate’s wife Arshleen Aneja), and Malhotra (IOL) and his wife Guddi. The Narmada Club was the rendezvous point both for cards and socialising. My parents very seriously considered retiring in Jabalpur in view of the quality of their life and their friends, and with a little nudge that would have become a reality. Some of these friends visited my mother in Chennai after retirement. Hira Sweets was where mithai was bought, and ‘ganna juice’ (sugarcane) was another favourite in Jabalpur. 97

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Left: An official function Right: Driver Papa and my Dad’s Staff car

The Chief Engineer was R.D. Singh (Joshi was C.E. before him); the Deputy Chief Engineer was Col. Gulati, and his wife Nirmal was a very affable person. We visited Mr. R.D. Singh’s family in Bhilai and also in Delhi after his retirement. I enjoyed being with my father during his official trips. One such trip was to Saugor, where the 90,000 Pakistani prisoners of war were housed. Visits to the Vehicle Factory and Ordnance factory were enriching. We visited the National Tiger Reserve at Kanha, an exciting trip, but unfortunately ended up sighting only pug marks and tiger dung. The trip to Khajuraho was delightful and certainly opened up vistas for the imagination. The carvings were phenomenal. My mother recalls trips to ‘Prem Kutir’, the residence of the yesteryear actors Premnath and Bina Roy. Winters were pleasant in Jabalpur, though a bit cold.

Deputy Chief Engineer (DCE), Madras State, Karnataka, Andhra Pradesh, Kerala My father was posted to Madras (for the second time) on promotion as a Deputy Chief Engineer. Having served the country all over India, it was nice to have a home posting. My father visited works at Avadi, Tambaram, Arakonam, Wellington and other places. Instead of an official residence, they chose to stay in their own home—the second floor of No. 2 Maharaja Surya Rao Road, Alwarpet (the house that Subadhramma Avva had built and which my father had modernised). This was to be my parents’ 98

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address thereafter. We still had the MSL 5053, Hindusthan Ambassador. The 10.21 acres of land in Madambakkam that was bequeathed to my father by his father was beginning to attract Urban Land Tax and came under the Land Ceiling Act. We were absentee landlords, with a caretaker tilling the land and giving us rice bags twice a year. My father had a pumpset installed. He asked of me to take care of the land. I built a fence all round it and planted a combination of mango trees (Banganpalle variety from my mother’s village Koduru) and coconut trees from Kancheepuram (tall and dwarf ). We had a flourishing garden. My father in the interim took eleven years to have the Urban Land Ceiling (ULC) notice withdrawn in his favour. A born fighter and resolute, he very patiently made several trips to the ULC office in Chepauk, meeting each Commissioner that came and went. As soon as this was over, a notice to acquire the land by the Jal Vayu Vihar Housing Establishment was served on him. Even this he fought till he succeeded in having the acquisition notice withdrawn. Madras was less socially hectic than other stations. My mother had a few friends. My father was a member of the Madras Gymkhana Club and this provided a little respite in the summer heat of Madras. Uncle Top: Venkat on a bullock at the Srinivasan was a regular visitor along with Uncle Sanjeevi. During this period, my Madambakkam farm Below: The farm with mango, father, along with other classmates of his led by Prof. K.S. Hegde formed the Alumni coconut and teak trees Association for the alumni of colleges that came under the aegis of the University of Madras. The land designated for the Club, near the prestigious Boat Club, was craftily released from the clutches of the politicians of those years, who were seeking to locate the MLA Quarters there. My father and I became members of this club on its formation. 99

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Dad was very successful as the President of the College of Engineering Guindy Alumni Association and took active part in the activities of the Centre, ably assisted by Uncle Sanjeevi, Capt. Kuppu Rao Nowlay and Mumoorthy. The Old Boys of 1945 continued to meet regularly. Dad was an active member of the Naidu Sangham too and made contributions to the needy.

Top: At the Gymkhana Club with Narendran and Usha

What about “the house that Jack built”? With his retirement around the corner, Dad wanted to build on the plot he acquired in 1967 (three grounds for a princely sum of Rs. 7000 a ground). He got it built on his own with the assistance of his brother S.P. Narendran.

Above and facing page: Celebrating Dad’s promotion as Chief Engineer

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Chief Engineer (CE), Director of Designs, Engineer in Chief ’s Office, New Delhi

In his fnal posting in 1980 before retirement, my father was promoted to Chief Engineer. He was transferred to the Engineer in Chief ’s Office in New Delhi and held the responsibility of Director of Designs. His assignment was for a brief period before he retired to his home in Madras, and so, he stayed in the MES Inspection Bungalow in the Delhi Cantonment and did not feel the need to shift the whole family to Delhi. My father achieved his life’s ambition to reach the pinnacle of his office, which was no mean feat. Dad’s service in the Military Engineering Service (MES), which later became the Indian Defence Services Engineers (IDSE), commenced on the 06 August 1949 as an Assistant Executive Engineer in Khadakvasala, Poona, and saw completion as a Chief Engineer in New Delhi on 31 March 1981. Well done, Dad!

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6 Life after Retirement

y father glided into retirement without a problem, as he had already created a home at 2, Maharaja Surya Rao Road, Alwarpet. This was a blessing for my mother who saved herself two moves, from Madras to New Delhi, and back. The outstanding planner that he was, he did not have any problems in spending time in retirement as most would have. He had his routine chalked out. From visiting friends and relatives all over India and in particular Bangalore, Palamaner and Chittoor, to his visits to the Urban Land Ceiling offices and the Tamil Nadu Government offices to have his Madambakkam property delisted from gazetted acquisition. The Naidu Sangham, the formation of the College of Engineering Alumni Association, Class of 45 activities and the All India MES Pensioners Association, and relatives with their needs kept him busy. His daily visits to the Madras Gymkhana Club each evening to play bridge with his friends was an activity he never missed.

Celebrating Dad’s 80th birthday at Madras Gymkhana Club

Dad dressed according to the season. Come September, his attire changed. Gone were the summer bush shirts or long-sleeved shirts. He would dress as a dapper gentleman would. Different suits with elegantly matched coloured shirt and tie, with shoes that shone to make a garrison member proud. He wore his perfumes well. He and his Bridge partner Singaram would compare notes on their attire, “Dai Govinda, tie rombha nalla irku,”and Dad would in turn compliment Singaram. Bridge connected all of them. He would pick up Thirunakarsu and Somasundaram on his way to the club. Some of his 103

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friends were invited to his residence in Alwarpet for a luncheon (all cooked and served by my mother): Janaki Srinivasan, Malathi, and Pattu (they were our guests in Singapore), Thirunakarsu, Somasundaram, Col. Vijayaraghavan and his wife Chuddi, Vijayaraghavan, “Balu” Balasubramaniam, Eric Prabhakar and wife, the Lamechs, Santhanalakshmi and Kalyanasundaram (taught Beena and me Bridge at the Club), Bhaktavachalam, Rabi Rajarathnam and Dr. Shiela, and the Singarams. Other friends at the club were Pushpa, Kittu, Vindhya and Reddy, Behls and Ramalingams. My mother found different ways to keep herself busy in Madras. Her primary responsibility was to take care of her aging mother, Radha Bai Avva. She would dovetail all her programmes to ensure that she personally cooked and served the breakfast, lunch, tea and dinner for her mother. This would clash with programmes to the movies and the Club, but she knew where her priorities lay. She would ensure her mother had her quota of whisky or rum each evening, a habit acquired in Koduru with her barrister husband. She would play Mahjong, Canasta and Rummy with friends like Mrs. Reddy, Mrs. Nair and the GOC’s wife. My mother would go to the Engineers Mess at the Island Grounds where the army officers’ wives met for a coffee morning with Tambola, etc. Radha Bai Avva, like in Jabalpur, was on her own, visiting the Murugan Temple at Eldams Road and wherever else she fancied, to spend time the way she wanted. Radha Bai Avva breathed her last on 12 February 2000 at Alwarpet. Top: The family with Sr. Mariazinha and Sr. Margaret Centre: With the Rais in Bangalore Below: Celebrating Dad’s 80th with Singaram, Uncle Srinivasan, Bhaktavachalam and Col. Venkatadri, Chennai 2003

We were never short of celebrations at Alwarpet. It was either a birthday or wedding anniversary. My mother would lay out a spread for breakfast: idlis, masala dosas, paya curry (Trotters), fish curry and chicken curry, served hot, and she would use 104

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Left: With Prema and Jayaram Right: With the Potu Rao’s in Singapore, 1987 Below: (l to r) Neha, Kamlesh, Kavita and O.P. Kapoor in Chennai

the finest crockery and champagne glasses (filled with orange juice) followed by her signature gulab jamuns in syrup. It was an absolute delight. My mother has retained her culinary brilliance and we still get to enjoy her delicacies. My mother has been ordering chicken and mutton from Babuji for over 40 years to this day, and he has now diversified into supplying fish and prawns. Over the past years we started having birthday brunches at either the then Park Sheraton or the Grand Chola with a cake cutting, gifts, cards (which slowly disappeared along with handwritten notes). We prayed to our ancestors before Deepavali (the prayer is known as Devasham) and in particular to our step-grandmother who died a ‘sumangali’ (the

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wife going before the husband). Initially it was a three-day celebration and, with all the cousins, tots and elders, we were at least 30 in the household, spreading ourselves anywhere we found space. My mother toiled to feed the lot. As the children got married and with the passing of elders, the numbers thinned. Besides, many of us worked and getting leave was an issue. I could always judge the time by Padmaja’s arrival—she would land up at the right time when the puja was about to commence. Dr. Sai Kishore was always there, come what may after attending at the ICU of St. Isabel’s, and would offer his prayers and enjoy the ‘Elai Sapad’ (South Indian food served on a banana leaf ) and a signature payasam which Beena has learnt from my mother and mastered. With age, my mother had to take a back seat and watched Beena and Sasi do the honours, and after us, we are not sure who in the family will continue these traditions. Lakshmi Puja was another big event with friends and family.

Holidays Dad in particular, and with Mom in tow, enjoyed travel whether it was within India Top: Uncle Subramaniam and or overseas. By the time he retired he had practically visited all States and places of Aunty Lakshmi from the NDA interest within India, including a trip to the Andaman Islands. I became a member of days with the kids Sterling Holidays, and then Mahindra’s, timeshare holidays, a new concept in India Below: The Three Musketeers started in the late eighties and early nineties. As a family—Mom, Dad, Beena, Rohini, —Srinivasan, Sanjeevi and Dad Rukmini and Venkat—we made several trips to the Mahindra resorts at Kodaikanal and Munnar. Once I built a cottage in Kodaikanal, we dropped out of the timeshare. After Ratna Rao’s studies in Belgium, my parents, Ratna, Geetha, Vandhana and Vipin travelled across Europe in a Rest and Recreation (R &R) Camper. They went to Belgium, Luxembourg, England, France, Italy, Venice, Switzerland, Monte Carlo, Holland and Austria. There was some excitement in Italy with a theft from the camper. 106

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Top: Camper trip through Europe, Mum, Dad and Geetha’s family, 1982 Bottom: Visit of Parents, Radha Bai and Pattu, Singapore, 1987

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MALAYSIA

SYDNEY

PARIS

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USA

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NEW ZEALAND

MELBOURNE

MUTTUKADU, CHENNAI

BALI

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This trip called for a lot of courage and adventure. They planned it well, and also carried curry powders for an occasional curry or rasam to embellish the European fare. One time, my parents travelled through the North Americas visiting all the important cities. On another trip to England they went to Ireland and even visited Limerick (they met Sister Margaret’s brother there). Dad’s biggest regret was not going to South America and Russia. The Far East was well toured with trips to mainly Thailand, Hong Kong and Japan. On one of their several visits to Singapore, they made a trip to Australia and New Zealand. They went on a Mediterranean cruise covering Turkey, Greece, Israel and Jerusalem. Beena, Rukmini and my parents made a trip to Sri Lanka (and saw Hambanthota, which was wiped out in the tsunami that struck in December 2004). Dad and Mom made one of his last trips to the USA to visit Vandhana during the birth of her child. After Dad’s passing Mom has visited the USA, visiting both grandchildren in 2016, Vandhana and Rukmini. Mom went with my sister and nephew to Vietnam in 2017. Her spirit for overseas travel is waning now.

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CHAPTER

Reflections in the Mirror of Time

reproduce here my father’s summary of his life in a piece he contributed to the 2003 Alumni Book “Class of 45 Looking Back”. I have in places quoted anecdotes in the previous pages.

We salute you Dad, may your soul rest in peace. Om Shanti.

We entered the portals of the College of Engineering in June 1941 and we were the first batch to do the condensed course of 3 years of the B.E. degree. We were a set of students who right from the start had a very good understanding and stood united in all collegiate matters except one or two. I recall some of my experience in the College: The first incident was when we locked the classroom and did not allow the lecturer (Iyengar) into the classroom. After waiting for half an hour he reported the matter to the Principal, Dr.Rudra, the Principal forced the doors open, thanks to Chacko our colleague. He asked the lecturer to name anyone who is mischievous in the class and thereupon the lecturer readily gave my name. The Principal said I will be rusticated and thrown out of the college and should meet him at 1 pm at his chamber. The whole class struck work and when I went to the Principal, he did not meet me and asked me to get lost. I met the Lecturer, Mr.Iyengar casually one evening at the Marmalong bridge (Saidapet) on his way home. The episode ended without having to throw him into the Adyar River. We thereafter had an excellent rapport. As UTC students, we struck work and did not attend parades. Major Paul, our Commandant wanted to take disciplinary action against us. Dr. Rudra let us 111

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off, saying he is least interested whether we attend the Parade or not. After I completed the 4th session (Final Year) of our College, the Principal sent for me and told me that I had put in only 17 days attendance against 165 days required for sending my name to the University to sit for my final B.E. exam. I humbly requested him and my name was sent in. By God’s grace and with the kindness of Mr. K.S. Sitarama Iyer (my new Principal), I passed my B.E. I happened to be the last student of the University for that year in the B.E. Programme. The irony of life is that my son who studied in the same college passed B.E. (Hons) standing first in the University and won a Gold medal and other prizes. During the Quit India movement I was hauled up by the Saidapet Police and put in the station for carrying out harthal for stopping the students from attending classes. Once the students came to know that I was arrested and the whole college came to the station and the police had no option but to release me with a warning. Those were the Quit India days. I stood for the election of the Art Section Secretaryship and I can’t forget the help and support rendered by Bennet Pithavadian, Rangachari, Muthu and others. Though I was a day student, I never went home and stayed all the time in the hostel mostly in Rangachari’s room more for eating the excellent food in the mess. Each meal used to cost us 30 paise and the food was limitless. I still remember the time when I used to eat 10 gulab jamuns or 10 Mysore pak along with 6 to 8 vegetable cutlets. I never attended the regular classes as I was always involved in extra curricular activities and now wonder how I passed my B.E. In our days, we had the benefit of attending the Diploma examinations in addition to B.E. University exams. The Diploma exams were conducted by the College. Passing the Diploma was adequate enough to get a job in the Government and so I took it easy. 112

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Though not successful as a student I did well in the Military Engineering Services where I rose to the rank of Chief Engineer after being recruited as Assistant Garrison Engineer in 1949. For my stint of service in the department the senior officers and Generals in the Army nominated me for a “Padmasri” Award. During my service I served in Kashmir. Recalling an event, I was asked to classify a bridge which was Class-8 (8 tons) according to their books and they wanted me to check whether a Tank (80 Tons) can be carried over a bridge 300 ft single span over a river. Though I was not a brilliant student, I took the challenge to check the design and found the bridge could take a Tank one at a time although it was over stressed by 12.5% taking into consideration the factor of safety. I gave it in writing for tanks to go through. No credentials were given to a civilian officer. I had a wonderful official life throughout, though I had to play tough most of the time to live up to the expectations of the title as “Saidapet Raja”. I had the privilege of being on the team of engineers in the construction of “The National Defence Academy”, construction of the first new cantonment at Babina after Independence, whilst in Kashmir providing support services at places like Kargil, Dras, Leh ,etc., during the 1964 war. I was also involved in the construction of a Submarine Base. Personally I end by saying that in life I had a host of helpful good friends and in particular Mr. C. Sanjeevi and Capt. Kuppu Rao Nowlay. God endowed me with an understanding wife and lovely children in Gopinath and Geeta who are settled in life. I have 2 grandsons and 3 granddaughters. One of the granddaughters is married and settled in the United States of America and the other granddaughter was married recently and has made London her home. I am now 78. I wish all the friends and families of the 1945 batch the best of luck, prosperity and a healthy life. 113

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8 Tributes to my Parents

My Father Dad passed away in the early hours of 22 July 2007 in Chennai, after a prolonged illness. I was hoping I’d have more time to get acquainted with the idea of death and what it means for those of us left behind. We were busy chasing doctors and coming home each day only to hurriedly attend to our daily chores and rush back to the hospital. His heart withstood three bypass surgeries at the Anderson Memorial Hospital, Houston, done by Dr. Denton Cooley and Dr. Mathur and arranged by Beena’s uncle Dr. Potu Rao. Given 5 years of remission, his heart lasted over 20 years and did not fail him in the end, it was pulmonary infection combined with the failure of his kidneys that ended his life. He lived life larger than life itself and enjoyed each day.

I know the pain of losing my father will perhaps never leave me. It has been 13 years and I imagined it will ease with time, but I suspect I will never get over it. How can I?

The whole family was forced to confront death’s discourteous blow. While I wish one never has to experience such a life-altering loss, the truth is, we all will. Death is a part of life. And once it strikes someone you so dearly love, your existence will never be the same. I know the pain of losing my father will perhaps never leave me. It has been 13 years and I imagined it will ease with time, but I suspect I will never get over it. How can I? His life, his influence and his energy are inextricably linked to mine, and I now take comfort in that. He raised me so that I can stand on mountains; he raised me so that I can be independent, believe in myself, pass through the storms of life and not be shaken by whatever comes my way. He always said he would support my decisions, but encouraged me to make them mine. He was always a pillar supporting me morally and financially. Since the time of my father’s death, I have had to face the indescribable grief of losing a son. They will forever be in my heart until the day it stops beating. And I am grateful that I am becoming a more fully realized human being, a more caring, compassionate and empathetic person because of Dad and Venkat. Still, I would forfeit any wisdom for the sake of having them back. 114

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What is the measure of a man? Is it the amount of money he has or the possessions he owns, and the power he holds? Is it the professional success he has achieved over the years? I don’t believe it is any of these things. The true measure of a man is how much love he gives; how selflessly he shares whatever he can to help others; how consistently he lifts up those around him with a kind word, a funny joke, a compliment, a listening ear, or the very shoes off his feet. By this measure, my father was immeasurable. I do my best to remain grateful and comforted, knowing how much my beloved father positively affected the lives of others. The Farewell Address given by his division on his transfer from Babina is a measure of his professional and personal attributes. He helped people get jobs, addressed their personal problems and, although he appeared externally tough, in him resided a heart of gold. He played fairly and ethically whether professional or personal. He helped his sister get married (my mother played a big role by giving her jewellery) and supported his brother-in-law in guidance of their family. His brother was guided into a professional path and marriage. His nephew who was on a rather shaky foundation was stabilised, married and supported to manage his family. Countless are the ways in which he supported his immediate family—my sister, me and our children. On one occasion I approached him for help to educate my son 115

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Venkat abroad. In a very soft, compassionate voice, he said, “Did I educate all the other grandchildren abroad? So, what is so special about your son?” In the year 2011 Venkat did go abroad for his education, supported by me and with my father’s blessings.

Dad loved to dance to music and loved to make people laugh. All he ever wanted to do was make other people feel comfortable and make sure they were not feeling left out. He was an embodiment of love

I lost both my father and my son, but only in body, not in spirit. This is by far the most painful and heart-ripping and life-altering experience the family has endured. Dad had no attachment to money or properties, but believed in its preservation. As an Executor of his father’s will, he ensured it was carried out to the letter, with no whimpers and grumbles. He struggled to save my mother’s properties and to sell them at the right time. For 11 years he fought the system against Urban Land Ceiling and a Gazetted notification on government acquisition of his land in Tambaram. He was resolute and relentless in attaining his objectives in life. My qualifications are a testament to his willingness to spend monies in support of education—The Lawrence School, Lovedale, College of Engineering, Guindy, and thereafter University of California, Berkeley, USA. Dad was the most spontaneously generous person I have ever known. I literally could walk away with his shirts, ties and safari suits. My son would peep into Dad’s room to tell his grandfather how nice his perfume smelt, and the prompt response was “It’s yours”. My son shared a rare bond with his grandfather, and because he was sworn to secrecy, he never revealed what advice his grandfather gave him, sometimes over a drink or two. I was grateful to God that my son had the opportunity to have some of Dad’s wisdom rub off on him. Dad loved to dance to music and loved to make people laugh. All he ever wanted to do was make other people feel comfortable and make sure they were not feeling left out. He was an embodiment of love. “A heart of gold” is how every family member and friend has described Dad, and it’s incredible to see just how boundless his reach has been. He made an impact on every person he met, at school, college, service, retirement, alumni, clubs and even strangers (who usually became friends). The love Dad spread on this Earth continues to grow and will live on, and that is the ultimate measure of any human being. All the morals and values he taught me have moulded me and still guide me. I am the strong man that I am today all because of my father and God by my side. Dad, I couldn’t ask for a better father. You were real and genuine. The finest, most charming gentleman I ever knew, who dressed immaculately for every occasion, be it a wedding or a Thirupathi temple visit—the best father a son could ask for. I assure you I am a better person each day and I will always make you proud. We love you, Dad, now and forevermore. 116

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My Mother The world was blessed with the gentlest soul on 28 September 1936 when my mother was born. My Mother is caring, loving, empathetic, compassionate, indeed everything anyone would want in a mother. She had an abundance of love and care to give, not only to us, but also to all those that have been fortunate enough to be raised by her, or that have been blessed to know her. I have seen the strength of a woman through my Mum’s life. Despite the young age at which she was married, with the help of my father, she educated herself in reading, writing and etiquette and performed her role admirably. She brought to life the saying that “behind every successful man there’s a strong woman”. I saw what that truly means with my parents. She graciously took on responsibility and respected him irrespective of his occasional intemperate ways. It behoves me to understand how well she brought us up, despite the handicap of youth and inexperience, with the help of Dad and Subadhramma Avva. It’s somewhat tragic that we seldom get to see our parents at their finest moments in the prime of their life. Actually, we do see them at those moments, but we’re often much too young to fully realize what we’re witnessing. It isn’t until we have become parents

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ourselves and can look back through the lens of experience that we see how amazing our parents were. In these moments, we need to find some way to express directly to our parents just how important they were in helping us become who we are. Mom and I share a lot in common other than the obvious DNA. She is loving, caring and all round gentle, and I like to think I am like her.

I think it’s always difficult as a child to express a lot of things to your mother, especially if it’s just thanking her for being who she is. “Thank you, Mom, for being there for me whenever I needed you. Thank you for never asking questions while I cried and instead just hugging me. Thanks for rubbing my back all the times I was sick or hospitalised. Thanks for always making me laugh. Thanks for staying up late just to make sure I got home, and for making coffee at odd hours whist I prepared for my exams. Thank you for supporting me in everything I did. Thanks for filling the early part of my life with warmth, love and comfort. Thank you for always being an example of strength, compassion, love, faith, honesty, sacrifice and a million other things. I’m thankful that you corrected me when I was wrong, pushing me to be a better version of myself and challenging me to try harder to be an upstanding citizen and a man of strength. I know I never said all these things, but I am thankful for all of them.” Mom is like a mother to some of my cousins as well. She sacrificed for them just as much as she sacrificed for her own children. To me, she’s first a mother, and then a best friend. If you are a parent you will understand the dynamic of this relationship. When Mom encounters people that are in pain, forgotten, or desperate for human interaction, she is kind. This doesn’t even describe the acts of kindness she’s done throughout her life and career, including to all her acquired relatives through marriage. We have had many Mother’s Days and birthday celebrations, and we thought hard about the gifts that we should give to her. We have bought flowers, but those wilt and dry up; we have bought her clothes and jewellery, but she gives them away to someone who she thinks will enjoy them. The truth is that I could write an entire book about her. She is the true definition of a mother and I am so blessed to have her in my life. Raising me wasn’t easy. Nothing that she did for me went unnoticed. I felt her pain to see the tears roll down her face every time I left home for boarding school after a holiday at home, and felt her joy on my arrival. I love how she attempts to hide from the camera. I love how she always answer my calls, no matter what time of day it is. I love how her intuition is always right. I love when she says “call when you get there” —it shows how much she cares. I am sorry for all the times we fought; I know now it was just wasted moments. I am sorry for all the times I pushed her away; I know now that she was trying to help. I’m sorry for all the times I didn’t have enough time to talk 118

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to her; I realise now that she has always made time for me. I want her to know that she is the most important person in my life. I want to make her proud of what I am today; it is because of both my parents. I know these are things that parents are supposed to do for their children, but I don’t think anyone could have done it better. I now truly understand what went into those huge breakfasts, lunches and dinners my mother would make—a ton of work, cooking and cleaning—and done with grace. I remember times when I would ask for a little money to go to a movie, or a party, or whatever, and she would gladly give it. Again, it never occurred to me in that moment that she may have been giving up something she wanted so I could have something I wanted. Really, what it all boils down to is that my Mother is the most magnificent Mom I could have asked for. Beautiful, smart, devoted, caring and everything else any son could want, all wrapped up in a smile. “Mom, you are seldom far from my thoughts and never out of my heart. I am putting these words on paper so that you can always have them close at hand. I want you to always know that I love you and cherish you. This is how I will celebrate you, by telling the world why I love and appreciate you so much. Thank you for loving me, thank you for being you, thank you, Mom.”

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SECTION 2

THE AUTHOR’S JOURNEY

9. My Early Days and Schooling

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10. College Years and Further Education

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11. My Career – Life as a Civil Engineer

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9 My Early Days and Schooling

do not recall my early days in Kindergarten and Upper Kindergarten, except that Subadhramma Avva would drop me and pick me up from the Convent school in Poona. I understand from my mother I was rather mischievous and up to no good. My sister and I were found one day, at the age of 5 and 3, with a stack of smoked cigarettes and butts, and but for the timely intervention of an elder, about to light them up. On another occasion, both of us put kerosene on a shoe rack and lit it. I would do the disappearing act by hiding on the terrace of the house.

Considering my parents’ educational past, or because of it, they placed a lot of emphasis on the need to send their children to good schools

The early years (Gopi, 4th from left second row) Mount Carmel High School, Poona 1954

By contact with friends in the Army, my father got to know of The Lawrence School, Lovedale. Considering my parents’ educational past, or because of it, they placed a lot of emphasis on the need to send their children to good schools. My sister and I got admission, but my sister opted out after a year.

History of The Lawrence School, Lovedale, the Nilgiris The history of the school, its founder, and its imposing monumental red brick structure is fascinating.

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The Lawrence School, Lovedale Reminiscence

The Lawrence School, Lovedale is an educational institution in Lovedale, located near Ootacamund, Tamil Nadu, India, and named after its founder, Sir Henry Montgomery Lawrence. He had mooted the idea about the establishment of a chain of schools to provide education to the children of the deceased and serving soldiers and officers of the British army. His dream took shape and four such schools, known as Lawrence Asylum, were established: at Sanawar in 1847, and at Mount Abu in 1856, both during his lifetime; then at Lovedale, Ootacamund in 1858 and at Ghora Gali, in present-day Pakistan in 1860. In 1913 the name of the school was changed from Lawrence Asylum to Maj. Gen. Sir Henry Lawrence Memorial School. On being accorded royal patronage in 1922, the name of the school was changed again in 1925 to the Lawrence Memorial Royal Military School. In 1949, soon after Indian Independence, the school was handed over to the civilian authorities of the Government of India; subsequently, the name was again changed to The Lawrence School, as it is known today. As the school is located in Lovedale, the school is also simply referred to as “Lovedale”. The school’s motto is “Never Give In”. … On May 31, 1988, a commemorative postage stamp was issued by India Post to commemorate 130 years of its existence. Wikipedia Amalgamation of the Madras Military Male Orphan Asylum with the Lawrence Asylum was considered from 1860. 220 boys from the MMMOA moved in September 1871. The girls from the Madras Female Orphan School, about 100, were transferred in October 1904. … A researcher advised in 2010 she had a copy of Never Give In: Old Lawrencians’ Directory 1988-89. Inside this book from pages 21-93 is a copy of Historical Register of Admissions from 1858 to 1954. In it (the Directory) is stated, “As the children were admitted into the school their names and date of admission were recorded chronologically in handwriting in a big Ledger which I understand is in the Archives located in the clock tower in the school. In 1988, these names were copied and typed into the above book. My brother visited the school in the 1990s and through his efforts I was able to obtain a copy of this Admission Directory. If one is not familiar with English surnames, it may be difficult to decipher the Palmer script. Consequently, there are many inaccuracies in these recorded names, but if one knows the time frame that the child was in school, and the first names it is possible to locate the name. For example, the surname Lillywhite has been copied as Lilly, White or Dillywhite, etc. the surname Quinn is written as Quinn, Luinn, Duinn etc.; the name Hampstead has been copied as Ham, PStead. … in total there are more than seven thousand names. The Families in British India Society (FIBIS)

Schools were established at Sanawar in 1847, Muree in 1860 and Mount Abu in 1856

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I have this Directory and am in full praise of my schoolmate and fellow freemason, C.P. Mammen of the Class of 1966 (Aravalli House) for his effort to research and print this document for the Old Lawrencians.

The School’s official website describes the history more elaborately. The Lawrence Asylum was built as a memorial to Major General Sir Henry Lawrence, CB, BT, LT.COL., ADC to Queen Victoria, K.CB, who early in 1856 offered a sum of Rs. 5,000 down and Rs.1,000 per annum if action were taken to found, at some Madras hill-station, an Asylum similar to those already established at Sanawar and Mount Abu. In February of 1856, a meeting was held in Ootacamund to make every effort to carry out the project. From the beginning, difficulty arose as to the religious principles to be inculcated at the institution. However, a prospectus for ‘The Ootacamund Asylum for the Orphans and other children of European soldiers in India’, on a strictly Protestant basis, was issued. A committee was formed with Bishop Dealtry as its President. The committee then sought the aid of the Government, but the latter said that their action would depend on the support received from the Army. It must be noted that the Commander-in-chief objected to the restriction of the institution to Protestants. The Government also stated that the institution must adopt the rules of the Sanawar Asylum from which the committee proposed to deviate. In his will, Sir Henry Lawrence had commended the scheme (founding of an Asylum at a hill station under the Madras Presidency) to the care of the East India Company. This led to the project being revived in 1858. At a meeting held in Ootacamund, in August of the same year, it was resolved to found the institution by adopting the Mount Abu rules. A new committee was formed of which Bishop Dealtry was again the Patron. Early in 1859, the ‘Stone House’ was purchased at the cost of Rs.22,600 for the institution. Thus was born what we now know as The Lawrence School, Lovedale. … After the takeover by the Government of Independent India, it was run as a public school, open to all, with a 40 percent reservation of seats and a 20 percent fee subsidy, for children of Defence Personnel. …

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Glimpses of A Glorious Past: An Informal History of The Lawrence School, Lovedale has found a home in the website of the Old Lawrencians Association (OLA). It was formally released on May 22, 2017 at the AGM of the OLA by its President, Rukhmini Reddy Krishnan, (Class of ’61). The School, founded in 1858, is now over 150 years old. We therefore decided to break the informal history into three parts of fifty years each. …Book 1, which covered the first fifty years from 1858 to 1908 was uploaded to the website of The Old Lawrencians Association, Lovedale on June 10, 2017. … Book 2 came later, which covered the next fifty years from 1908 to 1958. This was uploaded on July 26, 2017. The period covered in Book 2 saw the zenith of the old British Raj and later the coming of Independence for a new, democratic India. … Book 3 of “Glimpses…” … covers the third fifty years from 1959 to 2009. By then the School already had a reputation for being one of the finest public schools in India. I use the term “public school” in the way it is used in the UK as distinct from the public school in the United States. Here’s hoping Old Lawrencians all over the world across many generations would enjoy dipping into this work from time to time to savour the sense of the past. Many have contributed by sharing their reminiscences and giving their inputs Prem Rao, Class of 1967, Lawrence School, Lovedale, Nilgiri House

Memoirs of an English Teacher until retirement at Lovedale “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness.” - Oscar Wilde The best way to express your ideas and thoughts of School, the Headmaster and its staff is through the words of our English Language Teacher at School, Easaw Joseph John “Yanni” in his ‘Memoirs of Easaw Joseph John - Chapter 6’, extracts of which are reproduced here. They make good reading.

E.J. John (left) and platform to thousands of footfalls over years—Lovedale station

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Reminiscence A Trip Down Memory Lane “Acres and acres of gently rolling hills dotted with tall firs and eucalyptuses meet your eyes in all directions when you enter the sprawling Lawrence School campus at Lovedale. The place is barely three or four miles from Ooty along the Dodabetta hill road that snakes past large expanses of landscaped tea gardens followed by the thickly wooded verge on your left broken here and there by noisy brooks and on your right, past raised banks that blend with the lay of the land. You pass the railway station and then wind your way up the road that runs through the campus until you come to a fork where the school flagstaff is, at which point you take a sharp The sprawling school campus through tall firs and eucalyptus right. As you enter Lovedale, its faintly rustic charm is interrupted only by the largely red-brick structures that make up the school and its appurtenances scattered over a large area. Marking the northern (?) boundary of the campus is the Big Hill and until about the middle of the nineteen hundred’s it was not uncommon for wild beasts to stray into it from the thickets nearby. Wild boars would make their forays into the potato fields on the southern slopes of the school even as late as the late Sixties, as I recall. In 1962 (1959?) the school had to call in rangers to scare away two tigers that had descended on the campus uninvited. Their presence was too close for comfort. In the event, the marksmen played it safe and shot and killed the big cats. I have on my hard disk a rare photograph of a brace of felled felines flanked by a dozen or so of faintly smug-looking humans, mostly the female of the species, two of whom are seen posing nonchalantly holding in their well-groomed hands, of all things, deadly firearms—a doublebarrel and a long-range single bore, no less! I was three years too late to have featured in that picture, if I was that way inclined (I did personally see the two tigers that were shot, I believe in 1959). In the August The felled felines, 1959 of 1965, I joined the school as a teacher and left it a little over six years later. Except for a flying visit or two that lasted no more than a few hours each time to see our children, a little over thirty years were to pass after leaving school before we stepped into the campus for an extended visit. Ever since we returned to Kumbanad in 1994, Ammu and I have been planning a trip to Lawrence School, Lovedale, as a gesture of appreciation for what the school had offered us while we were there. We had left the campus twentythree years before that, after having spent the most memorable years of our life there. We were then in the prime of our lives. To me, as a teacher, they were the most rewarding, if rather cloistered, period of my professional life. When we received the invitation to the 143rd Founder’s Celebrations, in the first week of May 2001, it brought back to me a rush of memories. It called to mind images of the easy informality with which the teachers rubbed 129

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shoulders with their wards and of the camaraderie among the teaching fraternity, than whom one could hardly have found a more committed lot anywhere. If there were any who fell by the wayside, they did not stay down for too long. For, they usually picked themselves up by their bootstraps and fell in once again however stressful the task might have been. How can one forget the frenetic preparations for the Founder’s Celebrations every year and, through it all, the reassuring presence of K.I. Thomas, the headmaster, he of the measured stride and studied detachment, alas no longer with us! Nothing ever fazed him.

Left: The Headmaster (KIT) with Prime Minister Nehru and Indira Gandhi Right: The Headmaster with the Chief Guest, Admiral Kataria

A word in passing about Kovoor Iype Thomas will not be out of place here. Everyone called him KIT. (To us he was Princi.) No one could overawe him. Anyone who tried to would be gently rapped over the knuckles as many a mandarin from the misty heights of officialdom had learned to his discomfiture. There was the time when a prince from somewhere in the North East—Manipur I believe it was—was enrolled in the school. His father the Raja, trying to pull rank, had insisted that the boy’s valet would keep him company at the school during term time. If allowed, that would fly in the face of the school tradition of treating everyone equally. KIT’s response was, “I’m the Raja of Lovedale and my writ runs here.” The boy was promptly withdrawn. (The boy’s name if I recall right was Okun) There are parents and parents. It takes all kinds to make up that lot. There are those who implicitly trust the school in the matter of their pastoral responsibilities. They are easy to relate to and are good friends of the school. Their children generally do well at school. Then there are those who think that every teacher has a price and can be bought so that their children would get preferential treatment at school. They cannot believe that there are those who will not succumb to such blandishments. As a rule, their children are pampered and spoiled at home. Then there are those who, by virtue of their exalted station in life, think that the school can be pushed around. They are the ones who need to be told where to get off or be taken down a peg or two. And when that happens, their children promptly take their cue and toe the line. KIT knew exactly how to deal with each one. Different strokes for different folks! No one was ever put down harshly. In spite of his position and experience, he never laid down the law arbitrarily. He was always willing to listen to other people’s views and defer to them if he was convinced of it, for he knew that long-held opinions were not necessarily self-evident truths. For that reason, I remember his telling me once never to offer gratuitous advice. 130

In dealing with errors of omission or commission on the part of his colleagues, he was not an unreasonable man. He would wait patiently for a convincing explanation and if none were forthcoming, he would tactfully admonish first. If the person did not measure up, he would not mince words anymore. As for dealing with his wards, in some ways he was ahead of his time. When many a headmaster would wink at the system of corporal punishment, he detested the very idea of it for he believed that it was a way of taking the line of least resistance. Rarely, if ever, does corporal punishment deter the others from wrongdoing or, for that matter, rehabilitate the wrongdoer, he would say. He believed that, often, punishment was meted out for an assumed affront to the teacher’s dignity rather than for the purpose of reforming the offender. On the rare occasions he felt the symbolic need for using the birch, he would reluctantly invite Subedar-Major P.G. Menon, the military instructor, to ‘administer justice gently’ and that in his presence and in the privacy of his office. On one occasion, however, when some of the school prefects were found guilty of serious dereliction of duty, he had to wield the rod himself on the guilty, much to his distaste. I say ‘had to’ because the faculty to a man had been insistent that the prefects were made an example of. It was done in the Morning Assembly in the presence of the whole school. With every swing of his arm, he must have felt himself to be losing all dignity in the eyes of the school; for he threw away the cane, disgusted with himself for having gone through with it, and announced his resignation almost at the same instant. His face said it all. I can never forget his parting shot as he strode out of the Large Hall: ‘What you need is a sergeant major, not a headmaster’. It took all the powers of persuasion of the shamefaced teachers to make him change his mind! And the boys and girls felt sufficiently chastened to be on their best behaviour for a long time afterwards. Those who were there at that time would remember how ‘a thunderstorm’ helped ‘to clear the air’. There are other enduring impressions, too. How can one forget the images of the grey skies and the cheerless drizzle in the bitter chill of winter and, of its counterpoise, the flower-beds filled with many-hued flowers that joyfully burst forth in the crisp summer sun, like frescoes that set each other off! And, the well-manicured lawns, the ornamental palms, the topiary, the sculptures, the Mahatma in bas-relief at the school porch and as you approach it, to the right of it, the sculpted bust of Sir Henry Lawrence, the Founder of the School, are all part of that broad canvas. Then there is that lone sentinel, the imposing tower whose gaze fell in all four directions on tall eucalyptuses and larches and firs. The top of the tower cradled a clock that struck on the hour every hour. And every quarter hour too was struck, as I recall.

Above: The Founder (sculpted by

To those congenital laggards who were PE Thomas) given to dragging themselves much Below: The laggards watching the clock against their will to the playing fields all the while praying for the mandatory hour to end, watching the clock was a favourite pastime. Most of the boys, though, loved their games if only as a respite from the stifling classrooms and the dorms. And many of them went on to make their mark in one game or the other and win school colours. Just under the clock-tower, as you come out of the main school building, you would see in summer the Jacaranda trees in glorious lilac bloom. The jacaranda brings to mind the daily ritual of the Senior School bearers Dorairaj and Joe, in their white uniforms complete with red waist bands and red and white turbans,

Reminiscence

(l to r): Maroon cardigans with grey skirts; Khakhi shorts with Battle Jackets; and reminiscing on the banks, Class of 1967 visit in 1992

dispensing tea during recess, to the teachers and the taught as they pleasantly jostled even as they held out their mugs to be filled with tea or more often with what was an apology for tea. The spacious lawns around the tea ring gave them enough elbowroom to stand around in small clusters sipping tea and ribbing each other, giving as good as they got and all taken in good part. The same could be said of the rough and tumble of the Kabadi games played on the lawns that sometimes the teachers too were dragged into for the sheer heck of it. At times such as those, the joie de vivre on the campus was unmistakable. And, between lessons, the turrets and towers and passages of the school resounded to the boisterous laughter of the battle-jacketed boys in khaki and the excited chatter of the cheerful girls in their maroon cardigans and grey skirts. Now and again, the lawns would be a stage for the antics of the larger-than-life, celluloid hero on the Tamil screen of the sixties, M.G. Ramachandran, MGR for short, clad in black and on horseback like a swashbuckling Zorro, driving the villains into a tight corner and carrying all before him until he is reunited with his damsel in distress, mostly in the person of Jayalalitha the celluloid heroine of the time. The Lawrence School, with its imposing, red-brick façade of turrets and towers not to speak of its extensive grounds, lent itself admirably for filming period pieces that called for a large cast of artistes and extras. Raj Kapoor, the doyen of the Bombay film fraternity, once visited Lovedale to do a recce for a film of his. It was a Sunday and he could not meet the headmaster. I remember, I ran into him at the school porch as he was leaving. He promised to come back the next day. I do not remember if he did. As for teachers, there were many interesting characters, each with some quirk or the other that gave their inventive wards a chance to coin nicknames for most of them. There was the familiar figure of Ms. Hensman (called ‘Ma Hennie’ behind her back), often seen wandering the campus greens with her little ‘rat on a leash’ in tow, (no offence meant either to the canine or to its mistress). Another fixture in the Lovedale landscape was the suave McMahon—everyone called him Mac—the inevitable cigarette between his fingers, striding down the lawns, with his academic Ma Hennie (l) and Mac gown billowing behind him like Mandrake’s cape in the all-too-familiar eponymous cartoon. Apart from being excellent teachers of English and platonic friends, Ma Hennie and Mac were also thespians who promoted Drama in the school. Mac in particular had the uncanny knack of spotting histrionic talent in the most unpromising of boys and girls and licking them into shape for the School Play staged every year on Founder’s Day. 132

Who will ever forget a ‘four-eyes’ like the chain-smoking Harnam Singh Sisodia, with his risqué jokes, his thick glasses and his waxed moustache turned up at the ends like the Rajput that he was! He was known for his drollery when he was in his cups especially in the company of his like-minded friends, as he could shed all his inhibitions away from the prying eyes of the compulsively priggish. On the Eve of Christmas, 1966, just before midnight, there was a knock on our door followed by what sounded like a mule braying in agony. On opening the door, lo and behold, whom do I see but Sisodia, with his wife Sheila in tow, parodying the popular carol and singing, “Joy to the World, Harnam has come!” He was in his overcoat and Balaclava that covered his head, ears and neck but not his moustachioed face and, true to type, he was waving a bottle of Hercules rum. They came in and we men had ‘fellowship’ together, but the ribaldry that went with it would not bear repetition here. Fortunately the ladies were not within earshot. Not surprisingly, on his desk at the Audio-visual Department, of which he was then in charge, was a wooden frame surrounding the legend, “Be brief, be blunt, begone!” When he later left for the United States his colleagues were sorry to see such a colourful character go. He passed away in 2000 and his wife in 2004. (I had the wonderful opportunity of meeting both Mr. and Mrs. Sisodia in the fall of 1974 in New Jersey, USA, and enjoying their hospitality). Incidentally, their son Sangram is Professor of Neurosciences at the University of Chicago.

The 1966 Cricket team with Captain Ajay Vir, the HM and Vaithy and (right) Woody, the then HM and Field Marshal Manekshaw at a Founder’s Day Parade

And then there was the cricket-crazy Vaidyanathan (everyone called him Vaithy) whose unaffected charm shone through despite his bespectacled face and his sartorial indifference. (He was also known as Thirutra Rascal Vaidyanathan by the students and there was a song in Tamil that was rephrased to name him—Thirutra Rascal Vaidyanathan Va Va Va!—and his administration of the game of cricket in school) I remember him fondly for his convincing performance as

(l to r) Mrs & Mr Hari in front of Vindhya House; The family visiting the Haris’ in Australia,1994; and Mrs & Mr Harnam Singh Sisodia

Reminiscence a banker in ‘The Dice’, one of the staff plays that I had produced. Then again we had the successive Senior Masters— the lanky Vyas also known as Woodie and the diminutive Hariharan—as to which of the two was the wilier was a constant conundrum for the rest of their colleagues. Nevertheless, as a sport loving, beef-eating Brahmin (whose unorthodox ways may have made him stick out like a sore thumb among the ‘thoroughbreds’), Hariharan was very well regarded by his more cosmopolitan colleagues. The former reminded me somewhat of the self-confessed ’umble Uriah Heap in ‘David Copperfield’. (The family got to visit the Hariharans at their home near Castle Hill, Sydney, Australia, in 1994 and enjoy their hospitality. “Hari” drove us to the Blue Mountains and the Three Sisters). Wasn’t it John Kenneth Galbraith who said that humility was a highly over-rated virtue? Vyas might well have felt secure in the company of our bureaucrats to many of whom subservience, coupled with pettifogging, is breadand-butter. Am I being unfair? Maybe I am, maybe not. To be fair to him, let me hasten to add that he was held in high regard as an educationist in the Public School Circuit throughout the country. Sadly, he too has passed on. Nil nisi bonum. (Vyas was a hard taskmaster and I remember his left hand going up suddenly to strike my right cheek for some wrong doing in class. He used the same stroke in cricket with great ease and excellence as a left hander. On another occasion in Class X, Shiv Sharma and I were asked to go out of the class by “Lennie” (Leonard our Maths teacher) for making a racket. We enjoyed yakking in the corridor till “Woodie” crept up on us and made us wait in the sun diagonally opposite (the Vindhya House Square) the Senior Master’s office so that we could be seen from his office.) The faculty drew people from all parts of India. Although they were of different beliefs and cultures, they got along as one family, by and large. A congenial meeting point for them was the Staff Club. I remember going there whenever I could find time for a bout of billiards with the likes of the weaving master, Dhanagopal and the sculpture master, P. E. Thomas (I took his subject and enjoyed learning how to sculpt in clay and make them The Staff Club for the faculty into Cement Sculptures using Plaster of Paris, and the art of painting on leather). I also enjoyed playing tennis with my colleagues, Mukherjee and Pet (an acronym for P. E. Thomas) and Vaidhyanathan and, last but not the least, the military instructor of the school, P.G. Menon. He was an ex-army man whose cocktail cabinet was always fully stocked. At a pinch, one could always touch him for a bottle or two. If his waistline, which was as generous as his nature, weighed him down somewhat in his exertions on the court, he never showed it except when his knee, I forget which one, played him up. Apart from tennis for the male of the species, the occasional Whist Drive that Engineer D’Cruz organized was very popular with the faculty and their wives. Although self-sufficient in many ways, Lovedale was by its very location cut off from the mainstream society. So, the community continually met and interacted socially and in large measure eased this sense of isolation by some activity or the other. For instance, we often made up a foursome during weekends for a game of Bridge. Pothri Nath Raina, the Kashmiri Pandit (popularly known as Pindruji amongst the students) who taught Sanskrit at Lovedale, was my Bridge guru. It took a long time before I could hold my own with the more seasoned players on the campus.

Nargis Gupta fondly called Ma Gupu

To me, as a rookie card player, these games hosted by Ganesh Gupta (known as Gutrugu—taught us Hindi and took PT activities) had provided for me a civilized way of mixing the tiresome certainty of losing a Rubber—thus inviting a glare from my 134

Reminiscence partner of the day—with the wry compulsions of having to taste the ‘savouries’ that Nargis Gupta (Ma Gupu taught us Geography and I personally enjoyed her teaching and her rather sophisticated looks), the lady of the house, offered out of the goodness of her heart. She may not have been the greatest cook in the world, but I fondly remember her and, in no less measure, her husband Ganesh as friendly neighbours who went out of their way to help others. Again, Nargis would strike anyone who met her as being quite a striking personality. She was indulgent to a fault. Rather uncharitably, her wards at the girls’ school called her ‘Ma Goat’, although what goatish connection they might have made escapes me. In her own way, she was quite dignified. It was of her culinary skills, such as they were, that Thankam, KIT’s wife, once archly said, “I pity Ganesh. We taste Nargis’ offerings only once in a while, thank God, but the poor fellow has to eat it every day!” Thankam, incidentally, was an excellent cook and a gracious hostess. Needless to say, the headmaster and his wife customarily played host to his colleagues, having them over at his residence in small groups at a time. The Malayalees (the people of Kerala who spoke Malayalam) in the faculty were a clannish lot who formed a group within a group. We often met socially. The irascible K. C. Jacob was the doyen of our clan. (K.C. Jacob taught us Physics and probably the only teacher that got away without a nickname.) A Brown University alumnus, he proved himself to be a brilliant teacher. He also had a faintly puritanical streak in him. He could be witty, but his one-liners were always delivered deadpan. On the rare occasions that he laughed, he was careful that he was with close friends who would not let on that he could be amusing or K C Jacob next to his look alike (Sculpted by P.E. Thomas) warm-hearted. Upright to a fault, he would not brook anyone who strayed from the straight and the narrow. In spite of his bursts of ire at erring students, he was a kindly person whose bark was worse than his bite. Sadly, Jacob has passed on. I remember him best for his avuncular strictures to his colleagues, delivered with a wry smile. He left Lovedale, miffed by a professional disagreement he had had with the Headmaster. He had felt let down by him, one of his own kind, a Malayalee no less. Rumour had it that the so-called disagreement was engineered by the Senior Master who could not see eye to eye with Jacob on matters professional. Kunjanchenkutty—that was his pet name—and his family were very close to us while we were together at Lovedale. In fact, when the headship at the Cochin Refinery School was offered to him, it was at my insistence that he accepted it. Better by far to be your own master than brood in mortification. (I visited K.C. Jacob in 1971-‘72 in Cochin when he was heading the Cochin Refinery School. He was one of the most well respected teachers of our times and one of my favourites. May his soul RIP.) Then there was the self-effacing K.N. Nambiar (popularly known as ‘Nambi”. I took to learning drawings cartoons as an afternoon activity) whose prodigious aesthetic sensibilities had been kept well under wraps until he left school to reveal himself as an artist of great talent. His paintings and sketches have since seen the light of day in many an art exhibition. With an expert cook for a wife, a strict vegetarian who could amazingly rustle up delicious meat dishes, it was but natural that he often played host to his omnivorous friends. Another friend, K. Krishnan (Kaka) left his mark on the school as a successful teacher of Malayalam and housemaster, but I remember him most of all as the organizer of the Onam (Malayali harvest festival) festivities at the school. He is no more. V. Mohanraj, the librarian and P.E. Thomas, the sculpture master, who also belonged to the Malayali clan, were as thick as thieves. They were permanent fixtures at Onam festivities. P. E. Thomas was a product of Shantiniketan Art School. His sculptures stand tall on the Lawrence campus, still. Mohanraj’s love of books was infectious and no boy or girl could have passed through the portals of Lawrence without being bitten by that bug. He has written several books on library science. 135

Reminiscence Presently, he is in Seattle busy writing more books. All my Malayali colleagues had been good hosts and frequently entertained their friends. We had a Parsee too on the staff in the person of Major Mehta. The bursar of the school, the dapper Major Mehta, with his elegant beret that was never out of place, come rain or sunshine, and never gave away the secret beneath it, unobtrusively held sway as second in command to the headmaster. Soft-spoken and gentle, I do not recall his ever having raised his voice even under the most trying circumstances. He was always nattily dressed. He nearly always sported a navy-blue blazer and grey flannel trousers. He indulged in moderation and liked his whisky. I remember when his second son managed to secure a distinction in both English Major Mehta, the school busar Language and Literature in the ‘O’ level exams, he gifted his son’s teacher a bottle of Black Label, which was a precious commodity and hard to come by in those days. I enjoyed it in small measures for a long time afterwards. (What a silent and graceful couple they made. The Bursar got away without a nickname, a mark of his uprightness and soft ways. His children Nauzer (senior) and Pinko (Junior) were in school with us. I had the opportunity of flying with Capt. Nauzer in ‘78-‘79 from Salalah to Muscat. The stewardess announced that Capt. Mehta was in charge, before take-off. I politely sent a note saying, if you are from Lovedale say “Yes”. The Stewardess came back promptly saying that the Captain would be honoured with my presence in the cockpit after we had reached cruising altitude. It was my first time in a cockpit during a flight. Thanks for the experience, Nauzer.) There were, too, the support staff each with a vital role to play. One such was Engineer D’Cruz, nearly always turned out in a double-breasted suit. I can still picture him on the Middle Flat banks, standing aloof silhouetted against the sky, with his nose in the air and his cigarette, always in a holder between his fingers, raised in slow motion to his lips and back. He was the ‘nuts-and-bolts’ man who made sure the school infrastructure did not break down. And also to the staff in the administrative section, the school was forever beholden. And to Joe and Susairaj and Dorairaj and Kuppuswami, to name but a few, of the subordinate staff, as they were rather patronizingly labelled, each with his own role to play, the school owed much. (We had names like Breadballs, Hitler, Keds, for the waiters) The drive up the winding hill road with its fourteen hairpin bends was not as daunting as the gauntlet that I had just run. In fact, compared to what we left behind us, to mix metaphors merrily, it was a cakewalk! The sheer scenic splendour of the luxuriant woods covering the steep hillsides that ran along ravines and of the wild streams cascading down the granite escarpments was soothing one’s frayed nerves. I cast my mind back to the Sixties and the early Seventies when we used to do the Mettupalayam to Lovedale leg of our journey to school after the holidays by the quaint old Nilagiri Mettupalayam ‘toy train’ chugging along the mountain track at a stately pace, its pinion engaging a toothed rack rail in the middle of the track to claw its way up lest it slipped. After Kallar, the first stop, the track ascends into the mountains hugging the verdant slopes. The train journey is three hours long, but the breath-taking beauty of the mountains, seen through the blue haze of a shimmering morning, more than makes up for the slow passage of time. The car ride took us only an hour and a bit to reach Ooty, despite the twists and the turns and the scenic ‘distractions’.” Easaw Joseph John (Yanni)

136

My Early Days and Schooling

What better way to get the insiders view of the staff than from the staff themselves. I am indeed grateful to Yanni for permission to reproduce extracts from his book. He is 91 and settled down in Kerala, and has wonderful children taking care of him at this advanced age. I have also taken the freedom to express myself in italics in his narrative.

The first weeks were always difficult, leaving parents was tough considering my age was only six and a half

On joining the faculty of Lawrence School, Yanni set the standards of the dress code for teachers. He was suave and dapper in his suits, tweed coats and checked trousers, not to forget his collection of caps. It automatically stemmed that the staff improved their spoken English. Classmates recall his sunshine (outdoor) classes, discussing George Bernard Shaw on the plush ‘tea’ lawns of the main building.

Prep School There was never a dull moment in school. In 1958 my father left me at the stairs of Prep School of The Lawrence School, Lovedale. I recall a youngster, Muthu, who grabbed my hands and took me into the Prep School building. When I returned to the same spot ten minutes later, Dad was gone. The first weeks were always difficult, leaving parents was tough considering my age was only six and a half. There’s not much I can remember of my Prep School days or the teachers, but I do remember Ms. Gokuldas was my Telugu teacher. I joined the school in Class ll. The Prep School

The Prep School—the very steps my father left me in 1958

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Reminiscence

Left: Prep School dining hall Right: The dormitory Below: The numbered clothing pigeon holes

was from Class 1 to Class IV. I was in Prep School from 1958 to 1960 (i.e., Class ll to Class lV). All this has changed now. I remember taking Horse Riding. Gopal, a member of the Travancore royalty, got kicked by a horse and ended up in Calicut, and never did return to school. I can recall a consolation prize I received in the Class ll—a hardcover book with Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck stories. We were well taken care of. Each boys’ dormitory had a caretaker who would assist in making the beds in the early days. Occasional wetting of beds by guys was common. Another name that comes to mind is Ma Barbara Prince (OL), a very attractive teacher. We used to collect our weekly change of clothes, linen and towel from our pigeon holes. There was a tailor, Hala, mending all the school clothing. Despite the cold, we wore shorts with a shirt and tie and a battle jacket, all of khaki. Our home luggage was kept under our beds and the school specified the list of home clothing to be brought. Our pigeon holes had numbers and the clothes were marked with these numbers. We were taken to Ooty Lake and other places of interest once a month. 138

My Early Days and Schooling

In my younger days, it was a lovely feeling to look forward to going home. We would make a wooden propeller to stick out of the compartments of the train and have fun watching it make the revolutions and have your hand vibrate, with a mixed feeling of fear and delight. These propellers were painted with paint stolen from the art department. The train parade was an activity we looked forward to at the end of each term, when boys and girls were grouped based on their end destinations like Delhi, Calcutta, Bombay, Kerala, etc. The Kerala line was serpentine. A train journey in the days of the coal and steam engines was a messy affair, but we would all dive for the window seat to look out and enjoy the breeze. Air-conditioned compartments were unheard of in the early years. At the end of the journey, we would look like characters from some Charles Dickens novel, blackened by soot and our clothes all a grimy mess. Homecoming began with a scrub.

Top: ‘The spirit of co-education’ sculpted by P.E.Thomas Below: The Uthup family with Jani and Ani, Ahmednagar 1959

Looking back, it is interesting to note how friends of similar age groups formed cliques. We would all have common goals, like looking for “tuck” when hungry and covering for each other. 1958-1960, my father was posted in Poona and Ahmednagar and I would join the Bombay party, getting down in Dhond. On the return, we would join the school party at Dhond. I travelled with Vinitha Jagmohan, and Jani and Ani Uthup (children of Maj. Uthup). Leaving home was always traumatic. My father would hold a straight face (although I knew he was hurting), my mother would openly burst into tears and take me into her arms. I recall crying profusely until I grew up to be in senior classes. The trauma would continue for an hour or so on the train, but once in the company of kids my age, home was left behind only to discuss what each one did during the holidays. 139

Reminiscence

Top: Kailash House, 1961 with Mr. K.C. Jacob, Mr. Purushotham and Mrs. Prince Below: (l-r) The Headmaster’s residence, Mr. K.I. Thomas and Mrs. Thankam Thomas and Salim and Mrs. Thomas

Junior School and Senior School In Prep School, we had all grown up together and, for the first time, in 1961 we found ourselves split into houses, which gave birth to the spirit of rivalry and competition. Junior School in my time was defined as being from Class V to Class VIII. I was in Kailash House in 1961 (Class V). The other house was Himalaya House. I recognised that there was some athletic prowess in me. Our team from Kailash House excelled in sports and we won most of the trophies in Athletics. Our Housemaster was

140

A birthday party

The Junior school

Reminiscence

Boating on the Ooty lake

Kailash House

The victorious Kailash House Athletic Team

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Siwalik House, 1963 with (l-r) Mr. K.C. Jacob, for whom I had a lot of regard. My neighbour in the dormitory was Mrs. Wilson, Banerjee, a new admission to the school, Manjit “Bunny” Gill. He and his sisters, Indra (1966) K.C. Jacob and Purushotham

and Aruna (1970), have become my lifelong friends. Class VI (1962) saw us split up again into South Block and North Block.

Vindhya House was my home for the next 4 years with Mr. Hariharan as my Housemaster. It was for the first time for a very very long time that Vindhya House was placed first in the Inter-House Athletics in 1964

I was in South Block (1962) and my Housemaster was Mr. Raina (Pindrooji). Some of the housemates I recall are “Kithroo” (J. Radhakrishnan) and “Carson” (N.P. Cariappa). Kithroo acted as Tarzan and Carson as his chimp in a House play. I recall Ms. Prince as a house teacher, a very soft-hearted and wonderful lady. I took Painting that year and had the honour of being taught by Anjolie Ela Menon. I only wish I had retained some of her works that were available for the taking at that time. In 1963 (Class Vll), I was a part of Siwalik House. The other houses were Himalaya and Kailash. I wanted to do Arts, but my father had registered me in the Science group (physics, chemistry and maths). Despite my plea, I was slotted into the Science group (and the rest is history). I continued to excel in Athletics and started taking part in English and Hindi debates. In 1964 (Class Vlll) we were attached to Houses in the Senior School (Vindhya —mauve, Aravalli—yellow, Sumeru—dark blue, and Nilgiri—red). We went up and down the ‘67ers’—a flight of 67 stone steps that connected the Junior and Senior Schools. Vindhya House was my home for the next four years with Mr. Hariharan 142

Reminiscence

1967 School Athletic team with E.R. Reddy

The athletes of Champak House, 1967

National Cadet Corp (NCC)Training

The Girl’s school

Gopi, Best Athlete 1967

Gopi breasting the tape

143 Roy Brown, Gopi, Tich Sharma, 1967

Reminiscence

as my Housemaster. It was for the first time for a very very long time that Vindhya House was placed first in the Inter-House Athletics in 1964. I contributed by winning the Junior Divison Best Athlete. This winning streak remained with Vindhya House till my final year in school—1967. I won the Inter-Division and the Senior Division Best Athlete in the respective years and got to represent the school in Inter-School Athletics. I was a participant in the 110m hurdles, 100m, 200m, 400m races and the relays. Participating in Inter-School Athletics was a great opportunity to mix with boys and girls from other schools. We would be ferried in our old school bus from Lovedale to the Wellington MRC Stadium, singing songs like “Yippee Ya”, “She’ll be coming down the mountain” and “My Bonnie lies over the ocean”, and shouting out as we passed the Needle Industries. I aspired to be the Athletic Captain in 1967, but my Physical Education Instructor, E.R. Reddy chose my Aravalli House rival Khushroo Dastur “Kanga”. In the final year, out of the blue, came a guy named Dawson from the Blue Mountain School (where an English teacher, Sardar Mohammed, had joined them from Lovedale) and whipped us in the sprints. It seemed to me, at the time, as though they had recruited him just for the events. We did, however, retain the Best School title in overall points, beating our perpetual rivals, St. Josephs, Coonoor.

School Campus—Prep, Girls, Junior and Senior School (Now)

The 67 stone steps that connected the Junior- and Senior Schools and, below, the famous courtyard in Senior School

Then, as now, students imbibed sterling values. In the words of the school’s website, “With character and integrity ingrained into the psyche of these young adults, they leave the portals of the Senior School, ready to face the challenges of the outside world with a spring in their step and a song in their heart, gently guided by the ethos of the School motto—‘Never Give In’.” 144

My Early Days and Schooling

Camping, games and fun

The walk up to school from the Lovedale Railway Station past the Bellie Gowda Bridge

Unforgettable is the walk up to school from the Lovedale Railway Station past the Bellie Gowda Bridge (Rail overbridge, the origins of its name still a mystery) and the old swimming pool, arriving at the flagstaff with the Headmaster’s residence to the right. One winter, owing to heavy rains, trees had fallen across the road and elsewhere, as usual. There was on one of the turnings a huge tree nicknamed “Fannie Annie”, and to our dismay, on our return from our holidays, we found a gaping hole. The adventure was raiding Princi’s orchard when plums were just right to be plucked. A raiding party of 4-6 guys covered with a blanket would creep into the orchard past 10 pm. The biggest fears were “Rani”, Princi’s Alsatian, and his Gurkha watchman. We were fortunate that there was no untoward incident, resulting in us getting caught, or bitten by Rani. The reservoir near Big Hill was one of the hiking trails. Cross country running took us past the station and down the dhobi ghat, then past the lake and up again till the jogging trail reached the verdant “pitchies”. What a lovely sight it was to enter “pitchies” against a backdrop of mountains and the turf. Not quite there, were the low-water jump and the high-water jump and, as though all the running was not enough, we got dunked and pulled ourselves together to make the trudge to the finish line. I guess the cross country run was preparing us for the ups and downs in life. No hero here, I did not have the stamina and finished it in the middle of the pack. And there were the spud (potato) fields we passed, reminding me of a dear classmate Borlingiah, a local lad (had a home in the Nilgiris) who was nicknamed “Spuds”. He was an outstanding goalkeeper in football and hockey. Camping in the higher classes was always a learning curve in the art of co-existence. We were taken to several locations over the years— Pykara Dam, Mukurthi Lake, Emerald Lake and others. Right from pitching tents to lighting bonfires, we had a jolly good time. We had two Mukherjees in the teaching faculty. M. Mukerjee was nicknamed “Trout” for his addiction to fishing and encouragement at camps, and C. Mukerjee nicknamed “Bull Mukerji”, a huge man always chewing paan, who taught Hindi and coached Hockey. Four boys were nominated in 1966 for an NCC Advanced Training programme in Kurseong (near Darjeeling). Sunil Narula, Ramesh Venkateshwaran, Ranthi Dev 145

Reminiscence

and I were put to the grind, living in tents and eating out of aluminium plates (dal, chawal and roti), with holes in the ground for toilets. Certainly “advanced” in hardships, including the unreserved train journeys from the school to Darjeeling and back. In 1967, our final year, five of us did a lot of things together: Madan Talreja (“Atom”) was our Headboy (he died rather young). Ravi Shanmugham retired as a Colonel in the Indian Army and now resides in Bangalore, wheeling and dealing in real estate and an absolute scratch golfer who started playing much after I did. His wife Mathangi and he got married very late, long after most of us, and we have enjoyed their hospitality several times. They have two sweet daughters, Tulsi and Pallavi. “Tich” Shiv Sharma, our School Cricket captain, whose fascination for the doctors in A.J. Cronin’s novels led him to quit Engineering in Jaipur and pursue Medicine, resided first in Australia and then in the USA. He made a name for himself in Paediatric Heart Surgery. Beena and I enjoyed Poonam and Tich’s hospitality in Atlanta in 2009. Roy Brown “Blondie” was one of the three sons of Mrs. Brown who taught English. In 1994, I met Roy in Sydney, Australia.

Top: Ms. Bhalla with Mac Middle: (l-r) Mehta, Hari and Trout (M. Mukherjee) Mrs Enos (r) Below: Easter camp at Dodabetta,1967

We did crazy things, even went to a movie at Assembly Rooms. We hired bikes for three days to go to the Government Forest Rest House on the Dodapetta peak. Whoever amongst us conceived the idea needed to be shot. No kid affair trudging with the bike uphill from Ooty to the Peak, it was a distance of 9 km uphill. Food was essentially bread and eggs if I can remember. Managing the downhill slope needed our praise. Coming down an all-weather road at full tick (speed) on a bicycle, praying that the brakes worked, could have been an exhilarating experience, a chance of a lifetime. 146

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But I was the cautious type, lagging behind and worrying about flying out on a bend and landing in Ooty with a fractured bone. We all survived. We were always up to mischief. I recall in Lenny’s class in Maths, we tied a ‘timer’ (an agarbathi) to a red firecracker behind the blackboard. All hell broke loose when the cracker went off. “Lenny” Leonard was a young teacher and took it in his stride, considering his fragile frame. He concealed his skinny body well in dapper suits, but revealed his long strides in the rather skimpy shorts he wore on the race track. He was a good athlete and more than adequately demonstrated it. He was a chain smoker and I am sure some of the guys stole from his reserve. As youngsters we enjoyed playing practical jokes on unsuspecting classmates and teachers. Left: Shiv ‘Tich’ Sharma and Poorna Right: Ravi Shanmugham, Matangi, Tulsi and Pallavi Below: Gopi and Roy Brown, Sydney 1994

In Class Xl, Amarjit Singh Chowdhury was the victim of one such prank. One night four of us carried him fast asleep in his bed to the toilet in Vindhya House around 10 pm. As we made the bend out of the dorm into the home stretch to the toilet, the lights came on. The other three guys dived into their beds since they were closest. I could only dive under somebody’s bed. Our Housemaster “Foxxie” Hari came round with a torch and looked under the bed, under 147

Reminiscence

Left: Past vs Present (Founder’s 1966) “ Lenny” in shorts was the referee Right: Selvapakiam Below: ‘Handi’ Iyengar

which I was hiding. The rest is history. Other teachers I can recall are Mrs.Nair (English), Banerjee (Stick Jaw—Maths), Purshotham (Telugu and Maths), Henry Daniel (Arts), Iyengar (“Handi” taught us Chemistry and ran a school for Madura Coats in Madurai after he left Lovedale). “Stewy” Sreedharan ran an efficient kitchen. It was always nice to be in his good books so that you could walk into his office and request for more, and at his direction the bearers would oblige. We had a kitchen that had a wood fire. It was out of bounds for kids. On cold nights it was nice to sneak in to feel warm. Selvapakiam was a giant of a man who assisted E.R. Reddy in Physical Education. Nobody wanted to get on the wrong side of Selva. He was a fast bowler and had batsmen pissing in their trousers as he ran down to bowl. Ghost stories abounded. There was a story of a student (I assume from class Vlll or above) who was challenged to go to the cemetery and put a nail on a specific tree. He did succeed and when he turned round to return he felt somebody tugging at him. Just the very thought of being in the cemetery was enough to knock him out cold, and he was found the next morning with his battle jacket nailed to the tree. There were stories of ghosts in the large hall, who came in through a window by the only palm tree on the campus. There were other stories of ghosts in the dormitories too. All made for a good laugh in telling the juniors and the yarns were passed on down many generations of students. As a student, I always enjoyed 148

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writing articles for The Lawrencian, the School magazine, particularly after visiting places of interest during the school holidays. Trips to Coonoor or Ooty by the toy train were always fun. When the train moved through tunnels a loud shout of gibberish would erupt; the whole train and the world would know that Lovedale was coming into town. Great times. In the words of Yohan Chacko (Vindhya 1991) in his

The beautiful church, interior and exterior and (above) the cemetery

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YouTube piece titled “Reminiscence 2017” as he sings his way through his memories of school, these lines of the song reflect my choice of words and expression of feelings: “O Lawrence School, its plain to see That in your soul lies a part of me. O Lawrence School, I know it’s true In my soul lies a part of you.”

Teachers and Misadventure When many a headmaster would wink at the system of corporal punishment, he detested the very idea of it for he believed that it was a way of taking the line of least resistance. Rarely, if ever, does corporal punishment deter the others from wrongdoing or, for that matter, rehabilitate the wrongdoer, he would say

A word about “Foxxie” V. Hariharan, our excellent Maths teacher and Housemaster. His diminutive, petite wife Parvathy not only took care of her duties as a teacher, but also managed the family and their baby girl Popsy. He was a great administrator who retained the affection of his wards and at the same time sent a shiver down their spines in case of wrongdoing. I was on the receiving end of his sternness on several occasion, but one specific one vividly comes to my mind. In 1966, in Class Xl, Tich and I were hurrying back from Ooty one Sunday late evening; curfew hours were in existence and one had to be back for roll call by a specified time. We could not get a bus or a taxi at that hour, so we commenced the hike up to school on the main road on foot, sticking our thumb out to get a ride from passing cars. To our luck this beautiful open-top red saloon car stopped and both of us jumped in, as they were heading towards school. We got chatting with the occupants, a bearded gentleman whose name I cannot recall (Khaleeli or Sait?). I do remember that he lived in the estate with an “egg” house on the main road in Ooty, and his pretty friend beside him was Alison Jones (Miss Madras). We were dropped off at the Bellie Gowda Bridge and we trudged up to school. On the short ride we established contact by getting Alison’s phone number. Very promptly the two of us made a date with her for a Sunday movie and lunch at Shinkow’s (the legendary Chinese restaurant of that time). Before this, both of us dropped in on Alison, who lived with her mother in a cottage along the railway track between Lovedale and Ketti. We enjoyed their hospitality in the quaint English cottage, with tea in a cup and saucer, sandwiches and biscuits. In school we were used to ceramic mugs (as opposed to the currently used stainless steel). The next Sunday, both of us dressed in our best, (we were allowed to wear our “home kit” on Sundays) and went off to meet Alison. We had lunch at Shinkows and walked down to the Assembly Rooms. I cannot remember the name of the movie—the whole point was to be with this pretty girl. We were seated in a box. During the intermission, “Foxxie” stuck his head in, and said, “Gopi if you are there, I have a visitor for you.” I got out of the box to see who the visitor was and, to my shock, it was Dad. I briefly went back into the box and said my byes to Alison (that was the last I saw of her) 150

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and Tich. Of all the people in the world visiting on that day was Dad, who had come to Wellington on an official mission and found time to visit his dear son at school on a Sunday. After checking about my whereabouts, he approached my housemaster, V. Hariharan, who sniffed around and found out through his grapevine that Tich and I had gone to the movies in Ooty.

Mr. Hari and Gopi at the ‘Blue Mountains’, Sydney Australia, 1994

My father took me to one end of the Ooty Lake and I received probably one of the tightest smacks of my lifetime. He explained to me the reasons for sending me to such a school and asked me to consider what my mother would think of this incident. Well, the guilt pangs set in thanks to all the emotional whacks. After my father dropped me off at the school, Mr. Hariharan had a go at me. I did not think the situation serious until the next day, when the Headmaster asked for both of us to meet him. In all the years at school, I was entering the Headmaster’s office for the first time, for disciplinary reasons. The Headmaster asked me why he should not rusticate me from the school (I was not even sure what the term meant, but the sternness in his voice communicated the fact that he may consider booting us out of school). I apologised profusely, and the Headmaster told me that I had lost my opportunity to be considered for Prefectship in the next year (1967). I certainly had aspirations, but paid with my indiscretion. Should I hold a grudge against Hari? Well, no. I guess he must have had a say in discussions with the Headmaster, who took a more lenient view on the matter. I repeat Yanni’s thoughts on the Headmaster here for good measure. “As for dealing with his wards, in some ways he was ahead of his time. When many a headmaster would wink at the system of corporal punishment, he detested the very idea of it, for he believed that it was a way of taking the line of least resistance. Rarely, if ever, does corporal punishment deter the others from wrongdoing or, for that matter, rehabilitate the wrongdoer, he would say. He believed that, often, punishment was meted out for an assumed affront to the teacher’s dignity rather than for the purpose of reforming the offender.” There is really not much I can add except that both my Housemaster and the Headmaster (KIT) were institutions in their own rights. Lovedale was KIT and KIT was Lovedale, a giant of a person whose reputation had the school flag flying high in educational circles. 151

Vindya House 2017

The kitchen staff of the senior school

Middle Flats

Class X C

Big bogs “Reincarnated”

Vindhya House motto “With Courage and Faith”

March Past Athletics, 1966, Vindhya led by placard bearer M.N. Ramachandran

152 Senior school dining hall

My Early Days and Schooling

The Senior School Routine The day in Senior School began with a bugle call at 6 am and chota haziri comprising of a mug of tea and a bun (baked in the school). P.T. (Physical training) was from 6.30 to 7 am on the top flats or a jog on the slopes and down, and breakfast at 7.30 am. I was a vegetarian right through my school and college life, with the exception of the holidays (Dad was of the opinion that being a vegetarian gave you better concentration at work. Although not proven at school, I did manage a University Gold medal in my Engineering—a point proven!!). Breakfast was oats porridge followed by dosas, idlis, or upma, milk and a banana. Breakfast was followed by assembly each morning in the Large Hall. Usually the Headmaster gave us news from around the world and made important announcements, and Assembly closed with the School Song and the National Anthem being sung. The Indian Orchestra was initially conducted by Mr. Jitendra Pratap (nicknamed “Goofy”) and thereafter Pagay (who had a cricket team of kids). Classes were from 9 am to 1 pm with a 15-minute break for tea, served on the tea counter (now removed, heaven’s know why?) on the lawns. We all looked forward to it and enjoyed the tea in the sunshine on most days. 1-2 pm was lunch break with extra-curricular activities, such as

1967 Vindhya House with Gutragoo (Mr. Gupta) and Mr. Hari and (above) Colin Brown, the Bugler 153

Reminiscence

Our Sunday kit was the formal wear worn for parades and formal occasions. It was blue woollen serge trousers and jacket with a red band running down the sides of the trousers. The coat had pockets and lapels with a red collar and sleeve ends

art, sculpture, cartoon, sports (by Vaidy), NCC (rifle shooting), extra classes, debating, etc., followed by games after tea. 3.30-5.30 pm was games time and, depending on the season, we had cricket, athletics, football or hockey. The Inter-School Games and Athletics were held to a specified seasonal schedule (there were in excess of 10 schools that participated in the games). The best time was 5.30 to 6.30 pm—shower time (hot!!), community style in cubicles (may be 15-20 together) with a class monitor yelling “Times up” after three minutes. Each guy hurried to grab his towel, and the next batch of guys went into the showers. This shower facility was for all the senior school boys and we lined up like lambs for the slaughter (what discipline). Some made efforts to wash their underwear and hang them up in their respective house toilets, and some just hung them to dry. You could see by the end of the term the whites becoming grey! We were ready for supper by 7.00 pm and after an hour of preparatory work from 8-9 pm, it was lights out, at least for most!! The Housemaster would walk around in his regal attire of pyjamas and a dressing gown, ensuring each one was “tucked in”. Assuring himself that all the kids were in their beds, he would order the lights out. We were given a list of items to be supplied by the parents for each term, including personal clothing. Most of what we needed was supplied by the school—blankets,

Gopi, Guard Commander

With my parents

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linen, pillow covers, towels, and day kit comprising a battle jacket, khaki shorts, khaki shirt, tie, shoes and socks, and house coloured T-shirt. PT wear comprising shorts came from home. PT shoes were brought from home and conformed to standards specified by the school. Undergarments were home supplied, with no standards, but mainly white. Our Sunday kit was the formal wear worn for parades and formal occasions. It was blue woollen serge trousers and jacket with a red band running down the sides of the trousers. The coat had pockets and lapels with a red collar and sleeve ends. All buttons were made of brass, which were required to be polished along with the shoes. Some of the older Sunday uniforms had the crown embossed on the buttons and made good souvenirs. The shoes were polished with “rings”, a high-tech method that put spit and polish in circles. It worked and the shine was something to feel proud of, failing which the ire of a prefect would be meted out. The Headboy (three stripes on the lapel), Vice-Headboy (two stripes), Prefects (single stripe) and Guard Commanders wore a white shirt and tie with a breasted coat with pockets and a belt. It was a smart outfit that made them stand out in the crowd of boys. I had the privilege of wearing such an outfit by virtue of being a Fifth Guard Commander.

The Guard Commanders, Founder’s Day Parade May, 1967

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The Climax: Founder’s Day Founder’s Day was always celebrated on the 14th of May each year. Over the years, with a change in adoption of the education curriculum, the dates changed. Our batch did the Indian School Certificate conducted by the Cambridge University. The months of preparation ended with a week’s programme and the influx of thousands of visitors comprising parents of children, the staff and their families, Old Lawrencians with family in tow, curious onlookers and tourists from Ooty. The first night was a PT display in the middle flats with synchronised exercises with lights and coloured illumination. Lazims was added by E.R. Reddy, which brought us in line with the national rhythm. Gymnastics display with the “horse” and diving through the ring of fire were some of the events I can recall. The middle flats has now good seating sponsored by a junior Old Lawrencian group. In our days you had to survive on slippery slopes with the dew factor adding in. The next day was Variety Entertainment with the Indian Orchestra providing the background music. There were dance dramas out of the Ramayana and other classical works. I remember in Class Vlll or lX, Vinay Vir and I took part in a dance drama as soliders waving a sword. We only had to execute a few steps, but it was enough to claim that we were the key players. There were the Hindi skit and dance performances in the Large Hall, that was jam packed, and one wondered if the balcony could take the weight of the audience.

Top: School Brass Band Below: Mr. Denzil Prince, Band instructor

The next day was the School Parade—on the 14th of May normally. It was an event to look out for, with the Chief Guest in attendance to take the salute. The marching practice under the supervision of Abdul Khader and P.G. Menon was a superb display of absolute unison, including the youngest group— the fifth guard—of which I was a Commander. I can assure you it was far easier to handle the First to Fourth guards than a bunch of playful kids in the Fifth. This event was the ceremony’s signature. 156

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The last guard were the Old Lawrencians, trying to retrace the steps of coordination, a motley lot with a combination of OLs (boys and girls) from the 1950s to the 1960s. Rajeshwari was our Headgirl and I have had the pleasure of meeting her occasionally in Chennai along with her husband Deepak. Madan Talreja (Atom), Talat Ansari, Ravi Shanmugam, and Ravinder Balasingham often had important parts to play in the parade, not to forget the brass band conducted by Denzil Prince (an Old Lawrencian and Headboy in his time) that did a splendid job. In the early years, M.S.P. Senthikumar did a great job as a Drum Major with the staff. There were times when younger kids went faint with the heat of the sun and the attire. They would just droop till they were carried away on a stretcher. It ended with everybody meeting for tea and biscuits on the lawns. I had the pleasure of my father, mother and sister witnessing the events in 1967. After the Assembly, speeches and the prize distribution by the Chief Guest, we were all led into the exhibition of Arts and Crafts (weaving amongst others).

Top: First Day Cover released in 1988 Below: School play, 1968

In the evening was the English play that everybody looked forward to, directed by MacMahon. The play was The New Boy. I auditioned for the main part and lost out to Ashok Vellodi, who was shorter and stockier. He ended up giving a good performance. I remained a Plan B. The next day had the Agenda of the Old Lawrencians carried out in the Large Hall with the elections of Office Bearers and PTA representatives, and it culminated with lunch provided by the school. 157

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The arrival of the President of India, Pranab Mukherjee at the Founder’ s Day Parade, 2017

158

Founder’s Day Activities Reminiscence

159

Reminiscence

In our days it was a sit-down lunch with a printed menu card and all. Beating the retreat on the top flats in the evening was like a curtain drawn on the events. The drums and bugle band was par excellence—a team from Lovedale was represented at the Republic Parade in New Delhi one year. Dinner and dance followed. We graduated, having learnt to dance the foxtrot and the waltz to the music of the ‘Hot Shots’, a local band led by Mr. Enos, the husband of a teacher from Prep School.

The Headmaster’s certificate

In our last year I think we made an attempt to “twist”. It was girls on one side and boys on the other. When a dance was announced you could see the guys charge and make a beeline for the girls of their choice and most succeeded. Those who did not, waited for an

Vindhya House,1966, Ajay Vir (3rd from left), Mr. Nambiar, Mr. Hari, Mr. Gupta and M.N. Ramachandran

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opportunity to tap on shoulders. In 1967 we guys created history by inviting the Nazareth and Hilda girls to the dance, much to the chagrin of the senior girls of Lovedale. This was because of our association with them at a mock UN Debate in Ooty to celebrate the League of Nations. Usha and Geetha Oomen from Nazareth and Hilda made me the USA Ambassador to the UN. They provided me Top left: Bunny Gill, Sanju, with a tailcoat and the Uncle Sam’s hat. There was even a walkout by me during the Beena, Rohini and Viraj debate on Apartheid in South Africa. Good times! The girls were great company, Top right: Mr. & Mrs. Devagnanam with Meera and including the Devagnanam sisters Meera and Nalini, Judy with her blonde hair, Theo Jr, at Nalini’s wedding and Ranthi Dev, amongst others. The next evening was the Old Lawrencians Below: Kausalya Aunty, Kumar Association (OLA) dinner and dance. The venue was normally Ooty and each one (OL 1962) and Jayashree in had to find their way back, irrespective of which “stars” they were seeing. A fine end to Kodaikanal the Founder’s programme. Our June holidays in the final two years were restricted. We had to write the ISC Exam in the month of December1967, when the monsoon was at its worst. The wind blowing and howling through the century old windows would make an ideal screenplay for a ghost thriller. It rained heavily and it was miserably cold, and to add to it, we 161

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had to prepare for what would be our career changer. The study holidays went well and the time drew near for the exams. Once done, it was “Hip Hip Hooray” time. It also meant autograph hunting amongst colleagues and staff. We were on the station platform, bidding one another goodbye as we headed off in different directions, wondering when our next rendezvous would take pace. I was heading for Madras (December 1967).

Old Lawrencians and Reunions

Some of us met up on the 25th Anniversary in Lovedale, organised by our very dear Rajini. We stayed at the Sterling Holiday Resort, and enjoyed a meal at Shinkow’s and at School. Some of us walked down the track to Lovedale

Over the years I have kept in touch many seniors and juniors, like Ashok “Smuggler” Shukla and T.M. “Thair Saadam” Ranga. Particularly memorable were Ajay Vir and M.N. “Rams” Ramachandran. If there was anybody to emulate in sports it was Ajay Vir, a great wicket-keeper/batsman, goalkeeper in hockey and football, and an excellent athlete. It was treat to watch him do the jumps and pole vault, and to add to it all, a real handsome guy, an Adonis amongst the lot. He had many of the girls idolising him. “Rams” was a book of knowledge. He earned a 5 aggregate in the ISC exam. In May 1972, I recall meeting Meera’s father, Theo Devagnanam Sr., the Chairman and Managing Director of The Needle Industries Ltd, Ketti. He offered me a job, with training in England for a year and to return to Ketti to manage one of the shop floors. It was a good offer, but I politely turned it down. I did take him up on the offer to visit them in Hong Kong on my way to San Francisco, and spent three days there in September 1973. I was received by Aunty Shaku in her Jaguar at the Hong Kong Airport. We had a wonderful weekend on board a Chinese junk, and a swim in the bay. In 1989, I took Beena, Rohini, Rukmini and Venkat to visit Lovedale. Over the years there were plenty of OL get togethers in Madras. In 2018, I had the opportunity to take a group of six Freemasons around the school. I thank Col. Thota Sudhakar, the Bursar, for his hospitality. A few of us met up for the 25th Anniversary in Lovedale, organised by our very dear Rajini. We stayed at the Sterling Holiday Resort, and enjoyed a meal at Shinkow’s and at School. Some of us walked down the track to Lovedale. The Class of 1967 met in Pallakad in Pal’s (Bhagwaldas) homestay tharavad in Oct 2013. It was a wonderful trip, which included visiting Pallakad, Chummar’s home and hospitality at Trichur (not to forget viewing his collection of vintage cars), a dharshan at Guruvayur Temple, a visit to a waterfall at Athirappily and finally the dream stop at Kumarakom. We enjoyed a boat ride in the backwaters, and played cards on board; made a trip to Allepey and visited the “Coir King’s” home. The typical fish curry and rice was quite an experience. On our way back I visited John Koshy in Cochin. 162

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Top: Met Sethu in Muscat, Oman, 1979 Indra Gill and Barry at the Blue Mountain Brewery, Charlottesville, 2018 (bottom left), and Ravinder Balasingham, Jal and Gopi, midway Southampton and London, 2007 (bottom right)

September 2017 saw my 1967 batchmates celebrating our 50th Reunion in grand style and, thanks to the ex-Headmaster who was our batchmate, Ramesh Venkateshwaran, who made some outstanding arrangements. Coming all the way from the USA were Arjun Reddy, Tich Sharma, Geethanjali Bora (Narayan), Rafeeq Ahmed and wife, Ranthi Dev and wife, Shiv Cariappa and Amaran. From the UK were Jal Mehta and Ruksana; Sethu from Oman; Chummar from Kerala; N. Ramu, Ramesh V., Thangam and P.C. Mohan from Bangalore; Sunil Narula and Anand Sahay from Delhi; Vijay Kumar (Dooley) from Mumbai; Venkatesh Raja from Rajapalayam; Unnikrishnan from Malaysia; Lalitha from Mysore; the rest, from Chennai, were R. Madhavan, Trevor and Esther, Mallika Swaminadhan and myself, a total of 23 OLs and 32 including spouses. We got to eat the Chota buns, sing anthems in large hall with Denzil Prince, hear the Indian Orchestra and the Brass Band; eat lunch in the senior school dining hall and meet young kids in the Prep, Junior, Senior and Girls school. I must admit that it was the first time I entered the Girls school dormitory without getting reprimanded!! We all stayed in the Savoy and enjoyed the comforts of good dining, including a grand dinner after a talk on Todas by an OL. A list of the classmates appears at the end of this section. The nicknames are mentioned not with the intent to offend any of my classmates but with an intent to recall the wonderful days of school life.

163

50th Year Reunion, Class of 1967, 2017 Reminiscence

OLs’ at Founder’s 1971, the tea ring and the jacaranda tree as a backdrop

25th Year Reunion, Class of 1967, 1992

Gopi, Tich, Madhavan and Charlie Sahay, 164Vindhya House,, 2017

Chacko (LsL), Kumar (’62), Suku (’64) and Vinoo Mammen, Kodai Club

Reminiscence

Class of 1967 Reunion, Kerala, 2013

Rukmini Krishnan (Ruku) and Gillian (’67), 2017

Anuradha and Vikram Nehru (’68), Washington DC, 2013 Sitwat (’68), Oakville, Canada, 2017

Poornima and Arun Kumar (’68), Los Gatos, CA, 2016

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NICKNAME IN SCHOOL

REMARKS (NC: NO CONTACT)

Gabu

Dallas, USA

Amaran

Met at Raja's daughter's wedding and 2017, 50th Reunion

Solicitor M&A

NY, USA

Talat

In touch on the phone whenever in the USA

Marine Captain

Southampton, UK

Ravi

Met at a village inn halfway London & Southampton with Jal in 2007

Bala

Pallakad

Pal

Met in Pallakad along with 7 others in Oct, 2013

Sydney, AUS

Blondie

Met in Sydney, 1994

Boston, USA

Shiv

Met in Lovedale in 2017, 50th Reunion

Business, Planter

Thrissur

Met in Lovedale in 2017, 50th Reunion & attended wedding of kids

Dastur, Khushroo

Hospitality

Sydney, USA

Kanga

Met at Rajini's 67'ers dinner in Jul 15, 2008 in Chennai

Bora, Geetanjali

Doctor, Gynaecology

Baltimore, USA

Geeta

2017, 50th Reunion & Venkat's Birthday in Aug, 2016, Washington DC

Gill, Manjit

Mgt of Trust, Education

Chennai

Bunny

Meet regularly in Chennai

Wright, Gillian Mehta

Travel

Vancouver, CAN

Gilly

My guest in Chennai Dec, 2017

Gopinath S G

Project Management

Chennai

Gopi

Worked in USA, India, Singapore, Malaysia, Indonesia and Oman

Kamath, Prakash

Pooey

Koshy, John Ashok

Industrial Photography

Goa

Young Geech Met in Cochin, 2013

Lalchand, Tahil

Business

Nigeria

Lala

Borlingaiah, Lalitha

Food Scientist Ph. D

Mysore

Spud Queen

Met 2017, 50th Reunion.

Madhavan, R

Doctor, 40-bed Hosp

Chennai

Sambhar

Meet regularly in Chennai, 2017, 50th Reunion

Swaminadhan, Mallika

Travel

Chennai

Chinu

Meet regularly in Chennai, 2017, 50th Reunion

Kennedy, Marilyn D

Delhi

Marilyn

NC except on Facebook

Meenal N

Chennai

Meenal

S. NO.

NAME

PROFESSION

Abraham, Thomas

Amaran, C R

Ansari, Talat

Balasingham, Ravinder

Balasundaram, S R

Bhagwaldas, K S

Business, Cashew

Brown, Roy

Marketing

Cariappa, Shiv

Chummar, AC

LOCATION

166

My Early Days and Schooling

Mehta, Jal

Chartered Accountant

London, UK

Jal

Met 2017, 50th Reunion. Met in London, June, 2007. Great help to Rohini

Shukla, Mina

Travel

Toronto, CAN

Shukibobs

Lost contact in 2017 after having been in touch

Mistry, Zarir R

Mumbai

Zarir

NC. His sister was Miss India in the early ‘70s

Modi, Manek

Baroda

Manek

on WhatsApp group

Mohan, P C

World Bank

Bangalore

Met 2017, 50th Reunion

Nair, Dilip Krishnan

Col. Indian Army

Chennai

Dilip

Meet periodically in Chennai

Nair, Trevor

Col., Doctor, Miot Hosp.

Chennai

Trevor

Met 2017, 50th Reunion and meet periodically in Chennai

Narula, Sunil

Business

Delhi

Jumbo

Met 2017, 50th Reunion and meet in Chennai or Delhi

Patel, Sadruddin

Photography

Chicago, USA

Sadru

Spoke several times over the past 5 years

Rao, Premkumar

Corporate, XLRI

Bangalore

Prem

Speak regularly

Arora, Radhika Mehta

InFlight Magazine Editor

Mumbai

Radhika

Met 2013 in Pallakad with 7 others

Rafiq, Ahmed Syed

Doctor

Alabama, USA

Freek

Met 2017, 50th Reunion

Raja, N K Venkatesh

Business, Cement

Rajapalayam

Raja

Met 2017, 50th Reunion and met at weddings of kids

Raja, KSV

Engineer, IIT

Singapore

Palakundi

Met 2017, 50th Reunion, Singapore and in Rajapalayam to meet his mother.

Rajan, V C S

Madurai

Rajan

Spoke once or twice

Rajee, Deepak

Banker, Chart. Acct.

Chennai

Rajee

Meet regularly in Chennai

Ranthi Dev N

Corporate Glaxo

NC, USA

Ranthi

Met 2017, 50th Reunion, Singapore, Chennai

Rao, E Ramesh Kumar

Ramesh

Kharshikar, Ravibala Gokhale

Pune

Bala

Spoke once or twice

Reddy, Arjun

Milpitas, USA

Pattu

Met 2017, 50th Reunion. Met in USA in 2013 & 2014, 2016 in Hyderabad

Shadagopan, G

Shadagopan

Sahay, Anand

Journalism, Editor

Delhi

Charlie

June 8, 2008 in Chennai and Delhi 2009, & 50th Reunion

Sethuramanathan, EB

Doctor, Orthopaedic

Muscat, Oman

Saapad

Met Oman, 1980, Met 2017, 50th Reunion, Chennai

Shanmugam, Ravi

Col. Indian Army

Bangalore

Ravi

Meet regularly in Bangalore or in Chennai

Biomedical Engg

167

Reminiscence

Sharma, Shiv

Shyla (Krishnadas) G.

Siddiqui, Mashood

Doctor, Paedriatic Cardiology

Atlanta, USA

Tich

Met 2017, 50th Reunion. Met in Atlanta in 2009 and in Delhi in the late ‘60s

Bangalore

Shyla

Spoke once or twice

Stock Market

NY, USA

Mashood

Spoke once or twice in the USA

Subramaniam, G V

Banker

UAE

GV Subs

Spoke several times over the past 5 years

Thapar, S S

Business

NJ, USA

SS Sardar

Spoke once or twice in the USA

Unnikrishnan, D

Thermax

KL, Malaysia

Unni

Met 2017, 50th Reunion. Met in REC Trichy, 1970

Venkateswaran, Ramesh

Training and Education, IIM

Bangalore

Jamshed

Met 2017, 50th Reunion, other occasions in Chennai & Bangalore

Nair, Vijay Kumar

Freight Fwding

Mumbai

Dooley

Met 2017, 50th Reunion.

DECEASED 55

Ramaswamy N

Business, Coffee

Chennai

Ramu

Met 2017, 50th Reunion.

Talreja, Madan

Pastor

Bangalore

Atom

Met in 1969-70 in Bangalore

Nadig, Pradeep Polly Corporate

Pune

Polly

Spoke once or twice

Borlingiah, Shiv S

Ooty

Mani

Nair, Usha

Horsy

Fastest girl in the Nilgiris, ran like a race horse with her mane, NC

Swaminadhan, Rajini

Raj the Fudge

Met regularly in Chennai

Chandrashekaran

Piddler

Dewan, Dilip

Air India

Mumbai

Freddie

Met with Rajini sometime in 2004

Tharakan, George PH

Marketing, GSK

Chennai

Georgie

Met 2013 along with 7 others in Kerala, and in Chennai

Agriculture

Travel

Chennai

168

CHAPTER

10 College Years and Further Education

Bachelor of Engineering (Honours) in Civil Engineering, College of Engineering, Guindy, University of Madras, India; 1968-1973

y combined total of maths, physics and chemistry in the ISC exam made me scrape through with a first class and get the qualifying marks for an engineering seat—a lot easier then than now when the admission levels are fixed at 95 percent. We were the first batch introduced to the semester system—two semesters in a year and you forget about the past six months. This was great instead of waiting a whole year to go through. The first two years had subjects like Chemistry I and II, English I and II, Maths I and II, Physics I and II, Engineering Drawing, Manufacturing Processes, Engineering Mechanics along with practicals (Chemistry lab, Physics lab, and Workshop). We had a pretty teacher in Mrs. Pillai who taught English. I was the class representative of our section (there were three sections). You could see the divide build up between the guys from English-medium and Tamil-medium schools, and this divide continued till we graduated. There was an Andhra quota and we had people join us, who became friends for life. Ramakrishna Reddy, whom we met in Houston, 2009, was passionate about guitars, fast cars and motor bikes and later on bought himself a Cessna twin engine aircraft. His wife Asha is now a lawyer and was a magistrate. Arjun, my classmate from Lovedale, is a Biomedical Engineer and and his wife Sandhya, with whom I stayed in the USA in 2014 and 2016. We meet Ranjit Raghavan (a banker) and his wife Sagari in Chennai fairly regularly. Konda Laxman Suresh 169

Reminiscence

(l to r) Asha and Ramakrishna Reddy; Ranjit Raghavan; and K.L. Suresh

Gopi, Ranadhir and Vikram, Los Angeles, 2014

became a Professor at Carnegie Mellon and very unfortunately had a heart attack in his 50s while scuba diving in the Bahamas. Ranadhir Nayudu (his father Brig. Nayudu was my father’s senior in service.) was in business. I met “Randy” and his wife Vijaya at their home in LA, USA, along with Vikram in 2014. The next lot of guys were the direct admission. We occasionally meet Arcot Vikram (Quality Assurance) in Chennai and once stayed with him and his wife Vasavi in LA, USA, in 2014. A descendant of Periyar, the founder of the DK (later became DMK) political party. His passion for building cars knew no limits). Bharat Krishnaswamy (Quality Assurance/IT) is with Foster’s Australia. We met him and his family in Melbourne in 1994 and once in Chennai around 2010. His father was the Secretary, Ministry of Industry, and his two brothers-in-law were also Secretaries when they retired. N.K. Venkatesh Raja (Buddy from Lovedale) is in Business in Rajapalayam. We attended his children’s wedding. Raja was my roommate in the hostel in Guindy. Devadoss was a classmate of mine in Civil Engineering. He was a Professor in Upstate NY upstate, 170

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but very unfortunately passed away in 2017. Other classmates were Messiah Das, Tapan, V.N. Kumar, Santhanam, Ramkumar, Rajendra Shah, Natrajan, Murthy, Joga Rao, “Chikli”Ajit Viswanth, Bala (of Wang’s Kitchen fame), Krishnachander, Kottur Soundarajan, Raghunath and Sunder. I have made a special mention of Jasbir and Cheenu Manian elsewhere.

Subu and Valli

The hostels in the first two years were old World War II barracks with wooden trusses and tiled roofs and had probably been used by Dad in his time (1941-1945)

With my father’s impending transfer out of Madras, he preferred I stay in the hostel. I used to come home on the weekends to our home at the Fort St. George. The hostels in the first two years were old World War II barracks with wooden trusses and tiled roofs and had probably been used by Dad in his time (1941-1945). We had all sorts of insects floating around and there was no knowing when one would be asleep with either a snake or a scorpion nearby. I remember Ranjit “Huey” pulling a scorpion out of his shoe one day. The food in the hostel mess was above average—good, clean, hygienically prepared South Indian fare with a variety of rasams. Dad was an indulgent father and bought me a Lambretta scooter in the first year of college. It certainly helped with mobility, as distances were long on the campus. Ragging was something to be concerned about, especially in the hostels. I recall with disgust, this Sri Lankan senior who made me measure his room with a matchstick and later on dunked me in the dirty Adyar River behind the campus. The Civil Engineering seniors, comprising Hanu Reddy, Subu, Murali and Prakash, ragged me in a very civil way. We ended being friends for life. Subu and his wife Valli and their children (Vairam and Subu) and grandchildren are very dear to us. Hanu keeps in touch occasionally. Murali is the exuberant one, always smiling despite a tragedy in life. We would make trips to Bangalore together while at college. I recall attending a lecturer, Krishnaswamy’s wedding in Bangalore. Subu loaned me an expensive Leica camera for more than 4 years and I was able to record memories of college and home. Thank you, Subu. Other seniors in the hostel were Arun Joseph, Arun Krishnan, and Scruffy Ashokan (Chief Engineer, Govt. of Namibia) who was the defacto operator of Cyclops (discotheque in Oceanic Hotel). We did a trip across Namibia, Botswana and Zimbabwe in 2015 along with Radha and her family, organised by Scruffy. Others were 171

Home away from home - Aruna, Rajiv and Anita Reddy

Birthday celebrations with (l to r) Karunakaran, Kumar, Prakash, Gopi, Iqbal and Subu, Fort St. George,1969

Class of 1973 with Mukundan, Krishnachander, Bala, Tapan, Murthy and Naganathan at Bala’s Flower and Drum restaurant

(l to r) Ramesh, Gopi, Beena, Mrs. Devadoss, a friend and Devadoss at his daughter’s wedding

Vikram and Vasavi

Sandhya and Arjun Reddy Bharath Krishnaswamy and Gopi, Melbourne 1994

172 “Scruffy” Ashokan and Gopi, 2018

Jasbir, Arshi and Manasmar Cheenu Manian and Ranjini with grandchildren, 2020

College Years and Further Education

Jayachandran, N. Kumar, R.K. Shankar, Ranjit Abraham, Eddy, Koka Ravindra (met him in Pittsburgh 2009), Vishnu, Venu Reddy and Dwarak (met him in Pune 1999 when visiting Venkat who was in the first term of the second year at UWC). Other friends are Iqbal and his loving family (we were always invited for biryani meals, and to share their paya and bread, topped with a cup of chai). Anand and Anbu were a clique. Janakiraman needs mention because he was mentored by my father, and from extremely humble beginnings developed a successful business.

Hostel and Class, Guindy The first two years went by like a breeze. My father’s slide rule came in handy—hand-held calculators were yet to come. It was after Intel developed the first microprocessor (Intel 4004) for the Japanese calculator company Busicom that handheld devices became popular. I bought my first HP 45 (Hewlett Packard) from the Student Union Store on a visit to Harvard University in 1975. We enjoyed plenty of cinema (English, Tamil and Telugu) whilst we were students. Staying in the hostel was fun. I took active part in all the extracurricular activities of the department.

Above: Hostel Block with my scooter MSL 7194, and Below: in the hostel Bharath, Arjun, Vikram, Ramkrishna Nair with Venkatesh Raja seated

Arcot Vikram and I walked up to Tirumala for the Lord’s darshan one year. The third year onwards is when the Civil Engineering subjects were taught: Applied Mechanics, Geology and Soil Mechanics (SM), Physics of Materials, Materials and Construction, Structural Engineering I and II(RCC), Theory of Structures I and II, Computational Methods, Hydraulics and Hydraulic Machineries, Public Health Engineering, Geotechnical Engineering, Civil Engineering Drawing, Design Drawing and Estimating, Survey, and Industrial Management. Electives for Honours were: Transportation, Ocean Engineering, Irrigation and Hydraulic Structures, and Town Planning. Practicals were 173

Reminiscence

Clockwise from top left) Swimming pool; Auditorium; Stadium; and the main entrance, 1972

in Soils and SM, Survey, Hydraulic Lab, and Project, and then there was the Viva Voce. These subjects advanced in content each year. As we had a home in Alwarpet, my mother would come to Madras to help me with home study each year, waking me up at 2 in the morning and serving me black coffee, and basically adjusting my meal patterns to my study schedule. Having stood first in the third, fourth and final year, I dedicate my Gold medal to her for her unstinting commitment in ensuring I met my study schedule. I would go up to Tirumala each year and tonsure my hair.

The family at CEG for the Class of 1945 Reunion, 1970

In the last three years, I was taught by Ganesan (Ocean), Swaminathan (Soil Mechanics), 174

College Years and Further Education

and Chittaranjan (RCC), Srinivasan (Survey), Arunachalam (Structures), and Krishnaswamy, and Professors, Dr. Ing. S.R. Srinivasan (Theory of Structures), Dr. Mohanakrishnan (Hydraulics and Irrigation), Prof. Natrajan, Prof. Peer Mohammed and Professor Dr. Raj from the neighbouring Alagappa College of Technology (A.C. Tech.) who taught Transportation and Urban Planning. Prof. Dr. Ing. S.R. Srinivasan was my Class Teacher and mentor. We often wondered what the ‘Dr. Ing’ represented and with courage we asked him one day. It indicated that his doctorate had been done in Dresden (then East Germany).

Above: Class of 1973, Civil Dept. study tour with Ganesan, Lecturer Above right: Prof. Dr. Ing. S.R. Srinivasan Below: Testimonial from Prof. Dr. Ing. S.R. Srinivasan

Thanks to Prof. Srinivasan’s guidance and help, I was able to take two extra subjects each semester for a total of 6 semesters, i.e. 12 subjects for me to qualify for the B.E. (Honours). I was the only student that year to get an Honours and a Gold Medal. It is with pride I recollect that the Professor in his testimonial stated I was the best student in his twenty-three years of teaching, who also displayed leadership and sportsmanship. I had aspired to be the President of the Civil Engineering Society, where for two years I represented the class, but unfortunately a divide cropped up and instead of being a unanimous choice I was unseated by a few votes. That was the first of life’s disappointments after the loss of Prefectship in Lovedale. I did 175

Beena and Dad (from Jabalpur) after the Convocation, University of Madras, 1976

Bottom right: Advertisemnent in the newspaper from my proud Father, after I received the Gold Medal and B.E. Hons

176

College Years and Further Education

Receiving the awards from His Excellency, Mr. Sukhadia, Governor of Tamil Nadu, 1976

not allow it to dampen my spirit of cooperation, but instead went about society duties as though I was the President, which the Professor noticed as my attribute. My namaskarams and profound gratitude to Prof. Srinivasan, without whose encouragement and drive I would not have pushed myself in life and brought laurels to my school, college and family, particularly to my father whose navigation and support in life moved me forward.

Post Graduate Studies In the final year, I decided I wanted to go abroad to do my post graduate studies. I went through the motions of writing TOEFL, GRE and SAT. My senior, Hanu Reddy (class of 1971) had trail blazed a new path to do “Construction Management”. I decided to do Construction Management too. I applied to five major universities: Stanford, Berkeley, Purdue, Drexel and Syracuse, got admission to all and became spoilt 177

Reminiscence

College of Engineering, Guindy, Class of ‘73, Silver Jubilee reunion, December 26, 1998 Sitting (l to r); R. Raghavan, B. Srinivasan, S. Raman, M.T. Prasanth, T.R. Kesavan, Asha Ram Mohan, R. Rajagopalan, T.V. Naganathan, K. Swaminathan, V. Chandrasekar, V.R. Balasubramanian, V. Ram Kumar, S. Raja Ram, B. Chandrasekaran Standing 1strow (l to r); R. Krishnachander, Jasbir Singh Taneja, R. Kalyanaraman, K. Kuppuraj, R. Ram Kumar, K. Sridharan, S. Raghunathan, C. Venkatesan, D. Vishwanathan, B. Bharathan, B. Rajmohan, S. Shantaram, K. Sukumar, C.V. Gopalakrishnan, S. Chandrasekaran, E. Gunasekaran, Amarjit Singh Chowdry 178

Reminiscence

Standing 2nd row (l to r): K.V. Prabhakar, S. Saravanamuthu, B. Kuppuraj, V.S. Mahalimgam, T.K. Venkateswaran, Natarajsiva, D. Subramaniam, N.R. Murali, B. Ramesh, M. Srinivasan, B. Ramesh, G.A. Bharathi, M. Sunderram, G. Pandian, M.P. Jayakumar Standing 3rd row (l to r): N Ravi Kumar, R. Sundar, R.V. Sanjeevi, Jayaraman, G. Ganapathi Raman, G.V. Narasimhan, V.S. Vijayaraghavan, Venkat Rao, T. Thangamariappan, P. Jambulingam, T. Ramaswamy, U.P. Venkatasubramaniam, N. Devadoss, T.R. Girinarasimhan Standing 3rd row (l to r): N. Lokabhiraman, S. Natarajan, R. Kesavan, R. Madhavan, K. Shankar, G. Bharadwaj, R. Kalyanaraman, K. Venugopal, K.S. Manian, S.G. Gopinath, V.N. Kumar, B. Sriram, D. Swaminathan 179

Reminiscence

for choice. The overriding factors were staff, content and cost of study. As against Stanford’s USD 5000, the Berkeley cost was USD 3500, and since my father had commuted his pension, cost became a major criterion. I chose Berkeley and had no regret in my choice, as the name carried weight in later years during my career. In Singapore, I was known as the guy with a degree signed by President Ronald Reagan, who was at that time the Governor of California and President of the Regents of University of California, Berkeley.

My daughter Rohini with Hanu and Subu at my 50th birthday, 2001

Running around for an RBI (Reserve Bank of India) clearance and then to get the foreign currency I required was a nightmare. Luckily for me, Dad’s relative Mr. Mohan Das was an officer in the RBI and he facilitated the movement of my papers. I had my first term tuition fees sent to Berkeley before I landed there. The exchange rate to convert Rupees into US dollars in 1973 was Rs. 8 to a dollar as against Rs.75 to a dollar now (May, 2020).

1973 – 1974: Master of Science in Civil Engineering, majoring in Construction Engineering, University of California, Berkeley, United States of America I had a host of send-off parties. My family, relatives and friends came to see me off at Meenambakkam Airport. My mother was absolutely shattered, not knowing whether her son was going to return to India, as there was enough precedence in known families where the son would marry and settle down in the USA. She was in tears. It was the first overseas trip for a member of the family in that generation; I was a sort of pioneer. The premium I paid for the “insurance” that I did not bring home a ‘Blondie’ for a daughter-in-law is that I got engaged to Beena, a separate story elsewhere which needs its place in my history. California here I come.

All set to take off...

I got to visit a number of places on my way to Berkeley. Thanks to my prospective father-in-law, Col. D. Sanjeev Rao, I enjoyed the hospitality of his partner, Sardar Jaswant Singh Bajaj in Singapore (colour television here was a novelty for me) and 180

College Years and Further Education

Above: Birthday/send-off party organised by parents, September Osaka (Jaswant’s brother Balbir). Airlines in the yesteryears offered layovers to attract 15, 1973 business. I was lucky enough to squeeze two days in Bangkok, where the presence Below: Bidding goodbye to friends and, (right): consoling Mom

of American GIs was overwhelming with the Vietnam War nearing its end. I had a three-day stay with the Devagnanams in Hong Kong, one-and-a-half days in Tokyo and two days in Honolulu. In each place, I got to visit sightseeing spots and enjoy local cuisine. A fascinating chapter in my life story was unravelling before my eyes. I was getting to see, feel, hear and smell what I had read and seen in the USIS and The British Council or seen in the movies. I flew by Pan-Am out of Madras and got a feel of various airlines—Thai, Japan, Cathay and TWA—and their inflight services. I arrived in the San Francisco International Airport with the Scott McKenzie (1967) song on the PA system: 181

Why I Chose Berkeley

“The University of California, Berkeley (UC Berkeley, Berkeley…), is a public research university in Berkeley, California. Founded in 1868, it is the oldest and flagship campus of the University of California system and has been ranked by numerous major education publications as among the top 10 universities in the world. …Berkeley alumni, faculty members and researchers include 107 Nobel laureates, the third most of any university worldwide, as well as 25 Turing Award winners and 14 Fields Medallists. They have also won 19 Wolf Prizes, 45 MacArthur Fellowships, 20 Academy Awards, 20 Pulitzer Prizes, and 207 Olympic medals. …Berkeley has become one of the leading universities in producing entrepreneurs, and its alumni have founded or co-founded many companies worldwide, including Apple, Tesla, Intel, eBay, Softbank, AIG, and Morgan Stanley.” Wikipedia On a lighter vein, the website admitsee.com has this to say: From school colours and clocks to the secret steam tunnels, UC Berkeley has a lot of fun (and quirky) facts. 1. Standing at 307 feet tall, the Campanile (Sather Tower) is the third tallest bell and clock tower in the world.

182

2. The campus colours are blue and gold. Blue was chosen for the California sky and ocean and the Yale graduates that moved west to establish the university and gold was chosen for the “Golden State.” 3. It’s tradition for students to roll down 4.0 Hill on campus to get good grades. If you step on the Berkeley seal nearby, however, it’s said you’ll be cursed for the year. Bonus: The stone ball in front of the Campanile is now referred to as “4.0 Ball.” Rubbing it before taking an exam is considered good luck. (I wish I had known!) 4. A gold nugget found at the Bancroft Library is believed to be the piece of gold that John Marshall discovered on January 24, 1848, to set off the California Gold Rush. 5. There’s a series of interconnected underground steam tunnels that was built in the early 1900s to generate power for the campus. In the 1960s, students protesting one of the Chancellor’s policies regarding the Vietnam War chained the Chancellor’s doors together. With no other way to escape, the Chancellor used the steam tunnels to escape. 6. After this protest in the 1960s, the exterior double doors of the Chancellor’s office were changed so they only had one doorknob and that remains today. 7. The Free Speech Movement started in 1964 at UC Berkeley and led to a college campus phenomenon that was first inspired by the struggle for civil rights and fuelled by opposition to the Vietnam War. 8. Despite Berkeley’s liberal reputation, the Berkeley College Republicans is one of the largest student organizations on campus and is the largest College Republican organization in California. (I was on the campus at the Greek amphitheatre where it all started for the removal of President Nixon in 1974 during the Watergate Investigations.) 9. The California Victory Cannon was donated by the class of 1964 and continues to be fired at the beginning of every home football game, after each score, and after each victory. 10. The Big C was built in 1905 and sits in the hills overlooking campus. Other University of California campuses have since constructed their own versions of the Big C.

183

Reminiscence

“If you are going to San Francisco, be sure to wear some flowers in your hair. If you are going to San Francisco you are gonna meet some gentle people there. …”

The House was created as a gift from John D. Rockefeller, Jr. specifically to foster relationships between students from different countries

Registration card

International House, Berkeley My baggage was tagged to Berkeley. My first helicopter ride was from SF International to the helipad at Berkeley and was filled with excitement—I was about to reach my destination. Oh, Oh, not so. I landed in Berkeley with the only other passenger on board, who took off in a jiffy in a taxi. It was before 8 am and there was not a soul or a cab in the helipad. Worry was beginning to grow in me. I had no coins to use on a telephone. Just then, as luck would have it, a Professor of English at Berkeley had come to drop his wife who was heading to San Francisco on the return. I mustered courage to ask for a ride and he unhesitatingly offered to drop me at the doorsteps of the International House at Berkeley (Piedmont) some ways off. He made my day, and I thanked my lucky stars. Also known as ‘I-House’, it had been opened in August 1930 as a Students Housing and Residence on 2299 Piedmont Avenue, Berkeley, California, with a capacity to accommodate 579 residents comprising of advanced undergraduates, graduate and professional students and visiting scholars. The House was created as a gift from John D. Rockefeller, Jr. specifically to foster relationships between students from different countries. The House is the subject of a documentary called The Visionaries: International House, highlighting how the International House on the University of California Berkeley campus has served as one of the largest, most diverse, residential global communities in the world. It was designed by noted Bay Area architect George Kelham. The International House has also been home to many ambassadors and politicians, including Zulfikar Ali Bhutto (1940s) and John Kenneth Galbraith (1931-32). I-House office opened at 9 am and I was assigned a room with a roommate, a lawyer from Thailand, Kasem Vejasilp who was the son of a very prominent lawyer there. He was a real nice bloke, but a continuous chain smoker (in those days there was no policy on smoking). He would get parcels of Dunhill cigarettes from New York and each day would leave a packet of Dunhill on my desk. For the first month I carefully resisted the temptation, but alas, as Mark Twain said, “There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.” I was not a smoker till then, but I tried one; the one became a pack of 20 for a week; until I got out of the International 184

College Years and Further Education

House after three months, by which time I had started to smoke 5-10 a day. (By the time I started to work in Singapore I was smoking 50 a day until, after a bad dream, I abruptly ditched the habit in 1989.)

‘International House’, Berkeley

Co-ed was an interesting experience. People formed their own groups. We would meet after dinner or head out to the Student Union’s Pub for a beer. Our group comprised of Dr. Vasan, Suzanne Shepherd Rice, Shiela (from Guyana), Arpita and Jayashree. One Christmas week, four of us drove down to Disneyland and San Diego Safari Park, Zoo, and Sea World. We even took in a play in an old theatre. Others in the International House were Hartmut and his wife Gertrude, Gidwani, Doctor, Douglas, Shigero Watanabe, Rodica and Pavel Stoffel, Stefan and Heike Justi and Javed Minhas. International House was indeed interesting. Long weekends trips were arranged for international students to different parts of California (Fremont, Redding, Los Gatos, Tahoe) to live with American families. I am still in touch with the Knaebels (Gene and Gwen) with whom I stayed in 1974 in Redding, Ca. I visited them during my stint in the USA and also paid them a visit in 2011. Gene is no more (RIP). He died in 2018 and I still occasionally talk to Gwen and their children. To me they were

(l to r): Vasan, Gopi, Hemachalam and Bill. Seated Yogita, Denise and Arpita

(l to r); Jayshree, Arpita, Vasan and Shiela Ravinder Singh Sethi and Gopi

185

Reminiscence

Top left: Rodica and Pavel in SF, 1974 Bottom left: Hartmut and Gertrude, 1973 Bottom right: Gwen and Gene Knaebel, Redding, CA

America. With them I went skiing on the slopes of Shasta Mountains, trout fishing and sailing in Shasta Lake and Whiskey Town lake. I enjoyed Thanksgiving dinners with their family. I bought my first car from a car dealer on one my trips in Redding, a 10-year-old golden Buick Riviera (1964 model) for US$1000. What a beauty she was! It had all the perks of my BMW that I bought here in India in 2011(motorised sliding car seat, adjustable steering column, motorised windows and side view mirrors, and the works). Unfortunately, I failed to check the air-conditioning and realised too late that I had got taken by a car dealer—haven’t you heard that before! True to movie stereotypes, 186

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he was wearing checked pants, white shoes and a red jacket! I sold it for US$ 750 after two years in the same condition (mind you the car got stolen twice and found). The hall in International House was a good meeting place and I recall an event when the “Yanks” went after the “Brits” during a royal event, which I believe was the marriage of Princess Anne to Lt. Mark Phillips in Westminster Abbey in 1973. The food on campus was difficult to get used to, bland after Indian curry, but I gradually got used to soups, breads, salad, yogurts, main course and desserts. We make the lives of our hosts, including my kids in the USA, a bit easier with our food habits when outside the country. My Buick Riviera (1964) and Beena

After leaving International House I spent three months with Ravinder Singh Sethi (now a PhD. in Botany, I would presume) as a roommate in an apartment on Bancroft. He was an excellent cook of Punjabi food but a little indiscreet in his way with his girlfriends. I was the official dishwasher. We made a trip to Tahoe one weekend with his Japanese girlfriend. My father called once and Ravinder’s girlfriend spoke to the operator in India. The operator reported to Dad that Gopinath was not available but Mrs. Gopinath was on the line. All hell broke loose, and Beena spoke to me at a cost of Rs.10,000 (a kingly sum) just to ascertain the truth that I was unmarried! Another friend was Dr. Bernd Klein of West Germany, on his way to a doctorate in Law, with whom I had made a trip to Yosemite. He was much older than me, but we were great buddies. His niece Bettina was the one who told me that he had passed away. One weekend he called his home in Germany without a hassle and suggested I call home from his landline. I booked a call (those were not days of direct dialling) to India and waited patiently and had to sleepover to receive the call after 36 hours. I went to a rodeo in Livermore with a French colleague from the I-House.

Heike Justi and Stefan (who had just earned his flying licence) invited me for a plane ride. Without giving it a thought, A Sunday afternoon with Ravi, Gopi, Ravinder and Yousuf Saeed, Berkeley 1974 I accepted the invitation. We drove to the 187

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Bernd Klein and his wife

I was a member of the Telugu Association of North America and was delighted to join the crowd occasionally for a good Telugu movie and homemade food

Oakland Airport, and we flew to Monterrey. On his first attempt to land, Stefan overshot the runway and had to take off again and made the landing the second time! We strolled down to the pier at Monterrey and enjoyed the afternoon, little realising there was an impending problem awaiting us on our return. At around 5 pm, we took off smoothly. Approaching Oakland Airport, Stefan called in to the ATC for permission to land, and guess what, “Permission denied”! Stefan did not have ILS (Instrument Landing System) rights for night flying. It was winter and it got dark by 5.30 pm. We were told to land at the Livermore airport. Livermore was a good 40 miles away. We landed safely to find not a soul, no taxis and only a pay phone. There were no cell phones in those days, nor a call taxi system. I called several friends and finally a Japanese classmate, Shigero Watanabe, agreed to drive down and pick us up. It was midnight by the time we got home. Quite a trip! Some of the memorable events while I was at Berkeley are the removal of President Richard Nixon (Watergate Investigations), the movement that started in Berkeley and spread across the USA. The other is the kidnapping of Patty Hearst in 1974 on Haste Street in Berkeley, close to where I lived, by the Symbionese Liberation Army. I was a member of the Telugu Association of North America and was delighted to join the crowd occasionally for a good Telugu movie and homemade food. Sastry of United Airlines was the chief organiser along with L.B. Reddy of Berkeley. “Streaking” was big in Berkeley and at a drop of a hat you would have boys and girls running in the nude. Rick Orlando, an active social nudist most of his life says, “Streaking is an outgrowth of the culture’s extreme repression of the human form. Being out of one’s clothes is so harmless, yet so ridiculously taboo, that some people take advantage of that incongruity to both simultaneously amuse and offend people, without really hurting anyone other than it being intentionally disruptive.” In those days, police often practised “catch and release”. Nowadays, one is likely to be put on the sexual offenders list.

Civil Engineering Division, University of California, Berkeley – McLaughlin Hall I suffered from jet lag and found myself fighting sleep in all the classes for the first month. On my first day, I met my Professor, Dr. Keith C. Crandall, who then introduced me to Professor Ben C. Gerwick, who handled other classes in Construction Management. Later, I was introduced to the Chairman of the Engineering Department, 188

Berkeley through the years Reminiscence

Berkeley, 2014

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Dr. Carl Monismith. Professor Crandall, my mentor, was in charge of the Engineering and Project Management subjects in the Construction Engineering Department which was a division of the Civil Engineering School, and he had his office at 214, McLaughlin Hall on the Berkeley Campus. Prof. Crandall was keenly interested in the research areas of computer utilization, construction scheduling and research allocation, management systems, operation research applications and risk analysis. He had a PhD. in Civil Engineering from Stanford University in 1971, an M.S. in Civil Engineering from the University of Washington in 1963 and a B.S. in Civil Engineering from the University of Washington, 1962. We were about 20 students in the class and mostly from the Corp of Engineers whose age group was from 28 to 50 years. I was a fledgling at 22 years with practically no experience in Construction. There was another Indian, Patel, whose family, you guessed right, was in the motel business. He did not last a semester. It was pioneering days for the Construction Management course and there was a structured syllabus, as in other tested and tried disciplines, headed by a veteran in the construction industry—Prof. Ben. C. Gerwick.

Visiting my school, 2014

The subjects were very interesting and certainly prepared me for the construction industry: Construction Services Marketing (one had to select a product or service and face the class with a presentation and questions), Advanced Foundation Construction, Management of Human Resources, Construction Scheduling and Resource Allocation, Advanced Construction Estimation (we were given real-time overseas projects to estimate and teams competed in submitting bids), Cementatious Materials (Prof. Mehta was an expert), Administrative Accounting, Industrial Building Systems, Construction of Harbour-Coastal-and-Ocean Structures, Construction Organisation and Management, and Management of International Construction (A team of four was assigned to build a project at an ocean terminal in Basra, Iraq. We were asked to think the project through from concept to execution and envisage problems of going upstream in the river system that empties into the sea—people, material, equipment and money. One of the best classes, it was conducted by Professor Gerwick. I attended and it served me well in all my overseas assignments). I consider it incredibly fortunate to have been a student of Prof. Ben. C. Gerwick and enjoyed all his classes, as well as those by guest lecturers from Bechtel and other major builders. 190

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I was even a guest at his home for a Christmas dinner in 1973 and met his family. I missed an opportunity in 1976 to meet him in New Delhi as Beena had just been declared in the family way. On my completion of the course in the spring quarter 1974, during the viva voce, Professor Crandall gave me a tuition waiver of US $750. The compassion was typically American and well received.

Berkeley Classmates My best friend in class was Lt. James Kovalcik, a Corp of Engineers student just returned from a naval posting in Italy. He and his wife

Prof. Ben C. Gerwick Jr., Gopi and Prof. K.C. Crandall

Commencement Ceremony, 1974 191

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Professor Ben C. Gerwick, Berkeley – A Tribute program in Construction Engineering and Management from 1971 to 1989. … Among Ben’s honours and awards were membership in the National Academy of Engineering and the National Academy of Construction. He was an Honorary Member of the Concrete Societies of Great Britain, Germany, Sweden, Norway, and France, as well as the American Society of Civil Engineers, American Concrete Institute, and Prestressed Concrete Institute. He was the recipient of the Freyssinet Medal from the International Federation of Prestressing (FIP) and the Medal of Honor from the Prestressed Concrete Institute, as well as the Golden Beaver Award for Engineering from the heavy construction industry, the Distinguished Service Award from the Deep Foundation Institute, and the Outstanding Projects and Lifetime (OPAL) Award from American Society of Civil Engineers.

I cannot find a better way to salute Professor Gerwick than to use some of the words from an obituary by the Home Secretary of the National Academy of Engineering, Robert B. Bittner. “With the death of Ben Gerwick, Jr. (1919-2006), the nation lost one of its foremost construction engineers. … He was known worldwide for his pioneering work in pre-stressed concrete and his creative innovations in marine construction and deep foundations. … Ben’s innovations yielded him six patents and made possible the successful manufacturing, transport, and installation of prestessed piles up to 150 feet in length. This work led the use of prestressed concrete in offshore structures that could resist sea ice and icebergs in the Arctic and Subarctic. … He provided construction engineering for the marine foundations of more than 26 major bridges worldwide. … Ben also made major contributions to the construction industry through his work at UC Berkeley, where he initiated and led the highly successful graduate

… Ben was a highly skilled communicator, and his writings include more than 200 technical papers, book chapters, and three technical books that are widely used in the construction industry… In 2005, he completed his fourth book, The Bridge Beyond (Vantage Press, Inc.), a novelistic autobiography of a career in engineering. In 1999, the editors of Engineering News Record (ENR) identiﬁed Ben as one of the “125 TOP PEOPLE” whose efforts in the construction industry singularly and collectively helped shape this nation and the world. That same year, Ben reﬂected on what he considered the most rewarding aspect of his 54-year career. Rather than the awards and recognition he had received, or even the major projects in which he had been involved, the most valuable to him were his many close friendships with dedicated people who were enthusiastic about getting things done, people who faced challenges creatively and had the courage to use their training and technical skills to accomplish great things. … As an added reward, many of these engineers and contractors had been his students. … Ben was a brilliant engineer, but he was able to lead and inspire people because of his human qualities and his sincere interest in them. Ben was the ethical and professional compass for many engineers in design and construction. We are fortunate to have known and worked with him, and we will miss him dearly.” I share Bittner’s thoughts and reverence for Professor Gerwick. I was very fortunate to have been mentored by him. He taught not merely the science of Engineering and Construction, but also taught and modelled human values and creativity. 192

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Cynthia made me feel at home. They invited me to BBQs and class parties in their home. Jim and Cynthia took me to the Cal football game and to swim in the pool inside their condominium in Orinda. I was fascinated by their two cars. One was a Fiat Cabriolet and his personal favourite was a Volkswagen Beetle painted with an advertisement for Irish Springs soap. Cultural differences in spoken English got me into awkward situations more than once. During one of his parties, Jim raised his glass and said, “Chin Chin”. I was next to Cynthia and I proceeded to put my chin against her chin when I heard Jim’s loud voice say, “You kiss my wife, I will kill you.” I had obviously misunderstood the meaning of the Italian toast of “cin cin” (pronounced chin chin, meaning ‘cheers, to your health’). It was likely derived from marketing efforts in the late 19th century by the sweet, red, Italian vermouth brand, Cinzano. On a lighter vein, in Japanese the word “chin” means penis. So when Chin Chin was said to a Japanese, he thought he was being insulted. Well, what can you say for a dumb Indian? One time, I asked Professor Williamson’s secretary for a “rubber” and got a hard stare in return, and then she asked if I needed an “eraser”. On another occasion I asked somebody if they wanted a “blower”, meaning a fan, which obviously had a different meaning assigned to it. Catching up with culture and language is a hard road to travel and you can’t win them all. Above: Cynthia and Jim with their baby, Berkeley 1975 Below: Sailing with Jim, SF Bay, 1975

My classmates in the Construction Management accepted me and I made an effort to be one of them. After leaving Ravinder at Bancroft, I moved in with my classmates James Partridge, William Burke and Terry Holland into a beautiful home on the Berkeley Hills. It was paradise, overlooking the bay with the Golden Gate Bridge. There were some beautiful sunsets I can never forget. Thomas Whitford was another friend I made whilst living in the Berkeley Hills. Other classmates I can recall are Dan Masadeo (I attended his wedding in Mountain 193

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In this one instance, I cannot but cite the views of Shashi Tharoor. “As an Indian schooled in the English language, I have long been fascinated by its different variants in use around the world—from the Singaporean “la” suffixed to every sentence to the Australian “G’day” prefixed to every greeting. But most compelling are the multiple differences between British and American English, the two languages fighting for dominance in the Anglophone world. In my first week on a US university campus, I asked an American where I could post a letter to my parents. “There’s a bulletin board at the Student Centre,” he replied, “but are you sure you want to post something so personal?” I soon learned that I needed to “mail” letters, not “post” them (even though in the US you mail them at the “post office”). In Britain, one concludes a restaurant meal by asking for the bill, and conceivably paying by cheque; in America, one asks for the check and pays with bills. What the Brits call chips are fries in America; what the Yanks call chips are crisps in Britain. An English friend of mine says he nearly had a heart attack on a flight in the US when the American pilot announced that the plane would be airborne “momentarily”. In British English, “momentarily” means “for a moment”, and he says he thought the pilot was suggesting an imminent crash after take-off. In American English, however, “momentarily” means “in a moment”, and the pilot was merely appeasing the passengers. The plane took off, stayed aloft, my friend’s heart stopped thudding, and he lived to tell the tale. But he understood the old adage that Britain and the US are countries divided by a common language. Anecdotes abound about the misunderstandings that arise when foreigners come to the US thinking that they know the language... Shashi Tharoor

Kelvin Yu, Dennis Wai and Gopi, Berkeley 1974

View), Dick Cowan (the most inquisitive student whose questions enlightened everybody), and “cowboy” Timothy (he dressed like one and always wore tall boots and a hat). There were days I would hitch a drive with Jim Partridge into San Francisco once I had started working. It was such a joy to hear him swear as we got closer to SF City with vehicles crisscrossing lanes. I still use a lot of his favourite expletives when the situation demands it. I would drive into the city when I slept through the alarm, and it was too late to catch the BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit). Parking was expensive at US$5 an hour. I would find a spot two kilometres away for US$5 for the whole day. One late evening, as I approached my car, I heard someone say, “Freeze”. In the darkness I realised that there were two youngsters trying to start the car (Buick). Freeze I did and I yelled that it was my car. That evening anything could have happened—a shot could have rung out! The two guys bolted and I managed to retain the car. 194

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Marriage

I remember the first time Beena and I met. She was wearing a yellow saree, and was very attractive. With the Colonel’s permission, the next day I took Beena out on a drive so that we could get to know each other

I had got engaged to Beena before leaving for the USA in September of 1973. It was interesting how the whole thing happened. Eligibility is the key word I guess. It got around through family and friend circles of my parents that I was completing my engineering and heading for the USA. There were some girls that came up for matches on an arranged marriage basis. Dad’s senior in the services, Col. Chowdhury, suggested that I meet Col. Draksharam Sanjeev Rao’s third daughter, Beena, in Hyderabad. Col. D.S. Rao was an RIMC, Dehradun product and part of the Madras Regiment before he took premature retirement to start his business in Hyderabad. Mom and I flew down from Visakhapatnam in early June 1973 with the express instruction from Dad that I see the prospective match and come home to discuss it. We were invited to tea at the Colonel’s residence at Gagan Mahal, Secunderabad. I remember the first time Beena and I met. She was wearing a yellow saree, and was very attractive. With the Colonel’s permission, the next day I took Beena out on a drive so that we could get to know each other. We drove down to the Golconda Fort and Gandhipet Lake. My mother approved of her and I discussed the match with Dad when we got home. We got engaged on June 10, 1973. Beena and I courted, visiting each other till my departure to the USA in September 1973.

Lakshmi and Col. Sanjeev Rao, my in-laws

Beena, a smile that launched Gopi’s ship, 1973

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Whilst I was in America, there were frequent exchanges of letters, cards and telephone calls. I completed my MS at the University of Berkeley and I was expected to return and get married. It was cruel to keep Beena waiting. I landed a job in 1974, and after a year, I returned as promised. Beena and I were married on June 29, 1975. Our marriage took place at the Hyderabad Indoor Stadium with about 2,000 people in attendance, including Vengal Rao, the Chief Minister of Andhra, at a morning muhurtham (thankfully at a reasonable hour unlike a lot of Andhra midnight weddings) and a reception in the evening. We were both out for the count that evening with having to stand up and sit-down for each visitor and with all the handshakes. The two families made a trip to Tirumala and thereafter headed to Jabalpur, where my father was posted, for a wedding reception. The wedding reception was attended by the station officers and their families. Beena and I returned to the USA after a hectic time in India. During the wedding I had caught a bug—Delhi Belly—and was in recovery mode for the rest of my time till we caught the plane to the USA. Engagement at Hyderabad, June 10, 1973

Beena’s Family A word about Col. Sanjeev Rao and his family. After going through several partnership upheavals, including one with Dharam Teja, he settled down with Jaswant Singh Bajaj of Singapore and his family (Kuldeep Singh Swani in Bombay and Harbhajan Singh in Hyderabad) to set up Krishna Bottlers Pvt. Ltd. to bottle (300 bottles per minute) and distribute Coco-Cola in Hyderabad and Andhra Pradesh. Started in 1967, it was a very successful venture until good old “Georgie” Fernandes decided in 1977 that he wanted Coco-Cola out of India. The company continued to manufacture a drink called Nova Cola, with their own formula, and related aerated beverages. 196

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Elders at the Muhurtham - Chandrasekharam Naidu, Chandramouli (Beena’s paternal grandfather), CM Vengal Rao and Col. Rao

Walk to Tirumala, after the wedding

Wedding reception in Jabalpur, July 1975 198

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The Colonel was a great companion and friend to me. He was a dynamic visionary of his times and an inspiration to me. The ‘licence raj’’ was not an easy time, but he managed to get several licenses to manufacture products, and one in conjunction with a trawling business in the Far East. He was very well connected with all the who’s who in Delhi and in Hyderabad. He dressed immaculately in safari suits and took great pleasure in running his comb through the little hair that remained. He was a man of his word and well respected as a leader amongst all the Coco-Cola bottlers in India and abroad.

Col. Sanjeev Rao with prospective collaborators (John’s Manville), Denver 1975

I had the opportunity of meeting Col. Sanjeev Rao in Houston and stayed with him at Dr. Potu Rao and Rajeswari Aunty’s home in 1974, and with him I met Mr. Charles Dunbar, ex-President of Coco-Cola and the Secretary of Energy in President Carter’s cabinet. It gave me an idea of what Corporate America was all about. The Colonel and I flew together to Denver to meet a manufacturer of insulation materials, Johns Manville. We hired a car at the airport and I recommended we stay in Howard Johnson’s (student thoughts). He said to me, “Gopi, it is important to stay in a good hotel, especially when doing business.” Sure enough, one of the first questions to the Colonel was to ask where he was staying. Promptly came the answer, “The Hilton”. We parted ways in Denver. I flew back to San Francisco and he to Washington D.C. I attempted to do business with him and his partners, which unfortunately did not take off. The Colonel and Aunty Lakshmi had four kids. The eldest, Bharati, was married to “Bobby” C.V. Prithviraj, son of C.V. Chandrasekharam Naidu (a man with immense potential who could have become the Chief Minister of Andhra Pradesh, but unfortunately the odds were stacked against him). Bobby was a State Bank of India executive but gave it up for business, and now wheels and deals in real estate in Hyderabad. Bharati and Bobby have two lovely kids in “Dimpu” Ranjit, now with KPMG (married to Meredith and living in New Jersey with four beautiful kids), and Anjana (married to Sanjay relocated from the USA to Hyderabad with two very intelligent kids, one of whom is a poet in her own right). The Colonel’s second daughter, Anuradha, was married to the late K.P. Bhasker (retired from Audco India and L&T group company and settled in Chennai) and has two kids, Vignesh (married to Uttara, daughter of Ashok Prakash and Nayantara, and living in Chennai,) and Shriya married to Kiran Rao with one kid (Sameer in Dallas). 199

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BEENA’S FAMILY PATERNAL GRANDPARENTS

Draksharam Chandramouli

Puliah

Venkateshwar m Koteshwaramma 12 children

Govindamma

Ramdas

Bhasker Rao

m Annapoorna

Sharadha

Unknown Chitty Govindamma Koteshwaramma Unknown

Sudha Ammaji m Swamy Ravi m Prasanna Amulu

Anuradha

Bharati m

m K.P. Bhasker

C.V. Prithviraj D

Anjana m Sanjay Meghna

m Uttara

Anika Ranjit m

Meredith Nikhil

LEGEND S son D daughter m married

Aria

Vignesh

Shriya m Kiran Rao S Sameer

Catharine Sonia

CHANDRASHEKHARAM

KONATHAM

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MATERNAL GRANDPARENTS

Nisankara Subba Rao

Sanjeev Rao

Anvayamma

Sambasiva Rao

Swarajyalakshmi

m Vijayalakshmi

Kali

Chandu

Nagraj

NISANKARA Beena

Radhakrishna

S.G. Gopinath D

Nandhini S

Rohini

Venkat

m son of Dr. Krishnamurthy S Viraj Krish Tummala D

Rukmini m

Sneha m Adit Sunil D Dia

Sudeep Suresh

Alaina

Samara

DRAKSHARAM

Venkatraj

SATHAVALLI 201

Ranjit (Dimpu), Meredith, Cathy, Aria, Nicky and Sonia

C.V. Prithviraj (Bobby) and Bharati, Beena’s eldest sister

K.P. Bhasker and Anuradha, Beena’s second sister

Venkat Jr., Sneha, Nandini and Radhakrishna (Beena’s brother)

Naveena and Dr. Sarathy, Bhasker’s parents

202

Anjana (Bharati’s daughter), Anika, Sanjay and Meghna

Vignesh Bhasker and Uttara

Nandini with her parents, Dr. Gopalkishen and Sarala

Bhasker’s parents were well known to us—his father, Dr. Sarathy Naidu (a retired Dean of Medical Studies) and Aunty Naveena whose ‘mean’ sora puttu (shark flesh) and prawn iddiyappam were finger-licking good. K.P. Bhasker’s sister the late Padmini and her husband the late Chengal Roy and their son Deepak (now settled in Australia) were close to us. Beena, my wife, was the youngest of the girls and after her was D. Radhakrishna, the kid brother who, after a short stint in business, is now into real estate and lives in Jubilee Hills, Secunderabad. He is married to Nandini (daughter of Mrs. and Dr. Gopalkishen, a urologist and former President of the Indian Medical Society, not to forget his active participation in the formation of the Telangana State). They have two children—Venkat who now lives in Seattle working for Amazon after his MBA at Ann Arbor, and Sneha, having been trained at the London School of Fashion design, married to Adit. The Colonel had a long bout of cough in the midseventies which was wrongly diagnosed as Tuberculosis. A quack astrologer “Joshi” convinced Beena’s mother that he should not have any invasive procedure, and so he was treated orally till the cough became serious enough for further investigations. They revealed a small scar on his lung. The Colonel had to visit the USA twice to treat the ailment with chemotherapy, which was a new form of treatment then. Very unfortunately, it had spread, and one day he slipped into a coma. He remained that way for nine months. Beena’s brother Bhaiyya and her mother took great care of him. I had to return to Singapore after a month and Beena joined me three months later. The end came on the 2 May 1981. Beena went home with the kids. I have taken trouble to spell this out in order to emphasise the importance of taking care of a medical situation promptly and with pragmatism. We loved the man. He was very dear to me. I miss his suaveness and his military precision, reflected even in his handwriting. 203

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I relied on him for advice. May God bless his soul and may he rest in peace. Beena’s mother saw the marriage of Bhaiyya with Nandini. She enjoyed her grandchildren. She died on 15 December 1994 at the age of 64 as a result of a pulmonary infection.

We motored down to Wiesbaden and Rudensheim, sampled some real good Riesling wine in a vineyard in the Rhine valley and went on a day cruise of the River Rhine, visiting Niederwalddenkmal and Loreley

On our honeymoon in Frankfurt 1975 and (right) cruise down the Rhine

Brief honeymoon Beena and I left New Delhi by Air Lufthansa with a stopover at Frankfurt and New York before arriving in San Francisco. We stopped for three days and got to see Frankfurt, Beethoven’s home and more. We motored down to Wiesbaden and Rudensheim, sampled some real good Riesling wine in a vineyard in the Rhine Valley and went on a day-cruise of the River Rhine, visiting Niederwalddenkmal and Loreley. Niederwalddenkmal, in Niederwald am Rhein, is a monument built in 1870s-80s, which has great significance in Germany’s history, and it commemorates the Unification of Germany. Loreley is an immense large rock on the bank of the River Rhine at its shallowest and narrowest point, near Sankt Goarshausen. The rock is associated with the legend of Loreley. Lorelei/Loralei/Loreleyis a girl’s name which could be translated as ‘murmuring rock’ or ‘lurking rock’, but usually as ‘temptress’. She is a mythological siren who was supposed to be the daughter of Old Father Rhine. We were soon crossing the Atlantic, heading to New York from Frankfurt. On arrival we were received by my senior from Lawrence School, Lovedale Class of 1964, Dr. Paul Kanakraj, who was living in Yonkers, Upstate New York. Paul and his wife

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were very hospitable, and he was kind enough to take us around New York for the next two days, showing us The Empire State Building, the Rockefeller Building, the UN Building, the Statue of Liberty and as much of the city as we could cover in the short time. We flew across the country and arrived at San Francisco. I hoped to find my housemate Tom Whitford waiting to receive us in my car. After waiting a while, I called Tom only to find out that my car had been stolen the previous week. Well, the first chance in America to be received and to drive in my own car and impress my dear wife blew up in my face. We hailed a taxi and got home. Home was a studio apartment with access to a swimming pool and a garage which was operated by a remote switch. It was at least something with which to impress Beena.

Friends in the USA Work kept me busy and the weekend was the only time we managed to get away. We had friends in Palo Alto—Sunita (Beena’s classmate from Hyderabad) and her husband with whom we made a trip to Lake Tahoe. Other friends of Beena were Manjula and Diwakar who have settled down in Fremont now. Diwakar and Manjula were pursuing their studies at the Above: Visiting Mrs. and California, Santa Cruz. We spent a weekend visiting the Danish Village, Solvang, and Dr. Paul Kanakraj, Yonkers, the University at Santa Barbara. On another trip Beena and I went to Santa Cruz and New York State Below: At the Statue of Liberty, enjoyed the world’s oldest roller coaster, ‘The Giant Dipper’, a historic wooden roller Staten Island, New York coaster located at the Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk, an amusement park in Santa Cruz. This was built in 1924. We were seated one behind the other and not next to each other like in the new ones. I very conveniently asked Beena to sit in front, the gentleman that I am (actually it was more out of fear). I must have blasted Beena’s eardrums with my screams as I held on to her! What a relief it was when it was over. Beena was, and is always, the silent one with not even a whimper, but just a smile, enjoying the rush of wind against her face. The biggest fear was the slow crawl up to the top, and then the 205

Reminiscence

Left: Visiting Sunita in Palo Alto, CA and, right: With Manjula Diwakar at the Cachuma Lake near Solvang CA

swift fall down. I swore I would never get onto another roller coaster, a promise I think I broke only once to be a “Man” in front of the kids. We drove to Redding to meet the Knaebels and enjoyed their hospitality. They enjoyed meeting Beena. We liked having guests over for lunch or dinner, and it was a pleasure to see that Beena enjoyed serving an Indian meal to Japanese friends, Sunao and Akiko Nakane, American friends Jim and Cynthia Kovalcik and the crowd of Indian students. C. Bhasker Naidu, his wife Varalakshmigaru and their children, Anand, Asha and Ravi, lived in the Oakland Hills and were always happy to have us over for a good day out.

Our return home from the USA Giant Dipper, the oldest roller coaster in the world

Beena began to feel very homesick and, that combined with our love for our parents, prompted her to suggest that we return. My friends all advised me against it, as a return would not be easy and also it was the best time for a green card and eventual citizenship. The idea did not resonate with me and I decided that come what may, not knowing what was in store, I would 206

Weekends in California Reminiscence

Monterrey, California, 1975

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return. Beena preferred to travel rather than pickup things for the house, despite the fact that in the late seventies, imports were few in India and one had to pay a premium to buy anything “foreign”. Our personal baggage was shipped home from San Francisco and we travelled light. We charted out a trip across the USA by road (Greyhound Bus). I figure we may have travelled around 5,000 kms (3,200 miles) by bus. We packed our India bags and booked them to NY, and boarded a Greyhound to Santa Barbara, seen off by Tom Whitford, my ex-roommate. Gopi and Beena with Akiko and Sunao Nakane, Berkeley 1975

The Riviera had a live concert-cum-dinner show of the group “Fifth Dimensions” on. Dressed in jeans, sneakers and sweater, we were ushered in by a steward who seated us at a table with a good view

We stayed with Manjula and Diwakar in Santa Barbara. Our next halt was Los Angeles, a rumbling metropolis (the traffic on the expressways had a hum to it) and even in those days a city clouding the sun with ‘smog’. My classmate from UCB, Jim Partridge, received us and dropped us off at Vijayakumar’s (Palam Raju’s cousin) home at the USC (he was a PhD. student at that time). Vijay was kind enough to drive us around on must-see trips to Universal Studios, Sea World and Disneyworld, as well as to downtown LA. Our next halt was Las Vegas. On arrival and a wash after depositing our luggage in a locker, we ventured out to have fun and try our luck at the casinos. The lights were beginning to come on and very shortly the streets and buildings were all lit up, and the music started blaring, with attendants hailing visitors to their den. The Riviera had a live concert-cum-dinner show of the group “Fifth Dimensions” on. Dressed in jeans, sneakers and sweater, we were ushered in by a steward who seated us at a table with a good view. We enjoyed the dinner and the music, and favourite numbers, “Let the Sunshine In” and “The Age of Aquarius”. We reluctantly headed back to the bus station to catch our night bus to the Grand Canyon via Flagstaff. I recall driving over the Hoover Dam, a concrete arch-gravity dam in the Black Canyon of the Colorado River, on the border between Nevada and Arizona. We got into the Grand Canyon early in the morning. After seeing all the sights, including a beautiful sunset, we boarded an evening bus to Colorado Springs. We met a very interesting New Zealander on the bus, and we all stayed in the same motel on reaching our destination. We shared the cost of the hired car and went around 208

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Colorado Springs together, seeing the Air Force station from a distance, visiting the Garden of the Gods, Pikes Peak and the Will Rogers Memorial—Shrine of the Sun— in the Cheyenne Mountains. We then headed north to Denver (an hour-and-a-half away). We drove around downtown, had lunch and caught an evening bus to Chicago, the home of gangster Al Capone about whom we had read. This was the longest drive without a break, a distance of 675 miles, reaching in the evening. The next day we drove around Chicago in the Greyhound tour bus, captivated by the Windy City by Lake Michigan. We were taken for a drive around the lake, a visit to the tallest building in those days—the Sears Tower—and to the Hancock Building. We had two days here, and we were on the move again to Buffalo. After refreshing ourselves we headed out on a two-hour drive to see the Niagara Falls both from the USA side and the Canadian side (surprisingly we did not need a visa to cross into Canada). We visited Toronto and headed back to Buffalo the same evening. We were excited to reach our next destination, Boston, where we would get a much-needed respite from all the travel.

Visiting the Grand Canyon after a night at Las Vegas, Nevada 209

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We stayed with the Lupis (parents of Cynthia Kovalcik, Berkeley) who were fabulous hosts and treated us to the legendary Italian hospitality. Cynthia’s brother Toni drove us around to see Concorde, the Paul Revere Freedom Trail, the site of the Boston Tea Party, MIT, Harvard University and some museums. We were told not to leave Boston without eating New England clam chowder, which we religiously did and enjoyed to our waist’s content. Our next destination was Pittsburgh. We stayed with Rohini and Harsha Reddy. We visited the Pittsburgh Venkateshwara Temple which was in the making. There was not much to do in the Steel City other than visiting friends. In Washington D.C. we were received by Col. Sanjeev Rao’s personal friend, A.P. Venkateshwaran, the then First Secretary at the Indian High Commission. Little did I realise what a giant of a personality I was visiting and whose hospitality we were going to enjoy.

Dr. A.P. Venkateshwaran, our host in Washington DC

Uncle Venkateshwaran and Usha Aunty were great hosts. Having ascertained that I held a valid US Driving License, Uncle gave me his car—a Ford Pony—filled with gas, and a whole host of maps, saying, “Washington D.C. is yours.” With Beena as navigator, we had fun driving around the city. You name it and we saw it—the Smithsonian, the Lincoln Monument, the Capitol Building, the White House, the Jefferson Memorial, the National Mall, the Washington Monument and the Arlington Cemetery. We took a drive along the Potomac River and to Vermont. One evening Uncle and Aunty took us to a sitar recital by Pandit Ravi Shankar at the JFK Centre of Performing Arts. On another evening, at the same venue, we saw Satyajit Ray’s masterpiece Sonar Kella. Our stay in in this historical city with such wonderful hosts was the cherry on the cake. Our final bus journey was to New York. Shopping was on our To-Do list. We also visited Beena’s classmate Rajamani in New Jersey. We managed to cobble up some change for two headsets and drinks on the flight, having spent all our dollars on our trip. We finally arrived in India and, after a short stay in New Delhi, we headed for Jabalpur where my father was posted. My USA Chapter ended with memories that have lasted a lifetime.

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CHAPTER

11 My Career – Life as a Civil Engineer

I I had just graduated from Berkeley with an MS in Construction Management in June, 1974. With a little bit of luck, I managed to get a job with International Engineering Company (IECO), a subsidiary of Morrison Knudsen, Boise, Idaho

had a dream run as a civil engineer in varied projects and in different parts of the world, gaining rich experience with each job I held. My experience included general management, project management, construction execution, cost management, contractual claims, contract negotiation, administration and management, contract coordination, planning and budgeting, cost control, joint venture agreements for marine structures, buildings and industrial structures, petrochemical constructions, and heavy civil constructions, including marketing of construction and environmental services. I became a member of the Indian Institute of Engineers and a Fellow of the American Society of Civil Engineers. I registered as a Consultant with The World Bank, Washington, D.C. (Ref. No. C 5144) but never landed any assignment, the cause being not knowing the ropes. Nevertheless, I enjoyed executing some great projects: Fabrication of Offshore Structures, Industrial Structures, Multi-storey Residential and Commercial buildings (hotels, roads, bridges, hospitals, and Mass Rapid Transit). I worked in the United States of America, India, Singapore, Maldives, Oman, Indonesia and Malaysia.

San Francisco: 1974-1976 My first job was in San Francisco. I had just graduated from Berkeley with an MS in Construction Management in June, 1974. With a little bit of luck, I managed to get a job with International Engineering Company (IECO), a subsidiary of Morrison Knudsen, Boise, Idaho. The office was located in the Mills Building on Montgomery Street, which survived the 1906 “Big One”. I enjoyed wearing a three-piece suit to work and it gave me great delight to walk in to the building, nodding a “Good Morning” or greeting a pretty smile that could never escape my attention. My assignment was a Project Coordination Engineer reporting to the Coordination Manager, “Chuck” Charles Adam. (Chuck had Irish and American Indian blood in him.) The project was a US$350 million Samarco Pelletizing Project and Ocean Terminal at Ponta Ubu in Brazil. It was being built through a joint venture of Marcona International and Samitri with the Project Management and Engineering being done by IECO and 211

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Dravo, Pittsburgh (Pelletizing Plant Technology). My mentors were George Barlow, Sarkaria, and Marc Caspe. My immediate boss was Chuck and the Project Manager was J.J. Burke. They made a great team to work with and, considering it was my first job, I certainly got exposure to working in a joint venture environment. Come Friday evening, Chuck would take me for a drink to the ‘Stage Coach’ on Montgomery Street. The deal was he would pay for my drinks until I was confirmed, which happened in less than a month. We went Dutch thereafter. I started with dry martinis with olives and found myself staggering home on the BART from San Francisco to Berkeley. Weekends were often spent helping him and his family hammer nails on an 80-footer yatch parked at the Oakland waterfront. He refurbished the boat and one day set sail across the Bay out of the Golden Gate Bridge, when engine trouble made the Coast Guard haul him in (this was I understand sometime in 1979, long after I had left the USA).

Above: An extract from the IECO Newsletter Below: Tea with the Mousleys, Marin County, California

We had some wonderful secretaries, the mother of all being Beth Free. She was about 60. We had gorgeous looking gals as well—Amelia (a Panamian), Tina and her Brazilian colleague Lucia (both of whom you couldn’t resist whistling at) and my favourite, Julie (a vivacious blonde who lived across the Bay in Tiburon). Americans were wonderful people to be with and to work with. They start by trusting individuals. I was so glad that my first job was with them, as I was later on in life able to set a benchmark for gauging colleagues and bosses. I had a lot of time for Chuck. I was deeply touched when other than the team send off, my bosses at IECO, George and Marc (my mentors) took me out to lunch when I confirmed my intention to return to India. Others I recall are Michele Montesclaros, Ian Mousley, Amit Sen, Ravi Kumra, Tim McNichols (He took over my job when I left, and now lives with Linda in Phoenix, Arizona, and I am still in touch with him). He took Beena and me out to the Playboy Club for cocktails, and boy did I see some “tails”! Amelia drove me down to Julie’s wedding in her swank car (Lincoln Mercury—a $7000 car for a secretary?). Julie got married to a huge 6-footer of Greek origin. When Beena and I got married, they passed around a collection box and told us that we could buy the wedding gift of our choice. What a great 212

My Career – Life as a Civil Engineer

idea, I thought, after having come here after our wedding in India where most of the gifts were in triplicates or more.

Madras – 1976-1980: Rohini and Rukmini On my return to Madras from Jabalpur, I set up a construction company, Sabeena Constructions, and started taking up contracts. My first contract was with the Military Engineering Services. It was the construction of garages for Military Transport (MT) Section. Despite support of our friend Mr. Seshan of Anuradha Constructions, I had a torrid time handling vendors, lower tier subcontractors and having to do strict supervision. The job was successfully completed and handed over. I made a decision to stop private contracting and chose an easier route by seeking a job. I should have turned to historical wisdom—learn from failures and rise from the ashes. Our first child, our daughter Rohini, was born on July 23, 1976 in Hyderabad, since tradition dictated that our first child be born in Beena’s parents’ home. We had made our home in Alwarpet. My worksite was in Tambaram and I used my Lambretta occasionally for the long drive. Half way into the contract I got myself a brandnew Fiat Padmini car (TMW 3636). Very soon it doubled as a pickup truck for transporting materials. Rohini, our eldest, July 23, 1976

We led a simple life and brought up our daughter with all the comforts we could afford. We did not stint from going to movies or eating out. Visiting the Taj Coromandel on weekends was great, with live music and dance. We went to the Gymkhana Club and enjoyed the open-air live music and dance by the pool. As Petula Clark said in her beautiful song, ‘those were the days’. My father-in-law was a regular visitor to Madras, to see his daughters. A lot of time was spent taking the Colonel for his health checks. He would never stay with either of his daughters—following a North Indian tradition he had imbibed whilst in the Army. I think the idea was that one should not impose on the families of married daughters, out of respect. Rohini was left with family elders when we partied or went to movies. My Aunt Usha’s mother (“Mummy”) was always very willing to help. We took Rohini with us to Woodland’s drive-in (Woody’s), which became a weekend breakfast place. It had a little playground and a pony to keep Rohini busy. The Marina Beach was another great place to take her. I worked in the Maldives, doing the spadework and mobilising two hotel sites. Maldives was a real holiday. Each day I would take a ‘Dhoni’, a local dhow, to ferry me to the sites. We required an early start and an early return to avoid the currents in the channel. 213

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Rohini

I enjoyed swimming in its clear waters and watching the colourful fishes and all the colourful people enjoying the white coral sand beaches. I once had a foreman stay overnight to collect crayfish and lobsters, which I used as a public relations tool with the local High Commissioner, the Indian Airlines Station Manager and AAI management who were building the Hulule Airport. After six months, my employer gave me a raw deal on my contract terms, and I decided to return to Madras. My second daughter, Rukmini was born in Hyderabad on 30 November 1978. My father retired in March 1981 and moved into Alwarpet. Our pet black Labrador Bruno could not get along with Gina and GBoy, who became part of the household when Dad retired to share the home we had been 214

My Career – Life as a Civil Engineer

Rukmini our second, November 30, 1978

occupying. The trouble began with the advent of the two Pomeranians. Bruno was relegated to the garage on his own. He passed away on my return from the Maldives, a premature death. It became apparent that we had to move. My father spoke to me in his straightforward way and said that I should be looking for my own space, since I had my own family with two children. Boy, did it hurt to move out of my family home, but I guess it made a man of me. I decided to rent a place on the same street so that my family and I could be near my parents if they needed us. It worked well. We met on Sundays for Bada Khana, an elaborate meal as the name implies, which my mother prepared and a bottle of gin was polished off between father and son. I looked forward for these meetings with Dad and Mom.

The children with ‘Pedamma’ —Beena’s maternal aunt 215

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Mahjulah Singapura;1980-1995: Venkat The stirring melody and lyrics that echo the enduring hope and spirit of Singaporeans for progress, the National Anthem, Majulah Singapura (meaning Onward Singapore), is a musical expression of Singapore’s identity as a nation. I was also a part of this progress from 1980-2004, but with a few gaps between assignments.

I cannot remain silent about how I felt on many occasions during my time here, which I never felt whilst working in the USA

I was interviewed at the Taj Coromandel Hotel, Madras, by Mr. Lim Cheng Pah, the Personnel Director of the Sembawang Shipyard group in Singapore, and the appointment as a Project Engineer was signed by Mr. Lai Saw Chong, the Asst. General Manager. Mr. Lim Cheng Pah was fascinated by that fact that my MS degree had been signed by Mr. Ronald Reagan. On arrival in Singapore, I was received by an Asst. Personnel Officer and driven to the yard in a Mercedes Benz, and met in the Shipyard Restaurant by Mr. Govindan, the Personnel Manager. I was treated to a lavish Scotch and steak dinner and I was mighty impressed by everything thus far. The shock came when I was shown to my accommodation for the night. The less said in print the better. The next day came the bigger shock. After being introduced to Mr. Newman, the General Manager, and told about the management and paperwork, I was given a hardhat and an overall, and a bicycle to get around the yard. After having driven my own, brand new car in Madras, a bicycle took some getting used to. During my stint in the Far East I worked in various capacities on large projects valued US$40 million to US$300 million and driven by penalty clauses, principally engaged as a Contracts Manager on large oil and gas projects administrating contracts of lower tier vendors and clients such as Saipem (Bougyes Offshore), Conoco, Exxon and North Rankine Fields. Projects were located in Singapore, Malaysia and Indonesia. I excelled in negotiations on a win-win basis on million dollar claims. I worked in joint ventures with Brown & Root, Houston, USA, and was involved in bid preparations and prequalification exercises and contract management of projects like the Conoco Belida Project (US$350 million).

My first project was a Brunei Shell Petroleum project consisting of constructing living accommodation on a 90-man barge, and a crane tub collar at a total cost of S$3 million. The company took the risk of presenting me as Installation of Mendu helideck with the seahorse crane, Sembawang the Project Head, though I had been with them only two Shipyard, 1980 216

My Career – Life as a Civil Engineer

weeks. I dived into the deep end and it was a matter of survival. “Never Give In” came in handy and I took on my responsibilities head-on. I lost 25 kgs cycling back and forth. The barge set sail on time despite issues that arose overnight, saving the company some S$30million per day in liquidated damages. This project completion won me accolades and a raise. The next project was the Woodside Petroleum Project consisting of 7 modules. I was in charge of the Power Generation and Mud storage. The project had a great ending and a flawless load out on the dockside. Projects make friends. I made some great friends with whom I still keep in touch. My Resident Engineer, Tom Van Leenen; the Facilities Manager, Dave Wakefield (He and his wife Ann visited Rohini in London when Viraj was born, and Beena spent a couple of days with them in Petercoulter near Aberdeen in Scotland); and the late Mr. Premraj and his family. Dave and Tom never liked my guts, especially in the negotiation of changes. Tom felt I was a better contracts manager than a site in-charge, and that is what I eventually became on other major projects. Sembawang Engineering, Singapore, 1982

I cannot remain silent about how I felt on many occasions during my time here, which I never felt whilst working in the USA. The distinct disparity in the perks, quality of housing, and salaries amongst the various nationalities was evident. Despite a Master’s and work experience in the USA, I felt short-changed. I worked hard, 12-14 hours to meet project schedules. I questioned for the first time whether a man was born with a silver spoon or with a wooden ladle depended on his race and colour. My close friend, who was British, said, “Well, Gopi, take it or leave it. Stop griping. You cannot change the system.” I decided that I would return to India the day my Employment Pass was blocked. But it didn’t happen. The management of Sembawang was keen that I apply for permanent residence and become a Singapore National. I did remain in Singapore for 24 years, though intermittently in the latter half, but on my own terms as an Indian National.

EPMI, Sime-Sembawang, Johor Malaysia, 1989

15 August 1983. I was with Govind and Krishna Raj (part of the Coolie Klub) at a dinner with our Construction Manager. John Horsburgh (a Geordie), was chatting with us when around 11 pm Dad called. 217

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SEPL Woodside construction team, 1982

Dave and Ann Wakefield, Scotland, 2007

Client Resident Engineer Tom van Leenen and Site Engineer Dave Wakefield, 1981; (right) With the Premrajs

218 Woodside client team, 1981; (right) Gopi with Irene, Sim H.H. and Aloysisus Tan (ERHA team), Singapore 2005

Reminiscence

Conoco Belida project, Jakarta, Indonesia, 1994

Tessa Lee Geok, my insurance agent in Singapore

Entrance to the Orchard MRT Station, 1987

Interior of the Orchard MRT Station

219 Chew, Tang and Gopi in Paris to meet Dragages, 1982

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Beena had delivered a baby boy! The Colonel’s recipe worked. He said that after the second child, a gap of four years and bearing the expenses of the delivery ourselves would result in our being blessed with a boy. We named our son Venkatraj.

Above:“Butch” Venkat with his Dad Below: John Horsburgh, SEPL Construction Manager

I turned down a posting to start a yard at Pasir Gudang in Johore, in Malaysia, as the Personnel Department did not know the terms of reference. I was a part of the Sembawang group’s strategy to diversify into a civil construction company. This was exciting. I got to travel to Hong Kong, Korea and Japan to meet large construction companies and government authorities in the formation of joint ventures and execution of the Mass Rapid Transit systems. I got nominated as a part of a delegation to meet our joint venture partners ‘Dragages et Travuax Publics’ in Paris. We were successful in obtaining the Newton station contract (S$40 million). During the execution phase, I was sent to Hong Kong by the Dragages Sembawang project on a technology transfer mission to the Dragages site at the Hong Kong and Shanghai Bank 220

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SCAL trip to Seoul, South Korea, 1982

Newton Station, top down construction, Singapore 1983

Transfer of Technology: 35th floor of Hong Kong & Shanghai Bank, Hong Kong, 1983

Seconded to the joint-venture are Mr. Lawrence Liaw and Mr. S.G. Gopinath. Mr. Gopinath, in a senior position in the Technical Department will be responsible for all technical matters.

SCAL trip to Tokyo to meet Mr. Katsuya Kukurai (r) 221 of Kumagai Gumi Construction Ltd., 1982

Reminiscence

Gopi and Beena with Ian and Odile in Paris, 2018 Right: Alain and Claire Deniau with Beena and Gopi in Pondicherry, 2018

(HKSB) in Hong Kong. I recall going up by the material lift to the 35th floor, and the height and wind nearly overwhelmed me. People I worked with were Alan Tan, Tang, Ian Dewsbury (still in touch), Francois Millet, Olivier Hoeffner (I met him in Paris 2011), Alain Deniau and Claire (we still meet) and Sim Geok Peng. With all this happening, I was trying to improve my housing and the schooling for the children. My children I sent back to be with my parents and Beena was already in India, having gone back for Venkat’s birth. I tried to be happy with my job for another year in the construction of the Newton Station, and one fine day, when Mr. Lai Park Oon, the Personnel Director offered me accommodation on a 60:40 (40 being for me) basis, I turned it down and decided to return to India. Again, it was not to be. I did go back to India, but just for a holiday.

Memorable are Mandarin Hotel’s Hainanese Chicken Rice, seafood at Long Beach, Chilly Crab and buns at East Coast Jumbo’s

The neighbouring station—Orchard—was being built by another French-Italian JV company, who were on the lookout for a Contracts Manager. In 1987 I joined Bocotra on my return from India. The terms were close to that of a ‘Foreign Expatriate’, a handsome salary, a good condominium to live in with gas and electricity paid for, international school education (Rohini at UWC, Rukmini at Tanglin and Venkat at Winchester Nursery school), a car and fuel to boot, and once a year travel for the family and myself to India and back. We built Orchard, Somerset and Tiong Bahru stations. These were our best years in Singapore. As a Contracts Manager with M/S Bocotra (joint venture of Borie-Sae, France) and M/S Dragages et Travaux Publics, France, on large stations/tunnels for the first phase of the Singapore Mass Rapid Transit, I managed three stations simultaneously— Orchard, Somerset and Tiong Bahru. The works involved heavy civil engineering, buildings, and finishing works for stations and tunnels. Hard work was rewarding. Mr. Michel Pinaud and Mr Patrick de Labrusse were the bosses. I would fail in my duty 222

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Above: MRT team with Gopi (2nd from left), Peter Howell (5th from left) and Loke Pak Chee (4th from right) and David Wright (3rd from right) Below: Newton Circus which served the amazing Chilly Crab and Hainanese Chicken Rice

not to acknowledge my mentor, David Wright, the claims consultant with whom I worked closely, and Peter Howell, another colleague whom I worked alongside. I developed excellent interpersonal skills to work in a multicultural environment and was part of a team that successfully obtained a S$313-million road and tunnel expressway (Central Expressway Phase I from Cairn Hill to Ang Mo Kio) contract with the PWD department. After six years with Bocotra, when local partners took umbrage at why an Indian was being given this deal, the company wanted to ‘localise’ me; I chose to return to India with the family. Singapore in those days had high end shopping malls, luxury hotels and excellent food, in my opinion, the best food in the world. Memorable are Mandarin Hotel’s Hainanese Chicken Rice, seafood at Long Beach, Chilly Crab and Buns at East Coast Jumbo’s and the famous Curry Puffs (Old Chang Kee), the outstanding Seafood Fried Rice and BBQ Sambal Stingray from Newton Circus… and the list goes on. Desserts were fresh fruits which Singapore imported in abundance year round from all over the world (our family stayed away from the famous durians). The hawker stalls were a favourite haunt, and their coffee and tea made with condensed milk was enough to see a diabetic get a gangrenous foot. The Chinese coffee shops for breakfast were also very interesting with their soft-boiled eggs (laced with soya sauce), Yocharkueh (dough fritters) and Buttered Toast (Kaya), and Kopio (Killiney Kopitiam was my favourite). Public transport in the

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form of buses, MRT, and cabs with English-speaking drivers made any foreigner feel at home. My parents and my family visited all the Singapore attractions—Raffles Hotel (we had the Singapore Sling at the Long Bar). I initially had a company provided 626 Mazda which was upgraded to a 929 Mazda. With mobility, although it was a tight squeeze, we visited many places in Malaysia and a few favourites were Penang, Malacca, Bali, KL, Kuantan, Genting Highlands and Desaru. On one of his visits in 1987, Dad suffered a heart attack, and we were lucky to know Dr. V.K. Pillai of Mount Elizabeth Hospital, who advised us to take him to National University (NUS) Hospital. He even arranged the ambulance. My father would have been a goner if we had not tapped into the right resource. My foreman at work, Lim Peng Chuan, helped me carry Dad onto the stretcher. A temporary pacemaker was put in and, amazingly, the next day Dad looked like nothing had happened. The doctor insisted on open heart surgery and refused to allow Dad to travel back to India. Dad being a tough cookie had his way and returned to India. That is when I met Fatima (Air India) and Sam, and our friendship remains strong, (with children’s weddings being attended on both sides). Mom and Dad eventually travelled to Houston and Dad had a by-pass done by Dr. Denton Cooley and Dr. Mathur. In 1989 my employment contract with Bocotra ended and I set up a private consultancy. This was a brief stint; I was offered another job by Sembawang, which I accepted, and I remained with them for the rest of my stay in Singapore. We were closely connected with many Indian families and others who worked at Sembawang.

Above: With Lorena and Lim Peng Chuan, Singapore Below: Sam, Fatima, Judith and Joel

When I was with the Sembawang–Brown and Root (USA) joint venture (Gema SemBrown) in Jakarta, I booked tickets for the family to come to Jakarta (1993), Sydney, Melbourne, Singapore and Chennai. Whilst I sent the family out on tours during the working hours, together we enjoyed the evenings with friends—Inder Singh, Sam MacDonald, Bob Weirich, Chris Braithwaite, Morris, Tony Anderson, Kevin Mobbs, Sandra, John and Susan Hunter Thomson, Charlie Reeves, Peter MacCallum, Trevor Copeland, David Findlay, and others. Jakarta had a lot to offer. Menteng (the 224

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Left: Solomon, Subbu & Pramila’s kids with Rohini and Rukmini; Right: Visiting Prathaban and Swapna, Singapore 2015

Left: Sulochana, Subbiah Naidu with Ranga. Right: Nila carrying Venkat, Wai Toe with their daughters Wai Wai and Su Su

Left: The Koolie Club Ladies, Sembawang, Singapore. Right: Morris Wire and Gopi, Jakarta, 1994

Left: The Koolie Men’s Club, (l to r) Patel, Bhasker, Govind, Gopi, Krishnaraj and Fernandez, Sembawang, Singapore 225 Right: Our neighbours in Cochrane, the Chatterjeas

Reminiscence

Clockwise from top left: Celebrating the signing of a contract with Nippon Steel (Bob Weirich and Chris Braithwaite in the front row) at a Japanese 226 lunch; Beena and Kevin Mobbs; Lunch with the Weirichs, Sam and the Conoco Team; Cathy and Sam McDonald with their kids

My Career – Life as a Civil Engineer

area was great for shopping), Merdeka Square, the Monas Tower, Ragunan Zoo (we posed with tigers, pythons and orangutans), Museums, Dunia Fantasi, Glodok (Chinatown), malls and restaurants. We drove down to our worksite in Anyer, West Java. The food was excellent, especially the fresh fish which was marinated and grilled in pandan leaf over a charcoal fire and their fried rice with the special sambal. I was the only Sembawang representative in the Project Team. I literally played ball to stay relevant, well accepted and respected.

The family with Subbu,Valli and kids, at a theme park in Jakarta, 1993

Whilst driving west to the site we got to see Anak Krakatau volcano (Child of Krakatoa), which emerged as an island in the caldera after the eruption of Krakatoa in 1883. (Calderas are formed by the inward collapse of a volcano. Craters are usually more circular than calderas.) The history of Mt. Krakatoa (Krakatau in Indonesian) is fascinating, and best explained in an article by Mary Bagley.

The History of Mt. Krakatoa The eruption of Krakatoa, or Krakatau, in August 1883 was one of the most deadly volcanic eruptions of modern history. It is estimated that more than 36,000 people died. Many died as a result of thermal injury from the blasts and many more were victims of the tsunamis that followed the collapse of the volcano into the caldera below sea level. The eruption also affected the climate and caused temperatures to drop all over the world. The island of Krakatau is in the Sunda Strait between Java and Sumatra. It is part of the Indonesian Island Arc... The explosions hurled an estimated 11 cubic miles (45 cubic km) of debris into the atmosphere, darkening skies up to 275 miles from the volcano. In the immediate vicinity, the dawn did not return for three days. Ash fell as far away as 3,775 miles, landing on ships to the northwest. Barographs around the globe documented that the shock waves in the atmosphere circled the planet at least seven times. Within 13 days, a layer of sulphur dioxide and other gases began to filter the amount of sunlight able to reach Earth. The atmospheric effects made for spectacular sunsets all over Europe and the United States. Average global temperatures were as much as 1.2 degrees cooler for the next five years... Mary Bagley; Krakatoa Volcano: Facts About 1883 Eruption; Live Science Contributor

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We drove down to Bali visiting many places en route: Semerang, Yogyakarta (Dutch era colony, Prambanan Temple, the 18th Century Royal Palace, Surabaya (lunch stop), Mount Bromo, Borobudur (we witnessed a fabulous sunset amongst the stupas), Ubud and Bali (Nusa Dua and Kuta and other places of interest), Puncak (tea estates), and Bandung (Cimahi waterfalls). We arrived in Sydney and were received by Wai Toe, our Burmese friend from our days in Sembawang. It was an absolute delight to see that they had realised their promised land. They had a beautiful home with three cars parked in front, on a one-acre plot on two levels. Wild cockatoos

Above: Borobudur Indonesia 1993 Below left: Darling Harbour cruise, Sydney Below right: Venkat water skiing on the Hawkesbury River, NSW Australia

were flying around and I fully expected to see a kangaroo hopping on their lawn. Nila was a gracious hostess along with her two daughters Wai Wai and Su Su. Each day we were dropped at Paramatta Station and we found our way into town. There was plenty of walking, a cruise around Sydney Harbour and a visit to the Opera House, a trip to Sea Life Aquarium, a visit to Queen Victoria Building, Sydney Harbour Bridge, and Sydney Tower Skywalk. My Housemaster from Lawrence School, Mr Hariharan, and Mrs. Hariharan had settled in a suburb of Sydney. We and our local hosts were invited to have dinner at their home in Castle Hill, New South Wales. It was a lovely evening spent reminiscing about life at Lovedale. The next day “Hari” Mr. Hariharan drove us to the Blue 228

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Mountains and also see the ‘Three Sisters’, altogether a beautiful day out. (I had the opportunity of celebrating Mr. Hariharan’s birthday along with the Chennai OLs at the Madras Gymkhana Club some years down the line.) Our host took us out for a night drive in Sydney and we stepped out at Kings Cross, the red-light district, with its many strip joints, bars and restaurants. We settled down in one of them over a drink while we absorbed a small slice of local culture. I also had the wonderful opportunity of catching up with my housemate from Lovedale, Roy Brown, Mrs. Brown and Colin, in Sydney. My Australian friend, Tony Sonneveld, invited us over for lunch the next day and had a surprise in store for us.

Above: Trip to the ‘Three Sisters’ Katoomba, Blue Mountains, courtesy Mr. Hariharan Above right: BBQ with Tony, NSW, AU Below: At Sea World, Gold Coast, NSW, 1993

We went water skiing in the Hawkesbury River and a BBQ thereafter with plenty of Foster’s. It appears Ruku did pretty well to get out of the water and Venkat was a shade behind. Not too bad for beginners. The water was too cold for Rohini and me, and Beena has a morbid fear of water. Nila came along with us. The next day saw us heading out to Coolangatta, the airport for Surfers’ Paradise. This was the most enjoyable part of the trip. We stayed in a serviced apartment and headed out each day in cabs. Sea World, Dream World, Warner Bros Movie World, Wet n’ Wild and the 229

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beach had the kids screaming in delight, especially in the theme parks. We hired a car and drove up to Mount Tambourine to watch one of the best sunsets in my life. Mount Tambourine, like Fraser Hill in Malaysia and Matheran in Maharashtra, is a quaint retirement village. We flew to Sydney and onward to Melbourne. The only regret of our trip was not going to Cairns (the Great Barrier Reef ) and Perth (to see friends).

Above: Radhika, Ramanna, Siddarath and Karthik, Melbourne, 1993 Below: Rajeeka, Michael Horsburgh and kids, Holiday Inn Park View, Singapore, 1993

At Melbourne we were to be the guests of Beena’s old college classmate, Radhika neé Yadati (left LSL in 1969) and her husband Ramanna (Dad’s senior, Col. Sunderaj’s nephew) and their two boys —Siddharath (a bright young mind in research who went to Harvard for his post-doctoral work and now settled in the USA) and Karthik (now an Information Technology techie). Radhika’s father Govindu was a good friend of the Colonel. Radhika’s siblings went to Lawrence School— Dr. Pramod Yadati (1974) and Dr. Praveena (1974), both settled in the USA. Radhika and Ramanna took seven days off to take us around Melbourne in a hired a ten-seater van so that both families could travel together. We got to see quite a bit including having BBQs en route on the Great Ocean Road to Phillip’s Island to see the little penguins returning ashore, known as the ‘Penguin Parade’. We were illequipped by way of warm gear and I got a chest cold that took six months to get rid of. We made a day trip to Ballarat (a one-and-a-half-hour journey of 120 km from Melbourne), and a visit to the Sovereign Hill (a living museum of a gold mining town) which was very informative about the ways the early settlers (‘convicts’) had made their homes. We saw the usual places of interest in Melbourne, such as St. Paul’s Cathedral, Parliament House, Queen Victoria Market, National Gallery of Victoria, and Captain Cook’s Cottage. I recall the price of a ‘Prata’ we had at a fancy Malaysian restaurant, which my host paid for at A$6.00 each (probably worth 30 cents). No visit is worthwhile if we don’t get to meet the people there. We met Ramanna’s brother’s family, Dr. Janardhan Rao (Dad’s friend and local Indian Consular Officer) and had 230

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dinner with my Engineering classmate, Bharath Krishnaswamy. On our return we stayed at the Holiday Inn Park View run by an OL, Michael Horsburgh (LSL 1968 Nilgiri House), who was its General Manager. We met his wife Rajeeka Dev, another OL. Beena and the children flew back to Chennai and I flew back to Jakarta.

Mr. and Mrs. Jeremy Waddingham, Tanglin Club, Singapore

I returned to Singapore to work for the remainder of the contract period and to abide by the 180day Income Tax Rule for an NRI. At the request of Mr. Premraj, the Executive Director of SMOE, I was in Jeremy Waddington’s team in a massive joint venture consisting of Bechtel, Sembawang and the Lippo Group for the Meizhouwan Power Plant in Fujian, China. It involved travel to Hong Kong, Thailand and San Francisco. It was an exciting project and I was involved in the power sharing agreement and the joint venture agreements for construction between Bechtel and Sembawang. During a trip our team made to San Francisco, they chose one of us in turns to select eating places in the evening. My Singaporean colleagues were quite happy with the Chinatown fare. With the experience of the past, I selected Top of the Mark (a revolving restaurant) for cocktails, where we got a beautiful view of the Bay and the Pacific Ocean. Thereafter we walked down to the Bank of America building and went up to the Carnilian Room on the 52nd floor for dinner. For the five of us from Singapore, it was a pricey affair, and Jeremy refused to allow me to select eating places during our one-month stay. We stayed at the Hyatt at Embarcadero, as it was close to the Bechtel office. We had no time at all for sightseeing; it was work, work, work.

Chennai: 1995-2002 On my return from Singapore, I worked with MacCivil from 1995 to 1997 as a General Manager reporting to the Managing Director, P.G. Ramakrishnan (PGR). PGR was a repository of technical information, having worked as a Senior General Manager with ECC (Larsen and Toubro group). His forte was soils and foundation works. I moved to Mahindra’s in 1997 and worked with them for 5 years until 2002. As General Manager of the Buildings Division, I worked with K.V. Nair, the Managing Director (a former Senior General Manager with ECC). Together we built an organisation 231

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of over 100 engineers. Notable among the projects was the Tanna Residency (32 stories) and Mahindra Heights at Tardeo (26 stories) and the United World College in Pune. I was involved in business development and reported directly to the Managing Director. There were plenty of trips to Pune, Nagpur, Hyderabad and Mumbai. My parents would relive the old NDA days, eating Shrewsbury biscuits from the Kayani Bakery, or Bakarvadis, Lonavala chikis and the Laskshminarayan chewda, which I brought back from each trip to Pune. Above: MacCivil with Mr. P.G. Ramakrishnan, Chennai 1995 Above right: Inauguration of MUWC, Pune (l to r) Amar Deshpande, Gopi, Mrs. Wilkinson, K.V. Nair and Pradeep Shintre, 1999 Below: Aerial view of MUWC campus, Pune

The Sembawang Group and I seemed to be drawn together once again. Over the next decade, I worked two more stints with them. For the first of these I was back in Singapore, from 2002 to 2005, with Sembawang Marine Offshore, and then from 2005 to 2006 with Sembawang Corporation Environmental Services as Country Director stationed in Chennai. I worked briefly (2006–2007) for FFE Minerals India Pvt. Ltd., Chennai (a fully owned subsidiary of F.L. Schmidt, a Danish company) as a Senior General Manager on Industrial projects related to the cement and power industry. My work involved travelling around India and also to the copper belt in Zambia (Chingola). FFE had one of the best HR policies I had ever seen in my career. My last assignment was as the President of the Property Division of the Empee Group. I supported the Hotel Division led by Suresh Madhok, in setting up the project team. 232

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The Hilton Hotel (210 rooms) in Chennai as President (Projects) was my final project as a professional, and boy, did we have to sweat.

Above: The Hilton Hotel along with the team Below: To visit Christopher Benninger, Ram with Dr. Salim Thomas, at the India House, Pune, 2018

The ease of doing projects overseas was in stark contrast to working in India—in India the funding to lower tier contractors required us to drive the project based on the funds of the subcontractors. Delayed payments, labour problems, and deliveries were all tough issues, the control of which was at the mercy of payments. Enforcement of a contract was much easier overseas. In India, Planning, Control and Monitoring were buzzwords which were not matched with intent. I realised that I could not work in India. In 2011, I retired from ful-time work as a civil engineer; the time had come for me to put my energy into other kinds of work and interests. Management of home and property, finances and taxes, tenants, for my mother and ourselves has kept me busy in retirement. Thanks to the guidance of my father I was not rudely shocked. He would engage me in the writing of draft agreements, handling the tenants, banking, and meeting auditors. The payment of property taxes and water taxes needed constant vigilance. I have set aside three acres of the land bequeathed to me by my father to start a school in honour of Venkat. A lot of initial work has been done and requires further work and capital and the application of wisdom in getting the right partnership. I have engaged the services of Christopher Benninger for the architecture of the school and M/s Palaniappan, a Chennai based project architect, and started initial discussions with Dr. Salim Thomas. 233

Fun times with Venkat and the family Reminiscence

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With the present pandemic, the concept of social distancing is going to affect the school design and we have chosen to put it on hold until the scenario changes for the better. Dr. Salim Thomas (OL, 1963, ARA) is our family physician and we consult with him on all major issues, be they medical or non-medical. We are indebted to him and his charming wife Omena, who have had a profound impact on our family and friends. Dr. Jayachandran of Trinity hospital is our cardiologist, and the two doctors in our family—Dr. Sai and Dr. Lata —guide and support us.

Holidays

We made some lovely trips to Munnar and Kodaikanal, and stayed at the Sterling Lake View and Sterling Valley View and, after a transfer of loyalties, at the Mahindra Resorts at Kodaikanal and Munnar

Bangalore, Hyderabad, Tirupathi and Koduru were on the regular radar. On another occasion we took Dad’s car, an Ambassador, from Chennai with our driver, Rajan, and drove to Trichy, Salem, Coimbatore and Ooty with the intention of retracing my footprints of the past. I managed to show my family the whole of Lawrence School. The children were young then. I do think Venkat was convinced that a session at boarding school was good. Rajan very unfortunately passed away young, leaving two kids. His wife Poomaille helped my mother for over 30 years and finally, in February 2020, called it a day to take care of her grandchildren. These guys were family. I made regular trips to Koduru, Cuddapah, Rajampet to assist my father in the selling of my mother’s estate in the village. We made some lovely trips to Munnar and Kodaikanal, and stayed at the Sterling Lake View and Sterling Valley View and, after a transfer of loyalties, at the Mahindra Resorts at Kodaikanal and Munnar. In 1997 we made a trip to Phukhet in Thailand (parasailing, treks, watching the tourists and taking dips in the sea, and not to forget a fantastic dinner-show performed by transvestites). We had a stop in Bangkok and visited old friends in Singapore. Kathmandu and Bhaktapur were fascinating with all the temples, palaces and wooden structures. We walked through the crowded streets, saw carved statues and visited Durbar Square (brought down in the 2015 earthquake).We visited plenty of temples, and the Bodhinath Stupa. We drove to Nagarkot and Dhulikhel, fascinating places with beautiful views of the Himalayas. In Pokhara we stayed at a hotel that was by a lake and had beautiful views of the snow-capped mountains. On our return to Kathmandu we drove down to Chitwan National Park, hoping to sight some tigers, but, except for being greeted with pugmarks and poop, we saw none. We were fortunate enough to see some rhinoceroses and buffaloes. Venkat had by now became very adept in handling the still and video cameras. On our return journey alongside the Rapti River (with tourists white water rafting), we saw some action—the minivan’s air-conditioning failed and Rohini fainted! Fortunately she recovered after some rest and a water splash. 235

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Above: Wedding of Rohini, Chennai, August 4, 2000 Below: Birth of Viraj, London June 13, 2006

In Calcutta we were guests of Dad’s friends Sudhakar and family. Excellent hospitality, including a car and driver, allowed us to visit all the places of interest, including Flury’s and New Market. Our joy didn’t last long. Delhi was a burning hell. Ratna and Geetha had a great house-warming function despite the heat, with shamianas and coolers. Venkat did a brilliant job in filming the event. Rohini got married on 4 August 2000 and left for England. Our family met in the UK in 2006, when her son Viraj was born. We had a lot of old friends drop by in London when we were there. Venkat was in London on a 45-day training programme with William Lea, during which time Rukmini travelled there to meet Sudeep. That meeting eventually fructified into a marriage on 16 December 2007. Beena was already in London to help Rohini, and I visited to attend Viraj’s first birthday in 2007. It was a pleasure catching up with Peter (Ove Arup, Singapore 1984) and Ann Knight on that occasion. Rohini went out of her way to ensure we saw most of London, guiding us on how best to use the transportation system and handing me wads of pounds to spend for entries 236

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Rohini went out of her way to ensure we saw most of London, guiding us on how best to use the transportation system and handing me wads of pounds to spend for entries to places, and on food. The crème de la crème of our trip was our wedding anniversary gift from Rohini—an evening at the opera to see “The Phantom of the Opera”

to places, and on food. The crème de la crème of our trip was our wedding anniversary gift from Rohini—an evening at the opera to see ‘The Phantom of the Opera’. What a show! Rohini ensured we visited Windsor Castle as well. It was such a pleasure catching up with Jal Mehta and his wife Ruksana, and Ravinder Balasingham, both my friends from Lawrence School Class of 1967. Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the places and moments that take our breath away. - Anonymous A quote in a book given to me on my retirement by Venkat proved very handy. It was titled 1,000 Places To See Before You Die by Patricia Schultz. We make every effort to see the places indicated as a ‘Traveler’s Life List’. We have a long way to go as in the words of Robert Frost: These woods are lovely, dark and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep.” Retirement saw us travel all over the country, particularly to Hyderabad and overseas. We also visited the kids in Virginia fairly regularly. I have listed, in chronological order, the places visted. 1. Australia – Sydney, Surfers Paradise, Melbourne with Rohini, Rukmini, Venkat, 1994 2. Nepal – Kathmandu, Pokhara, Dhulikhel, Nagarkote, Chitwan; Calcutta, New Delhi with Rohini, Rukmini and Venkat, 1995

Sunday brunch at King Family Vineyards, Charlottesville, 2009

The Gopinaths and the Prithvirajs at Colombo, 2017

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3. Singapore, Bangkok, Phuket with Rohini, Rukmini, Venkat,1996 4. Atlanta, GA to visit Tich, Houston to visit Potu Raos and kids, Asha & Ramakrishna Reddy, 2009 5. Paris, Amsterdam, Dubai, 2011 6. Holland America Baltic Cruise – Rotterdam, Copenhagen, Warne Bunde (Berlin), Tallin (Estonia), St. Petersburg (Russia), Stockholm, Helsinki with IWA, 2011 7. Egypt – Cairo, Memphis, Saqqara, Dahsur, Giza, Aswan, Abu Simbel, Nile Cruise, Kom Ombo, Edfu, Luxor-West Bank (Valley of Kings and Queens, Temple of Queen Hatsheput), Luxor-East Bank (Karnak and Luxor Temple), 2012

Nile dinner cruise and visiting the Pyramids, 2012

Left: The Mendenhall Glacier Alaskan Cruise, 2013. Right: Paris hop on hop off, 2011 238

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Clockwise from top left: Sossusvlei, Namibia, 2015 ( l-r) Beena, Radha, Preetam & Vardhini, Dipak, Hilke & Ranga, Pradeep Kakkar & Bonani, Susan, Gopi and Ashokan; The Prithvirajs and the Gopinaths at the Shwe Dagon Pagoda, Yangon, Myanmar, 2019; and Halong Bay, Vietnam, 2018

8. Washington DC (stayed with Vikram) to attend Venkat’s Commencement Ceremony, 2013 9. Alaskan Princess Cruise – Seattle, Ketchikan, Skagway, Juneau (Tracy Arm Fjord), Mendenhall Glacier and Victoria BC with Rohini and Viraj (missed Venkat), 2013 10. Hong Kong and San Francisco to visit Venkat, Arjun and Sandhya Reddy, 2014 11. Charlottesville, VA to visit Rukmini/Sudeep and attend to Alaina’s delivery, 2014 12. Namibia – Naukluft, Palmwag, Etosha (Botswana), Mokuti, Ngepi, Chobe Game Lodge, Zimbabwe (Victoria Falls, Zambezi River Lodge) with Ashokan and Radha’s family (College of Engineering, Guindy), 2015 13. South Africa – Johannesburg, Cape Town and the Garden Route, 2015 14. Pulau Langkawi and visiting Kumars in KL,Malaysia, 2015 15. Singapore for Poornima’s wedding with Rohini and Viraj 2015 239

Holidays Around the World Reminiscence

The Iguazu Falls, Brazil, 2016

Cape Town, South Africa, August 2015 Siem Reap, March 2018

Uffizi Gallery, Florence, October 2018 with Ian and Odile

Tallin, Estonia, 2011

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Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam, 2018 Phuket, Thailand 1995

Holland, 2011 Bangkok Thailand, 1995

Mossel Bay, Garden Route, S. Africa, 2015

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16. Charlottesville, VA, and San Francisco (Ramesh drove us to pray at the spot where Venkat fell and visit Venkat’s collegues and roommates, Ethiraj, Arun Kumars and Basus), 2016 17. Brazil – Rio de Janiero, Sao Paulo, Iguaza Falls; Peru – Machu Picchu, Cusco, Lake Titicaca - Puno, Lake Sandovel (Tambopata National Reserve - Puerto Maldonado, Lima) with IWA 2016 18. Sri Lanka – Bentota, Galle, Kandy, Nuwara Eliya, Kandy & Colombo with Rohini, Viraj, Bharathi, Bobby, Dimpu, Meredith and kids, 2017 19. Crozet, Virginia, USA – birth of Samara, 2017

Above: The Rialto, Venice, 2018. Below left: The Peterhof Summer Palace, Petergof, St. Petersburg, 2011. Right: Napa Valley with Venkat, 2014

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Machu Picchu, Peru, 2016

In Pompeii, Italy, 2018

The Mermaid, Copenhagen, Denmark, 2011

View of Rio de Janiero from the Sugar Loaf Mountain, Brazil, 2016

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20. Cambodia – Siem Reap, Angkor Wat; Vietnam – Hanoi, Ha Long Bay, Ho Chi Minh City, Cu Chi tunnels, Mekong delta, 2018 21. Paris-Italy drive with Ian and Odile Dewsbury – Bourges St. Maurice, Lake Como, Venice, Murano, Burano, Florence, San Gimignano, Arezzo, Pisa, Sienna, October 2018 22. Italy – Milan, Naples, Ischia, Sorrento, Capri, Pompeii, Positano, Ravello, Amalfi, Rome, October 2018 23. Burma – Yangon, Mandalay, Amurapura, Bagan, Pindaya, Ngaung Shwe, Kalaw, Inle Lake, Indeim with Bharathi and Bobby, 2019 24. Crozet, Virginia and the dream run to Mt. Rushmore, Crazy Horse Mountain and Yellowstone park courtesy Seshu and Vandhu (Sioux Falls, SD), 2019 25. Awaiting the opening of sealed borders owing to Covid to capitalize our visa and flight tickets to New Zealand (May, 2020) My friends from Berkeley (1974), Jim and Cynthia, and Ian and Odile from Paris visited us in Chennai in 2018. They visited Mabalipuram, Pondicherry, and flew down to Kerala to visit Cochin, Allepey, Kumarakom, Thekkadi, Thattakadi bird sanctuary and Munnar (thanks to the arrangement by my classmate A.C. Chummar (LSL 1967 Sum) and Sunil Narula (LSL 1967 Sum) made arrangements for them to visit Delhi, Agra, Jaipur and Jaisalmer. We were also delighted when our long-standing friends from our Singapore days, Claire and Alain, flew in from Paris to spend time with us in November, 2018. We have had visits from our friends in Singapore and the USA,

Jim and Cynthia visiting my Mother, Chennai 2018

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Venkat gave me another book on the occasion of Father’s Day 2011, the Lonely Planet Guide to Italy. We worked out plans with my Singapore friends in Paris, and drove from Paris into Italy (I enjoyed driving too), visiting a number of places before Ian and Odile Dewsbury headed back to Paris from Milan while we proceeded south to the heel of Italy. It was a fascinating trip. We assimilated it all and I am sure Venkat would have felt that we had done justice to his book and fulfilled his wish for us. More plans are in the making!

Neighbours and Friends Our Babina friends, Jolly and Joseph, live with their families in Cochin, and Deepak and Anto live in Trichur. My mother was thrilled talking to Jessy Aunty and recalling their Babina days. Kavitha and Neha were the children of Col. O.P. Kapoor and Father’s Day gift from Venkat, 2011

Kamlesh Aunty with whom we had the opportunity to spend time in Madras after Udhampur. We had plenty of friends in Madras. Brig. Jind’s children, Brig. Chhachhi’s children—Dimple and Sheeba, Ranadhir (Ranu), Nivi and Rekha (Brig. Nayudu’s kids). My sister’s friends were my friends too. I recall Geetha, Roopa and Hema (who passed away at a very early age); and Bimbo from Fiji and Uttara Natu (whom we visit each time we are in Washington DC). These friends combined with other friends from college and school in Madras made life very enjoyable amidst the rigours of college

Venkat gave me yet another book on the occasion of Father’s Day 2011, the Lonely Planet Guide to Italy. We worked out plans with my Singapore friends in Paris, and drove from Paris into Italy

routine. I made some good friends in Round Table, 41 Club No. 7 and Freemasonary. Always willing to give a helping hand were my brother-in-law D. Radhakrishna (Beena’s brother) and Nandini, and M. Pallam Raju (former HRD Minister in the UPA government). K.S. Manian (Cheenu), a thorough gentleman who, despite his busy schedule, would take time out to return calls, was my colleague (CEG 1973) and provided guidance and direction for the various problems my family and I faced. His wife Ranjini Manian guided us spiritually in the path of Prof. Eknath Easwaran’s thoughts and introduced us to Swami Chitanandaji. In Singapore, our neighbours were Kalyan and Kalyani Chatterjee. They would babysit “Butch” (Venkat) and were indeed very helpful neighbours. Fatima and Sam Alagirisamy in Sunsetway, Clementi from 1987 remain our dear friends. The families gracing the occasion of weddings in each one’s family. Tessa, my insurance agent (now married) is a darling, always smiling hosted me to the best Hainan Chicken Rice at the Hotel Mandarin on Orchard Road. Swapna and Prathaban, Late Sim H.H. and Lily, Lim Peng Cheong and Lorena are other friends that come to mind in Singapore. I am still in touch with Dave Wakefield (Shell) and Ann, Tom van Leenen (Shell), 245

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Radha Bhavan, Alwarpet, Chennai, lit up to celebrate Venkat’s birth, 1983

Govind Villa, Kalakshetra Colony, Chennai, 1994

Sai Subadhara Villa, Kodaikanal, 2007

Samyuktha Apartments, Tambaram, Chennai, 2017

Beach House, Akkarai, 2002

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Staff (l-r) Jyothi, V. Muthu, S.K. Mani and Murugesan

Ian Dewsbury (Dragage) and Odile, Claire and Alain Deniau (Dragage). My driver Bamg Bamg and maid, Atoon in Indonesia need mention for the love and care. Sam McDonald and Cathy, Bob Weirich, Kevin Mobbs, Morris Wire along with Tony Anderson, Sandra and a whole lot of others in our Conoco office bring fond memories of a well-executed project. In the USA, its Chuck LaChapelle and Veronica, Kent and Penny without whom our visits to Charlottesville, USA would be unexciting. Coffee shops, traditional American breakfasts, steak dinners and time spent well. Chuck is a great buddy. Last but not least are Rukmini’s and Sudeep’s numerous friends in the USA. I would fail in my duty not to mention our Chennai staff, S. Kanagamani (driver over 15 years), Murugesan our watchman (12 years), Veera Muthu (Alwarpet watchman 10 years) and Jyothi our Tambaram caretaker of over 10 years.

Homes

Rukmini lives in Virginia, USA, and owns a town house in Charlottesville and a beautiful home in a wooded estate in Crozet, about 12 miles away from Sudeep’s workplace

After our Alwarpet home, which my great-grandmother Subadhramma had built, my father built a two-storeyed home after retirement, on Arundale Beach Road, Kalakshetra Colony, Chennai. The rental on this was his retirement ticket. He allowed me to build an additional storey on the same building, which serves as a home for Rohini and Viraj. We did build ourselves a beach house with a swimming pool. This was the ticket to my retirement. After having been in Lovedale, my love for the hills remained. I was keen to have a cottage up in the hills. With a special sanction I managed to build a cottage with a rose garden on a half-acre plot. My neighbour in the hills is Jayashree, who helped me during the construction of the cottage and continues to oversee the maintenance, is the wife of the late Dr. Ramaraj Kumar (LSL, Nil, 1962. Her mother, Kausalya, was known to us in the 70s and 80s in Madras. The Nilgiris connection seemed everywhere. The gentleman who sold the property to me was the late Sunil Gulvadi (LSL 1958 I think!) and his wife Mallika became our friends. Rohini has a home in Canary Wharf along the Thames River and a beautiful apartment in Trendset Wins in Hyderabad. Rukmini lives in Virginia, USA, and owns a town house in Charlottesville and a beautiful home in a wooded estate in Crozet, about 12 miles away from Sudeep’s workplace. “Venkat Villa”, named after her brother, was possible through his support. 247

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Dad’s 60th birthday celebrations, 1983

Gopi’s 50th birthday, Chennai 2001

Milestones – Celebrations No family tale is complete without a listing of its celebrations and notable events. 1. March 14, 1923 – Dad’s birthday 2. September 28, 1936 – Mom’s birthday 3. February 22, 1948 – Mom and Dad’s wedding date 4. March 29, 1950 – Geetha’s birthday 5. September 15, 1951 – Gopi’s birthday 6. February 07, 1954 – Beena’s birthday

Dad’s 80th birthday - Sathabhishekam, 2003 248

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Beena’s 50th birthday, Chennai 2004

Gopi’s 60th birthday - Sashtiapthapoorthi, Chennai 2011

Celebrating Gopi’s 60th birthday, Chennai 2011

Celebrating Christmas with Radha Bai Avva, Chennai 2005

7. February 28, 1972 – Geetha and Ratna’s wedding in Madras 8. June 29, 1975 – Beena and Gopi’s wedding in Hyderabad 9. July 23, 1976 – Rohini is born in Hyderabad 10. November 30, 1978 – Rukmini is born in Hyderabad 11. March 31, 1981 – Dad retired from Indian Defence Services (MES) 12. March 14, 1982 – Dad’s (60th birthday) celebration 13. August 15, 1983 – “Butch” Venkatraj was born in Chennai 14. September1988 – Byepass Heart surgery on Dad in St. Luke’s hospital, Houston 15. April 1996 – Rohini graduates with BA (Corporate) degree from Ethiraj College, Chennai. 16. September 28, 1996 – Mom’s 60th Birthday celebrated quietly with Dad in Tirumala 17. May 1998 – Rohini graduates from LIBA with an MBA 249

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18. June 30, 1999 – Vandhana and Seshu get married in Chennai 19. June 2000 – Venkat enters Mahindra’s United World College, Pune 20. May 2000 – Rukmini obtains BA (English) degree from WCC, Chennai 21. August 04, 2000 – Rohini gets married 22. September 15, 2001 – Gopi’s 50th birthday 23. March 14, 2003 – Dad’s Sathabhishekam 80th Birthday celebrated 24. February 07, 2004 – Beena’s 50th Birthday celebrated 25. April 22, 2004 – Rukmini obtains an MBA from ITM, Chennai 26. April 2005 – Venkat graduates with an BA (Economics) from Loyola College, Chennai 27. June 13, 2006 – Rohini’s son Viraj is born in London 28. June 2007 – Oliver, our pet cocker spaniel, passes away, aged 12 years 29. July 22, 2007 – Dad passes away 30. December 16, 2007 – Rukmini and Sudeep get married in Chennai 31. December 2007 – Mom’s pet cat Pussyboy passes away, aged 11 years 32. September 2011 – Venkat departs for Washington DC (Kogod School of Business) 33. 15 September 2011 – Gopi’s Sashtiapthapoorthi celebrations (15th September, 1951) Venkat and my mother (in New Delhi) sorely missed at the celebrations 34. May 2013 – Venkat’s valecdictory speech at Class of 2013 commencement Ceremony (Kogod School of Business, Washington D.C.) 35. 24 June 2013 – Rukmini’s daughter Alaina is born at the Martha Jefferson Memorial Hospital, Charlottesville, VA 36. October 2013 – Venkat moves to California 37. 29 April 2014 – Ratna Rao passes away at Medanta Hospital, Gurgaon, Haryana 38. Jan 2014 – Dec 2015 – Venkat works with Landor, San Francisco, CA 39. 22 December 2015 – Venkat passes away in San Francisco, CA 40. April 2017 – Rohini and Viraj move to Chennai and Viraj is admitted into Class VI Sishya

Bridge tournament trophy

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Kung Pao Diced Chicken

The East Coast Seafood restaurants, Singapore

41. 13 June 2017 – Rukmini’s daughter Samara is born at the Martha Jefferson Memorial Hospital, Charlottesville, VA 42. July 23 each year – bridge tournament conducted in honour of my late Father in Madras Gymkhana Club 43. December 25 each year -– We celebrate Christmas with a turkey lunch

Food My Mom’s cooking was always a delight. Anytime I visited her she would have goodies waiting in the refrigerator. You name it, she could make it—Continental, Asian or Indian. We longed for anniversaries and birthdays, for we knew we’d get an elaborate meal. Favourites were fish and chips with tartare sauce, paya and appam, dosa and fish curry, roast chicken, noodles and fried rice, traditional Andhra and Chettinad curries, roasts, peppered pork (recipe passed down three generation) and not to forget the big slices of ‘Vanjaram’ seer fish, and prawns the size of lobsters! A traditional ‘masala bread’ (recipe passed on from generations ago) was delightful at breakfast or tea. My mother even mastered Chicken Rice (Hainan style!!) together with the ground red chilli paste. In the good ol’ days she could make terrific desserts, from trifle puddings to ice-cream sundaes with jelly and fruit, and the most delectable gulab jamuns. Beena certainly has had good training under my mother and has risen to her standards. Rohini and Rukmini are excellent hosts in the tradition of their grandmother—largehearted, and able to produce quick, tasty meals. Keep it up girls! I consider Singapore to be a Foodie Paradise with the best menu for any type of world cuisine. The Chilli Crab with hot buns to dip into the sauce, together with the Chowfan

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My best buddy Chuck with Kent, Charlottesville, 2011

at the Long Beach or the East Coast is to die for. My good friend from work introduced me to a coffee shop in Serangoon that served the meanest porridge with frog’s legs. It was simply delicious. We tried all the fancy restaurants in the good hotels and had no regrets for the monies spent. The BBQ stingray at the Newton Circus Hawkers stall was also enjoyable. Food in Malacca and Penang (Nonya) in Malaysia is also very exciting. I can still recall the wonderful sunset at the Kukup Fishing Village in Johore State and enjoying the wonderful seafood. Indonesian fare is a bit oily for me, but their BBQ fish in banana leaf with sambal and rice is memorable.

Exotic meats - scorpions, snakes...Siem Reap 2018

We tried food in Thailand, Cambodia and Vietnam and we have nothing to complain about. We steered away from exotic dishes like BBQ worms and scorpions, deep fried tarantulas, and snakes. Namibia, Botswana, Zimbabwe and South Africa had a lot of exotic meat on offer, which we tried and tested, and we came out to say we survived—Warthog, Springbok, Crocodile, Kudu, Oryx and Mopane worms. Ashokan (Guindy collegemate, 1971) took us to wonderful restaurant 252

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Clockwise from top left: A two-hour wait for the Gino Sorbillo’s Pizza, Naples; beautiful crockery on display, Capri; and a variety of southern Italian desserts, Naples, 2018

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With Indra (OL 1966) and Barry at the King Family Vineyards, Charlottesville, 2018

called ‘Cattle Baron’ in Windhoek, Namibia, where we enjoyed the Chateau Briand flamed in brandy. The BOMA restaurant along the Zambesi River was where most of the exotic food and mesmerising dancing took place. Italy was another place I could say food was delicioso. The Southern Italian food was very enjoyable and particularly the desserts, Cantucci, Baba al Rum, Seada, Panna Cotta, Tiramisu and Sfogliatella are all mouth-watering even at their mention, and enjoyable enough to keep thoughts of diabetes at bay!! In Naples we were told to try the pizzas at Gino Sorbillo, which we did, and we got to satiate our appetite after a two-hour wait in a long queue. It was well worth the wait. There is not much I can say of food on the cruises. After the first two days it can be a bit boring with the exception of the Captain’s dinner on the last night. Food in America comes in such large portions that one forgets the sensation of savouring every mouthful. Traditional food served at American breakfast places is always something to look forward to. Venkat took us to the Fremont Diner in Napa, 254

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Fremont Diner, Sonoma Napa Valley with Venkat, 2014 (waffles with fried chicken)

where fried chicken was served with waffles. I am not too fond of red meat, but one does enjoy an outing with good wine and well done steak. In a nook in Crozet, VA, we found Sam’s Hot Dog stand that served excellent hot dogs with relish, and hamburgers with French fries. Sunday afternoons spent in wine tasting at a wineries in and around Charlottesville, and having an enjoyable meal, are always well spent. In 1982 my Japanese colleague, Sunao Nakane, from Berkeley, took me out for traditional Japanese fare in Tokyo, and I tried raw fish and Sushi for the first time. Whilst in Pusan, Korea, I got to eat live raw octopus tentacles cut in front of you with wasabi sauce. Our trip to the South Americas (Peru and Brazil) got us to sample all the beans, salads, corn, potatoes, quinoa and meats, and honestly, for my Indian palate it was less interesting. All in a day’s work—food!

MWRT 10; 41 Club No. 7 of India On my return to India in 1987, at the behest of my late brother in law K.P. Bhasker 255

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Round Table India The founder, Louis Marchesi, was a young member of Norwich Rotary Club, who felt a need existed for a club where the young businessmen of the town could gather, on a regular basis. At their meetings they could exchange ideas, learn from the experiences of their colleagues and play a collective part in the civic life of Norwich… Round Table came to India in 1957 with the formation of Madras Round Table No 1 on November 14th 1962. Over the past four decades it has grown to become a 5,000-member strong association. Round Table India is a non-religious, non-political and non-sectarian organisation offering its members the best opportunity to connect with each other, to give back to the society. … 41 Clubs of India: When members graduate from Round Table India, they are invited to join “41 Clubs of India” to continue their services. This National Association of Past Tablers provides a lot of support to the service activity of RTI. Round Table International: Round Table has gained worldwide recognition with over 40,000 members in 2700 clubs across 65 countries. Round Table India is a member of Round Table International. Website of Round Table India

41 Club No. 7 members with guests, 2019 256

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Above: A unique dinner hosted by Shammi Mehta, Sangeet Chopra and Gita Mhetras for the 41 Club No.7, August 2019 Below left: Felicitating World Chess Champion Vishwanath Anand and (right) Chairman Gopinath, 41 Club No. 7, 2007-09

I joined the Madras West Round Table 10, which is a part of the Round Table of India. I had 4-5 years of ‘tabling’ before becoming a 41er. I enjoyed tabling as I made new friends in Chennai. It was charity with excessive “spirits”. I enjoyed the cricket games, visits of foreign nationals, and getting up early on Sunday mornings to do charity at orphanages or schools. I enjoyed being an editor of our table magazine for a year, the first year we introduced colour into the publication. Just as I was to become Chairman of MWRT 10, I had a call for a wonderful oil and gas project (Conoco Belida) as a Contracts Manager in a joint venture between Sembawang Group and Kellogg’s Brown and Root (Houston) in Jakarta, Indonesia, which I could not turn down. I became a 41er and joined 41 Club No. 7 of India. We enjoy the monthly fellowships and hosting dinner when our turn came. It gave me great pleasure to be in the midst of some of the founders, like Indu Chandhok and Kris Chitale. 257

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During my term as a Chairman of Club No. 7 (2007-09), we had the pleasure of the World Champion in Chess, Vishwanath Anand, amidst us. Some of the fellow tablers of MWRT 10 in the 41 Club No.7 and their spouses are N. Krishnan (former RTI President) and Hema, C.S. Ananth and Rani, the late J.S. Chopra and Sangeeth, the late Avinash Mhetras and Gita, Bandhu Chandok and the late Veena, the late K.P. Bhasker and Anuradha, Kanu Motwani and Shobha, K.V. Kesu and Venu, C. Meyyapan and Nachia, R.V. Rajan and the late Prabha, V. Sridhar and Priya, Srinivasan and Uma, S.L. Sud and Sarita, and the late Tojo Mehta and Shammi. Members from other tables, who were friends, are Sampath (International President) and Geetha, V.S. Narasimhan and Mridula, K. Rajendran, S. Ramanathan and Padma, Satyan Bhatt and Parul, the late N. Sudhir and Usha, and Vijay Gauhar and Pramilla. We were also invited to events at other clubs. Indu (& Indra), Ted (& Maureen), Ramesh Narayan (& Shanta), Gopal (& Prasanna) and Kuntal (& Reena).

(l to r) RW Bro. Sampath, RW Bro. Theo Devagnanam, W Bro. Gopi and W Bro. Ponniah at Chennai, Feb 2013

RW Bro. K.R. Menon at the DGL Bangalore, August 2008

Felicitating W Bro. Gopal Madhavan on completion of 50 years in Masonary, February 2018 258

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Freemasonry in Madras The District Grand Lodge of Madras is the administrative and controlling body of Freemasons lodges functioning in the States of Tamilnadu, Andhra Pradesh, Karnataka and Kerala collectively referred to as the District of Madras for Masonic purposes. Freemasonry has existed in the Coromandel Coast for more than 250 years, the first Lodge having been consecrated in Madras in 1752. The head of the DGL is called the DISTRICT GRAND MASTER and is appointed under the authority of the Grand Master of the UGLE in London. Currently, the District of Madras has 18 lodges and the total membership is of the order of 1200 with a few dual memberships. They are drawn from educated, responsible and well-informed men with a dispensation for knowledge and charity. The District Grand Charity of Madras dispenses charity in the form of support and relief to indigent masons, indigent widows of masons, scholarships to students to pursue higher education, etc. Some lodges have medical clinics operated by them and others aid and assist specific divisions or functions in public hospitals. InChennai the lodges meet in spacious premises at Ethiraj Salai (formerly Commander-in-Chief Road), Egmore, inbuildings constructed in 1928 specifically to house the Temples for meetings. Website of District Grand Lodge

Freemasonary: The Lodge St. George EC 2532 Being an ex-Tabler, Inder Chopra and Ashok Virmani suggested that I join the Lodge on my return from Singapore. After considerable time I eventually joined the Lodge in 2002 and was introduced by W. Bro. Sokhi and W. Bro. Bandhu Chandok. I enjoyed the rituals and made efforts to do them extempore. I occupied the Eastern Chair in the year 2010. Being a Mason gives you the joy of giving charity to educate the underprivileged. The monthly summons of a meeting is followed by the fellowship and dinner. We get to entertain the Ladies of the Lodge at our annual Charter Nite on 23 April, St. Georges Day. Elections are held in August followed by an Installation ceremony in September. It was a privilege to have known and met the following District Grand Masters of Madras: R.W. Bro. Col. G.S. Gill, R.W. Bro. K.R.N. Menon, and the current DGM, R.W. Bro. Theo Devagnanam (Lawrence School schoolmate). A special mention of my mentors, R.W. Bro. Sampath, W. Bro. Indu Chandok, W. Bro. Gopal Madhavan, W. Bro. Bandhu Chandok, and W. Bro. Mukerjee (Babuji). A fellow Lawrencian, R.W. Bro. Abraham Markos has also risen up the ranks to become the Regional Grand Master of the Regional Grand Lodges of Southern India (Indian Constitution). 259

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It is worth mentioning that Swami Vivekananda, Pandit Motilal Nehru and Fakhruddin Ali Ahmed were all Masons.

Path to Spirituality

With Christine at Ramagiri, Petaluma, CA, 2016

The EE Satsang group with Swami Chidananda (Founder, Ranjini Manian, standing second from left)

Professor Eknath Easwaran, our spiritual guide

I am not spiritually oriented. Unlike me, Beena prays every day, reads the Hanuman Chalisa, and every night before going to bed she reads pages of the Sai Sat Charitra of Shirdi Sai Baba. With Venkat’s passing we pursued the road to spirituality together. Ranjini Manian, wife of my friend and collegemate, Cheenu Manian, is a global entrepreneur in her own right. She introduced us to the teachings of Prof. Eknath Easwaran of Berkeley.

On a trip to San Francisco to pray at the spot where Venkat fell in 2016, we drove up to the Blue Mountain Centre of Meditation at Petaluma, Tomales, California. We had the honour of meeting Prof. Eknath Eswaran’s wife, Christine, who was celebrating her 95th birthday. Since 2016, we have been attending the Satsang every Saturday afternoon. Coming from a construction background, I found my hard compulsive ways give in to the 8-point programme of Prof. Eknath Easwaran, and over the four years thus far am able to see some transformation within myself. Beena has always been a cool, composed, collected person who never shows any sign of agitation, is never judgmental and has never flipped her lid, as I do. As I write this in 2020, with social distancing in practice, members continue the Satsang each Saturday by Zoom.

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SECTION 3

THE NEXT GENERATION

12. Rohini’s Story

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13. Rukmini’s Story

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14. Venkat – Our Prince Charming

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CHAPTER

12 Rohini’s Story

y first memories of my family are of warmth, togetherness, eating good food and travelling. I grew up with two siblings—my younger sister Rukmini and my brother Venkatraj. My early years were spent in Chennai, my sister and I living with our paternal grandparents. My baby brother was with my parents in Singapore. I used to look forward to our yearly visits to Singapore and loved the whole experience. Rukmini and I looked forward to our travels with Singapore Airlines and all the goodies they gave us. That was the start of adventure and excitement for me. Rukmini and I spent most of our younger years in Chennai. Our house was always filled with good food, guests and lots of parties. As my grandfather was in the Defence sector, he had a huge set of warm and lively friends whom they entertained very often. Granddad was larger than life and always believed in enjoying life to the fullest. He had a great sense of humour, welcomed all who came home, had a big heart and

Passionate

Celebrating birthday with Grandmom and Mom

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Left: Thatha funded motorised limousine to school Right: Cousins galore! (l-r) Dimpu, Anju, Shriya, Rohini, Rukmini, Vignesh, Venkat Snr., Venkat Jr., Hyderabad, 1984

I cannot forget our annual holidays to Hyderabad in our younger years, where we got to spend time with my maternal grandmother, fondly called MumMum. She was a gentle soul who always wished the best for us

helped anyone who had any problems. He was also a disciplinarian and a stickler for punctuality. Sometimes it seemed very hard on me, but when I look back I thank him for all the values he instilled in me. My grandma loved to feed and take care of anyone who stepped into our house. She has a big heart and nothing brings her more joy than seeing us well fed and happy. I have always admired her. She married very young and took full responsibility for taking care of a large family, and ensured that everyone stayed together. She is very talented and yearns to learn and discover new things. Ruku and I went to Sacred Heart Matriculation Higher Secondary School. We proudly call it Amma’s school, as it’s the very school that our ex-CM Jayalalithaa (Amma) attended. School years were filled with fun and frolic. We were proud to tell people that we were convent girls. I made some good friends and continue to keep our friendship. I cannot forget our annual holidays to Hyderabad in our younger years, where we got to spend time with my maternal grandmother, fondly called MumMum. She was a gentle soul who always wished the best for us. All the cousins would get together at the home in Gunrock Enclave. We used to walk to the Secunderabad Club almost every evening for a swim, step out to hire some videos and pick up some yummy Vadilal chocolate ice cream. Our home was filled with fun and laughter during those two months in summer. All the cousins of different age groups huddled together to catch up on lost time. I have only a few memories of my grandfather Cokie Thatha, I remember his smile and his way of making me laugh. 266

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Top: With my United World classmates, Singapore, 1988 Botton: Sembawang gang: (l-r) Jaya, Lakshmi, Betty, Beena and Yasodha Children (Girls l-r) Sharanya, Rohini, Rukmini, Meghna; (Boys l-r) Boris, Karthik, Chetan, “Butch” (Venkat)

While growing up Ruku and I had the wonderful opportunity of living with my parents and Venkat in Singapore. I remember Hainanese Chicken Rice, KFC, Newton Hawker Centre, Orchard Street, Sentosa Island, Tiger Balm Gardens and Jurong Bird Park. We were given the best of education and went to the best schools. I studied at Tanglin Junior High School and then the United World College. The exposure I had there has taken me through my teenage years into adulthood. I had wonderful experiences and made some great friends. Thanks to Facebook, we are now able to reconnect. I remember our Singapore Sembawang gang. We were a bunch of kids from different parts of India trying to adapt to a new country, people and language. I think this brought us together and we have had some good laughs and shared experiences. We used to look forward to the Indian pot-luck parties, with food brought in by ‘aunts and uncles’ who—Gujaratis, Goans, ‘Tam Brams’, Kannadigas, Telugus, Bengalis… you name it—were all there. I cannot forget our cultural experiences—visiting the temple on Saturday was special; my weekly visits to the Singapore Fine Art Society in Serangoon Road to learn Carnatic music; visits to Little India to eat a dosa or have some fish curry; frequent trips to the famous Mohammed Mustaffa to pick up goodies which ranged from Axe Oil, Tulip sausages and luncheon meat, Kraft Cheese, and saffron to electronic items. As children we were blessed with all the luxuries one could get during that particular era. Dad always believed in giving us the best, expecting us to do our best, and buying the best of anything. 267

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First birthday with maternal and paternal grandparents

Cokie Thatha and Mum Mum

Happy in Hyderabad, 1980

At Woodland’s Drive-in

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Kayaking with Ruku, Port Dickson, Malaysia, 1989

20th birthday celebrations, 1996

Celebrating my 18th birthday, 1994

My best friend Minty, Vandhu, Ruku, friends with Thatha celebrating my 21st birthday, 1997

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I remember getting beautiful clothes from Singapore, fashionable handbags, shoes, cosmetics, the Sony Walkman, CDs of the latest in music and gadgets. I felt so cool going to school to show off with great pride the stuff my Dad used to get me. Dad is big hearted and extremely compassionate. What I hold dear about him is that he is always ready to help anybody in need and ready to give up anything he has to help the other person. He is selfless and very driven. I hope I have picked up some of his fine qualities, not just my temper! We had some fabulous holidays. Dad always made the effort of taking the entire family on a yearly vacation. Nepal, Australia, Sri Lanka, Thailand, Phuket, Kodaikanal (to our family home)—our holidays were filled with adventure, laughs and lots of eating! Mom was the angel that kept us all together. Managing three growing children was not easy, yet she never screamed or shouted or got angry. She was always calm and there for us. I know I can always count on my parents; they are my backbone; they have never let us down. Moving back to Chennai from Singapore was a little difficult. In Singapore, we lived with foreign accents of Singaporeans and expats and we enjoyed a diverse lifestyle. And then we had to move back to extreme humidity, learn the local language and, most importantly, I had to acquaint myself with the Sciences and Maths in school. The first year was tough, but thanks to the Top: Washington DC and Alaska, 2013 multiple tuitions I had, I was able to fly through the second year. Middle: Srilanka, 2018 and Kodaikanal , 2010 Bottom: Managing three kids!!

The early 1990s were exciting. The start of a new era in Bollywood introduced us to the world of the Khans—be it Amir Khan, Salman Khan or Shah Rukh Khan, I must 270

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Left: Graduation Day, Ethiraj College, B.A. Corporate, 1996 Right: College excursion to Mysore, 1995

have watched all their movies. I saw Qayamat se Qayamat Tak and Maine Pyar Kiya at least 10 times. Ruku and I had Khan posters on our walls, with our parents warning us they had better not leave any marks on the walls. School flew by and I entered Ethiraj College to do my BA Corporate Secretaryship. Three years whizzed past, and I enjoyed every bit of my college days. I pretty much figured myself out during these years and grew up. I then pursued an MBA at Loyola Institute of Business Administration and specialised in Marketing. I remember frequenting the Loyola canteen and Sangeetha for mini tiffin at the end of every month when we were low on pocket money. Thanks to Dad I got my first car, a blue Maruti 800. I used to carry all my friends in it as we headed to various parties, and did a lot of drops and pick-ups, acquiring a few dents and bruises in the process. On graduating from LIBA I was all set to conquer the world with my new found independence and the desire to work in order to make a living.

Dad is big hearted and extremely compassionate. What I hold dearly about him I was fortunate to get into the Taj Group of Hotels, Chennai, in Sales and Marketing. Looking back, I can say that this was truly the best job I’ve ever had. What was not to is that he is always like about my role. I was with a young, dynamic team; I was given various privileges ready to help

to wine and dine and travel to any of the Taj Hotels; I had my own car to take me to work; I got my laundry done there; I took home croissants and pastries almost every day. Most importantly, this job gave me the platform to establish my confidence and find myself. I enjoyed the work, which included interactions with the various Consul Generals and their colleagues, and with top Management from various companies. As I was enjoying and living my life marriage came into the picture and like almost all girls at that age, I thought about getting married and settling down. My fiancée was 271

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Holidaying in Egypt, 2005 (left) and Amsterdam, 2003 (right)

from Hyderabad and was living and working in London. In 2000, we got married in Chennai and left for London. I loved London from the very beginning—the lush, verdant parks, London buses, the Underground, the theatre, the museums and not forgetting the palaces. There was so much history in this diverse city. I remember entering the Tube one day soon after I had moved to London, thinking I would hear people talking only in English, but to my surprise I heard all sorts of languages but English, including Telugu. This was an era in my life which gave me good memories of buying a home, travelling to Europe (Paris, Amsterdam, Prague) and Egypt, enjoying good wine and cheeses, making friends for life, and most importantly, it gave me my son Viraj. Viraj was born in London, in 2006. I remember that summer—it was recorded as the hottest summer in the previous 20 years. The underground railway could not function, table fans were sold out and the whole city came to a standstill in that heat. Mom had come for the delivery and was by my side throughout. I got to see Dad, Ruku and Venkat who came to bring in Viraj’s first birthday. I enjoyed taking Viraj out as a toddler almost every day. We visited parks, shopping malls and had wonderful With Viraj and me with friends at ‘Trendset Winns’, Hyderabad, 2014 rides on the London buses. 272

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We moved back to Hyderabad, India, in 2008. I spent eight years in Hyderabad. I have some fond memories of eating Haleem, Kebabs, partying with the Page 3 group, and I developed some very deep friendships with people who lived in the community I last lived in—Trendset. Viraj spent much of his childhood here and made some good friends. We tragically lost Venkat in a freak accident in December 2015. The memories of the call I received from my father, letting me know he was no more are very fresh in my mind. The shock and grief still remains as I reconcile to the spiritual fact that I will meet him soon someday. He is with me at all times and that keeps me going. Losing Venkat brought me and Viraj back to Chennai in 2016, bag and baggage in tow. We moved into Mom and Dad’s home.

Top: “My Venkat Mama”

The years 2016-17 saw Viraj and me settling down in Chennai. It was a difficult phase for Viraj to move to a new place, new school and friends, but being Viraj, he never questioned or asked why we were moving. He went with the flow and trusted my judgement. This move has brought my family together. I remember Venkat always telling me, “Akka why don’t you move back to Chennai,” and that’s exactly what I did. I got back in touch with my school and college friends—so much had changed and so many had moved on. Yet there was still the earthiness to Chennai that always existed. I had a few part-time jobs that kept

Satyajit, Minty, Shilpa, Rohini and Chetan Rao, Chennai, 1997

My Loyola (MBA) classmates, 1998

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me going; I attended a one-year Education course; I did various things to try and cope with the grief and find a way to move forward. I visited Ruku and her family in the US with Mom, Dad and Viraj. It was wonderful to spend quality time with my two gorgeous nieces Alaina and Samara. Viraj misses them like crazy and always looks forward to catching up with his two kid sisters. I travelled to Turkey with my friends, Rima and Amar and their daughter Mihika. It is a beautiful country with its combination of history and modernity. 2018-19 sailed by with its share of ups and downs.

Top: Madras Gymkhana Swimming Team, 2018 (Viraj kneeling, centre Rohini) Bottom: With Alaina and Samara, 2018

And here I am in 2020. Where did the time go?! It’s almost five years since Venkat left us and yet it still feels raw and painful. Somehow we all put our best foot forward and do the best we can to move on. I think I have always had spiritual leanings. I never went searching for it; it came to me. The journey has been an eye-opener and made me start connecting with myself. I still have a long way to go, but like they say it’s not the end of the journey that matters; it is the journey itself. March 2020 brought COVID-19, a word that will probably stick in our head for many years to come. It has paralysed all of us in our movement and made us think carefully about what we can and cannot do. However, it has helped me calm down and de-stress a bit. It has brought Dad to writing this wonderful book on his lineage, his life and his journey. I am hopeful that life will get better for everybody and there is an upside that is here to stay. A little about Venkat. We were in my grandparents’ home in Alwarpet, Chennai, when Mom was admitted at St. Isabel Hospital. I remember the joy I felt and the excitement in waiting to meet him. Ruku and I walked down the corridor of the hospital to meet him. There he was, the cutest and the most precious little one I had ever seen! He was my baby brother for life and I would do anything to protect him. Growing up, Venkat was always a quiet and thoughtful little boy. Like any other child he had his share of growing pains, but he was always kind and big hearted even at an early age. It gave me great joy to take care of him as the big sister; we were seven years apart, yet we were 274

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kindred souls and always understood each other. Later, he would always say, “Akka, you and I are cut out of the same cloth.” Venkat had a certain grace and dignity with which he conducted himself. His presence was always larger than life and it spoke volumes even when he was quiet. That is the kind of aura he carried wherever he went. Of course, he had his share of ups and downs, and the craziness of being a teenager-almost-adult trying to find his way in the real world. Who didn’t! Venkat could not be pushed into anything he did not want to do and I always admired that about him. He was calm and rational in his thinking. You could scream and shout and rant, but you could not get him to do something if he was not sure about it. He took his time and ended up doing what he felt was right. I wish I could have had a little more time with him. He was always the star of the show. Everybody loved being in his company— his close friends and his family; and even strangers he came across on his trips enjoyed meeting him and were glad to have made his acquaintance. Our family holidays were always fun with him. He had a way of making you laugh and lightening everybody’s mood. He never said anything negative about people and always aimed at seeing the good in everyone. He was fiercely loyal to his loved ones and always went out of his way to help anyone who needed it, be it his family or friends or strangers. He was always positive in his outlook to life, and told me, “Akka, don’t waste your time on the smaller aspects of life. Always look at the big picture.” To date this keeps me going every time I’m down.

Kindred souls, fun and humour, missing out on a fantastic Uncle

He was a wonderful uncle to Viraj and loved spending time with him. It deeply hurts me that Viraj, Alaina and Samara have missed out on having a fantastic uncle who would have doted on them and been their pillar of support. Every time I am concerned about Viraj I always think of Venkat. “Bro, I wish you were here to guide me.” Venkat and I have seen each other through our ups and downs and he 275

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has always stood by me whether in person or spirit. The fact that I knew he was there for me always gave me the strength to move forward in life with all my challenges. December 24, 2015—I will never forget the phone call I received from Dad at 2.30 am telling me Venkat was no more. I was in a state of shock, as I had just spoken to him a day earlier. My initial thought was that I wanted to be taken away, too. I could not think of a life without Venkat—my dear sweet, beautiful, soulful, brother. How could I be without him by my side, but somewhere deep inside Venkat has shown that he is there for me in spirit and lets me know that all the time. He made me promise to meditate and I still do that. Not a day goes by without me talking to Venkat first thing in the morning to reassure myself that it is going to be okay.

I could not think of a life without Venkat —my dear sweet, beautiful, soulful, brother. How could I be without him by my side, but somewhere deep inside Venkat has shown that he is there for me in spirit and lets me know that all the time

Losing Venkat has left a deep void in all of us, but somehow he gives me strength and I know we will meet soon. Until then, as he would have said, I will enjoy this life and be the best version of myself that I can be.

Family—Amma, Grandmom, Grandpa, Mom, Venkat, Sudeep, Ruku and kids 276

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CHAPTER

13 Rukmini’s Story

am Rukmini Gopinath, but everyone knows me as Ruku. I am the daughter of amazing parents, Gopinath and Beena. Dad is from Chennai and Mom from Hyderabad. I am a sandwiched sibling, having an older sister Rohini who is full of life, and a younger brother Venkat who is our guardian angel. It is also indeed a blessing to have our paternal grandmother Smt. Samyuktha with us, who lives in her ancestral home in Chennai. We are a close-knit family, and have had the exposure to different cultures and countries, and met so many different people in all walks of life, and all the gratitude goes to my parents and grandparents who have brought us up, exposing us to different things in life, orthodox and conservative, as well as progressive. Birthday celebrations with grandparents

(l-r): Churchpark, Tanglin Junior, Singapore 1988, Churchpark (l-r) Mahalakshmi, Haleh, Vandana and Ruku 279

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With Tanglin classmates; YAP programme to Europe, 1999

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Clockwise from top left: Oliver our pet cocker; Rukmini; Rhonda, Preetha and Reena; With Akka; At one of our numerous ceremonies for ancestors; Receiving my medal and degree (ITM) 2004

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I know he will always be with us and continue to shower his blessings on all of us, and Sudeep and I decided to take our relationship to the next level with the blessings of our elders

Growing up, I did my schooling in Sacred Heart Matriculation Higher Secondary School until 1st grade, and then moved to Singapore and studied at Tanglin Junior School as Dad was positioned there on a project with the MRT. Singapore has always been a second home for me, having lived there for several years. I did make some close friends, whom I am still in touch with, thanks to Facebook. It certainly was not easy moving back to India, and to finish middle school and high school at Sacred Heart, a conservative girl’s convent, after studying at Tanglin, a coed school. We did it. It took me a while to get adjusted to the different schooling system. I missed my friends and neighbours, and longed to be back, but with time I slowly settled down, started to make new friends, and tried to work hard at my books. After I finished school, I went on to WCC—Women’s Christian College—from 1997–2000, where I got a Bachelor’s degree in English Literature. I made some amazing, close friends here, with who I am still in touch, 23 years and counting. Wow, time flies. I don’t make friends easily, and am very cautious yet trustworthy. When I do get to know someone it is for life, and I treasure my friends. On finishing my Bachelors, I did a one-year programme in 200001, called the PGDBA in HR—Post Graduate Diploma in Human Resources—at Loyola College. It was an interesting course and I decided to specialize and do my Masters in Human Resources. I went on to study at the ITM— Institute for Technology and Management (2001-04). The programme was a twinning programme that was affiliated to the Southern New Hampshire University in Boston. On completion, I was awarded a Silver Medal—a proud moment for my Granddad and Dad who were Gold Medallists. A time comes in a girl’s life to marry and settle, at least for most. My parents and grandparents have always been open-minded and supportive in their views, and allowed all three of us siblings to work, get exposure and be independent in all matters. In 2005, I finished my Masters, to work at a property management and event management company. Being an introvert by nature, working in this company helped me come out of my shell. In early 2007, after several proposals put across by friends and family, I finally met my prince charming, who was originally from Bangalore and now studied and worked in Virginia, USA. It was an arranged proposal by my parents, who gave us the opportunity to get to know each other through chats, email, phone calls, and later to meet each other in person, to take matters forward.

Our reception, Bangalore 2007

Sudeep and I met in London. I stayed with my sister in Canary Wharf. Sudeep had to leave the USA to extend his H1B visa, and it was convenient for me to travel to London to meet him in 2007. We had got to know 282

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each other over the previous few months and were comfortable with each other. We felt an immediate connection, ala DDLJ style. We got to know each other better while travelling around London. My mother and Venkat, who were visiting London, and my sister decided that Sudeep it will be. Sudeep proposed to me on the 7th of July 2007 in my sister’s apartment, as it was too late to go out. He hoped to propose to me in a park, by a pond, under a moonlit sky. He eventually decided to give in to Mom’s request, as it was already late. My answer was YESSSssssss! It was a happy moment for everyone. I still cannot forget that day. While it was happiness on one side it was sadness on the other—we lost our dear grandfather Shri. Govindarajulu in the same month, on the 22nd of July, 2007. He was an amazing human being with a big heart, intelligent and compassionate. We learnt so much from him and sought his wisdom. His absence will leave a big void for us. We miss you, Thatha.

At our marriage with Sudeep’s sister Sangita and his parents, Chennai, December 16, 2007

Tradition dictated that a marriage was to be conducted within six months of a death in the immediate family, or we would have to wait until a year had passed. My grandmother, graciously in spite of her grief, gave us the go ahead to perform the wedding. My parents and Sudeep’s, Shri. Suresh Naidu garu and Deepa garu, decided to go ahead with my grandmother’s suggestion. I know that my grandfather would have wished that as well. It was heart-breaking to know he would not be there for the wedding; he always looked forward to seeing me settle down, as I was the last granddaughter to get married and had remained with my grandparents for the longest time. I know he will always be with us and continue to shower his blessings on all of us, and Sudeep and I decided to take our relationship to the next level with the blessings of our elders. Oh my god, I was getting married! I could not believe it. I had taken time in looking for the right person and now I was going to spend the rest of my life with him. It was definitely worth the wait. Sudeep and I were formally engaged on 30 August 2007, and got married on 16 December 2007 at the Raja Muthiah Hall (Mandapam) in Chennai, followed by a reception hosted by my in-laws in Bangalore.

Sudeep’s early years Sudeep was born at the unearthly hour of 2 am on Monday, 20 January, 1975. His parents named him Sudeep which evolved out of their names—Suresh and Deepa. His 283

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Ruku came to America as a shy girl known as Sudeep’s wife and carved an identity for herself. In her circle of friends and acquaintances, I am known as Ruku’s husband

memories of his early life are of Bangalore, with his mother’s brother and his family. His only sibling, Sangeetha, was born about 18 months after him. His parents had a busy social life, which was possible because the children could be left behind with their cousins. When Sudeep turned five, his parents moved home, to a house which his dad had built in the same neighbourhood. This became their abode for the next 12 years, where they created many happy memories. When he had to move up to 4th Grade, he transferred to St. Joseph’s where, over the next eight years, he learnt great lessons for life. Sudeep’s most famous seniors included Rahul Dravid, Sandeep Somesh (played hockey for India), Anil Aldrin (played hockey for India) and Sabeer Bhatia (invented Hotmail). The Jesuit institution also ensured that moral values were being inculcated in its students. During his years at St. Joseph’s, he enjoyed playing cricket, hockey and soccer. He pursued his Bachelor’s in Information Science from BMS College of Engineering in Bangalore, for a year, after which he headed to America to pursue a Master’s degree at the School of Computer Science at Old Dominion University in Norfolk, Virginia. Going to America made him fly out of the comfort zone of his parents’ nest. He remembers being woken up early on the morning of September 11, 2001 after a full night of study, just in time to watch the second plane hit the South Tower of the World Trade Center in New York City. He remembers how they all grieved for the many innocent lives that were lost. He remembers the poignancy with which he stared, on his next visit to the city, at the gaping hole where the twin towers had stood and that he had admired so much during his previous visit. That one single event changed life for so many of us. During this time, his sister also came to America to pursue a PhD. in Genetics at the University of Pittsburgh. He was really happy that he finally had family in America. He secured his first full-time job at Vianix LLC in the city of Virginia Beach.

Marriage and Family – Sudeep’s story Towards the end of my stint at Channelblade, I was introduced to Ruku and she ended up becoming Top: “Venkat Villa” our home in Crozet, Virginia Bottom: BBQ on the deck of our townhouse with a million dollar view, my wife. Ruku and I built on the initial connection Charlottesville, Va and never looked back, culminating in me proposing 284

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to her in London, at Rohini’s home, on 07/07/2007. Food, travel, new cultures and our passion for family—we shared a bond in those and in that we had helped take care of our respective grandparents in their later years.

Top: (l-r) Sudeep, Vishal, Raghu, Snehal, Chandu and kids, 2020 Middle: (l-r) Pushpa, Ritu, Yogitha, Ruku, Anita and the kids, 2020

The arrival of Alaina, Martha Jefferson Hospital, Charlottesville Va, 24th June, 2014

Ruku and I were married on 16 December 2007 and the wedding ceremonies were spread over nearly a week. I even took part in a choreographed dance sequence! I began working for SNL Financial. Ruku came to America as a shy girl known as Sudeep’s wife and carved an identity for herself. In her circle of friends and acquaintances, I am known as Ruku’s husband. Ruku forged a strong bond of friendship with them, which continues to endure till this day. Ruku’s strong perseverance to secure our future paved the way for us to buy our first home together. Our townhouse had a million-dollar view from our deck, of the Blue Ridge Mountains. I grabbed an opportunity at work to head back to India to work in our Ahmedabad office, to help build our fledgling project management teams that were based out of India and Pakistan. We moved to Ahmedabad for a whole year in August 2011. My work hours in India were crazy and Ruku really did not have any friends, which made things hard for her, but she gradually settled in. We loved the increased opportunities to see our parents, our extended family and friends. Ruku and I also travelled through Gujarat and Rajasthan. We were really happy to be back home in the US, especially as Venkat, Ruku’s brother, had arrived in the US during our time in India, to pursue an MBA at American University in Washington DC. 285

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Holidays with family and friends

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Clockwise from top left: Dr. Siva Thiagarajan and Peggy; Prasad and Sangita (Sudeep’s sister) with Thea and Aadhya; Naturalization Ceremony, Charlottesville, June 06, 2019; Sedonas (l-r) Peggy and Kent, Sudeep, Samara, Chuck laChapelle, Veronica, Beena, Rukmini and Alaina, July15, 2019 287

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By this time, we were already five years into our marriage and were pretty sure that we were causing concerns with our parents about not having expanded our family. It was after a particularly happy holiday in Hawaii that we decided it was time to have children. I distinctly remember the night when our older child was born. Ruku’s labour was intense and long, and when the baby finally arrived at just past 2 am on 24 June 2014. I was ecstatic. We decided to name her Alaina, which means “Dear Child” in Sanskrit. Ruku and I enjoyed being new parents. Alaina soon became most loved by her maternal grandmother, who spent many hours being up with her and helping us take care of her. She also quickly became the doting niece of Venkat, who showered her with gifts. Venkat came by to visit Alaina in the summer of 2015 and spent precious time with her. Later in 2015, just before Christmas, Ruku and I were shopping at Ikea when Ruku received a call which changed our lives forever. The call was from Venkat’s roommate in San Francisco, who was calling her to express his condolences about his passing the previous day on December 22, 2015. We could not believe what he was saying and were shocked beyond disbelief, as we had not heard about anything having happened to him. We immediately called him back to ensure that he was not playing a cruel prank on us. Ruku and I were distraught and in shock. That is when we realized that we needed to share the news with her parents. The next couple of phone calls that I made to Ruku’s parents are ones that I will never forget and hope that I will never have to experience ever again. Venkat left us way, way too soon and I miss my dear brother to this day. We always feel his presence around us and I often think about him, especially when I am under stress about something and hopeful for a good outcome, or when I am starting something new. I am convinced that he is our Guardian Angel who is always looking over us.

Grandmom with newborn Samara, MJ Hospital Charlottesville, Va June 13, 2017

Ruku and I reached a time when we wanted to complete the circle of life and give ourselves and our families a new source of joy. Samara (meaning Guardian) was born on 13 June 2017. She was in a rush to come out into this world and did not give her mother a chance to even get an epidural. Alaina was ecstatic about having a little sister and took to her instantly. That bond of sibling love has continued to grow between them. When Ruku 288

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was pregnant with Samara, we decided that we needed more space, and we built a home in Crozet. Crozet was the best school district in the county and presented a fantastic opportunity to raise our kids in a safe, secure environment. Our home was beautiful and we moved in just a couple of months before Samara was born, thankfully less stressful because of Rohini’s help. Rohini made a whirlwind trip from India just to help us unpack and settle in. The ever-growing bond that exists between the girls warms our hearts as parents. They are so different in so many ways—Alaina is caring, sensitive and is always thinking about making things better for others, Samara is more independent and carefree and is like Ruku in that she gets attached to a few people and showers them with endless love. The girls have continued to grow in the Crozet community where there are many kids their age. Alaina started public school and amazes us with her rapid development. She soon was able to read almost anything, learnt to ride her bike without training wheels, loved swimming and started ballet lessons. Samara loves to sing and play with her sister, who is her best friend. She is very mischievous and saves the biggest grins for when she knows that she has done something silly. Both the girls dote over their cousin Viraj and we wish they could spend more time with him. They also enjoy spending time with their cousins Thea and Aadhya when we pay visits to each other. Top: The Crozet Couple Bottom: Grandpa with Alaina, 2017

Ruku has been a constant presence in the girls’ lives, staying home to care for them. She continues to be the backbone of our family. The life that we have with our young family in Crozet would not have been possible without the love and support of our families.

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CHAPTER

14 Venkat – Our Prince Charming

enkat, our third child—a son after two daughters—was born on August 15, 1983 in Chennai. Until he was five, we lived in Singapore. Venkat’s early school years were at Winchester Nursery School, Singapore. In India he was initially in Abacus for the year while he waited to get into Sishya. Mr. K.I. Thomas, my Lawrence School Headmaster and the promoter of Sishya, said to me, “Gopi, if I had to admit every child of an Old Lawrencian, on demand, I would have to open another school.” After his class X days at Sishya, Venkat spent two years at the United World College, Pune, where fifty percent of the children were from over 30 different countries. Loyola College, in Chennai saw him complete an undergraduate degree in Economics and excel in dramatics. Venkat was an active member of the Loyola Theatre Society. Swimming, tennis, golf and photography were his other passions.

“Butch”

1st birthday, Singapore 1984

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Winchester Nursery, Singapore 1988 and Abacus, Chennai 1989

Venkat’s first letter dated 30-9-1991 Rakhi celebrations, Chennai

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Clockwise from top left: Sports Day at Sishya 1989; golfing in Kodai; with Rahul Dravid and Saurav Ganguly, birthday celebrations 1993; helping hand in the farm 296

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Venkat’s 10th Birthday, 1993 with Rahul Iyer,Ashwin Limaye,Venkat, Karun Chandhok, Dulquer Salman, Muthu Murugappan and Abhit Prem Sitting: Vandana Verma, Suneethi Raj, Anthara Kothari

Karun Chandhok, Ritika Rai, Venkat, Anisha Thomas and Suneethi Raj, 1999 297

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MUWC, Pune study tour to Rajasthan, 2000

He took part in a Michael Muthu play, “Division Street” (by Steve Tesich), in the lead role of Chris along with Abeet Pillai, his colleague and best mate from Loyola, in 2003. Requiring work experience for an MBA programme in the United States, he worked with a British MNC, William Lea. William Lea sent Venkat to England for training, and the fortunes of the Chennai office changed. In the words of a fellow colleague, Stalin, his return from England brought substantial work to their office. Venkat’s presence in Chennai was a great help to me in combating the presence of a water treatment plant in the

Top: Haran”Gobi”, Vignesh,Varun, Nilofer, Venkat and Kamala, Kodaikanal, 2003 Bottom left: Venkat, Abeet and Haran Bottom right: With Mom 298

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proximity of our land in Tambaram. With an appetite to move forward in the world, he enrolled in the MBA program of the Kogod School of Business, American University, Washington, D.C. Venkat was the guest of Vikram and Anuradha Nehru (LSL VIN 1968) in their beautiful home in Bethesda until he found his accommodation a few days later—a room shared with two others in a home close to campus. His leadership skills saw him elected to the student body. He was a student director in the first year and Vice-President in the second, narrowly missing the position of President. Venkat’s success in academics after a five-year break was commendable. He attained excellent grades and was selected to deliver the graduation speech at the 2013 Commencement Ceremony of the Business School. Beena and I were left speechless with tears of pride. Our son had made us proud. Rohini, Rukmini, Sudeep, Viraj, and my Lovedale schoolmate, Vikram Nehru, were all in attendance to soak in the proud moments. Here’s a link to relive moments of that eloquent speech (http://vimeo.com/m/66004899). Vikram and Anuradha once again hosted the lot of us—Beena, Rohini, Viraj and me.

Dramatics—Winchester, Abacus, Sishya and Loyola College

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Life at William Lea, Chennai, 2007

BASF CSR project, Pondicherry, honoured with a ponnadai by the head of the village, 2009

Venkat’s graduation, Kogod School of Business, AU, Washington DC, 2013

At the Kogod School of Business, Washington D.C., 2013

The family with Vikram Nehru at the graduation, 2013

After Graduation, 2013

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(l-r): Mason Street SF CA; Roommates Sean and Christian; As dapper as it gets

301 (right) Venkat’s last selfie, December, 2015

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An Alaskan cruise with us as a part of the graduation gift was denied to him, thanks to the tardy work of the Canadian Embassy. His two-month visa arrived two weeks after we returned from the cruise. A fine piece of surgery by Dr. Gasho in D.C. for an ACL tear on the right knee kept him recuperating for a couple of months. Venkat got job offers in Washington D.C., but was required to have a green card. Venkat moved to stay with my cousin K.S. Ramesh in San Jose, CA, and landed himself a job in San Francisco with Landor (a company that offered him an interview when he was in Washington DC), a leading branding consultant, in the fall of 2013. He headed home before taking up his assignment, to be with family and be the best man at his buddy’s (Abeet) wedding in Bangalore. The year 2014 onwards saw a financially independent Venkat, without us receiving an SOS. Another proud moment for parents, particularly for me. A family get together on the occasion of Alaina’s birth on 24 June 2014 saw us all congregating in Charlottesville. Venkat visited Chennai again in the fall of 2014, attended his friend Nandini’s wedding in Mumbai, and surprised his sister Rohini with a press to the doorbell at her home in

Making memories with friends from Landor, 2014 (above), family, 2011 (bottom left) and cousins Hyderabad, 2014 (bottom right) 302

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Hyderabad to bring in 2015. Venkat loved his sisters and their tots, Viraj and Alaina. Beena never admonished him, or spoke a harsh word, or ever raised a hand. She raised him with the love and care of a doting mother. They say 13 is unlucky for some. Beena and I saw Venkat for the last time on the 13 January 2015, when he boarded his flight for San Francisco from Chennai. At the wedding of Abeet and Lata, Bangalore, December 2013 with Karuna, Sonu and Brig. Ashok Pillai

The Tragedy A freak accident took him away from us to plunge us into a dark labyrinth, from which we will have to live until our time comes. The nightmare began on Thursday 24 December 2015. In the wee hours, at 02:30 am, I was woken by a call. Any call at that hour would normally bring dread. This time it was my son-in-law Sudeep, to tell me that Venkat was no more. First reactions are not easy to recall. One of my first thoughts was how to tell Beena, who was in Hyderabad, visiting Rohini. Rohini picked up the call and I had to deliver the terrible news. The first callers in those wee hours were my friends Jasbir Singh and Arshi (Engineering classmate), and my cousin Bhasker and Sasi. It is at times like this that caring friends soften the impact of the calamity. Gloom and despair followed. My friend Arun Kumar (Lawrence 1968) was a great source of help in assisting us with legal formalities. He talked to the Consul General of India in San Francisco and expedited matters. Sudeep suggested we have a quiet funeral in San Francisco, but Beena would not have it, since Venkat always wanted to come home. Sudeep and my cousin Ramesh in San Jose ensured that Venkat was on a flight to Chennai from San Francisco. Venkat arrived home in Chennai on 30 December 2015. The seemingly interminable wait from 24 December to 2 January, when the final rites were performed, was the worst one can imagine. I am deeply indebted to Sudeep and Ramesh for all their efforts, made especially difficult with Christmas Eve, Christmas, Boxing Day and the weekend thrown in to further the agonising delay. Ranjini and Cheenu Manian, and my cousin Sai Kishore stood like pillars facing the barrage of statutory and regulatory clearances. Cheenu’s aviation division head, Mithun, handled all the formalities. My brother-inlaw, Radhakrishna, and Nandini stood by us. Ravi Shanmugham was by my side. The soothing words and the presence of relatives and friends helped alleviate our grief. My classmates from Lawrence were a source of strength, with Pal and Chummar coming 303

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Muir Woods and wine tasting, Napa Valley, 2014

to Chennai. We are thankful to all of them. In time, the children and grandchildren returned to somewhat normal lives, and Beena and I embarked on our long journey to face the struggle of accepting our loss. We will certainly need the assistance of the One above to see us through. Venkat’s activities were the essence of his life. Living as a handsome, successful, eligible bachelor in San Francisco, the most sought-after city in the world, he was the envy of many. He worked hard for his employer, and played hard. You name it and it was on his list. Walks through Muir Woods, hiking in Yosemite, wine tasting in Napa, swimming, tennis, photography, entertaining friends from all over the world, bar hopping, fine dining (on recommendations) and driving out into the country—he did them all. He was rather discreet about his girlfriends. Any efforts to push him into matrimony would always have him say “Dad, she’s not my kind”. At 32, he said, “Dad, I will get married even if I am 36. I need to find the right partner. So, don’t lose sleep over it. Chill! Relax!” In the words of a friend, the four-and-a-half years made him an American in many ways. Alas, the American dream was cruelly cut short. We are proud of you, Son. His last call to us made me wonder, later, if he had a premonition of his death. He said to me, “Dad, you are the best Dad in the world!” I immediately switched on the speaker phone so that Beena could hear him, and I gestured to Beena to ask why our son was talking this way. We always ended our conversation with “Love you, Dad” and “Love you, Son”. We spoke about his matrimonial prospects, which he politely avoided 304

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and asked me not to worry about it. He said he was waiting to taste his mother’s dosas and chicken curry. He was looking forward to spending quality time with us without disappearing to Mumbai or Bangalore to meet friends. He asked me to keep his travel plans for the February 2016 a secret from his mother, because he wanted to surprise her on her birthday (7 February), for which he had already bought tickets. He spoke to all those who mattered to him—his sisters and Sudeep, and his friends. Rohini told us that her last conversation with him was jovial, with Venkat laughing and putting on an accent for jokes. Rohini’s last message to Venkat was to remind him of Ruku and Sudeep’s wedding anniversary on 16 December 2015, to which he replied “Thanks, Akks.” Beena, the family and I thank all Venkat’s friends, and all our friends for their caring messages. We thank Mr. Lehmann of Landor for the lovely testimonial of the services rendered by Venkat, a very elaborate, detailed one which spells out what Venkat was all about. We thank Mr. Lehmann for coordinating a response with Venkat’s colleagues. We thank them on our behalf and on behalf of all who knew Venkat in the Landor office in San Francisco. A word of gratitude to Venkat’s landlady, Ms. Suzanne, in Washington D.C., and to his wonderful roommates, Sean and Christian in Mason Street, San Francisco. Venkat had some great friends at University. I thank Andrew Boutros and friends for the Memorial Do for Venkat on the 9 January 2016 in Washington, D.C. As in the words of his friends, Venkat gave friendship a 100%. Venkat’s last holiday was a trip to Iceland to see the Northern Lights with his friend Andrew during the first week of December 2015. Even then, his thoughts were with us. His Facebook message during that trip was “worrying about you guys in the floods of Chennai”. He bought his tickets to visit Chennai from 3 February 2016 through to 28 February 2016, but destiny had other plans for Venkat. We are yet to come to grips with this bizarre tragedy that befell us at a time when the world was celebrating the joy of Christmas and bringing in the New Year. Streams of visitors not only came by but called and even communicated their condolences through the social media. We were all so engrossed in the daily visits and communications that the impact of the grief was softened by all the eulogies and the fine words that all had to say for Venkat, our son. It was sad that we heard these after his lifetime. Venkat had a large circle of friends the world over. A tribute to his qualities is aptly described by the words of his friends and co-workers from home and abroad: love for people and children, a great friend, sensitive, warm, high integrity, charismatic, trustworthy, diligent, kind hearted soul, smart, generous and unselfish heart, diplomatic, 305

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patient, passionate, loyal, caring, modest and humble charm, never shied away from doing fun things, great to be around, good listener, embodiment of positivity, larger than life, great sense of humour, somebody you could count on to cheer you up, ability to motivate, true collaborator and valued partner, providing moral support, hardworking, go-for-it attitude, a lusty laugh that induced incredible joy. Venkat brightened a lot of lives. He touched many hearts and affected many people around the world, and was loved far and near. In the words of a friend, “They say the good go first for a reason. Whatever force is out there saw him as one of the good ones because that’s what he was.” In the words of another, “Heaven just got a little cooler – and funnier.” If Venkat had written his own obituary, it would go thus: Don’t grieve for me, for I am free; I’m following the path God laid for me. I took his hand when I heard his call; I turned my back and left it all. I could not stay another day, To laugh, to love, to work or play. Tasks left undone must stay that way, I’ve found that peace at the close of day. If my parting has left a void, Then fill it with remembered joy, A friendship shared, a laugh, a hug and kiss. Ah, yes, these things I too will miss. Be not burdened with times of sorrow, I wish you all the sunshine of tomorrow, My life’s been full, I savoured much – Good friends, good times, my loved one’s touch. Perhaps my time seemed all too brief, Don’t lengthen it now with undue grief. Lift up your hearts and share with me, God wanted me now, He had found a place for me. RIP, our dear Venkat

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“Until we meet again”

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Venkat’s Correspondence (All correspondence has been reproduced verbatim, without editing.) As fate would have it, this was the last message received from Venkat dated Dec 21, 2015. He passed away on the 22nd of December 2015.

From: Venkat Raj Date: Mon, Dec 21, 2015 at 9:38 AM Subject: Phone in office To: Gopinath Sg Dad, left my phone in the office on Friday so was unreachable this weekend. Will call as soon as I get in tomorrow. -Venkat Raj +1 415-254-0786

On his last birthday, 15 August, we could not wish him and only spoke to him on the 16th.

From: Venkat Raj Date: Sun, Aug 16, 2015 at 11:37 AM Subject: Re: Birthday greetings To: Gopi Sorry I lost my phone on Friday night. Will call you guys tomorrow. Lots of love, Venkat On Sat, Aug 15, 2015 at 6:36 PM, Gopi wrote: Many happy returns of the day. Been trying to call you. Reaches voice mail. Mom and Dad Sent from my iPad -Venkat Raj +1 415-254-0786

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From: Venkat Raj Date: Fri, Aug 7, 2015 at 10:05 PM Subject: Re: To: Gopi Can’t wait to see the pictures. Look forward to talking to Mom and you. Miss you guys a lot. Lots of love, venkat

On Thu, Aug 6, 2015 at 11:31 PM, Gopi wrote: We are on the last leg. We arrived Plettenberg in cape west. The scenery is to be seen to be believed. My phone is giving me trouble. Hence no photos. The sea vegetation plantations etc. is just so beautiful. Trust all well Mum dad Ma. pa tel:0984097887 Sent from my iPad-Venkat Raj

From: Venkat Raj Date: Wed, Dec 21, 2011 at 11:03 PM Subject: Grades To: Gopinath SG Dear Mom & Dad, Hope you guys had a good trip to Hybd and a safe trip back to home. I’m attaching a snap shot of my grades. With the exception of statistics and HR I got A’s on everything. I think I narrowly missed A’s on those 2 subjects. My total current GPA is at 3.6 which around 90. Speak to you guys soon. Love, Venkat

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---------- Forwarded message --------From: Gopinath SG Date: Thu, Dec 22, 2011 at 11:51 AM Subject: Re: Grades To: Venkat Raj Dearest Venkat, We are both indeed very proud of your efforts on seeing your report card. What is more creditable is the fact that you have taken on academics after a lapse of 5 years. Congratulations and keep focussed on your mission. Find out from your professors where u went wrong and can improve. I hope u have your holiday program sorted out and are also ready to take the next semester on. Keep yourself protected from elements. Trust u r enjoying the home cooked food for a change. Lots of love Mom and Dad

Venkat gave the Valedictory speech on behalf of his Class of 2013, Kogod School of Business, American University, Washington D.C. It was a proud moment for us, for friends and relatives who were in attendance, and for my friend Vikram Nehru with whom we were staying in Bethesda, who was present at the commencement ceremony. From: venkatraj.sg Date: Wed, May 15, 2013 at 4:18 AM Subject: Link to speech To: gopinath.sg http://vimeo.com/m/66004899 -Venkat Raj +1 202-553-2535

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Venkat’s First Mail on reaching the USA From: Venkat Raj Date: Fri, Aug 19, 2011 at 3:28 AM Subject: So far... To: Gopinath SG, Rukmini Gopinath, Sudeep Suresh, rohinigopinath Dear everyone, It was unfortunate that I did not get to spend much time at the airport with you guys, but maybe it made saying good-bye a lot easier. I thought I should update you all on my journey so far and I will continue to do so as the days go by. Starting off at Chennai, I wasn’t surprised to have to move 3 kilos out of my excess baggage suitcase as Ruku’s words of a “couple of kgs more wouldn’t matter”, rung strongly in my ears! Luckily as Anna Hazare is battling only senior politicos, a simple bribe of Rs 150 to the baggage handler, got my baggage through. The flight to Doha was fairly empty, no sooner did we get on the plane, I was out for the count. I opened my eyes with 10 mins to land in Doha. The flight was running a bit late and we were whisked away to our connecting flight without the opportunity of touching duty free. After removing everything short of my clothes, I passed security and boarded the longest flight I ever have to DC. The flight was the opposite of Chennai-Doha, being packed, I didn’t spot a single vacant seat. The passengers were varied, from Indian’s to westerners to middle easterners, the burkhas were visible in every nook and corner. Unfortunately, my co-passengers did not share my enthusiasm, as the moment the flight took off they were hidden beneath their blankets. Dad/Sudeep as you rightly mentioned the on-board entertainment was fantastic. It’s clearly what got me through the long duration of the flight. For breakfast I had the potato fritters with chicken sausage and for lunch I had the chicken parmesan with veggies. So clearly food was not an issue. Although I’d hate to have been in the position of a fellow passenger who used the loo after me. Fortunately. he made it out alive. With a half hour left to land in DC, the butterfly’s in my stomach started to make the rounds allowing the nervousness and excitement to kick in. I had dreamt of going to the states for the longest time and it was finally coming true. I couldn’t mask my sheer delight of getting glimpses of what influences the west has had on me. From the cops in the airport to the airport announcements, I had finally arrived. My first impressions did take a hit though. The bags took a clear one hour and I spent another 20 mins declaring currency. I didn’t want to take a chance on my first trip, I think I’ve watched the good cop bad cop routine one too many time’s on TV and the mental image of being interrogated, steered my way to honesty is the best policy. Vikram Nehru is a wonderful person. He patiently waited for an hour and half and still managed to greet me cheerfully. Dad he said I look exactly like you when you were back in school and he remembers you very clearly. Especially about you being a mini bullet, your sprinting days are not forgotten. He has a lovely home in Maryland which is very close to downtown DC. AU is only 6 or so miles away. The house is large and very extensive. I’m still not sure of how many bedrooms there are. They’ve given me a small room at a lower level or basement with a bed and it is extremely comfortable. His wife Anu, is also a lovely person and together they make a very hospitable and caring couple. Her family hails from Hyderabad and her mother currently lives with them. I believe they are

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Reddy’s. I spent the evening talking to her mother and the Telugu connection always seems to work. Aunty is a fantastic Bharathanatyam dancer and she teaches and performs on a large scale. They have 2 sons. The eldest is doing an MBA in Columbia NY and the younger is the peace corps in Peru. Today, Aunty drove me down to that Room we had shortlisted. While the room and land lady seem okay, the commute is a bit challenging. I was hoping to take the free AU shuttle, but only the DC metro bus is accessible, adding to the extra cost on top of $900. Since it was the only place I saw, I’m planning to check out a couple more on my own tomorrow. There is a bus stop just outside their place which will take me to the metro rail station from where I will be able to commute easily to Campus and scout the area. Since Harsha is in Sterling VA which is about 26-29 miles away, it made more sense for me to commute from here and catch up with him tomorrow evening. Will keep you posted on my housing situation by the end of tomorrow. I’m hoping that something comes through, although I do have an appointment to see another promising place on Saturday. Mom I miss you like hell. Please take care of yourself and concentrate on losing some weight. Remember our deal. Dad hope something on the land comes through, will keep you busy now that I’m away! Akka - remember our talks. Ruks - was really wishing you were here, will count the days till u guys are back. Bhavs - thanks for all the help and support! and lastly Viraj Krish Tummala - Please don’t trouble your mummy, be a good boy and study hard! All my love, Venkat -Venkat Raj +91 98410 – 98589 From: abheet pillai Date: Fri, Dec 23, 2016 at 5:15 PM Subject: Fwd: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! To: Gopinath Sg From: “Venkat Raj” Date: 13 June 2006 at 10:22:31 AM IST To: venkatraj.sg Cc: bunty_bapu, haransingh, “abheet pillai” , “ashwin sreekumar” , “Sharan Rao” , “Shivan Ramachandran” , “varun rao” , venkatsanjivd, vigneshbhasker, “sneha rk” , “anirudh rajagopal” , “amrit c” , “Anna Maria Holbein” >, “Ameet Mirpuri” >, “Bendl, Florian” , ballerina_plo “bhavya srinivasan” , “AliYa .” , “dhanya ...” , flowwiththeflo, fattikutti, helgadraxler6, “Hersh Kumbhani” , joshi_sanjeev, khushnum_k “Katie D’Souza” , “meera singhvi”, madhulika83 “nandini naik” “Nadia Kjelsmark” , “Namgay Wangchuk” , nigsbrat, “Nishad Jayasundara” , “Neha Verma” , nadios,

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nadiacassam, ndalmia, nehakochharil, o.gormalova, “pooja khemka” , “Rahul Iyer” , rohit_1801, “Shikha Sethi” , “Subir Goradia” , “Tara Kakumanu” , tara_varma, t_ jagwani, vtornadoes, vivekshah, dulquer Subject: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M AN UNCLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ladies and Gentleman... My sister just gave birth to a beautiful baby boy!! I thought id take this moment to share it all with u... I cant start to tell u what it feels like... Its crazy!!!! I have no words to express what i feel right now.

Messages of love and condolence from friends – Kogod School of Business From: Meredith Kirchheimer Date: Wed, Dec 30, 2015 at 8:54 PM Subject: Remembering Venkat Dear Mr. and Mrs. Gopinath, In processing the devastating news over the past few days, I have learned that absolutely no words can make sense of this tragic situation... I am so very, very sorry for your heart-breaking loss. I have been praying for you, your family, and Venkat at all hours of the day since learning of the horrible news. I cannot begin to tell you how much Venkat meant and will always mean to me. He filled a part of my heart I will never be able to replace and for that I am both so very grateful and so very heartbroken. I have so many stories I want to share with you about the hundreds of ways I observed how thoughtful, charismatic, hilarious, genuine, and empathetic he was to anyone he crossed paths with - and I know others must be sharing many similar, meaningful stories and memories of the incredible impact he left on almost everyone he met or interacted with around the world. My bond with Venkat began when we both decided to take the graduate course in China in 2012. I had only known him for about a week, but at one point during the trip I was having a particularly bad day (which happened to be my birthday) and being the emotional girl I am, I likely overreacted and started crying later in the evening. Without missing a beat, Venkat not only went out of his way to console me, listen to what was bothering me, and then offer such sweet and caring advice -- but he also bought me some “cake pops” and sweets to try to cheer me up. It blew my mind that someone who had known me for nearly no time at all could so easily lift my spirits and make me feel so cared about. From that point on I felt an incredible connection with Venkat and so deeply cherished a friendship that, in hindsight, came with spectacular ease. We became very close while living in Washington, D.C., and, just as he had in China, he frequently listened to my “sagas” (whether it be job related, family related, dating related, and everything in between) and always offered a wonderful perspective and thoughtful feedback - that is so hard to find. We celebrated several birthdays together, went on apple picking adventures and to soccer games, we

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shared great meals and introduced each other to our friends. He took great care of me whenever I needed it, and was there for me so often when I didn’t even realize I needed a friend. I was also always in awe of the love and pride he had when speaking about you both and his family. He felt so blessed to have your unwavering love and support, and two incredibly strong and accomplished sisters. His face lit up so wonderfully when speaking about his niece and nephew—he was so excited for me when he learned I am about to be an aunt and offered all of his “great wisdom” from his experience as an uncle. You inspired him to be an incredible gentleman, encouraged him to constantly strive for more both academically and in the workplace, and surrounded him with so much love that was clear from the never ending, wonderful stories of his childhood that he shared. I know the void, and pain his loss is causing for your family can never be remedied, but I hope you may find a bit of solace in knowing what an incredible human he was, what a positive impact he left on so many people around the world, and how deeply he lived his life. The memories and love he gave me, and all of his friends, is so irreplaceable and I will be eternally thankful that our paths crossed. He will always be the most inspiring person I’ve ever met, and I will carry around his wonderful heart and memory everywhere I go. Thank you so very much for sharing your wonderful son with all of us. You will remain in my deepest thoughts and prayers during this incredibly trying time. Please let me know if there is anything I can do. Sincerely, Meredith Kirchheimer From: Meredith Kirchheimer Date: Wed, Aug 15, 2018 at 7:16 AM Subject: Re: Venkat Thank you so much for sharing this with us. I’ll never forget what a special night it was to celebrate Venkat’s 30th. I’m sending all my love to you and your family on his birthday. I know he’d be insisting we all have a drink for him and to focus on all of the happy memories we shared - though we miss him dearly. You and your family are always in my thoughts and prayers. I hope to see you soon! Always, Meredith On Aug 15, 2017 08:36, “Meredith Kirchheimer”wrote: Thinking of you and your family today, on Venkat’s birthday. My heart is aching that we can’t celebrate with him here but I know he is with you in spirit. These are photos from a Cirque du Soleil show (Totem) we went to around his birthday a few years ago. I’m so grateful to have photos from all of these special moments I shared with your son! I hope to see you soon and will be thinking of you all during this weekend’s celebration. Sincerely, Meredith

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From: Venkat Raj Date: Thu, Aug 23, 2012 at 12:55 AM Subject: Re: Cirque! To: Meredith haha! these pics are awesome! Thank you for taking me to see my first cirque :) it was so much fun! Have an awesome trip back home, I know ure gonna dread coming back, but we’ll hang out at take ure mind off it! p.s - I’m sorry for the trouble of having to pick me up and drop me back!

From: Timothy Richards Date: Sun, Jun 7, 2020 at 11:26 PM Subject: Re: Memoirs- S.G.Venkatraj and family I hope you and the family are well. It has definitely been a long few months. Unlike Venkat, I am not a great story teller but there is something that came to mind when I read this note and it seems particularly fitting with everything going on around DC and the world over the last few weeks: Venkat was remarkably optimistic. Sometimes I can be quick to worry or make a judgment about something and in bringing up matters like this with him he was always a voice of reason to point out the positive in a situation. He was a great mediator and very considerate of those around him. Sometimes when I get stressed or find myself taking a negative outlook I’ll see the clock engraved with his name on my counter and he helps me remember what is important. I’ll always be grateful to keep that part of him with me. My best and take care, Tim

From: Lina Rojas Date: Thu, Sep 7, 2017 at 7:49 PM Subject: Hello and Thank you Thank you so much for inviting and letting me be part of Venkat’s celebration. If you don’t mind, could I have your address in India? I would love to stay in touch. I am eternally grateful with Venkat not only because he was a caring friend, but also because he taught me to not wait to tell someone how much you love them and how much you care about them. Many thanks again and God bless you. Lots of love, Lina Rojas

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From: Lina Rojas Date: Sat, Dec 22, 2018 at 9:00 AM Please send my kind regards to your family. Always keeping Venkat’s memories close to my heart. I take this opportunity to send my best wishes for a happy and blessed New Year! Lina Rojas

From: erin monahan Date: Mon, Dec 28, 2015 at 10:33 AM Subject: A Note for Venkat’s Family Dear Venkat’s Family, Venkat was a very good friend of mine, and I am terribly saddened to hear the news. I met Venkat my first year at American University, and we quickly became friends. He was incredibly caring, and was always there to lend a listening ear and offer helpful advice. Even after he moved to San Francisco, I would see him on visits to DC and we would talk frequently on gchat. He was always checking in to make sure that I was happy and doing well, and I knew that he was rooting for me to succeed in all of my endeavors, both career and life, because of these check-ins. I will miss him incredibly in the years that follow, but am eternally grateful to have had him in my life and for the wonderful memories. I wanted to write and let you know what a positive impact he had on my life as well as on the lives of my fellow classmates at AU. He was a bright, kind, and caring person, whose opinion I valued greatly and whose friendship I cherished. My thoughts and prayers are with each of you during this difficult time. Erin Monahan From: erin monahan Date: Sat, Dec 22, 2018 at 9:43 AM Thinking of Venkat and your family today from dc! I miss him as well :). Love to all of you this holiday season! Erin From: Andrew Boutros Date: Sat, Jun 13, 2020 at 11:54 PM Subject: Re: Memoirs- S.G.Venkatraj and family Hey Gopinath, Hope you and the family are doing well. I am sorry for taking so long to write a response. Truth be told, I was struggling to write something, because I knew it would reopen up a lot of pain and I am sorry for that.

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I know you wanted a couple of pictures and anecdotes to use for his time at school, however I wanted to send you and your family a more personal message of how much your son meant to me as a friend. Throughout my entire life I have always kept my feelings guarded. Even though I am characterized as an extrovert, I was (sometimes still am) afraid of being vulnerable. I can count one hand the amount of people that I am comfortable being open with, and Venkat was one of them. We met during the MBA program, and I was a year ahead of him. We met at a post MBA event and became immediate friends. We would spend hours with a bottle of scotch talking about life, girls, relationships, family, career, fears, goals, etc. We were very close friends. Eventually I moved to Boston, and Venkat moved to the west coast. Even though we didn’t see each other or speak as often, when we reconnected it was as if nothing changed. Looking back on it, we never really did small talk… We only reached out to each other when we knew we had enough time to catch up properly to talk about life. We wanted to give each other that time and respect to listen and talk about what’s going on. Even now during times of chaos, and there is a moment to think or catch up I still think, “Man... It would be great to talk to Venkat.” During this quarantine, I know he and I would have FaceTimed, grabbed a bottle of scotch and then reverted back to our old ways. In today’s world you see so much hate, prejudice, and bigotry. In these troubling times I think about how this world could use more kind, patient, and compassionate people like your son. You truly raised an amazing person and I miss him all the time. He was one of my closest friends. I miss our conversations, jokes, laughs.. everything. I am forever grateful that I got to see him in Iceland for a few days. We were basically snowed in the capital of Reykjavik. All of the plans of hiking, outdoor trips, and seeing the northern lights went out the window haha. He and I still made the most of it, by exploring the city as much as we could. That trip will always have a special place for me. Hopefully when this quarantine ends, we can travel and reconnect again. Talk to you soon. Please give the family my best. Love, Andrew

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Messages of love and condolence from friends at Landor, Venkat’s company in San Francisco, California From: Laura Frank Date: Tue, Jun 21, 2016 at 10:20 AM Subject: So nice to meet you It was so so so very lovely to meet you yesterday in San Francisco. I cannot begin to explain how special our conversation was, and I am so grateful that you could make time to meet me. When we parted I felt like I hadn’t told you enough about what a wonderful friend Venkat was to me. I think after our discovery of a common connection, though distant, in Madras, Venkat and I were quickly friends. Once he discovered my love for Bollywood, he began recommending movies left and right. It was awesome! Tonight I flipped through my journal to find when I had written about his passing. I will admit to you, it took me a few months to write anything down. I was so sad. I made a list of things that I liked most about him, and I’d like to share just a couple of them with you: • I liked his big, generous laugh. • I liked the way he smelled and always told him that - he smelled so clean and like fresh, crisp laundry. • I liked the way he said “cool.” Like... “koo-el” • I liked that despite being different than me in just about every way on the surface, I knew he was one of “us”: one of the people I just instantly connect with, and have an understanding about life with. What I know about your son is that he was so very loved. He talked about your family all the time - he missed and loved you both so tremendously. And his sisters so tremendously (he was so excited to surprise the sister in Hyderabad, as I mentioned yesterday!). I cannot imagine how you and your family are dealing with the sadness of losing such a kind and caring son. Please know that by extension, you always have family wherever I might be in the world. I mentioned the 10-year Indian visa I have, so I will undoubtedly use it at some point in the next couple of years. I will make a point to come see you all. Thank you for making me a part of your trip. I will cherish it forever and ever. If you find a spare Venkat mug around, I would absolutely love it. My mailbox is tiny, so it would have to be sent to my work (address below). If you have questions for me about anything, or ever need anything please do not hesitate to get in touch. I hope you’re able to find comfort with your extended family in New Mexico and Virginia and Monterey. I’ll be thinking of you, and of course Venkat, here in San Francisco! My very best, Laura Frank San Francisco, CA 94104

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From: lauraefrank Date: Tue, Aug 16, 2016 at 2:27 AM Subject: Thinking of you today To: gopinath.sg Think of you today on Venkat’s birthday. A jock story to share that hopefully makes you smile! I am on vacation right now in Ireland, trying to trace some family history. I got in midday Saturday and my host wasn’t available until 4. With time to kill I started to wander and eventually came across the Guinness brewery here in Dublin. It is seven very large floors. One of the floors was dedicated to branding and advertising. I watched some of the 1960s and 1970s commercials, then came to more current commercials. I was watching the below when suddenly the man spoke the last two lines of the commercial - I was struck right away thinking “ahh! Venkat is here with me!!” It definitely caught me off guard but it also made me laugh a little to myself. Like he was telling me to hurry up and go get the beer that comes with admission! https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=66HuFrMZWMo Anyway. Today was hard for you, I know. Just know there are many of us all over the world thinking about your wonderful son today! With love, Laura From: Laura Frank Date: Wed, Aug 15, 2018 at 10:07 PM Subject: Re: Venkat Hi Gopinath! So wonderful to get this lovely video, thank you for sharing it with all of us! Today is the 15th here in the US so I waited to use the attached until this morning. I’m thinking of you and your family and missing Venkat so much today! From: Laura Frank Date: Sun, Dec 23, 2018 at 1:18 AM Subject: Re: Venkat Hi Gopi, I am thinking of your family and sending lots of I’ve from Amsterdam, we I relocated to a couple months ago. Thank you for including me on this email. Please continue to stay in touch and know that I think of you all and Venkat often. Laura

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From: Hillery Kemp Date: Friday, December 25, 2015 Subject: Hillery contact To: rukminigopinath Hi again Rukmini - thank you again for calling me just now. I just left Bob Kersten (415.341.3956) a message letting him know you would be calling him soon. My heart and thoughts are with you and your family right now. Words cannot express the loss. Attached are a few pictures of Venkat and I over Halloween in San Diego. He had a wonderful time enjoying the warmer weather and beach. I tell people we had kindred spirits - shared a lot of the same interests and the same favorite movie. He just sent me a copy of River God, his favorite book. I will be in touch Rukmini - please take care. Hillery Date: Mon, Aug 15, 2016 at 9:47 PM Subject: Re: Venkat To: Gopinath Sg Greetings Hoping you made it back to Chennai safely. My thoughts and emotions are with you today. I enjoyed a glass of Hibiki whiskey over the weekend in Venkat’s honor - he really enjoyed this kind of Whiskey. Talk to you soon and take care. Hillery

From: Hillery Kemp Date: Thu, Aug 16, 2018 at 2:56 AM Subject: Re: Venkat Thank you so much for this beautiful video Gopinath. Thinking of Venkat today back in the states...will have a toast to him this evening. Sending you so much love and strength. Keep in touch and be well. Best, Hillery

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On Wed, Jan 6, 2016 at 12:28 AM, Floyd, Karen wrote: Mr. Gopinath, I speak for all of Landor when I express our sincere sympathies on the loss of your son. Anyone who worked with Venkat knew that they were with a special man. He was well-respected by employees and clients, and we all miss him terribly. I am introducing you on this email to Chris Lehmann, the Managing Director of the San Francisco office. Chris is putting together a more formal letter that captures Venkat’s many contributions to Landor and how much his colleagues appreciated the opportunity to be able to work with him. He was a great colleague and friend to many. We will continue to be in touch. With our best regards, Karen. Karen Floyd HR Director North America Landor 110 Shillito Place|Cincinnati, Ohio 45202 United States +513-419-2379 landor.com | Karen.Floyd@landor.com Winner of five Cannes Lions 2015 From: “Lehmann, Christopher” Date: 13 Jan 2016 04:21 Subject: Re: Landor Cc: “Floyd, Karen” Mr. Gopinath, I am writing to you to provide, per your request below, a testimonial of Venkat’s services at Landor. I apologize that this took longer than I anticipated, but I wanted to devote enough time to capture important details. I also collected for you a range of remembrances from Venkat’s colleagues here in the San Francisco office. Please see attached. I will also FedEx to you a hard copy of this letter for your records. I hope that at least in a small way, this letter brings you and your family some closure regarding Venkat’s career at Landor. As you’ll read, he was highly respected, greatly admired and even loved. He meant much to us and will continue to inspire and guide us through the example he set every day. My thoughts are with you and your family. In memory of Venkat always, Christopher Lehmann Managing Director Landor

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Agastalin Koil Bose, Colleague from William Lea (UK), Chennai One Charming young man One who is nice to know One who showered love One who showed impeccable character One who is Intelligent One who is Competent One who stole our hearts One who carried hundred dreams One who was born in one end of the world And found success at the other end of the world My dear friend Why did you rush To embrace death so soon Shattering our hearts. An intelligent and smart young man. That is the first impression I got when I met Venkat for the first time in William Lea. 2006 is the year. There began a nice friendship. Being a small team of 6 people made it easier to know Venkat a bit more easier. A little casual in his approach in the early days at Williams Lea, he soon turned out to be the most responsible and organised person in the team. Clients and colleagues from UK started loving him. He was the first one from our team to travel to UK and the kind of impact he created there was tremendous. Chennai team started reaping the benefits of that visit in terms of work getting doubled and tripled soon. That was the base on which the creative team in Williams Lea has grown to be a 500 member one now. He stole the hearts of the colleagues in Chennai team with his simplicity and by treating everyone equally. Out of office, Venkat was a person who was loving, kind hearted, humorous and who loved socialising. When I was thinking about going on my own, Venkat was one of the people whom I wanted to be a partner in the organisation. We met in Nungambakkam to discuss about this. One of the dreams of Venkat was to produce movies and we discussed about how he can look at taking this forward by being a partner. The love of theatre was so strong that he was clear that he will do this few years later definitely and soon he moved to USA to study MBA. I always thought he will come back to Chennai and get into the movie industry even if he doesn’t become a partner to me. It turned out God had other plans for him. He will always remain in the hearts of people whom he touched during his stay in earth. And I hope one day I will be able to take forward one of his dream and make it a reality. Stalin

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From: Shikha Sethi Date: Thu, Dec 31, 2015 at 1:53 PM Subject: Hello To: gopinath.sg Dear Uncle and Aunty, I heard the news about Venkat, and wanted to write to you and share how sorry I am. Venkat was a dear friend from UWC (he was a year senior to me), and we shared many happy times together on the hill. He had a wonderful sense of humour, and life, and directed it to helping everyone along his path in need of it. I miss his easy ability to make me laugh, and to lift our spirits. He was a good listener and a kind friend. Which is why he always drew people to him so effortlessly. The world is a much more cheerless place without him. I know there is little that can dull the pain right now, but you are all in my prayers. All of us who knew him miss him and wish he was here with us. If there is anything at all that I can do, please let me know.

Lots of love, Shikha Sethi

From: Rukmini Gopinath Date: Fri, Jan 1, 2016 at 11:38 PM Subject: Fwd: Hello To: Dad Cell ---------- Forwarded message ---------From: “Shikha Sethi” < Date: Dec 31, 2015 2:46 AM Subject: Hello Dear Rukmini, We’ve never met, but I’m a friend of Venkat’s from UWC. He was my senior in Pune, and a great friend. I’m writing to say how terribly sorry I am. Venkat was a good friend, with a wonderful sense of humour -- someone you could always count on to cheer you up. We’d lost touch for a while after UWC, but I saw him last year in Bombay when he’d come down for Nandini’s wedding. In fact, I met him right before he took a flight to see you in Hyderabad. We’d been talking on GChat for the last year when he was in SF. The older we grow, the less life makes sense at certain times. This is one of those times. I’m sorry for the tremendous pain that you and your parents are going through. Just wanted you to know that your loss is shared by all of us who care about Venkat and knew him. He brightened our lives. Heaven just got a little cooler and funnier. I am on 9833079475. If you ever feel like talking, please do call or message. I would like that very much. Hugs, Shikha

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From: Anaitha Nair Date: Mon, Feb 15, 2016 at 8:47 PM Subject: Love and condolences To: gopinath.sg Dearest Uncle and Aunty, I have never met either of you and have met Venkat just once at Abheet’s wedding but felt compelled to write to you after my father-in -law forwarded me your note of closure. I’m married to Akhil who has never wasted an opportunity to inform me of the friends that are dearest to him, Venkat being high on that list. Stories about your son’s warmth, love and loyalty to his friendship with Akhil were heartwarming for me to know that Akhil had someone like that as part of his life. Your note was so hard for me to read, I can’t even imagine how many times you must have broken down writing it. Akhil and I recently became parents to a little girl who is now two and as much as losing a loved one is painful, losing a child has got to be the most painful of them all. Aaliya’s every achievement as tiny as they are send us into a tizzy of pride, you must be so so so proud for all that Venkat achieved through his life... that was a lot for a 30 year old young man to have done and experienced in his short life. I just had to reach out to you both, not that I could be of any help but just to tell you how sorry I am for your loss and that you couldn’t have drawn a better picture of Venkat for everyone who knew him through that note. With all my love, Anaitha From: Kabir Agarwal agarwal Date: Wed, Jun 10, 2020 at 6:30 PM Subject: Venkat the Amazing Hi Uncle, I was forwarded your message from Hersh, and wanted to pen down a few thoughts as requested. Venkat was more than a friend; he was like a brother. Starting our friendship at UWC and through us hanging out in New York and me staying with him in San Francisco, we always shared a cherished relationship. There are so many anecdotes and stories, making it hard to pen down just one. So I will just share moments that we spent together. One in particular which forged our friendship, was a project week at UWC, where both of us were asked to stay back because of our lack of academic prowess (possibly from our common love for being lazy), we spent all week attempting to study and sitting in the wada talking about everything under the sun. Here I realised Venkat was a friend for life, as he found intelligent humour in most conversations. Then throw in New York when he stayed with me and we shared New Years together rejoicing the night, to the week we spent at his place in San Francisco, where while at work he made enough time to spare to be part of my experience. Every moment I shared with him was engaging and with moments of humour. He had the unique ability to find joy in most of life’s moments. I wish you and your family the best, and hope you are all keeping safe. Venkat will always be in my heart. Sending you and the family love. Kabir Agarwal

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From: Viju Parameshwar Date: Wed, Dec 30, 2015 at 12:26 PM Subject: My condolences To: gopinath.sg Dear Gopi, I am very sorry to hear about your bereavement. It is really sad to loses one’s child - I cannot imagine what you and your wife feel. My daughters knew your son from UWC too. Love and best Viju Parameshwar From: sneha shinde Date: Mon, Jan 11,2016 at 11.19 To: gopinath.sg Dear Mr.Gopinath Venkat went to school with me both in Mahindra UWC and also at American University. It happened to be a coincidence that I was also at American with him. He was such a great man, he was so warm and so caring. Venkat even offered to help me move about 15 heavy boxes to my apartment in DC.He made me feel included in his group of friends. He touched so many hearts and I can’t express how much, how many people admired him at American University. He will always live in our memories. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Please let me know if I can do anything for you. Sneha Nilofer Cassam On Wed, Jul 22, 2020 at 1:17 PM nilofer cassam wrote: Hi Uncle Hope you and aunty are well and keeping safe! And will love to see you both on my next trip to Chennai. Thank you for including me in your memoir of Venkat. There is not a day that goes by that I don’t miss him and our beautiful friendship. I wrote a short memoir. Happy to add more. I didn’t know how much you needed. Let me know if it’s fine. Love Nilofer Veeee!!! There are no words that can describe the friendship we shared— Venkat was my best buddy, my confidante and my person! We shared a bond that people take a lifetime to cultivate. What started as teenagers on top of a magical hill was a journey that involved immense laughter, movies, mindless chatter, heartfelt turbulences, and all the childish

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rollercoasters of two best friends. One memory that stands out is our days at the infamous Gymkhana club which was just like our space- we had our own Nilly-Vee’s table with chilli chicken dry, club sandwiches around 4:30 pm where we felt like incognitos amidst the many club goers. It felt like our safe haven, where we grew up as kids together and then adults- it captured a lot time spent. Speaking to Venkat wherever I was in the world transported me to ‘home away from home’! I truly miss my best friend and love him dearly... From: Nandini Naik Date: Wed, Jun 10, 2020 at 6:30 PM Subject: Venkat I’ve been thinking about what to write and weather for the book or just for you, I’d say: “We don’t always remember exactly what someone who we lost said...but we do remember how they made us feel. Venky made me fell loved, heard and respected. He was deeply curious and kind and witty. In Ghana they say no one is lost till they are forgotten. He shines like a bright star in my memories. Working with him together on Hayavadana I remember how deeply committed he was to the play, how receptive he was to feedback on acting - always seeking to embody the character more honestly - and and how he effortlessly captured the whole audiences’ attention and heart. Making the effort to come to Bombay from SF for my wedding in December 2014 meant the world to me. To have his vibrant energy fill the space and those days with so much joy was magic and I’m so grateful to my dear friend Venky. He had the power to galvanise those around him, and while he’s no more in physical presence, I still feel moved by him.”

Xaan Chacko, Nandini Naik and her husband came home to pay their condolences

His best friend - Abeet “ Pillai”—Loyola College, Chennai ‘You must meet my friend Venkat, both of you will really get along’ said a friend of ours, this was the first time I heard of Venkat. I had just moved to Chennai and joined Loyola College and hardly knew anyone. Venkat and me were just destined to be friends. We immediately hit it off and as luck would have it when my mother moved to Chennai we ended up living literally a stone’s throw away from Venkats folks place. We used to drive to college together and I don’t think a day went by when both of us wouldn’t be hanging out. Venkat was so much more than a friend to me, we were more like brothers and at the risk of sounding clichéd we used to call each other brothers from another mother!! It’s safe to say that our mothers became really good friends and had each other on speed dial because of us. Every weekend (more like every other night) they would be calling each other early morning checking to see if the other had heard from her son. This part of the story I save for when I’m having a drink with Gopi Uncle.

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Venkat was someone you could rely on for anything, you knew the guy would always come through. We were in the theatre society together and in our final year I remember Venkat decided to take a break from acting to focus on his academics. That year I was the president of the theatre society and there was an altercation that had happened and we needed someone to play a major role in the play. I just knew that Venkat had to do this role, also we didn’t have the luxury of time to start auditioning again. I met Venkat that evening and told him the entire story, I know for a fact that he had a lot of pressure from home not to get back into theatre but he called me later that night and said I got you bro, I’ll do the part! That was it, the next day he was at theatre practise but he never spoke about what he had to handle at home. Since the time that I knew him it had always been his dream to go study and start a career in the US and then eventually come back home and get started on his own business. He never ever let go of that dream. After college he worked a couple of jobs which people often questioned him about as they didn’t seem to be leading him anywhere. He never let that deter him. He knew that he just needed the work experience to get him into the top colleges abroad. Soon enough he gave everyone the news that he got accepted into one of the most reputed Universities in the US. He was a fighter, he never gave up. To top it off he was chosen amongst his entire batch of students to speak at the Valedictorian ceremony. I think getting into University on his own and finally giving the speech and standing out amongst all his compatriots was a turning point in the relationship he had with Gopi Uncle. It was from here onwards that they began to become buddies, started talking to each other and opening up more. I might be wrong and Uncle could correct me and edit this out but I certainly felt these were important milestones in their relationship. Uncle saw him in a new light, saw him for the self-made, confident, independent and successful young man that he had become. Venkat loved his family, he was thrilled to be in the US because now he was close to Ruku. Whenever he could get time off work he would go spend time with them. He was elated at becoming an Uncle for the second time, I remember him sending me a photo and him saying bro I’m overwhelmed. As soon as he got a job he called Uncle and Aunty out to the US, I remember talking to him and he giving me the details on the elaborate plans he had made, wine tasting, renting a car and driving out to the valley, taking Uncle and Aunty out to his favourite eating joints. He was super excited and from the photos I saw his parents were super proud. He really looked forward to coming home, he would ensure he made time for everyone. He would absolutely love going to Hyderabad and surprising Rohini and Viraj. The shriek he would get out Rohini would almost always be the highlight of all the trips he made home. He would record it and keep watching it on repeat feeling extremely proud. He absolutely adored Viraj. He would constantly keep saying that Viraj is exactly what and who he used to be. Also if you look at their pictures it is actually uncanny how alike they look. What he missed the most though was Beena aunty’s cooking. Food for Venkat has always been very high on the list of the finer things of life. He couldn’t wait to get home to start digging into the elaborate spread aunty had been planning ever since Venkat would let everyone know of his leave plans. I think he appreciated it so much more because now he was also cooking for himself back in San Francisco. I also specifically remember one time when I had moved out of Chennai but my mom and sister were still living there Venkat bumped into my sister and told her don’t ever forget that you still have brother while I’m around. When it was time for me to get married I told Venkat that he had to be there as my Best Man, I didn’t care whether he flew, swam or ran across the world. He didn’t get his leave approved till the very last minute and I clearly remember he had to change about three or four flights and was traveling for over 36hrs to make it for the wedding. It was Christmas season and all airlines were sold out but like I said before you knew he would always

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come through. When my wife was visiting San Francisco Venkat cleared his entire day to show her around. They hung out the entire day and all this when whilst he had a torn ligament in his knee. They took a picture which is one of the pictures that I cherish the most. Finally, what story of Venkat and my time together would be complete without even talking about the ‘Blue Devil’!!! I will never forget that number 0696….Venkats blue Zen. The stories that that car could tell. Although we always called her the Blue Devil we knew that our lives have been saved more than a few times because of that car, don’t ask me how but it’s the truth. We were 18 year olds studying in a boy’s college, absolutely no distractions so all our focus was on trying all the different alcohols that the world had to offer (of course limited by what little pocket money we used to get). Both of us used to car pool, one week his car and one week mine and we knew exactly how much fuel we needed to get us from place A to place B. Exactly that precise amount of fuel would be filled and the spare cash was kept aside until we had accumulated enough to buy some hooch. We just needed a reason to party, oh a cloudy day. Good weather let’s get some beers…oh its mad hot today = perfect weather for some nice chilled beers, you get the drift. Another interesting thing about Venkat was that after a few drinks is when his British accent would pop up from somewhere and trust me suddenly he would have the attention of all the ladies much to the chagrin of all the other gentlemen around. Although the flip side to this was that the British accent would also bring to fore his absolute love for hard-core desi Bollywood music, so you would have this guy oozing charm talking to the ladies in his crisp English and then suddenly he would break into these proper Bollywood steps. Like he would say from Directors Special Black to Single Malt, we had come a long way together. Ever since we became friends Venkat has always been a very important part of my life. He would know about everything that was going on in my life. If I hadn’t told him about it, it didn’t feel like it had actually happened ( I don’t even know if that makes sense ). Venkat may not be here today but he is still always walking beside me!!! Keep walking brother…..

Friends from Sishya From: Karun Chandhok Date: Tue, Jan 19, 2016 at 2:30 AM Subject: Condolences Dear Gopi uncle, I can’t tell you how shocked and sorry we all are to hear of Venkat’s passing. Having spent many years as classmates and friends it’s still hard to believe that something like this could happen to him. The fun nights where we all stayed together at each other’s houses as kids will always be something I remember. I must also tell you that there have been plenty of our former Sishya school mates exchanging stories and happy memories of Venkat and we will all miss him dearly.

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Please do accept my sincere condolences to you and Beena aunty as well as your daughters at this time. Deepest sympathies, Karun. M: +44 www.karunchandhok.com From: Shrav Gummadi Date: Thu, Jan 7, 2016 at 1:57 AM Subject: Thoughts for Venkat Dear Uncle and Aunty, I have been trying to find the right words to offer you some solace in this terrible time but I have been hard pressed to find the right ones. I am so sorry for waiting so long to write but I have not been brave enough to try to offer comfort when I have found it so hard to find comfort myself. Venkat was one of my most favorite people from school, he helped me find my childhood love and he became an integral part of my life after that. We always kept in touch over the years no matter the distance and he was always such a larger than life person. He had a quirky sense of humor and never shied away from doing fun new things. He always had a large group of friends surrounding him and I will never forget what a sensitive and kind soul he was. We shared a magical night in London once that I will always carry with me for the rest of my life. I hope you know that your son affected so many many people around the world and he is loved from near and far. They say the good go first for a reason, whatever force is out there saw him as one of the good ones because that’s what he was. I know no words can assuage your pain in this dark time but I wanted to send you all my love and let you know that I haven’t spent a single day these past 2 week not thinking of my dear friend. I am Venkat’s classmate from Sishya and Rama’s daughter. Affectionately. Shravanthi From: Shravanthi Gummadi (Shrav) Date: Tue, Aug 15, 2017 at 2:03 AM Subject: Sending you love Hi Uncle, Wanted to send you some love and positivity today. His big beautiful smile is still ingrained in my mind. I think of him at the most random moments. There are moments when I just say hi whats up and imagine that chuckle of his. He was always so easy to talk to. Hope you are all doing well. Lots of love Shravanthi

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From: Rahul Iyer Date: Thu, Jun 11, 2020 at 12:28 PM Subject: Re: Memoirs- S.G.Venkatraj and family Hi Uncle, Venkat was very outgoing and got along with anyone. He played sports, danced at parties, sang and enjoyed a good laugh. He enjoyed having fun, being happy and winning at sports. He was always cheerful and seemed to be having a good time - the only times I saw him serious were when we were having a fight related to whether someone was out (when playing cricket) or not, or in basketball, when the game was getting competitive. He used to sing and dance, and had many good friends. He spoke well, and because of his outgoing nature, he was cast in the lead role of of our school plays. Plays: Venkat got the lead role in school plays. I remember him both being cast as Romany Roff, and Antonio in Merchant of Venice. He also used to be good at speaking, and enjoyed making witty comments. He was a fun and interesting speaker Sports: Cricket: Everyday after school we used to play cricket at either my home, on the terrace, or on the street in front of your garage. Terrace Cricket: I had a really big terrace. To prevent the ball from falling off the terrace and us having to retrieve it, we allowed only underarm bowling. The ball hitting the back wall was 4, if it hit it full toss, it was six, and if it fell off the balcony it was out. Any runs you ran were runs… Sometimes it was just two of us playing if we didn’t have enough people, but as there was a wall, we didn’t need a wicket keeper. These games were still very competitive. Garage Cricket: Before we discovered terrace cricket, we played garage cricket. Always in someones Garage Sanjays, Mine or Yours. Street Cricket: When we had enough people, we sometimes played cricket on the street in front of your garage. We had to have at least three people, since one person had to keep wicket… Basketball: Sometimes we played basketball instead of cricket. Either on my terrace or in front of your garage. This was mostly just two of us, and sometimes Sanjay. It was very competitive, and occasionally would result in fisticuffs. School Cricket: Venkat kept wicket in our A vs B (both sections of our class) matches. He also bowled right arm spin, and batted one or two down. School Football: Venkat was a goal keeper. Badminton: We all played badminton sometimes, but mostly it was cricket, football and basketball. Rarely Table Tennis. Video games: Growing up we played a lot of video games (connected to TV), and on the computer… He had a sense of humor! Many of us on the same street used to carpool: Venkat, Shilpa, Me, and Sharan…. It was also too hot and congested during assembly sometimes, so it was actually nice to be late and stand outside where it was nice and cool!! Depending on who was driving, that person would play music.

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Pop Guns: Sometimes, we made teams and used to chase each other around our houses or the neighborhood playing with guns. Diwali: We used to all burst firecrackers together, either on the street in our neighborhood or on someone’s terrace… Surprise Party: In 8th or 9th Standard, my family and friends organized a surprise Birthday party for me… It was a lot of fun. Venkat was always popular and used to dance at parties. It was a lot of fun. Venkat seemed to have a lot of dance moves and was the center of attention. After all the girls left, the rest of us remained behind and played terrace basketball. As Venkat and I were the home team, used to playing, we beat everyone! It was really great, and the most fun part of the party. Meeting Kapil Dev: At another birthday party of mine, a new student in our class Varun Priya Das / Varun Mahan (he changed his name at some point), told us Kapil Dev was visiting and we could meet him. After my birthday we all went to Varun’s house and met Kapil Dev. Each of us took a photo with him. We must have been very young - 12-13 maybe. I think we went to Varun house for Hindi tuition also. I don’t think we studied much, and mostly played WWF with each other Venkat Birthday Party / Sleepover: On Venkat’s Birthday after the party I stayed over at his house. Both of us were fans of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and shared comics, watched movies, drew turtles in class (both of us were the only two students regularly commended by our art teacher). On Venkat’s Birthday, his Mum made these Chocolate Balls, which both of us enjoyed. .. Camping: There used to be camping trips to Theosophical Society. No idea why, but it was basically a day or two of no sleep and goofing off. Cycling: Venkat, Sharan, Sanjay and Me regularly used to go cycling around our neighborhood. We would normally do a circuit between your house. Go right from your garage, take the first left, a left again, and then left down arundale beach road, ride down to my house and back…. They rest of the time we practiced performing stunts on our bikes in the street in front of your house. Other times we would cycle into that big empty field of that school, whose wall used to serve as the boundary for our cricket matches in front of your house. Fighting: Sports was very competitive. We would fight for every single point or run. One time on the basketball court Venkat and I were in opposing teams… World Cup Cricket Party: I forgot which World Cup, but there was a very important match, so we all met up at my house and watched it. I forgot who was playing, but we won and we had a blast watching it. All the guys in my class were there. It was a lot of fun for us. Summer Holidays / Spying: Briefly we went through a phase where we pretended we were secret agents or something. We both had binoculars. We would find some vantage point, and hide, and craft some storyline of subjects in our neighborhood that we were tracking. We also had walkie talkies and the combination was fun. This was during summer holidays, so it was really hot, but we still enjoyed being out tracking people and reporting.

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School: Morning before assembly: When we arrived in school, the first thing we would do is leave our bags in class (if we weren’t late), and all the guys in our class would discuss the previous evenings sporting event (India vs whoever in cricket, F1 racing, all kinds of things) . Then we would go for assembly. It was an enormous amount of fun. Till 10th standard, we were all just one big gang. Morning assembly: In morning assembly, they used to make us all line up in auditorium before singing hymns, morning prayer, followed by announcements. This was fun except for how hot it used to get when it was summer or humid. Sometimes someone would be in the Choir so instead of being in the line with their class, they would stand with the choir facing the rest of the school. At some point I think Venkat was in the choir. School Excursions: In the lower classes, we all used to go wherever we were going (Planetarium, St. Thomas mount) etc, in a group of cars. And it all used to be a race to get to wherever we were going first. In higher classes when we went out of station it was a lot of fun, because we went in a bus or train or whatever as one big gang. All of us liked singing, so whichever was the hit song at the time, would be played loudly and we would all be singing. Venkat enjoyed singing and a good joke and dancing. Dodging Projectiles: There was a teacher in Sishya - she used to get really angry when people didn’t do their homework. She would make people stand up in class, and depending on how high her blood pressure was, she would throw your book at you from across the room…Our class was one big gang, and any free moment was a chance to have a laugh and have fun.

From: Sharan Rao Date: Fri, Aug 14, 2020 at 5:13 PM Subject: My best friend, Venkat! To: gopinath.sg@gmail.com My best friend, Venkat! I really do not know where to begin from because both Venkat and I could never remember where it all started. Was it on Arundale Beach Road where we were neighbours, or was it at Sishya, the school we both studied at? We have discussed this several times but could never put a pin to it. Although I was a couple of years his senior at school, this never really changed anything between us. He always dealt with our friendship with utmost maturity and advised me through so many difficult situations with ease. For years we met every single day, I repeat every single day, as long as we both were in Madras. We’ve clocked a few hundred miles over the years cycling around our colony. We knew every single undulation on the streets of Kalakshetra. So much so that during the monsoons we made sure to ride into each one of them and dirty ourselves. As we grew a little older we ditched the cycle and created a cricket pitch for ourselves. Our wicket was an old tyre that was used as long as we played. Every afternoon from 4:30 to 6:30pm was match day. There was no invitation, no planning, no second thoughts. It was simply given. There was a lot of emotion involved in each match that was played. The neighbours in the area were a real patient lot dealing with two hours of a lot of noise! Venkat and I shared a lot with each other. By ‘a lot’ I mean just everything! All our highs and lows were shared rather instantly. When Venky (which he was called by me then) was studying at UWC in the late 90’s was also

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the time when the internet and Hotmail made its way to India. During his time there, there was one week when we exchanged emails on a daily basis and ended up becoming a competition of who put in more kilobytes into that text! It’s amazing how we had so many things to tell each other on a daily basis. Venky and I spoke of this a few times several years later and enjoyed the laughs. So as time went by, Venky became Venkyo. This stemmed because Hitler (what we fondly called Gopi Uncle, who is now a dear friend of mine) got a top notch home theatre system from Singapore which was called Onkyo. So Venkyo and I watched Formula 1 races, cricket matches and movies along with amazing meals cooked by Beena Aunty, but only when Hitler was not in town or at home. So close we were, that the entire family knew me including his grand-parents. It was the same the other way as well and he was such a good friend to my grandfather too! Venkyo (as his name is even stored on my phone until today) eventually became Venks! We had grown out of our adolescence and by now were separated because I moved out of Madras. This didn’t change much to the intensity of our friendship which continued the same as before although we spoke less often. But each time that we did, we shared like brothers. Ofcourse we had several bad arguments over the years with the ‘I am not going to talk to you ever again’ dialogue but that was never meant to last. On each of my visits to now Chennai, there was no going back without us meeting. Through all these years, Venks became friends with most of my friends from the city of varied age groups. He was much loved by everyone and always had an impact on his mates. Our bond was built to last. While there are several other moments which can be illustrated, I come to the last picture I have with Venks, which was on our cricket pitch on a December night in 2013, his last visit to India. This picture is memorable to me in more ways than one because firstly, that was such a fun night, secondly, we were not particularly sober for the first time on our cricket pitch and lastly, the picture included our family which had almost doubled! Infact on this very night Hitler changed to Gopi Uncle which Venks and I spoke about. Such a good soul with a futuristic thought —he ensured the change! I will never know the pain of Gopi Uncle, Beena Aunty, Ro and Ruku, but for me, Venks is always around and continues to watch over me, guide me, like he always did. I deeply miss our conversations and hangouts, now remain to cherish each moment spent with him by myself. To my best friend and brother, Shari

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Others James Gasho Date: Mon, Mar 21, 2016 at 5:44 AM Subject: Venkat To: gopinath.sg I am so sorry to hear this news. Young people have so much to offer. We are not meant to outlive our children. My heart goes out to you. Jim Gasho

Jim was Venkat’s choice of surgeon for an ACL tear he got in an exhibition match between Kogod and Darden (UVA), Charlotesville. Venkat suffered excruciating pain and Rukmini took care of him in Charlottesville until he was able to walk. Took him a good 8 months for normalcy. Venkat gave his valedictorian address at his commencement ceremony holding a crutch. Jim was such an admirable and inspiring doctor recommended by my friend, Vikram Nehru. From: Sudhir Syal Date: Mon, Dec 7, 2020 at 5:45 PM Subject: Re: Venkat Raj - Tribute Venkat was my first golfing buddy and friend, larger then life laughter and an extremely talented sportsman across cricket and golf; Venkat was a joy to be with for every moment. Fondest memory with Venkat was when he borrowed my cousin’s new golf driver to hit a ball of the Kodai cliff and instead of the ball it was the club that ended up going down. I saved him one by bringing the club up from the cliff that day but having said that they were more then a few occasions when he went out of his way to help his friends. In cricket too, we referred to ourselves as the spin twins since he would bowl leg spin and me off spin to bamboozle batsmen. Extremely popular with his friends, a family man, a good sportsman and hardworking academically and career wise - these were the traits that defined him. Wherever Venkat is I’m sure and convinced that he’s the life of the room and the most loved there. Sudhir Syal

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Lest we forget Condolences received by way of visits, cards, email messages and telephone calls The family takes the opportunity to thank friends and families of 1. Venkat’s friends from Sishya, MUWC, Loyola College, Kogod School of Business, Washington DC, Landor and William Lea 2. Rohini, Rukmini and Sudeep 3. Beena’s family and friends 4. My family and friends in Chennai, schoolmates from Lawrence School, Lovedale, classmates from College of Engineering, Guindy, friends from Overseas, colleagues from MacCivil, MCCL and Hilton. Friends from my fraternity in Freemasonry, Round Table, 41 Clubs of India and the Madras Gymkhana Club and KCWA.

This is an excerpt from a letter written by Venkat’s best friend’s mother, (Abeet’s mother Karuna Pillai): Miss Me- But Let Me Go When I come to the end of the Road and the Sun has set for me, I want no sites in a gloom filled room, Why cry for a soul set free? Miss me a Little- But not too Long And not with your Head bowed low, Remember the Love we once shared, Miss me—But Let me Go. For this is a journey we all must take And each must go alone, It’s all a part of the Master’s plan A step on the Road to Home, When you are lonely and sick at Heart, Go to the Friends we know And bury your sorrows in doing Good Deeds, Miss Me-But Let Me Go… Karuna (Abeet’s last words to his friend was “Bye my Brother from another Mother”)

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With the loss of his son, Venkat in 2015, Gopi embarked to preserve his legacy by emerging with “Reminiscence – A Journey of Three Generations” a first in a writing effort. Gopi chronicles his parent’s nomadic life in the Services, his opportunities in his civil engineering career taking him from India, the USA and the Far East on challenging projects. A student of the Lawrence School, Lovedale (1967) passed his undergraduate with BE (Hons) degree and a University Gold Medal (1973) at the College of Engineering, Guindy, Madras (his father S.P. Govindarajulu being an Alumnus, 1941-1945). He received a Master’s degree from the University of California, Berkeley,USA.

“This book is a story of love. Through the lives of fathers and sons, spanning three generations of a family, it tells of the love that parents and children have for one another, of giving and receiving it in abundance, of how love never ends, but goes on beyond one’s lifetime to inspire all who experienced it. All three protagonists are men who valued honour, compassion and faithfulness, who took pride in their high principles, and who enjoyed life in all its myriad aspects. It is a gentle book of lives well lived.” Jayashree Kumar

Author’s photo courtesy Viraj Krish

“Gopi garu’s father-in-law, Col. Sanjeev Rao and my father, Dr. M.S. Sanjeevi Rao have been great friends and by its virtue I have known Gopi garu and Beena Akka since childhood. The candid narrative makes fascinating reading, even sharing his embarrassing and trying moments, whilst allowing us to see, the different parts of the world where he lived and worked as a civil engineer.” Dr. M.M. Pallam Raju BE, MBA (Temple) Former Union Cabinet Minister

“This book of three generations of his family by Gopi, is unique. Features a number of carefully chosen photographs with a well written chronicle. Excellent design coupled with insets makes for a very interesting read. A collector’s item for the legacy of Gopi’s extended family and friends.” R.V. Rajan, veteran adman, Rotarian, Author

Reminiscence

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